>HOLY FUCK >Be me >17 >Talking to friends in high
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
>HOLY FUCK
>Be me
>17
>Talking to friends in high school about Asian massage parlors and happy endings as a sorta joke.
>Decide in the moment to gather some cash and actually go to one.
>about a month later I go and get jerked off.
> Go five other times over the course off the year.
>This becomes my fetish of sorts.
>Get a girlfriend and after a few months of sex tell her about it.
>She thinks its weird but goes along and she likes it too
>fast forward a few more months and she gets recruited by the navy and we break up on good terms
>Whatever
>Realize I can go to massage parlors again
>YAAAAAYY
>Decide to hit up the old spot and turns out the lady who uses to do it for me moved to another parlor
>Go there and meet new girls because (lets call her Ling) Ling introduces me and blah blah
>Go about once a week, sometimes just to chill out with the girls because they were super chill even after me facefucking almost all of them.
> This becomes my fetish and whenever I did jerk off I would think of these girls and the situation.
>Oh shit the internet exists!
>Look up asian massage parlor porn
>It felt like I struck gold.
>Fap vigorously to tons of videos and download a fuck ton.
>Have them all saved on my computer at home.
Cont?
continue
>>713318376
Does it end in finding out your girlfriend started working in a massage parlour giving out her own happy endings?
>>713318376
Ok
>this continues for a few weeks
>until I found this one video
>FUCKING AMAZING
>I fap to this video and only this video for like a solid month it was that good.
>Come home one day from college and my mom tells me to sit down because we need to talk
>See my bedroom door wide open....
>my computer doesn't have a password lock
>oh fuck
>Nope
>Mom starts telling me that my dad is not my real dad and in fact he is my step dad.
>??what??
>You also have a sister who is 6 years older than you.
>You never meet here because she went with your dad to live in Canada when you were very small
>I just got a call from your real dad and he says your sister is missing and left home without any notice
>We think she might be coming here to Anonville
>OH FUCK
>This wave of knowledge hits me like a fucking truck and im in tears
>mom consoles me and fails, so I get out and go to Lings shop and hang out there and tell them what happened
>They listen and try to cheer me up with tea and cookies
>It kinda works but I wasnt really feeling it
>leave feeling a little better but still shattered
>A week goes by and we start shopping for Thanksgiving stuff
Cont?
yes please
Boiiii keep going, im invested (include me in the screenshot)
>>713319722
Continue
>>713320003
Red
OP if you're saying what I think you're saying, then I'm about to lose my shit. Please, continue.
ZOOMED WORDS
This is obviously a Don't Stop Believing greentext.
>>713318376
>>713319722
OK
>Thanksgiving rolls around and moms family and some close friends start to show up
> hop in shower and rub one out to the video
>about an hour into eating we get a knock on the door
>guess who
>ITS MY FUCKING SISTER
>HOLY SHIT
>MOM STARTS CRYING HER EYES OUT AND GRANDMA PASSES OUT
>EVERYBODY IS GOING FUCKING CRAZY
>im still in my chair shocked by everybodies reaction to get up and look
>Hello everybody my name is Marissa.
>There is a wall between the kitchen and the front door so I didnt get to see her face
>But her voice sent cold shivers down my back and all the hairs on my body shoot up
>I know this voice, but from where?!?
>Get up to look and before I can get a good look at her face she hugs me and buries her face in my chest
>The voice
>Bright blonde hair
>Short stature
>I feel the tears soaking through my shirt but my mind is going a million miles a minute
>She looks up and...
cont?
>
>
>
>
>
>>713320900
Nigga just end it
>>713320900
Go on, I'm waiting~
>>713320900
We're clearly about to get speckledorfed
>>713320900
cumming buckets OP continue...
>>713320900
>cont?
No. Just fucking stop already, jesus christ.
>>713320900
I know this is going to be a troll
But I still want to see what the joke is
>>713320900
Get on with the joke fag
>>713320900
nah I dont really want you to continue the story op sorry im just not feeling up to it.
>>713320900
finish it
>>713320900
wtf. just do it already.
>>713320900
Cont., cunt.
>>713320900
End it pls
>>713320900
abandon thread, OP is a fag
We're waiting...
>>713318376
Type this shit out before posting
>>713320900
>says
>wheres my tree fiddy
>it was at that time I noticed she was about 500 feet tall and from the paleothic era
THIS GUY IS FUCKING TROLLING
>>713320900
>Mother
>Fucking
>9/11
>>713321799
was just typing this out anon, you beat me to it you son of a bitch.
>>713320900
Finish it
>>713320900
Disregard that, i suck cocks.
>>713318376
>>713320900
Sorry Sis came in.
>She looks up and sees my face
>Her eyes are wide open as she comes to realization that I am OP and I'm a faggot for not fucking typing this all out before posting this thread and leaving everybody hanging
>Speaking of hanging, I think I'll go do that now
>>713321952
Kek
20 bucks says he dated/fucked his sister without realizing it
>>713321952
>>713321799
see if this is actually op imma stab a bitch
>>713322063
That's probably what it is. Meh, I can live with that ending. Later faggots
>>713321952
kek
>>713322063
20 bucks says hes a faggot
>>713320900
OK ANONS HERE YOU GO
>She looks up
>And she gets the most shocked look on her face
>its ling from the massage parlor
>How did i not know this all along
>suddenly she leans over almost out of habit and unzips my pants
>Gives me wicked succ right in front of the entire family
>Grandma has a seizure and dies on the spot
>We go to the funeral
>to bad grandma didnt get a happy ending
>>713322063
shes obv the chick in the video, christ this guys writes like an engineer.
Great jape OP, 10/10 would get japed again.
>>713322195
That's fucking it?
>>713322195
>too bad grandma didnt get a happy ending
>>713318376
>>to bad grandma didnt get a happy ending
Kek
>>713322327
ye but wouldnt that bird be asian? and actually look like op
>>713322343
awe yeah
Calling all faggots. Let's get DUBS
>>713322361
>>713322402
>>713322403
YEAH THATS IT, HOPE YOU GOT A GOOD LAUGH ANONS XD
>>713319722
I want this dang video man
>>713318376
>>713319722
>>713320900
ok
>its her.
>My long lost sister is the masseuse from the video
>I have been fapping to my sister for the last month.
>Because I had essentialy trained my dick to get erect at the thought of this girl upon seeing her face I get a massive boner but this was like I stream lined a bottle of viagra
>HOLY FUCK
>I realize this and as soon as she lets go I pretend to almost pass out and fall to the floor in an effort to hide my boner
>it works
>kinda
>nobody except my 10 year old cousin sees
>whatever
>Mom comes rushing over to pick me up and I refuse and insist that I need a moment to collect myself
>still have a massive hard on and what is supposed to be one of the happiest moments of my life is being ruined by my own perversion
>do the flexing trick and it somewhat goes away but i still had like halfchub
>whatever
>I get up and am surrounded by my family and we include her in the festivities
>she stays with us for the weekend
>Over the weekend we talk and I get to know her and turns out that she is a professional masseuse and has worked at a lot of parlors
>Mom chimes in and says I hope you didnt do anything illegal while working at those places
>She laughs and shrugs it off
>I knew she was lying, not only could I see it in her face but I actually had evidence.
>She asks if I know any places that are hiring as a joke and I said yes
>Oh really? If i get hired maybe ill stay down here instead
>Give her Lings number and say nothing else
>I leave saturday morning before she wakes up and head to a friends house
>get home and she is sitting in my room
>Hey annon I hope you dont mind but mom let me use your comp
>sure go for it
>at this point I had locked all my porn
>except for 1 video
>YUP
>>713322500
confirmed
OP is a time traveling cuck
>Grandma....no...
>>713322566
>>713322500
o shit bois
>>713322500
reporting for trips.
>>713322561
1/10 worse plot than big bang theory. faggot confirmed
>>713322722
close enough
>>713322500
TWO SECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
>>713322744
dubs confirm
>>713322566
TWO SECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
>>713322561
is that it
>>713322419
called it. god damn its the least subtle shit ive ever read. next she'll say she saw the video and he'll blackmail her into a handjob. the end.
>>713322722
TWO SECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
>>713322877
dubs good to go
The numbers in this thread are insane
>>713322877
>>713322744
TWO SECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
>>713322877
yaaay im helping.
OP is gayfaggot
Didn't even turn it into a dinosaur
>>713322984
why do we get drawn into this shit /b/ro, its been too long since a legendary greentext
>>713323076
oh fuck off by one
>>713323111
holy shit this is a great get thread
>>713323111
THREE SECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
>>713323177
TWO SECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
Link the video
>>713323111
Agreed
>>713323177
againnnnnnn
>>713323411
TWO SECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
>>713323411
checkem
>>713323411
dubs? got.
>>713323499
dubs? gottem again.
>>713323499
dubble dubs
>>713323499
TWO SECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
>>713323544
TWO SECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
if anyones got numbers its me
>>713323544
and duble dubs to you good sir
>>713323544
>>713323499
What the fuck is wrong with this thread? Did OP leave some sort of dubs script running while writing this? Fuck the story, look at all of these dubs!
>>713322561
please finish so i can
Link the video, else its proven you're a lying sack of shit.
Can I have dubs?
>>713323687
Dubs shmubs
>>713323714
this
>>713323755
TWO SECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
>>713323755
checked
HERE WE GO BOYS
>>713323748
you can borrow mine when im done with em
Getto daze!
>>713323939
cccccoomfigokdos brwkaker
>>713323714
I agree
Get
>>713323807
what is up with all these gets
>>713323880
uh.. these were the ones i was looking for, those were just gag dubs
check em
Is OP kill?
>>713323977
TWO SECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
>>713323988
>>713323988
All hail Hitlers war machine
>>713323988
TWO SECUTIVE INTERGER NUMBERS
>>713324016
Faggot
Get
>>713324016
00 get
>>713324016
fag
skeletons cant get dubs
>>713324133
TWO SECUTIVE INTERGER NUMBERS
>>713318376
>>713323808
0k
>week goes by
>go to ching chong's masseuse parlor
>totally wanna fk my sis
>ask for anonnette
>sis was actually my grandma
>granny's about to pass out
>my bbc must've been surprising
>she fell to the floor
>everybody walk the dinosaur
>>713323976
>>713324042
>>713324105
Fuck me
>>713324133
>>713323988
>>713323977
This is a pretty good get thread
SINGLES GET
>>713324222
THREE SECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
Pls get
GEEEEEEEEEEEUT
>>713324016
omg whata fucking colossal waste of time
Artistic doubles.
>>713324222
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Doborus!
>>713324320
You're on /b/, you'll waste time no matter what
>>713323182
HOLY FUCK! WHERE ANON? I LIVE THERE I NEED THAT!
I will bring the digits back to this thread
aw fuck whose are these?
World of Getcraft
seems the dubs have died down. the increased numbers have scared them off.
>>713324478
haven't scared off these
Nice
>>713324478
I beg to differ, predict the return of the bountiful dubs
get is for faggots.
Any idiot can dubs. Satan trips is a fucking talent.
>>713324533
lmao stolen dubs
>>713324533
TWO SECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
can i get some dubs too?
Dubs gets the vid
Have the consecutive integer numbers returned?
>>713324644
TWO SECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
>>713324644
dubberydoodah
>>713324671
Dubs are as kill as this bread
>>713324648
FUCKING AUSTRALIANS GET OUT
try these
Trips get
>>713318376
last one boys sorry for taking so long to type
> half hour goes by before I go into my room again
>As soon as I walk in she closes a tab and gets super flustered
>Whats wrong?
>Nothing just something from my past i forgot about, its nothing really
>grab the charger for my phone and walk out closing the door behind me
>I wait at the door for about a minute and rush back in
>She watching the video
>OH FUCK OH FUCK OH FUCK OH FUCK
>In a super calm voice "Where did you get this video?"
>I found it on internet, this was before I knew you even existed. I swear.
>She closes the tab and walks out of my room
>She brings my mom to the living room and starts telling her about all the bad shit shes had to do to stay alive because apparently our dad was a massive dick
>she tells her about the video
>She doesnt tell her I have the video but she says she knows it exists
>Mom understand and they have a moment
>Grab my car keys and start heading out the door
>Annon wait!
>I̶ ̶n̶e̶e̶d̶ ̶a̶b̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶t̶r̶e̶e̶'̶f̶i̶d̶d̶y̶
>Where are you going?
>I cant be here right now
>I need leave like now
>I try to leave but she pulls on my arm and brings me back inside
>She sits me down and hugs me
>dont be embarrassed that you jerked of to me, you didnt know I was your sister and its fine. Shit happens.
>MFW she said that outload
>Mom heard
>OH FUCK
>WHAT?!?!
>Annon found the video by mistake and well he did what men do.
>Mom passes out and we wake her up after about 10 minutes
>Let me see the video
>.....
>we all watch the video in the most akward thing ive done in my life
>After the video ends mom asks how many times did you wank to this video
>maybe 2 or 3 times
>I lied it was closer to 40
>someone knocks on the door
>Its my real dad!
>Hes super drunk and starts swinging at me thinking im my stepdad
>He hits me and I swing back
>we end up on the lawn bloody tired
>cops show up and take him away
And that folks is the story of how I meet my entire family.
>>713324671
not in the same concentration unfortunatley, they have rarified
>>713324722
TWO CONSECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
>>713324644
>>713324722
>>713324733
>>713324755
>>713324171
Fucking skeleton fuck
>>713324722
>>713324733
not bad
>>713324733
TWO CONSECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
Check 'em.
>>713324222
Fail?
>>713324755
oh fuck off op, no one cares about your shit tier story. this is now a get thread
>>713324441
Honorable attempt.
>>713324864
At least he contributed with more dubs
>>713324864
I DEMAND A 'GET'
>>713324755
V I D E O god dammint
All these gets... Will it ever be my turn?
I DEMAND A GET
>>713324755
TWO CONSECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
CHECK MY DUBS FAGGOTS
>>713324755
nice dubs and good story anon, i'll screenshot it just in case I need a smile
>>713324944
TWO CONSECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
>>713322195
LOST. FUCKING LOST
NOT EVEN YLYL AND I FUCKING LOST
>if you look into the SE sky, you will see my sides in orbit
Get? What is this? Am I doing it right?
>>713324939
i forget what website its from and since im on mobile at the sherrifs office I cant look for it
Get
>>713324755
Cool story.(not sarcasm)
>>713324755
Cheked. 9/11
>I lied it was closer to 40
kek
>>713324755
>not dinosauring with your familia at the end
2/10 because lack of dinodancers
>>713324864
>says story is shit
>thinks get thread is better
>>713324755
post the video
>>713318376
Some of those massage parlor porns are a bit crazy
>pic related...paror girl eats a ton of smegma off this dudes dick, and gives him a "nose job" where she smells his dick and takes the load in her nose...
>>713325013
thread derailed
R.I.P. OP's story time
I call for two consecutive integer numbers in the top-right corner of my post
>>713325055
TWO CONSECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
>>713325161
link?
Lord Kek, may I please have dubs?
>>713325155
TWO CONSECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
>>713318376
>>713319722
>>713320900
>>713322561
>>713318376
Sorry Wifi was fucked
>Sister looks me directly in the eyes
>Massive boner ensues
>she looks down and notices my bulge
>she stands up and walks over to me seductively
> I was on your computer and I saw a video.
>It reminded me of how long it's been since I've given a proper massage. >Would you be a good little brother and let me practice on you, anon?
>stutter out a y...yes and reach into pocket for condom
>mfw all my spaghetti falls out
>sister tells me it's missing meatballs and morphs into Jared from Subway
>Jared pulls out a foot long meatball sub on Italian herbs and cheese
>bends me over
>pulls down my pants and shoves it into my asshole
>I let out a moan of pain and extassy as a single tear rolls down my cheek
>The marinara burns my anus
>whimper "that's a spicy meatball"
>kill myeslf for not finishing my gay greentext
>>713325166
TWO CONSECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
Fuck this is a good thread
Get? What is this? Am I doing it right? Dubs get!
>>713325275
OP, YOU ARE NOT CONTRITUBING WITH TWO OR MORE CONSECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS, COME BACK WHEN YOU '''''''''>GET''''''''''''''''
Rool
>>713325343
>>713325389
>>713324755
nice story OP now link that shit
>>713324249
check em
give me the two consecutive integer numbers, pls
>>713325428
I'm not leaving till I get dubs
>>713325455
TWO CONSECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
Two conductive numbers
>>713325488
TWO CONSECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
>>713325455
thats a nice get you have there, shame to just leave them here all alone, how about i leave you some dubs?
Hoping for them dubs.
>>713325275
HahahahahahHa
4 consecutive integer numbers
>>713325555
nice
>>713325554
>>713325557
we missed the four consecutive integer numbers
Roll
git
Trips are all mine
44
>>713325688
TWO CONSECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
>>713325625
R.I.P. our consecutive integer numbers
Dubs are overrated
>>713325688
Fuck dubs, trips get
>>713325777
You motherfucker
Shinjū
>>713324944
Got
>>713325747
Sauce?
>>713325777
THREE CONSECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBER
Fuck
>>713325777
hevenly trips
>>713325777
W I T N E S S E D
no motherfucker is leaving until quads are had
>>713325931
Fuck off these trips are mine
Check 'em.
1
>>713325862
no sauce bauce
>>713325945
What if I get them fag
2
>>713325945
We're in for the long haul then, around 600 posts over /b/ left
>>713325994
GIVE ME QUADS OR GIVE ME DEATH
>>713324755
Post video you lying incestuous faggot
>>713325777
As OP I congratulate you on your amazing trips
3
Post vid. Want to jerk of to your sis too
>>713326099
TWO CONSECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
4
>>713326040
Death it is
>>713326053
Post video or at least link to preview
5
>>713326040
>>713326124
>124
>4
Well done
was the first ever /b/ post 000000001?
>>713324755
Post preview of video you scumbag
>>713326187
It would have been 1
>>713325245
Its a paid vid but sure the link is http://www.r18.com/videos/vod/movies/detail/Smelly-Dicks%21-Nose-Jobs%21%21/id=36doks00242/
You can even watch the sample...but i watn you...its some pretty fuckin kinky shit
>>713326187
Was it?
and get
>>713326286
Well you're not getting hard
Or getting
GIT
>>713326329
Neither are you 5&_
713326384 get
QUADS OR BUST!
>713326427 get
Seventy two get
o kek, please will me dubs. in shadilay i pray.
>>713326459
close but not close enough
>713326503
>713326600
>>713326392
Probably you. The one who posted this picture is probably the best throat smoker
>>713326511
TWO CONSECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
713326557
Eighty one get
>713326578
Get or not get, that is the question.
Pls
>>713326582
Jesus fucking Christ stop that almost scared me I'm too high for you to actually do it my brain could slush
>713326614
This is better than dubs
>>713326582
So close
>>713326588
TWO CONSECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
If this isn't subs I'm going to bed
Fifty six get
Gib trips
>713326677
Double dubs
>98 get
Rip Get
Pussy get
tf is a get
>27 get
>>713326701
Double dix
>713326712
>>713326667
You were so close to quads.
780
98
nvm i think i get it
I am the Consecutive Integer Numbers guy, I will have to leave you now for I have to return to my jew economics class
>>713326811
Also, TWO CONSECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
>>713326735
Newfag
>And my post # is 713326837
Ok if i get dubs i will fully believe in meme magic...i have a full pepe collection so let me get those SEVENS
>>713326811
Also, TWO CONSECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS.
If dubs everyone in threads mother dies in their sleep from nigger rape in the throats sausage
>713326880
>>713326811
TWO CONSECUTIVE INTEGER NUMBERS
>>713326811
At least you got two consecutive integer numbers.
Thirty six
>>713326392
They both look they give aids
lets get these TRIPS BOYS
>713326949
>>713326856
See anon you have to already believe in meme magic for it to work for you
>Abra ka check em
gg trips
>>713327022
Nope, just dubs
>713327100
great story my dude. 10/10 fake or not
>>713327014
dumbass you forgot to praise kek
PRAISE KEK
>>713327077
Check myself and also >713327113
>>713327077
Nice dubs, but not dubzeros.
>713327186
Rip thread
>>713327107
Tgat actually gave me harden
Praise Kek and I'm outta here
>02
54
>>713327213
>Not knowing how to (you) yourself
>>7133386
>91
I want to get dubs too
>>713327542
ouh :(
>>000000000
quads is comig up faggots
quads get
quads gettem
>>713327790
>>713327748
missed faggots
>>713327777
