Tech people who fix peoples computers
What is the craziest shit you've found on someone's computer that you are fixing?
Dead flies in a condom
>>714309691
Several video files of a pensioner cheating on his wife.
>>714309691
No Man's Sky.
>>714309808
None of this now needed: Baby dead.
>>714309691
Never anything crazier than nudes...
Lots and lots of nudes
>>714309691
nudes of her and various dick pics in the recycle bin
>don't ask for pics this was years ago
>>714309691
generally i don't even look
I used to work in computer repair. Sometimes free computers would come through for parts and etc. I found a computer in the trash once, so I decided to snoop on the hard drive.
There were shitloads of text documents just saying "Matt is a Jew." over and over again. There were probably about 150 separate documents, all saying that same phrase.
>>714310105
Ah yes. The old recycle bin.
>guy brings in a desktop to debug
>has a ton of viruses in it
>doing my thing
>take a look in his recycle folder
>loaded with pics and videos
>mostly downloads
>one video labeled "me"
>curious so open it up
>video of this guy sucking on one dildo while fucking himself on another
>immediately washed my hands and wiped down the desktop with clorox wipes
BTW - guy was real good looking and married. Go figure.
I found child pornography in the recycling bin, I didn't mess with any of that shit though, just left it as is, the owner of the PC seemed like a normal dude though. Some of the most unsuspecting people are fucked in the head.
>>714309691
browser history only containing cuckold dwarf porns
>>714309939
kek
>>714309691
>Lot of edgy teen gore pictures
>Lot of porn
>One 16 year old hot chick had like 300 gb of hentai, was not expecting that
>Some autist had Excel spreadsheets with every day of his life recorded including masturbating
Also not crazy shit but I was given a trash computer with a bitcoin wallet on it with about $3500 in it a long time ago, should have held onto it because prices were so low back then.
Gay porn. Lots of porn.
>>714309691
Images of a white woman and a white man having consensual sex in the missionary position for the purpose of procreation.
>>714311927
my god the horror, hopefully you contacted the proper authorities
>>714311927
I just threw up a little in my mouth.
>>714309939
Top kek
>child porn, heaps of child porn shits nasty
>15 yearold brought in a laptop, had heaps of "hacker" programs (viruses)
>40 yearold woman came in, had minion memes in a folder
>>714312484
>>40 yearold woman came in, had minion memes in a folder
gross
Sand.
Said the laptop couldnt hold a charge, they've had it for two years. Noticed the battery was still in the packaging in the original box.
Decided to crack it open and clean it out anyway, they were paying for the service afterall, may as well do something.
Sand. A stupid amount of sand.
What really bugged me is the laptop had no battery so it wasn't mobile, how the fuck did it get that much sand in it?
Everybody here who thinks its unusual to save porn on a personal pc is retarded.
>tfw desktop recently died
>too chicken shit to take it to get diagnosed or repaired because of /b/ folder and shit tons of TOTALLY LEGAL ANIME
At least I still have muh laptop
>>714313028
Mine is hidden somewhere deep inside windows files
>>714310641
Wut.exe
>>714313142
>Not knowing how to remove a drive and pluging it into another pc
>>714310641
Pretty interesting, I'd dig further if I were you
>>714313310
It's not even that. My desktop was like my baby. I can't just throw away my baby.
Really, I think my mobo is just fried cause the thing doesn't post. The PSU is fine, everything clicks on and stuff. But the thing won't post.
Also I don't have another PC to plug it into, faggot.
>>714309691
Father in law's laptop had 2 or 3 short porn videos. Looks old, 90's, one of them the chick was actually getting fucked by an ear of corn.
>mfw he's latino
>>714309691
Nudes (17 year old girl) and barbed wire festish porn from some old dude.
>>714313468
>says he has a laptop
>doesn't have another computer to plug hdd into
le wut?
>>714313468
You have laptop, buy a fucking sata -> usb adapter and delete your tentacle loli porn. Put hdd back to PC and let some nerd fix it without worrying that CIA will drone-strike your ass.
>>714310641
Sounds like the guy who used that computer had a colleague named Matt and couldn't express his frustration with him so typed random file names on his desktop.
Shame on him for being an anti semite in 2k16 though.
>>714313468
I had the same feeling for my second pc. Still have the same case and all the hard drives as backups.
You can buy a drive to usb adapter for 5$
Since we're here might as well ask.
Is there any specific way to become a pc-repair man? Im actually searching for some course to do,but haven't done any school for this when i was young. (im 23yo)
We usualy get a pedo come in every few months begging us to fix his drives.
When the customer specifically ask us not to check the content on the disk we know we got another pedo on our hands.
>>714311927
Did you turn the hard drive into the cyber police? That shit is fucked, dude.
>>714313001
It must have been on a fucking beach you brainless imbecile bastard
>>714313701
Never realized that
>>714313703
>>714313733
THESE existed. Might check that out. Thanks /b/. You flaming faggots.
>>714313468
if you're this retarded then you shouldn't have a pc.
time to start using apple products.
>>714313832
Wow, you sure convinced me with your hot opinions.
>>714313829
reading comprehension fail
It doesn't have a battery so how can it be used on a beach?
>>714313001
Maybe they used it while eating a lot of...sandwiches.
>>714310641
Nah, that's bullshit. I know matt, and he totally isn't.
>>714313829
Can you not into reading comprehension?
>>714313931
Oh snap, are you the same guy from that "Fallout" thread?
>[Empty]
>Open anyway
Well, I made a code that opens the Pokémon Go Song infinitely and it crashed my friends computer
>Mom brings PC, says smoke is coming out
>Open it up
>Large plastic bag of weed inside
Funny as shit, Mom threw a huge tantrum and called the police to get her son arrested.
>>714309691
child porn, now he is in prison
>>714313195
I hide all of my porn in civ 5 game files
>>714309691
Doesn't really count since this computer was actually recovered from some trash, but I found a folder in some guy's windows directory filled with pictures of chicks in slutty clothes and high heels killing small mice by sitting on them and crushing them with their heels. Creepiest shit I actually found on a computer, but tame by /b/ standards.
>>714313195
That's adorable. I rembember hiding my stuff too.
>>714309691
Pedo-Porn and Darknet-Files, also some datas with really evil shitzzz
we called the Police und they jailed him for 13 years
There where Porns were he fucked and kilked Childs himself
FunFact: he just wanted us to kill a Virus kek
>>714311508
And that wallet didn't have a passphrase, huh? Seems totally legit.
>>714313931
>>714313912
>Magically can't have been on a beach physically because it doesn't physically have a battery in it
Is there some force field that stops you from entering within a 5 mile radius of a beach if you're carrying a batteryless laptop?
Did you guys get on the short bus?
>>714313912
I'll take What's an extension cord? for about tree fidy thanks.
Screen shots of 4chan .... dude was a sick fuck.
>>714309691
I am professional and very discreet with the information of my clients.
>>714311098
Serious question: do you have legal obligation to turn him in?
Another way to think about it: if he got caught and it was discovered you had accessed his computer immediately prior, could you be fucked?
3G wasnt working in a guys company phone.
I decided to see some files, just for curiosity
lots of pics of his wife naked (I know her)
>>714314105
>hide
>mein sides
ever hear of picasa dickhead?
>>714309939
>>714310641
I don't know one single jew named Matthew.
Smells bullshit..
>>714311508
Damn
was a lot of it videos or plain image files?
>>714310012
Dear Mr K. Dilkington,
>>714309939
OMG ANON DID IT
>>714314233
what kind of sperglord are you that you take a copmputer with now power to the beach with you?
is that like fake texting when you're around other people?
>>714313195
%appdata% isn't deep, dumbass
>>714314481
You can't use dollar sign in paths faggot
>>714314280
>Another way to think about it: if he got caught and it was discovered you had accessed his computer immediately prior, could you be fucked?
This is an interesting question.
>>714313195
mines hidden in the "My Porn" folder
>>714310933
He's doing his thing. god bless him
Why do you spastics download porn when you can just look it up on any porn site?
Are you fucking retards still jacking it to pictures? Are you all 13?
>>714314468
>sand
>beach
Does you're pea brain not connect those two things dipshit? I don't take computers with no power to a beach personally but it's not unreasonable to assume if something's filled with sand that it's been at a beach of some sort. Your annoying me now so im gonna stop replying.
I work at a Geek Squad in the Midwest. We've had to call the cops for child porn on two separate occasions.
>>714313001
Probably deployed to iraqor something
>>714313915
Sandwiches do not involve actual sand.
>>714314233
So what you're saying is you're the kind of brainless retard who'd take a battery-less computer to a fucking beach and use an extension cord or sit close enough to an outlet that you may as well not be at the beach at all?
This is why I'm glad fertility rates have dropped globally.
>>714314580
>>714314280
What stops tech guys from saying they didn't see it?
>>714314652
I collect the things i actually consider quality so i can access it fast, why is this concept so alien to you?
I don't need files to keep porn. I got irl memory.
You're going to think I'm making this up, but shit is 100% true. I've been a PC Tech for years now, and I knew this family from a few years back, we were on good terms and I'd advise them whenever they wanted a new iPad or Phone.
So it's the Mother (47 year old redhead, not great looking but I've seen worse), Dad who is 43, Son who is 11 and Daughter who is 17. Dad asks me to come over and take a look, he thinks something is wrong with his laptop. Someone had dropped it and the hard drive was on its way out, so I removed the drive and said I'll try and recover whatever I can for them. Dad gets a slightly worried look on his face and says, "Maybe we should just get a new one!" Mother disagrees and says she doesn't want to lose their family pictures, so he reluctantly agrees. I think nothing of it.
Anyway, recovery runs overnight, I check the next morning and most files have been recovered. But there's a hidden folder stored in the Windows directory with mpegs in it. Wanna guess what those video files were?
Daddy lying with his pants off on the couch. Right, okay, I really don't want to see ugly wife come in, I think I'm gonna turn off now--- Suddenly this tight little ass appears with long blonde hair down her back. Oh shit! Daddy has a girlfriend!!! Girl gets down and starts sucking him off for a few minutes, then proceeds to mount and ride him for another 5 minutes or so, but this bitch is really fucking into it. I see her face turn to the side and it's his fucking DAUGHTER. He blows his load inside her, hands some toilet paper, she gets off and a bit of cum drips out of her, walks off, and Dad walks over to the laptop and stops the vid.
The folder was full of videos just like that. He had been fucking his daughter and filming it on webcam and the files were dated two years prior, which means she was 14/15 at the time. But she looks like she was really fucking into it! If he was raping her, it was statutory only.
>>714311927
Jesus Christ, I was fucking eating when I read that. That is disgusting.
>>714314324
He did that on purpose. Wants you to join them.
>>714314669
>your annoying
>your
>'e
>>714314652
incase the wifi goes out
Barf
>>714313468
>Throw away my baby
cause the HDD is fucked?
Do you not know or just don't care?
>>714314669
>I'm going to stop reply. Not because I'm a moron, but because you're annoying me with logic.
It is EXTREMELY unreasonable to assume someone took a laptop to a beach without a means of mobility. When you think convenient electricity, the beach is the last place you'd assume.
With that in mind, the presence of sand inside a laptop with no mobile power source would strike anyone as unreasonable. That's no to say it's not possible, since no one said it wasn't, it's to say that one wouldn't assume they brought a computer to a beach with the intention of finding an outlet, plugging it in, and using it while tethered to said outlet which would be far enough from the water that it'd be pointless to be at the beach at all.
>>714314669
Not this anon but the first one who called out you reading comp. failures. Of course it was taken somewhere where there's a lot of sand ostensibly, but no reasonable, sane person would do it. That's what makes it funny.
We're pointing out how silly it is, it isn't forbidden by the laws of physics.
You must be capital-A Autistic to serious have issues like this. The sort of dude who needs jokes to be explained to them.
>>714314652
At home it's fine, but on my travels I'm often in places with horrible wifi, and at that point I turn to my downloaded collection. Can't jack it to a vid that's buffering every 3 seconds.
>>714314580
In Germany, u cant be fucked
If they get caught, they are fucked, if u caught them u r a Hero for Police bruh
Also the costumer allows u too see his data immedialtly when he hands out his pc
But its forbidden to copy personel Data
Buuuuut if the Guy hav some Movies and Songs u Can copy them cause they arent Personen shit :0
>>714315098
Can you read?
>>714314881
>>714314280
Nope. They would have to prove you actual viewed the folderor content. It would be to big of a hassle just to get a guy that was just doing his job.
>>714314719
this needed to be said
>>714315127
>>714315122
fucking hivemind
>>714314979
As for wierdest files, all I can think of is homemade pronz... you get LOTS of that
>>714315211
>to be said
>be said
>be sand
>>714310641
are you sure it wasn't "Mark" ?
>>714314557
>dollar sign
Are you fucking autistic?
>>714315283
I sea what you did thar...
>>714315221
The saying "ignorance is bliss" was created specifically for you.
You're really fucking dumb, it's almost unfathomable.
Kingdom hears isos and queen of stone age discography.
>>714313703
>sata -> usb
then you transform your internal HD into an external HD? But don't you need power to run this HD? Is that power provided by the USB?
Inversely, I have an external 2tb drive that I don't use. Can I USB -> Sata so that I can use as an internal it in my next PC?
>inb4 Yes, I suck at PC.
this thread is a good thread
>>714313766
do you report them to the five-oh?
>>714315466
just look up one of those adapters
>>714315466
HDs with 1Tb or less can use usb power, and yes, sata is sata. Some Samsung external drives doesnt have the sata connector anyways.
>>714314557
Dunno if troll or dumb...
But yeah you can, they're called administrative shares. Just try it : \\127.0.0.1\c$
By the way, 127.0.0.1 is the local address of your own pc...
I'm not hacking you, future person that thinks everyone is after him...
>>714315466
External drives are usually just Internal Drives inside caddies, open up the caddy and you'll find a nice normal 3.5" hard drive inside which you can then install inside your PC.
Inversely, internal drives can be placed inside caddies which then connect via USB and work well as backup drives.
>>714313746
I did work study in the computer lab at uni - I got hired afterward just because I could format drives and solve network issues. I learned the rest on the job.
>>714315497
it's company policy to do so.
If we dont we might get fucked if the dude gets caught.
>>714314652
its autism
>>714315712
Or you can buy a "docking station" for HDD's, which are very cheap and really handy, especially if you have a lot of HDD's.
>>714313746
Find a small local repair place, tell them that you want to do what they do and you've studied a bit but you have zero experience. Offer to shadow them and help them, supervised, for free. Spend a year doing this in your spare time (doesn't need to be 8 hours a day every day, just a few hours a week). Get them to show you how to open up Laptops, strip out screens and motherboards, etc. Once you have a feel for computers it's a piece of piss.
You can then freelance and do home repairs for old people who are too terrified to take their PCs to someone else to fix.
>>714314881
Poor girls. They actually end liking it. Before all the shame of having liked it.
>pictures of dead babies
definitely wasn't his OC. random filenames, most had watermarks. hundreds and hundreds of pics. ranging from aborted fetuses, up to maybe 5-ish years olds. the only other porn he had on there was pregnancy porn...
>>714314580
Also the problem is: if you turn him in, then you must have seen the files too. So you are risking a court trial too. And the criminal could sue you too for breaching his privacy (only in some countries). I would keep my mouth shut.
>>714315165
Try that. The customer sues you for disclosing his private info (up to two years of jail) and the state will drag you to cort for possession of illegal stuff (you have to proove, that you didn't willingly recieve it). Then they are allowed to search your pcs and will surely find something on them. Believe me, german law is fucked in this matter.
>>714315787
I would've thought such a thing as customer privacy existed in regards to tech.
>>714314280
Why is it a crime to look at something, you're not actually touching it, that's like arresting someone for looking at weed or crack.
>>714313195
>2016
>not using virtual encrypted drives to store your porn
>mfw
>>714313746
Comprises a+ maybe? It'd be a start at least.
>>714315913
Thank you,i'll take that in consideration
>>714314723
>2016
>be me
>see some arsehole shitposting his little heart out on /b about not using a laptop at the beach with an extension cord
>finish the final swig of my maitai as I watch the sun set over barbados and call for my nubile wife to fetch me another ( I will probably pinch her arse when she brings it, she loves my dry witty banter)
>take in the wonder of nature as I gaze out over a glorious sunset so as not to miss out on what real life has to offer as I chuckle thinking about not bringing a laptop to beach
>go back to skyping with the hot model I just aquired for a beach orgy with my gorgeous wife and her sister that I will record with the HD cam built into my laptop. ( I gave up using the battery in my laptop long ago in case it fails and footage of the orgy could be lost, I stick strictly ro extension cords that I unfurl majestically from my beachside mansion)
>Well shit, the backdrops of a tropical beach at sunset that I used as my profile pic are lighting up my skype friends request list like a christmas tree!! I will be busy tonight!
>Undo my long lustrous hair and shake it in the light breeze as I flex my oiled biceps and loaugh thinking about how I will just grab another laptop from my laptop storage closet when this one becomes too clogged with sand to bother with.
>TLDR 2016 not using a laptop at the beach.
>>714316030
>dead babies
>porn
pham what the fuck?
>>714316148
>still being insecure about the mind-numbingly stupid social standards that teach you to be insecure about liking porn.
Lol. You're a special kind of miserable, eh?
>>714316271
Bruh calm Down
>>714315712
thanks for the answer. Is it you on the pic?
>>714316148
Civil encryption of data is illegal in a lot of countries funnily enough.
>>714316030
did it have the bathtub one in it?
asking for a friend
>>714316043
Im livin in Austria, us it sane fucked then in Germoney ?
>>714314729
Last accessed is a file property.
>>714316066
Gray zones. If you fix it and find it you have to report it. But if it was something like "he needed a new processor is all" I can easily say I had no reason to find such things on his pc. (Different pc store repair tech)
>>714314788
Not same guy, but I rarely jerk it to the same thing twice
>>714316467
Say that to me in real life and not online and see what happens fucker.
>>714309691
straight up child porn folder on the desktop
not much else
>>714316536
which ones?
Never heard of that.
>>714314411
i have a jewish friend named matt faggot used to be my room mate too
Only work with defense industry IT and no one would be stupid enough to to import anything remotely illegal or immoral. Quite boring.
Did work for a government agency dealing with education once when I was 18-20 and one night this married 50+ sleaze bag printed out Asian porn and forgot to get the print out. A female colleague found it and I had to go through his computer to look at his browser history. Was not awesome since I knew the guy, had a handicapped kid and everything. I'd rather not go through people's private shit since then. And I sure as hell wouldn't let anyone see my weird shit on a true crypt drive...
>>714316556
Germany is extremely fucked with IT laws. We glorify the privacy of a person. By law it can be compared to assault and is in your GG.
If a pc repairman discloses personal information, he has to pay every financial damage, the other person recieves. Also funny thing: if a repairman completely bricks a drive, that files are no longer accessible, he has to pay the worth of the files.
But it also has advantages, companies here are not so easy allowed to sell our data. Facebook is objecting those laws every year.
>>714316271
Think about how many braincells you killed coming up with that. Then multiply that by two because you're obviously European.
>>714316536
Not funny or true
>>714315913
It's exactly how 100% of PC men learn their job in Brazil and probably in all the other 3rd world countries. Those who study afterwards usually become the bosses of these PC repair samll businesses
>>714316915
>implying
>>714316776
He was pretending. Like in the big lebowski. Some people WANT to be jews. idk why.
>>714309691
Gigs and gigs of scat porn. Shit, piss, puke, used tampons, the whole fucking works. Co-workers spent over an hour going though it laughing. I was nearly throwing up after 5 minutes.
I was so disgusted with the shit I changed his wallpaper to one of the pics to let him know I'd found it, in the hope he'd never come back with another problem.
He came back a month or two later. I made his invoice out to 'the pooman' and charged him double.
>>714309691
Cockroaches. Literal, physical cockroaches came out of the computer. Owner was a filthy Indian.
>>714314881
Did u say anything
>>714316623
Also not the same guy, but I might not watch something twice in a row I might revisit it in a few weeks or months.
>>714316043
Viewing the files isn't the criminal offense, you idiot. Otherwise posting a picture of cp on facebook would create a thousand criminals.
>>714309691
the guy who brought his computer in had his skype and facebook logged in.
he's 40+ and all his contacts are 12-14 year olds and the chat logs are fucked.
the best one i read was "you're so young, i wonder how lovely you'd taste. I bet you taste like vanilla ice cream. Her name was emily and yes, she was 12.
NO i did not report.
>>714316704
You almost gotta admire how upfront it was
but not really
>>714313710
>CURRENT YEAR
>>714316410
nah, i dont even hide my porn. infact i run an FTP server that my friends can use to download it
>>714314881
This story needs resolution.
Unless the end is:
>bottled that shit up for years till finally posting about it on /b/
cause you can keep that unsatisfactory bullshit to your self and fiction up something to make us all happy.
I work tech support for a range of hardware products (not going into more detail as it's an independent company and you could find my personal info.) One of our products can be bought in the form of a PCIe card, like a graphics card except with a different function.
One of my favorite tickets started with a customer complaining that their card had stopped working. On further investigation we found that the card had physically had a hole burned through it.
To this day we don't know what happened.
>>714317320
Emily is dead now. Good job, anon.
>>714310641
That's because Matt is a Jew.
>>714314652
This. It's retarded to have a porn folder.
>>714316116
Weed & crack are physical things though so shit comparison
>get a call at 7pm from semi hysteric woman i know
>her husband is some bigshot gov guy and has a very important presentation in the morning
>his laptop just died and is making clicking noises
>he doesnt know what backups are, everything is lost
>i kinda owe them a couple favors
>drive accros town with public transport, luckely did not get robbed by niggers
>arrive at 9pm, the dude is a bit drunk, his wife still semi hysteric
>check drive, drive has a headcrash
>have compatible spareparts for that drive in the workshop, there is still hope
>drive to workshop with public transport, arrive at 11pm, still havent been jumped by niggers (a fuckin mirracle)
>tinker with drive drive for 3 hours, recover a bunch of files...without any info on the content
>have to put all his work back together, but cannot identifiy content without actually loading it
>half of the files are high quality pov scat porn pics of him, his wife and other guys
>sort his work/presentation from pov scat porn till 5am
>drive back, hand over new drive with recovered work
>pokerface while exchanging drive
>they know i know
>get 50€ for my trouble
>fml
another one
>some autistic coworker has to turn his company notebook in for an upgrade
>he thought its some bs routine inspection and didnt 'clean' it
>as he was leaving our office he realized that we we're going to look whats on it
>rushes back in and tries to talk us into giving it back
>poor guy is sweating and stuttering like crazy
>it guy is pissed and wont give notebook back
>as the it guy starts working on the notebook autismo is getting all pale
>gotta do something befor autismo passes out or worse
>rush in, tell it guy that i'll cover for him so he can take a break
>tell autismo to relax, quickly do the upgrade and shove him out of our office
>autismo is on the brink of tears, thanks me and gtfo
>he had some kind of fucked up loli porn right on his fuckin desktop
>fml
working it is fuckin horrible.
Ran a training room
Had to re-image the computers after every class
Would check internet cache before I wiped them
Had a VIP visiting from PA; cache was full of gay dating sites
Most of the time if the guy was in the back row you could see what porn sites he went to.
Women typically avoid porn but dating sites they are all over it.
>>714313830
bing bing retard detected
>>714309691
CP, PDFs/Epub files about rape, underage porn, BDSM porn, and some loli anime/hentai
>>714318005
>almost an hour later
Jokes on you. I've already recovered everything I wanted and am currently shopping around for new parts.
Glad to know that you read threads tho.
>>714318005
>bing
TRIGGERED
>>714316687
UMADBROYOLOCOMEATMEBROIBEATUDOWNWITHINONESECONDUDUMBFUCK
>>714314199
You type like a tremendous faggot
>>714316914
Thats nice, but doesnt help
I wanted to know if the law in austria is that fucked up too
I wrote a small utility that runs from a USB stick and copies any images or media files to that USB stick. It's pretty fast in a usb3 port, and looks like i'm running a virus scanner. Everybody has nudes of somebody on their computer, almost everybody tries to hide it.
A mid 30s white man, white-collar type with a ton of interracial gay porn saved to the desktop, with a particular liking to gang bangs.
>>714313001
>>714313915
>>714314719
>>714315211
>>714315445
best conversation on /b/ in quite a while.
>>714314199
>saying "shizzz"
>implying youre old enough to have a job
>>714318231
So what ?
R u a Grammar-Nazi ?
>>714317840
>finds scat porn
>doesn't make it awkward
>helps out autistic co worker
>for no apparent reason
Good on you anon
>>714314881
holy shit anon i really hope that was a step daughter.
>>714318593
STOP DOİNG THAT.
>>714318515
*shitzzzz
If u complain bout me do it right fag
>>714316549
kek
>>714318679
Why ?
Do i cant stay the fact that u r a GRAMMAR NAZI U TRIGGERED DIPSHITZZZZ
>>714318716
>u
>bout
>complete lack of punctuation
>spelled right correctly at least
>>714314440
Dickie Anders?
>>714318284
Don't ask me, don't know. IT Laws of every country are complex and it took me already several courses to get all of my countries laws.
>>714318844
I spell how i want Nazi cause im a Grammar-Comunist
>>714309691
nothing special so far
little bit of porn in browser history
but some old dude tried so fit a DVD into a ZIP drive. That did'nt go so well
An entire hard drive dedicated to a cat, around 120GB of just this one cat
>be me
>young, can't even remember how old
>PSP had come out and it was pretty big
>brother had one because he was the favorite
>borrow it like I did all of the other shit I never got
>normally just played vice city stories
>decide to poke around
>open photos
>beheld the single largest stash of pizza I have ever fucking seen
>>714317918
Me again.
I just remember another and may have some sauce though the pasta is not the best quality.
One of the company partners gets canned.
Some bs about not getting along with the majority owner
Anyway I've know this guy for some time
cool dude and sort of a freak
Ended up marrying a hooters girl (after a messy divorce; ex-wife took everything including a custom home he built)
Anon clean anon's computer and re-purpose it.
okay....
Had a music CD in the drive.
What's this in pictures?
Just a couple of poor shots of his new wife flashing and sucking cock.
Looking for sauce now.
>>714319000
>>714318679
do you even notice that this kid is trolling you ?
>>714317820
I disagree
>>714309939
hurr durr let me be le 9funny le by le riding le le bandwagon xd im funny le
>>714319318
Yeah m8 thats whut im talkin bout
U must be Grammar-Stalin gg m8
Ein zufälliger deutscher Kommentar.
>>714319498
Keksplosion
I went to this old couples (80+) home to fix their PC, I cant remember the specific problem.
Old guy answered the door, let me in and ushered me to the left, I glanced right and saw an old and not very mobile woman seated in the room opposite to where I was being guided, I nodded, she said something back.
In the computer room was this PC, This was back a few years now and it was old even by old standards, 14" CRT, FDD everything.
Anyhow, windows 95 took an age to boot and up pop loads of IS windows with gay sites after gay site after gay site, he was trying to click them away as they appeared but was probably intentionally failing. He kept asking me if I was OK and if I needed anything. He touched my shoulder a couple of times asking me if I wanted 'anything at all'.
I couldn't wait to get out of there, but I charged the old cunt £90+vat for 45 mins work, he didn't complain.
Four words
German Gas Mask Porn
>>714318360
can you share it?
>>714309691
Dumbass thought hiding his CP in System32 with changed extensions was a good plan.
Its not when I'm trying to figure out what the fuck kind of .sys files are 1-4 GB.
When he came to pick it up our new employee, Officer Mitchell, was glad to help him.
>>714319777
He cant, there is no such program that can do that.
Self executing USB is a myth.
Single mom who was 34 at the time looking up 14 year old boys on her PC. I was about 19 and she practically went ape shit on me until I gave up the cock. True story, after we fucked she said she made a mistake....I was her next door neighbor.
>>714317134
he was saving those, you know
>>714319896
dumbass
you would think he would just delete it, or at least use an external hard drive.
>>714314468
Well considering someone was dumb enough to end up with fuck tons of sand in their laptop why wouldnt they have done this
>>714319954
Runs from a usb
There's nothing stopping him from running a programme.
Learn to read.
>>714319273
fml
can't find them.
still searching
I need a picture index or something.
>be 24
>working at very small server contract manufacturer
>fat curly hair ginger girl was the document control lady
>maybe 2 years older than me
>she has computer problems
>asks me if I can take a look
>bring it home with me because my troubleshooting tools are back at my apartment
>generic malware, update programs, update Windows, system is now fine
>now time to snoop
>find a weird directory trail that doesn't make sense
>follow it
>find these folders inside
So these are the porn folders of a fat 26 year old ginger English major.
Anything you want to see?
>>714320361
you started it
>>714319696
Another time A woman in her 40's had a teenage son and got me round to look at his PC for her.
I was there about 30 seconds into the boot, when she asked me to check if there was any porn on the PC and to check the browser history.
I obliged of course, she's paying me.
Anyhow there was the normal porn any 14 year old would be looking at, no hard shit, so I told her my findings and she broke down crying.
I explained that the porn was healthy and soft and that she should be happy it wasn't gay/animal/rape porn and that she had raised a normal teenager, so is curious in all the right places.
She brightened up, paid me, I left and she probably beat the shit out of that kid.
>>714320361
sure
>>714319960
was she good looking? that doesnt sound too bad.
>>714314692
>I work at a Geek Squad
KYS. Seriously, KYS. Fuck you for selling out to Beezlebub Buy
Metric tons of images of fish. And an actual rotten fish semi glued to the motherboard.
>>714319954
I never said it was self-executing... Anyway prior to Win7 autorun.inf could be used to do just that.
>>714320361
>you want to see?
Rope ?
>>714310012
Really? I found a live baby once.
>>714320559
I don't think he had much of a say
>>714320430
maybe he was just curious, just looking at extreme stuff for the sake of it.
or maybe he had real issues
>>714320177
So you want him to share something that runs a search and copy?
May I suggest you learn simple dos and make a .bat file?
Would take me all of 1 min to write that up.
>>714320413
>>714320495
In the Colections F folder, it's just a bunch of Suicide Girls galleries.
>>714320596
I'll post some of the Rope folder next
>>714317094
And now we return to autistic shit that never happened.
>>714320216
Dammit
No hooters girl on this drive
But was asked to fix a friend's computer.
One picture of her glorious tits
Enjoy the pasta
>>714317840
you the real mvp anon
>>714320361
Inside the Rope folder.
There's a lot of weird shit in here
>>714320868
>>714320907
>>714320941
>>714320430
Why would you tell her anon? Why wouldn't you be a bro? You would have still been paid and she wouldnt know any better.
God damn.
>>714320767
Another story
Bro wanted me to fix his crapple
I was able to recover his hd by slaving it to a windows box
He was dating a redhead at the time.
More pasta
>>714314040
Should've just kept the weed.
>>714309939
>>714320965
Mooooooooot
>>714320965
>>714320941
I regret asking ...
Thank you anon
>>714321039
same thought ...
>>714321074
Just tell her, I rope you will have a nice day every time you say goodbye to her
>>714321133
Double double ... it's a sign
>>714319498
get aids
>>714320987
moar
>>714321133
I bet that was snoopdogs pc and they stole it
>>714321159
this, holly shit this
>>714321074
In the F Machien folder, there's just a bunch of short, shitty quality .wmv of fucking machines
>>714321159
HAH if I only I still worked with her. Haven't seen her in a year
>>714318675
I really hope it wasnt a step daughter and they have little mutated babies by now and voted for trump
>>714317820
>world ends due to obvious reasons
>humanity is in shambles
>as we try to rebuild society, there is no fun
>video games, gone
>movies, gone
>internet, gone
>most paper books either soggy or burned
>the only fun left is masturbation
>most sexuality has gone out the window
>people fap to inanimate objects and family
>a lucky few discover old playboys and guard them closely
>but
>whats that up there?
>it's me
>my computer, one of few not destroyed by EMPs
>solar panel powering rig
>dick out
>furiously fapping
>as others have trees and rocks and incest, I have every fetish, every rule 34 ever drawn, absolutely every porn
>while everyone is segregated on almost every issue, there is one everyone agrees on
>they all want real porn
>I use my archive of porn as currency
>for obeying my commands, a slave gets one ticket
>Tickets can be traded for porn sessions
>1 ticket for unpleasant fetishes, scat, pee, puke, etc
>5 tickets for normal porn
>10 tickets for pleasant fetishes, feet, bdsm, R34, etc
>many people flock in
>village turns to a town
>town turns to city
>city turns to state
>state turns to country
>at this point society is restored and has not needed my porn for a long time
>a monarchy is formed so I can stay in power without porn currency
>country takes over planet
>live in a perfect world happily ever after
>>714310641
Probably trying to scrub the hard drive by writing worthless files after deleting the good ones.
>>714313142
Not knowing how to do basic diagnostics, not knowing how to google. Computers are easy to fix
>>714314199
You are not Edward from cowboy bebop. What a waste of dubzzz
>>714320566
any sand?
>>714311927
thanks for the nightmares...
>>714321316
The male bondage folder
>>714313710
>Shame on him for being an anti semite in 2k16 though.
what the fuck does this even mean? why? cause we're so advanced? progressive? tolerant in 2016?
fuck you for NOT being an anti-semite(or at least anti-zionist) and racist in 2016! have you seen whats going on in the world?
a really, but really huge amount of porn.
>>714321544
ABSOLUTELY FUCKING DISGUSTING,STOP IT
>>714321212
Not much more and the quality is shit.
She was nucking futz and they split up shortly after I recovered his files.
He has had some of the hottest bitches I know living with him and fucking him.
>>714321444
Nice trips, but read threads.
Already worked around my main issue and searching for a permanent fix you autistic sperglod.
>>714314652
i go to sea for months at a time. try to watch porn on ship internet or no internet asshole
>>714319109
please do tell more
>>714309691
Saw a page in somebody's history once titled "skinny girl fucked by horse".
>>714321426
You just went full blown autismo.
>>714313746
Not really, just advertise and do it. Helps to get up to date on Microsoft licensing, don't be the weeb that installs pirated copies amd expects to get paid. Btw you can make a ton more by offering computer tutoring, if you have the patience
>>714321606
The water bondage folder
I'm not an It, i'm just good with computer, but here's my story:
>friend of a friend asks if i can recover files on a dead pc
>says there i some really important medical shit on it
>he's a surgeon
>go back home the the HD out and connect it to a working pc
>copy files on external hard disk he gave me
>start looking around for pictures
>lots of pictures of him and his team dicks out on open patients
>found him masturbating with the hand of a dead girl
>nopenopenope.jpeg
>finished the cloning ang gave everything back to him
Since then I never, never look around in pc I repair.
>>714319050
youre probably the same guy I called a virgin yesterday. virgin
>>714320767
>Enjoy the pasta
What the fuck are you talking about?
>>714321426
I'm starting my porn folder right now
>>714313028
I never save porn, no matter how good it is
>>714321931
You must be new here.
Lurk moar.
>>714319144
>be me, work at gamestop
>dude at college finds out, asks me to fix it because it's getting laggy
>know he just uses it for internet every now and then and as a shitty music player
>gf is there with him when hebhands it off
>hot as fuck and I'd consider installing malware just for a BJ from that
>open up memory card just to be safe and see it in there, 16 gigs worth....
>violate sanctity of mutual trust
>50 vids of him recording his gf making cockshame vids and her almost swallowing goddamn footlong dildos
copied it all and used that shit like partfavors when I had a dry spell.
I don't think he ever knew I did it.
>>714314881
So where are the videos?
At in laws house.
Father in law asks me to setup his printer. Open up safari to download drivers, literally a hundred tabs of porn..
I blame Safari
https://www.steamgifts.com/giveaway/SsTOO/adr1ft
enjoy everyone
The ABSOLUTE fucking worse was this guy brought in his flatlined desktop.
>No problem, I'll just switch out the power supply.
>Open case, this horrible sweet, sickening smell came out.
>THOUSANDS upon THOUSANDS of little dead cockroaches.
>Power supply, motherboard, EVERYTHING inside encrusted with the dead, living, nests, etc.
>IMMEDIATELY bag it.
>Charge him $50 for the service charge and $100 for the fucking exterminator to kill the fuckers that escaped.
>Tell him he's banned from the shop and not to let the door hit him in the ass on his way out.
I hate cockroaches.
>>714322196
You're the new one, you tard
>>714319777
Are you really going to run some random .exe some guy posted on /b ? I mean I could share it, but I wouldn't trust me.
>>714322165
This is a good practice.
So much free porn out there no reason to buy or save
Besides the old stuff always comes back around in a nostalgia thread.
>>714321846
U r wrong m8 i banged ur Mom 2 dayzzzz kekekekekekekek
>>714322196
Nobody refers to their post as pasta, you dumb cunt the phrase is copypasta
>>714322296
Ah, the classic 'put cockroaches in the computer' prank.
>>714321931
>>714322196
Let the kid learn about anatomy
>>714322341
>legit 4chan.exe
How can you not trust that?
>>714321606
and then there's a huge collection of guys in the Men folder
>>714320361
>F Machien (fucking machines)
>Water B ( not sure)
>Wemen (women)
>wet
any of hese 4, but F Machien and Wet preferred.
>>714321606
>>714314881
Did you tell anyone?
>>714320757
>suicide girls
actually kinda tasteful and pretty, but uncommon tbh.
>>714322318
>pasta =
>copy
>paste.
Rules of the internet:
22. Copypasta is made to ruin every last bit of originality
23. Copypasta is made to ruin every last bit of originality
Lurk moar newfag
>>714322341
Share the source code then. Not that anon, but interested, how you handled it to look like a anti virus scan
>>714322399
>sure is summer in here...
>>714309691
>Found a computer on the side of the road.
naked couple doing meth...
my friend wanted to turn in the picture.
we didn't... because we would have to give up the desktop... which had decent specs.
>>714315199
Big hassle to save your own skin, you mean.
>>714322557
But you claim you're posting oc...
I was fixing some pretty routine stuff on an older neighbors computer once. Right on his desktop he had a folder labeled "sailor moon slash fiction". It was exactly what you think. This guy had written over 40 chapters of a long drawn out story implanting himself in the sailor moon universe and it involved a lot of sex. I read as much as I could. Tbh it was pretty good.
>>714309691
Back when I was still studying I used to fix people computers in my neighborhood to earn some fast cash. Just the usual laptop cleanings, pc building, fresh installations, etc.
There was this time when some guy said that his laptop was slow, I said I will take a look into it. There was noting wrong with the laptop, however there was a folder right in desktop called "Jane Nudes" ( not the real name of that guy's wife). Curiosity beated me and I looked. There were hundres of pics of his wife, both nudes and fucking. There was also this zzzz folder with she fucking the guy with a strap. I just turned the laptop off and tried to forget it.
A few days later came the guy to pick the laptop. I told him there was nothing wrong. He asked me If I saw anything interesting. I just say that he shold save his very ersonal folders in places that people wouldn't look for. Then he asked if I liked what I saw.
The thing is that his wife started to beg for a threesome, and she had a thng for young men. Yes, an early 30's woman wanted me 20 years old dick and used her husban to recruit me into a threesome.
And no, I didn't join. I was kinda scared with the strapc pics they "shared" with me.
>>714322385
Some porn can't be found on stream sites, or you can find only parts of it, they are available only for download, like Max Hardcore's porn.
>>714322516
Fucking machines and Water Bondage thumbs I've posted here >>714321316
>>714321825
but they're .wmv's
I'll post some from her Women folder so you get an idea of what a fat 26 year old ginger English major finds sexy
>>714322399
>autism
>>714309939
Dank meme bro
>>714322819
>>714322623
Not knowing when to green text properly
YEAH MY CMC TRADING ACCOUNT HAS BEEN BLOCKED AFTER A NIGHT ON 4CHAN LOLZ
>>714322819
yeah sorry man, when I posted that, thread wasmoving a mile a minute.
>>714322870
>>714322960
>>714311927
Fucking animals. It's unfathomable how depraved some people are.
>>714322819
Google "WebM for Retards" and start sharing the love man.
>>714323049
>>714323085
Will consider converting them in the future
>>714314652
Because I don't feel like digging through 50 pages of internet links to find the one image that makes me diamonds when looking up "greenish blue alien virgin gets completely buttblasted by stegosaurus"
>>714309691
CP on my high-school teacher's notebook (several pics of a naked young girl), when i asked he told it was his daughter, checked later he didn't have kids. I feel bad for not going to the police.
>>714322806
I don't even know what is that, so I'm ok without Max's porn
>>714323143
>>714323214
I just named it 'scantool' and don't output anything.
Anyway if you've got a Go compiler, the source is at pastebin dot com slash KPxgXSZt
I don't know of a great anonymous upload site to put a compiled version though.
>>714323259
>>714322960
>>714323049
>tfw aesthetic autism
>tfw perfectly fine with tatted girks, but only if it looks good, not just a mess of random images in odd places
It's like drawing a picture, but putting a random skull and crossbones in a flowerpatch.
>>714323299
>>714314928
said the guy who said now power and copmputer
>>714322385
I've had enough of my favorite videos get taken down on free porn sites (copyright takedowns, not illegal) that it seems like a good idea to save the absolute best of the best. I have enough hard drive space for it, and it's turned out to be a good idea as well because some of them did, in fact, get taken down. But I still have them. I set the bar for quality very high when it comes to downloading videos, though, so I don't do it very often and usually find my porn by searching in any number of free porn sites.
Pics are another thing, though. It makes more sense for me to lurk porn threads to get pics rather than have to wait for them and hope someone posts my favorite pics to have an opportunity to see them. Saving them means I can reliably access them whenever I want, and the file sizes are relatively small. Having such a wide variety of images available at my fingertips (which are specifically quality-screened for my particular tastes) seems like the very point of fapping to pics instead of videos in the first place.
>>714323359
Ok last one from the Women folder, moving on to the Wet folder
>>714321469
underrated post
>>714323518
>>714323204
It's like every other porn you have watched. But with an old man fucking young girls pretending to be underage and forcing them to puke and piss on each other, using lots of tools to keep their mouths and pussy open. I'll post some screenshot.
>>714323185
There's 50 pages of that? Does it include duplicate links?
>>714323547
>>714323569
>>714323582
There's actually not much in this folder other than videos I haven't converted yet...
But there's all kinds of Yaoi and other degenerate material
>>714323204
>>714310012
Fucking kek'd hard.
What a show that is
>>714322715
anon was referring to other posts in the thread. anon was posting oc
>>714323646
Hmm now I'm a bit curious
>>714323185
Share that pic
where did that guy go
>>714321606
here's more of what you were asking for
>>714309691
>be 15
>fix a 18 year olds laptop cause he said he was gonna smash my face if I dont
>I snoop around in his files naturally
>find a folder full of porn
>random videos of Japanese rape
>pretty normal so far
>then I find a file called "memories"
>probably his x gf nudes me thinks
>I will never forget the shit I saw...
>over 1000 pics and something around 70 videos of him and his mother fucking
>perfectly documented with date time and something that really freaked me out
>the condoms he used every time
>I start watching some of the videos
>too late now
>I hate the guy but I cant stop but get a boner cause of this awkward shit
>every time this guy has an orgasm he screams out of his lungs
>he screams "I love you mom"
>...
>next day I give em back the laptop
>take off and after I tun the corner I scream
>"I love you mom!"
>run as fast as I can
> I can see him running after me
>feel a sharp pain
>wake up in the hospital
Dude got expelled for almost killing me, apparently he threw a metal pipe, hit me in the head and then kept bashing my head till a teacher came.
>>714321606
>>714323796
What's going on at minute 35?
>>714309691
This on my Friend's laptop
>>714323971
You handled this discovery appropriately anon.
Good work
>>714321606
anything else you want to see?
>>714323848
Usually you find some scenes of him, but the best ones aren't on stream sites, they are just too gross (he was convicted of obscenity).
>>714314336
I mean, if someone's dead set on finding my porn, they'll have no trouble finding it. I just put mine in an obscure folder so that someone casually using my computer most likely won't come across it. None of it's illegal, but some of it would be slightly awkward for a friend or relative to find. Some stranger finding it isn't a big deal to me, though.
