/b/ - you're stuck in the middle of the ocean on a life
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
/b/ - you're stuck in the middle of the ocean on a life boat with 5 people.
>a man who has the cure for cancer
>a survival expert
>a 10/10 women
>a billionaire
>your child
There's only enough room on the lifeboat for 5, and one has to go overboard. Who goes overboard?
the man with the cure for cancer
>>713669035
Selfish cunt.
>>713668934
are you fucking on the spectrum? the billionaire
>>713668934
the billionaire
throw over the child, impregnate the 10/10 woman, make another child
on another note, you're trying to mislead people into thinking that the 10/10 woman wouldnt manipulate the other dudes into protecting her from you
>>713669107
>>713669110
The billionaire has said he'll give you his fortune if he lives.
>>713668934
I punch a hole in the lifeboat and contribute to the well-being of the ocean ecosystem by providing food for fish.
>>713669034
that 10/10 woman is 3D then her,
otherwise my child.
>>713668934
bill
How old is the child?
>>713668934
Survival expert if one goes out we all go out.
>>713669134
I'm not misleading anyone. You can interpret the question however you like. It's a psychological exam.
>>713669155
still bill
>>713668934
throw over the billionaire, my kid, and the dude who has the cure for cancer.
Myself, the survival expert, and the 10/10 woman will figure shit out.
The child. I'll just make a new one with the 10/10.
>>713669219
negative 3 months old
he's a fetus in a jar
>>713668934
The most selfless answer is myself. This is what I choose.
Not just for good karma points, either. It's the best choice considering the other options. I've done nothing in 26 years on this nightmare rock; the other five people have far more potential.
Plus, apparently I have a kid--at least in this hypothetical. It'd be shitty to render him/her a potential orphan but they would understand my sacrifice when they were older.
Plus, the billionaire would set the kid off for life and if the kid was male he could bang the 10/10 "women" (it's woman you retard). Survival expert leads the rest back to safety and the cancer guy dedicates the cure in my honor.
There is no better answer.
>>713668934
The kid. Only one (aside from maybe the billionaire at that point) that can't contribute.
>>713669079
they will make another one
>>713669364
/thread
>this is the answer you are suppose to say.
>>713669364
the child would both have : your genes and a shitty parent. he has less potential than you.
>>713668934
My child. Ill make more of the little bastards.
The billionaire. But we tie him to the lifeboat in hopes of catching fish that come to eat him.
>>713668934
The billionaire.
he's literally useless.
The man with the cure for cancer can make us all billionaires, how much would people pay for the cure for cancer?
Any answer but this is retarded.
>>713669328
good idea throw it over make a mermaid child
>>713668934
Joke's on you - I'm never having a child.
>>713669328
plot twist that is the cure for cancer
>>713669725
I think my father said that as well now I have 9 other siblings
>>713669735
kek
the survival expert so i dont have competion for the 10/10
>implying 10/10 would fall into your arms
"He stared at me nonstop until we were rescued"
>>713668934
>your child
it means i'm possibly Married
a women would cause competition and is as useless as a child but with more drawbacks
rip "A 10/10 women"
tfw to smart
>>713670100
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.
>>713668934
kill the billionaire, bind arms and legs of woman, use her for stress relief, survival expert keeps everyone alive, cancer cure guy saves the world and your child carries on your legacy, of course you don't kill yourself because you're not a god damn faggot
>>713670100
Kek this point is actually not actually a bad point to be honest to have an opinion of which from.
>>713669155
Never trust a jew
>>713670554
nice sentence structure
>>713670662
I'm assuming google translate.
I sure as fuck hope so, anyway.
>>713670554
Da faq?
>>713669155
unchanged
Most selfless is me. Billionaire contributes nothing atm. Woman would manipulate because appeal. Child would cause issues due to growing up. Survival expert may get power go to head. And man with cure for cancer is key for after survival but may not contribute much. Can't choose. Best way to win is to not play. So nope to your question
>>713671484
Actually you'll never win if you don't play
>>713669155
get him to impregnate the 10/10, then throw him overboard.marry the 10/10 when we get back cuz i charmed the shit out of her during our adventure, the kid gets the inheritance, force him at gunpoint if necessary to write a will with me as the recipient of his fortune, throw him off some other boat on his next birthday, be millionaire turn 10/10 into sex slave then aquire more
>>713671721
sex slaves, that is
>>713668934
We can take turns swimming alongside the boat, holding on. Floating will help relieve some weight and allow the boat to support an extra person.
a survival expert...because I'm a survival expert
>>713671885
No, you're not. You're human scum and the world would be much better off without you.
>>713672150
nice meme
>>713669079
Tb needs to go
>>713669155
You're suppose to kill jews, not trust them
>>713672326
Is that a meme?
>>713672445
my life is a meme
>>713672485
all of life is a meme
>>713668934
Isn't the man who has the cure for cancer actually more of a survival expert than the actual survival expert?
*hits blunt*
>>713672548
The president is a meme
>>713672630
O.o
>>713668934
>Cut off everyone's legs to make more room
>Now also have food
>Nobody goes overboard
>Get new terminator legs when back on mainland
>>713672630
no because cure for cancer dont keep him from getting raped to death by animals
you fags all got it wrong.
the answer is: cut off cancer guy's legs, cut off your child's arms & decapitate the 10/10 womyn. now there is space for everyone and you get to bond with your now armless child and the billionaire over triple-teaming the 10/10 womyn's headless body while laughing at the faggy science nerd who'll cure cancer and stare into his faggot eyes as you ejaculate directly into her lungs through the neck hole and give your son a firm congratulatory pat on the ass for losing his virginity to a tight 10/10 rigor mortis butthole while you wait for rescue :^)
Thot patrol sorry girl
>>713672924
wow that edge hurt just to translate, i can't even imagine how painful it must have been for you to type it in between mouthfuls of hot pockets and mountain dew
>>713673020
kek
>>713668934
If I'm already in the boat with the other 5, how is that there is no room for more than 5?
>>713668934
So how is the guy with the cure to cancer going to kill you?
>>713668934
the woman
>>713668934
the woman has no use but to e hot and she'd e disgusted if i got rid of any of these people, but not the reverse. and even if the reverse is true, it'd still e positive in the end.get rid of the 10/10
>>713672865
This is where your child will come in handy.
>>713670385
>tfw to smart
>to
>>713668934
My child, 5 adults are best than 4 and 1 child
>>713673544
yea but its hard to rail my kid with a gorilla dick in my face
>>713670385
sound logic, I agree.
me, because I'm a cuck
>>713673750
How the hell did the gorilla end up in the boat in the first place? Is it perhaps.. a watergorilla?
The woman. She's a 10/10... she's had a good life of being catered to completely. Nothing but pretty-girl problems.
>On a boat with five people
>theres only room for five people
Your scenario is flawed
>OP is a fag
>>713674338
either memeing or dumb
I go of course, I've always wanted to try to kill myself
>>713674132
You are clearly a faggot.
Lose the kid. Dbl win.
The cash the billionaire might give you might get you a 10/10 and she definitely ain't fucking you when there's a survival expert/billionaire/soon to be new messiah of mankind on board
>>713668934
The billionaire. not like he'll give us any of the money anyways
>>713668934
Fuck the child, perfect situation to get rid of him
>>713674676
agreed
The woman. She's not the only 10/10 in the world.
>>713673020
>implying he was being serious
>implying he wasn't trying to be funny
>bringing back implications
>>713668934
The woman, she has so much plastic in her tits that she floats.
Fuck the 10/10 girl. Literally, then push her off. If you all survive and the billionaire gives you each a reward for helping save him you'll be rich. Rich people always end up with attractive women anyway and you can live knowing you helped save lives by helping indirectly cure cancer
>>713674860
This, except someone in a boat full of men will raise hell.
Her or the billionaire, for sure. You're not getting his money, and you're not getting her pussy, so what good are they?
>>713669364
Pathetic
>>713669034
This. However, some anons raise a good point. The woman is 10/10.
But in what regard? Is she like a twinkie, or is she smart as well? What does she do? What will she do? How badly will she fuck things up if she stays? How mentally stable is she on a raft with 3 men and a child in the middle of nowhere?
How mentally stable is anyone?
Does the survival expert even know how to survive on the ocean, on a lifeboat, with nothing but said lifeboat and said people and said ocean?
Notwithstanding that, I think I would still go. Dying because of human error and shitty human psyche and whatnot is just shitty, and not worth the while. I'd rather die on my back in the middle of the ocean, rocked gently as I am burned by UV rays and probably dragged under the surface by a predator. I'm not really expecting much out of life, especially if I find myself in such a situation where I am lost at sea, with no real guarantee for rescue, with 5 other people including my child. I might very well be someone who goes to do something marginally worthwhile in their lives- like have a child. I suppose, just from my expectations and cynicism, I expect something to go wrong in a situation where people panic and become dumb, which may render the whole hope of rescue worthless if someone fucks up the raft- or decides using sun-fried logic, that you should be eaten first.
So, again, it would be time to feed the sharks and scream Wilson in delirium. Also, because most people would suggest that it is the selfless thing to do.
>>713668934
Throw over the survival expert
>mfw I am also a survival expert
>>713675322
You can't be a survival experts. There can't be two survival experts, it's against the rules. You're a down on your luck father who took his young child on the adventure of a lifetime. However, what you didn't intend on was being part of a shipwreck and stuck on a life boat with 4 polar opposites.
>>713675322
same though
>>713669079
Cancer is just natural selection. A proper diet and balanced pH will prevent nearly every type of cancer that does not stem from a specific environmental toxin, or radiation.
Ever meet a fit person with stomach/liver/thyroid cancer? Sure you get skinny after you start chemo, but thats just cause people lose weight when theyre actively dying. You might have seen a few exceptions, but its 90% obese, sugar addicted, inactive people.
Just gonna tell everyone to puke 3 times, we'd lose enough weight, probably more than the child's
>>713675927
It doesn't work like that ffs. Stick to the fucking rules or fuck off outta this thread.
>>713668934
How am I stuck on a life boat only big enough for 5 people that currently has 6 people in it? If it can't fit the 6th person they'd never have gotten on. If anyone would have to go it would be the person to get on last.
The first would he the billionaire who cares more for his own life.
The second would be the woman as somebody would bring some kind of bullshit chivalry into it.
Third would be my child who would go right before me.
Fourth would be me.
Fifth would be the man with the cure for cancer, who would most likely have used his knowledge of a cure as an excuse to survive, claiming that if he does survive he'll cure cancer.
The survival expert would most likely be last to get on as he would have helped everyone else onto the lifeboat before realising there was no room for himself.
To be honest though in this situation I probably would have pushed the selfish billionaire off to let the survivalist on. All 5 of us would be rich anyway after we tell our story.
I'm fun at parties as you can tell.
>>713675710
I know 2 who never smoked, rarely drank, good diets and good excersise. One dies from bone, other from brain
>>713668934
Torn between tossing out the cure for cancer or the useless bimbo. Cancer helps keep the population down tbh.
this question doesn't make sense how are the 6 of us stuck on this lifeboat to begin with if there is only enough room for 5?
the survival expert. I am already a survival (((expert)))
>>713676300
Did they ever get vaccines?
Checkmate.
>>713668934
Billionaire
>tfw I have the cure for cancer
>tfw I am a survival expert
>tfw I am a 10/10 woman
>tfw I am a billionaire
>tfw I am my own son
Kill them all I have everything I need
If any answer other than throwing the 3DPD overboard, even with "muh 10/10", then you're doing it wrong
>>713677040
If u masturbate, isn't that incest?
all these people claiming they are survival experts probably don't even know how to tie a poop loop
The women goes over, you know what they say, there's plenty of other fish in the sea.
The government already has several cures for cancer so i would throw the cure guy overboard
>>713668934
obviously the billionaire
>>713669364
>look at me
>Im a total fag
>Ill totally suck yer cock
keep playing "imagination time" you little worthless fat sack of cuban cum.
You would cry and bitch and moan and whine about how unfair Vishnu is for allowing you to suffer on a boat in the middle of the ocean.
They would probably throw you're worthless chink dick having tripple nipple ass out before you could even do anything.
>>713678392
stfu queer i'll punch ur mom in the cunt
>>713679067
Kek
>>713668934
>middle of ocean
>lifeboat
You would be dead unless u where magically found or people knew your general area and where actively looking.
If it was a "stay alive for 3 days and make it" situation i would say the survival expert.
Everyone would just have to take off clothes and build a tent like cover over it too avoid the sun and drink their own piss. Billionaire would go over, why do i care about him.
>>713669364
>being this beta
throw over the billionaire or the bimbo.
>>713668934
have everyone take turns swimming one at a time?
>>713669662
Wrong. The woman and child are useless. The billionaire is statistically the most likely to be useful besides the survival expert.
I'd throw the child off, woman for breeding just incase.
>have guy with cure explain what it is
>push him along with everyone else off
>use cure to become billionaire
>get 10/10 trophy wife
>have kid
>>713668934
woman will stay there doing nothing because everything it is all down to her, while we men will work hard till we go back to the civilization. So more than being a killtime she won't be anything else in this situation.
>kill the woman
>gay sex all the way to the civilization
>pedogay sex avaiable to contribute my own part
>>713668934
>and one has to go overboard. Who goes overboard?
I'd like to throw out all but my child.
It's a goddamn lifeboat, you're gonna die, might as well have some fun before you go.
>>713679546
well, here is how the billionaire could factor in.
With his wealth, surely there would those who would pay top dollar to find him as soon as possible? bam.
>>713668934
what the fuck is the billionaire dude going to give me? money because we survived? the fuck? and it's not like anyone's going to fuck the woman on a boat that fits 5 people? they're both useless
>>713677346
>Tfw my inner child comes out as I ejaculate
>TFW CPS takes my inner child away
>>713669183
Kek
>implying we didn't already cook my child as food for survival.
>>713675710
Terry fox
/checkmate
>>713668934
The billionaire
"Life of Pi" .. alone in a lifeboat with a tiger for weeks.. Good book, nice movie
>>713668934
It depends. Are we allowed to tie the person to the rear mooring hitch? (That way they won't drown and they stand a decent chance of surviving, provided sharks aren't around in which case the rest of us get free entertainment)
Actually, it doesn't really matter. the billionaire is going overboard, everyone else serves some purpose. This assumes the billionaire isn't offering me a bribe. If he is, then the 10/10 woman is going overboard,
>>713668934
Guy with the cure for cancer, any sane pharmaceutical company will have him off'd by the time he gets home.
>>713670647
/thread
>>713668934
bilionare - it is useless
I'f I'm already on the lifeboat with them, how is there only room for 5 people?
>>713669239
The survival expert will fuck the chick and you will be a cuck
>>713668934
>Throw survival expert in the ocean
>He is an expert at survival
>He traps a dolphin with his pants and uses his shoelaces to tie it to the boat
>He makes the dolphin pull you back to land
>Drinks his own piss the whole way
>He is a legendary hero for his sweet rescue
>Later someone shows pictures that reveal it all happened in a backyard swimming pool
Throw the billionaire overboard. Sell the cure for cancer for billions.
Throw out everyone but me and my kid.
Survival expert?
We're in the middle of the fucking ocean!
Chuck the survival expert overboard and get the billionaire to call someone from his satellite phone or activate his homing beacon or whatever the fuck else he has a contingency plan. He's a fucking billionaire there's already someone looking for him and by extension us.
Extort the billionaire for a place. From there just see what I can get out of everyone for a place on the boat.
>>713675710
healthy people die of cancer
everybody gets cancer, but most of the time the body deals with it before it causes any trouble
eventually one comes along and the body doesn't catch it, so it becomes malignant.
the rate of prostate cancer in men over 80 is 100%
>>713668934
Force man to give me cure to cancer then feed his ass to sharks
>MFW he would probably be more famous dead anyways
bribe the billionaire and throw the woman. survival expert can help us survive, billionaire has my money, my kid has like 50 more years to live and all kids need dads. the woman is the only person in this situation that wouldn't be helping us
The survival expert is mandatory, the cancer dude is useful for the everybody and anyone that says to throw him is an edgy dick. The billionaire can give you lots of money and after this you'll probably end as friends so having a billionaire friend is pretty good. You can't throw out the kid as probably all of them will hate you for it plus it's your kid. So the only uselss people there are the chick and yourself. But the chicks only good trait is her holes. Since she's a woman she's useless as fuck and would probbaly even fuck things up. You on the other hand could potentially help if needed, plus the kid needs a father. So the only good and logical choice here is to throw the chick out.
My child... What a dumb question
My child. Like bitch I can just make more...
>>713668934
Fuck the kid, whiny little bastard
The survival expert because I am one and could live without him
>>713668934
I'd get rid of 3 people
>Woman (there are plenty of them)
>Cancer cure man (Take the cure off him, throw him over. Besides they already have a cure they don't release because it's not profitable for the drug industry)
>My Child (If I've raised a child it's going to end up an even bigger fuck up than me)
>>713668934
Rape the 10/10 then throw her overboard.
>a man who has the cure for cancer
He's clearly a conman anyway. There are plenty of curse for cancer, there just isn't one that cures every kind of cancer.
>>713668934
Survival expert, because my 10/10 is a survival expert.
>>713668934
Need more information
Off the bat I say the "10/10 woman" is likely my choice but I'd have to know things like, is the billionaire nice or have any reason other than money to be kept alive? How old is everyone? And all sorts of other exposition.
>>713668934
The women
She doesn't help and would jump the billionaire or the survival expert anyway
>>713668934
Obviously the 10/10 woman. Who is to say anything will happen with me and her, or that she is useful in any way?
>>713671721
underated
>>713673103
The boat I taking on water/you're not on the lifeboat yet you're on a sinking ship. That's not the part of the question you are being asked to solve.
>>713680493
...think about what you just said and the situation that would occur..
>>713668934
In all honesty I'd kill us all trying to save everyone. Let fate make the choice.
But for purposes of the test I'd kill the survival expert since survival is baked into the question. I apparently don't need the expert to tell me we need to lose someone.
>>713669364
>the billionaire would set the kid off for life
How do you figure? It would be a stretch for him to say that he owed you anything,
>>713694660
you're a moron. kill the billionaire
money ain't shit on the ocean
sorry bruh u a nobody now
BAM BAM WHACK, SPLASH
>>713692929
A 10/10 woman is one who has everything you want; looks, brains, personality, and will be with you. If she isn't perfect for you specifically she is not a 10/10.
>>713669226
survival expert has probably watched Bear Grylls too much toss him
>>713668934
the woman, how is this even a question
>>713669079
There's no profit in cure
>>713694774
Until we get back to land and I'm convicted of murder.
Myself. I just want it all to end already
>>713668934
10/10 woman goes out
>>713675710
Every people I know that died of cancer was fit.
>>713668934
Depends.
Is it a scenario where we're rescued or not?
If we're eventually rescued, then probably the woman, if her only trait is that she is attractive, then she has no worth whatsoever, Cure for cancer is important, billionaire has an impact on the economy, and a child is always prioritized in safety, so it would be a pick between me and her, being at least somewhat intelligent and competent, if attractiveness was her only trait she would have nothing to offer, if she was equal to me in all other fields than it would be me as she, being attractive, clearly would deserve to go on due to her superior genetic makeup.
if we would never get rescues, the scenario branches into two possibilities.
1: We die on the boat.
Doesn't matter who gets tossed we all die on the fucking boat, offer to help everyone be put out of their misery, then kill them all one by one, leaving the woman for last so we could have sexy time before I kill her then myself.
2: We end up on an uninhabited island and can live out our lives there.
The billionaire would get tossed. Man with the cure for cancer would doubtlessly have some medical expertise, a survival expert, along with my own survival knowledge would increase our chances of survival at the start, again child's safety is to be prioritized, and the woman would be required for procreation.
I am the survival expert
>>713669035
Definitely this.