Secrets / Advice and Vent thread
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Secrets / Advice and Vent thread
There is this shy girl that I am interested in.
She never texts first, but will talk for hours if I message her. Including some personal stuff.
Wonder, if there is a way to try to break down the wall preventing her from texting me
What could I do with her? Maybe try bringing up the fact of her not messaging first?
Something similar to this?
"I've noticed that you never seem to text first. Is there any reason why?"
Bump
Never seen one of these at this time, so whatever.
> Have 100GB Truecrypt container with very questionable porn
> including multiple videos of myself masturbating with things in my ass over the last 6 years or smth, also nudez of exes etc.
> fooled around with male friends at age of 10-12
Well..
>>712901928
no, please don't do that cringe overload. Maybe she likes you but is insecure or she's not that into you. There's no set reason for any behavior. Perhaps just say something like "You can always talk to me" which leaves the invitation open, but doesn't put any pressure on her
>>712903227
That is possible.
It is more so based of some advice of what a female friend said to do in this situation
am i doing it right?
bump
I had a relationship with my teacher on highschool she was really hot
I'm gay
I get off to little girl pussy.
Here's some legal advice for anyone who gets in trouble (in the US) with computers.
Go buy a shitty burner laptop, then hand over that one. If they don't know the model, and just come in for a seizure, and you chunk your old one, then you're safe. Destroy the HDD, buy a new one, and hand over the cheap burner one.
Read the fucking warrant in it's entirety before letting them enter your property. If they barge in and don't let you read the warrant, then you can counter-suit for breaking your 4th and 5th amendment rights.
If they try to take anything that's NOT on the warrant, instantly lawyer up, and push hard. They will be forced to drop charges if it's found that they secured evidence that wasn't on the warrant. There's some free legal advice.
Lastly, DENY EVERYTHING. DENY DENY DENY.
t. Lawfag
>>712903501
Yeah women ask that kind of shit all the time, but it's part if the reason guys think women are "crazy"
>>712902152
I fooled around with male friends from a certain age before puberty. Never once felt gay or weird about it, was just a kid exploring his sexuality, and plus they have to say the same thing. I wouldn't let it get to you.
Posting for advice.
I just got an insanely attractive gf a few days ago. She says she wants to blow me.
She doesn't know it but I'm a dicksuckless virgin. Most I've ever done is make out with some girl. Also I have a tiny dick. How do I make the experience not awkward and disappointing?
On several occasions I've had sex in the missionary position with my wife for the purpose of procreation.
I wish I was white.
>>712905151
YouTube my friend. Taught me how to do my first kiss
>>712905151
Just lay back and enjoy yourself.
>>712905225
Damn right you do.
>>712905230
Thx mang. Incognito mode here I come
I havent fapped in 2 weeks.
>>712905151
Don't over think it to much, get foreplay on the go and just roll with it
>>712905167
Any luck Anon?
>>712905297
Fucking pol/ has ruined me.
I really want to experience an ultra-hot girl farting in my face. I know it would smell bad, I know I wouldn't like it. But, it wouldn't kill me, and the slightly dominating aspect of it I think would turn me on boatloads. Not saying I'd make a thing out of it, just that it'd be nice to learn through experience whether it'd be something I'd enjoy or not.
>>712904911
I suppose.
I just really wish to get this kick started, so hopefully it can lead somewhere.
It does kinda seem like she might have some interest, but is very shy and possibly socially anxious. (Only has a handful of friends, and treats the professor as a friend. She did say that "I am just coming out of my shell")
And she probably knows that I am into her
>>712905299
No problem.
Also learned how to change the oil in my car, and switch from a HDD to an SDD from YouTube as well. It's a father, friend, and guide. Happy trails!
I blew up 9/11
>>712905338
Anyone else no fap?
I spent my good boy points on crayons and now my mummy won't give me more
No girl looks at me. I mean, I can make them laugh and shit, but they don't like me before even seeing me.
>>712905299
>Incognito
something about that word always gets me
it sounds like some faggot in a cape and a mask trying to impress girls by being mysterious
>I can't tell you my name m'lady, I'm *swirls cape* incognito
>>712905750
Kek
My main fetish is guys jacking off to the thought of me
>>712905630
I do. I get cranky and irritable the rest of the day when I do. It's literally the best part of my day. Nothing that happens will top blowing my load to exactly the kind of shit I wanna be watching while it happens. I don't give a shit what people say about it being pseudo-science, it's my life and it makes a hella difference when I don't. That being said, I fap occasionally to keep from going crazy, just try not to make a habit of it, you know, like you should do for most things and is actually fairly normal.
Ok, I think I'm ready for the hate brigade.
Sometimes I order 3 pizzas to my house and pick off all the toppings, put them in a containers, fill with water and stack them in the back of my freezer. Then I take the solid block of cheese, bacon and mushrooms and shit and throw them at Muslims
>>712905809
guy or grill?
I'm 34 but still look 22-26
I never lie about my age but put it off as much as possible til a girl really gets to know me
>Current girlfriend is only 20
>>712905996
Good lad.
my memory is so shit, if I had any secrets I wouldn't remember them to post them here
I crucify niggers on flaming crosses
2nd year at college, pretty much failing all my classes because I never go to class since I fucked up my body clock taking so many night shifts at work to help pay for college. Haven't told anyone, no idea what I ought to do at this point.
I derailed a train because of a rock I pushed onto a track
>>712901248
I once buyed a raw chicken from the supermarket. You know the ones, where head is removed and you have a hole??? I fucked that. I fucked a dead chicken's neck and it felt pretty good.
Happy Thanksgiving
>>712906260
Drop out, save money, get counselling and then go back
>>712906290
I double dip
>>712906290
>You know the ones, where head is removed and you have a hole???
you mean like all of them?
also
>buyed
This is my first thanksgiving without my mom. I miss her so much
>>712906525
sorry for your loss, anon
>>712906519
Yeah, a nomal raw chicken.
>>buyed
???
I took a shit on a passed out hobo
>>712906623
>>>buyed
>???
you mean "bought"?
also what does a chicken have to do with it being thanksgiving?
>>712906290
>fucked a dead chicken's neck and it felt pretty good
At age 11 I had my 12 y.o cousin stick his dick in my butt, I had no idea what he was trying to do since I was ignorant of those things until I was 13, but now that I understand it the memory of having gay anal sex with my cousin haunts me up to this day
>>712905784
you asshole he's wearing round spectacles with a fedora
>>712906552
Thank you...
>>712906732
that too
>>712906688
Checked the double dubs
Ahh fuck grammatic.
Don't know. People are eating Turkey and stuff. That's why
>>712904895
Thank you lawfag!
>>712905413
And it's not like she obviously is not into me, but is in that area of limbo, where it is possibly either option.
>She is shy, and kinda doesn't acknowledge me unless I say something, then we can talk for a good while without issue. This is even when it is just us standing next to each other before class.
>I have seen her looking at me from a distance, sometimes locking eyes. (Once she began to crack a smile)
>When I asked for her number, she took my phone and punched it in. (It was the actual number, obviously)
>When I asked her to grab lunch the first time, she said she was busy that weekend, so I offered up Monday, which she accepted.
>>712901248
I started this meme, because i found it on FB
Tell your niggers to go sing about it.
What the fuck is this
>>712906957
Fuck you.
I am constantly bombarded with memories of every stupid, cringey, rude, or mean thing I've ever said or done.
>>712907122
that's jeff goldblum
A few years ago me and my wife when me and my wife were still dating we tried swinging for the first time ever. Turned out we were tricked and the couple we were swinging with was actually a male who hired a prostitute to be his wife.
>>712906290
Bet that shit made your willy pretty damn chilly
>>712906525
Stop digging for emotional support.
>>712905299
>not using Private Window in Firefox
>>712907357
Sorry
Girlfriend broke up with me and wanted to go back to her emotionally abusive boyfriend who drinks and smokes quite often. She started blaming me for ruining her life when I was the one that got her out of that in the first place. I deeply care about her but do not know what I should do about it.
Any advice /b/?
>>712906260
Where are you from? Apply for academic concession.
>>712907561
Stop getting so easily attached to people, especially women.
>>712907561
They obviously have so co-dependant abusive relationship. Not much you can do, if she wants fuck herself up like that then let her.
>>712906867
>pedo detected
>>712907561
nothing you can do, you can't save people. just one of those sad facts of life.
24 y/o virgin.
Not entirely unpopular with women. Rejected a few. Asked a few out on tinder and never talked to them after they said yes.
I have no idea what I'm doing.
When I'm in college I eat lunch in the toilet. I can't eat in public.
I haven't worked a single day in my life and I want to kill myself because I'm leeching my parents.
I actually tried to off myself once. Ironically, I was on lexapro at the time. Never told this to my therapist.
I don't want a girlfriend because I would have to bring it home and I'm ashamed of the place I live in. I've been telling myself to wait until I get a job, but this when I finish college, and I'm a retard so there is no hope for me.
I asked my therapist if I am autistic. She said no. It means I'm just a retard.
Until I was 20 I always took my glasses off before fapping because I was worried there may be a hidden camera like in that Tom Cruise movie.
I still take my glasses off when I take a shit.
My dad called my mother recently. Apparently he was on the verge of tears. He said that I spend all my time locked in my room and I ignore his existence. I didn't even notice that I did that.
He told me the life I live is not a life. Talked about this with my therapist. She doesn't see a problem with it, she believes I have my own way of being happy that is different from others. I don't really know what to do.
I'm not sure if I love my parents. I don't know what love is. Their existence is convenient. I would miss them if they were gone, but does that mean I love them?
We have free college where I live. On top of that, I don't work. I don't have an excuse for being a failure. When I fail, I realize that I am a low-quality human being. Even if I eventually pass, the fact that I tried so hard it may mean that I should do something easier, like having a normal people job or shit.
Pretty sure I have foot fetish.
I am extremely into hardcore chain/metal bdsm. I just want to capture a bunch of girls, chain them up and force them to suck my cock and fuck their asses with hair pulling involved. Do I have a problem?
>>712901248
I almost fucked my little sister
I've been attracted to her since we were in high school (we're only a year apart and she has always had an amazing body) and got really drunk with her one night and found out she was attracted to me as well. She ends up sending me a bunch of sexy pics that night at my request but nothing really happens. Fast forward a couple weeks, she takes a bunch of Adderall with a friend which makes her super horny and she texts me that she wants to fuck me when I get home from work. I ended up chickening out and telling her I wasn't feeling good when really I didn't want things to get awkward between us plus I dunno if I'd really enjoy it as anything more than a fantasy. Still kinda wish I would've gone through with it, we haven't talked about it since and just act like the conversations never happened.
>>712907825
Rip
>>712907825
i've heard incest is pretty common. plus you didn't do it so whatevs.
>>712907800
for fucks sake anon get a grip of yourself
jesus.
also get a new therapist, the one you have is shit
>>712907809
Would you actually do it or is it a fantasy?
>>712903501
>getting advice on females from female friends
You don't ask a fish how to catch a fish. There are exceptions to this, but generally, when a girl gives you advice on how you should approach a different girl, she's thinking about how SHE would want to be approached by a tall, dark and handsome 10/10, not you.
>>712908021
Like if it wasn't illegal and shit hell yeah
>>712907674
>>712907730
>>712907747
You guys are right. Thank you.
Makes my decisions far easier.
>>712908062
Well...it is. Would roleplaying suffice?
I graduated college class of 2016 and now live at home while I look for a job that's not at the pizza place I work at. What should I be doing with my time?
In other words, if you were in my situation, living at home with parents and stoner brother, what would you be doing?
>>712908146
Probably. Thing is I'm scared I can't have a normal relationship.
>>712908172
Fapping Fapping and more Fapping
>>712908001
>for fucks sake anon get a grip of yourself
not sure how to interpret this
>also get a new therapist, the one you have is shit
I stopped therapy almost a year ago. I have plans to go the psychiatrist again because I need sleeping pills.
I once spent three months as a crossdressing sex slave for a wealthy tech expert.
He paid for me to live with him and dress like a teenage girl so he could fuck my mouth and ass each night.
I would have done it for free - but I was getting paid three times more than my previous job.
>>712906066
yes
Bumperino
>>712908172
Be honest what you expect from your life. But not to other people, be it to yourself. Take the education which is neccessary to achive. I always made plans for worst case situations (which is exhausting) and hoped for the best. With that opinion you'll never reach your highest goal, but you'll reach something good. Higher as expected.... ;)
>>712908332
no i was asking which you were
i have a foot fetish so i conviced my best friend (she is a girl) that i find it cute when she sends me selfies with her feet in them so i have unlimited faping material
>>712907800
Take the next year off to go hermit mode, and just improve yourself.
1. Get in better physical shape (not /fit/ standards) just better than what you're at right now.
2. Leave 4chan, it's terrible for people with depression and insecurities and it sounds like you've got it all.
3. Work your way up to being able to do things in public, it sounds like that's the most crippling thing you've got.
4. Don't even worry about the love stuff, it'll make more sense once you've got a hold on YOUR OWN life.
My friendship with some of my newer friends when started out had an element of roasting each other and making shitty jokes about each other, etc.
Sometimes we even nagged each other regarding stuff we do in a bit rude manner.
I can get and appreciate jokes like that now and then, however nowadays the guys are constantly nagging me with shit and there is scoffing. I'm also a lot less interested in shit like that nowadays, less than before.
Honestly, I'm a very easy going guy who likes to talk bullshit with friends for a good laugh and I'm not afraid of using profanities. Most of my friends get this. I respect peoples opinions though, so I usually talk with everyone the way they still feel comfortable talking with me.
Yet, the situation with my friends described above is on.
I think I either misjudged them and I was too rude or nagged them too much and they want "revenge" or maybe they they thought I'm some kind of uber-alpha and now that they know that I'm generally a calm, kind guy they want to turn the tables so to speak to show off their "power".
Another idea I got is that they are jealous for some reason.
I mean it's annoying and I'm fine with the harden up and don't give a shit attitude, but I want a more mature (and possibly pleasant) solution.
Any advice /b/ros?
>>712908280
Stories like this make me want another crusade
Also, who was it?
>>712908847
How does she not figure it out?
>>712908995
i guess maybe its not that common to have a foot fetish and probably cause im so deep in the friendzone she doesn't think I'm fapping with her.
>>712908992
This kind of stuff is tough, and it's never gonna go away, the way I deal with it is just to ignore ribbing, or laugh at it when it's funny, and then go about it.
For me, sometimes I do have to call it out, but I never do that publicly, and I rarely do it anyways. I had a friend who in the group chat revealed some kinda shitty stuff about me, and so I sent him a text and asked him if he needed to hammer the point in so much, and we talked about it later. But we're pretty mature people, so IDK how it is for you and your pals.
>>712908866
>1. Get in better physical shape (not /fit/ standards) just better than what you're at right now.
I'm in fairly good shape, I think.
I go walking to and back form college to have at least some exercise. About 8km a day. I stay away from sweets and eat fruit. The only thing is that I drink a lot of diet coke.
Getting better would be getting /fit/. Not sure if I want that.
>2. Leave 4chan, it's terrible for people with depression and insecurities and it sounds like you've got it all.
I come and go from time to time. Haven't posted here in months.
>3. Work your way up to being able to do things in public, it sounds like that's the most crippling thing you've got.
Agreed. That's why I always try do as many presentations in lectures as I class. I suck hard at them, but they improve some of my public stuff.
>4. Don't even worry about the love stuff, it'll make more sense once you've got a hold on YOUR OWN life.
OK.
but
>Take the next year off to go hermit mode
Can't do that. I'm too old for that. I don't want to keep leeching my parents. If I am not working at least I should be studying.
I've been fucked by a half dozen dogs and if it wasn't made illegal since then I would still do it at every chance I get.
well there is a girl i have liked for a while i told her how i feel but just by saying like "oh, i like you" she has been on and off with her bf and I never really built up the courage,we dont talk often but i always hang out with her. Help?
i wanna roll, should i?
>>712908993
why does it make you so angry? I was happy, he was happy, and I was getting $3k a month.
He worked for a major tech firm designing laptop parts and playing the stockmarket and I cooked and sunbathed by the pool.
At night I'd cuddle with him in front of the tv, resist his advances a little, then ride his brains out.
>>712907800
Procrastination, anxiety, depression... these are the things I see in your post. Maybe early schizo stuff.
Honestly go the gym and start reading/studying something you really like even if you do it in your free-time.
Apart from that switch therapists, you aren't retarded. You should receive proper care for this kind of shit. If you're a man have a male therapist, that's the ideal stuff make sure you do that and don't think of therapy as something for degenerates only.
All this also made you incredibly insecure.
Try to adopt an approach to life which goes like this (some self-help tier stuff might help - write this shit down and read it before going to sleep):
"I'm this man now. I'll improve myself which is a journey till death. However as improvement slowly happens in every moment I'm only the man existing in that moment. That man, me has certain internal, external, financial, etc. values. They make me the man I am and that makes me valuable and unique even if sometimes I feel the opposite way. I'll seek the companionship, friendship, love of people who accept me as I am and are good for my mental and physical health . People who contribute only negativity aren't welcome and I won't care about them. When I get upset about these people I won't give an extreme reaction instead I'll trust myself to think it through properly in my own way taking my time. My intuition will know what's right. When I think I have unreal thoughts I'll stop following it through even if I think that my false conviction is real I'll test it first. I won't believe anything without proper evidence or enough reason, especially If I think it's my mind playing with me. I won't obsess about my health; I believe that my body is trying to maintain optimum physical and mental health and it doesn't need me worrying, however I'll actively support this process if necessary by consulting with professionals. I'll remember these guidelines."
I've been married since 2012 and it feels like the love is dying on my side of things. I just don't feel the same way as she does.
I love a woman at my work. We get along, even have brunch on weekends. I don't think she thinks of me as dating potential, nor do I think she thinks there could be an "us". But I'm afraid to pull the trigger on my marriage and risk it for the girl at work, because 1. My wife physically is easily a 10... and although we only fuck around twice a month, it's worth it. 2. Finances / splitting up everything, and 3. The risk of being alone for the rest of my life.
I have an urge of taking creepshots of some of my closets friends.
>>712909401
Indeed. It feels like stuff is more competitive between us than with some of my other friends. For some reason I get upset quite easily when they nag or scoff me. I don't lose my shit. it just upsets me.
I only tried to subtly change things. Sometimes I do give a retarded response though roasting myself a bit.
Anyway the thing is I have friends who aren't like that at all.
My newer friends are the guys I met at university. So these guys are close to me in our dorm and it's a shit switch in atmosphere when I go to the dorm and stuff suddenly gets "competitive".
There are some differences in thought between us, but I don't think that's the problem. This is something a bit different.
My fear is that they might think that this is what I want and they try to match me in something I actually don't want.
I think I'll push my opinion regarding this harder and possibly have a talk with them.
>>712911401
Do it faggot. But...dont get caught.
>>712911827
Yeah, it's 1 year and a half that I have been taking creepshots of them and never got caught. A lot of fap material.
>>712911401
who doesn't?
>>712901248
I troll on craigslist when I'm bored
I havent had sex in 4 years
>>712911535
Good rule of thumb is, if you know you're in the right, fight like hell, if you think you might lose a fight/argument/roast battle, ignore or move on quickly.
>>712910287
The fact that this shit is going on behind closed doors and that regular people I see walking around in daylight are doing shit like this is disgusting and undesirable.
The only argument you can defend yourself with is, it's not hurting anyone. So, if the only thing in your value system is making sure no one's hurt, then you're in the clear, but I think it's disgusting, primal, and insane.
>>712912222
the fucking quads are real
>>712912222
Did you're uncle stop now that you turned 16
>>712911056
Have more sex with your wife, have more fun with your wife, if this is hard with your schedule then make it a priority to do more fun things.
Jesus, dude, you're lucky you got yourself a 10, don't fuck it up, most guys get stuck with a 6 or below.
I've been cucking my friend for the past few years. I was hesitant at first but he seemed to genuinely wanted it. Recently this summer, his girlfriend came over without him and we had sex. She told me it was alright but it turns out he didn't know. She came clean and told me she liked me. Now I can't stop thinking about his girlfriend....
I'm fucked.
>>712907327
Yeah desu
>>712906926
Holy shit bro, I'm in the exact same boat, like I'm not entirely sure what to think though because now it seems like things are dying off, she responds less but will still talk a lot to me before and after class, I'm just as lost as you.
>>712906290
>fucked a dead chicken's neck and it felt pretty good
>>712912429
Yeah man... that's why I'm so hesitant on everything. Honest? The girl at work? Solid 6... maybe if she adjusted her diet a bit, a 7/8. But her personality clicked with mine instantly. She understands me, she gets it. But... then I go home and see my wife in yoga pants. Jesus.
I've known this girl ever since I was a kid I've fallen for her but she lives in a different part of the country because I moved away when I was about 12.
I go up an visit her once every couple of months now but I don't know how to come clean to her. Watch do?
>>712910466
Thank you for your advice.
>Honestly go the gym and start reading/studying something you really like even if you do it in your free-time.
I used to play classical violin and piano in my free time. I started violin when I was 20, and piano 1 year ago. I kinda stopped doing it because everyone, including many violinists, told me this is the kind of thing you can't get very far unless you start as a child. Playing in group was fun, probably the most enjoyable activity this year, but since I had to "fire" my teacher I've been far from music for a while.
>If you're a man have a male therapist, that's the ideal stuff make sure you do that and don't think of therapy as something for degenerates only.
I had a female therapist. Never had a male therapist. I will try that in the future.
>Try to adopt an approach to life which goes like this (some self-help tier stuff might help - write this shit down and read it before going to sleep)
I think is weird, but I'll give it a try. There isn't anything to lose anyway.
>>712912623
Yea. Confusing sitution
Does your girl seem Shy or socially anxious?
I have lots of secrets mostly dirty and wrong. When I would stay the night at my friends house I would finger myself to her and I'm not even gay. Also, another time we would play truth or dare sometimes and end up kissing each other. Another one is that I would try to get my cousin to fuck and he would never do it, felt so wrong and now I'm so embarrassed
>>712905151
Yeah it's really not a big deal, if she actively wants to suck your dick chances are she still will when she sees your small dick.
Also, post pictures of girl you tiny dicked cuck faggot.
>>712912696
Yeah dude, stop fuckin' around with the girl at work, doesn't matter if you guys get along, it's jeopardizing a good-ass thing you got going. Also, how old are you?
>>712912806
How ugly are you?
>>712912835
I'm 29. Why do you ask?
>>712912806
Sounds hot.
>>712912731
>be 10 years old
>in love with girl
>move away
>Wait 8 years
>post on Chinese Cartoon forum for advice
Dude, as soon as you find another girl you'll forget about her, that's cynical, but it's the way the male brain works, stop looking at her facebook and meet somebody new.
>>712907561
Sucks man, but at this point you've done all you can. Let her know that you'll always be there for her and that she can talk to you if she wants to, and you kind of have to leave it at that.
You can't save her if she doesn't want to be saved, as much as you want to. You'll find someone else eventually anyways that will make you much happier.
>>712907250
thats hot... how did u find out? what did u do with them?
>>712912912
Just wondering if you were like 40 or more, it wouldn't change my answer much, just curious.
>>712905838
Are you a grill?
>>712909576
>3
There is a thing called toastmasters. Where you can practice pub speaking if you want.
>4
Love yourself before anyone else
>extra
Maybe talk to your parents about this 'leaching' not sure your exact situation, but they probably just want to help you.
>>712909712
m or f?
>>712913127
Nah I'm 29 my wife is 28. The woman at work is 34.
>>712912785
Yeah, me and some other guy are the only people she talks to, but obviously talks to me more due to talking before and after class and told me I'm easy to talk to and open up to, I try to help myself by saying that she must be really shy because there will be days where she'll say I'll text you later and never does and usually I'll always have to text first but sometimes we will go without texting each other for a while and recently its been a good while since we've talked to each other since I've texted her 2 times and she hasn't responded.
>>712911401
I love it when closets are friends with other slutty closets ;D
>>712912907
I've been single for the last 11 years. Most of the friends I went to hs with (graduated in '07) are married and have kids now.
>>712911056
Love needs effort, it doesn't come by itself. What you had was lust which died down as it always does.
>>712912623
That might just be the end of the honeymoon phase. I was in the same boat, even posted about it a few times, and today she initiated contact and things went back to the way they were before then. Even talked about what she was doing during the past few weeks when she was so off.
It's easy to get worked up about it, but just try and find something to keep yourself occupied while she's living her life...just because she's responding less doesn't mean she likes you any less, thankfully.
>>712913393
whore
you have a shitty camera
>>712905151
you got a girlfriend without her seeing your dick first? props my dude!
>>712913507
thank you
>>712913337
Ah.
As far as I can tell, my girl only speaks to me and a handful of others. (Mostly girls?)
But she won't ever start talking to me first in person even.
But she will always respond to me if I message her. Sometimes with a sizable delay. (Longest was a day) Usually no more than 15-20 minutes.
Sadly, its been a while since I last spoke to her. (Over a month.) Gonna message her tomorrow, to see if I can move this at all
>>712912525
That girl is just a dumb ho, not worth ruining your friendship. Tell your friend to grow some fucking balls, get rid of this dirtbag girlfriend, and you stay the fuck away from this slut.
Its good for your friend because then maybe he will learn to stop being a pathetic cuck bitch
Its good for you because you remain friends with your friend and you build some character/integrity.
Its good for that dumb slut because she will have to come face to face with reality when she realises what she lost, and hopefully devastate her enough for her to learn from her situation and grow as an individual
I fucked my cousin in July, just before she got married. I'm gonna see her this weekend and see if we can't find some time alone....
>>712913094
I didn't find out until a few weeks after were we met an actual couple who went through the same ordeal. They told us they had fallen for his trick as well and we were fairly certain it was the same guy. They found our because they saw her on the streets and when confronted she confessed. They made her do an STI test and luckly she had nothing serious.
Honestly I should have known better. There were some signs indicating something wasn't right but it was my first time and I wasn't aware that people would do that kind of stuff.
There wasn't anything I could do. I messaged him and tried calling him but he wouldn't answer.
>>712912806
Did you ever touch her? Weren't you nervous to cum in case she heard and woke up?
>>712913393
post tits, I need to maturbate, its 2:42 am here. I need to go to bed.
Also finger yourself on skype for me
I know how the Unites States Election was stolen.
SKYKING
SKYKING
SKYKING
SKYKING
IOTA LIMA
MIKE OSCAR
CHARLIE ALPHA
FOXTROT LIMA
TIME IS 20
PINEDEN OUT
>>712913658
you're very welcome
>>712913710
how about build up some integrity and moral values to go against what is clearly wrong. Quit being a pussy and show some character. dont give in to your pathetic incestual urges
>>712913778
I touched her when we would kiss and stuff but never when I would masturbate, and I wasn't worried she would wake up cause shes a heavy sleeper.
>>712901248
when i was 18 i hit my girlfriend when i was drunkd
I haven't been on a date or had a girlfriend since.
i turn 30 next month
>>712913899
How about you go fuck yourself
>>712913677
Yeah, sadly my last 2 texts I've sent have ended with no response but she still talks to me regularly in class and everything, I think I might just wait until this semester ends before trying to message her again, I guess then I'll be able to see if she's truly interested I guess.
>>712911056
I got married in 2012 and currently have a court date in January to get the divorce finalized.
I was stupid and married at 21. The divorce is easily the best decision I have made in the past five years. I just wasn't in love anymore and I was tired of having to be his mom instead of his wife.
People change and feelings change. If the relationship can't evolve and grow with the people, then it isn't going to work
>>712913393
could be a cute woman one day. but you have to do some self reflection and gather up some values and morals to put your life into perspective. If you have no moral barometer that helps drive your character, you will continually make mistakes and regrets that you cant get over. Move on from the past and work on willpower and conscious thinking.
>>712914236
I wont change lol, ive always been a fuck up
>>712901928
Dude you are way below her in status, she doesn't like you and will never want to be in a relationship with you. You are comic relief to her. I bet if you asked her on a date she would either ignore you or laugh in your face.
>>712913982
how about you go fuck your cousin you disgusting degenerative pig
>>712914395
....yeah. That's exactly the plan. That's a hell of a burn, bro.
>>712912292
>Good rule of thumb is, if you know you're in the right, fight like hell, if you think you might lose a fight/argument/roast battle, ignore or move on quickly.
Yeah, thanks for words. I'm pretty much on the same opinion. This helped me somewhat clear my mind. Thanks anon.
>>712914035
How long have you known her? And does she know that you are interested?
I've known mine since January, and started talking around April
And she most likely knows that I am into her
>>712914236
>>712914368
Don't listen to him, you're cute already. He's some sort of weird-ass fucking prude who wandered onto /b/ by accident.
>>712905151
Dick size does matter BUT girls generally don't give a fuck if they are really in to you or horny enough.
I have this friend who has an extra tiny dick and cums in two seconds but somehow he managed to get gf and he is also poor as fuck. They are still together after 5 years.
>>712912739
>>If you're a man have a male therapist, that's the ideal stuff make sure you do that and don't think of therapy as something for degenerates only.
>I had a female therapist. Never had a male therapist. I will try that in the future
That can be important. If you're a guy have guy therapist and vice versa. For a same sex therapist it will be much easier to understand your problems considering that he or she experienced growing up similar to you meanwhile for example a woman therapist for a man unless she is really good probably won't get a lot of stuff. She only read books about it.
Me and my girlfriend wrote a bunch of things we wanted to try during sex and put them in a jar. Every now and then we'll pull something out and do it. Last night she pulled out pegging...
>>712914552
thank you:)
>>712914802
Was that her suggestion, or yours? How'd it go?
>>712914368
see i can tell your coming from an immature teenage girl viewpoint. and this is completely fine. But as you grow older you realise you have no choice but to change and adapt to society, its a tough life, i know. But having the mindset of "oh i wont change, nothing matters because im going to fuck up anyway" is helping no one and is only limiting yourself to the potential you can unlock. Any individual can do or become anything they want, it takes willpower and conscious thinking. If you have a moral code and stick by it, you internally are proud of yourself whether you are conscious of it or not. Believe in yourself, look up some self help books and understand that you can accomplish anything you set your mind to. This mindset you have is the same as a fat person thinking "oh I can never get in shape, ive always just kept eating", but the fact is, they can easily get in shape if they put in the work and effort. We are all human and we all make mistakes, as long as you set some goals and you work on meeting them, you should be fine. You clearly have been through some troubles, and you need to self reflect and get to the core of your issues to understand them. and then look into the future and see where you want to be and go from there. This is all some random advice I can come up with, but its all true advice.
>tl;dr
We are all human, dont let your mind trick you into not achieving what you want
>>712914527
I've known her for about 4-5 months but didn't start talking to her till about 2-3 months ago, and I'm not sure I feel like she may, I've asked her if she wanted to get coffee together sometime and she seemed really interested but we've never made the effort to make the plans to do so.
>>712914384
Sure. What ever you say
>mainly sexually attracted to animals
>this is the only reason I became a vegetarian
>dropped acid a few times and thought I was a girl for a while
>only time I had sex was a fat chick fucking me with a strap-on
>brother recently came out as a transwoman and thinks I support him, but secretly I've been saying anti-trans things to my parents
>pattern of leading women on because I like feeling wanted
damn I should an hero
>>712914552
lol here comes the white knights, i never said she wasnt already cute you neckbeard. and I would rather be a "prude" if that means someone with actual integrity and values, then a degenerate loser who does whatever he wants then feels like shit after and doesnt know why
>>712901248
I killed a man.
With this thumb.
>>712915303
Sounds like you need to see a therapist, and potentially move cities to start anew
>>712906939
can i come chop your legs off?
>>712915457
Start by moving houses.
>>712914935
Hers obviously. She made me go to the sex shop with her to buy a strap on. The cashier gave me the weirdest look ever like she knew I was going to be in for a world of pain. She was right. Couldn't even get the whole thing inside me without screaming like a bitch. Now I know how girls feel when they do anal.
>>712915303
>>712915546
Jeremy Clarkson!
>>712913429
That's generally what happens after nearly a decade. Why've you been single that long?
For the last 4 months I've been finding dudes on CL who have male dogs. The plan is for me to get naked with the dog and they watch, but sometimes they touch and join in. Usually old nasty dudes too but if they want to suck on me while I suck on pooch it's ok. One guy has had me over 3 times now and he brings more friends each time. Last time there were 6 dudes and 3 dogs.
I can't stop but I feel like I'm going to get in trouble soon.
>>712915539
Narcissists: no sense of humor.
>>712915450
Story?
I am really hoping that turns out to be someone elses thumb
>>712915539
You didn't start out with something smaller?
>>712915690
That is definitely a bad idea. Are you actually fucking the dogs?
>>712915700
Me?
>>712915795
Nope. Probably should have though...
>>712915213
Damn. So similar to mine. We met up once on my suggestion but haven't since though she always seems interested when I bring it up. But we never arrange anything.
>>712915666
>Satan DEMANDS a response!
After high school, I didn't have it as easy as most people do; I wasn't able to go to college/Uni right after I finished, for example (was able to enroll when I was 21, and did so in a foreign country). I did a lot of moving around, working on and off, etc but nowhere I went, did any woman really approach me. Even when I worked in a warehouse, the women there were mostly a bit older and/or had kids/baggage. I washed out of the military twice, and am only now living in the same state I was when I was in high school...have been for the last 3 years, but my friends have generally abandoned me. Even the ones I made in college are starting to turn their backs on me, and my family doesn't even message/call me anymore.
When it boils down to it, I guess, women just don't want me.
>>712915539
You don't just jump in head first... you have to build up to it, and get used to the feeling of something being in your ass. You need to prepare over several weeks or it's not going to be pleasurable at all.
>>712915690
sounds like you have zero moral concept of anything. I feel bad for your disgusting existence and everyone of those poor innocent animals. stop being a degenerate you filth. I hope you either
>A.
realise how fucked up you are and seek a therapist and then eventually adapt to modern society as a regular individual.
>B.
You and everyone of those subhuman scumbags burn in hell fire for eternity
>>712901248
I am 30 years old and married to a 29 year old. We recently began discussing experimenting more sexually.
So far we have had let another couple watch us have sex and my wife gave a double blow job to myself and a friend of ours.
We would like to try some more but are being cautious and slow as to how we go about it.
She would like to try having sex with another woman. She has also hinted at watching another woman blow me.
Personally I'd like to DP her. Someone's cock in her mouth and mine in her cunt.
Anyone else swinging? How did you get into it?
>>712915816
Nope, doing just oral stuff, but sometimes they mount me but there hasn't been penetration. I've been tempted to let them find the hole but haven't let them yet. The owners always insist on the dog fucking me but that's not the deal.
>>712915956
That's a shame, ever want to try and get back into Uni and then get a better job?
>>712914785
>>712912739
When (if) you get a new therapist/doctor/whatever don't tell him at first your past diagnosis if you have any. Ask him to have a talk with you so you can make sure he is up for it. During the talk just try to have a casual talk and tell him some generic stuff.
If he almost instantly by looking at you gets close to your actual problems then he is probably your man.
If he starts talking in broad terms spamming bullshit or if he doesn't seem very confident and maybe rigorously trying to get your medical profile beforehand then it's usually a big no.
Professional around 50 are preferable due to experience. Don't let some new asshole treat you, they're usually shit.
Big plus on the guy for a guy stuff because you can discuss shit more easily with him especially about women, etc.
You might have more problems with telling a woman about your insecurities than a dude who can more easily act like a more experienced friend. However telling a 45 year old milf that you love milf porn is probably a bit cringe-worthy. Meanwhile a guy will easily bond with you by saying Yeah , I was into that too, etc. This is just an extreme example of course.
>>712916164
I'm 1 month away from graduation. I intend to leave the country permanently when I finish.
I've recently accepted the fact that I'm bi, but I don't have the nerve to actually hit on guys. My anxiety is fucking crippling enough with women, I can't fathom approaching a man for sex.
I think something that scares me most is going from playing with toys to giving that control to someone else. I don't know how if I'd freak out or if the adrenaline and satisfaction would override it. Plus my gag reflex is fucking pathetic.
Oh well. Guess I'll stick to women for the time being.
>>712916141
Why do you do it? Embarrassment? Actually interested in dogs?
Also, again, cops lurk on CL so it's an awful idea unless you're in one of the few states where it's not illegal.
>>712915717
I also robbed the second largest bank in france using only a ballpoint pen.
>>712915950
Yeah like when I first read yours, I couldn't help but think how damn similar the situations were, but anyway I kinda want to bring it up again but I don't want to feel like I'm pushing her too much into forcing her to going out so I feel like I'm cornered in that situation as well.
>>712916290
Awesome! Always good for a nice change. If you really want a woman that badly you can always travel to a country where if you're white and have money that's all they care about.
I secretly want to be the new Gengis Khan
>>712916489
>be me
>be not white
>>712916444
Yea. I last brought it up with my girl last month, and basically ended with us agreeing to do something, but never arranged anything.
For now I think it would be best to work on breaking down her wall to get her more comfortable with me. Then maybe from there we could do stuff
Probably the same could be said about your girl?
>>712916392
Since puberty I've always been attracted to dogs. Dunno why, I usually find their dicks and balls more arousing than men. And you can go out to the park and just watch them flopping around in public all afternoon if you want
>>712915968
It's a little too late for that now but I'll keep that in mind for next time when she pulls it out of the jar again.
>>712916758
Be essentially any race that isn't native to that land?
Which race are you out of curiosity?
>>712916810
Yeah, I just wish I could figure out how to do so.
>>712916879
black
>>712917138
Hm just don't go to Japan. Any other place should be ok but yeah Japs hate most other races let alone blacks.
>>712917081
One girl I know suggested to say something like this to her.
"I've noticed that you never seem to text first. Is there any reason why?"
Maybe it can help? Probably won't backfire atleast
>>712901928
Tell her you like her and ask her on a date.
Done
>>712917263
I have plenty of Japanese friends (they actually outnumber my American friends at the moment) who keep in regular contact with me (better than my own family). I know it will be rough, but if I can survive the xenophobia of Korea for years, I can survive Japan.
Open to other places as well though. Non-Western preferably.
>>712901248
I want to fuck so bad my spanish teacher
>>712917308
absolutely do not text this, holy shit.
And don't listen to other girls advice regarding it. Seriously.
>>712917472
True. Just figured it was worth a mention. I guess I could mention something about how we should talk more often next time we talk
>>712905838
Yea
>>712917308
Yeah, kinda feeling a little iffy on that because I don't want it to seem like I'm needy and basically force her to text me but at the same time I do want to try to break some barriers so I'm not sure.
>>712901248
I hacked Russell's IP cam.
>>712914826
yeh. agreed with that anon. i'd fuck you.
>>712917730
Yea. My concerns basically.
It might seems a bit too pushy, but on the other hand, it might help break some barriers.
Could try more of something mentioning how we should talk more often, next time you speak to her
My horrible secret...
>>712917935
Yeah I feel like that one would be a bit more on the safer side which I might try next time I talk to her, hopefully everything will go well.
>>712917817
Who?
>>712917939
I like it anon ;)
>>712918098
Yea. I think that's what I'll do as well. Gonna try tomorrow with her. I'll be out most of the day, which should keep my mind of her a bit, so I'm not watching my phone like crazy.
I think Final Fantasy is overhyped.
>>712901248
Bad acid trip today. I'm not ok. Don't give a fuck about attention. Simply want a positive sign. What's the word /b/? Is this shit fucked or not? What the actual fuck is happening
Im a 20 year old virgin and Im afraid of having sex, not entirely sure what to do with my sex life even though i habe an above average peniz size
>>712918269
Good luck bro, I'll be wishing for the best for you, and yeah I feel ya on that last part.
>>712918501
Everything is gonna be fine lad. The world seems scary right now but it's moving in the right direction.
>>712918566
Same to you, when ever you decide to try.
Maybe I'll update if we got another thread like this tomorrow night
I used to jerk off in my sister's panties but I stopped after she got pregnant. I know I didn't get her pregnant with that but I just got too nervous.
>>712901248
I got my gf into bestiality, and now into incest. She has a teenage daughter, we talk about what we'd do to/with her if she was to join us in bed. We'd fantasize about teaching her how to suck cock and being a proper fuck toy. It was all fun and games until she brought up drugging her with benzoes, with a dead serious look on her face.
A small part of me says fuck yeah, but for the most part I'm fucking scared.
>>712918501
It fades, you'll be fine. I can't even remember what I was freaking out about anymore because I stopped caring about it.
Get off on thinking of my gf doing glory hole swallow
>>712919007
Mother of the year!
>>712919007
the girl of my dreams
>>712918691
Cheers, thanks
moms friend tried to fonger me in the back of my moms car
>>712919007
Lean into it, buddy
>>712919121
I've absolutely done the same
>>712918929
Yeah, I won't be able to see her again till Tuesday but I definitely will try then, and I'll make sure to keep a look out for you if so.
Justin Trudeau has a secret
My lesbian boss has a crush on me...and she's hot...
>>712919030
Yeah true say. Some things stay with u tho. It got weird
>>712919443
I don't see mine in person much beyond just in passing, so I am stuck with it being via text.
Also, how old are both of you? >>712919443
>>712906957
damn got me
>>712919030
Nahhh nvm my bad not listening. It'll fade
>>712919470
Are you m or f? Either way go for it.
>>712919470
You should hit that G
>>712902152
>Never seen one of these at this time, so whatever.
>> Have 100GB Truecrypt container with very questionable porn
>> including multiple videos of myself masturbating with things in my ass over the last 6 years or smth, also nudez of exes etc.
>> fooled around with male friends at age of 10-12
Are you me?
>>712905838
I relate to that so hard. I love the thought of being THAT desired.
>>712919721
I have a class with her and also text, but I'm just relying on face to face until I feel like it's good to text again, and I'm 19 and I think she's 19 as well if not 18.
hey can i get some relationship advice
>>712919976
Ah, we're both 20, (with her being 21 next month)
I would do it in person if I had class with her this semester, but sadly I don't. So I'm stuck with only text.
>>712901928
She's a girl.
That's your answer. Guys give girls way more attention than girls give guys. Girls don't need to text first. If you don't text her another guy will. She's not hurting for a texting buddy. She will see any guy who whines about not being texted first as just that... a whiner.
The fact she responds at all means she could be interested, but it could also mean she just wants a friend. Keep in mind most guys always want to get beyond friendship and she knows that. She will see you coming a mile away so be yourself and be honest and don't be a fucking try-hard.
Good luck anon.
>>712920143
We'll do our best, anon.
>>712904895
>>712920215
Yeah at least your still in contact with her for the most part so that's something good to look at.
>>712919187
>Mother of the year!
And it's my fault, I didn't know her father abused her for years. My prodding and pushing her into that direction brought something up in her, and now I feel like shit.
>>712919326
>the girl of my dreams
I thought so too, but the look on her face when she suggested that scared me to hell and back. She was dead serious.
>>712919391
>Lean into it, buddy
Just try to picture the morning after, the awkwardness, the silence, the looks of disgust on their faces.
>>712920609
Well I guess. Hopefully it works out decently tomorrow for me.
>>712901248
I'm addicted to MDMA.
No fucks yet though because it hasn't really affected my life in a bad way.
In fact, it caused me to shed a lot of anxiety and become more open-minded. I basically demanded a raise at work and got it, I also convinced my gf to have a threesome with her hot friend and started taking action to correct a lot of fucked up shit in my life.
Thanks MDMA.
I got into hypnosis and started hypnotizing people for practice, one of them being my cousin. Anyway for most of the sessions, I silently jerked off in front of them during it without anyone noticing
Just got out of the military last week, the day after i got out i moved back home (where my wife had been getting everything ready for the past month) to find out my wife had been cheating on me and now the guy practically lives the places we were supposed to live oh he is also a felon on probation...I also have a 4 year old daughter. Life is shit.
Gore threads are a destresser for me.
>>712920232
The girl in my case called suspects or knows I am into her, and never tried to put me as just a friend.
Also, she seems to be the typical socially anxious or shy girl with only two friends. So yea
>>712901248
Kinda bummed that Human beings will probably never leave the solar system.
>>712920961
probably all thought, "Oh god, he's jerking off in front of us again. Pretend he isn't doing it, it will be too awkward to say anything."
>>712901248
I wish Bernie would have won.
>>712921126
lol wouldn't doubt it, but if they're coming back it must not be too hard on them.
>>712919007
fake ass shit
I piss into bird baths as often as I can.
Sick of those fuckers shitting on my vehicles.
>>712920726
Wishing you the best of luck again for tomorrow bro
>>712919456
I voted for him and probably will again.
How does that make you feel anon?
Are
you
mad
?
Aaaahhh it's back tonight I hear the fucking low volume of giggling. I hate these nights! I wish I had a fucking tv to drown it all out with video games. Fuck. There goes my rest for tonight so I'm here to vent!!!
I often roll repeating digits without trying and when i try i never get them. pic related
I sell nudes for a living even tho i have a boyfriend and he dosent know ._.
(my kik is cruxiie)
>>712921617
fucking whore
doing the lords work.
>>712921498
fuck are you talking about
I love the smell of my earwax.
>>712921897
> me: 31
> wife: 29
> married for 5 years
> for the past 7, I've been having an affair with her younger sister
> sister in law: 24
Not really my secret necessarily, or at least the secret is just that I know.
But I have a buddy that confided to me while we were very very drunk that his mom gives him head once in awhile. I see the both of them often (they don't live together but she always visits his place, she's really nice, kind of hippy'ish and into silly new-age stuff) and after he told me it made a lot of sense in hindsight.
Still can't stop thinking about it, and this was a few months ago now. We've only talked about it briefly since then, he's open about it but I didn't want to make it super weird by acting like I'm asking questions in order to jack off about it later.
According to him they've been doing it off and on for years, she's just very open and enjoys it.
No pics or anything, and you guys wouldn't care anyhow since she isn't hot. He's in his late 20s as far as that matters.
The end. Sorry for the boring secret.
Alright so i have this thing for a bisexual girl who's also dating a girl who's been one of my best friends since kindergarten. I see them both all the time but the one i have a thing for more. Also her girlfriend is my other friends ex so there's that
Anyway it kills me everytime i see her and i can't act normal help
I think i got my daughter pregnant
