ITT We discuss the stupidest shit about our jobs
>Be me
>cook at bowling alley local chain
>nigger brings his own drink in
>"Sir, we know you brought that in so we can't refill it just in case you ask"
>niggers come
>walks up to us
>"ca' aye 'ave a 'kp"
>"sure"
>Give him a Styrofoam
>nigger and his hoe are at a lane
>she has green hair like harley quinn
>an hour later
>nigger nigs
>"yo mang cn aye git a refill?"
>"No. Like we told you, we know you didn't buy a drink"
>"It's because I'm black isn't it?"
>"No it's cause you'd be stealing and it's wrong. Buy a drink and we will give you a refill"
>Don't blame the nigger, mostly cause it's 3.18 for a drink... a normal Styrofoam cup
>Nigger gets mad
>Nigger talks to my manager
>Nigger is told the exact same thing
This was months before I worked there
>We have an arcade
>it's alright for children
>Nothing amazing
>Child gets tickets
>whats something from behind the counter
>doesn't have enough tickets
>child cries
>one of our employees offers him candy
>dad finds out about this
>dad flips his gourd saying that someone there wants to molest his child
>explain to the dumbass it was just to help him stop being upset
>dad doesn't listen
>dad gets physical with the manager
>someone calls the police
>this is not the first time this has happened
>we have dumbass customers
>kids are also pretty fucking tard
This also explains why we don't get good games in the arcade... Fuck get us Street fighter or Pokken or Tekken or Mario Kart FFS
selfish bump
1 more selfish bump then i give up
>be me, yesterday
>be stockboy at a grocery store chain
>run promotion on a particular sort of cherry tomatoes (0,5 kg in 1 package)
>there is a 1,79 € pricetag
>there's a sticker informing about 50% discount too
>old lady comes
>"how much do these 1,79 € tomatoes cost after the discount
>tell her it's 0,90 €
>"are you sure?"
>yes mam
>"are you sure?"
>YES
stupid cunt people piss me off
>work at a food plant
>place is cut into different departments
>management decides to move around the senior managers of each department
>my area gets the most hated moron that caused people to quit enmasse
>he come sover bringing his dumbshit ideas that caused people problems
>starts dictating shit left and right
>doesnt know the systems, but oh lordy did the Faggot read the SOPs
>he expert now
>tells everyone how wrong they are and how nothing is done right
>takes daily walks to find "problems" only to make our lives as hard as possible
>fucker shits on every single system cause he thinks he knows what hes doing
>every day i contemplate slashing his tires
>Writes everyone up for the most dumbass shit
>HR has had enough of his shit and has told him to stop
>he now tries to be incognito about his crap
I hope karma reams his ass one day
>Be me
>Mandatory one-week work somewhere
>Dumbass me went to a supermarket
>On the 5th day a black woman walks in with her two bitchass daughters.
>The niggers ass was almost wider than the isles
>Nigger talks into phone while the kiddos start opening candy packages
>Run over and politely tell the children to buy them or stop
>NIGGERTRIGGER.exe
>Gets insulted and called a racist
>Keepcalm.png
>The oldest daughter jumps me from behind
>Nigger goes apeshit and tries to kill me
>Guards break up the fight
>She leaves with her kids
>Finds iPhone on floor
>No password
>Gets fired and goes home with a blue eye
>Opened the niggers social media and uploaded porn
>Wiped the phone and started using it.
>>712737835
Slash his tires you faggot. No one would blame you, and you'd be a hero
>work at wallyworld electronics area
>have a useless dep manager
>she does nothing all day
>friends with all the higher ups tho
>sometimes she leaves early because she can
>swamps us with work while shes out back doing god knows what
>super bitch to me in particular because i told her off at one point
>cant stand it anymore and leave to another area
>find out years later that she got demoted to a people greeter like status until she quit
fun shit
>>712738354
that sounds fun as hell to watch
>come into work seeing district manager there
>managers all looking worried
>district manager obviously not pleased, being stern with the managers
>the district manager leaves
>one manager comes up to me, "hey anon, I know this is a lot to ask but could you clean out from behind the server's side station"
>look behind the side station, Jesus Christ this place looks like it's never been cleaned in the 15 years this restauarant has been here
>manager tries to coax me "we'll buy you free dinner"
>realize the restaurant was probably going to be inspected tomorrow and I don't want the place to go under
>begrudgingly accept, spend 2 hours scrubbing and cleaning
>manager comes up to me after I finish
>"heyyyy, can you do the other one too? We'll give you a $25 gift card"
>look at that side station
>Lord have mercy
>I thought the other one was bad
>it looks literally hazardous, like designated shitting street toxic
>REALLY don't want to do it
>manager begs, I sigh and do it
>3 hours for this one, now covered in filth and I don't even know what
>finish it, sure enough inspector comes next day
>restaurant passes, managers thank me a lot
may have sucked doing it but feels good I helped people out who really needed it
>>712736751
>work on construction sites across America as explosives engineer and wrecking-ball operator
>demolition work pays very well, requires advanced degree and extensive training
>always stuck working with what I call "navy blue collar" types, no real talent or skills
>conversations always revolve around sports or "muh Chevy" truck babbling
>nearly everyone knows 100% stats for athletes and scores for games, common knowledge out the window, no academia at all
>faux-racists on every site, complain about niggers and spics taking jobs blab blah blah
>ask them all why they worship sport niggers but demonize others, a nigger is a nigger
>they all rage and screech in autistic tones/volumes afterwards until the project ends
>be me
>be working at plastic molding factory
>not hard, take plastic shit, check it for defects, remove any excess material and package it
>everybody pulls their weight and does their shit
>except the fucking technicians
>they take naps on the conveyor belts
>they refuse to come fix the presses when they're supposed to
>shrinkwrap machine is too hot, burning holes in the shrinkwrap? lemme turn the heat up for ya bruh
>they also like to come tell me how I'm doing my job wrong and how to do it right
>frequently inform them they aren't my supervisor and they can fuck off
>steal their magnets when they aren't paying attention
still better than fast food, I'll say that.
>>712738734
I'veseen this too, working in carpentry you get a lot of the same general people you're talking about. I just don't get it.
>>712736751
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oKpfjVkmGvA&
>>712738938
those morals tho
i like my job. can't think of anything stupid about it
My boss!
>work in wastewater treatment plant
>at the time was working at the front of the plant
>all water is screened coming into plant
>catches rags and trash that people flush
>plus other things
>one night found $20
>wrapped $20 in paper towel
>take it to 7-11
>give it to Hakim behind the counter in exchange for 12 cups of coffee for my crew
>cringe when he touches bill with his hand
>have found other things too
>rings
>packages of drugs
>credit cards
>most disturbing was a fetus.
>>712738734
Similar story
>work in construction in UK
>on site in Glasgow
>having lunch in canteen
>some half-nigger asks canteen lady for punani instead of panini
>whole canteen erupts in laughter
>people clapping and whooping
>punani becomes word of the month
>everyone repeating it, whole conversations revolve around it
>work has to stop because all anyone can think about is punani
>facepalm.jpg
>this is the kind of shit that happened in school, and these morons still find it funny
>>712739898
>packages of drugs
Reminds me of when I had to flush a bunch of pills. Shit hurt :/
>>712740305
people like that don't grow the fuck up till they have kids or their life is about to end up in a studio apartment with their dog Doug... These are the people all you want to do is tell them to fuck off cause they think cause they got laid at their Highschool prom, they are the shit
>>712737734
It's 0.895 tho
>>712740305
That stopped for me when I was 10.
>be me when i used to work for shitty airline
>cuck customer comes in wanting to check in bag
>tells me he has flight for boston which has left/ended for the day
>"oh sir ur flight left"
>cuck customer "no it's for tomorrows flight"
>mfw al queda hijinks
>advise him that no we cannot hold onto his bag for a flight for tomorrow
>starts yelling he'll never fly with our airline again
i have more stupid/crazy airport stories if anyone wants them from when i used to work here
>>712740819
do eet
>>712736751
redneck
>Be me, manager in retail outlet
>Customer asks to buy product
>Tell him we currently have no stock of requested line
>"Show me"
>Takes customer to empty shelf
>"you no have?"
>Walk away in disbelief
The customer is never right.
>wait tables at a casino restaurant
>group of 6 chinese guys comes in
>it's a complimentary dining area for patrons of a certain level
>only one of them fits the criteria, and they can only bring one guest
>supervisor says he's a high roller and to let it slide
>they spend hours and hours there, when partons are expected to leave after half an hour so others can eat too
>the entire time they do nothing but order drinks and yell for service
>they finally leave
>3 dollar tip
Hope they choke on smog.
>>712736751
>be me
>dont have job
>>712740867
>be me working $9 an hour for shitty airline
>horribly understaffed and filled with incompetent workers
>gets stuck doing baggage claims aside from ticket counter
>anyways cx frequently forget their checked in shit at the gate
>first day at the job and drunk fat ass and his equally fat ass wife mad bc their baby carriage didn't show up at the conveyor belt
>white nigga starts yelling and throwing shit
>tell him to go upstairs to the counter and i'll get it for him
>badge doesn't work so i go upstairs too to walkie-talkie coworker to bring it
>they take their time bc they have to fill out forms after flight
>white monkey starts screaming at everyone including me at the counter demanding our badges and last names
>begins tearing apart the line and screaming "I WANT MY BABY STROLLER GIVE ME MY FUCKING BABY STROLLER"
>everyone at counter just looking at him
>eventually someone from JetBlue calls security
>mfw the cops show up and he goes from 100mph-0mph
>>712738514
Good on you anon
>be me
>french as fuck
>work in a restaurant
>bitch customer comes in
>she only speaks italian
>no french
>no english
>bitch spends the whole time speaking to me, asking me shit and whatsnot
>in italian
>inb4 i fuckin hate italians
>i try to communicate
>but bitch still stands looking me in the eyes, talking to me in italian like if i was supposed to speak fucking italian
>at some point i get tired of this shit
>tell her i'm fucking tired of this shit
>bitch suddenly speaks perfect french
>to my manager
>bitch got me good there
>well done bitch
>i ever find you, you get the knife
>bitch
>>712741357
cont'
>be working at the counter after finally losing my v-card
>decide to wear red lipstick bc what the hell
>dark af nigger comes up and asks about southwestern airlines
>sign above clearly mentions airline name
>airline name is not southwestern
>advise him and he starts hitting on me after
>mfw he's holding up the line
>>712741140
me or the retards?
Granted, I live in GA but I dont consider myself a redneck. I consider myself a bit higher cause I don't sound southern
>>712741528
im still learning French
>>712741543
tits or gtfo
>>712741543
>recap: be working for shitty airline
>it's a shitty month bc delayed flights, cancelled flights, birdstrikes, etc.
>basically u see the worst in people at the airport
>been working a lot bc gotta move people to the next available flight and/or refund them
>anyways worst flight cancellation ever that day
>white bitch complains and complains and doesn't understand we can't do anything for her
>starts making up shit claiming supervisor promised her a free ticket, free food, etc.
>no way in hell would this ever happen
>after an hour of dealing with this bitch finally insinuate she's a liar and all hell breaks loose
>bitch demands a gate pass to tell supervisor i called her a liar
>demands video copies of the cameras above
>i clearly stopped giving a fuck the moment i gave her her damn gate pass
>be me
>Lawyer at my own firm
>I'm my own boss
>Don't have to deal with the shit you all do
>Try getting an education, you Trump-supporting cucks
>>712737835
>I hope karma reams his ass one day
No anon, you need to be the karma. May your actions be just and swift. Rise to become alpha.
>start a confrontation with him among your coworkers
>work him up enough to take a swing at you
>let him miss
>fuck his shit up
>>712737922
Missed opportunity to use pic related
>>712741986
final:
>worst was when i needed the money and worked overtime doing the priority line from 8pm-12pm for delta airlines
>fuckers argued about a stupid fucking line
>mfw most airports don't even offer this at their tsa lines
>worst was when fucktards brought water that was open and gave it to me to drink
>worst was when fucking people thought i knew about their fucking flights when clearly i worked for a different airline
>even best: when people fucking sat on my seat while I was checking people's tickets
i fucking hated working at the airport i don't recommend it people are stupid as fuck and it is grossly underpaid and overrated
>>712741297
You deserve this for working in a casino.
That's exactly what you signed up for.
>>712741528
Italians are subhuman.
>Be tire installer
>big ass ex football looking type middle age double comes in with his 92 Mustang with tires and rims he bought else where
>starts off my telling our service advisors on the front yard counter how it's mint amd not to scratch it etc with a colourful vocabulary
>other guy gets and the customer decides to ignore the signs walk in the shop amd hover over the other tire guy
>politely inform him due to insurance reasons we can't have customers on the shop while work is being done
"FINE JUST TAKE CARE OF MY FUCKING CAR"
>I brush it off and other guy keeps working
>other guy calls me over and says the tires and rims the guy bought don't fit on the rear axle because they're too wide and are hitting a shock absorber that's part of the suspension and attaches the axle to the body
"Sorry sir we can't fit the tires they're too wide."
>His response
"Bullshit I know they fit I had them on last year. You just have to take the bolts out on the thingy and flip it."
"Okay sir but that is additional work not part of the tire installation and I'll have to talk to my mechanics for an estimate."
"Bullshit it's just two bolts just take care of my fucking car."
>me and mechanic look over the problem and the tire is hitting a shock absorber meant to prevent axle hop which is caused when a you stomp on the pedal and whole rear axle will rotate, causing the driveshaft to lock up and destroy a bunch of shit
>mechanic says it's part of the factory suspension so we won't alter the vehicle
>politely inform customer we can't do it our mechanics won't risk it
>demands to see manager then spends 15 mins yelling at him to order the mechanic to flip the shock for free
>manager steps up to the plate and still poltiletly tells him he can't do that since it's their license on the line
>manager is a mechanic as well and finally tells the guy off that we won't put big slicks on his shit box and to go somewhere else.
>be 18
>work at a Gas Station
>frequently asked what are the tricks to winning the lottery (don't play)
>customers always complain about the harm cigarettes do and the price
>customers always make a drink and leave it or even spill it on purpose
>once some middle school kids bought some condoms and recorded it
ITT same thing as high school everyone is fucking retarded
>be me
>who else?
>waiter at moderately upscale steakhouse
>it's 18:30
>4 top comes in
>nobigdeal.png
>looks like a dude, his wife, and their 2 kids
>hostess seats them
>take their order
>still nothing of consequence
>their food comes out
>cool
>19:30 rolls around
>suddenly fucking swamped
>dumbass manager accepted a dickload of walk-ins
>even though we were booked solid from 19:00 onwards
>whatever, just run my ass off
>notice something
>the 4 top from earlier is still there
>busser already cleared their dishes
>maybe they want dessert
>go over and ask
Nah we're fine
>Uh, okay
>flash forward to 21:00
>still a ton of people waiting
>why do all of you want to eat here???
>we're doing our best to flip tables as fast as possible
>manager yelling in the back
>cook having a nervous breakdown
>4 top still there
>just chatting
>15 feet from the line of people waiting to be seated
>why.tiff
>people waiting getting mad
>glaring at 4 top
>flash forward again
>23:00
>quitting time
>rush is over
>everyone's gone
>about to start my side work
>coming out of the back
>4 top is still there
>have to tell them we're closing
>u gotta go
>they make a big fuss of leaving
>kids are almost asleep
WHY DO PEOPLE DO THIS
>>712742072
if someone did that to me i would start jacking off infron of them to show im the real alpha
>>712742048
>Be you
>Be douche since grade school
>alienate everyone around me and argue with everyone
>become lawyer because I want to victimize those who don't like the asshole I am
>get dad to pay my way through school and find a low level associate job at some 3rd tier city
>don't get any clients, no coworkers want to talk to me during the day
>shitpost on 4chan and attempt to alienate more people I've never met
>>712736751
> do tech support for shit tier monitors
> been at it longer than the rest of the high turnover retards and don't make shit up like my obese boss
> not allowed to tell people the truth most of the time
> they really don't give a shit about manufacturing tolerances or QC so you can get 2 out of the box that are different hues/brightnesses
> coating can yellow over time
> have to go through all the troubleshooting even when I know it's not gonna work and then forward it up for review when I know the answer is gonna be "just change the picture settings" and I can't tell them to take it back
It's a colossal waste of everyone's time but if the customer is being a dick I enjoy making them waste time
Also fucking dealers are retarded
> 1 out of every 666 or so actually has the purchase date
> they believe their word is law so they refuse to troubleshoot and I happily shut them down
> they have some of the dumbest motherfuckers as techs who can't tell the difference between HDMI and usb or need their hand held through every goddamn thing on a computer
>computer shop stories
>now press enter
>"where?"
>on your keyboard?
>"I HAVE NO KEYBOARD"
>...
>"Oh wait, right"
>"yes, hello, I'm looking to buy some powerline adapters"
>we have x, y and z
>"how many millibits are those?"
>"I installed this microsoft scanner and it says my computer is broken!"
>try explaining for 10 minutes it's a junk program that's trying to get em to buy their 'fix'
>"BUT YOU SOLD ME THIS <GENERIC AV> I THOUGHT I WAS PROTECTED AGAINST SHIT LIKE THAT
I came up with a good analogy to explain how an antivirus protects your computer, I'm sure more of you come across people like this:
>computer = house
>antivirus = alarm
>it will keep most thieves away
>but if you leave the door unlocked (= click accept on everything) they can still get in
>day old pc
>infected through every orifice
>"YOUR GUY THAT DELIVERED AND CONNECTED IT MUST HAVE DONE THAT"
>new ipad/S4/whatever shiny status symbol
>i dropped it/drove over it/dunked it in my salsa
>"what do you mean no warranty?!??"
>computer within warranty
>get bitched at because I won't fix the bloat and virii they installed themselves for free because muh warranty
>>712741543
>be working at the counter after finally losing my v-card
>decide to wear red lipstick bc what the hell
what does that have to do with the rest of your story??
>>712742927
>"my external hard drive crashed, can you please fix it"
>diagnose, it's fubar
>"BUT ALL MY PRECIOUS DATA DAT WAS MY BACKUP DISK"
>if it's a backup, you must have the originals on your computer, no?
>"NO I JUST TOLD YOU THAT WAS MY BACKUP"
>Well, if your data is so important, we can send it to a lab for recovery
>"YES"
>prices start at $1000 not including taxes
>"...nevermind, it's not -that- important"
>"my laptops' keyboard isn't working anymore"
>did you spill anything on it?
>"Nope"
>open it up
>sticky as fuck, brown goo, smells of coffee
>call em up
>someone spilled coffee over it, that'll be €80~150 (depends on brand) to fix
>"ermahgerd"
>"I tried plugging in my usb drive and my computer won't boot anymore"
>check the port
>plastic tab broken off
>all metal legs mangled together and mashed down
>show this to customer
>dat shame
>"my phone won't work anymore"
>did anything happen to it?
>"nope i take good care of it"
>take a closer look
>every corner has some dents
>even the fucking battery looks scratched
>explain this won't be covered by warranty because of user damage
>"omg that happened months ago and is totally not related"
>>712742954
>"my harddisk stopped working"
>"so I opened it up and took a look at it, that arm is just jumping up and down"
>"I checked online and they say you can replace this"
>explain how him opening it up already fucked it beyond repair, and that the people that can fix something like that do so in a controlled environment in a lab wearing special clothing and everything
>tfw that glimmer of hope dies
>customer brings in old pc for repairs
>turns out it can't be repaired
>he returns and rants for 15 fucking minutes about how horrible the service is
>we sold him crap, it is UNHEARD of that a computer dies after a mere 8 years of service etc etc
>customer buys new tablet
>returns the next day, claims it has problems booting
>colleague turns it on, "now what was the problem exactly?"
>"no no no you're doing it all wrong"
>colleague turns it off again and hands it back "please show me the problem"
>customer holds down the power button until the screen comes on
>keeps holding it
>which, of course, causes the thing to turn off mid-boot
>"See! That's not supposed to happen!"
>Sir, you don't need to hold the power button for so long
>"Don't tell me what to do! I know my stuff!"
>other colleague that hasn't heard what happened butts in
>tells the customer the same thing
>"I AM RIGHT AND YOU ARE WRONG" etc
>he gets another tablet (against policy, but we're just trying to get him out of the store by now)
>returns later that day
>"THIS ONE HAS THE SAME PROBLEM"
>Boss flatout tells him he is the problem, and that he can have his money back if he promises to never set a foot in our store again
>customer calls us later that week
>he got a brandless tablet from a supermarket
>lo and behold, same problem
>still thinks he is doing it right and the technology is the problem
>What Windows are you using?
>"Windows 4?"
>"Wut?"
>"internet exploder 12"
>"Windows Vista 2010"
>"Word"
People still say "internet exploder" too.
>>712743022
>colleague gets a call
>customer has trouble with Java update
>somewhere in the process she gets a little window with the buttons "Ok" and "More information"
>colleague spend the next fifteen fucking minutes trying to explain that the OK was to continue
>and not an "OK, I want More information"
>in 4 years I've rarely seen that man upset, but in the end he was yelling
>spyware infected computer
>those typical "ZOMG UR INFECTED BUY THIS TO FIX" programs
>fix it, he picks it up
>calls us 2 hours later, his internet won't work, and that's our fault
>he reinstalled 3 of those progs
>he paid for em
>"I just bought this printer and it won't work"
>take a quick look, doesn't work indeed
>give customer a new one
>she's back within 15 minutes "I can't get the plastic protection out"
>suspiciousasfuck.apk
>take it out of the box
>the flatcable running to the printhead is dangling out the front
>"the manual said to take out all that plastic stuff"
>closely check the first printer
>she managed to yank out the flatcable completely
>and insisted she wasn't at fault, the manual was unclear
>our external drive stopped working
>my brother is good with this stuff, he took a look at it but can't fix it either
>could you try to recover my photos?
>"Sure thing"
>as I pick up the disk I notice the top sticker is loose
>... did your brother open this (the actual disk) as well?
>"Yes?"
>politely explain how it's most likely FUBAR now
>Her smile and optimism: Gone
>customer addicted to some browser game
>plays on laptop with broken fan
>has to -run- to freezer every hour to switch out the cold packs its resting on
>I just lost everything on my phone!
>swipe to next homescreen
>"oh"
>>712742938
I just found it interesting to add is all jesus christ
>>712736751
> Be Me
> Living off Disability
> Get a thousand a month
> Enjoying life without a job or responsibilities
> Time spent eating pizza and sushi, playing video games and browsing /b/
>>712738514
You should have said "fuck the dinner and gift card, now about my raise..."
>>712740718
Stockboy job meaning his education level is shit don't expect math out of him
>>712743071
>old lady calls us about a problem with her phone
>start explaining something
>she stops me because she can't find her phone
>5 minutes later she realizes it's the one she's calling with
>laptop won't boot
>Have you tried to remove the battery?
>"When I push button a slide comes out is that battery?"
>repair a PC
>customer does system restore immediately after pickup, back to the point when it was fucked
>because his printer didn't work anymore
>of course it's our fault it's fucked again
>i wake up
>i don't know who is in my apartment
>i don't know who was there
>my stuff doesn't usually get touched / moved
>I shower
>I get dressed and eat my breakfast
>don't think
>I don't think of it
>I get to work
>I talk to my coworkers
>I forget crimes
>I don't forgive myself
>I inject marijuana
>I inject marijuana with my coworkers
>don't think lasts a while
>it's too empty for me inside
>I don't smile anymore
>I go home andsleep
>i wake up when i sleep the first time
>>712743072
did you get to hang out in the airline lounges at least at get free food?
>>712740718
>40718
>>be me, yesterday
>>be stockboy at a grocery store chain
>>run promotion on a particular sort of cherry tomatoes (0,5 kg in 1 package)
>>there is a 1,79 € pricetag
no its not because you round up, do you even math?
>>712742792
Nope more like
>Be me
>Have tons of clients
>Work at my own firm
>Have tons of friends
>Have more money than I know what to do with
>Shitpost on 4chan so you can all feel shitty about yourselves
>>712742594
Similar story
>worked at Italian restaurant while in highschool, as a dishwasher
>bar closed at 11 and stayed open until people left, so hopefully 11 30 or so
>one night it was 11 and 3 people came in
>stayed for a while weren't sure if they planed to leave
>all but me, manager, 1 waitress and the bartender had to stay until they were done.... at 1am
>I had to clean 4 plates and 5 glasses...
>>712742927
>>712742954
>>712743022
>>712743071
>>712743144
these are gold keep em coming
>>712743303
that's really cool anon !
>>712743223
hahaha fuck no I worked for a small airport with it's only direct international flight being canada. the only thing i did was get free flights and i would give myself the front seat and free bags bc why not
shitty airline didn't offer food or in flight service so i only flew with them when it was a short domestic flight
>Be day trader
>Wake up
>Grab coffee
>Lose $150,000 by the time I get to my computer
Feels bad.
>a
>short
>domestic
>>712743393
what do you do now?
>be me
>work in sawmill
>fucking hate it but $23 an hour is nice
>drive a forklift
>literally 3 hours of work in a day
>day is 8 hours long
>get yelled at for 5 hours every day because I have no work to do
>$23 an hour to sit around for an 5 hours on 4chan and listen to music
>coworkers hate me because easy job
>mfw
Not my fault I do my work 5 hours faster than the last fucker
>>712743095
max benefit for disability runs from 743-860 depending on state.
>>712743503
>autism for 23 hrs/ dollar
>>712738734
What is it with dumb people and sports? Every dumb person I have known was waaay too into sports. They knew fucking everything about certain soccer players but fuck all about anything else.
>Be me.
>Trained and graduated marine engineer with a no-limits electrical degree, plenty of experience from sailing with the worlds leading container-shipping line.
>I tire from sailing and decide on a carrer change - find a job in greenland, being Junior Technical Manager of Shrimp Factory. Doing seven week tours, with my travel-expenses paid, after which I will have seven weeks off with full wage.
The job pays 5000+ Dollars plus, which is an increase of about 1000 Dollars from my time as a seaman.
>Meet the technical manager of the plant; the guys is a truck-mechanic.
>My job at the plant is ordering, project management, staff management, on-call technical assistance for the technical staff (most of the are welders and the sort, so they have no grounds for understanding machinery control, steam-production or cooling) and maitenance-supervision and general documentation.
>Spent six weeks at the plant, and the technical manager is relieved by his back-to-back, who is an electrician.
>Niether of the two has any qualifications for managing the technicians at the plant, nor for understanding half of the machinery or installation - some of the things they say make my head hurt.
>Go home for seven weeks and come back.
>I am told, I will no longer be doing documentation, ordering, project management or documentation because the electrician found it too hard to figure out, who has done what.
>I am now working a 5000 Dollar+ wage doing simple maitenance and day-to-day workshop management...
>unless mommy's with you so you're smart again
ueno-et
>>712743452
I work as a technician for an electrical company. pays well, has good benefits, company boss is super into family shit and likes throwing parties every holiday. the major upside is i don't have to work holidays, it's full time, get free vision and dental, and get 2 weeks paid vacay after 6 months
>>712743600
It's wonderful :^)
>be me
>Own a bakery
>Go on travel
>Get phone call
>One of the Bakers got pissed off at other Baker and left.
>Have to work his shift
> No new Baker found
>Get 5 thousand a month more but actually have to work
>>712743334
That's all I got for now, I don't always remember to write em down.
>>712743303
>still be you
>claim my father's clients are mine because my last name is on the door
>claim the people who hang around me ate friends when they just tolerate me because I'm so rich
>shitpost on 4chan to hide to the unfulfilled dreams of being a gay pole dancer
>>712743334
they aren't gold. his stories were the most boring here.
>>712743600
23 hrs/ dollar is not the same thing as 23$/hr. that's about 4¢/hr
I work at Dell. All of our product sucks, all of our process sucks, customer experience sucks, no one gets paid, workers look stupid but cannot navigate process until no one can help. Fuck this shit.
I got the most hated manager fired from one of my workplaces once.
> night shift
> working in industrial bakery
> shift foreman but still union
> notice some contamination
> wierd black shit in bread pans
> shut line down, call manager
> manager takes samples says run anyway quality assurance can check in the morning
> notice samples in garbage on way past his office
> take one out and ask if QA had seen this
> QA manager loses his goddamn mind
> plant on emergency shutdown
Turns out that black contamination was carbon/Kevlar from the oven.
Major mechanical damage, not to mention health hazard in the product.
Manager cared more about production than safety.. Didn't report or follow up on anything.
Company had to:
> recall semitrailer of contaminated shit
> repair more extensive damage that could have been avoided
> pay ot to destroy product
> short the market and damage brand
Yeah.. They made a positive note on my file, and that manager "left to persue other opportunities" by the end of the week.
>>712743393
missoula international airport?
>>712744041
i'm typing this on a dell computer right now!!
>>712743303
More like
> be me
> make lots of money, spend it on hookers and blow
> life is good
> one day penis leaking puss
> panic
> go to doctor
> get medicine
> wife calls
> her vag leaking puss
> ohshit.exe
> we argue, I accuse her of cheating
> she leaves me, hires a better lawyer then me
> takes half my everything
> hang myself in my office
>>712744018
I don't know this.
¢ needs to adjusted by either 6 or 7 percent, as I understand. You might expect 5¢/minute in a year or so.
>>712744018
You're a fucking idiot and you're b8 game is awful
>>712738514
You're a chill dude. Respect.
>>712743119
Nah, anon is a good person with great work ethic. What a fucking bro, seriously.
>>712744064
nope nice try anon
>>712740718
>>712743120
You would round it up to .90
>>712744126
I really like your counters to that faggot, they're clever
>>712744126
A H H H H H
H
H
H
H
H
H
HH
H
H
H
H
H
H
H
>>712744152
you're the queer who thought you can flip proportions like an asshole.
>maths
>>712738514
You deserve more than a meal and a shitty gift card. If you ever leave, shit on the fucking grill.
>>712743605
fucking this. sport is great if you're fucking playing it, but these fagboats who literally cosplay as team members and just vomit stats and hypotheticals to eachother make me fuckign rage
>>712744292
>be me
>not same person who was trolling you
>just a construction worker who hates rich lawyer fags
>you people ruined America
>one day soon you will all be up against the wall with the politicians awaiting execution
>revolution made America great again
>feels good
Good thread keep it going
>>712743664
Stories from my time at sea:
>Be working on supply-vessel with all british engine-crew.
>They have no electrical training.
>Be told, that when we are within 500 meters of the rig, no major-systems repair are allowed.
>Small ship, and not alot to do.
>decide to change light bulbs one day.
>As I am walking out of the control-room the (dyslexic!) Chief Engineer ask what I am doing, and starts screaming at me, when he finds out, that I am about to change a 12v lightbulb.
>Claims that an earth-current of 0,4mA will make both the main engines clutch out.
>Main Engines are on a different circut, the cabinet is fully isolated - to current will be able to pass throught, clutches are both on a Normally Open control 20A, so they only clutch out, if the loose signal, not if they gain a signal.
>I don't even try to explain to him, why he is wrong.
>Later that day a remotely-controlled valve is having an off-set of 3% - so if set to 97% open, it only opens to 94%. This changes nothing what-so-ever in real life practice.
>We are under the rig. Still, Chief Engineer and 2.-Engineer decides to open it up.
>I tell them not too - they have no grounds for understanding it, we are under the rig, the current is live, we have no spare for the actuator if they break it, and there isn't any real problem, other than an insignificant offset.
>They go ahead and open it up anyway - as soon as they start fumbling with it, a thick smoke appears from the actuator.
>For the next three weeks it didn't work at all, untill we recieved a spare.
>>712744489
why hate richfags when every opportunity was also afforded to you? it makes you sound like niggers and spics.
>muh opression
>muh privilege
>>712736751
>be me
>window cleaner (own buisness )
Work in freezing fucking cold weather
Cleaning a bock of flats (£130)
Each time
Gotta get my glider pole out £1500
Get pole up to 45 foot dosey cunt opens bay window brush hits her face cuts she slams window shut braking my pole
Pole now stuck in fucking window
Go around press bell
She answers door with a fucking deep cut to the bone on her nose .
I sort insurance out with her while I'm talking her tard husband opens window pole falls on his merc fucks all bonnet up
>cost me 2 grand in insurance payments
Go home get stoned and a few beers
Police are at door "sir" we are arresting you for criminal damage fucking all that shit explain to them about insurance
>the fucking arseholes said I smashed the pole on car out of rage
I'm just waiting for cctv footage of accident
>a few days Kek
Worst day ever
Work at B&M, UK superstore, in paint & wallpaper. Some fucking idiot wants wallpaper sample. We usually give a metre, and no more. This jackass takes 10 metres. Take the wallpaper shit off him, he has a chimpout. Fucking Pakistanis, they won't pay for anything. He left empty-handed lol.
guess I should preface this with the fact that I've always had a latent fear of retarded people
there was this one kid in my cousins' estate that I heard loads of stories about growing up, him walking into people's houses, wanking in front of windows etc, but one thing I do know for certain is that when I was the ripe age of about 8 my cousin was put in hospital by the aforementioned retarded kid who beat the shit out of him with a metal bar
so while I doubted the former stories, I knew two facts growing up:
1. retarded people are scary
2. they are immune to justice
so
>work the tills in a TJ Maxx (called TK Maxx here in Ireland)
>mum and her tardo come up to the til
>the kid isn't physically malformed, her nose is massive and her face is particularly narrow but there was an air about her
>look into the mother's eyes as I say "hey, howre ya"
>oh no, I think
>we have an autism
>and then the kid lets loose
>the years of torment and hidden loathing surface on the mother's poor exasperated eyes
>the she beast of a child yells at me, screams that I need to hurry up
>hits her mother and pulls her hair for taking her shopping
>cries and yells about how she shouldn't have come and it's her mother's fault for being in a bad mood
>alternates between yelling at me and her mother as I pack her stuff (I can't remember what it was, just clothes I think because I was able to rush myself)
>the mother is silent the entire time
>"that's 86.95 please"
>the mother hands me two 50s, i give her change
>"good luck."
>she looks at me and smiles the smallest smile
the poor woman
>>712736751
>Jailer
>Have to be at jail by 5:00 AM
>Leave a little early so decide to stop into Steak N shake for delicious shooters
>wearing my department jacket/duty belt
>Sit down and imidently notice land whale staring at me
>ignore her and order my shooters
>Just as glorious mini burgers arrive at table. fats megee waddles up to me
>"Can I see your badge?"
>"wut"
>"You're a cop right? where is your badge?"
>"Im not a cop"
>"But you're dressed like one....Im gona need to see ur ID"
>"shake my head because im not in the mood for this and go back to eating my burgerz
>"Let me see your ID NOW!" she screams
>Ignore her and continue to eat my shooters
>she huffs before walking away iwin.jpg
>About 10 minutes later local PD arrive as landwhale starts screaming "HIM!"
>show them my jail ID
>we all start laughing
>fatty leaves in anger screaming something about sueing department for making light of her "emergency"
>MFW Everyone calls me Deputy Steak N Fake
>be me working as a bagger for kroger
>always do a fucking stellar job
>not sure why i tried so hard, i got paid 5 bucks an hour
>old gook comes through my line at 7am
>she has a small cart and only 3 items
>baby back ribs, milk, something else heavy
>notice she has her purse on the top shelf of the cart
>put her groceries on the bottom so i don't crush anything in her purse
>have a good day.jpg
>she comes back an hour later
>you didn't put my stuff in my cart blah blah
>where's your manager blah blah
>we argue back and forth, she places blame on me
>i tell her i put the shit on the bottom so i wouldn't crush her purse
>she gets angry instead of thanking me for taking her personal items into consideration
>manger says we have all your shit blah blah we found it in the cart
>lady never apologizes to me
how the fuck can you forget all your groceries when you only bought 3 in the first place? i'm so glad i quit that job
>>712743095
You don't get that much from disability. Also, how the fuck does one live off of 1K? I earn 10K a month and find it moderately enjoyable.
>>712744759
>be me
>grow up poor in Boston
>move to Baltimore
>can't afford college get good grades but not good enough for scholarship
>start working trade
>get good at trade
>get all licenses and certifications
>make $38 an hour
>buy a home
>better off then parents
>start taking care of parents
>lawyer cucks who need service treat you like second class citizen
>make you use "service door" of home not front door
>think they are better then me because they are lawyers
>they would be fucked if forced to do real labor or anything mechanical
>society is waking up to how the rich abuse the poor
>I'll believe a corporation is a person once Texas executes one
>America is waking up
>your days are numbered
>>712742048
>Be me
>Found my own law firm
>I'm also my own boss
>Voted for trump
>Try picking a winner, you fourthgender demifaggot cuck
>>712744971
wtf
>>712745104
Kek
>>712740718
"It costs 0.895" shut up they're cents .5 cents isn't a fucking thing you inbred
>>712736751
>work shitty callcentre job for home depot
>frontline complaints team
>call one day
>"You're in deep shit now boy" irish accent
>intrigued and amused
>"im Mr. Ryan from...." blah blah blah
>turns out hes budget airline magnate
>he also owns building sites because rich af
>builders tried to get supplies his card failed
>card system down
>builders think he has no money
>idiots leave the site and he loses days work
>quotes ridiculous compensation amount
>Requests a call in an hour
>he will have lawyers on conference call
>figure hes bluffing and agree
>call him back
>he has his entire legal team with him
>regret smoking a bowl in my lunchbreak
>Explain company stance on issue
>legal team butting in every few minutes
>im way too high for this
>Manage somehow to turn the tables
>Mr Ryan is getting furious, legal team quiet
>starts calling me stupid
>this is a favourite out
>if someones abusive you can terminate call
>"sir, you'll have to stop calling me that"
>says it again
>Hang up
Realise im sweating
>>712744695
>Be me.
>Working in greenland.
>Get a call that the offloading crane isn't working.
>Go to crane and open up electrical cabinet.
>Max Torque- and Motor-protecting has both flipped out. I reset them, and instruct personel to haul less.
>Fifteen minutes go by, and I am called again. Find out, that they have been hauling the same amount as before. I reset again, and tell them, the next time I won't reset it.
>Fifteen minutes go by, and I get a call from production manager, what is wrong with the crane. I explain to him, that nothing is wrong with the crane, they have just been hauling to much, making it max-out.
>The production manager claims, that they alway haul the said amount, and there has never been a problem.
>I go to the workshop and get the manual, go to Production Managers office, and using simple math, conservative estimates of weight, and the setpoint dictatated in the safety-certification, show him that the crane is set to max-out at the loads, he says it always hauls, and this is the way it is supposed work.
>He still claims, that is always hauls those loads, without any problem.
>Work at a gym chain
>Have very specific set of policies
>Everyone thinks they can do whatever they want because they're used to shitty other gyms
>Try to bring their friends in without even asking if it's allowed or if they have to pay a fee (it's not and they do)
>City is full of indians & packies
>They bring horrible B.O and curry stank wherever they go and the smell lingers for minutes
>Scan one in at the front desk and I have to hold my breath for the next 5 mins until the smell goes away
>Fire in the saunas every week because they're pouring water in there instead of letting it warm up (it's a dry sauna you don't add water)
>Sometimes they piss in the sauna and it has to be closed for days
>Get screamed at for denying sketchy fucks in without their pass or a photo i.d (we have no photos on member profiles)
>Caught an old man on camera last week jerking off in the pool
>All washers broken except one & everyone steals the towels so we never have any
>Get bitched at by old ladies for not having any towels despite them bringing in towels they 'forgot' to bring back almost daily.
>Class instructors walk in and give me dirty looks because they expect me to know who they are instead of simply saying 'I'm here to teach a class'
>District managers come in every so often and we have to act super gay and give the dirty packies who barely speak english a cheery greeting, ask about their workouts, and say their name which most of the time I can't pronounce
>Scummy parents trying to get their ugly kids into the daycare for free, and when I finally get them to pay they always have $20 bills and demand change for their $2 fee
>Most of the staff is pretty chill though and one of my managers is a huge bodybuilder who has my back whenever he's there
>>712743095
Who's cooler than you?
>>712745393
you forgot the part where you put your dick on the clean towels and the new guy cums all over them but people dont know
>>712744842
There cunts anon
>every time in in bnm it's old folk buying shit
>scrotey chav cunts shoplifting
>and dole wallers
But there's always a fucking imagrant bartering over price
>>712745099
You spend money on stupid shit do you? 2K would be plenty for me.
>>712743540
Because we all live in the same fucking country right.
Fucking idiot.
>>712745353
i stopped reading your stories because you're arrogant enough to believe you, being new on a ship, know more about the ship than the chief fucking engineer. gtfo idiot.
OP back:
>Working for McDs
>don't hate it
>actually kind of like it
>coworkers are chill
>get a douche couple come thru my window
>"Ok so you got [insert order here]"
>"You have a computer in front of you. You should know what we order."
>"I'm well aware of this sir, but sometimes we get messed up and we like to repeat the order."
>"just stop talking, you're only digging yourself a deeper hole"
>Shut the window
>find manager
>tell her I'm not dealing with them
>Work at McDs (still)
>managers are 5 years younger than me
>17-22
>Me 24
WHY?
We literally had/have 10 managers there and 5 on staff AT ALL TIMES!
My mom is a waitress at waffle house (don't judge), and she has 2 bosses and only 1 works there at a time. Even then, it's only for like 5 hours a day to count the draw then she's gone.
WHY does McD need 10 god damn managers?
>McDs again
>supposed to get off at 11
>11:05
>everyone fucking leaves
>3 people called in
>some sportsball game comes in
>20 cars drive to the windows
>we run out of 50% of shit
>people gettin mad
>Suppose to get off at 11
>wasn't going to leave my nice chill manager with the anxiety atk
>Help her out
>we had to shut the store down cause we ran out of shit
>tell everyone in the line that we are closed
>people gettin mad
>people can't figure out there's another store 3 minutes down the road
>tell a nigger lady this "NAH AYE BIN SITTN HE-YA, IMMA GIT MAYE FUD!"
>>712745099
120k a yaer
>>712743095
>>712743540
>>712745099
Uh, no. Absolutely possible to get that much from disability. Maximum possible benefits are over 3k.
>>712745566
I consider it every time I do laundry but I don't like the idea of it being random. Not everybody who comes in is a shithead.
My real revenge is being a dick to people who are in the wrong & denying them entry, especially if my manager is there to tell them to fuck off.
Last one:
>Be me
>McDs
>Nigger Manager
>douche canoe with gang tats and shit
>Me, Can't lift more than 40 pounds above my head
>Not ashamed of this cause I'm not retarded
>tell me manager
>"so you lied on your application?"
>"A job is more important than being able to lift a bucket of ice sometimes."
>Get a female coworker who is clearly bigger than me
>I'm ok with this
>"So you had a girl do it for you?"
>"Sure, why not?"
>"She's a woman! She's not meant to do that shit!"
>"That's sexist."
>"No it's not!"
>Tell him the definition of sexist
>Thinks I'm full of shit
>become the butt of his joke for almost a week
>Finally get sick of it
>tell corp"we are sorry we cannot help you, that is a franchise store"
>Head of McDs can't help me
>quit and now working at the bowling alley
Plus these assholes weren't giving me hours for no reason. come to find out, this 1 chick who is 17 (currently) was one of my managers. What pissed me off is that she was one of the girls I yelled at the pool when I was the pool monitor. I didn't know who she was. It pisses me off CAUSE she is a fucking child compared to me and acts like she's better than me.
Bitch you still aint got a handle on your period and emotions and you think you can be a manager... No fuck you
>>712737835
Get other employees to submit reports in mass to HR. If they are swamped with complaints about him they'll have to act.
>>712745353
>Be me.
>Get a call from production-department, that one of our block-freezer (freezes fish into squares) isn't cooling down fast enough.
>Go to said freezer - it is in the process of freezing down.
>Ask lead-worker how long they have been freezing - he doesn't know.
>Ask lead-worker, how long it usually takes to cool down to temperature - he doesn't know.
>Ask lead-worker, why he suspects that it isn't cooling down fast enough, to which he answers: "it isn't cooling down as fast a usual."
>I ask him, how fast he thinks it should cool down - he doesn't know.
>I leave in a fit of rage.
>Come back ten minutes later to apologize, and pretend I intend to examine the freezer - bring with me thermometer.
>As I examine the freezer, it is cooling a -24C - the minimum requirement is -18C.
>Lead-worker still claims it isn't cooling sufficiently.
>Leave in a fit of rage.
>>712743071
>he reinstalled 3 of those progs
>he paid for em
Lost it
>>712745959
>>tell me manager
tell another manager
Fuck, I R retard.... I take that back
>>712745683
It was a crane not a ship
>>712741543
Subtle bait.
>>712745099
Highly doubt you earn that much and only find it moderately enjoyable. I'm at 11k/m in Los Angeles and love life.
>>712745683
An electrian usually knows more about electrics, than people who aren't electrians. (^:
>>712745627
some middle eastern towelhead wanted to haggle. Paint tin dented. Still full price to you, Abdul. He went batshit crazy.....Sigh
>>712738514
Ask for a raise.
>>712743503
Not thinking it through, they'll find more shit for you to do for that $23 and hour, eventually.
>>712743071
>>has to -run- to freezer every hour to switch out the cold packs its resting on
lmao I did this when I had a shitty laptop.
>>712744489
I'm not the same person who you thought was being trolled by the person who you trolled in turn.
On a shitty UK checkout.... barcode doesn't scan.
Asswipe / dickhead customer says "Can I have that for free?"
No you cannot...you chavvy twat / you plebian asshole.
>be me
>work in a pizza restaurant
>2 months pass by and they hire a hot chick
>she's not totally incompetent but not very good at her job
>flirts with everyone
>gets a raise before I do
>tell the manager I'll quit because of that BS
>just gives me a raise without question to keep me because I pick up people's shifts/stay longer to help others
>she starts crying and says that I got it because I'm a male
>I tell her to go off herself in the freezer
>she cries for hours in the freezer, pretty much gets paid to cry and doesn't get it trouble
Females in the workplace piss me the fuck off.
>>712746501
The plot thickens
>>712745260
>>712745101
> get good grades
> better off then parents
>>712737835
Hey, dude. If you wanna possibly get a promotion, here's what you do. Go through the SOP manuals during some down time at work, or even during personal time. Find out the spots where your current process differs from the SOP and make notes of the difference and why your current method is an improvement. Present those notes to the supervisor above your dick boss, and you might see yourself in a process improvement position.
>>712744695
It's a good thing electrical engineering has nothing to do with spelling.
>>712745662
>own a flat
>drive three cars
>go partying with 10/10s
>300K in savings
Yeah, sucks to be me. Honestly, I know how shit 1K or 2K is, coming from there. And it really sucks, no doubt about it.
>>712745099
Throughout the progression of my life/career, making more money didn't mean anything other than my expenses and responsibilities going up with it.
While I do save more, making more money just meant I was able to take on things like a house payment, which in turn added more expenses. That and the added taxes on the additional income and property.
Not to mention adding a kid to the mix.
This is why the middle class is going away.
tldr: I was able to get by on a lot less and it didn't feel any different making $30k a year than it feels making $175k a year.
>>712746733
My point was I've done well in life with what I was given. Richfags treat middle class like 2nd class citizens. They wouldn't be rich fags without us. Soon we will burn them all at the stake.
Count your days rich fags, count your days.
>>712737835
Are you fuckin 15 or what. That's life, get over with it man
>>712746854
None of that should consume 10K monthly, you indeed do some stupid shit
>>712736751
>work tgi fridays job during college
>Work late hours with early starts
>everyone is off their face on drugs
>Broiler guy has a heroin habit and a penchant for stealing steaks
>Fry is always tripping or smoking weed with a bong hidden by his station
>basically every station is manned by a psychonaut
>I cannot explain how much like the film "waiting" its actually like there
>Fun game to play is to expose yourself to co-workers in amusing ways
>one guy climbs up on racking and dangles his junk down
>calls co-worker whos in another part back-of-house
>he comes round the corner unknowingly
>I guess the idea was he was gonna slap his balls on his face or something
>NOPE
>his hands slip, instead of a gentle teabagging he falls facefirst onto the floor
>tries to brace impact with hands, breaks both wrists
>Rolling around on the floor with his cock out unable to cover himself up
>found by the managers like this. a legend was born
This always makes me wonder...
>One day weed guy has early shift with me
"hey anon lets make some weed pancakes to start the day"
>Sure why not
>no customers this early so he whips up some
>"these'll be pretty strong, anon, today'll be fun"
>leaves them warming on expo, which is like where the waiting staff take food from
>go out back for cigarette
>come back in and the pancakes are gone
>someone had ordered pancakes
>no one orders this early
>Guy looks like a typical executive, flashy suit and sleek german car
>He ate with no complaint and left
>Always wonder what happened to him afterwards his day wouldve been jacked
>>712747098
I would watch a movie based on this premise.
>be me
>work in sex industry
>boss said I can have thanksgiving off but not Black Friday
>no where to go / no one to have thanksgiving with
>boss's wife invites all the boys over for thanksgiving tomorrow
>feels good
>>712747372
Pretty much exactly like "Waiting"
This isnt even a fraction of tehn stuff that went on
>>712743303
More like,
>Be you
>Be 15
>Watch Law and Order once
>Pretend to be lawyer
>Bait people on 4chan
>>712747619
moar
>>712741308
Kek
>>712747619
I was thinking more about the executive with the sleek german car.
Imagine all the ramifications that could come from eating THC pancakes without knowing it. It could be a comedy or a drama or even a thriller if the screenwriter did it right.
work in care home, pissy ass residents
light blunt, fuck em.
>>712747797
>that pancake was great
>everything is great
>I want more pancakes
And then, on that day, he spent $700 on pancakes in the local region, hitting every single restaurant chain and business that made them.
>>712745404
this guy >>712743071
>>712744060
Gotta love that feeling tho anon
>>712744829
i literally read this in an english accent. Fuck anon I hope those douches got what they deserved. Did it turn out better at least?
>>712745301
>be me
>Call EA
>Can't play the Sims 3 on PC
>get a fucking dot head
>tell him the issue
>computer can't seem to run origin any more cause my computer is "out of date"
>getting very mad
>tell him I want to play the sims and I know for a fact that this game CAN and WILL run on here cause it did the week before they updated Origin
>getting mad but trying to keep my cool
>"Sur yew wheel need to calm down"
>"This is as close to calm as I'm getting"
>"Sur aye cahnaught elp yew eef yew due not calm down"
>"DO NOT tell me what to do" I snap. Let me speak to your supervisor
>*CLICK!*
No he fuckin did not.
>call back "I would like to speak to your supervisor"
>Finally talk to one, tells me he's sorry for his dumbass employee
>tell him that I literally have talked to EA on twitter on PM about EVERYTHING
>Get ignored for almost a week and no messages back
>Tells me they will look into it
>never get a call back
>Never get an email
I fucking hate EA
I fucking hate the god damn middle east.
"I picture the middle east as a bunch of curry and call centers" - Stewie
>>712746702
God damn anon! 1 1/2 penny? Shit!
>>712747098
that last one anon. Fucking yes
>>712747098
Since when does TGIF serve breakfast?
>>712743071
I thought FUBAR meant Fucked Up Beyond Any Repair but it's actually a word..
>be me
>project manager
>ceo thinks i made everything and since i am on this seat we are 3x faster
>at 7-8 a.m. i write mails with orders to workers
>if someone can't do something i forward his mail to ceo, to show, that we need to fire him
>i just outsorced most complicated things in our projects
>I keep contact to outsource guys to myself, and we fired quite few our own workers
>now we can't make projects without outsources
>almost all outsources all my friends from highschool, or last job, so low prices for projects are low, because of me
>ceo is mad, but now he can't fire me :D
>>712748172
>buying shit from EA
That's what torrenting is for. Anyone who willingly gives this shit-tier company money is a moron and deserves to be screwed over
>Be me
>Be 16 year old autist with no people skills working in a music store
>Guy walks in from the back hallway where music lessons are given and starts screaming at me because he just drove from 45 minutes away and the piano teacher isn't here today
>His little kid is sulking in the corner
>I go to the back and see that the teacher cancelled for the day and there is a record for each student as to whether we got a hold of them with cancellation notice
>See that there is a note that we left this guy a message on his answering machine
>it's in my handwriting
Fuck.jpg
>Apologize to the guy and tell him I don't know what happened
>He cusses me out and storms out of the store
>Next day the manager tells me the guy called and said his idiot kid deleted the message and that he was sorry
>Next week he comes in and gives me the most akward cringe face ever as he walks by
Pic related
>Have to see this guy every week until I go to college
>He's always cringing and walking on egg shells when he sees me
>One week he comes in and I'm fixing the electronics on a guitar
>"Is it going to live? Heh heh"
>Akward cringe face
>"I think so, heh heh heh!" as spaghetti falls out of my pockets
>Give him cringe face in return
>>712742048
>Be me
>A huge fucking faggot
>Live in parents basement
>Pretend to be successful lawyer online
>Insult people with different political views on anonymous image board
wew lad
>>712747705
K heres some more TGI fridays experiences
>Find out coworker is leaving for a normal job like a normal person
>We didnt like seeing one of the bros go
>all our deliveries come in wire trolleys called "cages"
>Never has a name been so apt
>Proceed to locate leaving co-worker. they know whats coming
>Fight the good fight, hold two of us off with a broomhandle
>The struggle is futile, sheer numbers prevail
>also the front of house staff member whose a professional wrestler
>slowly walk the now captured co-worker to the waiting cage
>he goes limp, accepting his fate. he knew the ritual
>close him in the cage, then proceed to bring out the egg-yellow
>egg-yellow is like fake egg substitute for omelette and things
>stuff will stain skin for days, no matter how much scrubbing
>pour it through the cage bars on the victim, theyre trying hard to avoid it, rocking around
>its just making it worse on him
>Next the dish boys bring over their present
>all the disgusting waterlogged scraps of old food and congealed sauces
>that gets dumped on them too
>Finally there stations are trashed meaning more cleanup when they leave.
>be end of day, longer for them because of cleanup
>go to change into their normal clothing
>realise its gone
>we had them hosed down in water and left in siberia
>siberia is the coldest walk in freezer known to man
>laugh at co-worker whose yellow, smells bad
>and trying to beat their clothing from rigid and straight
>into something soft and wearable
>the final insult is freezing their car keys into a block of ice
>"bye bro, we'll miss you"
Everyone who left went through this
>>712748175
I dont know if its the same for you, but this was a UK restaurant about 12 years ago
>>712748659
If this happened to me I would sue everything and everything
>>712736751
>Don't blame the nigger, mostly cause it's 3.18 for a drink... a normal Styrofoam cup
>Be 18yo me
>Work at Kennedy Space Center on the launch pads for the space shuttle
>First day at work
>Get assigned to work with this welder nicknamed 9inch boots
>Nickname came from one of his boots being taller than the other to compensate for his short leg because of a fall he took.
>Run around on the pad fetching tools and other materials for 9inch boot and other welders.
>9inch boots and a painter are both in high lifts working on the upper level of the pads.
>Painter asks me to plug in his air hose
>9inch decides to be funny
>"Don't ask him for anything, he doesn't know shit"
>9inch doesn't like newbro's
>Break time is approaching, 9inch is an avid smoker.
>idea.jpg
>"Hey 9inch! I don't know how to do anything eh? Guess I don't know how to do this"
>Flip the key to the off position on his lift and throw the key in the bucket
>Cursing and throwing of tools ensues
>Take lunch break
>Come back and 9inch is still in the basket cursing me.
>Foreman comes up to me and asks me if I locked him in the lift.
>"Yep. He was talking shit"
>mfw the foreman laughs
>mfw the foreman is my father law
Got reassigned to some cool welders after that.
>Be in Britbong Air Force
>Prince Charles was supposed to be visiting one day
>They make up pick up every dead leaf because it's Autumn
>High ranking officer says it looks "unnatural"
>Makes us get the bag of dead leaves out of the skip and strategically scatter them around to make it look "natural"
>My friends had to paint stones all day
>Prince Charles never shows up
>>712745353
There's your mistake
Trying to use facts
> be me
> work shitty phone support on commercial microwaves
> I deal with the end users
> authorized servicers have their own line
> get call from local shitsville retards r us untrained servicer
> complains that the microwave is overheating
> create file, blah, blah, blah
> find out he's running it with nothing in it
> tell him that he's risking damage to the microwave and that if it's overheating while food is in it to call us back
> "but I've done it before"
> sir, this is not how a microwave is supposed to be used and we will not have it serviced because you're not using it properly
> "I've done it before"
> sir you are microwaving the microwave but I can give you an authorized servicer and you can have it evaluated at your expense and if they determine that it's a defect then we can see about in warranty service after they send us their evaluation
Fucker is still probably out there cooking microwaves
>>712748780
>UK
Probably the difference. I've never seen one in the US that served breakfast. I got excited too, I bet they'd have good breakfast.
>>712748541
This was before I was aware that EA was shit anon. I regret it. I don't mind, the Sims is one of my favorite series and I will support it. They are doing ok, But The shit all over 4. If I had known, I would of bought it from Steam instead but im sorta fucked with my game where it is.
>>712748571
the good part is you're honest anon~
>>712748593
will you 2 fuckin stop
>>712748659
god damn it, that's funny as shit
>>712748890
I'd rather not get in trouble considering I need this job...
It's your average ... 8..ounce... cup...With ice 1/2 a coke
>>712748948
That sounds awesome
>>712748659
You're all a bunch of niggers. I'm surprised people even give two weeks there.
>>712742527
your manager is a god amongst men it sounds like
>be me
>lots of work to do
>day before weekend break
>fuckit.exe
>4chan lal day
>>712749185
Not a nigger, maybe nigging.
Despite all the initiations and things that went on, it was hilarious times. I got more fucked up than I've ever been with some of those guys, and the strange thing is we've all gone on and done really well. Sure, there were crazy and uncivilised, but lifes for living, with all its experiences. I'd do them all again
>>712737922
German detected
>>712742527
Ayy working in tires shop are fun.
>be me
>work in local neighbourhood repairing computers and shit
>finish uninstalling adware and crap from a bunch of windows xp netbooks
>go to get payed
>guy hands me several black bags full of pennies
>for a £10.20 job
>mfw I have no car and had to drag 4 bags of pennies back to my house in the middle of the night.
part 2 of my thread anons:
Post something that you want to tell people about your work SO fucking bad
>>712749771
>Could have refused them
Pennies are only legal tender up to 20p, can't use any more in one transaction
Source: Coinage Act 1971
>>712749410
Are you me?
>>712749833
Sharp is dog shit
I've got a friend that helps Fortune 500 companies find what they're looking for
He listens when I tell him that they've been making inferior products and even had a class action lawsuit for price fixing
He gets his clients to buy Samsung instead
I've probably cost them more money than anyone not in management and all I do I is tech support
>>712750085
Possibly
>>712737922
i have a hard time believing this story
>>712750163
>>712750011
It was a bad work day and I just wanted to get payed.
I was able to get all of the pennies cashed into notes a few days later, I pretty much just walked into a store with a fucking wheelbarrow full of pennies.
>weird looks when in the shop but I got the £10
>>712749833
(Also I mean about your work)
>>712750147
This is true. I have a samsung monitor I use for my Wii U and I do not regret it
>>712750236
Not that anon (OP actually), I live in GA. We get these type of niggers all the time
>do parking enforcement at a uni
>usually pretty chill job, rarely interact with people
>find car with about $3000 in outstanding fines racked up
>tow it (outstanding fines are the only reason my office tows cars)
>guy shows up at office
>red.faced bulging veim on forehead livid
>starts in on a wild rant about fascism and police states
>front desk lady says he only needs to pay the tow fee ($150) to get his car back but will be banned from parking at uni until the remainder in paid or he signs up for monthly payment plan
>that is normal procedure. Uni is more easy going about this than the police impound lot
>guy continues rant
>literally starts crying
>leaves without paying a cent
Never saw him again. We released the car to police after it had been in our lot for 30 days. I dunno what happened after that. Usually people are mad about getting towed but they knew it was coming and carried on parking illegally anyway. This guy though, he was special.
>be me
>work at wal-mart as a cart bitch
>go help this fat old couple who need a carry out
>its a mattress
>spent 10 min contemplating if the twin sized mattress will fit in the twin sized bed-frame
>whole time waiting i was contemplating suicide
>>712750404
>Live in Georgia
Me too and you're absolutely right. My problem with the story is why would you approach the kids immediately instead of waiting to see if they pay for it when they leave. It actually does seem pretty racist. People snack while shopping all the time.
>be me
>professor
>dumb girl comes to office hour
>wants help to get grade up
>too dumb to actually help
>but sexy big titties and tight booty
>perhaps she could suggest some kind of barter
>maybe letting me suck dem titties would bring her up to a C
>maybe letting me tongue punch that fartbox would mean a B
>but no, it doesn't occur to her
the shit I put up with
>>712750654
I FUCKING HATE THAT!
My EX did that shit. I told her not to. "You're going to buy it anyways."
"Hunny, it looks bad. It looks like you're stealing."
After that she never did it again.
Buford GA whaddup fam?
>>712750793
It's not stealing unless you leave the store without paying. Why do you think they have cold single drinks strategically placed throughout the store?
Warner Robins, unfortunately.
>>712743195
What's this about then, m8?
>>712750898
i still dont like the idea.
>>712743303
Do lawyers usually have such low self esteem that they feel the need to be validated by edgy teenagers on 4chan?
>>712750790
What a cunt.
>>712750969
Yes.
This is a true story.
>Be me
>roadie for alien ant farm
>half way through tour, good times so far
>drummer picks up this 6/10 groupie at last nights show
>they bang a ton
>she rides the bus with us to the next show
>and the next
>and the next
>she's annoying as fuck, never shuts up, screams when talking, geeks out over everything
>we ask the drummer "you done with her yet?"
>he says yes
>on road to next show, she needs to stop and pee
>we stop at a gas station
>she gets out and goes inside to pee
>no one else gets off tour bus
>we tell the driver to hit the road
>we leave her at the gas station
>picked her up in Florida, now we are in North Carolina
>>712742048
You must have some interesting stories.
>>712736751
>work at a military commissary one summer
>work in the produce department, mostly unloading, sometimes stocking
>a lot of our customers are old, so they can be fickle
>one day im carting a pallet of watermelon to a front display
>old man comes up to me and asks if we have any yellow watermelon (it was a one-time special over the summer)
>tell him no, we won't have any more for the rest of the year
>he says he doesn't believe me, tells me to ask my manager
>manager says we don't
>tell him this
>"you're just lazy, aren't you?"
>no, we just don't have any fucking yellow watermelon
this continues every couple days for three weeks, until:
>consolidating watermelon pallets at the front
>yellow watermelon guy walks up to me
>"so do you have any now"
>"no sir, like i said before, we won't have any until next summer. if you'd like to request a special order we can submit that for you"
>tells me im lazy for not just ordering it
>"i dont have the authority to make any ordering decisions, and anyway, most of our inventory is established by DeCA contract, meaning we have minimal say in getting strange or special items in, they just ship them to us when its convenient for them"
>"you really expect me to believe that"
>"yes"
>"y'know, i've been coming to this commissary for x years and it's gotten worse every single year. the problem is that you and your managers are incompetent"
>"oh okay, would you like to speak to one of the managers sir?"
>"no"
>"is there anything else i can do for you?"
>"yeah, do you have any red peanuts?"
>"i don't know what that is, so i don't believe so, but i can check"
>"oh, you must not be from here, everyone who lives in florida knows what a red peanut is"
>"i've actually lived here my entire life"
>"i doubt that highly"
>talk to other employees, most dont know what a red peanut is, everyone agrees we dont have it
why do old people have to be so fucking rude? i'd met double amputees that had a better life outlook than him.
>>712741179
>>Takes customer to empty shelf
kek
>>712746897
Because your fucking stupid that's why. No sense of money management. I hate people like you. Die in a fucking fire. Complaining about not being able to live comfortably on 175k.
>>712749045
Good times.
>>712736751
>opticians
>old ass MF comes in
>90+
>stinks of piss
>shaved but missed tonnes of hair
this means he can't see
>two odd shoes
definitely can't see
>have to help in and out of chair
>do bitchin sight test
>shouting at this nigga all the way through
>BARELY meets driving standard
>help out of chair
>doesn't get new glasses but needs to meet driving standard
>takes 30 mins to walk to car
>gets in car and drives home
Nothing I can do about it, but it's not the first time I've seen old fuckers who shouldn't drive, drive. IMO anyone over 80 needs to hand their licence in, fucking liabilities.
>>712742554
Same bullshit. That and I get one lady in my station, once a week, and asks if we sell wine. And every week its the same, "no, but go this way and you'll find it at this place." Plus we got new pumps and for some reason nobody knows how to use a card but its like magic when i slide it once and it somehow works. "How'd you do that?" By doing it the same as the old pumps. Magic. People are retarded.
>>712745101
Chuckled at the Texas comment
>>712751632
I'm currently recovering from getting hit by some old fucker in a buick. I can barely even walk and I've been off work for a month. Please god kill me.
>>712736751
Thanks OP, this is the best thread I've seen this week
>be security at shipping facility
>decent pay, invisible boss
>see on cctv some young shits skating a sweet ledge behind a building
>notonmytimefaggots.png
>get in golf cart to pursue suspects
>come hauling ass around building
>kid screams bail
>kid losses board
>I run for it
>just before kid grabs it, I jump on and start pushing like a motherfucker
>look back. Kid in disbelief
>flip him off
>other kids shiting themselves laughing
>bring kids board back
>tell them have fun, don't break shit
> $10hr
>I DON'T GIVE A FUCK
>>712751978
Not all hero's wear capes
>>712751797
yeah same thing at a couple of retail/service type jobs i have jad in the past
>customer: your machine is broken!
>go look at it, it's not showing any errors
>take customer step by step through payment process
>it works first try
>customer: well of course it works when you're here. I did the exact same thing and it didn't work.
Uh huh.
>>712740767
>>712740580
How is life with zero sense of humor?
>>712740580
>cause they got laid at their Highschool prom, they are the shit
I can almost physically feel the jealousy.
>>712750957
We shall agree to disagree, Georgia bro.
>>712751848
Its horseshit man. We should have the power to stop people driving who shouldn't. We used to be able to call the cops years ago, but times change. When did you get hit?
>>712736751
I feel you anon. I'm a bartender, and seeing how stupid/inconsiderate ppl are truly amazes me every time.
>>712743195
what the fuck
elaborate/speak fucking english?
>>712752235
A month ago. I was going into work when I got hit.
Mangled my leg, gonna be quite awhile before I'm able to work again.
>>712745959
Your life is pathetic. You were 24 working at mcd and now a bowling alley.
>>712743071
>>colleague spend the next fifteen fucking minutes trying to explain that the OK was to continue
>>and not an "OK, I want More information"
lmao
>>712741297
They only tipped $3 because they already greased your manager's palm with 10-20x that.
>>712752364
Did they catch the buick?
>>712738354
>swamps us with work while shes out back doing god knows what
What kind of work do you get swamped with at fucking Walmart besides customer?
>>712746702
>Australia.
>>712751089
Jesus Christ I'm sorry. All they want to do is play music and listen to their fans praise them then you get this dumbshit
what is the band like tho?
>>712751115
These fuckers are from a time when "respect" was given to old ass fuckers who "road the rails" type of deals, the type that had the "hardships" They think cause their old they can push people like you and me around. They think shit like ADHD, OCD, depression is something made up or you "get over." Being rude is like 2nd nature to them.
My grandfather was this way till he died. When he took his meds, he was like Dr. Jeckle and Mr Hide type of deal...
>>712751632
Wasn't there a South Park ep or a Family guy ep on this??
>>712751951
You're welcome anon. I'll try to cont it if we get 10'd out. I do this once in a while and last as long as possible.
>>712752178
a since of humor is fine anon, it's learning to know WHEN and WHAT is funny. This is childish "Hey guys xDDD I'mma smack my balls across his face!" Sure, real mature.
>>712752227
oh well.
Anywho the fuck you from brah?!?!?!?!?
>>712752249
We have some nice fuckin bartenders. I've never met a dick bartender. You dude make some nice fuckin money. Our main dude came in with 30 buck sushi from Kani House
>>712752398
I'm aware, I'm not proud of it but I'm trying my best at what I can get. Honestly, I do like my job at the Bowling alley as a cook. We have a nice kitchen. Nice staff. Most everyone is chill. Most of the time we just have to tell the customers we can't take order but only hand out food and tell you where the restrooms are.
I enjoy cooking. I wanted to get a Masters in it but aint got no money...
Also no, I am 24, I quit McDs within a month. It's not that the company is bad, it's just ran poorly
>>712752178
But, my life still has humor. I just don't laugh when someone says pussy dick titfart in another language anymore.
That's like looking up cuss words in a French dictionary. It was cool when it was new. Now, it's just French.
>>712752682
>a since of humor
Maybe you are just not intelligent enough to understand the jokes.
>>712749139
You people that respond to every fucking post are the worst, go make some friends and stop trying to make us pay attention to you
>>712752777
>Don't get the balls on face joke
No, cause I'm not a faggot who is in shitty frats laughing at fart jokes
>>712752800
I responded to people I wanted to responded to. Get over it
>>712752682
I already said Warner Robins mayne.
>>712752800
>stop trying to make us pay attention to you
>posting in a thread on /b/ instead of making friends
>not being forced to browse /b/ or stay in the thread
Son.
>>712745959
You do know that minimum wage jobs are not long term living solutions? Perhaps when you look around and you are 5 years older than the managers you should feel ashamed. There is supposed to be a progression to careers that result in you being more productive and better compensated.
Just reading your stories makes me sad. I had similar experiences when I was 16. Please do something outside your comfort zone and try to grow a little. Retiring on welfare with no savings will be sad. Also, what will you do when you can't live with your parents?
>>712752800
Same dickhead that bought in to EA, what do you expect
>>712745301
That's pretty cool. I saw a comedian tell a funny story about the time he was the announcer at some event with him. Lots of jokes at Mr Ryan's expense.
https://youtu.be/1NHZGoXt9N0
>>712752682
Yeah, then all the vets fought back.
>>712752682
They where ok.
The singer has a stupid big ego and no patience at all but the rest of the band where cool. The drummer was the best, he knows they are a "cover hit wonder". His choice in women sucks tho. He bangs any girl that will bang him.
>be me
>working as dishwasher in chinese buffet
>day consist of me dunking dishes and silverware in water and lightly gliding over them rubbing just enough to get rid of visible food marks.
>no one really conversates just works
>be cool with old korean guy who mops floor
>usually we eat the leftovers after closing
>one day buffet is crowded and staff is rushing back and forth
> waitress bumps into cook frying crab cakes
> Oil goes flying
>Ching Chong goes flying
> Korean bro runs a 40 yard dash in 2.1
> dives and saves me
Korean bro becomes bro for life.
>>712752881
OH mybad, I didn't know what that meant. well bummer, never heard of that city. There are so many fuckin counties here
>>712752927
I would anon. Trust me. I'm trying to find a good path for me. I want to goto college but the issue is that it cost so much fuckin money and if I told you more about my life then I already have, you'd just want to laugh and feel sorry for me. I'd rather not go into detail. Where I live, (dunno if the GA bro knows this) but it's extremely hard to find a job. A lot of places say they are hiring but it's not true. You have to LOOK the part. Most businesses are not in it for your knowledge of the company. They want drones, they want people who can look and "act" the part and when shit hits the fan and they dont know it, you're in deep shit and you have to handle the dumb people at the counter cause you didn't train them. Now, I agree, I hate working for these places to an extent but at the same time, I'm ok with it, as long as I have an enjoyable staff to work with. The whole, elevating stress. These punk ass kids are literally in Highschool, I don't know why they get it. These kids NEVER had a job before and they work there like 3 months and they get a fuckin manager position. And it's not the first time I've heard this shit either.
>>712752937
>I'm a dickhead
Anon, in my defense, I was unaware of a lot of the shit EA had pulled. I wasn't a "hardcore" gamer then (not now either, I play what I can get) and I didn't pay much attention to EA.
The only series' I like are the Sims and the Alice series from EA. That's it. Those are the only 2 games in my origin acc.
(I was given a free copy of Alice but I have it on steam)
>>712753140
remind them of the Vietnam war
>>712753209
That's pretty sad. At least have SOME standards...
>>712753412
Down by Macon
>>712736751
what the fuck is a job
pic related: me
>>712753441
Isn't Macon Nigger territory?
>be me
>be government contractor
>routinely sit it on meetings to discuss how to unfuck things for the government using solutions they've already paid for or have developed
>watch as every single time nothing gets done because 2 or more government blowhards refuse to agree on something and who work for different organizations/leadership so they wont be made to work it out
>months of emailing back and forth to try and have another meeting to unfuck the problem
>rinse and repeat
>literally cannot fix problem because federal employees are retarded and are very difficult to fire for performance reasons
This is why your government operates at the speed of syrup.
>>712738838
>steal their magnets
screwing assholes, getting magnets?
sign me the fuck up
>>712736751
Cook at a college town bar/pizza shop.
Drunk assholes at least once a week puke all over the place, refuse to leave, punch out windows, get 911 called, etc.
Get super busy with a late-night rush, pumping out orders as fast as I can, group of 3 niggers come back into the kitchen demanding there food be ready NOW! I don't see their names on any of my tickets, so they either already got their food or they're lying. I tell them it will be ready when it's ready, they stand there and stare at me for 15 mins while I'm cooking other peoples food. Eventually me and the rest of the kitchen crew just told them to fuck off, they got no food. fuck them.
>>712753412
I almost felt bad for the girl.
But like did she honestly think we where going to just drive her back to Florida after the tour?
She must have thought she was dating dude man after fucking him. I can't imagine any other reason why you would just willingly stay on a tour bus getting further and further from home.
>>712753669
I wouldn't doubt if she is that type. "OMG WE FUCKED WE ARE SOOOO DATING!! xDD"
>why would you do this
Escaping your own reality and truth *flips my emo hair*
>>712753476
kys you fat greedy bitch
a job is what people like us do so you can stuff your face
what do you think food grows on trees
there are people suffering for your gluttony whether you realize it or not so fucking end your life
>>712750526
He told his parents someone stole his car and they bought him another one.
You know in your heart it's true. Sucks don't it.
Run an artist co-op. We've got glass blowers, metal and blacksmiths, painters, weavers.
You can come in, walk around, see the artists working and shit.
>I make jewelry.
>customer wanted a stainless steel bracelet
>working on it on a weekend while theres a big open house going on.
>girl and boyfriend come in
>she loves the bracelet
>"how much would you charge for one like that?"
>"450 for this size, if you want it narrower or with larger rings, price goes down."
>girl looks at bf
>he pipes up
>"four hundred dollars for a bunch of metal rings?"
>grab a baggy, dump a handful of rings into it
>hand him the baggy
>"rings are free, its four hundred for assembly"
>go back to work
>>712753836
Food does grow on trees, it just isn't free anon.
>>712753836
>what do you think food grows on trees
>>712743605
I look at it this way.
In old times smart people were lords
Big retarded oaths were only good at swinging swords (sports)
>Be me
>Be the best draftsman in a major engineering company.
>Try to teach co-workers how to do shit.
>they literally cannot
>Ask for engineering time to create tools to boost efficiency
>forever told "after latest project"
>if I could create these tools, we'd save hundreds of man hours per year, maybe thousands.
>idgaf at this point, just a way to feed my addiction to firearms.
Sooner I go freelance the better.
>>712753478
There is a huge amount of them but there are also totally segregated areas that are rich whites, so pretty much like ATL. Anyway I'm not in Macon just near. WR is like 20 more minutes south.
>>712754008
fuck you
>>712753948
yes this man gets my point!!! dear >>712753476 : you're a fat piece of shit, stop mooching off the entire country, people like you are the reason most people you see out and about are going hungry!!!!!! in a country with so much food everyone should be slightly overweight, only to the degree of maximal health and comfort and no further, and we'd STILL have a lot left over, but NO, everyone has to be SKINNY and ATTRACTIVE so ugly feminist cunts like YOU can just eat all you want!!!!!!
>>712753909
God I have that shit. Fuck doing commission work ever again.
>>712744829
Dude, how big was the block ? I get £280 for a small block of flats
>>712745260
get raped, fag
>>712746702
>>712746702
>>712753486
I work in .gov and the hardest part of my job is getting the 'to' and 'cc' fields correct. If I get them perfect everything goes smoothly. Include too many people and nothing gets done. Don't include enough people and anything you do will be undone and you'll never hear the end of 'going around someone's authority'
>>712754159
I worked at a print shop. We got a huge contract to do all the printing for a coal power plant.
Jobs get sent in via FTP in zip files and a scanned PDF telling how many copies and sizes and distribution instructions. Like 1 group of plans in 3 sets 11x17, 1 set 18x24, 3 sets 24x36, and two groups of other sizes.
The guy who is supposed to print all the jobs takes all day to do it. Try and get our programmer to write a program to do it automatically.
>its not worth the time to develop a program for how little it can improve efficiency
>Write program on my own.
>guy takes a day off
>show owner the program
>click [GO]
>processing bars fly by
>450 print jobs pile up in printer queue
>bundle up jobs as they come out
>days print job is done in 90 minutes
>owner walks in and fires programmer
>given programming it job
>>712737922
>Gets fired and goes home with a blue eye
>blue eye
What happened to the other eye? Did it turn brown after you touched the nigger?
>>712752535
I can immediately tell what country you're from just from the fact that you automatically assumed that was the country we were talking about.
Fuck off amerifag
>>712754764
I lost my job in a similar fashion
>>712754477
>be me
>working on music
>someone wants to make a game
>they hear my music
>"OMG YOURE AWESOME! WILL YOU MAKE MUSIC IF I MAKE A GAME?"
>"Sure"
>Shows me game footage
>it's ok
>asks me when my music will be ready for the game
>asks him when he's paying me
>"Paying you? Why?"
>"do you think it's free?"
>"Why not?"
>"My time, my effort, my knowledge..."
People like them annoy the fuck out of me
>Be me
>working for my uncle
>cleaning his old shop rust/dust/grease everywhere even outside in the lot
>keeps getting broken into so fixing fences/doors/windows
>hauling scrap iron dumping it in truck for him to take it to recycling yada.. yada..
>get paid 500$ week
>only 16 at the time
>one day outside moving old 4 stroke engines and rims to be taken away
>mini-van pulls up
>basic midle aged cunt jumps
>"hay..hay sir.... HAY YOU"
>unplug from my soad playlist and look
>"what"
>"can you take these for me"
>"no"
>"what do you mean no"
>now noticing my voice
>"hay how old are you anyway"
>"16 why"
>I shrug, covered in dirt and grease sweating but pretty swol from the lifting I look older then I am
>she goes fucking balistic
>"OMG WHO WOULD EVER THINK TO USE THEIR CHILD AS CHEAP LABOR...... ABSOLUTLY DISQUSTING"
>As she is doing this gets a bunch of carboard and styrophoam from back amongst other trash.
>stop her from throwing it over fence
>"miss you cant......."
>[autistic screeching]
>goes into rant about how I'm so rude and violant and how she cant leave her trash here
>"I thought this was a dump and it is a dump what more can some trash harm you"
>"I'm trying to clean the place up we dont need other peoples trash here"
>uncle comes shambling outside from a nap hes old
>grunts out with heavy italian acient
>"Who in the fuck is making all that noise anon"
>sees lady with box of garbage in hand knows already the situation before she says anything
>"we dont want your shit this isn't a dump"
>She gets even angrier
>trys to shame uncle with me working out here at my age
>"HES TOO YOUNG FOR THIS OUT IN THIS WEATHER"
>"I told him he can leave whenever he wants he wanted to be here"
cont..?
>>712743319
fuck you. you're open until i'm ready to fucking leave you pleb
>>712751271
Where did I say I don't live comfortably you fucking moron?
What I said was having more income doesn't mean you have that much more money because the outflows rise with the income.
And there wasn't a complaint anywhere in my post.
Go be a nigger complaining about your life, while not doing anything about it, somewhere else.
Faggot.
>>712755064
Yes tell the ending of you story, why even ask?
>>712739898
Just for curiosity, have you or any of your co-workers taken drugs you have found?
>>712755054
look at this faggot
sits down and touches shit for awhile and makes sound come out
thinks he deserves money for it
newsflash pal it's not worth money unless you have to work for it, mental effort doesn't count for shit, the brain is a mass of fat not a muscle
you want money try actually doing something
>>712755409
This is why you will always be stuck doing manual labor.
Poorfag.
>>712755064
sure
>>712755337
>taking SHITTY drugs
Knowing what comes thru there prolly amplifies them if any of it is good and not
>>712755409
>making music isn't a means of living
OK why don't you go talk to John Williams who composed the OST of Star Wars.
Dumbass
>>712745260
It is though, you have fractions of cents on your bankaccount and some transactions use fractions of cents, you just cant view them
>>712753909
Kek. You smug mother fucker. Bet the gf wanted to fuck your brains out after that.
>>712740767
Same, I'm 27 now and work with people around my age and they find "your mom"jokes funny still, it's like some of these guys never grew up past the age of 11
>be me
>work as a programmer
>decide to move to another continent
>keep my job because it's nice to work from home
>coworkers are no longer even awake during my work hours
>call people when I need to talk to them
>no one ever calls me
>work in bed most of the time
>work whatever hours I want
>go to the gym in the mornings
>>712742927
Working in computer support is the worst. I did it for a month and couldn't handle that stupidity anymore
>>712743071
>>I just lost everything on my phone!
>>swipe to next homescreen
>>"oh"
I'm fucking crying right now
>Be me
>Go to school for computer science graduate with 4 year degree
>get good job at small company
>work with virtualization and replacing core infrastructure with upgraded equipment
>manager is great, pay is OK
>work there 4 years learning everything about IT
>have to work after hours and routinely 70+ hour weeks but hey I'm learning
>manager quits and I get promoted to director of IT
>same salary
>ask for raise, told because company is small they cant do better, even though i manage 5 people and run IT for 150mil/year company with no downtime
>start looking around at different jobs
>get offer from $majorcompanyhere$
> start working on critical team making 100k a year
>nobodyknowswhattheyaredoing.jpg
>smartest person on team by far, run loops around everyone.
> everyone looks to me for answers when shit breaks, some people went to PC Pro Schools and ITT Tech, have no idea how to do anything
>making 100k a year for a glorified helpdesk job. 1/3 of the responsibilities of my last job
>work 35 hour weeks, blend in and leave early 3:00 PM most days
>directors love me, on list of people to promote
>>712754837
>Assuming i was commenting on your circle jerk and not the fucking picture.
I hope you bleed out from every orifice of your body.
>Be me
>Housekeeper at a 5 star resort 11.25/hour not great but better then 10.45 okay hours. 30-35 a week
>Take out the trash in the rooms and put in the trash cans
>End of day sort out the trash and put bottles in crates, plastic/cardboard in bin and trash in the trash bin
>Advice the GM/Boss that we could save lots of time by using a 2 bin trash can (one part for bottles/trash/cardboard depends)
>Oh that'd cost to much...
>Buys new trashcans for 25 dollars each
>The trashcans that I wanted/advised are 30 dollars each...
>Waste 30 minutes sorting trash bins a day if not more. (normally sort out 3-4 bins a day)
>Thats my job, got more stories if you want them.
>waiting for the cock slapping mcdonalds story to be posted
>>712756199
any crazy stories about the guests? things you had to clean/find in rooms?
>>712755409
You dun cut yourself on that edge child.
>>712756199
more
>>712756333
nice trips
>>712746753
Fucking this
>>712754549
That is both sad and extremely true. I'm convinced that GS14s and above exist to purposefully slow down decision making and progress towards improving things.
>>712736751
>she has green hair like harley quinn
Stopped reading here.
>>712755237
>Outflow rise's.
Only if you're a nigger with no money management skills.
>>712755064
cont
>"Yeah but he doesn't know any better"
>"Mrs he ain't fucking stupid are you anon"
>he gestures at me
>mfw I don't know that to do
>"No.. I'm fine"
>"see hes fine"
>"WELL YOU AS.."
>"Mrs we ain't taken your shit so leave"
>"BUT WHY NOT ITS A DUMP..."
>he suddenly looks back at the shop and me
>"fine we'll take your shit"
>I laugh as I can see my uncle getting annoyed
>"Oh whats so funny, Anon go get a metal barrel and some gas"
>She and I both get suddenly get suspicious
>I go get the items with the biggest shit eating grin on my face knowing now what he meant
>"Okay lady throw your shit in the barrel"
>she does.. reluctantly
>he sets the thing ablaze lights a cigar
>"There ya happy"
>he leaves
>lady in a state of confusion and shock but pleased that her shit is gone
>"You can leave now your trash is gone if you want it back I can get the hose"
>"Will that's not very safe or what I wanted"
>I start going for the hose
>"NO it's fine thanks"
she just stares at me and the burning barrel while getting back into her van
this was the first of many times I had to get that barrel for other people like her leaving with the same stupid fucking look on their face
>>712754914
Then you are a lazy nig. Stop being a lazy nig.
>tfw work at cheetoh factory
>tfw guys 45+ think it's funny to piss and spit on the cheetohs right before they're packaged
>tfw we work midnights so nobody knows what actually goes on in there when the day shift management leaves
these old farts are sick they piss and spit and dump old gross liquid on the cheetohs all the time before they're covered in cheese and packaged
I'll never eat another cheetoh again
>>712754777
>The Joke
.
.
.
.
You.
>>712755556
Autism just hit a new level.
>work IT support for small local business
>spent most time in booking department, helping out 5 people that most likely couldn't tell a cpu from a block of ram
>manager tells me they have a lot of hardware in the basement, and she's pretty sure you could build one or two pc's with all the stuff
>basement is a huge mess, but sorting through it beats fixing the same problem for the same blond accounting girl for the N'nth time since I was hired
>after spending as much time there as possible for 3 days I've got the basement sorted (ey, I was alone in the basement, so no way I'm gonna put in a real effort)
>start looking at the actual hardware
>it's freaking ancient
>nothing later then 2006, some from the 1990's
>work out that that I could build 2 machines running win XP
>back to manager...
>manager is all smiles; "wow, 2 free pc's from old junk?"
>makes it clear that we are talking XP machines
>oh, but you can just install 8.1 on them, we have enough licenses
>use simple words to explain why either won't work, or would be a very bad idea
>manager still thinks 2 xp machines could be useful
>Imagine the horror blondie could make of xp, based on how much damage she's done to 8.1 and 10
>no, no no nonono, not dealing with that
>tell manager that XP is no longer being updated, and make up some junk about it being a huge security risk for the whole company if they went into use, and tell her about how slow xp is when she starts talking about using them for none-network stuff
>manager tries to make it sound like she understands and let's me take of early for all the hard work in the basement.
>decided to find another job...
>>712756829
please explain what's supposed to be funny about having one blue eye
>>712756762
i also had a lot more respect for my uncle old fart
>>712755409
sounds like you havent made any mental effort in your life kek
>>712755054
I get you, I'm a dev and asking for people to work free is stupid.
If I don't have cash then I offer pay on a percentage basis. Usually 15-25% for music because music can make or break a game.
>>712756333
Nice trips and I got loads
>>712756429
Gimme 2 minutes
>Roughly 3-4 months ago
>Go into VIP room (above average room for special guests, Celebs etc
>Start cleaning it nothing to badly used just some finger prints here and there dirt etc
>Go into the washroom to notice the horrors that I've just gotten myself into
>The toilet clogged and they filled it full of crap.
>Overflowed everywhere. I mean everywhere.
>Call my boss to come up and inspect it as thats out of my job
>Maintenance got called to unclog it and the deep clean team were tasked to clean the room.
>They found a bottle of random pills and some clothes.
>Go into room 420 (yes its actually a room)
>Normal stay over service (Change out towels, stock room, light clean, leave)
>Find a baggie of pot (at least a quarter pounder)
>Damn.
Got more if you want, lots of nasty finds if you want.
>Short story.
>Cleaning a room find a dildo, big ol' black thing like 12"
>Put it in a baggie and put it on the cart and start doing stay overs with a dildo on the cart standing up
>Guests faces were so goddamn funny.
>>712755967
Good job anon. Now use that extra downtime to invest in your own future business.
>>712757124
new thread
>>712755967
That's pretty fucking rad. I'm proud of you, anon.
>>712756772
Can't. Born that way
>>712753262
chinese buffet is lit
