So /b/, today my life ends. After years of abuse and misery, I'm putting it all to an end. I lost my job, my whole family has disowned me, and the one person I cared about left me today. I cannot do this anymore.
Trips decides how I do it. No, I will not be talked out of it.
>>712424805
eat too much cake
>>712424805
Question is, who or what do you hate most?
bleach no ballz
Smothered to death by himiwakos ever expanding breasts
Lay down in a bed of cacti rinse and repeat
Kill a few of them sinners first, then shoot yourself. Livestream it.
old age
Stabbed to death by an angry Kermit the frog cosplayer, you fuck
Real life frogger
Old age
>>712424805
Go to a mental therapist and ask him for a gun to kill yourself
>>712424805
Get a dead-end job,
become an alcoholic,
retain hope that the future will be bright.
tl;dr:
> become a slav
Hang yourself with barbed wire
Now listen here you fucking shit. I don't care if you wake up every morning in excruciating pain. I don't care if your wife left you for the man who castrated and raped you, before smearing your viscerated cock-paint over the curtains. You could have the shittiest life ever to have graced the million ring cunt circus that is the earth, but don't fucking jump in front of that train. Why? You might think I'm gonna say that life is worth living, or that now you're ready to die, you're ready to start living, right? Wrong. You're the human equivalent of a dry handjob, you start out with low expectations and yet you still continue to lower them further - why would you ever think of jumping in front of a fucking train? Shoot yourself in the head. Drown yourself. Wear a fucking sandwich board made of bacon that says "I hate Muslims" in Birmingham, I don't give a shit. Just so long as you don't an hero by train.
Why? Because if you slop your pube soup of a body on those train tracks and ruin that marvel of soul-crushing commute technology, there's a chance I'll be inside, stuffed in between more gaping cunts than a second hand rubber fist. And I'll be fucking late for work. Again.
And some poor cuck from Brighton is gonna have to clean up man jam off the tracks. Again.
And then my boss is going to bust my balls like he works for fucking Queensnake.com, and he'll have every right to, because I was fucking late, because some cock juggling human prolapse thought it would be a great idea to try and french a train track.
Kill yourself, faggot. Just not on a fucking train.
>>712424805
Cyanide poisoning from Apple seeds
Old age
Water board yourself with bleach
Slit your wrists on a livestream
Heart attack
Dont
OD on marijuana
>>712424805
Hang yourself OP. Godspeed.
Swallow a lit m80
>>712424805
the fuk are u talkin about
its only until we've lost everything are we free to do anything
>>712424805
Join ISIS
Die like a man!
hold your breath until you die faggot.
Eating a bunch of metal shavings and then get a cat scan
>>712424805
Take acid on the roof of a building, but, if you don't die you have to give life a second chance
>>712426049
Roll
By not doing it
Paint your face black and walk down the street with a gun
>>712426028
this. rolling
>>712426078
this. Rolling.
Drink 1.5 gallons of Bacardi 151 and piss on a bonfire
Bury yourself next to a fire ant hill. First provoke the fire ants so they will attack you.
Come to my dungeon
yell "for allah" and blow yourself up or do a shooting in a crowd of people. you have to make it look legit. make it look like you're unironically a part of isis.
>>712426560
Roll
Run in the streets naked while cutting your wrists
publicy support trump
cut up your tighs in a hot tub
Cut your dick off
>>712425700
GODDAMMIT! I was but a single digit away from getting trips:
why have you forsaken me, oh chaotic Kek?
>>712427050
Masturbate with razor blades
Noose livestream
join marines!
Go into a mosque and blow yourself up
Seppuku on livestream.
>>712427087
Reroll for this + live stream
>>712426049
Roll
>>712424805
>"No, I will not be talked out of it."
>implying any of us want to talk anyone out of suicide
We want you to stream it, faggot.
>>712427127
Rolling for this
>>712427127
Rolllll
Hemorrhagy from knife up pooper
>>712427127
rolling for this
>>712426049
Rolling for this but yell us where you live so we can check the news to see if OP delivered
get several gallons of gasoline, go to a church, douse yourself in gasoline and then when you walk through the doors, start screaming "HEIL SATAN" and then spark a lighter you had stashed in your pocket
overdose on pasta
Hang yourself on livestream
>>712427363
Roll
Modify a treadmill. If you're too pussy to do that. Then post a vid of you chugging bleach
Die of old age somewhere in your 80s or maybe 90s.
>>712427127
Rollin for it
Live stream bleach chug
>>712427400
Rawl
>>712424805
Just use a knife fag
Make a video saying ''I have information that will lead to Hillary Clinton's arrest''
>>712427127
THIS
>>712427448
Roll
>>712424805
Use a knife
>>712424805
Just kill yourself
>>712427127
Roll for this
>>712427127
might as well roll for the lulz
>>712427126
rolllllll
>>712427127
THIS pls
>watch porn
>Start jacking off
>Get boner
>Cut it off
>Bleed out
>Livestream
>???
>Profit+legendary status
>>712427127
Rolli popi
>>712427127
roll
>>712424805
USE A KNIFE TARD
Drink a lot of water
>>712427753
Rollllll
Keep jerkin off till you die.
get electrocuted
>>712427127
ROLL
Get shot by cops
>get gun
>call 911 saying ur gonna shoot up a school
>go to said school
>get gun out
>shoot in the air
>get shot
OR
Russian Roulette Livestream
Love someone
Take a fire poker up the shitter
>>712427753
this do it
>>712427753
Rolling for this
>>712427570
found the trump cuck
>>712424805
old age.
>>712425759
Holy kek underrated post
Fuck faggots pissing about w/ public transport
>>712427753
re roll
>>712427127
Roll ll
Putting a bag over your head on your 80th birthday
>>712427127
rolling
RE: Take fire poker up the shitter
>>712427809
Roll
>>712427861
Roll for Russian roulette livestream
>>712424805
Use a sword
>>712427127
Roll
>>712427970
Roööll
>>712427127
roll numba two
Russian roulette livestream
>>712427753
Rawl
>>712424805
Perhaps a way in where it won't damage your organs right after calling 911, that way you'd be helping someone if you're an organ donor. I wish you wouldn't resort to suicide, but I can't blame you in wanting to escape the pain. There's a certain sanity to it, but I hope you seek help instead.
Die from driving car into police station full speed
>>712427127
Roöollo
>>712427753
re rawl
>>712427753
This.
live stream hang yourself faggit
>get hooker
>get AIDS
Go into your closest fast food restaurant and start drinking the deep fry oil
>>712428112
OFF BY ONE
>>712427167
reroll for masturbate with razor blades + livestream
>>712428112
OFF BY ONE
REROLL
>>712427753
This one plz
Start swallowing kitchen utensils
>>712427753
Kek
Livestream hanging
Call your family and tell them how you feel
Die from being anally fucked too hard
Paint yourself in blackface then walk into an American police station with a BB gun
>>712427127
Rollerono
Kys
Stab yourself in the stomach with a knife.
>>712427127
this remember to cut horizontally. seppuku isn't stabbing yourself
>>712427874
Roll
>>712424805
You're going to let your family win?
>>712428333
TRIPS!!!!
Choke on a dick
>>712428333
DAMN. WINRAR
>>712428333
WINRAR
>>712428333
C^:
Jump from high building in NYC
>>712428333
WINRAR
>>712428333
Ding ding ding
Rip seppuku
Run into the middle of the road
you're not gonna kill urself anyway attention whore nigger
Go out in a blaze of glory by ice skating while on fire or if you don't have ice where you are go roller skating In a really public place
op better not be faggot
>>712428333
>>712428333
WINRAR DO IT LIVESTREAM IT TOO
ALSO GIVE US LOCATION
>>712428333
I GOT THOSE TRIPS.
OP DELIVER
Suicide is for faggots, die in your 90s and have a long happy life
>>712428333
gg '
:^)
>>712428333
we have a winner
what is best livestream?
>>712428309
just take a horse like mr hands
>>712428333
winrar
OP will not delivar
GIVE DELIVAREEEEEEEEEEE
don't be such a cuck , take revenge on ur family for treating u like that. kill one of them so the others will have really bad feels the rest of their lives . finally kill yourself quickly , preferably a pistol to the tempel of ur head. pretty much painless
>>712428333
got it
>>712427127
roll
Seppuku it is
Friend, there is always a tomorrow. If you are to still go through, atleast die with honour.
To kill yourself is the greatest sin against man as there is always one.
>>712428543
twitch should work
>>712428677
all i need is a sword. any suggestions where to buy one?
>>712427753
THESE QUADS SHALL CANCEL OUT THE TRIPS
FOR FUCKS SAKE DON'T DO IT OP
>>712424805
Op please.. i know it hurts but its life. you need to get yourself back up.. death doesn't solve anything you'll shut off like a computer you will cease to exsist.. everyones life has a impact on the world and yours does aswell.. please OP ending your life will not fix this
>>712428754
just use a knife
Local Home Depot should work
>>712428754
you don't need a sword for seppuku use a kitchen knife
>>712428754
Get a butcher knife at walmart. Youre not a shogun fucker.
>>712428858
after the 20 years of abuse, i can't. no one cares anymore.
>>712428858
Shut the fuck up weak fag let OP make his own choices
>>712426560
YES
If op will do It he'll be a fucking pussy, take life like a man, join the army if you want to die or something
>>712428895
>>712428861
You cannot commit seppuku without a sword
>>712428912
Eh, I guess. Closest walmart is a few hours away, so happening thread will be posted later.
>>712428754
here's an example
you don't need a fagot to cut your head off. that's for pussies
>>712424805
Cut your veins OP, provide pics
Get a knife and try to behead yourself like in the ISIS videos. Keep cutting until you pass out
>>712428962
>anymore
I care, just fucking don't
>>712428350
neckbeard instructing people on the 'correct' way to commit seppuku detected
dont do it OP. It will get better
Do a flip
>>712426049
>>712428333
Do it faggot
>>712425110
is this real
OP here. I've decided to jump off/in front of something cause seppuku is going to fucking hurt.
Hopefully I make the news. Tune into KHOU 11 if you can later tonight.
>>712429240
stabbing yourself is less painful, and you don't see the organs.
Go to public park and start chugging bleach
>>712424805
Exit bag
>>712424805
Do a double backflip of a building and stream it
>>712429383
https://encyclopediadramatica.se/Suicide#The_Awesome
do the awesome
I really hope you won't do it, OP. Every shitty phase transitions into a better one!
>>712429082
seppuku can be performed with a longsword, short sword, or knife. Find another excuse shitdog.
>>712424805
watch this please and tell me how you feels afterwards
>>712429383
>"Trips decide how I do it"
>Expects trips to chose something easy
>"Nah fuck trips I will do it this way instead"
shove a brush up ur ass hole jerk off to child porn while u hang ur self first write a note telling ur parents how this is there fault and they could have stoped this from happening live stream this
>>712429482
pro tip
CTRL + f "winrar"
>>712429383
Who cares if it hurts. You started this thread, now you have to deliver
>>712429383
don't fucking do it
>>712429532
life transitions to death
suicide is skipping to the best phase
>>712429383
Faggot, no one is gonna remember you if you just jump out from a building or something. Make your suicide memorable. Make sure that your death wasn't as pathetic as the rest of your life was.
>>712429383
faggot
it doesnt matter if it hurts, youll bleed out soon. at least die an honorable death
>>712429784
so death by cop? mass shooting?
>>712429848
this
>>712424805
Don't care about other people so much. There's billions of species of life on the planet. They all get along and love one another. Humans have isolated themselves and only fun joy in human interaction. Get out there and do something challenging and have fun.
Family sucks. Jobs suck. Friends suck. Everyone sucks. You suck too. Sometimes the pathway to victory involves taking cross roads that seem sketchy and u related but actually open up doors needed to achieve your dreams.
Don't have any dreams? Yeah you do. Think about it.
>>712429383
SEPPUKU. ON LIVE STREAM. NOW.
>>712424805
If I was in your predicament I would probably take my family with me or an ex.
>>712429383
give out your name so we can prove it was you who made the news
>>712429383
Seppuku and become an internet legend.
Jump off a bridge and nobody gives a fuck about your loser ass.
>like this cheesedick is going do either
>>712429879
Death by cop is even more pathetic and mass shootings are becoming to common. Try to do something different. Shoot up a kindergarten or a center for refugees
>>712430116
The face will give it away, I look like a fucking loser anyways
dedicate your life to becoming hottest shemale ever and sucking off all 4chan friends nonstop
>>712430217
fucking do the live stream seppuku you faggot
at least die an honorable death. who cares if it hurts? you'll bleed to death soon after, anyway
dont pussy out
>>712430255
roll
>>712430043
>There's billions of species of life on the planet. They all get along and love one another.
this is the stupidest shit I've seen all day. seriously, kys.
>>712430043
most other species hate each other.
cats kill things for fun and dolphins torture smaller creatures for their enjoyment
Find the highest building you can, buy a gopro and film as you jump off. Or take an Lsd thumbprint
>>712424805
30 sharpies in pooper
>>712427127
Rolling
>>712424805
Death by tomato soup
>>712424805
Two shotguns in the head.
>>712427127
Re roll
>>712430477
rolling for 31 sharpies instead
>>712424805
Go out and start shooting ppl
He can't do seppuku without a kaishakunin you crazy bastards
>>712426028
I tried this my lung collapsed
>>712430444
ooh i got tripes
>>712424805
Old age
Death by shootout
>>712430217
Tie as many ropes as you have together, make a really long noose and jump of the tallest building near you with it round your neck.
>>712430709
Rolling for this
>>712430692
waste of a good roll.
IF THIS GETS TRIPS, AM ROLLING FOR LIVESTREAM OF NOOSE ATTACHED TO CEILING FAN WHILE PLAYING "YOU SPIN ME ROUND"
shit is heating up boizzz
OP again. I've set my mind on seppuku. I'll be getting the knife and will post the happening thread in 4 hours. Until then, Adios
>>712430787
Will probably rip his head off ROLLING
>>712430845
do it now, faggot
i might not be here in 4 hours
>>712430835
someone already won he's not doing anything else
>>712424805
Dont do it, ill kill myself insted, ok?
>>712430900
Well I fought since he was worrying about pain that the instant neck breaking would appeal to him.
>>712430938
I need a knife you cunt
>>712430984
yeah but he denied it earlier. then he decided after i posted that to do it again
>>712427429
Roll this is amazing
>>712430787
roll
>>712431048
should already have a knife
and it shouldnt take 4 hours to get a knife
>>712431048
Use a fucking kitchen knife and bleed out
>>712431184
At least do it in front of your parents/children or ex
>>712431023
do it pussy
Holy shit, this is the first time I browse 4chan and see this shit
Is this perfect timing or what?
>>712431441
Newfag
>>712431441
Usual
>>712424805
listen now faggot, and do listen carefully
if you consider that your life lacks ny meaning anymore (wrong, but i don't care), kill yourself
but take this short philosophical trip with me, and consider the following method:
there are two ends to your life, or rather two stages of dying. first you forfeit your life, your person, your future. then you physically end yourself, get rid of your body and whatever happens to your spirit who knows.
what I want you to do, unless you are a selfish bastard, and I know very well you are, like most fucking europeans and americans today, is to complete the first stage right away, and delay the second one.
why? well, since you will be, in an abstract but definitive way dead in a couple of hours, your mind and body can be put to some good use. what's the difference if you technically stay alive for another several decades. you have no future, no person, nothing. you, that is this person that you used to be, is dead just as dead as if you really did shoot your brains off.
you're merely using your mind to control and sustain your body until it decays and withers away in the end. you will get any job and sustain yourself, and the rest of the time you have you will devote to other people. nothing ambitious because a piece of shit like you has to start with the basics, and perhaps stick to the basics for the rest of physical existence. just go to any charity and volunteer to do any menial job, physical tasks, etc.
>>712431441
Every day shit
>>712429383
You're a fucking pussy dude. You only die once, make it memorable you jizzstain
>>712431441
newfag
make your own suicide thread
also shit timing, op will pussy out
>>712431441
Fucking newfag
>>712431441
it only actually happens maybe once or twice every couple years so don't get your hopes up
>>712431441
happens about twice a day.
op is usually a faggot and doesn't deliver
Once we're done with OP this should become a creative suicide ideas thread
>>712431672
i agree
that or a spiderman thread
>>712430444
Ok, 3/1,000,000,000 species kill for fun. My point is they live in harmony. We don't. It's our fault. Be more like a bunny rabbit and fucking move on.
Smoke da weed op n chill
>>712431771
Spiderman thread
>>712431921
>>712431921
SPOODERMAN
>>712431544
Or is it that time makes a whole world of difference, OP?
Cause you just can't handle the sadness?
That's it - this is where living a life centered around your own self has led you. A very sad place indeed.
But you will be technically, as far as I'm concerned, dead.
Leftover emotions will linger for a while, but if you really kill your old self inside, they'll be gone after a while.
Of course if you were man enough, and you're not, I would advise to stay alive and handle your feelings like a man, and then make some changes to your life, try something new etc. But you, no, you should just die. It's just that putting a perfectly fine mind and body to waste is practically a crime. That's why, if you selfishly decide to die not only on the inside but completely, it'll just prove you're a typical selfish pussy.
>>712424805
I feel like OP will kill himself not because other bad life experiences but because everyone calling him a faggot.
>>712431776
some species profited from people. rats, dogs, pigeons , cats , any fucking god damn bug on the face of this planet.
Don't be a faggot and jump in front of a train/truck/car or off a building potentially ruining someone else's life.
Be a man and do cocaine until your heart explodes.
Or feed yourself to bears. Or go legs first into a wood chipper and be turned into fertilizer.
>>712431921
This is now a Spiderman thread.
Blow your fucking head of with a shotgun
>>712432225
no lolis killed you
bad spoder
what the hell is a happening thread, where should i go to witness this? (im kind of a new fag)
>>712432400
he's going to make a thread later
a happening is when something awesome happens.
so you basically just need to wait for op to make a thread in 4 hours or so.
again though op probably will bail.
I might be a bit late but you could try to swallow a acoustic guitar.
How about you just say Fuck it and leave forever? Just leave Town and go somewhere to do fuck knows what. Lots of people might be jeaulous of you because you don't really have to leave anything behind, no you can escape.
>>712424805
kill yourself from old age
>>712424805
buy a tent, food and a ticket to Russia. Go to Chernobyl. Camp there until you get cancer. go home and wait for all of this to blow over.
>>712433158
Dis
old age
>>712432651
so i can just keep this page open in another tab and check it in 4 hours?
Blood-loss. Cut three of your limbs. Decide you which ones. Post proof
>>712433646
Reroll
>>712433530
no. this thread will 404 by then
there will be another thread. expect it to be popular.
>>712433530
That is what i'm doing
>>712433751
ok thank you anon
old age
>>712433807
I'm keeping up this thread and on rekt threads on a different tab,
>>712433530
no go to the catalog in a few hours and use CTRL + f or the search bar to find it
>>712434258
Well while we wait lets think up some creative suicides
>>712434409
ok go up to space and jump into the sun
Death or Help
Tomorrow I will kill myself if there is no advice for this. (TLDR)
So this have been driving me crazy. I am feeling so fucking depressed and shit is going too far with my life. I have no friends, no gf or any job to get some income for my studies. It is last year of college and my only dream so far is to make it to MIT. I've always wanted a gf but I have never really got the time to balance my love and my studies. My grades are pretty good but I can not balance my studies and all that shit with hanging out with friends.
The thing is if I choose to start hang out instead I'll probably end up working in a local store or some shit. But if I continue all these studies and shit I can make it to a new life. But the last 4 years I've never been able to spend some time with enjoyment. I REALLY NEED TO GET SOME INCOME.
So should I work in a shitty store or fast food restaurant to get paid some bucks every hour? If so I'm afraid I might not get my academic goal up (no MIT).
Kill me give me a fucking tying to just cut off my throat please.
Sharpie up the pooper
>>712434858
do it
>>712429602
for a moment i thought he was gonna throw the cop off instead
>>712434921
read it baggot
Go deep diving using a AIR tank. That should kill you
>>712435131
Is there any drug that can kill me so I dont feel any pain but instead just die in sleep or while passed out
>>712434858
>learn more
>Get a good job
>be rich and richer
>become the USA president elect
Make anon great again
please dont do it Anon I just had a friend suicide and i feel awful. you dont want people to feel this way. just find something new and meaningful to do with life.
>>712435260
Well i'm sure the intoxicated nitrogen and the lack of oxygen will make you unconscious before you die
>>712435374
I was thinking more like pills and shit
Tie twenty Tesco plastic bags round your face and time how long it takes to suffocate
>>712424805
GET THE FUCK OFF 4CHAN AND GET HELP
see a therapist, call a suicide hotline ANYTHING
the pain you're feeling right now is TEMPORARY
suicide is PERMANENT
>>712424805
Death by Hot Pockets
>>712435572
I'm not a expert with pills but too much of anything is harmful so how about you chug ten bottles of cal-pol.
