>Walk into your bedroom >You find Chloe Moretz on your
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
>Walk into your bedroom
>You find Chloe Moretz on your bed
Wat do???
run for my life
>>710774632
Assume this is not my room I entered or that I'm likely high as fuck.
>>710774632
Quietly exclaim "what the fuck" and ask her what she's doing here. Then worry about my room being messy and get embarrassed.
call to the animal patrol
WHY
ARE YOU WEARING SHOES
ON THE GODDAMNED BED
YOU IDIOT
Ask her to open some Jars i have
>>710774632
"Why the fuck are you in my room, and what kind of blanket is that? It looks soft as fuck."
>>710774632
Just straight up anal rape her.
>>710774632
Pic related
hello police?
>>710774632
cook her eggs
>>710774632
Ask if I can give her the "ol' lickaroo"
>>710774632
Thank god first of all.
Secondly I probably stutter and ask with no small amount of shock and excitement "why-why are you here?!"
Tears welling in my eyes already.
I assume just like in my dreams I just ravage her, against her will or not.
Eventually she always succumbs to her fleshs desires and we end up the happiest couple on earth.
I'll have a hard time leaving my wife, who has been so good to me.
But I'll use some of Chloe's money to set her up well once I leave for Hollywood with my a-list cum dump queen.
>>710774632
open her and search for a cold beer
>>710775246
Specifically her eggs?
Or you're going the cook her some eggs.
>>710774632
I would kindly ask her to leave.
GAYFISH
>>710775349
lmao
>>710774632
>You're rich, right?
>Can I have about $100,000? We can do anything you want if I can.
>We can even do butt-stuff.
make her dress up as hit girl and then wed play pretend karate masters and eat teddy grams
>>710775246
Will she absolutely HAVE to eat the eggs?
Offer her a cup of tea
>>710774632
Enlighten her about how corrupt Hillary Clinton is. Like most celebrities, she probably won't listen because she's so detached from the real world and is a puppet to her manager and the media. At least I tried.
>>710774632
Hi, you'r home early today, that's nice. Is dinner ready?
Elh
>>710775207
Hi how can I help you?
Shoot her and call the cops, as she is on my property and obvious is trespassing.
>>710775496
Are you referring to that video about consent where they use tea as a euphemism for sex?
>>710774632
Ask her if she wants a cup of coffee maybe...
Looks like somebody's about to get BLACKED. Maybe offer her an orange afterwards.
>pic related
>I have this body-type
>>710774632
i know people like to hate on her now but in all honesty if she was offering I would smash that pussy and hope she falls in love with me so she can be my sugar momma
>>710774632
GRAB A SNACK
>>710775530
would rather have avril in my bedroom tbh fam
>>710774632
scream how the fuck did you get in my house
>>710774632
I tell her to get the fuck out, bcs my GF is way hotter than Chloe
>>710775811
Bruh, she set the standard for girls 14 years ago for me. I remember being in second grade when her first album dropped. I'm 21 now and still haven't found my 11/10 qt3.14 avril.
>>710775559
A blonde sexy girl has broken into my house send help
>>710775432
would be neat to play that guy on fallout 4. can anyone make that character?
>>710775859
kek
>>710775246
>>710774632
I suppose I'd take out my 9mm and point it at her head, and then summon the police, as I would do with any intruder.
>>710775988
i feel you m8
>>710774632
I will make that face
>>710774632
I would offer her a donut.
>>710775988
>I remember being in second grade when her first album dropped
my boy, you're not a man yet, live your life and quit trying to play adult because you were raised by mtv
>>710775246
I see what u did there
>>710774632
Ask "her" to leave.
>>710776289
>>710775530
>>710775047
>>710774949
>>710774793
wtf? I thought school started already why is still so summer in here.
>>710776612
>>710776696
Wrong person, fucking moron
>>710774632
Call cops, sue her for all her money.
>>710776270
>>710774632
fuck the shit outta her, i dont care if she looks like a fuckin refrigerator
>>710775744
Nigga youre the one who gets blacked. Fucking twink
>>710774632
sex would occur on some level
>>710777149
is this now an avril thread?
>>710777319
I'm not a twiiiiiink. I really enjoy being thin.
>>710777419
yes
Tie her up, put her in a collar, throat fuck her. Take pictures and videos of her naked and getting fucked and post them to /b/, write lewd stuff on her body, turn her into a mewling degenerate cum slut
>>710777495
good
I'd do a lot of things... but I'd probably move into a different room, just in case there were cameras installed in my absence.
>>710777394
man she really looks liek shit now
>>710777695
Very good <3
>>710777482
And it's fine to enjoy being thin, it's just that looking like that makes you a twink
>>710777695
cant believe she married nickelback
>>710777587
Time is friend to no woman, anon.
>>710777966
She left him for me
>>710777793
indeed
>>710778009
Except Kate beckensale and Elizabeth Hurley. They both looked weird when they were young.
>>710775403
Is this shooped?
>>710775859
kek
>>710778120
<3
Glad to see a like minded /b/rother
>>710774632
Call the police. There's a fat and ugly intruder in my house.
>>710777751
World class dsl still
Ask how a whale survived out of water
>>710774632
Ask her politely to leave so I can invite an attractive girl to my bed
>>710778340
>>710778326
Don't lie. Your spegetti would be all over the floor
>>710778392
good one toddler
>>710778392
Just go ask your mom
Think to myself "why the hell is there a fridge on my bed?"
>>710778299
yup
>>710778698
>>710775946
I doubt that, anon.
>>710778523
maybe the spaghetti from last night's dinner
>>710778523
>Never talked to girls. Never fucked a celeb. Lives with your mother.
Don't assume everyone is like fat and ugly losers like you.
Shoot her dumb ass for trespassing.
>>710778722
It's so cute how she used to bra stuff.
See this picture from 2002
>>710778865
>Don't assume everyone is like fat and ugly losers like you.
What
>>710774987
Underrated post
>>710778980
Now look at this one
Same year.
>>710778722
I am a firm believer that anything more than a handful is a waste.
>>710778849
I like her tiny hiney
>>710774632
Would tip my Fedora and enlighten her
>>710774632
give her a bucket and a mop and put her to work cleaning my place
>>710776612
>>710776696
>>710774632
Ask her to clean her vage
>>710777319
kek
>>710779171
Trailer park boys is overrated Canadian diarrhea
>>710779041
I'm a firm believer that you're a faggot.
Help myself to some Moretz pussy.
>>710778523
>>710779207
>chloefag damage controlling his beloved fridge
this is hilarious
>>710774632
leave that horrendous plank on the side, and masterbait to Ivanka Trump.
>>710778232
noope
Ask her will would she be laying in those sperm and sweat-soaked stains
>>710779041
>>710779238
kek
>>710779440
>>710779238
You seem mad
>>710779382
>that fucking filename
>>710779267
Y-you too
>>710779382
How about you sucking my dick slut tonight
>>710779898
Ask what a fridge is doing on my bed.
>>710780494
>>710780550
honestly saw this coming
always thought she looked like a piglet
>>710780734
Quiet, you fat bitch head.
>>710780550
Yeah, sorry-- best fake I could find.
Ask how the fuck she even got in the house without anyone noticing her. Also point out the obvious lack of wounds consistent with a medium sized dog doing what she was trained to do.
>>710779898
>>710780981
>>710774632
immediately call the Barhein Sheik and ask for a a million dollars for her
>>710774632
Call her parents and ask for the ransom again.
>>710781128
>>710781409
>>710774632
Show off my new AR-15.
>>710781864
What type of receiver did you get?
Ask her to fuck off, its time to play pokemon on 3ds
>>710781953
BRB, gonna check.
Just got the cheapest one they had, figured I could mod it later.
>>710781971
She'd play with you though, anon.
>>710782102
Dpms?
>>710776865
>newfag detected
>>710782154
Correctomundo
>>710782154
>dpms
>>710782348
Pretty good for the price, I've been saving up for a colt
>>710782127
I have a thing for vinyl pants
and video games
and clawie
>>710782492
Yeah, just within my price range of $650.
>>710782788
Keep it well oiled and they are excellent investments
>>710776612
Take a picture and upload to 4chan
>>710782941
I just bought it yesterday and I already love it.
I've used an SKS, Mosin Nagant, and some .22 rifle (I was a kid when I first used, so I don't what it was). Out of all of those it's been the easiest to use; I learned how it all worked in less than half an hour.
>>710779507
>>710774632
Kill it with fire
>>710774632
>Wat do???
Ask, "who the fuck are you?"
>>710774632
ask her if she have the phonenumbers of stew and Delevingne
>>710783264
I have a Yugoslav sks as well. Only $200, and milled instead of stamped metal.
>>710784125
>Delevingne
Stupid dyke
>>710774632
anally rape her with no lube and tell her to stop being a feminist cunt.
>>710783486
I'm boxy you see
>>710784356
>>710784258
(well yoiu know .... i'm johna hill internally)
>>710784586
>johna
You can't even spell your name
>>710786472
>>710778888
Quads of truth
Chloe is hideous
>>710774632
Count to 100
Shit in pants
Do jumping jacks
>>710775807
what does the un-photoshopped version of this even look like?
>>710786823
Is it hard to type with your dads dick lodged in your mouth?
>>710774632
Probably have a heartattack. If not, i would get pissed, because she didn't come some years earlier. Back when i was 13 and i had the biggest celeb-crush on her
>>710775579
Castle doctrine doesn't apply to young, white, blonde haired, blue eyed actresses.
>>710775946
>Makes outlandish claim
>Doesn't provide proof
Timestamped pics or she doesn't exist.
>>710774632
call pizza hut
>>710779207
>Being so harshly sexually abused by an authority figure at an early age as to form such a blatantly wrong opinion like this
You should seek professional help to work through your problems.
>>710787174
what's a dads dick? Some brand or type of toy? Some weird British name for a food?
>>710774632
Id lock her in the room so she cant vote for Hillary.
>>710788364
>>710787698
Because he's a liar and a thief
>>710774632
Suck her cock?
>>710788364
>>710774632
Wonder why one of the maintenance staff is on my bed.
http://www.strawpoll.me/11588141
I would turn 360° and walk away
>>710774632
Call the cops.
Oh boy I'm gonna need to buy another storage container.
>>710774632
ask her if the fire has risen
>>710774632
bathe in her blonde hair
>>710774632
ask her where those sheets came from
>>710774632
I'd ask her if she knew what to do with those tossed salads and scrambled eggs.
>>710774632
BAM!
Falcon punch her for shilling for Hillary
>>710774632
Ask her if she would die if I take her mask off
ask for money
>>710774632
Lock her in the closet for 3 days then beat her bloody. Rinse, repeat.
>>710791803
Best answer in the whole thread.
>>710774632
Arm-wrestle
Change the basement door's lock.
bump
>>710792795
SDOMSDOMSDOMSDOMSDOMSDOMSDOMSDOMSDOMSDOMSDOMSDOMSDOMSDOMSDOMSDOMSDOMSDOMSDOMSDOMSDOMSDOM
grab her hand and immediately use it to wack it in place of my own
>>710788077
weak damage control
Are you 13 or something?
>>710775349
HAHAHA
Rape.
>>710774632
>What do???
Why of course, my best Bill Cosby impression.
More montage of her please !
>>710796088
>>710778009
Giant fucking feet
>>710774632
take the delorean and back to the present
>>710778168
Susan surandon
>>710774632
Fuck her in all her holes.
>>710774632
have a political discussion with her about feminism and stuff while giving her a loving foot massage
>>710791803
That was a quality sitcom.
>>710796677
Yeah her as well
>>710774632
Killary Cliton, that happened
>excuse me strangely shaped girl
>please get off my bed
she's a granny now, I'd ask her if she has any younger sisters then politely ask her to leave.
>360 and walk away
>>710774632
Ask if she likes anime
This chick looks like she could be Chloe's sister:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rkTieqWS8RA
>>710774632
Do the fuck
To hell with you guys, I'm not picky
Scream like a little girl and jump out the window.
>>710774632
good girl
>>710798014
That's a very creative webm.
>>710774632
>Wat do???
Everything.
Play patty cake
>>710774632
Challenge her to a game of rocket league.
>>710774632
>>710776865
Fuck up you condescending cunt, no one gives a fuck if you've been wading through the degeneracy that is 4chan for 30 years, it just means you're a certified sperglord
>>710799077
does she really play RL
>>710777587
My dude
>>710774632
immediately tongue fuck her asshole
>>710787174
mmmm
>>710774632
I'd kick her in the teeth u till she release my dog. Then me and my dog would hump her legs
>>710800050
Legacy clawie is best clawie. Atleast until she gets her shit together.
>>710774632
>Kill bat man
>>710799824
she said on twitter she does, I'm sure console though
>>710800477
lost so much cum to bmh2
>>710774632
ask her where'd the cheese go
>>710779186
Wtf
>I want to die now
>>710774632
>lock the door
>tell her it will only hurt a little bit
You know you like it
>>710801090
those sweet little armpits
>>710774632
If it was before she got fat I'd be excited, but I would still jiggle those fat thighs
>>710801090
She aged poorly, agreed
>>710774632
>tip fedora
>turn 360° and walk away
>>710801164
This is just for you anon...
>>710800637
Isn't rocket league cross-platform?
>>710801436
mm that young sweet salty body, so hot
>>710774632
>>710801623
i wanna tongue her nose out for her
>>710790581
>>710797389
>>710790581
That's a full circle. You would end up facing her again.
>>710802000
mmmm
>>710801706
hah I remember you. how you been
>>710774632
Fuck the ever loving shit out of her, stretching and filling both holes and her mouth.
Then I'd go downstairs and scold my dog for being a complacent asshole and allowing random people to breach my fenceline.
Then I'd grab 2 beers, open one to drink and shove the other icy bottle of Chloe's traumatized snooch.
Then idk, watch some tv or something...
>>710802117
>kek
good. i still have that fetish it seems lol
>>710802148
>scold my dog
But he did good by letting Chloe into your house for you to ravage. I would reward this dog.
>>710802610
Yeah we get it, did this meme finally get to r/4chan I take it?
>>710775246
>you dont have to tell me what happened
>but you have to eat these
>>710802872
qt patootie
>>710774632
kill her, she's an ugly whore
>>710802872
She's staring at cock
>>710794698
Tell me, dear sir: are you a faggot?
>>710803137
she's adorable you are a jealous hooker
>>710803578
she knew she had the power over the casting directors already. look at that face at the end, she knows they want it
Always wanted to tongue fuck her asshole
>>710803754
A smile that could warm the coldest heart>>710803578
>>710804385
mmm that warm smile and lips
>>710774632
360 degrees and walk straight out a window
>>710801444
I think so?
>>710804105
>>710804105
Don't be coy anon, what are you trying to say?
>>710804783
>right here
>>710804838
That I always would have let her shit in my mouth
>>710804105
Chloës asshole is beautiful, she said she routinely bleached it.
>>710805247
Probably still smooth like it always has been.
>>710805369
we can only imagine
>>710786703
wtf is this from?
>>710805495
Probably got tongue fucked long ago
>>710775246
I know that meme yo
>>710805525
https://youtu.be/CXOEixzkuVw
those pigtails tho. hnngggg
Fuck her right in the pussy
>>710805716
By Brooklyn Beckham
>>710804783
>>710806638
oh way before that
>>710805972
I chuckled. Thank you, sir
>>710774632
Wake up and masturbate
>>710774632
Wonder how a fridge got through my bedroom door.
>>710806802
she speaks fluent Korean
>>710806655
She let her brother do her makeup as a joke, if you don't know the context.
im gonna cum
>>710801798
hello newfriend
>>710774632
Toss that coal burning skank out the fucking window.
>>710808348
>walked next to chance the rapper
>coal burner
If that's burning coal, I'm a total mudshark.
>>710774632
With high fucking heels on my fucking bed I would throw her out of the bed and make her clean the fucking blanket
>>710807210
Just shows how ugly she actually is more.
>>710774632
Stab her over 50 times in the chest, then cut out her vagina so i can put it on a necklace
>skull fuck her like a nig nog later
