Good evening Anonymous! Is anything troubling you? Maybe I can help.
>Come in for advice, fortune-telling, and friendly conversation.
>GETs (dubs, trips, etc.) can receive a tarot reading from me. Ask a question or leave it general, or anywhere in between.
>GETs can be donated to others, but you have to be specific about who gets it.
>Leave a name (nickname, real name, made up name) and you'll receive a fortune cookie even if you don't GET.
>Patience and love! These take time, so hang around after you GET and remind me if it seems like I missed you. Remember that you have to actually ask for a reading to get one. I'm not scanning the thread for dubs!
>Leave internet/avatar drama at the gate, please.
Happy Friday!
>>710551574
Is it just us this time?
>>710551696
Maybe that's okay~
>>710551732
Yeah, now we can do something super secretive and nobody else will know!
>>710551696
>>710551732
Not on my watch...
>>710551853
L-Like what?
Also this Pomelo I am eating is a bit unwieldy. What *is* this thing.
>>710551919
Oops. Quick, act normal!
>>710551962
I've never had one, but it's supposed to taste like a less bitter grapefruit, right?
Sure. No clue what to do. Do I chase my passion that I was good at 10 years ago, even if it's a slim chance I'll succeed at it? Do I keep at a dead end, unrewarding, frustrating job because I have experience with it? Do I learn a trade whether I'm qualified for it or not just because that's a sensible idea? And where can I find love and happiness in all of that? Seems like I'm losing a battle with lethargy every day. A reading too, I guess.
>>710552205
That depends, what's your passion? And are you still passionate about it?
In 1940, Alexander Actionlander invented action.
In 1823, Bouncy Bitchface invented the bouncy ball.
In 1674, Commander Catwizard invented the cat.
In 1509, Delicious Dante invented the dildo.
This is all true. I am many things, but I am not a liar.
tfw you get one-tapped by a Yak-1
Hey, a reading would be cool. I'm kind of at an impasse in my life and dont know which direction to go. For a nickname uhhh my friends used to call me nickels
>>710552126
Right, acting normal now!
And yes it is suprisingly mellow even if it smells absurdly sour. Also there's like a 3 inch layer of skin, I feel duped thinking it was this giant ball of flesh. It's still big, just not as much as I imagined.
>>710552205
Is there any chance for you to do the hobby on the side?
>>710552213
*pats your head*
>>710552213
You definitely require more ribbons.
>>710552126
It's not like i can stop you two from doing whatever you were planning to do, i'll just stay in a corner without bothering.
>>710552205
First question, do you still feel passion for what you used to do? If you want to try, you should definitly do, but a smart idea would be making a safety net just in case, I don't really understand much about what's your current sitution but if it is related to jobs, you should make a safety net, so in case it doesn't works out, you won't be screwed. What do you say?
Also, hello everyone.
>>710552392
On December 19, at 7:32 A.M, the Universe will stop existing for about a second and a half.
When it starts up again, everyone will be gender-swapped.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=69V9J6YRfi4
>>710552323
I always liked to write, and was pretty good at it sometimes, but I lost my motivation in vidya. I'd like to create something in either, but it's a slim chance that I'd be successful in either with how saturated the market is in both.
>>710551198
Hey Reimu!
Hello all!
>>710552635
If you eat an ear of corn in under 30 seconds while beheading a major world leader, you will gain all the powers of a microwave.
>>710552392
Then who was Bast?
>>710552433
>King of Wands
Your current path is one of overcoming a disadvantaged start in life to achieve success. Material gains may accompany that, but what's more important is accomplishment and satisfaction.
>King of Cups
Both of these cards have to do with the arts, so I'm sensing a strong proclivity toward some kind of artistic field.
>Two of Wands (Reversed)
However, you're having a creative block brought about by your unwillingness to confront a certain responsibility in your life. Only when you identify and clear that hurdle can you proceed.
>>710552213
Uu!
>>710552708
On December 19, at 7:32 A.M, blue nigger will stop sucking black dick for about a second and a half.
When it starts up again, he will be sucking horse cock.
>>710552910
>
Someone is asking for it...
>>710551198
Real question here. So my wife enjoys pain and being submissive in bed but we have only done anal once. It didn't really hurt her (We used lots of lube and I went pretty easy on her.) and while she didn't hate her first time she did not really get a ton out of it. The problem is that I REALLY want to fuck her ass so hard and without lube that it hurts her and makes her cry. How can I go about convincing her of this? Or should I just wait for the next time she lets me tie her up and do it anyways?
>>710552708
Huh...are you making this up to satisfy some kind of odd need you have that we are not informed about?
>>710552501
I wanna hear your voice again soon!
>>710552537
I know, right?
>>710552919
Auuuu..
>>710552919
I want to ____________ Reimu OP!
>>710552919
holy shit...
Get am I gonna get laid tonight?
>>710552501
>>710552635
Could always do what I love on the side, I understand that. There's a lot of time and effort I lose to entertainment and I realize some days that I have nothing to show for it.
>>710553066
You shouldn't do anything of the sort. If she really enjoys pain then you should tell her that you want to try less lube next time you try anal. Then, if she agrees, just go light on it. Never go in without lube. Seriously, I promise you. Fucking horrible idea.
>>710552826
Keep your day job, maybe consider learning a trade like you said. Find something that you either like, or don't hate so much that it kills your will to live. Even if you're not qualified, that's the whole point of learning it!
Do that, while also making sure to keep taking steps toward your writing career. It might be a long shot, but with enough work and time you CAN make it in that. The only issue is supporting yourself until you break through, so look at anything else you might have to do along the way as just another step toward your dream!
>>710552846
Hey there.
>>710553066
If she enjoys pain, why does she need to be convinced?
>>710552919
Big
Awesome
Scrotum
Tickler.
Bast, or Bastet?
She's the Bastet what she does.
>>710553002
You mad about this dick, white boy?
>>710553057
Th-This is photoshopped.
>>710553102
No.
>>710553102
This is the funniest interpretation ever.
>>710553119
I-I wouldn't know why..
>>710552537
Are you trying to indirectly charm me by revealing your love of ribbons? Because I looove ribbons.
>>710553298
Maaaybe you should find a library nearby you, then after work or whenever you have time, arrange a schedule to be there just to work on your writing.
>>710553119
What's wrong?
>>710553121
<hold hands>?! OH MY GOD THAT'S SICK!
>>710553165
Hmm?
>>710553298
Also, start looking at entertainment as training. You should be studying the games you play, the movies you watch, and the books you read. Examine the writing. Question why they did what they did, and how. Maybe there you'll find some inspiration for your own stuff!
>>710553066
Ask her, maybe she's into other kind of pain, like, knifeplay and such, but, if ask her what is she ok with.
>>710553205
Uhm, yeah sure thing kiddo. Why not?
>>710553298
Set aside one hour of everyday and force yourself to write, do it for long enough and you'll get used to write, even if you don't feel very motivated! What kind of things do you enjoy writing?>>710553529
N e r d
>>710552635
Hello Nep!
How goes it?
>>710553834
Is not! How was your day, Reimu OP?
>>710553889
I-I'm not the nerd, you're the one dressing up like a demon.
What kind of nerd needs clothes to be intimidating?
>>710554005
Pretty relaxed. I had the day off from my other job, so I've just been lazing around playing games all day.
>>710553529
No, just bored. Decided to poke the dumb one with a stick.
>>710553551
Oh my goood you gave her your voice! That's almost like kissing someone here...i think.
>>710553551
I would never try to charm you, i'm not good with that kind of things, but not because you're not worthy of being charmed! It's just that i can't really do these things properly, it would end up in a disaster, oh and it took me a while to get the Pokemon reference, you could definitely wear the ribbons you won though, i bet there's a fan art out there that depicts that!
>>710553529
Liar.
>>710553470
Suppose that is a possibility
>>710553359
Well, she enjoys some pain. And since she is new to anal she is afraid of getting really hurt. Thing is I love the idea of her still being this new to anal and her inexperience making it so easy to hurt her. When she gets used to it I won't be able to get as much out of it.
>>710553889
Hmm, maybe. I guess it doesn't have to be anal as long as I can make her cry and have my way with her.
>>710554152
Dumb?
Nah, you just can't understand me.
>>710554249
I am cute.
>>710553979
Hello, pretty decent I guess. You?
>>710554018
>Intimidating
Someone doesn't gets laid enough.
>>710554260
Set a safeword and try not to cripple her, stallion.
>>710553470
>>710553551
>>710553834
Thanks for the advice guys, I appreciate it and will try to take it to heart.
>>710553889
Thank you, I'll try to do that. I need to brute force past the whole motivation thing. I used to do a lot of first person narrative since I'm pretty ego-centric. Someone later said it was prose poetry. I was never really sure. I just liked to write stories.
Anyway, gotta go. Cheers, all.
>>710553834
oh nothing its just that reading was pretty fucking spot on
I'm just curious what the responsibility is that im refusing to accept
>>710554319
You're dumb enough to respond consistently, so you're dumb enough for me.
>>710551198
>>710554115
cool, what'd you play? that game your friend bought you?
Hey I made it
~fred
>>710554505
Cheers, I wish you luck!
>>710554511
>That reading was pretty spot on
Sometimes its even scary, right?
>>710554434
I'm good!
I'm off work tonite. Gonna hang out with some friends later.
Getting comfy now.
>>710554434
>Someone doesn't gets laid enough.
Th-There are more direct ways to ask, you foolish tsundere.
>>710554517
>it's the "I-I-If you even RESPOND to me that means you're retarded! Wh-Why are you arguing? I-I-If you keep arguing, th-that means you're stupid!" meme
>>710554611
I will now show off my power by turning your panties into solid gold, which has a density of 19.32 grams per cubic centimeter.
>>710554260
You can cause serious damage by going in dry that way. Which is why you shouldn't. Going in with less lube than recommended might be fine but going in dry won't be. If you want to make her cry, why not try simply tying her up and torturing her with pinching and squeezing, teasing, that sort of thing?
Is it just me or are you making threads more often lately?
>>710554835
You just proved my point even more. Keep responding, go right ahead.
Well I somehow managed to do this at the end of class today
>>710554319
You should take better care of your skin if you really want to be cute.
>Or you could become like Pewdiepie, his name was Felix but he did not like that very much, and he said "I will become like Pewdiepie" and that's what he became.
>>710554249
I *did* give her my voice, I need to find her and reclaim it!
>>710554249
Hehe, I'm so glad I have a Pokemon friend to send my horrible Pokemon puns to!
Also, this is as good as it gets when it comes to Hikari and her ribbons picture. I may have to screencap something from the episodes now..
>>710555057
You have no idea what my skin feels like, fuckboy.
You can find out, if you want...
>>710554511
Since you got dubs again, let's see!
>The Tower (Reversed)
It has something to do with an unhealthy lifestyle and disorganization affecting your confidence. Try examining your habits to see what can be changed for your own good!
>>710554658
Mostly. That and a little more Morrowind.
>>710554611
Yay, pictures of me!
>>710555046
Son, I am proud... what did you used to do that? lol.
>>710554835
>Implying
>Implying this hard.
>I expected more from you than that blue new york.
>>710554938
I believe it has been the regular schedules tho.
>>710554938
I've done three days a week almost for as long as I've been doing this, with a few gaps here and there.
>>710555046
What
>>710555247
Nothankyou.avi
>>710555106
So i'm guessing your friendship with her got to a whole new level now, can i keep up with it without having to give away my personal things?
>>710555106
They're not horrible at all! First, it was an original joke, which is like already huge on its own, second, it was told by one of my best friends ever, so it can't be bad.
holy fuck
why are crickets such a piece of shit bug?
>>710555803
The crickets love you, Anon!
They want to sing their little song to you!
>>710555247
>>710555789
W-What? No, you silly.
Did you want me to share with you my voice too? :O
And good, good. Now I will send you a stream of pokepuns heheh.
>>710555859
I'm having to fight the red (black?) wave of these little creepy shits. I had to use a golf club and a book to kill them earlier.
>>710555603
Maybe I've just been around more during those few gaps..
>>710555528
I probably just was around during the dead weeks
>>710554434
Not a stallion really, I just never got over that tormenting and bully the girl I like phase.
>>710554929
That's fair. Minimal lube sounds like the smart plan for some fun painal. Still need a good way to bring up to her that I want it and don't really care if she enjoys it or not this one time...
roll
>>710555884
This cunt better watch out for November 22.
>>710556224
what's then? thanksgiving?
reroll
Tarot reading for phifer0
>>710555859
Crickets??!!
Where?
>>710556375
wtf reroll
>>710555528
I pulled my laptop charger out normally and it sparked for some reason and burnet the outlet, and my charger
>>710555603
For some stupid reason my charger decided to spark when unplugging it and did that
>>710556010
Nonononono i would never ask you to do something like that! I'll be your friend nonetheless if Reisen gives you her voice and i don't, right?
>>710556253
It's November 10. There is a circulatory system walking through the kitchen.
It's November 14. A partially muscled skeleton stands by the perimeter fence and screams for thirty seconds before vanishing
It's November 22...
>>710556381
>phifer0 has extremely good luck this year. Lucky keywords: "Blue", "40".
heres a fortune cookie in the meantime
>>710556253
It's when his blueberry powers are at their strongest
Oh my
I actually forgot about the thread
Sorry I'm late
-Sweet Roll
>>710556163
Ha, these kids... anyway, again, ask her what is she into and propose her what you want to try. There is no fun if you break her. And I mean it, don't go around breaking your partner.
R e s p o n s a b i l i t y.
>>710556484
Happened to me once before, left the entire house without power, glad I was alone and fixed it on my own. Buy a new charger from the internet.
(Try a fork next time, *wink wink*)
>>710557147
why does it look like he's getting a handjob
>>710556962
Eh. I'll pass on the fork. I like living.
But it seems like no one heard the pop or saw the spark other than the guy next to me.
From that I see it only affected that outlet at most. And luckily I got an extra charger any way.
Just a kinda funny occurrence
>>710557198
Because he is
>>710557198
He wants to tell the conductor about the sick brojob he's getting.
>>710557273
My charger got cut all over with the time, royally fucked beyond repair sadly, I don't have a few bucks for a new charger either, so that's that.
Looking for just a general reading ^^
>>710555461
Ahh, good, Khajiit have many wares for you to try, outlander
bump
>>710558141
Why is that pigeon wearing a hat?
>>710558141
>>710558209
You two are adorable
>>710558209
That's Aya.
>>710558141
Hello!
>>710558209
Its actually Aya Shameimaru, another touhou character
or Box
-Sweet Roll
>>710558404
That is top lewd.
Also that Pomelo was not very satisfying. I am just buying a grapefruit next time.
>>710558404
>reimu Op approaching levels of lewd
aww yis
bump
>>710558551
You feeling left out? I will gladly help you be lewd too, I heard Dawn has a tight little ass!
>>710558384
Awww, thank you!
>>710558413
Heya.
>>710558551
Sounds like it. Who'd want a less sour grapefruit with more peeling? I don't like grapefruits either, though.
>>710558673
その権利はありますか？
Oh, we're being lewd now?
>>710559093
What about me, you, lewdtastic anon?
Did someone say lewd?
>>710559112
Ah.. um.. yes, hai, yes.. h-hai..
I can be lewd too
~fred
>>710559093
Now *that* is top lewd..
>>710558384
That's not true, anon..
>>710559112
Do you not like sour at all? I bet you don't even like lemons.
>>710559516
Its fred, and its true
>>710559419
Hello Lewdmu
How are you?
-Sweet Roll
>>710558549
I miss Box.
>>710559568
Shhhh, it's not~
>>710559344
My kind of girl.
>>710560007
Adorable
what I miss?
>>710559516
I like lemons, just not by themselves. I guess you could say I'm not a fan of most sour stuff though.
>>710559419
My nigga.
>>710560023
This is perfect, thanks!
>>710560179
Pickles is the good stuff.
>>710559175
D-Does nobody think I'm cute enough?
>>710560499
You're the cutest, I thought you already knew that
~fred
>>710560580
Thank you!
>>710560179
I DON'T WANT YOUR DAMN LEMONS!
WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THESE?
I'LL BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN!
WITH THE LEMONS!
-Sweet Roll
>>710560499
>>710560179
Sour stuff is a staple of my diet, I am just salivating at the thought of something sour. Spicy pickles, raw lemons, etc..
>>710560499
I still remember when you said I complained too much!
>>710560666
What about now?
Shapeshifting is fun.
Checked, by the way.
>>710560667
Who will win the 2016 election?
>>710559763
Just chilling, what about you?
>>710560482
Sup Nep? Too much lewd made you nosebleed?
>>710559175
>dat ass
>>710559344
You're hot as fuck.
Nice Dubbs, too, btw
>>710560904
SATAN HAS SPOKEN FOOL
>>710560904
You pretty much just need to look at this year's swing states, and reliable political models from 538 and RCP already forecast th-
I mean, I'm not going to talk about politics, you silly Dr!
>>710561009
I'll end up in the ER cause of the lewds.
>>710561116
HELP, A BUG JUST SEXUALLY HARASSED ME, AAAAAAH!! *Blows rape whistle*
>>710560666
Lmao, checked.
>>710561142
I like this guy.
>>710560482
No problem.
>>710561307
So Dawn, how about that buttsex we spoke about?
What should I do tomorrow?
>>710560667
Sour stuff is awesome
Pickles, and sour candies for me mostly
I actually really don't like sweet pickles, sour pickles are clearly superior and are true pickles
My mouth waters whenever I am about to have extremely sour candy, and it is a good experience. Also, just the scent alone of sour neon gummy worms is great, I crack open a 550g container of those every two weeks, and finish it on the same day
-Sweet Roll
>>710561633
Learn how to throw playing cards.
Its pretty fun once you learn.
>>710561142
CURSE.
...
Cutest-Around
Underwear-Sniffing
Rambutan-Eating
Slutty-Boy
Ear-Licker.
>>710561307
Yeah, I have been following the sites and looking at what outcomes are likely.
>>710561674
I love pickles.
>>710561142
How goes it?
>>710561725
Been a long time since I tried that. I will try it then.
>>710561583
I could probably take a raincheck on that, I'm not ready!
>>710561674
Woah, that's a lot of gummies. I used to love those sour altoids that would chemically burn the insides of your mouth. Soo delicious. It's a shame they took them off the market for precisely that reason.
>>710561752
I'm super surprised by NH.
>>710561009
I have been fine, my sleep schedule has been working good for me
Also just stuck in a rut, it's not as good as other similar ruts, but it's okay
-Sweet Roll
>>710561583
Saved, you sure seem to like poopers, lewdtastic anon.
>>710561633
Live /music plays
Anyway, where do you live and what do you enjoy?
>>710562013
It is. I can throw my ID card and Hotel keys, but not cards.
I'm an awkwardly ugly 24 year-old kissless virgin male.
>>710562178
get fit
get a good haircut
get clothes tailored to your new body
read "how to win friends and influence people"
find a hobby to be passionate about
>>710562178
*kisses*
>>710562343
this minus the book
>>710562395
the book is good shit
>>710562049
Oh, that is the way I like it! Now hurry up and bring that ass over here!
>>710562132
There is just something wonderful about forcing a cock deep in a girl's cute ass. The tightness, the pain it causes, the humilation, it sort of feels like consensual rape!
>>710562132
It's an hour long bus ride into the city and even then not much to do.
Other then throwing cards my best bets is to go to a friends house or paint some more.
>>710562343
so, kill myself and born again?
>>710562436
the book makes you sound even more socially inept
>>710562517
what's your beef with it
you cant criticize something you havent read
>>710562178
Just like the rest of the people here.
You're in good company.
>>710562590
>having to read a book on how to win friends
if someone heard about that you would never hear the end of it
>>710562508
metaphorically, sure.
>>710562590
He's too insecure to go out and buy a book :--}}
>>710562508
Success doesn't comes from being lazy, you have to work your ass of in being successful so you can be lazy when you're older.
>>710562796
the title is admittedly dumb and sounds like hippie self-help crap
but if there's any book that's good at getting you to come off as even a slighty better person, it's this book
it's also pretty famous and well known
>>710562481
You could pirate some old games! It is what I do sometimes, or read mangas and such. I'm not very sociable :^)
>>710562049
It can be worse
On some occasions, I would buy a same size pack of gummy bears too, thats 2 whole pounds of candy
But I don't eat it all in one go, normally it takes me a whole day to finish either one or two, and it's only once every two weeks, so no OD for me
-Sweet Roll
>>710562974
but if there's any book that's good at getting you >to come off as even a slighty better person, it's this book
>it's also pretty famous and well known
Are you talking about Mein Kampf, or are you talking about Mein Kampf?
>>710563149
all the more power to you if you can read mein kampf and come off as a better person
>>710562100
Good for you, if you are okay with that. You should consider doing something new every now and then so you don't end up stuck in those ruts, don't you think?
>>710561404
You should lewd yourself too!
>>710563204
>quote mein kampf
>no-one notices
It makes me feel like a better person if thats what you are talking about.
What's going on in this thread?
>>710563463
absolute HERESY
>>710563463
You're awaaaaaake Seija!
>>710563583
What'sup Hikari
>>710563776
bell is that you
>>710563463
We were talking about how bad you smell.
>>710551198
Hi - PotatoBrotato00
>>710563994
Are you telling me my new cologne is bad? It's made from like, beaver bungholes or something.
>>710564417
nah bunghole is a pleasant aroma
reimu is ded
>>710563894
i dont know, is it?
>>710563351
Normally all of my ruts are the same, with little differences here and there, one big thing that helps decide is my mental state during them, currently I have had better overall moods. But then again, my mental state during them is effected by those little changes. Currently I am recovering from heavy Overwatch burnout, and there is not a lot of entertaining stuff on youtube currently, not a lot of lunch food at my house, or my favourite food, ramen noodles (inb4 weeb, I just really like noodles)
TL;DR I am happiest in a rut if there is good geimu, enough food, and enough entertainment
-Sweet Roll
>>710564059
>PotatoBrotato00 has very bad luck this year. Lucky keywords: "Yellow", "5".
bad luck is only for a bit longer
>>710564765
yes
I jus got her I ned a new thred
>>710565310
no new bread
>>710565454
Yes mor bred
Is oven broken?
>>710564771
Oh, then try to keep those things that make you fell good, Sweety.
>>710565729
Oven is broken RIP bread
>>710565729
oven broken or the baker left
>>710551198
care to fortune?
Call me ; I suppose
>>710565900
Baker broken
>>710565940
>; has bad luck this year. Lucky keywords: "Yellow", "47".
least its only 2 more months of bad luck
>>710565989
Who broke the baker?
~Neptune
>>710566137
I ate the baker
>>710566183
You were supposed to eat what she baked, not the baker herself, god damn it anon. :,^(
~Neptune
>>710566072
>>710566072
mfw I'm clapping with one hand
nvm img cap
thanks for reading though :D
new thread?
>>710566648
bread is dead
>>710566765
Nooooooooooooo but I just got here!
Time to commit neppuku.
>>710566908
You called, anon-sama?
~Neptune
>>710567162
If I take your pudding, will you please disembowel me honorably?
>>710567208
The disembowelment is usually done by the dishonored samurai, althought there is someone who aids them complete their "ritual" by chopping off their heads afterwards, gimme me what's left of your pudding and we got a deal.
~Neptune
>>710567530
Sweet. Thanks Neppu! I'll get some high quality pudding for you.
>>710567623
I'll go get a katana in the meanwhile.
~Neptune
I wonder if Reimu just got distracted.
A royal mess, in truth.
>>710567845
Woo! I'll finally get my much desired rest at the hands of a cute girl!
Probably too late, but it'll be what it is
>>710568273
