Every day until you want one.
I'm going to keep a platypus thread up every day until all of an wants to own a puggle for cuddles.
>>710515191
Day 1: I don't want a platypus yet
>>710515217
Sounds like you need more platyfacts and pics.
Platypus's store fat in their tails like reptiles.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=_OFeOZw7efw
>>710515191
Day 468
Still want one.
>tfw no platypus
I remember hearing somewhere that they don't do much, if that's true I don't really care for them
>>710515297
You have been deceived good sir.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=RenOVGJCoNE
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=MwtPzOmHz5w
>>710515191
>poisonous spurs
>infant gets pricked and dies
>sentenced to 20 years in prison for child neglect, child endangerment, manslaughter.
>hang yourself in 2 weeks anyways because of guilt
>wife never made it to trial, OD'd on pills because of guilt
>platypus euthanized because it killed a child
>>710515337
this
>>710515337
>letting a dangerous animal of any kind near a child
>>710515337
Only the males are venomous. The females are harmless and affectionate. They're like funny little penguin otters.
>>710515337
>not routinely spurring your child so it develops a tolerance and becomes platypus themed super hero
>>710515191
How do we know for sure that they aren't alien genetic experiments?
>>710515471
this
Australian duck dogs
>>710515425
kek
>>710515191
>>710515537
When I get home I'm shooping the fish into a platypus.
>>710515191
is that its anus whole? are those feces stains?
fucking disgusting. get that thing out of my face
>>710515580
on a related note: wtf, google
>>710515580
Monotremes are very highly modified for their particular ecological niches. The platypus is a semiaquatic carnivore-insectivore, and the echidnas have a specialized diet of small invertebrates such as ants, termites, and worms. The name Monotremata means “one-holed,” in reference to the fact that both sexes have only one opening at the rear of the body, which is used for both reproduction and excretion.
It's called a cloaca.
Wtf do you feed it? Don't they need water to live in?
>>710515580
Mocking the cuddle hole you must be new here.
This thread made me want one, if only they weren't venomous.
>>710515608
it's because beaver glands are used in vanilla or something. dunno how that made sense to google to link them, but that's why.
>>710515683
Only the males have spurs. The females are safe and friendly.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=qgwQ12Z3q-k
>>710515738
What do their beaks feel like?
Platypodes are the ugliest birds in existence. Everything Australia touches looks retarded
>>710515647
How the fuck am I supposed to know?
>>710515191
>>710515258
>>710515279
>>710515683
>>710515764
>wanting a marine mammal as a pet
do you guys also want a dolphin and a whale because they looke AW SO CUTE on some youtube video?
people who want platypussies are the cancer of animal owners.
>>710515820
YOU CAN NEVER DENY OUR LOVE!
>>710515857
Pedophile dolphins, never thought I'd see that. Welp, gotta string em up.
>>710515857
>what am I doing with my life?
>>710515657
lmao
>>710515764
Soft and a cross between leathery and rubbery. They don't have teeth either they have flat grinding pads on the top and bottom of their mouths that are somewhat like fingernail material in texture. The bill is actually hollow with a bifurcated bone and is slightly flexible. It's external skin layer is a sensor organ and is extremely sensitive to temperature touch and vibration and electromagnetic impulses. It's their primary means of detecting prey underwater and they use it to build mental amps of their environment like raccoons do with their hands. Sorry there's not a better picture of it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4WXr_wIJz4Q
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PqXdqhFnjTY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SUt3w7mrwC4
>>710515632
Fun fact- platypus and echidna are the only 2 mammal species alive today that do not have 7 neck bones.
>>710515710
>be me, perfume enthusiast
>buy some castoreum
>'google, what are some classic formulas I could try'
>four billion clickbait articles and vegan screeds about obsolete vanilla alternatives nobody uses anymore
Fucking Google.
>>710515973
>perfume enthusiast
wtf dude, sounds like a boring hobby. or do you make your own?
>>710515191
They have toxic barbs for raping.
get rid of those before we talk
>>710516009
Platypuses do not rape. Even the males who do get to mate successfully must first be approved by the female by completing the courtship dance. The barbs are used defensively and for dueling other males for territorial mating rights.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F7H7sR7VEEI
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=btUGDQXMoqY
The mating dynamic begins at about 20 min in.
>>710515191
Platypus = NO
Sloth = YES!!
>>710516066
Platypuses = yes
Sloths = slow.
>>710515318
>Platypus'
It's a reference to Phineas & Ferb.
>>710516113
I know I was just posting platypus videos that I liked.
>>710516138
Every day platybamp.
>>710515608
WTF I hate beavers now.
Also why dont you whant a platypus yet?
It's time for a platypounding!
>>710515820
What am I reading? You need more Platypuses in your life.
>>710515191
Platypus, the shy little covops shadow of the creek. Why in the shit would you want to make a pet of one, the fuck is wrong with you?
Can't an animal be awesome and live it's life? You think you're taking part IN that awesome by putting it in a cage? You're taking part OF it.
>>710515953
Slightly related, Australia was a thundering ecosystem of marsupials and monotremes that had equivalents for every niche, wolf, squirrel, bear, mole, mouse...many types are known only by their teeth, there's wacky teeth had prongs facing sideways, mystery teeth. Huge kangaroos and wombats the size of cars. What's left is the quiet echo of those times, slow animals pretty much vulnerable to anything like cats or dogs.
>>710516041
Jesus Christ. Is EVERYTHING in Aussieland poisonous?
I need one
>>710515191
well I don't want one. I want a pony.
>>710515953
That's not true. Monotreme cervical vertebrae bare cervical ribs, which is unique among mammals, but they still have seven.
You're thinking of manatees and sloths.
>>710516066
>>710516092
Just splice them into some sort of slothypus
What a cute little abomination.
>>710516295
Straya sounds amazing senpai.
>>710516358
Oh you'll come around eventually.
Every day until you want one.
>>710515632
Ew so when they fuck they get poop dick?
>implying i already don't want one
>>710516505
Nah... most cloaca-bearers shit out little parcels, often at a solid pace, so it doesn't leave a mess. No dingleberries on this platypus pus.
>>710515764
Breddy... soft desu.. But different.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bf4v3hmKMwQ
>>710516486
Where the fuck do you buy them?
>>710515191
is that a duck?
>>710515191
Platypus is a qt :3
>>710515471
nigga all the life in earth was made by aliens and yes that includes trees and sheeit
>>710516589
You don't unfortunately. Australia is extremely stingy with their waddle honkers unfortunately.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=SUt3w7mrwC4
>>710515191
Would rather have an echidna puggle
>>710516690
But it is dangerous to snuggle a spiny ant eater.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=pQ25C1XPVUA
>>710516547
But shit all over your place. That doesn't sound too cool. Maybe if I lived in America's Straya but not inside.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dsd7ZfdZcNU
>>710515857
Do what you must human I have already won.
>>710515580
It's rude to stare.
>>710515191
Get a life and watch Louder with Crowder, its a better use of time than this BS
platypuses aren't even real.
>>710516799
Well I don't think you're real.
>>710515217
Do you want one yet? Because you should.
>>710516735
That x-ray makes it's mouth look like the fucking Predator.
Every day until you want one.
So cute. I want to cuddle one.
>>710515337
So dangerous.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=qXQ4WrNbSeY
>>710516358
Do you want one yet? Because you should.
>>710515191
Day 19 want one status. Do want.
>>710515191
I'm sceptical. In all those pics of people playing with cute platypuses, the people are clearly wearing zookeeper uniforms.
Can an ordinary person really care for one properly? If not, why are you encouraging ordinary people to get them as pets? There are enough cases of neglected exotic pets already, don't you think?
It's day 18.
I want one
Day one. I want one.
>>710517026
>>710517026
Because platypus ownership is illegal, and no platypus actually exist in captivity outside Australia. They're hard to breed, expensive to house and feed, and currently difficult just to keep alive long-term. Of course this underage loser is never going to care for one properly, but at least there's some comfort in knowing they'll never get exported from Aus in the first place.
I wonder what they taste like? Some abbo has to have eaten one. I saw Crocodile Dundee, dude ate a bat.
>>710517078
Australians and New Zealanders are just cunts about their wildlife.
You can't even export easy to breed abundant animals anymore.
Say you want to export some insects or reptilians to breed them and then sell the offspring in Europe and American as pets then the Aus Gov will go "Nah fuck off m8 they're ours you can't have them lol"
>>710517102
Try to get a panda, it's even harder.
Laws like that make the illegal pet trade so succesful, and then you can't keep track of the animals.
>>710517026
Healsvill is the only location with an interactive platypus display that I am aware of. They also have the worlds oldest platypus and were the first to breed them in captivity. One of the reasons why there is always a keeper on hand is to protect the animal because theey are so valuable. If someone were to mishandle and injure one they would be out tens of thousands of dollars. The platypus display is a major tourist attraction and is big business for them and it has been for quite some time.
>>710515337
well aren't you just a fuckin ray of sunshine
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dsd7ZfdZcNU
>>710515337
platypus venom isnt deadly though
>>710515191
But anon, Kiwis are cuter
So are these guys making a comeback? Are they breeding them in captivity and releasing them into the wild?
Lol
>>710517102
>tfw carpet pythons are one of my absolute favorite animals
The stuff we have in the US is noce and all but the stuff i see from aus just pisses me off since you cant even export cb animals that are native to aus
>>710517102
>>710517328
Yep. Breeders in straya have some pretty cool antaresia python morphs going but we may not have. Pic related is a very neat looking childrens python.
>>710517169
nice dubs
>>710517339
trip double double and i forget the pic ( ._.)
>>710517078
>>710515820
So much salt for a platypus thread. You clearly need more Platypuses in your life.
>>710517382
Every day until an wants one
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XZPwqMx3b9o
>>710517382
If you truly loved platupuses, you wouldn't encourage random strangers on 4chan to get them as pets.
>>710517415
Not like a private person, let alone someone outside of Australia, would ever be able to get one in their lifetime.
>>710517428
I suspected as much. Then what's the point whith OP wanting us to "want one".
>>710515191
>illegal to own
>nearly impossible to take care of properly
>not domesticated
>venomous/dangerous (What did you expect? They're from Australia!)
>no studies on their intelligence
>semiaquatic
No thanks.
It's fucking "Platypi"
>>710517444
I'll level with you anon's.
1. I really really love platypuses.
2. In previous threads I have learned things about them that would be useful should I actually manage to acquire one at a much later date in a responsible manner.
3. Platypus threads are usually pretty good so hopefully it can just be a good consistent thread to post favorite animals and do some mild shitposting.
>>710517268
Not even close
It appears an may need more persuasion.
>>710515191
ha
Why the fuck is Australia so stingy with their wildlife? I wanted to export some fish from there but of course they are greedy bastards and keep everything to themselves. Like you can have the highest class exhibit and they still wouldn't let you have a platypus
>>710517579
This I wouldn't want to get one until I had a facility at least as good as the one a beauty point. Looks like I'm going to have sail a boat to a remote tributary in Tasmania after I retire.
Are they rare in Australia? Like in the wild?
>>710517482
shut up stupid cunt
Every day until you want one.
those fuckers are fucking venomous
>>710515217
How about now?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aan3RiVgAP0
>>710517550
Haha guys get him out!!
He's stuck in that hat hahaha!
Somebody do something!!! Hah
He's stuck in tha party hat lol! !
Haha silly partie platipus
Somebody do!!! Something
Get him out hahaha
!
>>710517579
They are paranoid because of their own fuck-ups with invasive species.
>>710517603
I don't know
>>710515191
>males has venomous spurs
No thanks.
>>710517487
>1. I really really love platypuses.
Yeah, we gathered that much. I just hope you don't >like them, like them.
>Has been told multiple times they're illegal and difficult to care for
>Still responds with "b-but I want one"
How old are you OP? Are you a little faggot kid who sits watching Phineas and Ferb all day?
>>710517638
not really
>>710515456
Turning your baby into Flipper master rave
>>710517754
Do you want one yet?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8kqqriAGTZc
>>710515191
Want
>>710515820
I don't want a whale because whales are fucking huge you fuckwit, I'd like a seahorse or a turtle though, because that is entirely plausible you false equivalence spouting fool
>>710517720
I mean, like I really like playpuses
>>710515608
Do birds have an anus
>>710515337
>Sleeps on warm things
>infant suffocates and dies
>sentenced to 20 years in prison for child neglect, child endangerment, manslaughter.
>hang yourself in 2 weeks anyways because of guilt
>wife never made it to trial, OD'd on pills because of guilt
>Cat euthanized because it killed a child
>>710517823
Birds have a cloaca.
They piss and shit and fuck through the same hole.
Same as reptiles.
>>710517866
How do birds have sex
>>710515632
Marsupial moles also have cloacas. They might be dryolestoids instead of marsupials
>>710517845
>equaling the danger posed by an actual highly venomous animal to some anecdotal old wife's tale
>>710515191
It's an otterquack
>>710517812
Ah goddammit. I knew it. OP wants to fuck a platypus.
>>710515191
>>710517946
No he just has awesome.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XZPwqMx3b9o
If you don't want one of these I don't even know what to say.
>>710517989
I don't want one because I know very well that I can't care for it.
Unless you happen to own a private zoo, and have a private army of zookeepers, vets and biologists, you shouldn't get one, either.
Not that any of us could get our hands on one, even if we wanted to.
They simply aren't private pets. Get over it and stop forcing your own private meme.
>>710515191
>tfw no platypal
>>710517934
kek, I'm not OP
>>710515191
cats>platypuses
>>710518021
agreed
>>710518100
Everyone agrees man, except just one autistic samefag OP who won't shut up
>>710515337
The best thing on this thread.
>>710518056
I know dem feels mang. That's why I post one every day.
>>710518162
This thread made me realize platypuses are just furry acuatic lizards. I don't like em at all.
I don't want one but I want to touch one
>>710516671
Quindi l'entusiasta degli ornitorinchi è italiano
Good to know
>>710515820
>do you guys also want a dolphin and a whale
Yes
>>710515318
>those tattoos
>>710517924
Only the males have painful venomous spikes.
>>710516295
FUCKING """"NATIVE"""" ABO SCUM
Burnt down huge swathes of jungle and habitat, hunted a huge amount of native species to death, sperg out when mungo man is discovered that's older than their purported migration into the country and with different genetics because they know their jig is up.
>>710518210
Every day.
Heres some more ornitorrinco action.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rk_LT-khPhw
>>710515191
Wrong board, platypuses aren't animals or nature.
>>710518356
Your not animals or nature. Every day until you want one.
>>710518385
looks like a fat shell-less tortoise.
>Be a monotreme
>Enter Australian freshwater systems
>Mutate away most of your land locomotion for webbed feet so you are now doomed to be the FRESHWATER forever better hope the water doesnt dry up too soon faggot
>Next I mutate my freaking jaw into a beak because I wanted to look really special not realizing just how good a jaw is compared to shitty beak that cant chew shit
>Realised that placental Otters would completely assrape me in my own envinronment
Being a platypus is just hilarious.
>>710518385
I'm not saying they're not cool, I'm saying this is the wrong board. Try /o/ or /g/?
>>710515795
Can confirm.
Source: am Australian.
>>710518467
I don't believe you post a puggle with time stamp or fake and gay. Also everyday until you want one.
>>710518493
Dooby dooby doo bamp. Every day.
>>710515337
And even the male's poison is variable: it is more potent during breeding season.
>>710515857
Mmm: dolphin-flavour!
>>710515912
...mental MAPS
>>710515580
I would stick my dick in that hole and fuck the shit out of it
>>710517339
Childrens python... how many children does it eat?
>>710517887
The male's cloaca 'everts' (turns inside out, and penis (or equivalent, i can't recall enough high school biology) emerges, does the deed and retracts. Often all very quickly. Its the path evolution took from reptiles to mammals, and birds have reptile-like bits.
>>710517946
maybe, but he sure can find lots of worms in the creek
>>710518300
Uh, no. They may have hunted HUGE species to extinction, or helped them along: 9m goanna; 2 tonne wombat - megafauna.
The vegetation has adapted to regular burning, and the animals must have vegetation to eat, so it all works out.
Mungo man is not older than their entry to the continent, according to latest estimates.
>>710516041
looks like fleas
>>710515191
>that little nugget of shit
not for me thanks
>>710518693
Ticks actually. They have their own species that can survive being submerged in water for 14 hours at a time.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LGKqFGGAj_k
Every day.
Niggerdicks
>>710518774
>>710518795
>>710518851
I don't get it. But I also don't understand why an doesn't want a platypus yet.
>>710518902
Yeah I see the words but I still don't get why you don't want one.
>>710518902
but the venomous barbs is only true for males
>>710516671
Damn I hate Australia now.
>>710518923
They look gay and faggi.
>>710518992
I don't think I like you. Every day until you want one.
>>710515764
Like a bag of sand.
>>710519049
Nope not even close.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bf4v3hmKMwQ
>>710515764
There you go dafinative answer.
>>710515191
they sweat milk
>>710519068
Every day.
>>710515608
>Not knowing platypus anus taste like Vanilla
You must be new here.
>>710519109
I thought it was shnozberry.
Dang I missed a day. My bad an.
>>710519158
I forgive you, just don't let me down again.
>>710515191
>venomous
>>710515191
>for cuddles.
They have sharp spurs on their hind legs-the males being venomous. Enjoy your cuddles.
>>710515553
waiting
>>710515632
>The name Monotremata means “one-holed,”
I feel like this is wrong, because reptiles and birds have only one hole.
>>710515857
Taste like tuna
No, I do not want a nasty-tempered ratduck with venomous feet, thank you.
>>710517464
>semiaquatic
Racist
>>710519182
I will strive to do better.
Post some smug platypus
>>710519374
They're all smug though.
daily You should want one of these.
>>710519405
They really are.
>>710515191
That's how you kill out a species. Look at the slow loris, for example. Besides, platipi do horrible in captivity.
>>710519068
There are more tigers in Texas than in the wild. If we could find a way to do this for platypuses we could protect them.
I don't want one.
I won't want one tomorrow.
I don't need a special snowflake pet to bring joy to my life.
I don't think they are smug, cute, or especially interesting.
They are simply just another weird ass creature, from a country that specializes in weird ass creatures.
The fact you fags circle jerk over these things speaks volumes, get a fucking life retards.
>>710519481
Quokkas are actually suited for this. Maybe if the breeding program for them works out, aus will get less tight-fisted about thrir wildlife.
>>710515912
>A special plaitupussery
A concrete walled tank.
>>710519498
You make me sad. Check out what I just got in the mail.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XZPwqMx3b9o this vid needs more love
>>710519577
Every day.
Every day.
>>710519462
>slow loris
>making shit up
nice one faggot
>>710515337
>4chan
>implying anyone here has a wife or kids
>>710519540
you are going to need more than that
>>710519661
I have a wife, we both want kids and a platypus. We're just not silly enough to get a male platty.
I want to own a platypus, then find it dead in few years because I couldn't take care of it, then I reflect how it had a short and cruel life, just like me!
>>710519661
Oh there's people on 4chan with wife & kids. They just aren't in this stupid thread.
>>710519228
I'm saving it for the next thread.
bamp every day
>finally want one
>google it
>they are venomous things on the legs
Fuck your platypus OP, they are fucking creepy monsters.
>>710519798
Ew what the fuck
>>710516396
>slothypus
ur mum tbqhwy
>>710519857
It's just mud. He was rescued from a storm drain.
>>710519834
We've been over this only the males have spurs. The females are safe and more sociable, but not in the creepy dolphin way.
Daily Platypost.
Can u eat platapus egg or is piosonous.?
>>710516358
>/mlp/
>>710520967
aww
>>710515425
<here's mine- I shaved its ass and taught it to walk backwards
and here he is in his Halloween costume
