Need some good pranks to fuck up my roomates
Mostly harmful, but also ninja as fuck please
It's also fine to cause medical problems
Help me /b/ pls
Bump pumb
>>710511147
Tell them you're happy and then surprise them by killing yourself.
>>710511351
I'd rather see them dead tho...
>>710511147
Murder them
>>710511351
This
Landmine under the sofa cushion
Pepper spray their contact lenses
>>710511466
10/10 prank
>>710511147
Crush up some xanax bart and put them in their food before work or something
>>710511419
You won't know until you try it.
>>710511466
this
>>710511466
I do like that anon
Where can I get one tho?
>>710511147
Ask if they wanna see a dead body. Then stab one of your roommates to death
cum on their face while they sleep
gg
poop in a tube sock then slap them with it
rub a magnet against their most used devise
Take the sim card out of their phone and fuck up the delicate bits with a sharp object. Put it back. Repeat this when they get a new one. Forever.
Crush up oleander leaves and put it in their food, or boil the leaves and pour the water in their drinks. Make ricin from castor beans and put it in their food, it takes only a pin prick of ricin to kill someone.
No weapon, no motive, no evidence, no crime :)
When your room mate is sleeping, brick up their door with cinder blocks
>>710511147
Razor blade in soap bar;petrol in light bulb,mix laxative in with the butter or milk or whatever they use most off,cut key threads on their clothes so they unravel withing days or a week or too
>>710511755
Right here bud
https://www.buymilsurp.com/ordnance-grenades-munitions-landmines-c-3075_3181_3184.html
>>710511553
This
>>710511147
>Wait until they're asleep.
>Rape them.
Be sure to yell out, "it's just a prank" otherwise you might get in trouble.
>>710511147
Punch him in the dick while he's sleeping.
>>710512216
Im sure coroner would do a toxicology report
>>710511147
put a mattress in their bathtub. usually takes a crane to get it out.
>>710511147
tell them to search on youtube: real pranks
>>710512533
Why would it take a crane?
>>710511147
>Mostly harmful
Did you mean "Mostly harmless?"
>>710512365
>https://www.buymilsurp.com/ordnance-grenades-munitions-landmines-c-3075_3181_3184.html
>INFO ONLY, NOT FOR SALE
just use a good old shotgun shell trap
Get on TOR and find the page that makes the anarchist cookbook look like the baby's first edgy essay that it is. It's a pretty legit writing on how to get away with murder and fucking shit up in society in general. It's on a black page with white writing, good read.
Use denatured alcohol to absorb poison ivy. Spray bottle their car door until scratches death
surprise butt secks them
>>710512502
Ricin itself is fairly hard to detect in the bloodstream, iirc.
However, the cops would probably be curious as to why your roommate dropped dead a couple of days after a security camera saw you buy castor beans from Wal-mart.
>>710512502
and all he would see was death from cardiac arrest.
>>710512688
Explain how to do that
Suck their cocks while they're asleep and take pictures. Post pics on Internet so everyone will think your roommates are gay.
>>710512615
Tor isn't necessary, you can find it on many sites with google
Put some crack in their food, and make them addicts
>>710512585
you ever tried to lift a soaked mattress? trust me it takes a crane
>>710512614
This one is though http://www.gunbroker.com/item/595753340
>>710511147
Release three pigs into your roommates room. Number them 1,2, and 4. Watch the search for 3.
Put about 6 ounces of ethylene glycol in a soup or some sort of food, it's sweet and they won't notice it. It's delayed, and in about 24 hours they'll be having massive diarrhea. Make sure each person gets at least 6 ounces, otherwise it may not work.
>>710511147
Steal their credit cards and treat yourself.
>>710512715
lol, grow a beard, wear a beanie and a hoodie, pay with cash or stolen credit card.. "officer that is clearly not me in that surveillance footage" ..case closed, winz.
>>710512220
nice. but it'd be even better if after you sealed him in, you broke off the gas line to the stove, turned the ac fan on and filled the house with co2.
now that'd be a good prank!
>>710513006
I'm sure cutting it up into smaller pieces is a lot cheaper that cutting a huge hole in your roof and renting a crane.
cum on their face when theyre sleeping take pictures
>>710511553
that's not a prank. it's seriously dangerous. they could kill themselves and or someone else in a car crash driving to work.
>>710513107
you mean CO, good old carbon monoxide
>>710512604
no, "harmful" was intended...
>>710513180
yes it would be cheaper,but funner? no way!
>>710513053
>security camera/neighbor/landlord sees you leave your dorm/apartment in your disguise
and/or
>roomate's friends say they think you didn't really like him
and/or
>his parents raise a huge stink and since you're the only probably suspect it gets pinned on you
It's not a bad plan, but there's tons of ways to get fucked. There are no perfect crimes.
>>710513193
even better
op, do it
>>710512533
Put a crane in the bathtub. Usually takes a mattress to get it out.
>>710512753
>get denatured alcohol/everclear/rubbing alcohol
>gather a lot of poison ivy and make a potent tincture
>siphon into a spray bottle
what are you, fucking retarded?
Put a crane in the pool. It takes a mattress to get it out.
>>710512798
google, because the first they won't check is anon's search history, right.
nigga if u suspect in any case, the first thing the man will do is subpoena your wireless provider for call and text history and your isp for Internet history.
"we see that anon searched "how to make ricin" on google, then called Walmart the day of surveillance video placing anon at location purchasing castor beans, 48 hours prior to roommate's death along a text to roomie saying "die faggot".
>>710512869
that's not really how crack works bud
>>710513363
How would it be funnier? Pretty sure the victim would always think to cut up the mattress to remove it rather than cutting a hole in their roof and renting a crane.
>>710512533
label three pigs 1, 2, and 4. put them in their mattress. usually takes a bathtub to get it out.
>>710513534
put a mattress on a crane. it takes a pool to get it out
Fuck their moms.
>>710513518
Yeah,just needed my desu to take me step by step,cheers
>>710513597
meth would work tho
>>710513643
running a crane would be more fun than cutting up a mattress
>>710511882
Do this
>>710511351
Got a good chuckle out of this, thanks anon
>>710512615
on tor. whats next? not op.
>>710513831
I guess you middle school has half-day fridays.
Make them a MDMA burger. Or 5-MAPB. Or you could use meth too if you want.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CTosyBXc674
>>710513995
well you figured me out good job anon
>>710511147
spray scotchguard on all their towels
>>710514037
Sorry I haven't yet wasted my life on an anime picture forum.
Ghost pepper hot sauce. I did it to my roommate. Placed it in his chips, fruit pebbles, on the rim of his Dr Pepper, and laced his gun with it. He said he thought he was going insane after he had it in his cereal. Said the soda was the worst though. Also, pooping in things that are not toilets. My favorite is a tissue box and then place the tissues back in. You are carrying a prank in you right now
>>710514037
well put anon! some people right?
>>710514037
That's not the story at all you fucking fag leave
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>>710513958
buckle seatbelt, enjoy information in the slow lane on the superhighway.
Put mayonnaise in their shoes
>>710512533
If matt damon cross dressed he'd be matt-dress damon
>>710513193
Its just a prank bro
>>710511882
this
>>710511524
this
Superglue their toes or fingers together while they sleep
>>710514037
uh oh
>>710511936
while they sleep
>>710514255
was hoping for a link or name of the page.
>>710514257
You motherfucker. I'm killing myself.
>>710514216
Fuck off newfag
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Really the best prank is to secretly drug them with some sort of psychedelic.
>>710514379
3fyb44wdhnd2ghhl.onion
>>710512533
crane on the mattress ?
>>710514430
LOL
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>>710514216
fuck off nigger I was there.
http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/usually-takes-a-crane
>>710511351
Top kek
scoop peanut butter out of peanut butter jar
shit in the bottom of the jar
cover with peanut butter
replace peanut butter jar
remember not to use the peanut butter yourself
>>710512585
>newfag detected
>>710514037
Ouch, you're not supposed to explain shit dude.
Fucking christ. You tell them to 'lurk moar' call them a faggot and move on. How do you not know this procedure?
>>710512533
Hello oldfriend.
>>710514261
yeah that will hold up in cort, stupid ass
>>710513193
Kys nigger
>>710514191
>you are carrying a pack in you right now
Classic.
>>710512798
LInks? .onions?
>>710513408
Oh really? B) what about the crimes you've never heard of anon? Because they were perfect. Governments get away with perfect crimes on the reg lol
>>710514379
>>710514478
I don't know and I don't know if that link is legit, I haven't been on TOR in like 5 years. Search bing for a tor links page.
Put a egg or two between the mattress and boxspring, the egg will eventually be crushed if not crush it yourself. The egg will begin to rot and the room will be filled with rotten egg smell.
>>710514478
>3fyb44wdhnd2ghhl.onion
im gonna do it.
>>710511351
Top fucking kek.
>>710514589
>cort
>stupid ass
>>710513736
This. Reddit sent me here to say. This.
>>710514626
you think drugging someone with something that fucks you up so bad while you it causes the delusion think you're sober is a good idea?
>>710513021
One of my old roommates tried that, but instead of pigs he shot up the school.
LSD. You can put it anywhere. It's always effective. Also a handful of fire-ant-hill works well. Also doesn't really matter where applied.
>>710512585
fuck off newfag
>>710513193
Why are you even here?
>>710514517
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>>710514037
Shove that dick so far down this fags throat, poll take a crane to get it out
>>710514739
Enjoy your party van, anon.
>>710511815
Cliche at this point.
>>710514739
nuh uh...do it faggot :)
Download a bunch of CP on their lap computers
>>710514135
You will
>>710514352
Sauce? Those scared/shocked eyes went straight to my cock
>>710512502
90% of the time they don't gaf.
>>710514900
Reddit most likely. Theres atleast one of em in every thread
>>710514823
Youre influence and evil know no bounds, anon.
>3fyb44wdhnd2ghhl.onion
uh is this a legal site i'm scared
>>710511147
bleach on the coffee maker
>>710511147
I used to spit in the air and catch it and put it back in my mouth, I got my sister to puke once when I swallowed it. You could do something similar by setting a car bomb in your room mates car. He'll never see it coming.
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>>710515055
sure....it's legal, m8.....
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buy one of those hand buzzer things and shake their hand
>>710511351
This
>>710514589
It's actually the best legal defence next to.
It was just banter
>>710512533
Jesus Christ, the replies to this alone show how many newfags are in here.
>>710515224
La Cosa Nu'phag in the house bitch!
>>710515006
Ah, that makes sense.
>>710514942
i did. its dead.
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A friend of mine had nair but on his face while he was sleeping. The guy thought it wouldn't just remove all his facial hair when he woke up not knowing it would give him chemical burns cause it wasn't removed. He recovered 100% with no scarring fro. The burns but it took him like 7 years before he started to grow facial hair again.
>>710515224
right, and all these gags raging because I told the original story instead of hurrdurr lurk moar.. like it makes a difference anymore, this site has been fucked for years.
>>710511147
I've heard a prank about putting Stale bread in the shower while he's gone then the Cat died or something.
>>710514579
The last few weeks have been atrocious. This is how the site dies fellas.
Oh here's a funny one. Go buy some wax strips for hair removal. When they're sleeping take one and out it on only one eye brow and leave it. When they wake they have to remove it themselves and then after they have to decide if they want to walk around with one eye brow or remove the other themself. Eye brow ultimatum
>>710515370
nothing to see here
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>>710511936
This.
newfags can't triforce
>>710513193
you ever read the top of the board
"The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact."
>>710515653
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Figure out where you can get a tape worm, if that's even possible, and out it on him while he sleeps and let the worm do the rest.
>>710513800
dDon't you have to take meth for like 21 days and on the 21st you're addicted?
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Put icy hot on and under his eye lids while he sleeps.
>>710515843
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>>710513193
have you even taken Xanax before? he's just going to black out not go full retard. confirmed from someone who took way too much Xanax and then drove
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go sightseeing at a volcano and kick them into it
Sneak drugs into his system, like put some pot into his food or blow second hand smoke at him while he sleeps and then call his work place and give an anonymous tip to his super that he needs to be drug tested.
>>710515843
get out now
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>>710511936
ahh the hot karl, a classic!
Take some broken glas and grind it into super fine dust and put it in his food
>>710515930
>black out
>not go full retard
pick one
also
>took way too much xanax
>drove
that's going full retard.
>>710511524
Oh wow this is evil...do this one
Fiberglass insulation in the bed sheets
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>>710516526
> not writing broken glass in the bedsheets
>>710514191
Oh the pepper sauce is genius. Idea, get a syringe and take the ghost pepper juice and inject small amounts into his condoms. On different sides it could go on him or into her. Or just poke small holes in all his condoms, either one is great.
>>710516686
You just have to turn it inside out and just dip it in there. gotteM
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>>710514957
this. if you ever get access to their laptops, do it.
the lolz will be eternal
>>710516808
It has to look sealed so it's used unsuspectingly.
>>710516817
This
>>710516211
This isn't alcohol, it's very possible to only black out and not be fucked up.
>>710516686
Yes. Holes in his condoms.
>>710517000
Trips says it
>>710517000
Trips says you have to OP. It's been foretold before Jesus woke from the dead. ruin that niggas life.
>>710516877
True. Maybe mix some in the lube as well. Put it in female tampons
>>710511351
this
>>710513597
You can eat crack and get high you dumbfuck
convince them you're not racist then join the kkk
>>710511147
Sneak pop rocks into their buttholes while they're having dinner or sleeping
>>710516931
boy you don't know shit about benzos
>>710518112
it's a dumb drug to use orally you jerk
>>710511147
1. blow up balloon
2. cover with whipped cream and icing to look like cake.
3. give knife
4. tell you forgot your drink and to start slicing
5. enjoy cleaning up the mess
>>710519316
watch your language son
>>710511147
>Get a vase and a bunch of ash
>Walk around the hall hoping for you to meet your roommate there
>"accidentally" bump into them
This prank is so hilarious when you get to see your roommate get covered in ashes. It's even better if the ashes were your own father's. It's gonna fuck up your roommate for at least a week.
>ITT
>people confusing pranks with "how can I almost kill somebody and get away with it"
Stay classy you bunch of mental fucklords... Stop watching YouTube and go learn what actual pranking is.
>>710511351
>>710520074
>Literally getting confused about this whole thread and not realising the humour is tongue in cheek.
>>710520783
>jokes on them i was only pretending to be retarded!
K.
>>710519316
olla puta sexo oral
