When's the last time you had sex?
>>709030044
Just now - your mom has sum dat sweet a$$
yesterday with my gf
>>709030044
It's been a little over two years tbh. My dick barely even works anymore.
Too long ago, I'd say four years
4 years.
Is it possible to regain the mantle of wizardry?
>>709030044
Never. I'm nearing my wizard powers one day at a time.
>>709030560
If anyone can do it, we can.
Never
Maybe a week ago, two weeks at the most
Wednesday
June
I've had the option to fuck exs and fwb type gals but I've lost that drive
I fucking hate my last ex, she ruined my shit
>>709030699
I feel you anon
theres is a thread about this >>709027992
what is this, some kind of reserach going on masked as a thread?
>>709030044
yesterday, she is at her bf's house now
fucken a while ago actually but I've slept with quite a few girls in the past
i never had sex with a girl nor i love one.
Yesterday
Got my first footjob
Around 10 years ago, I don't remember exactly. On my way to wizard status, AMA
>>709031114
>Research
>On /b/
Many months. Im married btw.
3 weeks. But I see my gf again in 4 days!!! WOOOOOOOO
>>709030044
back in june, with a japanese prostitute.
3 hours ago.
>>709031261
That's almost sadder than my 5ish years. I would ditch that.
friday with my gf, it wasn't that good and we had to make it quick, we both could't cum so it was kinda pointless but hey, it's sex i guess. (we had a flight to catch on)
Exactly a month ago today.
July I believe. Fucked my ex and busted inside of her, then sent her packing.
Like two months ago and some change. Been having a dry spell lately. Feelsbadman
21 hours ago.
>>709030044
4 years... help me
>>709030044
I think it was back in '09
>>709030044
2 years, am I fucked ?
I had sex with myself 2 hours ago.
>>709030044
2013 my nigga. The crazy that comes with the sex just isn't worth it right now. Been married twice. Lasted 10 years altogether. Not jaded but every time i put my dick in a bitch she wants to have my kid and get married. Fuck that!
>>709030485
holy shit are you me
Wait, no, it's been over three years. Nevermind.
>>709030044
less than 12 hours ago. first time in 2 months though.
>>709030699
Check this truth...
Same here.
Like 3 hours ago and 8 hours before that I got a footjob and 4 hours before that I had sex
4 years ago... It's been a looooong time
>>709031651
nope 08
almost going on a decade
>>709030044
yesterday. kek
>>709030044
over a month ago, but I'm getting laid again on 4 November so it's all good
Sex? What is that? Can i eat it?
>>709030044
last weekend
her roommate walked in on us. it was awkward
few hours ago, gf and shit
8 years ago
>>709031252
You can't be a wizard if you have had sex.
Also, my last time was let me see... never.
>>709031534
10/10 post and pic
>>709030196
Same
>>709030044
This morning quick fuck. Yesterday throat fuck, ropes, anal.
I fucking love bdsm.
>>709030044
11 hours ago
>>709030044
2 weeks ago, with a green eyed Columbian escort.
Bout a month ago
>>709030044
3 weeks ago found the cure to jungle fever
Fucked a hooker wednesday
>>709030044
almost a year now, feelsbad.jpg
need to get back in the game
>>709031260
it could happen if you are smart enough, but i doubt that. since the selling of 4chan, things get a little weird for my taste, despite the fact that we have shit posts over and over again. Theres something weird on 4chan, like a profile-maker or some kind of obscure search to indentify users.
>>709030044
June 2012 I think.
2 years ago ... thinking about to fuck a hooker. Is it worth it guys?
>>709030044
Last Saturday :/
It's my birthday, I hope I get some birthday sex.
>married
>can't remember when I last had sex
>FML
About a month ago but will have sex next weekend though
>>709033131
WHAT
fuck man thats bad.. gotta spice things up with the wife
>>709030044
how long ago was never?
>>709033131
Do you hate each other or just lost sex drive?
>>709030044
last week and my gf is now begging me for muh cock — looks like she miss it really much
>>709030699
>>709033818
Kek
Never.
almost 23
>>709030044
>that perfect 10
2007 here...
>>709033710
various factors tbh
>doggy style hurts
>not very adventurous
>always ends up missionary
>I get nice depth from that so not a loss
>have had issues cumming since the beginning
>was in a car accident 10+ years ago so nose kinda fucked which messes with breathing
TLDR - Even though I want sex fapping just sorts it out quicker
>>709030044
July. long distance relationship. next time will be December.
>>709030044
2 days ago
>>709030194
wow, that's so original my man!
like far out! DUUDE
are you fucing 10 mate? lost your way to xbox live?
>>709034711
Wow you are triggered
>>709030044
Who cares
Where can I find more of this semen demon?
met a 10/10. into all sorts of crazy shit. best sex of my life. 5 times a week for 4 months straight. decide to make her my girlfriend... not had sex since. that was 2 years ago.
>>709030044
last night/this morning
My little side hoe has the best pussy. Always so wet and dripping. im near the point of cumming inside her and not caring about the consequences
>>709030044
This morning. My ex. Again. I fucking hate myself
>>709030044
6 months ago. My girlfriend rarely fucks me anymore.
>>709030044
A month ago. I had a one night stand with a literal 10/10 blond haired blue eyed goddess, and she rode dick like a champion. I have no idea what she saw in me. I'm average af
>>709030044
about 9 hours ago.
>>709035110
hey at least you're getting some
July
>tfw girlfriend dumps me after 5 years and immediately hops on some other dick
>>709035110
...if you hate yourself, RUN THE FUCK AWAY. I'm saying that for your own good anon. It's destructive as hell in the long run.
>>709034833
Damn, just what in the hell happened. Is she cheating on you?
>>709035349
Know that feel bro. Just once.
>tfw it will never, ever ever happen again
>>709030044
Not sure where to post this so i'll leave it here.
how to get laid? Im 22, never had any. above average looking, nothing wrong there. Social skills are alright but mild aspies, though you'd never know if i didnt tell you.
My issue is that i can never seem to walk up and talk to people at clubs or whatever, if i dont know them.
I feel like i'm invisible to everyone if i dont actively seek them out. I lose patience easily and i'm always the first to leave the club of my friends.
I rarely feel the need to connect socially simply because i thrive on my own. but i still feel the need to get things done. Fucking peer pressure man.
help /b/
>>709035566
I know that feel bro, cheers
does over skype count
>>709030560
Wizards don't fuck women. They fuck space-time. Women are beneath the efforts of wizards. Ask Nikola Tesla. No women for him, didn't need 'em. If you want to be a wizard kiddo, time to abandon cunt and go for glory.
Christmas 2014, it was a threesome... and it was lame
>>709030044
Almost a year ago.
>>709035788
It sucks, bro. I didn't know it was a one night stand at the time and was excited as fuck to take her on another date. Then she ghosted on me.
>>709030044
Wednesday, I think.
>>709035864
Just keep putting forth an effort and it'll happen eventually. I'm incredibly average looking and I've had sex with 11 girls.
2 months ago, nothing special since it was with a stranger, also my 1st time. I was a bit nervous that I will cum in like a minute or too, but lasted over an hour and a half. But yeah, nothing special.
>>709030044
On 5th of December of 2014.
Did lick her pussy on 14th of March in 2015 and 12th of September in 2016. Yeah it's sad. Pic related.
>>709036235
the girl on the picture did the same to me. Made me think we were a thing, untill she just did it at the same time with other guys without a shame. Women are evil, she can get away with it because she's so pretty, but she's evil
>>709036728
You licked her two years apart without going all in? What is wrong with you?
2013
>>709036728
the saddest thing is that you know the specific dates and shit
>>709030044
The last time I had sex was in 2003, and I'm ashamed to admit that it wasn't free.
13 years ago and proud of it, fuck bitches
Last Saturday
>>709035864
Most PUA is bullshit but RSDnation seriously helped me out with socializing. Just say whatever is on your mind, if you can't of anything fuck it and move along. Also come over to /fit/ and join us fellow aspie
>>709037387
you, I like you
Just over 4 years.
If oral counts, Wednesday. If it doesn't, last month.
>>709036851
Yep. They are. This girl even told me she wasn't interested in a one night stand and wanted something real before our date. On the date she was affectionate and loving as fuck and it naturally progressed to my apartment. On the drive home, she was still affectionate and loving. Give her a kiss goodbye and she fucking vanishes. I don't understand why she didn't just hook up with some Chad instead of breaking some loser's heart
12 hrs ago
didn't finish though- went for 2 hrs, but had just taken brownies, so felt amazing- but couldn't close.
>>709037945
> I don't understand why she didn't just hook up with some Chad instead of breaking some loser's heart
She litterally said to me she noticed me first because I don't run after her like the rest of the guys did. It says more about their mindset then we could. They crave what they can't get easily. The rest is too easy. They just want to feel loved by as many people as possible
5 years ago.
Wizard. I don't even fuck the women in my head. I tell them to go away because I'm rearranging empty cans.
2 weeks ago.But broke up with my gf last week :'D
>>709038525
:'D
>>709037945
You got off easy. You had sex just ONCE. Try it suddenly after 4 years.
These women aren't evil they are just damaged. Its better to play them at their own game. Also stop being so fucking clingy you barley knew her.
>>709038499
fucking kekd coffee out of my nose
>>709030044
bout 2 weeks ago
she was kinda ugo and couldn't take the smell also kind of an idiot so nothing is lost
13 years ago :(
>>709038499
I love you anon
Thanks for the keks
Never! :D
>>709030044
6months, girlfriend is coming home in 2weeks, she is studying in germany
had a threesome last night tbh senpai
>>709030044
This morning, it was pretty good.
~3 months ago
I feel like a virgin wizard all over again
had sex with my gf like 3 weeks ago. it was awesome
Two months ago but drunk as fuck and don't remember much of it
/bros pls tell me how to become a wizard
>>709030044
About 2 weeks ago with this jewish girl
45 minutes ago. Wife and I let daughter watch cartoons in TV while we had a bath together in bathtub. Start making out, wife starts deep throating me...feels good man... before cumming turn her around start fucking.
Being married has its advantages.
This morning after drinking all night. Really not great. after 2 smokebreaks had to use a lot of imagination to cum. Oh well, had sex i guess
>>709039315
She's probably fucked so many times while over there
>>709030044
Hour ago with my step-sister
>>709039989
still counts ... ?
The only time I've made contact with a vagina is when I was born
>>709037945
happened to me in August. 3rd date. spent all day on the beach. went out to dinner. sex all night and the next morning as well. made her breakfast, drove her to her train back to NYC.. never saw her again. she would have been perfect
i lost interest in dating after that. just a few throw away one night stands here and there to keep the pipes emptied.
>>709040167
not true. my gf and i go to the same school and that's about how often we have sex. it's pretty normal
>>709031261
>>709031453
Sad? Yes. Uncommon? No.
>source: married
>>709030196
same
>>709039940
>be 30+
>still be a virgin
You are now a wizard
last night.
>>709037171
She would write to me in Facebook sometimes once in two months, sometimes once in a half of a year. Yeah the last two times we met, I was confused and she resisted to go on to have full sex act (I guess I should have been more manly and just take her with force, probably that's what she wanted)
about two months.
could've been yesterday, but, truthfully, I'm not bi enough that a bloke's arsehole was appealing enough.
not that desperate yet.
>>709037387
I am just a regular everyday normal guy, there is nothing special about me mothafucka
if you are asking when the last time you had sex was, you should probably just close your web browser and go out and visit the world. its nearly a 1:1 ratio of sluts to chumps. go out and see what is around. You are wasting your life here.
I'm about to pie my wifey in hopefully a few minutes? Idk maybe like 30 to an hour. Will report back with findings!
>>709030044
10min ago
>>709040357
>it's pretty normal
Having sex every 6 months? Mate your getting cheated on, that's not normal at all.
>>709033006
Good luck. Happy birthday.
1993
>>709030044
holy shit who is this? perfect
summer 2006 so more than 10 years ago
>>709041125
lol i'm the one who actually has a gf so I'm the one who would know. You're one of those people who make assumptions about her just because she's a girl or cuz she's in a sorority, but the truth is she's just not a very sexual person. most of her time is spent studying and tutoring people, for your information
8 of august
Hi /b/ros, im 21 and i cum after 10 sek i have sex... how can i boost my stamina with out viagra?
>>709030835
same
>>709041422
>lol i'm the one who actually has a gf
Oh I bet you do champ. I bet.
>>709041422
My gf was like this all through her teens and 20's. Not all women crave sex like teenage boys do.
>>709030044
2002
just around easter this year
>>709030044
48yo virgin reporting in!
>NEVER had sex.
once around 30 and still virgin, you stop obsessing with getting sex.
Just a few days ago with the GF, it's kinda fun but in general I think it's over rated anons.
>>709041628
yup!
>>709041690
exactly. guys think its that way cuz they're lonely virgins probably
>>709030044
since july or so, best sex of my life
Hopefully in my previous life
>>709041579
start jacking off with courser and courser fabrics. No lotion or anything, once you get to jacking off into denim you can basically cum whenever you want.
Tip from a porn star friend, and it worked like magic for me.
>>709030044
Literally 2 minutes ago.
>>709041969
but why tho. Youd have to be either
>super fat
or
>super autistic
to not get with a fat chick by then.
>>709041969
how come you're still alive
[spoiler] double dubs checked [/spoiler]
fuck it, I can give advice, but /b/ is a bunch of retards. You don't want to hear that sex is 1/10 of the time you spend with your partner. And she will be crazy. So its your fucking job to make sure that her "monthly problems" dont manifest into my daily life. Assuming that your GF/Wife isnt ambitious. Women are psychotic. accept that. its your duty to shield the world from them. This is not a request, its a duty. you let them run free and be prepared for world war 3 through 37.
>>709030044
well today is 10/23 so now it be almost NEVER
>>709030044
Shit son, last May.
>>709041608
high five
>>709030044
who the fuck is this girl i have to know, her look is perfect MOAR
>>709030044
either 2009 or 2010 cant remember, around this time of year too.
2 days ago.
>>709042514
welp so now gov will threat me on same level of retards
3 years ago
>>709042165
thanks!
16 days ago
Several years ago
8 hours ago
>>709030044
8 hours ago
January this year, with my ex gf, its so long go:(
>>709030044
August. Early august.
Yesterday morning
>>709037945
girls get off on the attention that losers give them, chad's don't fall for that shit so they USE you for it instead, and use the chad's for the sex
>>709037458
thanks
Went down on this gil that was totaly into me. got my dik about two inches in and then i totaly lost it!!! Drinking that night was a mistake.
Going on a month I'd say. Gf put on weight and "isn't comfortable with her body." so it's back to palmin it
>>709043381
not true at all. my gf has lots of "chads" in the friendzone, meanwhile she's dating me and i give her plenty of attention
>>709030044
who is this?
Every day 3 times a day 5 if I'm on a roll. She's been with since day one won't ever leave me, my dear Left hand.
November of 2013
3 minutes ago
>>709043502
LUL
she's fucking them while getting emotional and financial support from you
"oh chad? we're just friends" does that sound familiar?
>>709043974
>cum
>hey babe, wanna cuddle for a bit?
>nope, gotta browse /b/ *throws towel in her fucking face*
>>709044196
well sure, but is there some reason it can't actually just be true? like what would she say if they WERE just friends? "we're just friends" sooooo?
>>709030044
6,5 years ago, just before college.
>>709030044
2 weeks ago. before that was this summer with my cousin
>>709044196
this is me>>709044436
if you saw my other post it would make more sense
>>709041422
also see
>>709041690
this is why b needs ids
bj 6 months
about 2 hours ago
>>709035864
Theres other places to get laid than clubs. Clubs and bars cater to a very specific type of courtship. If you suck at that, as you say you do, just hit on girls you meet at work or in uni.
As an aside, if at 22 you haven't had sex more or less thrown in your face just through living life as an "above average looking" person you might be far more assburgers than you think.
also 3 hours.
>>709031261
ew divorce her and kys also kill your kids if you have any
A hooker not 1 hour ago.
>>709043974
>>709044290
goodbye sides
>>709032701
woah i dont think you belong here
2 years
>>709030044
September 1. My gf of 7 years broke up with me on the second.
Sad.
lol, yesterday. With a gurl who always had unprotected sex. I've been seeing her for some time now and she's under the impression that she can't get pregnant, so I said: lets put it to the test, I bet if I cum in your pussy every other day this month you'll get inseminated. But if you do get pregnant it's your own fault and you have to deal with it. Then I pushed my dick as deep in her as I could and ejaculated in her. Afterwards I asked her what she liked beter, do be done with sex and have a pussy clean of cum, or be done with sex and have a pussy filled with cum and she said Y the second, filled with cum.
Was splendid.
Pic is us.
Last had sex with a whore about 4 years ago.
Had sex with a Doll 2 days ago and regularly.
Doll > Whore
DS-DollSweet is where I got it.
Best purchase I've ever made.
Not shilling.
>>709045466
Bro. My gf of 7 yrs broke up with me on the 18th of Sept. 3 days after my bday
>>709030044
18th.
shark week :(
she dribbled on my nob yesterday tho
>>709045106
I recommend supermarkets... the produce section. Then book stores. You want a girl on her own and in a public place.
>>709046080
my wife made our wedding happen on the day before my birthday. because i am retarded and easily forget. get a girl who understands you.
Almost 6 years.
Last time was with my Ex-Wife. Maybe I should just hire a hooker? Feel horrible even considering it.
Feel like all my issues have wound themselves into a horrible, knotted mess regarding sex. Wish I could just turn off my desire for sex and love at this stage.
6 years ago
im basically a virgin again
Like very last day of august. In a long-distance thing now
Yesterday, lost my virginity
>>709046710
It's unfortunate cuz she did understand me.. mostly. Either way, I ended up fuckin her like, 2 or 3 days ago
>>709034833
yeah, i'm sure you'd date a girl that wouldn't fuck you for two years straight. fag
>>709045983
lol dude...
8 days ago, with a moldavian escort
>>709030044
Almost 7 years ago. I lost my virginity at 19. I'm well on my way to lapping myself.
it's been a few months, she was gross though so I prefer not to think about it.
broke up with gf at the start of the month.. last got laid sometime around then
had some rough days immediately after, and sometimes have flashbacks, but now the girls in my dreams at night aren't her anymore and i'm moving on. Sometimes if i drink coffee i'll get emotional and miss her or something but otherwise i'm good
starting to work out so that next time i see her i can be with a hotter chick
>>709034711
On Friday with a fat guy. I feel disgusting just thinking about it. I was bored, high as fuck, and lonely.
>>709045106
yeah, no. I don't live in the US.
You dont talk to people just like that, be it in the supermarket or bookstore. You mind your own business. If you strike up a conversation just like that you're definitely gonna be met by a weird look and it's gonna die off pretty quickly.
>>709045983
i'd rather not have sex than to be this far out.
>>709048920
story
>>709030044
Yesterday with my fiancée
>>709030044
Friday, my FWB is also FWB with another girl. It was my birthday, so we hung out until midnight Friday and had a threeway. Still can't believe it.
>>709048920
are you now gonna say raped you?
5 fucking years. I had so much confidence and energy in college it was almost like a different me.
Neva
>>709049123
>>709032873
Find one with some good reviews and go for it. Best sex you can get!
>>709030044
>December last year.
>Meet on the internet.
>We made with a condon, but her period delayed, scared the shit out me. In the end she made the test and wasnt pregnant.
>Never saw her again.
>Last month I asked a hooker, but I canceled fearing STDs.
Last night
>>709043433
I can relate. I don't even mind that she's got more cushion for the pushin', I just want my horny girl back....
4 years ago
>>709049462
you can you possibly do this shit and still retain a sense of dignity?
>>709030044
4 hours ago with my wife. She's pregnant with our second child.
Last month. Prostitute.
>>709049948
What would make you think I had any dignity to begin with? To be honest, Im at a place in life where high class escorts are alot easyer to deal with than actual relationships with girls. I keep girls as friends insted, much less complicated.
Yesterday, before we leave for party wife comes home fresh waxed pussy and asshole.
Kids are playing we send them upstairs as she says she wants to fuck me.
Kids go watch a show, I lay her down taste a bit and do the deed.
Find a good woman, life is good anon.
oh dear god. tfw you realize it's been 6 months.
broke up with my gf of 4 years, fucked a girl a few weeks later, but since then I've only fooled around.
tfw good lookign and charming. tfw girls want to date me but i just needta nut but not scum enough to lead them on
>>709030044
>implying
about 6 months ago now.
I think almost 4 months now
I must fuck
About a few months ago on prom night
>>709030044
last night with a 42 year old milf but it was weird because she keep saying "this is crazy my kids are almost as old as you". so needless to say it was the strangest boner i ever had
>>709048920
tits or gtfo
dont forget time stamp
>>709030044
never
1 000 000 year
about a week ago where I slept with 10 japanese girls in 35 days
obviously some of the girls multiple times
>>709030044
PAST LIFE, WELL OVER 42 YEARS AGO
MAYBE I WAS A RAT, MAYBE I WAS A DOG WHO KNOWS BUT IT WASNT IN THIS LIFE
>>709030194
>wow amazing
fresh take bro!
>>709030044
late july.
Yesterday. My gf never puts out so I fuck my ex pretty regularly.
>>709030044
2 years ago senpai feels bad man
back in may
Yesterday morning. Two loads in her sweet and lovely mouth to celebrate the rising sun.
>>709030044
This morning.
Like 3 days ago. Periods are a bitch.
Yesterday morning
>>709030044
Friday, what about you?
>>709035566
Odds are that she was on that other dick well before she dumped you. Women generally don't leave one guy until they're already with another.
>>709030194
Fukin ownd
Thursday and Friday. the wife is a dead fish though, doesn't move.........
Two days ago...
>Wife and I go bar hopping in bumfuck hick town on vacation
>Many shots and drinks later get driven home by equally drunk relative
>In bedroom can barely get our clothes off we are so hammered
>Bury my face in her pussy for a long while, she's drunkenly moaning
>Come up and start fucking on the floor
>Ask her if she's OK; she mumbles something to the effect of "just fuck me baby"
>Can't cum because too drunk, just railing her; she seems half conscious
>All of a sudden she starts violently pushing me off
>WTF???
>She gets it out that she "has to fucking puke"
>ahthatmakesense.jpg
>She runs down the hall naked holding her mouth; other relatives are staying in various parts of this cabin
>Hear her yakking for a while; try to see how she's doing and am told to go away because she can't move and door is locked
>Now I have to puke; hold it for what seems like forever
>She stumbles back into room; want to jump her again but am now sick
>Throw up myself 2x then pass out
We took a walk the next morning and she remembered little. She did say it must have been good because her hip was sore as hell. We took yesterday to recover and will finish it off tonight.
>>709030699
It's not like it's hard to get some tail as long as you have a job and aren't a dumpster
>>709030044
Yesterday with your mom
>>709032169
Fat fuck
>last month
Top Jej
>tinder date.
>go to movies coz she wanted to watch jungle book?!?!
>she whips out a bottle of vodka
>she chugs half of the bottle. no joke.
>she gets really touchy, people are looking.
>im gettin hard
>she notices boner, starts grabbing my dick
>she puts her hands in and pulls it out, jacks me off
>megahard.webm
>she pulls her top up and i play with her tits
>she gets on my lap
>someone shouts "this is a kids film"
> fairenough.RAW
>we go out the cinema, to the disabled toilet
>she is drunk off her face. she can barely stand
> i pull her pants down, pussy is good.
>start fuckin her
>she starts crying and fall down the side of the toilet
>pick her up and put her bent over the toiler
>still crying
>fuck her more
>good 10 mins
>cum in her
>she asks me if i cum in her
>i said yes
>she drunkily smiles and says thank you
>she then tells me i cant leave her and im hers
>leave her
kse kaw au pän!
jöja
märk2
äöuilomanuik
kakaloike
jajajapopmem
äön piapa
kukalownenöon
>>709057235
Thats so crazy it's almost believable.
>>709030044
like a month ago, its been lonely lately
>6 months ago
Don't even care. I tried to get a hooker a bit back but i couldn't even get into it. I told her to keep the money and i left.
Last time was a couple of months ago to a Amsterdam whore. I was a full-fledged wizard until then.
In about a year, I guess..?
My wife gave up anal yesterday. She's on her period and it's either oral or anal a week every month. Hasn't given up her ass in a long time.
>>709030044
Friday night.