first day at my new job. trips decides what I do. will deliver
>>708520427
find the black guy and call him Toby
Kill yourself faggot and gtfo my /b/
>>708520427
Well, wtf do you work as? Important shit.
Upper decker your employer's bathroom if he has a personal restroom. If not, the general bathroom will do. But you gotta post pics of the turd in tank.
>>708520498
> gtfo my /b/
Drop trow in front of the manager and kiss him/her
>>708520605
That's a great idea tbh fam
shout this
Do your job to the best of your ability.
go walk around making only duck noises and film it
declare your intention of invading poland
masturbate in front of your co workers and post pics of the reactions
>>708520605
>>708520605
>>708520605
fucking this
begin singing the uzbekistan national anthem and refuse to stop
>>708520707
roll
Familiarize yourself with the building layout, where supplies are kept, and where the manuals/templates/material safety data sheets/ plunger, etc. are kept. Ask questions and take lots of notes. Show initiative, and keep an eye out for inefficient systems, not that you should say anything about them right away, but you'll want something to try to improve later so you can build up a list of accomplishments for future promotions or raises.
TAKE A FAT FLOATER IN THE BATHROOM
>>708520605
roll
shit that tank to the fullest
yell niggers as loudly as possible the moment someone trys to talk to you continue until they leave
Whip out your shrimpsicle and marinate it.
Work hard.
Start taking off your clothes, when completely naked fondle your ball sack while grunting and saying "ive always wanted to fuck my mother, I love being a man, I love having a big meaty nut sack"
>>708520427
Impersonate Scotty from Star Trek , design coworkers as members of the Enterprise and refer to them by they grades
Pull your nut sack out of your pants zipper and walk around greeting everyone with hugs.
tie your dick in a knot
Shit in your hand and shake hands with your new boss.
An hero
Poop on ur chefs table
>>708521768
roll
Poop on ur chefs table haha
Be a nice respectable employee
Quit
>>708521768
rolling
>>708520427
Shit in restroom, throw it on the wall, piss everywhere,leave a note >"4chan was here" leave the building, call 911 >"terrorists in the building, bomb nagger down!"
Only nonwhites would do this shit...
>>708521768
this
>>708521973
roll
>>708521309
please this and record it. already visualizing this great moment
Have a nice day :)
>>708520605
roll
If there is a fish tank, flip it over
>>708521973
you can end your life anyway
>>708521973
roll 4 suffering
>>708520427
do job like normal
>>708521768
rolling
>>708521973
rolling
>>708520427
What's your job?
If you have any contact with customers, ask one if they want to suck your dick. If they're all like "What?" ask again.
take off your pants and act like a wild monkey
Grab a female employee pussy
>>708522317
reroll trip power
>>708520427
Shit on the ground and say
"You gotta go when you gotta go."
If you can't force one just squat and say you feel a turd comin
run up to best looking woman in office and backhand her and yell "my granpappy didnt die in nam so a cunt like i could exist"
>>708522384
roll
Be productive, faggot
>>708520605
Roll omfg
>>708522417
rerolling
Run around yelling that you are voting for Hillary because Trump gave you nightmares. Flail your arms like a maniac while doing this.
>>708522384
Rolling this.
work the best you can in order to provide your company a good reputation
>>708522459
reroll
Tell your boss (male or female) that you get nervous around pretty guys/girls depending on their gender
>>708522552
roll
SHOOT UP THE PLACE AND SCREAM ALLAH ACKBAR
>>708520427
quit
>>708520427
Kill your boss then write "/b was here!" in the bosses blood on the walls of his office.
>>708522575
go in the bathroom, stick finger in anus, wait for someone to enter
>>708521973
roll this shit cryzy motherfucker
masturbate in public
if you're using a pc on work, stream cp on it. Else find a way to play on your phone during the break.
>>708522712
sorry, trips now.
>>708522585
Rolling this^^
>>708522742
now?
>>708520427
Pull something sharp on a customer and demand their money
>>708520427
Jizz in condom, throw it onto the face of your boss...why even live?
>>708522775
gdi
Throw up all over yourself every day for a week and pretend it didn't happen. Get X 6,000,000
>>708522776
really nigga
>776
Start a fight
>>708522776
>776
>6
SIXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX!!!!
>>708520427
Kiss your boss on lips
>>708522712
rerolling
>>708522789
pls do it roll
Kill your boss and make it look like a suicide
>>708522894
reroll
roll
buy 100 hamburger for your colleagues
Walk into the bathroom with a cup, fill it with your own urine, sip on it the rest of the day.
>>708522883
reroll
>>708523063
Got em
>>708522776
Upper decker with timestamp sounds good dad
>>708522927
rolly
>>708523110
WTF IS WRONG WITH THIS THREAD!!!
Take a dump on the floor
>>708523110
Fucking kms...
>>708520605
get
>>708523110
>110
kek
nothing
>>708521050
Or, cum on keyboard and post
Stick your finger up a female employees ass
>>708523067
but now
Jerk off in the bathroom and when you get close to cumming calmly walk into your bosses office, climb onto the desk and blow your load all over their face
>>708520427
Do a twitch lifestream while working
>>708520427
Tell the next customer that you won't listen to them and that they're a fucking faggot.
>>708523298
*cough*
>>708523113
rerollio
Call you boss a "nigger lover" in front of other employees
>>708523110
OFF BY ONE
Whip out dick in front of female jump and say pudding
>>708523211
WINRAR!!!!!
>>708523063
>>708523063
DO IT FAGGOT
getting trips .
>>708520427
Ask everybody if he wants to fuck
>>708523390
oh shit, i thought it was doubles decide, reroll anyways
Tell a female coworker you are going to fuck her up the ass.
>>708522712
Rollerino
555?
Shit into your hand and clap
roll
>>708523362
rerolll
>>708523499
cum in the watercooler
Tell everyone at your work that you were raped by your dog when you were younger.
Tell your boss ur a faggot and want him to fuck u
>>708523110
dis
>>708521768
THIS
rolling
>>708523565
rerollo
shit on the floor
>>708523536
Re roll
Shit in a cup and throw it at the most attractive co-workers car as he or she leaves for the day.
>>708523764
fewf
>>708522789
rerll
End every sentence with "nigger hunter" to your boss.
>>708520427
Say YOU=FAGGOT to everyone even your boss
Hit a women at your work.
>>708520427
Call a customer a fucking faggot
>>708523957
Go back to draw threads yellowfag
>>708523998
GOD FUCKING DAMMIT
Shit on yourself
This shits gay I'm done
Have your dick hang out of your fly all day
>>708523957
Yes do it
>>708523998
>998
>8
rerolling
show your dick to your boss
Download cp on work computer
>>708523957
E=MC FAGGOT>>708523901
>>708524092
Roll
Call your boss a fucking faggot
>>708521973
this!
walk up to everyone you see and loudly say "Hi! It's my first day!"
>>708524169
yes do it
>>708523998
OFF BY ONE
Eat your own shit
quit your new job
>>708524221
So close
Tell a female employee that "I plan to ram my cock down your throat, as long as you are okay with it."
Put in a hard day's work and go home with the satisfaction of a job well done.
>>708524221
>222
This tread is fucking cursed
>>708524212
Yep I was also the guy with 776
>>708524256
Reroll for this.
Quit your job
poop in your hand and give it to your boss
Call a customer a fucking faggot
Wear a red hat all day
Steal something.
Go into your bosses office, run out with your pants off yelling rape.
>be you
>go to hardware store
>buy several ropes
>go back to work, carry around the rope
>get asked about all the rope
>say "oh, I'm new. they are just showing me the ropes"
>just stand motionless smiling silently at them until they walk away
trips waste
>>708524256
Not a trip to be had.
tell everyone you're a registrered sex offender
>>708524320
Rolllll
:O
444
>>708520427
fart in front of the boss bonus if your boss is a women. double points if you are a women.
Shit on the floor
>>708524305
Roll agaiiinnnnnn
Wear miss match socks for one hour.
>>708524379
ROLL
>>708524343
trips get got
kidnap a coworker
4444
bring saxophone to work
when asked about it, say your a registered sax offender
>>708524256
Rollin
get em
>>708520427
Quit your job
>>708524482
Roll
cum on your boss' desk
555
>>708524344
rerolling
Poop in your hand and eat it.
Thump, kick, or punch someone's PC.
Quit your job
Tell customers you're a registered sex offender
waste trips
>>708524482
Roll
scream nigger to everyone
>>708524561
Bump
quit your job
>>708521768
roll for this
Stand on head with sharpie in pooper.
Send your boss a picture of your dick
deliver your shit to a customer
Kill someone
>>708524561
Roll
666
show everybody your penis
>>708520427
work your hardest
i dont even want trips
Eat a ham sandwich for lunch for a week.
>>708524319
Reroll
staple your balls to a coworker
Shit yourself in a place where all can see you
>masturbate
>ejakulate
>Eat your cum
ugh
Cut your palm and leave blood all over the walls
tell everyone you see that they are called 'seconds' (time) because they are the second division of the hour on a clock. the first division by 60 gives you minutes. the second division by 60 gives you seconds.
in other words, the word "second" (in relation to time) is the same meaning of it in "first, second, third, etc"
>>708524561
Rolllll
>>708524708
Seems reasonable. Roll.
>>708524710
Roll
fuck the ugliest coworker you have
>>708524695
Like a different ham sandwich or take a bite and put the rest in the company fridge for a week?
Start a fire.
>>708524776
>>708524778
We fucking skipped it
Grab all your female workers by the pussy and even your boss if they are female.
>>708520427
Grab a female employee or customer by the pussy
>>708524736
ROLL
>>708524781
so op?
>>708522417
roll
Smear poop on face and tell everyone your name is turd burglar.
watch this
Eat a whole Thanksgiving dinner everyday until Thanksgiving. Im talking stuffing, cranberries, mash potatoes, whole turkey, pumpkin pie.
get
>>708524561
rollllllll
Grab your boss ass
Do your job well fag
Quit
>>708524888
YESSS I GOT IT
go around to each person and whisper to them that you are really the CEO, and this is 'Undercover Boss'. the point out the hidden cameras (say they are behind mirrors, etc, impossible to see).
>>708524849
Rollerskating
>>708524888
check em bitches'\
Take a moment to stop and smell the flowers, you deserve it.
>>708524888
Trips
>>708524888
Winrar
>>708524841
I know what you're trying to say but OP isn't his own coworker you dumb fuck
Not a roll
Speak in the tone of an african drug lord, saying black is the mast race due to biggest dicks.
Fags
>>708524888
damn that sucks op
now deliver you faggot
>jerk off in someone's drink (hopefully coffee...)
>wait to see who *thanks anon!* for saving their life by adding cream to the coffee so they didn't have to.
>giggle to yourself knowing you creamed in someone's cup.
>somebody may have noticed. *slow clap*
>#peoplehelpingpeople
>>708524888
WINRAR
>>708524856
this during lunch time. so you take up a whole table with all your food containers, including a whole turkey.
>>708524888
WIN RAR
Cum on you hand and shake hands with your boss. Tripz
Put your hand up a female co-workers skirt as she s bending over, then stick one finger in her asshole then pull it out and suck on it.
>>708524778
So close fagggitt
>>708524344
This
>>708524888
>>708524888
Tim to deliver you faggot.
>>708524888
What are these faggots still rolling? Trips was already obtained. Stop rolling.
>>708524221
>>708523110
>>708522776
mfw you are losers
>>708524888
Good job retard now he doesn't have to do anything.
>>708524888
I didnt expect that
>>708525137
No fuckup he rolled for the sex offender thing
put headphones on, but leave them unplugged.
blast music from computer .
pretend to not notice its coming from the speakers and not the headphones.
>>708525185
Are you OP???
>>708525190
Good
>>708525137
The truth.
>>708525221
why are you still rolling trips were already got you fucking idiot
>>708524888
>>708525190
Eat a nigger dick faggot
Waiting for OP delivery.
>>708525305
because something realistic is much more likely to be done. do you think he's going to tell his coworkers he's a sex offender, idiot?
>>708525410
No I don't.
He's going to tell his customers that.
Tellem your a sex offender faggot.
>>708525410
His customers dumbass. Do you even read?
Upper decker in the god damn toilet fuck that other guy.
