what is severe depression like?
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Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
what is severe depression like?
>>706387572
like a mole on your cunt
It's ignorance mixed with fear of knowledge.
>>706387677
no it feels like your soul got an std
>>706387572
waking up each morning and wondering what the point is anymore. Wanting to end things. Growing apart from people. Clinging on to the small things that make you happy.
Im not depressed anymore, but that was the worst time in my life
>>706387572
Image that you live in a world full of black people.
Hi
I've been suffering server depression for about 5 years now and here is what it feels like to me
Nothing is ever fun
Nothing ever sounds fun
I have no motivation to do anything .
I hate people around me but feel lonely without them .
I think that people are always talking about me .
I can't get over the smallest thing .
I feel sick with quilt.
It's the desire for stillness in all parts of your life, and the hatred of it.
>Feels like shit.
>Never motivated to do anthing.
>Tell yourself things will get better, they don't.
>Wanting to isolate yourself.
>>706388265
Pussy.
>>706388265
therapy?
It's wanting to kys after getting dumped and being almost 30 and socially retarded. Pic related
op here, was diagnosed in early teens and i guess i've never really grew out of it, i just wanted to know how it feels to other people
What depression is like in a few short words:
Nothing is fun anymore, you're not interested in anything anymore and being asleep or unconscious is the only state you like to be in because everything else gets you even more down.
>>706388856
I hate sunlight
I fear social situations
I have no hobbies
I have no friends
I feel like a burden to my family and society
I have no interests, just some obsessions like the health of my dog.
It's exactly like being a faggot who fails at everything.
Well for me it's like waking up in an emotional empty shell hating life ditching your friends just too layin in your dark room not really sure what the point of life is. I stopped eating and lost about 30 pounds look pale would come home from school go straight too my room cry then sleep and repeat for about a year
for me is not feeling things, no motivation, no rewards in anything, pretty much doing things because "you have to" and try to find stuff that keeps you awake.
>>706387572
Being hollow. You don't enjoy anything. You can't. You don't want anything. You can't. You don't care. You couldn't if you even tried. But it's fine.
>>706389030
And would go and pill binges for a couple of days at a time
>>706388197
That's severe anxiety, not depression.
>>706387572
I found that the things that used to make me happy no longer do, so I no longer bother.
Life loses its sparkle, nothing is worth getting up for.
People are petty and pointless, life is futile, death is an extreme I wouldn't want to put on my family.
>>706387572
I think Severe Depression is a pretty cool guy. eh kills himsefl and doesn't care of anything...
>>706389270
anon, we'd all be severely depressed if we lived in a world full of black people
Like a bag of sand.
You're stranded in an ocean, swimming to stay alive. You can see the shore, so you start to swim for it. After hours of swimming, you look to the shore, It looks no closer than it did when you first started. You bear down and swim harder, surely you'll reach the shore. After more hours of swimming, you find that you are still no closer than before. Unfortunately you now lack the strength to continue swimming. So you remain there, stationary, treading water. You can still see the shore. After treading water for so long, you feel your body start to give out on you. The shore is still within sight, but you're confident that you will not reach it. Exhausted, you stop treading water and let the waves overtake you.
You can still see the shore.
>>706388664
Thanks cunt !!!!!!! also dubs
http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2013/05/depression-part-two.html
one of the best summaries I've seen.
>>706388265
>>I feel sick with quilt
>>uh... wuts a gramur
jesus fucking christ not only are you an attention whore, you're fucking retarded
>>706390168
Go fist yourself .your mum should have shat you out
>>706388024
I didn't know I was depressed until how perfectly this described me. What do /b/
>>706390344
oooooh, fucking scathing you sir are just the come-back king
>>706390497
Thank you miss , now go suck your dads cock
>>706390457
See Psychologist maybe a Psychiatrist.
you become a ghost of a person waiting till your soul is burned out and you no longer have to exist
You stop feeling everything and become nothing.
>>706390622
good god more clever, well thought out insults that display your intelligence a little too well, sir how DO you do it?
>>706387572
fuck all of these stupid euphemisms like "its like an ocean" or "youre stranded".
I wake up every day and wonder why i am here. I spend most of every day swapping between a mild happy guy to "i wonder if that would cut my wrists" and "if i put my foot down i will hit that other car hard enough and die straight away".
It isnt like anything, everyone feels it differently. I KNOW i am alone. i KNOW i am worthless. I KNOW i have nothing worth being here for. It isnt like anything any text book generation can suggest so cut the bullshit.
I cant stand when people ask what is it like, i really cannot fucking stand people saying stupid shit like "you feel like youre drowning". Everyone feels it differently, when you sit down and listen to us all speak in a group, you understand it is so much more and kind of funny. We all just sit talking and laughing and then a wave goes through the group left to right of watching everyones eyes just relaxing and everyone stops smiling, we just mellow out on the outside but indise my mind will not shut up.
You want to know what it is like, stop watching movies, stop asking for stupid fucking questions and spend some time in a hospital ward like the phc in lincoln lincolnshire. the silence is welcoming
>>706391534
Stop posting photos of yourself
What ever you do, don't stop fighting. Each day is a stuggle and you feel like you can never get ahead of the curve.
I stopped working and now I live in my room and gained 150 pounds in 2 years. Now I struggle to exercise and feel like I'm stuck this way. Too afraid to end my life bc my little brother was sick and passed away 1 year ago and I couldn't make my family suffer again after losing him.
I've dug myself a hole and I can't get out. So keep fighting for your foothold in life every day and never stop and go backwards... Or you'll never get out of your hole.
>>706390168
your*
>>706391902
"fucking hell its so deep and well thought out it loops right back around to being stupid"
are you actually pulling second-grade playground bullshit? "i know you are but what am i" god you're fucking dense
>>706388265
>sick with quilt
>with quilt
> quilt
It's time to an hero subhuman
>>706387572
I think I have depression
I look at that picture and think, if a girl gave me a flower it would brighten my day.
But the feeling would be fleeting
I think my sadness is from loneliness and lack of purpose.
>>706392048
no it's "you are fucking retarded" so it's you're, right?
>>706392161
That's, like, you're opinion, man.
>>706392087
He started it
>>706392292
well done, i wanted to be angry but i just giggle shitted myself
>>706391592
I was gonna say the same thing too. It's different for everyone. I've been in hospitals myself and everyone seems happy. And their stories are a regular kind of sad like everyone else. But the thing I think is the same is you feel like no one understands how you feel. I also feel like even though I'm getting help, my family doesn't care. I guess they do care in a way.... But they don't know how to help..
Me >>706391982
Can tell my experience if anyone cares.
>>706392324
do you... what?
>>706387899
This.
It's like being stoned to death, but the stones are actually candy and you can't eat them because you're buried up to your neck and have the world's largest buttplug in your ass for some reason. Really, it's THAT bad.
>>706390031
Settle down there, post are consider dubs when they end in one.
>>706392777
>777
1's are now dubs.
>>706392777
Ooooookkkkk king of 4chan , who made you the boss .also trips
>>706392903
Lord kek did, he has been blessed with triple digits.
>>706387899
Explain
Well, it's not so easy to explain. I've had depression for most of my life. Some days are better than others obviously. The best way i can describe it is, you're standing in a thick swamp, and there's a little part of you that's fighting so hard to get out and save yourself from drowning. But sometimes that little part is no where to be found, or just gives up, and you give in and allow the swamp to swallow you. Oh and by the way, the drugs they'll prescribe you for it don't do shit except give you a chemical lobotomy.
>>706387572
When you're always aggressive to everyone anywhere, like everyone on /b/ can be.
More like everyone on /b/ can /b/e.
You cant feel joy anymore,nothing is exciting,staying in bed for the rest of the day,taken by sleep etc...
>>706390457
Don't stop taking to friends and family. Tell someone you feel wrong. They will never know unless you say something.
I won't get into it, but i hope you never know. at the same time though, it's probably the greatest thing that can happen to you if you are willing enough to survive it so i hope you do.
Anyway, ive been dealing with it for years now, have a box full of hospital bracelets, i was on lots and lots of pills, and the one thing i will tell you is that no matter what, once you go there, whether you come back out or not. It will never leave you. It will ALWAYS be there.
>>706391982
Sorry to hear you and your family had to go through your lil brother passing away. Life sometimes isnt fair.
Sounds though like you have things somewhat figured out by now, you keep on fighting yourself as well, the road is always gonna be a bit bumpy, but learn to love to fly if only for a moment when you launch in to the air from the previous bump, especially when you pick up the pace. Something something you are in a car in this story,to make sure i sound less retarded.
>>706393254
>how to lose friends and make family think you're a weirdo
Good advice, given by people who felt a little down once and self-diagnosed depression.
>>706390457
Like this faggot.
Depression is not always the same; some people don't feel sad, they just feel unmotivated.
For myself personally, it started off as intense self-loathing. I hated myself so fucking much, every single goddamn day. I wanted to die every day, never got the courage to an hero.
About 10 years later, now it just feels like I'm on hospice. Still want to die, but now I'm on meds and therapy which is keeping me away from an heroing. I've had to get help from family members due to depression & anxiety so right now my entire goal in life is to stop being a burden to them and be self sufficient, then go to work until I die.
I have a job currently and work is almost the only thing I still care about for that reason. On the weekends I don't do jack shit, not even entertainment. Wanting to watch Stranger Things or other series, but instead I played vidya for 12 hours straight yesterday.
So yeah, on hospice pretty much. Won't an hero due to meds, won't go off meds out of fear that it won't be enough to an hero and will be much worse.
When I had deep depression I basically stayed in bed all day, not wanting to see anyone, not wanting to do anything. I stopped going to uni and seeing my friends. I had a constant fear of guilt even though I never had anything to be guilty about. It basically paralyses you from doing anything
>>706387572
Friends aren't enough to help you out of the dark pit, assuming you really have any? What about a gf/bf? Have they made life a bit better for anyone suffering?
>>706392994
Not the same guy, but I do agree. Having been severely depressed for years at a time, this basically defines depression.
It's a state of mind where you do not allow yourself happiness. You make yourself a mind set where all happiness leads to suffering, loss of that happiness. So you see happiness itself as a bad thing. Thus there is "no need" for said happiness, might as well suffer until the bitter end. Another line of thought is thinking yourself to be not worth of happiness. "Bad stuff always happens to me because I'm not worthy of being happy. I am a horrible person and I deserve to wither."
As funny as it is, a depressed person fears normal feelings, the same feelings that would heal him from his depression. Depressed people bash away these thoughts, they think they require something extra to drive away that depression.
Being depressed is actually very selfish in that manner. It's the last defense triggered in the mind to stop yourself from abandoning yourself. But when you finally realize that only by abandoning yourself can you only start a new phase, become something more, an endless world of possibilities open to you. It was there to begin with, you just denied it's existence.
Being depressed is therefore being blinded by emotions.
>>706394507
Bumping
>>706387572
>>706391592
lrn2 understand metaphors
>>706387572
There are different things that are affected.
You just can't do shit physically.
You're unable to experience pleasure from anything.
I'm the same as
>>706393966
For me, depression is felt sensations just as much as it is thoughts and emotions. It's hard to put sensations into words without saying "it's like", but the best example I have is that in high-sadness situations (like weddings, for some reason) I get this intense cold, crystaline sensation in my chest, behind my sternum and a little to the left.
That's just one example. In general it's just feeling uncomfortable sensation-wise. Thoughts and emotions accompany the sensations, not predicate them.
>>706394935
Depression is a psychological condition; it's not something you "allow", unless you are referring to the brain's neural systems as "you".
They fear normal feelings because depression is a kind of dissociation. It's an internal mismanagement of the different parts of the brain, with the Limbic and Reptilian becoming dominant when they don't need to be.
It's selfish in the sense that it's your mind trying to cope with a problem, but malfunctioning. It's selfish insofar as it's attempted self-preservation.
It's being "blinded by emotions" because your brain is out of balance.
>>706395530
But the thing is, that depression is the most easily curable psychological conditions. All you need to do, in the end, is to find a more positive attitude and eventually this condition goes away.
I mean, I was the kind of depressed that I spent a week lying in bed, because if I tried getting up, I would start crying out of panic. I spent three months inside my apartment and my friends brought me food so I wouldn't actually die, because I was too anxious to go outside and feared people that I didn't know. Mostly I just kept muttering how everything was pointless and how everyone was an idiot for not understanding my pain.
Depression as a condition is in the end very much like an open bridge is a condition. You lower that bridge and the condition is no more. You are not your neural system, but you are capable of controlling said neural system by trying to think happy thoughts. It's a slow process, though.
On the other hand, you can just keep eating sugar pills and believe they help: You can try praying to God and no answer to your prayers will come. In the end, the only thing you are doing is subjecting your will to a physical state of brain thinking you are powerless under this temporary effect.
In the end, no one can end that depression but the person themselves. It all comes down to finding the willpower to fight it.
>>706387572
like being numb to the world
>>706397287
Yeah, man, It's like alcoholism. People just need to stop drinking, right?
>>706397371
>Favorite band: Linkin Park
>>706388265
server depression is no joke fam
>wake up
>just want to keep sleeping
>have to be a functional adult so get out of bed
>do things you don't or mildly enjoy
>try to find comfort in anything
>it doesn't work
>do less and less until the sparkle dies
>>706387899
Wtf i hate depressed people now..
>>706397580
Well, yes. It is very much like an addiction. It makes no sense to cling to it, yet you do so until you understand the reasons why you are doing it. Most of the times addiction is caused by depression.
Addiction too, is cured by having the willpower to do so.
>>706397287
"Depression" is 'easily' curable. "clinical depression" is not, hence the classification as "Major Depressive Disorder".
Your "find a more positive attitude" has absolutely nothing to back it up, other than Buzzfeed articles.
You can go ahead and say "Those pills that are clinically prove to act on the neurotransmitters in the brain do nothing", or that therapy like CBT or DBT are just bogus, but doing so just makes you sound like an extremely ignorant redneck.
If you were able to just "will" yourself out of it, you weren't severely depressed.
>>706397959
So apparently you lack the willpower to stop being a retard.
>>706398154
There is something like chronic depression yeah, it's a fauly hormone system. Comes from eitger the brain or thyroids.
But in the vast majority of cases people choose to stay depressed. It's their safezone and love nothing more than finding shit to bitch and moan about. They just lack spine
>>706399116
just stop being this kind of presumptuous cunt and claiming that choosing to stay depressed is the """""vast"""" majority.
Don't pretend that you know something you haven't actually experienced. And no, I'm not depressed, I just have a sense of empathy
>>706394507
>What about a gf/bf? Have they made life a bit better for anyone suffering?
kind of a shitty thing to do if you get into a relationship just to get out of depression. i mean if you give back it's fine but otherwise it's such a one sided relationship.
>>706399116
Again, you have nothing to back up your claims except "5 great ways to fight depression" on Buzzfeed.
If you truly know the "vast majority" you'd either have sources to present or you'd be a psychologist, and you're obviously not. It's armchair speculation.
Assuming you're not trolling (which, at this point, is getting harder to believe), what you had doesn't even sound like depression. Anxiety would make more sense, with "panic" and fearing people.
So in that case, if you actually were depressed with the "everything is pointless", I'd wager that it was a *result* of the seclusion, not the cause.
So no shit it went away when you stopped being secluded.
Here's the point: there are experiences beyond yours. If you know what helps you, that's great, but don't automatically presume it applies to everyone else. Check to see if you aren't an outlier first.
And if you're a "successful" troll, making me write things, letting me work on articulating thoughts succinctly, then yay, goody for you, go have a hot pocket or whatever you do to celebrate.
>>706399619
How is it one-sided? Can it become equal over time if the person gets better?
What's not having clinical depression like?
>>706399771
idk. i'm not in one. part of what keeps me from seeking one would be that i would be kind of leeching off of their emotional support. i couldn't really give anything back, besides sex and cuddles maybe.
>>706399619
I feel the same way.
Which reminds me, I was going to make a post to say, without being condescending:
If you have *severe* depression, see a therapist. Coming from someone who started seeing one at 21 and wishes I would have started at 15, whatever pride or belief or money keep you from doing it won't seem like shit when you're years down the road, wishing you'd started earlier.
>>706388024
THIS
>>706399116
This. Clinical depression is one thing, but most people can just "forget" that they were depressed in the first place. By simply out of choice.
It does not mean though, that a normal depression can't be severe.
>>706398154
I do believe that I was talking about sugar pills and praying in opposition of therapy and actual medication. Some people require therapy and medication, but those are only the tools to provide them the willpower. They are treatment, not the cure.
And hey, sometimes even eating sugar pills or praying can lead to a cure. But the cure itself is to move on and accept that sometimes life sucks.
>>706399437
You make it sound like most people are clinically depressed. The vast majority chooses to be depressed. You can even ask yourself that are you doing more harm when you're complying with everything a depressed man says. Or would you rather help him more by questioning his beliefs? I'm not saying you should go and say "You're wrong about everything" to someone that is depressed, but I'm saying that in a wise manner, you could bring the person about to think about the good things, to reveal his state of depression so he can accept it and move on. I feel empathetic when coming across depressed people too, but letting my empathy guide my actions will most of the times enforce the cycle rather than cure it.
>>706388265
THIS
>>706387572
I have bipolar, it's basically just a week plus of wanting to kill myself occasionally, it also saps all motivation and interest in whatever i was doing .
Makes it impossible to hold a job, go to school, really anything long term.
Started learning code, to try and do freelance work since it has much less obligations.
But the depression stops me from learning it, going into a complete depressive state losing all motivation to do it.
>>706400503
Please for the love of god, make sure that whenever you come across someone who is depressed, you run ten miles away from them... You are one of the biggest reasons people will become clinically depressed. Just saying that people need to have a better attitude when they are depressed does not solve anything. I kinda feel sorrry for your future gf or wife, as im kinda 100% sure they will develop depression from your behaviour. Please read some of the stories in this thread and learn from them, instead of insisting people learn from you. Faggot.
>>706400503
If you can just "forget" that you have depression, then it's not severe depression. Depression is not just "how sad I get", it's "how persistent it is". Checking the fucking DSM-V.
You never mentioned therapy or actual medication.
You're saying that it takes *some* amount of willpower to conquer depression. No. Shit. It takes willpower to do literally anything.
STILL waiting for sources. Or even where you got this knowledge from. Have you studied this field? Is it something about which you regularly read literature (that apparently goes against all the accepted literature)? How many people have you helped out of *severe* depression? Or even interacted with in any manner pertaining to their depression?
I've suffered from varying degrees of depression for 11 years now. I'm 24. Nearly half my fucking life under it. Here's a summary:
On your "good" days, you feel very little. Maybe you do what you can to feel content, or just neutral.
Your bad days consist of keeping your emotions under control. The emotional toll is translated into physical exhaustion, making everything even worse.
If you're a longtime sufferer, you probably have forgotten what joy feels like. Anything that would elicit that feeling just makes you feel close to normal.
Most of your bodily functions have been fucked up because of a feedback loop of bad behavior. You don't sleep well, you don't eat right, you don't exercise enough. Those factors contribute to poor digestion, and even a weakened immune response.
Worst part of the whole thing is no one can, will, or wants to relate. Unless you wake up the next morning, having tried to kill yourself the night before, no one gives a damn outside of half assed platitudes
It's Keanu Reeves
>>706387572
it's absolute apathy about everything peppered with occasional crippling misery
not actually that bad unless you engage with your emotions
>>706400503
What I find funny about people disagreeing with me is that they think I'm trying to deny science behind being depressed. I'm not trying to do so by any means. But I am saying that depression is a cycle that keeps going as long as you allow it to exist.
First you need to recognize your depression. Then you need to seek help. Finding the willpower to do this is the hardest part. Help may come in various ways, but it should be clear that there are no magic pills nor magic incantations to make it go away.
And like I said, it takes time. I'm not saying you just merely decide "Hey, now I feel good and awesome." It's setting yourself slowly into the mind set of normal, "Everything can be either good or bad and it's partly my perception of things that affect these things."
That is not to say that you will never be depressed again. Sometimes we feel good, sometimes we feel bad. But depression gets easier the more you encounter it and come over it.
It's not something out of Buzzfeed, it's something that has been discussed in midst of teachers, prophets, doctors and mystics for centuries.
As Fakir's state "Pain is only a state of mind."
>>706401706
I did mention that this was not the way you should go about it. So why are you accusing me of doing it? All I ever stated was that in the end, it is that easy. It's another thing to bring the person depressed into seeing it.
I'm talking in hypothesis of what depression is when you are talking about me using hypothesis in the means of practice. Of course that doesn't work. I'm not assuming it does, it's you assuming that I am assuming something by talking about entirely different stuff in the region of the same category.
>>706402502
**Outside of giving half-assed platitudes.
The SSRIs and NSRIs they put you on are terrible as well. You go through a period of trial and error, withstanding a month's long torrent of shitty side effects to see if the drug will even work, only to move on and try another one. Once you find one you think kind of works, you stay on it for months. You don't remember what you were like when you were off the drug, and if you stop taking it, your ass gets kicked by withdrawal.
>>706402659
My comment stands, you will make your significant other clinically depressed if this is the way you "help" others. You've got such arrogance. Again read this thread, read what you have said, read what others have said and contrast and compare.
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>>706402659
You never said any of that. Recognizing, taking time. You said, and I quote:
>>All you need to do, in the end, is to find a more positive attitude and eventually this condition goes away.
Let me guess, "in the end" is where all that stuff about therapy and medication, right? Where literally all the treatment happens?
Finding a more positive attitude is a part. Not even a majority part, for *severe* depression.
Hundreds of centuries? How about anything current? Anything, say, after the invention of the MRI?
Your bullshit might (read: *might*) hold up for minor cases of depression. But when examining larger cases of the *same condition*, your theory breaks down, which is why, if you did believe in the science behind depression, because science revises theories to suite facts.
Let me guess, you're of the opinion that PTSD is really just "shell shock" and the soldiers need to buckle the fuck up and stop complaining? Just think positive? Stop focusing on the past and that's all there is to it?
My experience with depression:
Lonely as all hell
No one to talk to
Loss of appetite
Lack of motivation
Constantly feeling hopeless
Wanting to drink to escape the feeling of emptiness
Felt nauseous after most meals
Wanting to an hero but knowing that I can't because it would be selfish
Can any of you relate?
How has getting a dog or cat gone for those of you with depression?
>>706402202
Yet there are people claiming severe depression on the matter of just feeling a little bad. Like teenagers threatening to kill themselves because mommy didn't buy them a new pair of shoes. A guy feeling the worst for being left by his girlfriend. It may come down to this when someone thinks they are "severely depressed". And the longer they force that image to themselves, the more truthful that image becomes.
I'd suggest you'd read anything in the lines from school books to spiritual science written by spiritual leaders and mystics of East. A great start of an author is Anthony de Mello, who's really great at explaining why it's really stupid to be depressed in the first place. Or moreover, explaining how stupid we really are thinking we are smart. How we are all living these illusions, unable to wake up because in truth, we don't want to wake up. It's terrifying to do so.
In the end, everything is as good as we make it be. And we can even choose the illusions we live in, instead of accepting those we've grown into, if we so desire.
>>706403393
Again, you are misunderstanding. It is not my way of helping others, it's my way of perceiving the problem. As for the people in this specific thread, the truth is that I do not care about them. As much as I'd like to care about everyone, I can't do so. It was what got me depressed in the first place, not being able to help everyone.
>>706403670
You are actually talking to someone that's been suffering years of a disorder very much like PTSD. Since I was 14, I've been hallucinating by the terms of seeing, hearing and sometimes feeling non-existing stuff. I'm 26 now. Hence I can not see the fuss about depression, since it can be overcome basically like a fever.
By "in the end" I mean the final conclusion of mind always ends up to this point.
Going through the steps themselves is just mundane, since all treatment won't work on everyone.
>>706397580
Yes. In what world do you live in where the answer to alcoholism is not as easy as ceasing to drink alcohol? People conflate alcohol with all sorts of shit. Sure, it's physically addictive but stop being a pussy and just don't drink.
>>706405261
Well, why don't you stop sucking dicks then? See, not that easy after all.
>>706404769
But in the means of PTSD and disorders like PTSD occurring, depression isn't necessarily what triggers them. People can fall into psychosis by simply abusing drugs or working too much. In my case it was triggered by loneliness and depression, but anything traumatic enough can trigger these types of disorders.
What I noticed about my medication though, was that it only left me thinking in cycles. The cycle was never-ending and ended up leaving me to the point where I couldn't handle things outside the cycle. I ended up feeling like a robot for two years. I dropped the pills and it took me another year to recover, to feel human again. The first time I felt myself actually depressed after a while I cried out of sheer joy of being actually able to feel something.
I was on anti-psychotics though. Olanzapine, Peratsine and the like. You don't ever, ever want to subject yourself to those. They're guaranteed to cause more harm to you than actually help you. Horrible stuff.
>>706404286
Pets are the best. They make you feel a little important and keep you company without spewing out stupid shit. At least you have some meaning in your life when a cat wakes you up to feed him. Pets also show affection to you.
But if you don't care for your pet, I'd imagine you'd end up feeling even more horrible. So it depends completely whether you're able to take care of a pet or not.
My mother got me a kitten just a while ago and I think he's the best thing to happen to me in years. Before I got him, I rarely cleaned my apartment, because I saw no point in doing that. Now I'm cleaning it so that my cat doesn't eat every ball of dust and piece of thrash that lays under the couch.
If you're feeling up for it, I definitely would recommend anyone to get a pet.
Feeling physically weak and absolutely no energy to really do anything. And because of that, you feel like a worthless piece of shit which drags you deeper and deeper down until your mind starts to play tricks on you and you begin convincing yourself that it's just the way things are meant to be and that death doesn't seem so scary after all. Yet, you know it's not true and you continuously fight and struggle to get out of that endless loop of negative thoughts, but no matter what you try you just can't seem to do it.
>>706387572
Like nothing. Void. Drinking from empty bottle day by day.
>>706387572
sad
>>706406781
Also, to add, don't forget the fact that the pet needs training. The kitten I got was meowing the first two days every time he needed to use the bathroom, since he didn't know where he should go. And the stupid shit he still does makes me furious at times, but I guess it teaches me patience as well. And yeah, sometimes he obviously does bad things just to be an asshole.
>>706387572
Ask Sonic!: >>706402872
>>706387572
People who havnt experienced real deoression act like it doesnt exist. Gotta pretend to be hapoy so peoole dont pretend to care.
>>706387572
feels like shit man. iv got depression and anxiety, so always pounding heart feeling sick in the chest, basicaly cant excercise becaus of that coz start to feel my heart and then it gets worse. its just horrible, wouldnt wish this to anyone. plus it feels that it will never go away and there is no way to wipe it
Pretty much like normal depression, but severe.
Sleep a lot, have the worst case of the can't be bothereds. Don't feel like eating, just don't feel much at all.
Pills help.
>>706393966
stranger things is worth your time, bro
>>706387899
Nice wise-sounding yet meaningless quote, faggot.
>>706387572
It's like depression, but more severe.
It's like sitting in a room full of people having fun knowing your dead inside and feel completely alone. Like a kick in the stomach all day long. Like it was all a cruel joke and it's only being done to you
Whenever I'm feeling depressed I work out until I vomit. Just try to an hero with weights and cardio and you'll feel happier due to endolphins and shit and you'll have a rippling physique that will improve your self worth.
tldr If you're motivated enough to kill yourself channel it into weights you sad cunt.
>>706394935
>>706387899
That's not at all what clinical depression is like...
My question has always been why is the little girl w/the green hair handing a flower to Pete Townsend of The Who?
>ITT: edgy faggots attempting to make a poetic description of something they've diagnosed themselves with.
>>706410568
Thats Keanu isn't it?
>>706410408
>channel it into weights you sad cunt.
>motivated
Slight flaw in your plan...
>sad cunt.
>depression
I guess.
>>706410463
Clinical depression, like I stated after that comment, is different. Clinical depression =/= severe depression, those are two different medical terms.
Clinical depression is something you can't pretty much do anything about, it can be mild or severe. On the other hand, severe depression that is not clinical is very much just this.
>>706410851
Listen to me you fucking mongoloid:
Unless you're severely depressed for a grand total of a few days, you meet the criteria for what we would call clinical depression.
Clinical depression is severe depression you fucking spastic, please stop talking.
>>706387572
Feels kinda empty about 99% of the time, other 1% is just meh
>>706389480
For me it's like there are weights attached all over my body, and there's an internal pressure in my skull. Everything seems pointless and terrible, even when things are actually objectively really good. I just want to be done with living. It would be a huge release, but I couldn't do that to my family, whom I have already taken advantage of so much. They have helped me in so many ways to get to the point I am now, even so I still feel like absolute garbage. I couldn't imagine how they would feel if i just ripped the cord, the ultimate betrayal. It's just like my brain is broken or something. I don't know what I'm going to do.
>>706410851
Clinical depression is much like Asperger's Disease or AD/HD & ADD. It's a condition caused by hormones and genetics.
Severe depression is just a measurement of how depressed someone is.
>>706411206
Totally inaccurate. That's just fucking stupid.
poet Jim CarrollPoet's PagePoemsCommentsStatsBiographyShare on FacebookShare on Twitter
Poems by Jim Carroll : 1 / 1
8 Fragments For Kurt Cobain - Poem by Jim Carroll
Autoplay next video
1/
Genius is not a generous thing
In return it charges more interest than any amount of royalties can cover
And it resents fame
With bitter vengeance
Pills and powdres only placate it awhile
Then it puts you in a place where the planet's poles reverse
Where the currents of electricity shift
Your Body becomes a magnet and pulls to it despair and rotten teeth,
Cheese whiz and guns
Whose triggers are shaped tenderly into a false lust
In timeless illusion
2/
The guitar claws kept tightening, I guess on your heart stem.
The loops of feedback and distortion, threaded right thru
Lucifer's wisdom teeth, and never stopped their reverbrating
In your mind
And from the stage
All the faces out front seemed so hungry
With an unbearably wholesome misunderstanding
From where they sat, you seemed so far up there
High and live and diving
And instead you were swamp crawling
Down, deeper
Until you tasted the Earth's own blood
And chatted with the Buzzing-eyed insects that heroin breeds
3/
You should have talked more with the monkey
He's always willing to negotiate
I'm still paying him off...
The greater the money and fame
The slower the Pendulum of fortune swings
Your will could have sped it up...
But you left that in a plane
Because it wouldn't pass customs and immigration
>>706411474
4/
Here's synchronicity for you:
Your music's tape was inside my walkman
When my best friend from summer camp
Called with the news about you
I listened them...
It was all there!
Your music kept cutting deeper and deeper valleys of sound
Less and less light
Until you hit solid rock
The drill bit broke
and the valley became
A thin crevice, impassible in time,
As time itself stopped.
And the walls became cages of brilliant notes
Pressing in...
Pressure
That's how diamonds are made
And that's WHERE it sometimes all collapses
Down in on you
5/
Then I translated your muttered lyrics
And the phrases were curious:
Like "incognito libido"
And "Chalk Skin Bending"
The words kept getting smaller and smaller
Until
Separated from their music
Each letter spilled out into a cartridge
Which fit only in the barrel of a gun
6/
And you shoved the barrel in as far as possible
Because that's where the pain came from
That's where the demons were digging
The world outside was blank
Its every cause was just a continuation
Of another unsolved effect
>>706411507
7/
But Kurt...
Didn't the thought that you would never write another song
Another feverish line or riff
Make you think twice?
That's what I don't understand
Because it's kept me alive, above any wounds
8/
If only you hadn't swallowed yourself into a coma in Roma...
You could have gone to Florence
And looked into the eyes of Bellinni or Rafael's Portraits
Perhaps inside them
You could have found a threshold back to beauty's arms
Where it all began...
No matter that you felt betrayed by her
That is always the cost
As Frank said,
Of a young artist's remorseless passion
Which starts out as a kiss
And follows like a curse
Jim Carroll
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aXap5hZaqZ8
![g1m4gRH[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/Y8JUC1K.jpg "g1m4gRH[1].jpg")
>>706410408
To be fair a lot of depressed people aren't motivated enough to kill themselves. That is actually a large part of the reason why suicide can be a risk of going on an anti-depressant. If the medicine works too well, the person can become over energized, even manic. The issue is that anti-depressants don't make you want to not kill yourself. So you have this person who has pervasive suicidal thoughts, with 3-times the energy and motivation they used to have. Then they finally put their plan into action.
>>706411466
>Severe depression is just a measurement of how depressed someone is.
Implying you can be severely depressed for long periods of time in a healthy fashion, and as such not meet the criteria for an MDD diagnosis.
Also implying you can have clinical depression without experiencing severe depression.
Implying you have any idea what you're talking about
> It's a condition caused by hormones and genetics
Implying that's true, I'll give you a fucking clue you mindless faggot: it's due to a chemical imbalance, your hormone levels might be fine. Why do you think we prescribe SSRI's instead of fucking steroids.
God please, please stop fucking talking it's literally cringeworthy. Honestly, I know it's /b/ and you can be whoever you want to be, but right now you're just being a fucking idiot.
>>706387572
It's a slow spiral of self doubt mixed with 'losing' everything you feel like you had. Your senses dull, your energy drains, and everything is just a grey mush. You're aware that this is far from rational, you know that things aren't as bad as you tell yourself it is. But it doesn't matter that you know this. There's no joy in anything, there's nothing to accomplish, and therefor you do nothing. Its better to just slowly slip down the drain than to care or actually do anything, because you end up at the same situation anyways.
It's not that you long for death, it's that this is completely pointless anyways.
Your entire life is, regardless of mental state, lived through your own brain. All sensory input is decoded by your brain. You can't exactly change what constitutes for your own experienced existence. And this is where you start longing for death, because nothing matters. Your personal goals are no longer goals, because you find no reward in anything.
There is a certain feeling knowing you have the final decision over your life and death. Soothing knowing you have the control over it.
I'll throw some trash away thinking to myself mid throw, if I miss I'll kill myself. I don't give it a time I just know I will. If I make the shot. I guess I feel better.
>>706387572
Been working on a paper about access to physician assisted death for people with mental illness. Stumbled on this last night:
https://www.nytimes.com/books/first/w/wolpert-sadness.html
There's some good passages toward the end from various writers describing depression. My favorite:
In this frame of mind it occurred to me to put the question directly to myself, 'Suppose that all your objects in life were realized; that all the changes in institutions and opinions which you are looking forward to, could be completely effected at this very instant: would this be a great joy and happiness to you?' And an irrepressible self consciousness distinctly answered, 'No!' At this my heart sank within me: the whole foundation on which my life was constructed fell down. All my happiness was to have been found in the continual pursuit of this end. The end had ceased to charm, and how could there ever again be any interest in the means? I seemed to have nothing left to live for. (John Stewart Mill)
When I was severely depressed about a decade ago, I blacked out my curtains, rage quit my job, turned off my phone, and sat in a room with nothing but a mattress and a desk and played WoW for like 18 hours a day. Didn't eat. Barely slept. Had zero contact with the outside world. Lost 40lbs (read: 5'10" and 105lbs is bad). Basically just withered away and didn't care about anything.
Eventually ran out of money, scraped together loose change to buy gas (MFW the gas station attendant said "I don't have to accept this" when I tried to pay a couple bucks with pennies. I cried all the way back to my car). Ended up having to overdraft my bank account to drive to my family. Slow turnaround from that point on.
I'm 30 now and I'm still quite depressed, but managing it. Live in Manhattan with my girlfriend and have a cat. Making decent money. But still depressed and have no reason to be.
>>706410408
i've lifted weights for years and it hasn't done shit for my depression
the fact that i've been able to keep doing it and seen progress with time has possibly kept me from killing myself until now but it doesn't fix the actual depression in every other area of life
>>706392777
nice quads
>>706412343
are you serious?
>>706390457
Medical attention. Pills can get you out of the worst rut, but don't think they'll fix you. They'll fuck you up, but at the moment that can be better than killing yourself.
>depressed for 15 years
>didn't hinder my education in any significant way
>lose gf, sleep issues for years, things doesn't work at all
>finally decide to get medical help
>anti-depressants with sedative effects
>counseling every two weeks
>after a while they added another anti-depressant
A whole lot of effort, focusing on my own self-diminishing thoughts and things like that, coupled with trying to reactivate my life (don't sit around doing nothing, I know it's hard getting anything done, but at this point it's not about succeeding, it's about doing SOMETHING) really helped me. If you're comfortable around hallucinogens, I'd recommend small doses of LSD, maybe twice a year. (it permanently bumped my mood up a few notches every time).
>stopped taking the second anti-depressant when things had turned around quite a bit
>been free from them for 6 months
>a lot more clear in the head
>still depressed and failing my studies
>but at least I'm working at it
>>706412281
I remember that working out would marginally help initially but eventually just made things worse. It devolved into me being alone with my brain while it screamed at me and tore itself to shreds.
>>706412214
nice picture for "mfw" faggot
>>706391592
You're missing the point faggot.
You're actually trying to tell people that their metaphors are bullshit and unrealistic at the same time as you try to express that it's a feeling you can't really describe, because it's a personal struggle. Do you not see your own bullshit here?
Also, you 'knowing' that you're alone, worthless and without purpose is a result of your mental illness. If you do not understand this, you're fucking retarded. You can only experience your life through 'your own eyes'. In reality that means your own brain, dipshit.
There's medication to get you out of the worst shit. For you to not relapse into this thinking you need therapy.
>>706388265
>server depression
tried turning it off then back on again?
>>706412744
fuck you I was sad
>>706412948
kill yourself and gtfo my /b/
Think of it like this.
When you're switched on; happy, you're aware of so much around you, you're stimulated by many things, you seek knowledge, power, fame, fortune, adventure.
When you're depressed, all you want to do is focus on nothing, you want the world around you to become so blurry that it isn't recognizable anymore, just so you can pretend that it doesn't affect you.
For the last three years, after loving music, photography, creating, learning and generally being in-tune with what's going on with the world, all I want to do now is wait for the day to end, in the hope another one comes where I get to be someone.
You wait for disaster to strike so you can become the hero you think you can be, so people can depend on you.
However, you'll always be scared you're not right and fuck it up, and just go back to waiting another day.
You literally rot everything that isn't tangible about you. You come to despise people's happiness, for you think you deserve more. You come to be annoyed and frustraited by acts of kindness, because you think you deserve nothing.
You'll die inside until your body perishes if you can't get out.
I have dysthymia. I only recognized it because I had a sort of panic attack at age 17 and it felt so much more wrong than anything else. I began to search for cure (fun fact: none available) and with failing friendships and a ruined relationship, I hit a new low and botched my studies. Now depressions joined in the fun.
And if everything else would abandon me, they did not. I'm in my forties now, never found help aside hollow advising.
It would have been acceptable. Meh, just not the happy type. Keep going on.
But those healthy types made my life hell because they constantly berated me for it.
And they still do that. I get paid less than my colleagues because of that. I'm called unreliable but I do my work and have not called in sick more often than others. My work is up on par. I used my vacation days when I got sick. Still they say I drag everything down. Well, fuck off. Stop scrutinize everything I do and overlook failures of other people. Don't look at me when the office kitchen is a mess - I don't even use it, you fucks.
No, I won't kill myself for you. You won't go to win that easy. If you feel uncomfortable in my presence - how about fuck off then ?
I might be dead inside but don't mess with my walking corpse.
>>706411849
Clinical depression means you are born with it. The norm of your brain functions as if you were constantly depressed. It may be caused by hormones or it might be written in your gene structure. This is not to say it's caused by constant hormone imbalance, but an imbalance occurred in some point of brain developing, thus creating a chemical imbalance that can be adjusted with medication with an intake amount of severity, or how much there is chemical imbalance in other words.
If something is caused by something, it doesn't always mean that this certain something is always persistent. It can mean that there once was an imbalance of something that caused other things to happen, which has created the condition. In the means of genetics, it is an error in the gene pool.
And sometimes it's the hormone levels causing the depression, fact. For instance, Hypothyroidism is something that may cause anxiety, depression and anger management issues and is very much treated with hormones.
Clinical depression is being actually sick and needing medication for the condition.
Severe depression, or depression in general, is something that can naturally happen to anyone due to whatever reason but can be overcome.
What about this is so hard to understand?
>>706412744
>King me
>>706413247
This is spot on for me personally.
Sure, there's other things too, but everything you brought up is very accurate.
i don't know how severe mine is/was, but
Lack enjoyment in life
Ambitions are dead
Feel empty most of the time
Sometimes sad, though not often, just really numb
Probably mild depression, i dont know
>>706413602
>Clinical depression means you are born with it.
No it fucking doesn't you absolute idiot.
Jesus what the fuck is wrong with you lmao. I'm not gonna read the rest of your shit when you open with something that stupid.
>>706388265
I've been on severe depression for three years and can confirm this as legit.
>>706387572
Ya kinda don't wanna wake up
Well basicly feels like my brain doesn't work as it supposed to be.
>>706403602
Proportional ASCII art?
I've only seen monospaced ones.
>>706413827
Well, not born with it. But it means that at some point of life something like hormonal imbalance, trauma, a disease or anything in those lines happened that caused it and is somewhat present until the persons death, something that permanently imbalances the brain chemistry and therefore requires medication for the person to achieve normal levels of chemistry being produced.
While opposed to being depressed temporarily and not being depended on medication for the rest of your life. Which can often be very severe and last for long periods of time, but will eventually go away.
But whatever man.
>>706387572
It feels like nothing
>>706404182
I can Anon, you're not alone
A never ending struggle to grasp ever eluding slivers of light, in a world of perpetual darkness.
>>706415518
Holy shit anon, you just went full cringe. Never go full cringe.
>>706415728
That's what it feels like to me. To cringe or not to cringe, is not a question I ask myself, because it doesn't matter what anyone thinks.
>>706387572
It saps the joy and enchantment from all of life.
Things taste like shit, zero sexdrive, suicidal tendencies like you could be driving along and decided to take your hands off the steering wheel for a while, not because fuck it yeah!, but just the unending apathy and emptiness you suddenly feel you can't even muster the strength to lift your arms back to the steering wheel to save your life because, after all, this nothingness is your life.
Live? Die? What does it matter? This moment of pure emptiness is an unlife, it will pass, but that moment feels like eternity and so will those following it.
Several clinical depression/despair is the worst kind when linked with manic. You will have those jolts of energy and inspiration and happiness that will flood your body with raputurous sensation, the world is awash with everything and nothing but all possibilities. It is in the moments when you feel that slipping that we tend to be most likely to exercise active suicide rather than passive. For in that moment we know what awaits. It isnt going from colour tv to black and white, it is going from technacolour with a live band to an old shitbox with the contrast set to 0, the sound muted and the antenna replaced with a coathanger then snapped at the base. You get rare glimpses of movement, you know there is something there but you care barely notice it and only when it would be something bright enough to blind normally.
That is severe depression in a sense.
everything i do feels worthless
every time i do something i reflect on it and it makes me sad and anxious
i notice such small things that make a big difference and yet socially i cannot react to them in any way and probably wouldnt know how to
i've lost my way with people and its never coming back
>>706417025
So much this...
>>706387572
Nothing feels good, tired as fuck all the time, no energy to do anything except wallow in your pity.
>>706387899
>>706387572
extreme cowardice tempered by 'not caring' to make the pain dull. a cycle that can spiral on forever
every interaction with another living being is an exercise in worrying about how we think they are judging us for our apathy and cowardice and how we've failed them and ourselves.
every interaction is an exercise in turning off our ability to feel the pain that comes with the above. which in turn enables the above because not caring about anything prevents us from bravery, prevents one from wanting to try, prevents fun things from being fun. Making ourselves numb to pain also makes us numb to pleasure.
that constant cycle changes our thought patterns, automates them even. We consider ourselves irredeemable, we don't want to be healed. We have judged ourselves as deserving our fate as we chose to be this way and even if we aren't suicidal, it may only be because we feel we deserve to suffer more.
>>706394935
Pretty much, I took effexor after being perscribed it but was so petrified that I would no longer be me. I was all I had in this life, as much as my life sucks, will it get worse on these pills? Will it get better but will I be soneone else in exchange?)Will who am I now perish and be replaced completely?
>>706417777
is the current you worth fighting for? sometimes it's better to just fade away into nothingness
>>706391592
I agree w this. It is different for everyone but I think a main symptom is that he depressed point of view seems so true. And tbh I think it IS true. That's what makes it hard to get out of. You can see how full of shit everyone else is and the meaninglessness of it all including and especially yourself.
I don't have a cure or a suggestion really, because you have to handle your case yourself.
For me though accepting that my depressed point of view was true and not an error helped me to somehow relax and then let it go. I stopped being afraid of it.
Good luck OP
>>706390015
This
>>706412755
oh look a piece of shit wearing corn as a hat
>>706389573
Winner
Idk i have chronic. If enough anons ask why, ill explain.
>>706387572
Attention seeking syndrome and being a fucking loser at everything.
>>706391592
>I KNOW
>I KNOW
>I KNOW
all subjective and debatable
>It isnt like anything any text book generation can suggest so cut the bullshit.
stopped reading here because this is not a real thing.
Generations haven't been a thing since before Vietnam.
>Child killers
>Simultaneously hippies
Make up your damn minds.
>>706410713
>everyone on 4chan is 12
Would you like to see the diagnosis from the clinic I spent a week at or something? Why do you even care?
>>706410713
You are literally the only edgy faggot here.
>>706412380
>7~~~~~777
What are you whining about? I can see it.
>tfw when repeating digits are now hidden image pictures
>>706418236
>Attention seeking syndrome
this is about the opposite of most people with heavy depression
why do you even try to talk about a topic when you don't have a clue
To me it's very similar to heaving a headache except that it is literally constant and only gets worse but never better. When you have a headache you are not as productive, if productive at all. Everything pisses you off, enjoyable things are not as enjoyable, in general everything is a bit worse when you have a headache.
Experience a headache for a straight year and you start to question what the point of life is.
>>706412929
>>706418236
>I don't want to see my friends or family because they expect things from me like sociability or action
>I seek attention
lol'd
Thanks for brightening up my last 5 minutes.
>>706417649
>>706387572
There's different kinds of depression. Each one manifests differently. Some are physical (deformities in the brain), some are chemical (lack of or abundance of neurotransmitters), and some are psychological (past experiences shaping our perception of the world)
I suffer from norepinephrine reuptake. It's a genetic condition that was passed down from my mother, which she got from her father.
The best way I could explain it is this: Imagine you have a small demon that follows you around everywhere. This demon is constantly telling you horrible things. It reminds you of every mistake you've ever made and explains with logic and reason why you shouldn't get out of bed today. And you try, desperately, to refute it. But everything it says follows sound logic, and all of its assumptions are true. You wish it were lying, but you can't disprove it. Everything it says must be true. Eventually you give up arguing and just accept that whatever it says must be the truth. Everyone you've spoken to really DOES find you insufferable and they just act cheery when you're around. You really WILL never be of any value to the rest of the world. If you even bothered finding a girlfriend she really WOULD dump you because you're too depressing to be around. Then at some point it becomes easier to just stare at a wall than to try anything, because the moment you THINK about doing something your head starts swarming with all the reminders of your failures. You don't even have to try to know that doing it won't make you happy.
>>706388959
this
>>706387572
go to LGBT tread, thats what depression is. It makes you want a big black cock in your ass, and doing tons of meth. Just to feel "normal"
>>706387572
>>706387572
Practically speaking, it's somthing like pic' related.
>>706387572
That guy looks like a guy from an animation movie. A film about the war between jews-christans and muslims. Anyone has the source?
>>706418236
How do you avoid getting punched in the face every day?
>>706419581
>implying all mental illness is depression
I may have a few loose screws, but they're missing a piece entirely.
i'm on a new medicine
>>706419932
by getting down on my knees
>>706388827
what's that on her arm? abscess from shooting up?
>>706419581
>It makes you want a big black cock in your ass
that's just being gay tbh
>>706389113
This
>>706417980
That is what I wondered. I survived a few of my own attempts on my life as a kid, didnt care about my life or anyone elses when in the forces, yet when it came time for psychologists and psychiatrists, I think I was internally fighting their attempts at treatment as the despair was all I knew and I was petrified that while I may be lifted from despair to depressed, I would lose the manic in exchange. And fuck me I needed the manic even if it were the tiniest of ratios to shit.
Later on I was told that mine was 'reactive' based. Layman's terms, "Contiously shit luck."
Something crap happens, you get sad, you get over it. Unfortunately I had failed to suck Kharma's reptillian knob in the past and was granted a new clusterfuck just before I could recover from the last and things just kept compounding. My friends used to joke that I had to have been Hitler, Stalin and Jew Bankers in a past life as it was would explain my cosmic misadventures.
Years on, I've removed myself from the situations and am far less often depressed. But in saying so, I rarely have excuse nor inspiration for the joys I onced did either. In the end, I basically did to myself what I feared the meds would do anyways.
Also, fyck yeah lucky 7s, and
>The hands off the steering wheel was a few times, usually triggered by one of three songs or suddenly recalling parts of my past that reminded me that I hate myself
>>706419672
what's this from?
>>706391592
This nigga nailed it.
I've had depression since my mid teens and I'm 25 now it also doesn't get any easier watching everyone your age move on with their life and leave you behind
>>706409418
exactly, everyone does this and its fucking annoying
>>706420649
you started late, you'll die early, find comfort in that
>>706419059
>norepinephrine reuptake
what? i don't think that's a condition. explain.
>>706411464
for those who are wondering, this explains it perfectly (at least for me)
>>706387572
Hopelessness, more than anything. It's wishing that things were better, but being crushed with the thought that it never will.
Pretty much a state of total indifference. You're detached from your emotions and can't really comprehend any sort of "feeling" you might have. After abusing drugs for a few years, finding out I'm an addict, and severe withdrawal from all sorts of stuff I kinda feel a bit comfortable in a normal state of depression while "clean". I don't know what's normal. I can't remember if I ever felt "normal".
>>706388664
God I hate people like you
>Pls kys
>>706391592
This, I constantly pray and notice whenever I do something where my life could be in danger, I find myself praying that it ends my life, like driving I constantly pray that someone just wrecks me in a car accident. For me I guess it's being jaded to the highest point you could. I could find a reason to hate anything or a reason to love anything, as long as that anything serves as a distraction for a short time. It's almost like I have stopped actively participating in my life because it just happens so fast that I find the important things I should keep up with are completely washed out. This is why I can find a reason to love or hate anything, it's how I pick out what is important to me and why I have become infatuated with death. It made it so I see death more as just a life event than the most tragic thing a human can go through, I mean a babies birth is the most tragic thing it's gone through and turns out they're gonna find other things relatively worse. I think it has a lot to do with my age. Being 20 now I think I loved with the delusion that when I graduated high school people would eventually start to mature and come into themselves, which was not true at all, college I find to be a sess pool of ideas thus people don't come up with they're own ideas, whether it be in the way they dress, their plans, where they eat. It drives me crazy because if you can't select those simple things yet many believe they have selected a career that will make them infinitely happy, when we all know the reality is different... I think that's why I'm depressed, so many people don't live in reality
>>706388664
i have crippling depression but i'm hard as FUCK. lot's of depressed people are. don't project you stupid cunt.
>>706419932
are you actually asking for help in that?
>>706418774
But it is true.
>>706421715
are you hard right now?
>>706411849
Jesus you Emo faglord just stop now.
>>706422014
sex drive is a bit low right now but i don't give up. i make myself masturbate a few times a week.
It's like being alive and dead at the same time.
>>706413827
Like this
Fuck you, I'll kill myself slowly if I want to. I would do it fast, but fuck it, I don't deserve that.
>>706393729
>self diagnosed
oh lawd
>>706422263
>and wanting both
>>706422200
mm, you like touching your cock?
>>706421957
>But it is true.
it's not true at all and has nothing to do with the condition of depression unless your idea of it is vaguely gleamed from /b/ or something
it's common for the depressed to be feel deeply guilty or ashamed of it and keep it to themselves, and many people struggle with their depression without even knowing it's a condition, they'll grind on through life or seclude or kill themselves, whatever
it doesn't strictly equate to or stem from being a loser either, many successful people have it and have killed themselves because of it
>>706422469
sometimes but at this point it's more just something to do.
>>706422469
this is just sad and pathetic.
>>706422556
tell me more
>>706422609
i like you
>>706422556
Assuming you don't have any difficulties with maintaining an erection or climaxing, if you're truly severely depressed or in significant physical pain, then the act of an orgasm can provide the illusion of self-control.
You can wrest this with your own hands, pun intended, and dictate this on your own terms, pun intended again.
>>706387572
not giving a fuck, because it is too much effort to breath never mind do anything. not being able to read, to play music, to listen to music, to watch TV, to walk, to do anything, and not caring either.
>>706423028
you should just kill yourself, good buddy. this goes for all you lurkers reading this, too. just end it already
>>706422805
i usually decide to start touching my dick to get an erection going. then i'll get some porn going and think to myself "damn this would be nice if i was actually horny". it usually doesn't feel that good to get to the point of orgasm and i have to really focus on getting there. then the orgasm comes and it's underwhelming and i clean myself up.
>>706423188
most people would prefer to live and get better i think
>>706423450
sounds hot, ever think about having someone help you?
>>706423452
listen here, good buddy. it does not get better. if anything, it only gets worse
>>706422510
So in the end it is: No attention "i am sad" Not being automatically successful "i am a loser"
Result: I have depression and everything sucks so i stop using my brain and become a loser and a sucker for attention. Me mememememememememmee. why doesn't people want to listen to me?
I don't want to do anything ever and have no aspirations for anything. How am i not successful automatically.
Depression is a mentally made up reason to not to have to anything and is for for fucking slobs. It is for people who are fucking surprised that they actually are in responsible for their own lives.
Attention seekers and losers.
>>706423663
maybe, but speaking only for myself, i don't want to give up until i die or am actually unable to go on
>>706423820
Brool Cory, Sto.
>>706423564
yeah sometimes i think that would really be the ticket. a girl sucked my dick for like 20 seconds once. groping here and there when we were messing with each other. i had sex once but she didn't really get me up proper before putting the condom on and then from there it was hard to feel anything and it got cut short when the condom bunched up. she didn't even jerk me off after. i got her off too. and a few times on other occasions with some finger blasting. but nobody has ever made me cum. that shits not fair and i feel like i really missed out.
>>706423820
>So in the end it is: No attention "i am sad" Not being automatically successful "i am a loser"
who said this? it is not related to whether you are successful, nor to attention, successful people or those who receive plenty of attention can be depressed too.
>Result: I have depression and everything sucks so i stop using my brain and become a loser and a sucker for attention. Me mememememememememmee. why doesn't people want to listen to me?
it's more that because you have depression, your brain doesn't work right. it alters your perception of yourself and it kills your drive to do anything. we could replicate these effects in anyone, you included, by changing your brain chemistry.
depression has physical symptoms and measurably withers parts of the brain over time. mental illnesses are as real as the physical ones and often have measurable bodily causes anyway.
please read and actually learn what the condition is, unless you're baiting in which case good job i guess.
>>706424060
that's so sad
>>706387572
It's kinda like having the flu everyday. I'm barely able to do anything. Always tired, have no motivation. Hate being around others hate being alone. Getting upset at the smallest thing.
One of the worst things about depression is that everyone tells you it will get better and to cure depression is to do things depression stops.
I want to kill myself but I don't have the motivation and energy to do anything bout it.
