Special Birthday Celeb thread - come and join the fun
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Special Birthday Celeb thread - come and join the fun
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0QQQBLyo8ug
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My waifu
My beautiful mistress is one o-of the greatest w-woman i-in the w-world... I-I know I d-don't deserve s-such a w-wonderful w-woman because I-I'm j-just an ordinary d-dude... When I-I f-first approached h-her I-I expected h-her t-to spit in m-my eye b-but incredibly she a-actually l-listened t-t-to m-me... I-I f-found o-out l-later I-I caught h-her o-on the perfect d-day because she w-was in a desperate estate and w-was l-looking f-for s-some d-dude t-to approach h-her and I-I just h-happened t-to be the l-lucky g-guy on that d-day...
bump
>>706104610
I-I'm st-still laughing t-to this v-very d-day that s-some o-other g-guy c-could have b-been the lucky one t-to grab h-her i-if I-I w-wasn't there that d-day w-with her... I-I'm just an ordinary d-dude w-without fame, wealth or beauty...
>>706104929
Sh-She s-says I-I'm n-not g-good enough f-f-for her f-for she has b-been evaluating m-me these p-past few months... Sh-She s-said i-if I-I d-didn't catch h-her in that m-moment of weakness there is n-no way she would allow m-me t-t-to get anywhere n-near her...
>>706105360
F-For she s-says, "Look at my Bod'!"... She knows she's a-a knockout and c-can p-pretty m-much g-get any d-dude she w-wants... I-I t-told h-her she was r-right and I-I hope she d-doesn't leave m-me l-like a used up rag... She j-just l-laughed and s-said I-I must b-bow d-down and be h-her m-man-servant... I-I thought about it f-for a-a millisecond before agreeing completely b-because, well, l-look at her; she i-is s-so beautiful...
>>706106070
Sh-She s-said, "Tommy is coming over."... I-I asked h-her who is that?... She s-said he's a real m-man who knows h-how to s-satisfy a beautiful woman l-like m-me... She t-told m-me I-I must stay in the l-living room and s-sit o-on the floor while she g-goes into the bedroom w-with him... She c-called h-him o-over and h-he i-is s-supposed t-to arrive any m-minute... I-I d-didn't l-like the idea b-but I-I know she w-w-will punish m-me severely i-if I-I protest s-so I-I humbly agreed s-saying, "As you wish dear."...
>>706106070
Why are you stuttering? Just type normal you fucking pleb.
Stutterfag, you are a piece of work, no doubt.
I have to commend you on you posting of excellent Jessica Alba pics and webms. Good stuff. Hopefully it will prevent your mistress from chopping off your dick.
>>706107004
She then l-laughed and s-said I-I was n-nothing b-but a-a useless s-sissy f-for agreeing and only a beta-vomit w-would w-wilt like that in front o-of a w-woman... She s-said m-my t-tiny 4 and a-a half inches c-could n-never really satisfy h-her: she n-never r-really felt a-a thing... Sh-She then g-got a c-call f-from h-him saying h-he w-was r-right around the block s-so she ordered m-me t-to l-lay on the fl-floor as a-a walking m-mat s-so h-he c-c-could step on m-me as h-he enters the h-house...
>>706108045
so... WTF
I think HD has one of the best faces of all time. I tell my bother this, he says she's dumpy and not much. How is it possible he thinks she's a nugget and I think she's a goddess?
>>706108045
>>706108234
BTW that's my car! even hotter chick.
>>706108286
Flawless
>>706108234
Your brother is crazy, she is gorgeous!
Any Moon fans? (Terminator 4 chick) A bit older, but sexy AF. Also Falling Skies.
G is an ultraqt
>>706108516
>>706107543
When T-Tom en-entered h-he n-never expected m-me t-to be l-laying on the fl-floor b-but Jessica c-consoled h-him saying I-I was h-her useless sm-small d-dicked s-sissy slave s-so he c-can w-walk o-over m-me and t-take h-her t-to the bedroom... He l-laughed and d-did s-so grabbing h-her in h-his a-arms and q-quickly h-had h-his f-fingers in h-her sn-snatch as th-they w-walked t-to the bedroom... She g-giggled and asked h-him i-if h-he w-wanted s-something t-to eat l-later... H-He s-said yes and she o-ordered m-me t-to the k-kitchen t-to make h-him a steak medium rare...
>>706108463
never seen that pic - features are thick on her there. Is she part negress or Puerto Rican? (legit do not know)
>>706108680
SF: You talk about snatch. Have you ever seen a female snatch?
Wiggle wiggle
>>706108703
I have no idea, regardless, she is stunningly beautiful and has one of the best asses around!
>>706109152
Is she tryna do a JoJo pose here?
random #1
>>706108045
>>Bang the DuffButt
>>nick the keys to her Porsche
>>tfw youre life is complete
Random #2
Zev faggots, Zev.
Random #3
Skinny ass Random #4
Fuck you its Olga. #5
ok 4chan shit system, prevent me from posting new hot chick pics. fucking faggot nerd shithead programmers. let the religion chick and all the furryfag shit through, but if i want to post a chick then block me. fucking nigger sys admins. find a fire and jump in it.
fucking nigger gook zionist libtards.
Eat my gas and suck my balls faggot mods. Nice life. Way to put that on your resume - 4chan mod. Insta-ban from any job.
>>706108846
N-No s-sir m-my m-mistress doesn't allow m-me t-to touch h-her any more...
Peace faggots. Out.
except, shit, can't leave this one:
>>706110641
SF: Have you looked up your condition or maybe spoken to a doc?
buymping with more g
>>706110791
M-My m-mistress s-said I-I c-can phone and t-talk t-to h-him b-by using h-her a-asshole... I-I j-just h-have t-to st-stick m-my f-face d-deeply in, fl-flip out m-my wet tongue and sp-speak...
elle
>>706111432
>t-to h-him
I guess I haven't been reading your babble over the last few months.
Are you sure you mean"him"?
FY
>>706111691
I see your Elle and raise you one Kathy.
>>706111707
>>706111432
I-I know I-I'm j-just a-a beta d-dude and h-have n-no right t-to possess a-a w-woman of this class g-good s-sir... Please f-forgive m-me f-for offending y-you...
>>706111778
young marisa miller
>>706112656
I-I c-could w-wish all m-men h-had the opportunity t-to possess a w-woman this beautiful b-but I-I know beautiful c-celeb w-woman are v-very r-rare...
>>706112656
no offense taken SF. None given I'm sure.
no one in the history of 4channel has a right to posses a woman of JA's caliber. That is clear.
What are you sure of at all in this life SF? Anything you would say is certain?
>>706112988
>>706112882
I-I p-pulled a-a genuine Houdini wh-when cr-crawling into h-her heart... P-Pop! I-I was there and n-no m-matter how h-hard she tried she c-couldn't g-get m-me out... I-I know m-many m-men d-dislike m-my m-motives, m-methods and m-manners... And m-many m-more w-want t-to stomp o-on my face f-for f-finding the success I-I had w-with h-her...
>>706113451
She has a twin sister? WTF!!
>>706113261
What part of the world do you live in SF?
>>706113561
>>706113653
kek
>>706113653
FU man. too much booze and too little sleep. Top keks to you
>>706113261
>>706113626
Sh-She w-was s-so f-far o-out o-of m-my cl-class; i-it w-was s-such a long shot; th-there w-was n-nothing t-to l-lose and everything t-t-to gain...
sarah jessica parker
this thread needs more sexy ariana!
>>706114191
alessandra ambriosio
>>706114130
eww their faces look greasy af. more arya stark pls
>>706114394
>>706114327
jessica alba
>>706114592
brooke burke
>>706113958
Out of your class??
this chick is more like your class.
>>706114592
Too much meat on her bones. I like to feel like I'm fucking a dried out rotisserie chicken, not some fucking whale. Gross, dude.
>>706114462
>>706114695
>>706114627
>>706114501
thxxxxx
jamie
>>706115113
Duff Fight! (You will lose)
>>706113958
V-Very o-often m-my m-mistress d-decides t-to p-put m-me t-to sleep at n-night the h-hard w-way... I-I usually w-wake u-up in the m-morning w-with a splitting headache... Sh-She s-sometimes st-stills g-gets v-very upset a-at m-my disregard f-for etiquette and propriety when I-I savagely overtook h-her l-life w-with m-my sn-snake-like advances...
>>706115229
I don't collect. I just started making edits the other day.
>>706115463
well ok then Hi.
>>706115322
She says i-it won't hurt when h-her b-boot o-over m-my sk-skinny beta-throat encapsulates m-my existence and p-presses d-down t-to relieve h-her o-of the l-long d-day's stresses and p-pressures b-but i-it always d-does...
>>706115813
I sincerely hope your b8ing
Have your (you) and run with it kid
>>706110453
I want to cum all over her face.
>>706115813
>>706115985
She a-always brings the fl-flowers to o-our s-sessions because they r-r-remind us o-of both the beauty and prickly p-pain involved...
>>706116281
ok mate you can stop now this erp shit is creepy
>>706116381
>>706116281
I-I am s-so lucky t-to h-have a-a w-world cl-class beautiful c-celeb w-woman... I-I w-w-wish all m-men c-could know what i-it is l-like t-t-to wake up knowing that sh-she i-is yours f-forever...
>>706116550
excellent.
>>706116632
Please stop shitposting and if it's not a shitpost go to a psychologist or some shit
>>706116632
Jessica Alba is not your right hand you mongoloid.
>>706116771
I-I understand y-your fr-frustrations g-good s-sir and I-I hope y-you t-too one day w-will be able t-to find a-a beautiful, famous and r-rich c-celeb w-woman...
>>706116771
i've seen this on a lot of celeb threads...dunno what it is. guess we need to lurk moar
>>706117382
I have been baffled by this stuttering fellow for probably months now.
>>706117321
>>706117276
>>706117463
I-I r-remember wh-when I-I d-didn't have h-her I-I w-was j-just a-a slim-shit d-dog l-like m-many m-men wh-who w-want h-her... My s-suburbs w-were f-full o-of v-vomit and f-fat p-poor w-woman...
>>706117463
imagine this dude is locked up somewhere and the only thing he's allowed to post is suttering riddles for people that have to save him but have to figure out where he's being kept by clues in his stuttering...lmao im fucking high
>>706117722
Does he get off by people berating him? Is that even a thing?
Kill the Stutterfaf! kill kill kill
Death to Stutterfag!!
Someone make a photoshop or something.
>>706118010
is it the same dude on every thread? i mean it has to be, right?
>>706118188
>>706108516
>>706117676
After sl-slinging m-my helpless b-body around w-with s-several b-body s-slams m-my mistress i-is m-more than finished h-her daily w-workout and b-bids m-me w-wash h-her f-feet and prepare h-her bath b-by hand washing the bathtub... I-I m-move quickly t-to obey h-her b-because I-I d-don't w-want h-her t-to get angry a-at m-me...
>>706118356
Word. Christ she is under appreciated.
>>706118459
>>706118418
does she ever take you to Suplex City?
>>706118418
>>706118828
She kn-knows I-I would d-do anything t-to k-keep h-her because she i-is t-too valuable an a-asset f-for m-me t-to lose... I-I t-try m-my b-best t-to please and o-obey h-her...
>>706118828
I'm sure
>>706118876
Sh-She s-says she d-doesn't kn-know why she k-keeps m-me and h-her l-life w-would definitely b-be a m-million t-times b-better i-if I-I w-was fl-flattened b-by a semi while w-walking d-down the s-sidewalk...
>>706118876
Asset? Asset? You call the goddess of your existence an 'asset'? WTF are you CIA? Such disrespect. No wonder she beats you. Dumb ass faggot. You deserve to live in shit you mongrel.
>>706119086
I-I d-don't l-like when sh-she t-talks l-like that b-but I-I j-just st-stay s-silent... This usually m-makes h-her m-more upset: saying i-if I-I was a-a real m-man I-I w-would s-say s-something and w-wouldn't allow myself t-to be verbally trampled b-by a w-woman...
>>706119457
SF: you are ignoring our questions.
>>706119639
>>706119457
>>706119184
I-I know wh-when she i-is heaving m-my b-body ar-around like a sack of potatoes she also s-says I-I d-don't care about h-her enough b-but this b-baffles m-me because I-I f-find h-her very beautiful...
>>706119457
>>706119677
omg dude cmon stop
>>706119677
>>706119826
M-Maybe she thinks I-I d-don't c-care; I-I d-don't know: that w-would explain a-all those b-ball stomping s-sessions I-I m-must endure...
>>706119826
we all know we've been infected with cancer for a long time now.
This is something else..
Best we can hope for is that its an isolated occurrence and not an outbreak of cuckottry.
>>706120128
I-I sincerely h-hope every g-good alpha s-sir h-here f-finds their d-dream g-girl... I-I hopes she c-comes knocking t-to your d-door one d-day w-with a-a big and l-loving smile on h-her f-face... And as she c-comes u-up and embraces y-you w-with tears in h-her eyes she s-says, "I love you."...
>>706120188
must sleep. so late
>>706112882
>>706113261
You're very irritating; a bit like the faggot that pretends to be a psychiatrist.
And if you're going to pretend to stutter do it correctly. No stutterer will stutter on "I" as it's a single syllable that doesn't form the tongue and lips into the shape that stutterers hesitate over
>>706120737
K-k-kill y-yourself f-f-faggot
>>706120811
>>706121234
M-My g-good and n-noble s-sirs I-I know a-a sissy-spade l-like m-me h-has n-no r-right t-to possess a woman o-of this quality and b-beauty b-but pl-please b-be assured m-many m-men w-want t-to tap d-dance on m-my face after a-all the d-devious and immoral tr-tricks I-I played on m-my mistress in captivating a-and capturing h-her p-poor and fragile heart...
>>706120811
>faggot that pretends to be a psychiatrist
Who is that??
>>706121364
I-Indeed I-I crawled o-out o-of the street g-gutter, straight from the s-sewers t-to foul m-myself i-into h-her pristine existence... I-I know she h-holds a g-great slam-hammer grudge at m-me because o-of this... M-Maybe when sh-she g-gets older sh-she w-will f-find it i-in her heart t-to forgive m-me...
>>706121388
lurk moar. You'll come across one of his threads on day, unless the shit he gets heaped on his head has finally worked and he's fucked off permanently to Reddit to get the attention he craves
He usually starts with a pic with "The psychiatrist is in". Goes by a girls name and affects a stutter (the dumb faggot types "p-psychiatrist" without appreciating that the "p" is silent) but is a fat abusive neckbeard, from what I've read
Thread needs moar birthday suits.
>>706121705
I-I h-hope she d-doesn't leave m-me f-for g-good and f-finds i-it in h-her heart t-to pity a-a st-street slime like me...
>>706110213
