Late Night Feels Thread
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Late Night Feels Thread
I turned 24 today. Work has me doing a ten hour shift and my girlfriend hasn't talked to me in a week. Not the best way too start.
>>704114134
where do you live pal
>>704114302
also happy birthday!
>>704114302
South Dakota.
>>704114399
why hasnt your gf talked to you? (sorry if its a dumb question)
>>704114134
Happy birthday dude.
>>704114579
I wish I had a good answer. She has a lot on her plate, and I decided to step back and let her do her.
>>704114707
she's not doing her, Chad thundercock is
>>704114651
Thank you man, it means a lot
>>704114773
I wouldn't be surprised
>>704114707
Check up on her. Are you worried?
>>704114851
well if she's not going to talk to you, forget about her. Bitches are a dime a dozen. Happy Birthday
>>704114880
I am yes, but I choose to not let it get to me.
Just saw this. Hit me right in the feels.
>>704115235
My life summed up in one picture
These threads do leagues of help for me. Thank you guys
>>704115464
Same
>>704114134
I'm sorry you're having a bad day, but in case no one else says it happy birthday!
>girl of my dreams is my bestfriend
>constantly asks me for dating advice
>doesn't know I love her
Today's she claimed that she liked a boy who dm'd her some copypasta and caught her in the feels.
I can't take it anymore /b/. What do I tell her?
My friend overdosed and died today. He was so fucking young i dont want to believe he's gone.
OP here. If anyone has told you that exercise helps with depression they are wrong. A full year of exercise and i still feel awful
>>704115792
I am so sorry to hear that anon. :(
>>704115751
I feel like you have to tell her as casual as possible so it doesnt ruin a friendship. thats what happened with me
>>704115792
Im sorry to hear. My friends have been super close to OD'ing so I cant imagine
>>704113485
>>704113451
:’(
>Going through a divorce right now
>worried about two dogs wife is taking
>Leaving me the third dog and snek
>Cunt always forgets to feed them and let them out
>She doesn't have a home lined up
>Wont let me keep other two
>All 3 dogs are codependent on each other
>Point out splitting the three up and keeping them without a home is cruel
>Refuses to admit she cares more about her emotions than dogs well being
Christ people are self centered
>>704116057
It's hard man. I don't want to ruin our friendship but we have had something more than that going on for a while now, she just doesn't want to date me.
What does it feel like to be loved /b/?
>>704116365
What about your parents man?
>>704116304
Explain. You've already asked her to date you?
>>704116474
I was a mistake. They didn't want me.
Despite doing my best to make my girlfriend happy, she constantly lets her depression beat out any and all motivational moments we have whenever possible. Now doubts the relationship as a whole, and I feel like I've failed as a boyfriend.
>>704116586
For as little as its worth. Know that at least I'm rooting for you man.
>>704116365
A better question is why we seem to think that being loved will solve anything.
>>704116586
You hit me hard on my feels
>>704116869
There are some things that are out of your control man. It's not at all your fault and not hers either. Depression is a horrible thing. Have you two looked into getting professional help? It's not easy, but you two can get through it. Best of luck, friend.
>>704116365
Completeness, that no matter what that person will be there. And that that person trusts you to do the same and is attracted to your entirety scars and all. It's an addiction anon and withdrawal is pure living hell. That's actual love, willingness by both parties to position each other to their weakest portion and having no fear of them destroying you.
Ya'll are a bunch of faggots that need to man the fuck up.
>>704117057
No, we actually have emotions and feelings unlike self centered faggots like you.
>>704117057
The problem is that we tried to man the fuck up, just not everyone is wanted in life. You can only pretend for so long. some people are just not wanted or meant to be happy. Not everyone can be happy, anon.
>>704117057
Come at me faggot. I'll suck your dick.
>>704117057
>emotions are for girls
>>704116518
To some degree yeah. She knows I like her but all she does is use me advice for other boys. I'm like that one nigga everyone knows that gives the best advice and is single, especially when it comes to her.
>>704117187
>wanting to have an outlet for pent up emotions
fuck me right?
>>704116904
It doesn't, you only end up being burned. People are easily bought or deceived, then there are the people who are intentionally cruel.
>>704117132
>>704117140
>>704117155
Guuuys ignore him
>>704117231
I'll fuck you right ;)
>>704116235
I just had to do this, Two dogs I wanted on my 40 acres. My gf hasnt done a fucking thing for them. Never took them out. Would wake me up to put them outside then fought to keep one of them. Court Court, threatened to kill her. I hate that bitch more than anything.
>>704117204
Sounds like you know it's toxic man. You can't be older than high school/college age am I right? You gotta move on from this girl. Take it from a random internet stranger who's gone through a similar thing. Quicker you get it over with, the faster you can move on to healing.
>>704117264
>you only end up being burned
Then what value can we find in life.
If we hate ourselves and interaction with others is ultimately fruitless then why bother?
>>704117301
You know what you must do anon...
>>704117204
>>704117355
honestly that sounds like the best option here anon. it seems to me that she doesnt want to go further, sorry pal
I'm just gonna type something out to get it off my chest.
>Be lonely, gay loser
>First day of sixth grade
>Meet best friend (first friend ever)
>We were both nerds who played RuneScape
>Play with him all the time, start hanging out at each other's houses, best time of my life
>World of Warcraft launches
>Play it every day, started our own guild, made new friends. Times were great.
>During all this I tell myself I don't need to worry about school because I'm just going to kill myself once I turn 18.
>I fail 6th grade, friend doesn't. He tries to talk to me about how important school is and even offers to help me with homework every day on top of doing his own shit.
>Years go by, I still play every day way too fucking much and eventually drop out of school.
>Friend still hangs out with me all the time. I don't know why, I didn't deserve him.
>First person I came out to, he didn't care, just wants me to be successful in life.
>Still tries to get me to go back to school but I'm next level stubborn
He graduated high school with the second highest GPA in his school. He got a full scholarship going to his dream college. He's fucking smart and he'll probably be a millionaire some day. I haven't spoken to him in years. Our last conversation was before he left for college. He asked me one more time to try and fix my life... I told him to fuck off. I haven't regretted anything as much as those last words since and I probably never will.
Fuck I miss my best friend so fucking bad. Oh, and I guess it goes without saying that I didn't end up killing myself. Though it probably would have been better than this.
>>704116365
Learn to love first then be loved. Then you'll find out it's not worth the effort.
>>704117507
To add to this; how can you expect to be loved by someone when you can't accept yourself let alone love yourself.
>>704117132
Yes, because other people including myself don't experience those "emotions and feelings" and learn to accept them, do things to mitigate them, and then move on. Wait...
>>704117140
Was mostly just fucking around with the manning up. But yeah, you can work your way out of depression. It takes actual work, but once you get out, holy shit you can grow so much that you put yourself in a state of mind where you refuse to let it happen to you again, and it doesn't. You can still have shit days, but on those take the second half of the day off work, eat whatever you want, do whatever you want. Fuck it. Then wake up the next day feeling great.
>>704117155
Not if I suck yours first, faggot!
>>704117187
Nah, emotions aren't. But being a bitch almost is by definition alone.
>>704115235
shoulda have replied the post
>>704117507
The problem is when one learns to love, and realizes that it's not returned in kind. Love must be earned, it's not unconditional despite our best hopes.
Love projected outward without reciprocity is a joke. It takes two to love, but often it's only one who expresses any sort of genuine care.
>>704117428
Murder her and drop her in lake superior. I got it.
>>704117802
Based on the picture and what you typed. You are overthinking life. Stop being a faggot.
Also, fucking lol. Love yourself first.
>>704117408
Leaving a positive impact in one way or another on the world, it's depressing but live each day one step at a time and try your damndest to do right. You don't have to let others in to be a good person who's actions make a good impact.
>>704117802
Is there anything wrong with love having to be earned and that it isn't unconditional? Like anything else in life, love is something you constantly build and work upon. Expecting someone to care for you without qualms is unrealistic when one can't even do that for themselves.
>>704117889
Or I dunno find some way to prove that she's mistreating the dogs.
>>704118134
nothing wrong with it, but it sure does suck.
>>704113394
>she said we can still be friends
>she doesn't want to be friends
>>704118495
You trusted a woman, it's your own fault really. All women are bitches
>>704118254
Life sucks and is unfair. I presume you have already realized this.
Step 2 is realizing that by even having the ability to post you have a leg up on a vast majority of people that have had a much shittier hand dealt to them.
You were not born in a trash heap village in India. I'm not going to spew the typical garbage of "You can choose to be happy" because you fucking can't. What you can do, however, is choose to change nearly every circumstance in your life going forward. Changing one or more things may lead to you being happy.
>>704117923
>You are overthinking life
Probably, though that;s the problem m80. Try stopping that once you;ve had a realixation that it all went wrong somewhere along the line.How does one really come back from that?
>>704114134
happy birthday bro
>>704115751
Either tell her and feel the temporary pain of rejection or continue the way you are and feel the pain of a lifetime of regret.
>>704114134
happy birthday man
>>704118952
By realizing that many others in this world have come back from far worse, /b/rother.
>>704114134
happy birthday but seriously stop complaining.
I live in a shithole, trying to find a job for 4 months, risk going homeless if I don't find a job in the next two months, no girlfriend and mother having schizophrenia.
TL;DR - There are people worse than you, maybe it helps.
>>704117019
This
Depression isn't really something you get over on your own, its a sickness, a problem with how her brain functions and she needs a doctor to treat it
>>704118952
Don't think of it as a "comeback"
This ain't a movie. Just change little things today.
>>704119612
Changes are great an all, but we tend to think in outcomes. If we work towards a goal but never achieve it can we really be said to have done anything of merit at all?
>be me
>broken up with GF since this February
>recently start thinking about her a lot
>start to miss her terribly and realize i want her back
>it was her birthday last week
>text her happy birthday, she responds and we talk for a while
>she seems really receptive, no short texts or anything
>ask her if we can talk
>she says yes, i'll call you later
>i thank her
>later that night i get ancy. when t he fuck is she planning on calling me?
>text her, call her a few times. finally she texts back kind of pissed because she had a bunch of homework she had to get done
>apologize, she says she'll call me later
I still haven't heard back from her. I'm holding out hope that she's planning on calling me this weekend when she has time, but i have a bad feeling. I miss her so fucking much and I might have blown my chance to fix things.
>>704117485
dude just get your GED and get in contact with him again, he sounds like a nice guy he'll forgive you
>>704119752
*it was her birthday this week
Kill yourself now. You will always be a failure.
>>704119752
just relax man she wont make a big deal out of it if you don't, just be patient and wait for a bit
>>704119719
Merit, Outcomes, who gives a shit. Do what you want.
You're right changes in life are w/e. Don't really change
anything. But changes in the mind, that's something
Changing standards of success and happiness can go
a long way.
>>704119752
delete the number bro, then go on a tinder spree to forget her, better than sulking and falling in love with the idea of being in love again with this girl.
>>704119752
Why did you break up with her? What were the problems you were having?
>>704119467
> 2016
>still believes in medical science
Goddamn you are a bunch of fags
>>704120117
>changing standards
Why settle for less anon?
It's like telling yourself that you have to lower yourself to a simppler happiness. For some people that just isn't plausible. Immagine me giving you something you detest and telling you to be happy with it becasue it;s all you've got.
Some people live for values and virtues and betraying those and settling for less is the same as never really having had them in the first place. Essentially it poses an identity question or concern of "who am I and what do I want out of life?"
>>704120205
>>704120292
Nice try m80 :^)
>>704113451
:'(
>>704119752
Stop.
Seriously. Stop doing this to yourself.
Were you a virgin before her? Not trying to be a dick, but seriously, is this your first breakup or something? Do you not realize how many fucking countless times this has happened throughout history?
Move. The. Fuck. On.
It doesn't have to be great or feel good. It just has to be.
Desperately want to experience real love and all the things that come with it. Have not even gotten to a point of a first kiss or even holding hands.
Basically broken so I can't talk to anyone about this in person. Terrified of fucking up and ruining a relationship even before one starts and as a result actively avoid social contact even though it's self sabotage. It's not even intentional at this point, I've been straight up diagnosed with serious social phobias. The only time I can really talk with people openly is with anonymity online.
As a result of this I hate myself and have pretty much accepted I'm going to die alone. I have not been truly happy for over 10 years, it's been one failure after another with intermittent coasting and people doing their best to make me feel worthless mixed in. My most common thought for the last several years is somewhere along the lines of "I'm ready to die, there's nothing for me here", I just can't bring myself to do it. Someone willing to love me is the closet thing to a superhero that could exist in this world and could literally save my life, but that person doesn't exist for me anymore.
What makes it all worse is I had a chance back in high school and blew it. Pic very related.
>>704116235
i dont know what country you're in but in mine pets are like children if you can show a court of law that you can better provide for these animals than she is then they're yours by law
>Be me survive afghan with not a single injury
> see fucked up shit every day doesn't effect me
>Come home and i am distant with wife and family
2 years later sit on couch and cry my eyes out because i keep reliving everyday and every situation and wonder why i am alive and my mate is not. Wife has no idea why her husband is crying like a bitch.
Currently going to see someone because i tried to kill myself.
>>704116365
shit mate
>>704118250
Yeah that will work in court you fucking jew sympathizer. Oy vey my wife is brutalizing these dawgs. Go cuck yourself into 2020 you nigger faggot.
>>704120478
I actually was moving on, but she kept contacting me out of the blue every couple of months. Every time it set me back a little bit, and now I'm back at square 1. I know you'll probably tell me she was trying to string me along or something, but I don't think so. I won't be able to move on until I at least try.
And no, I wasn't a virgin before her.
>>704120707
how about if it was ur mate that lived and he was crying like a bitch front of his wife. what would you say to him?
>>704120510
Change yourself first. No one wants to be your super hero, especially a woman. Women do not want this.
Seriously broski, as a happily married man with kids and an amazing wife, I am fucking telling you right now, in caps so you get this, EVERYONE'S LOVE FOR ANOTHER PERSON IS CONDITIONAL. Some conditions are more extreme than others, but yeah, if I suddenly adopted your mentality, my wife would leave me in a matter of months. You've already realized you sabotage yourself. Don't you also think that in order to avoid that you need to start making some changes?
Stop putting that pussy on a pedestal.
Stop imaging what a happy life you could have with every woman that happens to smile in your direction.
Hit on chicks with no intent to follow through, fuck the rejection or the awkward looks from them or their friends You'll laugh about those moments 10 years from now.
Follow through and hook up with chicks with no intent to be with them longer than a few dates and/or fuck sessions.
No one exists for you. Exist for yourself.
Or fuck it, kill yourself or just continue basically waiting to die. Personally, though, I'd rather pick option A.
>>704121115
I really have no idea thats probably fucks me up so much
>>704121243
Why*
>>704121058
Nah, I don't think that, but I do know that women are fickle creatures, often not sure of themselves or their own emotions because they exist in a society that has zero expectations of them to have it.
There are certainly some super rare exceptions and special circumstances, but generally speaking, It's called a break up because it's broken.
If this week doesn't work out with her contacting you back, just stop. Stop responding to her, and fuck it, let her know why if you want to. Be real with it, son, but be it.
>>704121439
Yeah, that was sort of my plan. I wrote out a long text I'm going to send her this sunday if I don't hear from her. If the text doesn't get results, then I think nothing will. I'll do my best to move on.
>>704114134
Happy birthday anon
Your girlfriend sounds like a cunt tbh.
If you need anything I'm here
Story is especially pathetic so, here's some tits
>Be me, 22, college fag
>Have gf, qt 3.14 solid 7/10
>Ex gf hits me up yesterday begging me to take her back (left her for current gf)
>Tell current gf because she's been feeling insecure and I figure saying I told my ex that I was sticking to my guns would boost her confidence
>Freaks out, gets super depressed, feels mega guilty and self conscious because she "ruined my relationship" with my ex
>Be today
>Go to pains to cheer her up
>Everything seems fine
>Saying goodnight and stuff
>Like the gurgling retard I am I bring it up again to try and help her feel better
>Repeat of last night
>Drops hints that she might leave me and stops texting me
>chronicdepressionintensifies
>Suicidal thoughts everywhere because I'm an unstable millennial who can't control my emotions
>Text gf about it
>She freaks out saying it's all her fault
>Text ex gf about it
>Genuinely helps me calm down and talks me through everything, offers tofly out to see me in the morning
Why the fuck did I leave her again am I retarded?
>>704121869
holy fuck do the world a favor and throw yourself off a bridge
>>704121869
well dude she wants you back, why don't you take her back?
I recently got dumped. Was with her for a year. She cheated on me with a girl and ended up having a "realization" that shes a total lesbian
mfw she never dated any girls after me and started dating a guy last week
>>704122086
I missed my chance to do exactly that yesterday on my afternoon run
you guys see an hero as a solution to everything. we'll get through this /b/ros
>>704120707
Brother hit up Warrior Point or battle in distress, a lot of us are going through the same. Don't be afraid to let your wife know why, do get help but also make sure to keep your loved ones in the loop. It's hell but it does get better, I know you're tired because I've been there but push through and let the ones that matter help you with that load. Don't resort to emotionally abandoning them, it fucking blows to tell your wife what's up but trust me she's going to help you out of the darkness.
>>704121243
No. You would tell him to stop being a lil bitch. wise the fuck up man, you lived he died end of. but now your constant bitching and crying is making his loss of life worth nothing. do something for your wife. go somewhere nice. do nice things (civi things). dont make it two losses for no reason mate.
>>704122483
Thanks bro
>>704120707
I'm so sorry, anon.
Thank you for your service, it's very much appreciated.
I hope you get through this.
Amy good free streaming sites? gonna have a perfect opportunity to kill myself within the next month or two, might as well give /b/ a good show
>>704122670
ATTENTION SEEKER
>>704122714
worst than asylum seekers
>>704122533
You responded to the wrong guy, I was in his boots two years ago. That 'man up' meme doesn't always work. I was downing bottles of Jameson like water following that advice, and almost ruined my marriage by walling up.
>>704122714
this is a feels thread, and besides, any attention i get won't matter when it's done
suppose i could just google it though
>>704120707
Hey I was RCP in afghanistan I did area clearance for the 82nd airborne for three days and two deep buried IEDS took 3 lives. It was clear for me not for them, it happens, it sucks. Ill think about it forever but it just happens,
>>little piece of american leg, he was cheating on his wife anyway
>>704122593
Any time brother, just remember your wife isn't going to judge on a wound like this. She'll probably put out more too if she's like mine, a good hate fuck is better than therapy.
Have any of you felt like you are the supporting character to someone else? like, if your life were to be a TV show, you are supposed to be the main character of your own show right? but, then you meet someone who befriends you and then it all starts to seem like if the world revolves around them. like if your TV show was theirs and your just part of the supporting cast. To me, my life feels like that. And it sucks.
>>704123095
Depersonalization/derealization
Look it up
>>704120330
I just mean in terms of happiness. Values and all that are important, i guess.
But if those values arent letting you feel something as basic as happiness then
I think it's worth changing something mentally. Of course i mean emotional
happiness and not fufillment happiness.
This is some OC
Not by me, but it fuckin hit hard when I saw it. Had to screen.
>>704122821
so when someone told you to man up you became an alcholic? thats not the persons fault for telling you to man up? ++ i told this guy to do good by his wife. got a problem with that go fuck yourself
>>704123131
holy shit dude, fucking thanks for this. im gonna read up on it. how do you know about this?
>>704123410
manning only works on normies.
>>704119752
>Broke up with gf similar time
>mess of lies from her friends (she blocked me and her friends were feuding with her)
>Not fully over her, talk about getting back together
>she cant decide
>wait a lot
>no decision
>wait some more
>No decision, force an answer out of her by saying that if she really wanted to pursue a relationship, she wouldnt have to think this hard
>she agrees
>we give up
>next day
>she's unfriended me
>"why did you unfriend me?"
>"we called it quits didnt we?"
>check her fb
> "anons gf is in a relationship"
>he's 2 years older than her, 3 years older than me but definitely a fag
>hurt as fuck
>its okay, he drives a ford fiesta unironically
>she blocked me after my reaction was "lmao"
>havent spoken since, theyre still dating
>miss her so badly
>wat do
>>704121194
I don't want someone to literally be my superhero. I just want someone who wants me back. I'm tired of being alone. I'm tired of being unloved. I'm tired of being torn down by everyone around me. I'm tired of being hated. I just want one person that makes me feel like I should exist.
I wish people would understand it's not as simple as changing myself. I've been trying. No matter what I do I can't break free. I want to be that guy who can easily talk with women, or really anyone for that matter. I want to be able to have a life worth living. Any time I think I might have a solution someone or something comes and tears me right back down growing the demon on my back a size each time. I wish change was as easy as some people make it out to be but it's hard to change what has become a major part of you even if you never wanted it to be.
>>704114134
Happy Birthday Anon, try your best to avoid a life of pain
>>704123559
i served, tis all i know. My dad was a mean cunt, im a mean cunt and my son is a mean cunt. dont like the way i spout my shit dont read it cunt. he does need to man the fuck up tho simple as would you have a guy crying on the battlefield? no you fucking wouldnt.
also, in the period between finding out she didnt actually cheat on me (mess of lies) and her unfriending me, we talked a lot and I was seriously hopeful for the future.
She conveniently forgot to mention she had been seeing someone while "deciding" whether to get back together.
Girls are stupid.
>>704123649
you're a stupid cunt.
>>704123430
Yeah...I have it. I took drugs one time and it fucked me up bad. I ended up with visual snow syndrome and if I look at he slightest bit of light it leaves colored blotches similar to looking at the sun...but with literally anything with the littlest reflection of light.
As far as depersonalization there's a lot of different forms of it but the best way I can describe it is with this picture.
>>704123410
You dumb nigger, 22 a fucking day. Go to a graveyard and fucking tell them to man up. 'Manning up' isn't going to fix shit in these kind of situations, it only results in self medicating , and self destruction. If it was only depression or anxiety I'd agree with you.
>>704123808
this is a feels thread.
You're the one who needs to adopt the
>dont like the way i spout my shit dont read it cunt
philosophy
>>704123808
I bet a lot of dudes were crying on the battlefield in ww2 when they were forced to be there.
I mean youre right, manning up is the solution, but some people are so stuck with their
self sorry bullshit they cant even make a leap that far.
>>704123905
Thanks anon
>>704123977
>feels thread
like there are some sort of rules saying he cant talk his shit.
>>704124020
>Battlefield
Pretty sure anon dealing with shit is civilian now. The combat readiness stuff is pretty pointless, it's about adapting and finding a healthy method of coping/healing.
>>704124308
idk wtf you're talking about lol
im not sure if it's related to what i said.
>>704123430
This might be a stupid analogy but bear with me. This is the best way I can describe.
Depersonalization feels like everything is a movie and your watching it on full HD, first person with a VR headset on that is completely weightless.
>>704124571
I understand how you feel, have you had this feeling your whole life?
>>704116586
My mother had her tubes tied after having my older sister, and my twin didn't make it to child birth. I was born a month and a half early.
>I wasn't supposed to make it.
>>704124673
Nope. Like I said, tried drugs once and then woke up the next morning like this with a fat migraine.
That makes me think though. What if someone had it their whole life? How would they even know if they didn't have anything else to compare it to?
>>704124731
My life has become the vengeance for the one that was stolen from me
>>704124731
My feeels they hurt
>>704124854
Stop doing drugs for a little while and it'll be ok. Jeez, I don't know why I've been 'coincedentally' seeing people bring up this theory so much here, when I've known about it for a couple of years now. Maybe I really am the only person that exists in this world. You know the Aurora shooter was suffering from something like this, only worse:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mixed_affective_state
Also, this is a very basic theory you're describing, I've heard it referred to as many things, including solipsism and existentialism. Read up on this, Schopenhauer I think could elaborate for you on his "Representation" half of the book. I own it, I still haven't started reading it yet
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_World_as_Will_and_Representation
>>704125076
Nah this happened well over a year ago. I don't do drugs. I tried it ONCE. I smoked weed for like 5 years though. I can't even smoke anymore, I just get a huge anxiety attack if I do. I've been straight edge for a year now ever since then.
>>704125076
Also, thank you bro. It really helps me venting about it. I'll read it up on it more.
>>704125204
What did you try that did this? If you don't mind me asking
My life is falling apart. I haven't improved myself in years. I've gotten worse. I'm having so much trouble just feeling comfortable in my own skin. Inconsistent and undisciplined. I just want to run away and start over somewhere or isolate myself.
I need help. I can't do this alone. I need to learn how to relate to people again. I need to make friends and quit hiding in my house hating everyone I meet and imagining they hate me.
>>704125365
Well I smoked weed and drank for years. Had a gf and she introduced me into some bad crowds. Ended up buying some shitty LSD and tried it. 12 hours of literal hell. But at the same time I wanted it, just a lot less. I recovered from it, but then a month later I tried mushrooms thinking it would be calmer and not as fucking crazy. Boy was I wrong.
Now I have visual snow syndrome. My vision warps. I constantly feel like everything is fake. Cloudy thoughts all the time. Smallest bits of light can hurt.
I've never seen a doctor or therapist or anything about it either. I doubt anyone can help me, I also don't want to be on ANY medication at all. I refuse to take ibuprofen, even.
Every fucking day I wish I could be normal again. I don't even remember what it feels like it's been so long.
>>704125583
Shit, I've always thought about trying acid and shrooms before. I guess its safe to say stick to weed. Thank you Anon, trust me that one day life will be normal again.
>>704125365
I also have severe paranoia. I feel like someone is gonna drug me all the time. Can't date anyone who smokes weed or anything else in fear that if I kiss them I might get a contact high to what ever they've taken. Fucking retarded, I know. I can't eat anything when in groups unless they eat from the same batch. I always check from breakage in anything sealed that I buy from the store because I fear someone might have tampered in it. Also doesn't help I live in a shitty desert town full of meth heads
>>704125815
Thank you.. it really means a lot /b/ro. Trust me don't ever do drugs. It fuckin sucks. Get high on life. and there's nothing wrong with weed, stick to it
>>704115410
I haven't had real friends... ever?
>>704125583
>>704125948
>>704125815
Every time I've tried acid or mushrooms, at least after the first time, I was aware that I'd never be the same again. I get all of those things you mentioned, but you know what? I don't think about them. And if you stop psyching yourself out and really tell yourself that everything is okay, which it is, than you won't have these problems either. I still have panic attacks from an acid trip over three years ago that fucked me for life. I don't take acid anymore, except on rare occasions. I could go on for a long time, but to the extent you had a bad trip, you had the potential to have a good trip in equal quantities, had you let your mind go there. I actually don't take psychs anymore because I'm always paranoid that I'm epileptic and going to get a seizure, even though I've never had one. Just give it more time and don't try any harder drugs. If it's really unbearable, then you probably to need medication/proffessional help, and the acid/shrooms just exemplified that.
>>704125948
and there's a lot wrong with weed. it makes you lazy. boring, and stupid honestly. the sooner you get over that phase the better, trust me.
also the reason why i dont regret any of my trips is because although they've hurt my sanity. i feel more grounded and goal-oriented in life. it could just be because it's too late, and even if so, that's the best advice i can give. why spend any amount of time regretting something you can't change? you have the potential to do anything you want in this life and you're going to spend it regretting decisions you've made? you're stronger because you survived. use you experiences, good or bad, to help you
>>704114134
To
And happy bday
>>704116904
>STOP
Bumping with Butterfly story.
Why not tell a tale?
So here goes:
>be me
>junior year of hs
>6/10 master edgelord
>long story short goes out with friend from 7th grade
>she doesn't have muh edges
>always treat her like shit
>jump to about 3 months of this
>break up
>get together again
>repeat
>she never speaks to me
>visibly RECOILS at my touch
>we split up again
>for about 6 months I was mad at her
>then I realized how much of a shit person I am
>edgelord friends I tried to impress all stopped talking to me after HS
>I treated a friend of 6+ years like garbage
>I treated a girlfriend like garbage
>kill me
I loved her, and though she may not have loved me the same way, there was a connection. We never became anything more than friends but there was a feeling inside me, that she cared more than any other friend. She said that I was the only person in her life that hasn't hurt her, and it made me feel great. But yet I pushed her; I pushed her because I felt that I didn't deserve her. Her messages would remind me of everything that's wrong about me but she never says anything to provoke this, in fact, she would laugh at my stupid jokes or encourage my dumb ideas. Because of my self-hatred and her kindness, I lost her.
I got diagnosed with schizophrenia yesterday.
Not really feels, just need to tell someone as my family doesn't care.
>>704128823
I'm sorry, anon. I'm schizoaffective, so not quite the same, but I feel for you. I hope you'll be alright.
>>704114251
hung himself from a ceiling fan??
he was 3 pounds, or what??
>>704128982
I have /b/
And, you guys are amazing.
My happiest memories are on this shithole of a site. I have laughed myself to cramps and cried myself to sleep because of /b/. I know about the world, and how other people fuction because of /b/.
I don't know a single person on this site, but I feel like I know you all.
Love you guys to death.
>>704117140
"Some will win,some will lose, some were born to sing the blues."
>>704114134
Happy birthday anon! I would have brought a cake, but I don't have any money.
>>704129287
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Youre poor
>>704129287
Fatty fatty
You eat the patty
I go for fatism
And you for feminism
>>704129287
Roses are red
Mexicans should go outside to rake
This kind anon wishes a happy birthday, but with no cake
>>704118715
as a woman, can confirm
>>704129287
His birthday did greet
by the pennyless Neet
No money to buy
Alas, the cake is a lie
>>704113451
I hate cats so this was satisfying
>>704129345
>>704129383
>>704129433
>>704129538
>>704129655
>>704129666
WRONG
ALSO CHECKUM
>>704119380
>waaaaaa I'm the only one allowed to be upset
Fuck off, kindly. Just because your life is "worse" doesn't mean his is any "good" .
The thread might be ded but just wanna share that when it comes to feels, the ones that are about the loss of a friend alway hit the hardest
>>704114966
Bitches, sure. Women I care about? Not so much.
I've spent my entire life pretending to be other people /b/. I got pretty good at it too. Then I fell in with a guy and now I'm slowly realizing there's nothing left of who I used to be. I'm just a jigsaw of people I'm not, and the only thing holding it all together is that I'm afraid to die.
I can't let him go because I make him happy, and that's all I've ever really managed to give someone else. At the same time, I can't give him anything like the emotions he gives me because I just don't have any anymore. All I feel is hollow.
I'm still good at faking it, though. Lots of practice.
>>704129208
We love you, too. Thanks for sharing your time with us. It's being here with our /b/rothers that really makes life bearable.
>>704129975
Happiness isn't the most important thing in life. Instead of making him happy, you could wait until he's really attached to you, then kill yourself. It will either break him or, after a period of grieving, make him stronger than ever
>be me
>broke up with GF like 3-4 months ago
>i always find myself up at 4 or 5 AM
>i'll go on her insta and look and photos of her
>while doing so I always play her favorite song https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3d7Yl135twU
>it's been months and im still not over her
>after we broke up she found someone else in seconds
>i loved her so much
>inb4 she's a whore
>we'd talk and text & facetime everyday and we'd tell eachother how much we love one another, she'd always be the talking more, i was always a little more quite
>loved her with all my heart
>i want to cry but i'm on anti-depressants and the only way to cry is to skip a couple doses then have an emotional breakdown and have suicidal thoughts
>she was the hottest GF i'll ever get, i have no idea how I even got anywhere close to her, i didnt deserve her in the slightest
>she was perfect, the only girl i could make perfect conversation with, she was so easy to talk to, she was like an angel
>she's gone and dating someone who has there life together
>i can never forgive myself for letting her go
pic fucking related, her
i miss you
>>704115235
I frequent these often, sometimes post the same shit. Whatever.
>19
>end up at a grocery store working
>girl works there
>instantly attracted
>spend months fighting the urge to ask her
>finally do it
>says "yes"
>go for a quick lunch
>it goes well (in my mind)
>give her my number next day at work
>not called for 3 weeks, yet see her and talk most days
I'm going to ask her out and be blunt about it. I'm going to tell her if he's nort interested to tell me to fuck off.
And then in a few months I'll probably get myself killed somehow
>>704130107
Eh, he had like five or six people go paws up around him within two years a bit ago. I think he's well immunized to death. Me, I'm just not really willing to die. What I want is to just let everything go at once, throw everything into a car, and just be fucking gone. I'd come back when I put together a person I could be happy being.
I don't dislike him, or anybody, really. I just need time to figure myself out. I know it's not too late, if I just had some time to think it'd come back to me. I know it would. I hope it would.
>>704114134
IVE BECOME SO NUMB
>>704116904
It did for me
me and my girlfriend are emotional wracks who both just want to be loved
I have a lot of friends but on the other hand my girlfriend dont
I hate it to be social but my girlfriend cant be social
>>704130532
Im similar to your, except I want death. It's the only way out, and I'm hoping that there is nothing after death.
I thought time alone would cure me. It didn't. I sunk deeper into current condition faster than when I was maintain long minimal hukan contact. I just want to feel love but I won't. I know, objectively, that my chances of finding a good woman who will "love" me for a long time is almost non-existent but my fucked up mind won't let go of the idea and it kills me more and more each day.
if this post and the next 3 post are dubs i will kill myself
>>704130763
not today, god. Not today.
It's early afternoon here
>>704130763
Just do it. No point on waiting for some variable rate of posting across the board to determine your life. This is the last action that you will have full control over your life
>>704130833
Fuck off euro
>>704130435
Be a man nigger. Shave. Have good hygiene. Brush teeth. Wash hair. Be confident. Work out. Let her know you have hobbies and goals.
=
Attraction
Fug er pug de tip in
>>704130741
I encourage you to fight, anon. If for no other reason than if you lose, you won't lose anything you treasured anyways.
I spend my days disappointed with who I am and wondering who I was, but as long as I'm still here there's still the game to be played. I'm not willing to give that up yet. If I go down I want life to take me down, I won't just throw the game to go home early.
>>704130833
>>704130786
>literal alltism jesus
>>704115751
Tell her you need to go buy some monster condums and then let a couple hundreds drop out of your wallet.
>>704130978
I must don't see the suffering as worth just so I can say "lol I died of a heart attack when I was 60"
Thinks don't bring me much enjoyment. One of the only things left that makes me laugh is YLYL threads and my brother. Few other things make me feel happy even for a second. I don't want it to be this way but no matter what's I do, I can't shake it.
My dad has mental problems so im sure I just some of what's he has.
Be sure to have lots of kids everyone!
>>704126805
same
>>704113394
>be me
>start week out by mustering enough courage to ask a girl at work out. Said she had bf
>next day, go to gym, walk out, truck has be stolen with my 1911 in it.
>get into argument with dad about truck cuz he loaned it to me while I save to buy something else.
>will have to pay him $3000 for truck which will take my savings back down to $0
>gotta find way to get to work.
>PD calls says truck found, not in drivable condition. Idk to what extent, but doesn't sound good
>mom got ill and just had surgery and will be out a week or so
>>704116235
Poison all of the dogs so that you win. Or just the two that are leaving so she looks shity.
>>704117485
Wuss.
My dad killed himself, my uncle killed himself, my best friend killed himself, another good friend died in a house fire. all the love i had has been pounded out of me
I've hated existing for as long as i can remember and have had suicide attempts which put me in comas, now I'm scared to try again
i need a gun
these threads make me feel not so alone. thanks for feeling, /b/
>>704131207
I can dig it. For me it's a personal victory to hang on by the fingertips, I feel like just offing myself would be giving up in the most permanent sense. I want to do my damndest to stick around and figure things out, no matter how much it gets confusing and painful.
Good luck out there anon. No matter what you choose in life, I believe in you. All of you.
>>704117722
This is what we do here. Complain, chat, express ourselves a bit and try to feel better.
Welcome.
>>704119801
>>704117485
This, please. Do something, don't just wallow in the regret. Please, you got nothing to lose.
>>704117485
Sorry man you know you are just being a faggot. Go do something to fix this
https://www.youtube com/watch?v=x0WBIPZqf00
just happened to see that by accident, really fucking sad
>>704114134
Happy birthday
>>704114134
happy birthday you beautiful faggot, /b/ might be cancer but it's the only type of cancer that can actually make someone feel good once in a while. we love you
>was molested when i was 4 years old by a family member
>no one discovered
>22 yearls old now
>finally manned the fuck up and told my mother about it
>she hits me for not telling her before
>doesn't care about it, never talk about it again
>start feeling pure hatred towards her
>leave home, rents a room
>3 months later gets fired
>leaves town, goes to another city where there are at least a few friends
>friend finds me a room
>can't get a new job
>risk of living in the street next month
>no money to eat
>family doesn't help, says "you reap what you sow"
>mentally unstable since i told my mother about being molested
My parents always fought each other, and I assisted all of it. Never had real emotional support from anyone, always dealt with stuff alone. Bullying, heartbreaks, loss of friends, death of relatives, and always repressed those emotions. One I finally got something out, when I saw that bitch not caring about her own son, every single fucking thing I repressed came outside. I'm a fucking mess, can't seem to find a solution, money rules my life and I have none left, I never spent money on useless shit, I don't smoke, I rarely buy fast food, and what did it got me? Nothing. I'm on the edge of the cliff, and about to jump. Help me /b/, please. What the fuck do I do? How can I earn some money to at least survive? I cnsidered joining the army but I can't do it, not in this state. I won't be able to deal with the pressure in this mental state, I'll just close another door if I try it now.
>>704114134
Happy birthday anon. I forgot my birthday this year, so at least your life isn't that pointless yet. Cheer up, I'd buy you a beer.
>married for 5 years
>girl who I dated on leave messages me this week.
>tells me that she loves me and wants to try it.
>even knowing I'm married she's willing to keep the entire relationship on the dl until I make a decision.
>I love my wife but I am so attracted to this woman and it's almost a carnal attraction and I cannot fight it.
Me and my wife get along but with two kids, work and just life in general we have drifted apart and I don't feel needed, and it makes me upset that I feel this way about another woman, who I still feel so strongly about after all these years. What to do /b/?
>>704114134
happy birthday dude, i really mean it. I know how it feels to have a shit birthday. Had one just last week.
>>704114134
happy birthday Anon
>>704116586
Haha, just that?
