Please walk me through an average american meal
on the left you have your dipping sauce in the middle you have hamburger on the right you have chips/fries you can dip them in the sauce (you can dip the burger in the sauce if you aswell)
oh and on the very left you have you beverage to help wash it all down (i didn't see that until last)
Purchase your GMO ridden, hormone and steroid treated chicken breasts from your local government subsedy recieving, goods importing evil empire walmart.
Cook said chicken in your overpriced, shitty ass apartment held together with duct tape because your landlord is too cheap to reinvest in your property on your stovetop using either high priced natural gas that's helping deplete our fossil fuels or an electric one that the electric company price gouges you on every month.
Once cooked, be sure to use you fluoride ridden tap water to wash off your imported from China platewear to put the newly cooked GMO, hormone filled chicken.
baby arugula with mustard, red wine vinegar, olive oil and honey dressing made by me, whole grain rice with a bit of oil and salt, a top sirloin steak pan fried to medium rare after being marinated with soy sauce, and some broccoli steamed with garlic
First off, get a piece of meat, most people cut the fat off the steak, fuck that leave it on. Next, you'll grill it, make sure to apply melted butter, dump it on ever 5 mins while grilling. When done, apply salt. Add potatoes, add butter to that. Melted butter of course. And there you go
>Take EBT card to the bodega on the corner
>Buy Ramen and a coke with the $3 you didn't spend on beer and lottery tickets
>Pour coke into Ramen and microwave for three commercials
>Wipe off your drug spork and eat Ramen
>drink whatever beer is left in the cooler
>eventually pass out
>wake up at 4pm
>find an unoccupied intersection, preferably near the center of the city, and hold a cardboard sign telling people all about how hungry you are
step 1 is to fry everything
fry the bread, fry the meat, fry the VEGETABLES, fry your drink if you can manage it.
step 2 is to only eat it when it's hot. if it's not hot, go fry it again until it's acceptable
I'm American, I try to put everything I eat into a sandwich form. I like bread a lot
pizza? easy to make into a sandwich, not messy at all. the worst is soup or string pasta like spaghetti or angel hair, tube pasta is much more manageable
prepare proteins ahead of time in smoker; small brisket, turkey/chicken breasts, pork loins
either microwave a serving of frozen veggies or make a salad
select a beer or four
eat meal while surfing web
>typing all this out
>smoking a Phillip Morris product with those same fingers
>eats those GMO's for every meal
>guys I'm so smart to what the government does xdxd
>Please walk me through an average american meal
Well, I'm a neckbeard and I don't really know what others eat, but I usually do different things depending on the day of the week.
Breakfast is always, fruit, bread, cheese, and coffee or mango juice.
I order a soup, salad, or sandwich from the restaurant next to where I work. Sometimes on weekends I'll have a hotpocket or make nachos in the microwave. 3 Saturdays a month I go to a Korean bar and order Sushi.
>I cook a lot of good things. I make fish tacos, lasagna, homemade spaghetti, fried chicken, steak (always with chimichurri), and also middle eastern food like kebabs, falafel, etc.
I rarely eat fast food because I'm not a poor nigger and I don't want diabetus.
I pretty much stopped after MW2, shit was boring.
I had lamb chops tonight in a extra virgin olive oil lemon sauce. Paidakia mai latho lemono. I had Japanese Curry with pork and Jasmine rice last night. The American meal depends on the American you faggot.
>mfw americans consume more calories for breakfast than i do all day
Wink in the left eye then the right, crack your fingers and stare at the ceiling for 20 seconds, then you say, "Can you hook a brotha up."
I will reply, "The toilet is this way s-sir." We will go to the bathroom, then I will open the baby station, flip the secret panel and reveal the holy Subway special drink.
I only hate the people that ask for all the vegetables, then when you put it on they want more, and more, and more, then you have a fucking salad on a bun and can't close that shit.
One guy just ordered shittons of vegetables on a six inch and then made me squirt extra extra oil, mayo, and chipotle then complained when I didn't close it, he was smug the entire fucking time.
I commute to a big city, so my lunch differs whether I'm working or not.
If i'm at work, my lunch consists of take-out from a nearby bar/restaurant. my favorite specializes in wraps. not shitty wraps mind you, but glorious wraps. my favorite has grilled sirloin, cheddar, lettuce, tomato, grilled fresh jalapenos, red onion, fresh cilantro, and zesty mayo. I get it with their special chips and they have this crazy good mayo dip that is so good it doesn't even taste like mayo. I bring my own coffee, so i don't get a soft drink.
If i'm home in my piss-poor town, I have fast food like wendy's or mcdonalds. occasionally I will get food from a nearby chinese food place that formerly was a tattoo parlor (i get desperate for variety sometimes). I frequently order out dominos on the weekends when i've had a few drinks and don't want to drive.
I work out frequently, mostly biking, but I have leg days and arms days tuesday and thursday respectfully, so i don't suffer from obesity.
>Welch's soda RIGHT THERE IN ENGLISH
>smart phones, not flip phones
>massive amounts of food
they're not asian, idiot
Look at the money, retard.
>clearly all Asians
Usually shit like this doesn't phase me, but you've made me lose my shit right now.
Do you enjoy having siblings for parents??
I have to eat over 2000 calories with my workout regime. if i don't, i get extreme muscle fatigue and get lethargic.
i get it though, i hate seeing people who lose themselves and get so far gone they are a disability. if they get disability money, they should have to go through a rehabilitation program similar to prison.
Only the scumbags and "lower class" of the US consume nothing but burgers and fast food all day.
Most people eat normal, homecooked meals. Eggs with toast and a couple slices of bacon or sausage on the side for breakfast, some sandwich or some other shit for lunch, and some meat dish with sides of vegetables for dinner.
Eating nothing but fast food and fried shit usually comes hand in hand with a shit family life.
I eat one meal a day. I'm a southerner. Normal meal for me is two plates. Plate one is all veggies. Usually mostly cauliflower because I fucking love it. Sometimes green beans or broccoli. Plate two is half protein of some kind and half fruit. I usually drink three or four glasses of sweet tea with that. The rest of the day is just bottles of water. Sometimes some candy if I'm craving it.
I heard that Americans eat a cheese hamburger every day.
>inject insulin into my brautiful 99 stone body
>snort twinkie dust while cheeseburger is frying in the oil
>give my freah born a fist full of oreos
>have heart attack
>tfw no chz
a typical amish consumes more calories than you do before you wake up. they sometimes consume over 7000 calories a day.
I saw an amish whip off his belt at home depot and fish out thousands of dollars for timber from the inside of his belt. he had belt pockets.
they make awesome barns though.
McDonald's most popular sandwich is the Big Mac, so I'll describe that shit.
You get a big ass delicious two patty, three bun 600 calorie sandwich with onions, ketchup, big mac sauce, and other shit. On the side you have your golden crispy fries and a beverage of your choice.
All of this for about $7, and all large of course.
can't tell if bait or not. there is no ketchup on a big mac. it's mac sauce is thousand island dressing.
well we eat on our laptops because that is they way our country's GDP isnt complete shit like your crappy little 3rd world nation. Now go take another 7 weeks of vacation and talk about how americans are lazy or fat. We will be the nation getting rich off your dumb asses.
I don't know, I've never had a Big Mac. Only ever got McChickens and Deluxe Quarter Pounders. The value never seemed justified in getting anything else - with a DQP you get literally everything. It's a quarter pound of flavor.
Varies from person to person.
The poor fatasses eat fast-food every day.
The rich fatasses eat rich, fattening, gourmet food every day.
The others live on rice, ramen, and whatever they can get from their parents or the soup kitchen.
you're forgetting the working class that gets deli meat from their local grocery store to make sandwiches for their kids and their lunchbox.
but everyone forgets the working class.
honestly, there's so much variety, it's hard to say who eats what. I grew up lower class, and now i live middle class. I sometimes have work lunches that are paid for by the company, and they are expensive. I can easily say all members of all different classes will eat differently regardless of class.
i went to a bbq with a black friend, they blew welfare checks to get sirloin steaks. i was a bro and fronted money for the alochol though.
No fucking way you can bug out with absolutely all that shit. Unless you plan to dig in and defense tower mode.
My method of survival is constant movement with what I can carry on self . Have supply caches in the Colorado woods I live in.
>Tldr; this is my land
I don't go out to eat much
I don't eat a lot of cake/pie
I don't eat fruit
Any form of potato is acceptable
I eat more chicken than anything, but occasionally a burger or hotdogs
I like a lot of cheese/dairy
I'm not a big fan of bread unless it's like the free shit at a steakhouse or breadsticks
Tldr: flavor>suggested portions
this. i have at least three stashes within 10 miles. they are all accessible via woodlands for cover. my backup plan is an abandoned railroad tunnel that's flooded except for the recesses that people stood in when trains traversed the tunnel.
big mac really isn't worth it, neither is the quarter pounder. You're really paying an extra $3 for lettuce and a bun.
Get a double cheeseburger, same a mount of meat. You can even get big mac sauce on it if you ask. Some places charge you for it, some don't
i usually make meals out of leftovers from family gatherings. take the meat, (bc there's always a meat) cut it into strips and throw that shit into a skillet w/ some seasoning or sauce. give it a few minutes and then add some vegetables (usually broccoli or green beans or something along those lines). let it cook for a couple more minutes and bing bang boom; tasty, easy meal.
i live in alabama.
>I thought you USA fucktards found a flag on the floor offensive
>especially when it has a bunch of shit on it
>also why spread out $80 like your some kind of baller
>junk food, something any patriot would want their country to be synonymous with
First i eat your moms pussy then her daughters. If im hungry afterwards i dream about food while im up their asses. When im not doing that its 70 organic/30 whatever is infront of me, u turbo nigger.
not very impressive freedom over there
and you're thinking about battle standards
during massed formations if a battle standard falls the commander of the unit it represents is considered to be dead or the unit itself destroyed
so the soldiers of that unit are more likely to panic, and the commander of the parent unit will stop considering the fallen unit for future actions
the burning the standard bit came about as a measure to prevent the unit from being captured, a standard in enemy hands means the unit is captured, a burnt to ash standard can't fall into enemy hands
What movies dickhead? The censorship laws are pretty much the same as USA if not more lenient.
A documentary came out in USA about Darwin and was boycotted everywhere apart from NY and LA, because your country is full of retarded neckbeard good ol' boys
>Lack of muslims in USA
have you ever got a cab in NY?
Obviously the poor discretion of the employee because there's no law regulating spoons in the uk.
Conversely in America a 50 year old man can get denied alcohol without ID whereas in the UK you don't usually need it (as long as you look of age)
They sure know their demographic.
For fucks sake, ive lived in america my whole life and have never been granted the gift of seeing this shit. Can someone enlighten me on where to go to see this shit?
we may have raped the language but we also raped you guys and sent you back to that fishing village you call a country (1812), and if i remember correctly we also saved your asses during WWII, so i think we've earned the right to spell shit however the fuck we want and eat whatever the fuck we want when we want, dont bite the hand that feeds you or we will gladly fuck up your teeth more than they already are
every country has a regulatory board you fucking sack of retarded autism
America was the country that invented regulation and censorship for films.
pre 1933 there was no regulation
>look up pre-code Hollywood
you make it sound like the war of independence was a grassroots movement for the people by the people.
It wasn't dickhead, it was so the rich wouldn't have to pay taxes to the British anymore
>The point stands.
>That was the year films started being regulated.
>It started in the USA
>Only one film was banned until 1999 in the UK A Clockwork Orange, at the request of the director because of international death threats and he was living in London at the time.
>and wow sir you certainly are retarded that is not even slightly true. I don't even know how to explain it to you because it's as simple as 1+1=2, it was never censored.
>You wanna talk about a country that still censors literature look at you fat tards
i dunno man i had some leftover rice so i made a tempeh fried rice.... quick marinade of Worcestershire and black pepper, threw in some onion, broccoli, and carrots, thick soy sauce, black soy sauce. Of course some eggs, over all pretty delicious.
we make a wide variety of food, latino, asian, italian, indian (goddamn i love indian food) and some staple american things like a roast chicken, meatloaf, sometimes just a nice pan seared fish. lots of veg, i can get a little heavy on potatoes and rice but i hardly ever actually fry things.
that said i have a friend that worked nights and he used to eat mcdonalds like every day and each time it was like 4 mcdoubles.....
>Not banned per se, but withdrawn in the United Kingdom two years after its release by Warner Bros. following a request for this action from its own director, Stanley Kubrick. This was not because of the alleged copycat violence inspired by the film contemporaneously reported by the media, as commonly believed, but because Kubrick had received death threats against his family. It was not allowed to be shown again in the UK until after his death in 1999 and before the release of Eyes Wide Shut, his last film.
big mac is overrated
double cheese is where its at
sub slivered onions
no pickles (i dont know why, i love pickles, but not on my burger... weird)
add tomato and lettuce
et voila it takes more like a real burger.
Step one: Go to McDonald's in stolen walmart scooter cart.
Step two: Order everything on the menu, pay with credit card.
Step three: Take a single bite out of everything and throw it away just to show those dirty etheopians whos boss.
Brown rice with corn, muchrooms, onions, and lean hamburger meat.
Organic chocolate milk, overpriced trader joes shit.
Its in a tupperware because im working. Im outside because im a security guard.
The Canterbury Tales
The Federal Mafia
The Grapes of Wrath
Homo Sapiens, withdrawn from sale by the publisher after being labeled obscene.
Lady Chatterley's Lover
The Meritorious Price of Our Redemption
My Life and Loves
Operation Dark Heart
Tropic of Cancer
Uncle Tom's Cabin
United States – Vietnam Relations: 1945–1967
Women in Love
It was satisfying to see it go in without much resistance. Time to enjoy some chocolate milk.
that is lol worthy
That was a butt fuck shitty war. Surprised America didn't go ahead with their plan to get involved, since you love draining resources on pointless conflicts.
Think of how many pussies died over the 20 year it took for you to lose Vietnam
What would happen if i squeeze it...
No that's true I thought you did said banned as in the past tense.
Well clearly you're doing the same. It's late and I'm enjoying some cigs.
>and harry potter's fucking gay we can all agree it's shit
Them Argentines were gonna buck buck yall nigger asses if it weren't foe us, nigguh!
Maybe your worth based on credit will one day collapse in on itself and cause a super depression.
You weren't even a country at that time. England had already created great art and history while your population was still in the ballsacks of the great grandfathers of the Europe's dregs and retards
The area is well lit, im from California.
>only 1 cheesburger
I eat one for first and second breakfast, lunch, dinner, dessert, aftermeal, and midnight snack.
It's imperative for us Americans to eat these or else we will drop below the 400 lb. limit and starve to death.
I love the cheeseburgers, that's why I work out and look so great
>mfw this was the shitty government grade lunch I was forced to eat for my time in school.
>Not getting spicy chicken nuggets
I think the most we've done was 400 spicy, 200 normal nuggets, 20 jr.bacon chezburgers, and 20 large drinks. I forgot if there were fries, if there were it was 20 medium or large fries.
Canadian, but I go on american-like eating binges on occasion.
Went to panda express and got sriarcha shrimp and orange chicken with noodles, and taco bell to get a gordita box. I ate this monstrosity of grease and salt, then passed out from the strain it put on my body, only to be awoken a couple hours later by an imminent need to shit.