School computer stories
>finish taking computer test
>log out and decide to fuck around
>use alt and numpad to make random symbols in username section
>turn off screen
>class gets out and I forget about it
>five minutes in to next class get called back to computer lab
>bitch teacher yells at me for breaking the computer and is reporting me to the office
>My and my homie discover the pronz
>google bigsausage pizza
>looking at dick in a pizza
>have rick astley / whatever song ready
>hit key / click mouse discretely
>takes teacher 1 gorillion years to figure out whats going on.
>take screenshot of desktop icons
>teacher has to get tech support in class to figure out whats wrong
>cmd is blocked
>write a small .bat file that opens it anyway
>use Net User command to create a new admin account
>log into admin account, nothing is blocked anymore, can do whatever I want
>friend shouldersurfed teacher's password
>we log in and open teacher programs
>ability to change and view everyone's password in the school
>can see what's happening on all other user's screens and remotely shut mess with them
>we get some faggot that everyone hated's password and change his wallpaper to something disgusting
>can also see all grades of all students, but we didn't mess with those since that'd go too far
>be me, 7th grade
>wanna fuck around
>go onto microsoft word
>write "69" in bold letters, and make it 72 font
>hit print and print off 70-150 copies
>walk out laughing
>kid is screaming down the halways "THE PRINTER IS GOING BERSERK"
>laugh my ass off
>at college many years ago
>college is getting pictures for a new prospectus
>want one of a room of students at computers
>photographer comes in and starts setting up
>load up paint
>draw a big cock and balls on the screen
>prospectus gets printed, expensive glossy thing thousands of copies mailed all over the northwest of england
>crudely drawn cock and balls in every single one
>started windows computer
>press the Fsomething key as it starts
>open some weird screen en press couple of buttons
>put a password on the pc. idea comes up
>all computers are now locked in the school library
>im only one with access for 1,5 weeks
All of those can easily be googled.
I think the bat file was just 3 lines with something easy as "run command" that could bypass the disabling of cmd.
Making a new admin account is easy once you get into CMD:
Net User Username Password /add
replace username and password with the one you want. After that log out of the computer and enter those credentials to log into the admin account.
You can also type Net User to view all accounts and Net User Username /del to delete accounts.
>all of 7th grade computing
>70% of class looking at beastiality
>25% goofed off, rest did work
>had limewire on USB
>know buy now what porn pics have viruses
>dowload on everyone PC in our room in 15min break
>network down for 2 day
School sucked, dunno why everyone watched that shit though.
>learned how to remotely shut down other computers anywhere on the school's network
>mostly used it to fuck with people
>the day I drop out of school I teach a few freshmen how to do it
>later heard my old math teacher kept having her computer shut off after I left
>also heard someone shut every single computer down one day
>hearty keks were had
I'm in my senior year right now. (Underage fag get off my board reeeeee, I've been browsing since 05)
Anyways we have all new wireless printers and projectors. I would connect and print pictures of display something on the projector. Usually porn but sometimes funny shit.
> Year: 1999
> UK College
> Changed every computer in main room to my own paid for AskJeeves search home page, using affiliate program.
> Earned 1p per search
> The computer room was ran by idiot 50 year old women
> All computers stayed with my homepage for a year
> earned a shit load of conversations.
>14 years old
>just learned some html
>just the basics like putting headers and images
>makes a html document named "the buswanker site"
>my friend thinks it'd be funny to put pictures of the head teacher and other teachers on it
>somehow the teachers find the document no idea how
>in the middle of class "anon, come with me to the head's office immediately"
>get a criminal record for "slander"
>Best friends with Tom and his adopted brother Fred
>Fred has been in the family for like a year and a half
>Computer class with Fred
>Teacher is a wad of lard that sits in chair all day and tells us to follow instructions on the board
>Class easy as shit, finish early every day
>One day finish early and messing around with Fred
>Throwing crayons and school supplies at eachither
>Lard ass starts screaming
>Struggles to get out of her chair and literally falls and faceplants on the floor and just lays there
>Busted up laughing, Fred calling her fat
>She uses her cellphone to call he principal who shows up
>Tells our parents, mine are mad but don't care too much
>Don't see Tom or Fred for like three days after.
>Tom finally shows up and is super upset
>He tells me his parents returned Fred
>in computer lab one day for a test
>finish early, ask teacher if I can play a game or something
>she's cool as shit, says yes
>I fire up the copy of Doom (plus some sweet mods) I have saved onto one of the main school servers and start playing
>buddy next to me finishes, suggests we do a deathmatch
>I'm game, we start one up
>as people start finishing the test up, they've noticed what we were doing and want in on it
>before long we've got a straight up LAN party going in the fucking computer lab
I believe I won the match too.
>just learned about some of the Google easter eggs
>change it to hacker Google
>teacher walks by
>she freaks out and thinks I'm hacking the Pentagon or some shit
>get in-school suspension
>play my PSP and nap for a few days because nobody gave a shit
>2005, innacollege UK
>work out local admin pw used when image was built
>net send command tomfoolery during lessons
>decided to go one step further and made a batch file to spam "anon is a fag" or some shit
>left it running on some PC in a back room no one ever goes in
>every computer in the campus had this message jammed on the screen
Education IT services are fucking amatuers.
Oh and some retard asked me how to spell something so I looked at his screen and he was changing his secret question....literally asked me how to spell the answer
>cue password reset and coming out email to friends and family
>went into computer block during lunch break
>around 45 PC's in one room
>went round to each mouse and took the ball out of the bottom
>40 PC's rendered useless as only around 5 spares kept on site
>When I was a child/teen
>In IT class
>"Bois, look up fissure on Google images"
>Everyone does it because we're kids
>It's actually an anal fissure
>Everyone freaks out because it's naughty
>In one of the computer labs
>Someone left their computer to go somewhere
>I don't like them
>Change their background to scat porn
>Lock computer and leave
Kek I used to look after a hosting environment/teeny weeny data centre, tl;dr we set up a unreal tournament server over Christmas and left it running all year by mistake.
>tfw if you've been to the doctors your money has, in a very roundabout way, paid for our dedicated server
>bro tier colleague works out local admin password used to image computers (noticing a pattern here)
>all machines had SQL running so they could load the same shit application we sold to users
>connect services.msc to other machines while they are on a call
>bathe in tard rage
>Internet blocked anything even related to games
>All computers had access to a public folder where anybody could open any file
>Made a folder called George Ames (get it?)
>Put pirated copy of Half Life 1 with Counterstrike 1.6 on it
>Tell all the lads
>Lan parties in the library after lunch
>People start putting their own downloaded games in the folder
>Whole school is in on it
>Become regarded as a god as the kid who put all the games on the computers
>Get to cut in line at lunch
>Make new friends
>Popular despite my pudgyness
>Girl even offered to kiss me if I showed her how to play
>It was on the cheek but my adolescent hormones didn't care
>Teachers never found out and nobody told the principal what we were doing
>I'm now in college with no friends and I stay in my room most of the time not talking to my roomate
Life is a funny thing.
>in computer lab
>idk 4th or 5th grade
>buddy tells me you can get cool cursors online
>download and install an obvious virus for free cursors
>make cursor cock and balls flopping around
>H E H.html
>log out and go home
>next day teacher mad AF but dont know who to blame because the only accounts we had were "Student and Teacher"
>early to mid 90's...i'm old
>put raw fish in small ziplock bag
>puncture a few holes in the bag
>go to computer room
>open up back cover of pc
>wedge it in there
>Have to use this program to type something (Don't remember what)
>Someone figures out that the program comes with a text to speech feature
>We all use illegible fonts so that the teachers/EDs can't read what we're typing
>We all use headphones, so they can't hear
>tfw we write stupid shit and pass headphones to one another, laughing at the robotic voice reading fucked up shit
Anyone else do this?
>start A-level computing (ie shit-tier programming)
>got an E in the end, but that is irrelevant
>lots of the new, autistic kids took this class
>one particular spacko thinks the best way to get friends is to bulk email to the entire school a bunch of porn files
>he left the school
>I don't know if there was a link
>playing flash-games instead of working
>suddenly the mouse starts moving towards the x
>figger and it tec or some such is trying to shut the game
>their can be only one
>commence the mouse battle
>every time the mouse is about to click the x nudge it away
>this goes on for a few minutes
>before the controls go dead
>and the game shunts
>as soon as I get control back
>open paint and write
>"this is exactly like auschwitz"
get banned from pc's for a month for calling IT Nazis
>a month passes
>"now we hope you've learnt your lesson"
>go into pc room
>print off 9001 swastika's
>go upstairs and throw them out the 4th floor window
banned for 2 months
I am not OP btw
>computer science class
>halfway into year and class is pretty cool
>teacher is a 55 yr old woman how has a helper dog
>one day we start a new project
>it is an animation project
>mfw i always wanted to do this
>get paired with some asshole
>I do all the work he gets on youtube
>get home one night, project done
>get horny, get idea
>create a masterpiece of porn animation
it was pretty shit thinking back on it
>school next day
>i tell partner to upload project
>"which one?" he asked
>me not giving a fuck says
>"the most resent"
>Next day get called to principals office
>partner is there too
>which one of you did it?
>oh shit, at this point I realize it
>by bullshitting and false logic i manage to pin it on some asshole kid hacking into the project
>completely believes it
> got off Scott free
>2 years later talking to partner
>brings it up
>confesses to making a porn on it and that it was his fault.
> Be me
> 1 year of high school
> Computer class, everyone has to do a powerpoint
> Person named Mathias in class forgets to log out when class ends
> I notice
> Go into class during lunch and to the computer still logged on to his account.
> Changes every image in his power point to scat and granny porn images and gifs
> Save and log out
> Presentation next day infront of whole class
> Projector showing EVERYTHING
> Didn't like that guy to begin with.
>Loaded every emulator and rom I could onto shared network
>Go uncaught for months
>Principal calls me into his office
>He wants tetris.
>Show him how to rig it up
>Teachers start giving me requests
>Dr. Mario, Bubble Bobble, Mortal Kombat
>I've turned the school computer system into an arcade
>Gamepads are bought for the school
>Be me 10 years old
>This massive dick likes to bully me
>One day we have computer science
>We have our own computer accounts, so if you log in on a different computer somethings remain ex. wallpaper and few documents
>10 minutes into the class I go to the bathroom
>About a few moments after there's a fire drill at school
>Teacher forgets me
>When I go running back to the computer lab, I see that everybody is gone and all the computers is unlocked
>Finds the dicks computer, starts googling playboy wallpaper and sets it as his wallpaper
>Logs off and run to the football field where everybody else is
>After the fire drill, the lesson is over and everybody just log off their computers
>The dick is still being a dick and makes me take a computer in the corner (so I sit by myself)
>He logs in on his computer and meets the wallpaper I choose for him
>The computer teacher looks at him in horror
>The teacher, his parents and everybody gets called in, saying how porn is not okay to search on school computers.
I got my little revenge that day.
>7th grade to now
>Log onto computers and quickly (like 3 seconds)quickly have admin privileges
> Use it to change wallpaper, mouse colour, sounds shit like that
>Retarded classmates think I'm a genius
>be me, 7th grade, 2001
>early morning computer typing class
>teacher turns on news
>apparently, some buildings have been hit by planes in New York
>everyone else in class flipping the fuck out
>teacher almost crying
>I'm thinking it's either a movie or whatever the fuck. Not really caring.
>thinking about playing Sonic CD on my Windows 98 when I get back home
>mfw not understanding the seriousness of what's going on
>be in gr.12
>boring ass programming class or some shit with all faggy nerd kids in here
>dont know why i was in there in the first place
>paki or indian(all same shit) teacher teaching some shit on board
>decide to go on mofunzone and play coolio beats 2
>start playing like a crazy motherfucker everyone hearing me smash the keyboard keys
>me not giving 2 fucks becuz i feel like slash in a fucken concert
>hear my paki teacher say turn that shit off
>i didnt know he was talking to me
>i was going in on this game like if my life depended on that shit
>says to turn that shit off
>i thought it was some faggy nerd kid trying to tell me to turn it off
>say "go suck yourself faggot" while still going ham on coolio fucken beats 2
>turns out it was the faggy paki indian teacher instead
>get sent to office
>in school suspension
>failed that class with a 12%
>be 16, still in school
>taking internship at local IT company
>get ordered to school
>been given all passwords
>fast forward two weeks
>turn school into botnet
>used it for the lulz on here for two years until they replaced the computers
Boring story to my back then best "hacking" stunt.
> Friend wants to show me this tits he saw on the Internet.
> Go to the back of the class where the retarded kid was with his computer. Friend tells retarded kid what to Google.
>We see boobs, friend then starts asking him "why are you googling that?" And confusing him so he believes he's the one that shows it to us.
>friend and I leave and go back to our work.
>after school retarded kid is in the principal's office with his parents because of it. Says he doesn't know why he did it but doesn't implicate us(because we were never approached by the principal or anything)
>retarded kid can no longer us a computer by himself and has to be with a partner for the rest of the year.
One of my teachers was a 'white' Muslim. She was pretty upset about the treatment she apparently got in the fallout of 9/11 for the rest of the year. As for me, I was just busy playing Dragon Ball Z Mugen 2 with my fellow weebs.
>be me.. be a dutchfag
>we used to have this web-to-sms site called smscity where u can buy credits and send sms to whoever
>install keylogger on all pc's at school i could get my hands on
>make this master smscity account
>grab hunders of smscity logins
>log.on all of them and transfer all credits to master account
>used this account to send bulk sms to friends and fuck with them.
>one night i sent 400 messages to a friend
>next day he said his dad got mad and broke his phone cuz of all the buzzing going on..
anyone 'member the little script that would just keep copying multiple copies of every file on hd to desktop... killed every machine in school with that little doozie... was late 80's early 90's so school only had 13 machines...
i regret nothing
I was in 7th grade choir when our teacher stopped and turned on the TV. We were all collectively wondering what was happening. By my next class the second plane had hit the other tower and we left school early that day. It was all weird to me at the time, and I didn't quite understand how 2 pilots could get shit so wrong at the same time
I was just thinking about anime and vidya games the whole time. The rest of the year was filled with fear-mongering and anxiety. People talking about
>seal up your windows and open your mail carefully, so the anthrax doesn't get you
Even church (when I was a Christian) had us believing that the Middle East had some super-powerful military elites who were gonna lob nukes at the U.S.
Holy fuck back in the 90's we did that same thing. Had a copy of Doom on CD someone brought to school, installed it on every computer and we all played together for the rest of the year. Teacher never did anything about it.
>back in early 90s
>computer lab day
>standing in line waiting to hunt in oregon trail
>in comes tardafulus rex name was jack
>jack was full blown tard he was 12 yr at the time keep in mind it is the 3rd grade not to mention he has to wear a full on helmet because of potato head syndrome
>jack crashes through line of us all while yelling danger is middle name
>computer lab canceled due to several casualties
>fucking hate tards
It's interesting to see how much fear can be used against stupid or ignorant people, no matter what year it is.
Here's my computer lab story
>1st grade, learning typing or some shit
>have to take a shit, don't care enough to ask so I just keep rocking it at Mavis Beacon
>getting those high scores, shit my pants
>after a little while a few nearby girls start complaining about the smell and ask me what it is
>I brush it off and say it's probably the printer, back then they were all dot-matrix printers and the ink DID smell funny
> after class I go to the bathroom and clean out my shit
>Next week I see them installing a new printer
>9th grade English class
>school had laptops and we were writing something for the class then printing them off
>printer in classroom wasn't working for some reason so we were told to send the file to the printer in the library downstairs then go get it
>finish what I was writing and hand it in
>let's fuck around for a little bit
>saw funny picture on memebase of some guy who made a word document that said "CAN't OVERLOAD SCHOOL PRINTERS, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED."
>I decide to do the same thing
>make file and send over a thousand copies to library printer
>other kids who go down to get their papers come back with big stacks of the documented I sent to print
>no one could figure out what happened
>fast forward to end of day, I get called to office
>walk into vice principal's office and told to sit down
>vice principal reaches down and plops a big stack off papers on his desk
>takes one and shows me it and asks "Was this you?"
>"Get out of my office!"
>turns out I'm retarded and they could see who sent the file because they saw whose account it came from
>just wanted to see if I would lie
>get suspended for a couple days
That English teacher just got sentenced for doing shit with one of his grade 9 students.
>think im a l33t computer hax0r
>get done working on project
>me and friend have an idea
>make vbs script that spams text windows and doesn't allow you to type
>make batch script that spams cmd windows
>put it in startup folder
>2 days later
>friend and I get called into computer lab
>End up with in school detention for a week and have to fix the computer.
Did you become stupid from an injury, or were you born that way?
Let me help you. When you see someone post
That means that is when it took place, not that it is their current situation, you ignorant fucktard.
>freshman year circa 2009
>be socially awkward fuck
>every student has unique username
>consists of graduating year/first initial/last name
>school has account for all library computers
>username: lib password: password
>incompetent IT department
>decide to start using this account because of new program they install called impero
>basically 1984 realized
>everything you do was monitored and linked to the account you're using
>one day I was taking a shit after school
>the fucking bus leaves without me
>fuck this, I'm not going out into that shit
>stay in bathroom for an hour or so until school is empty
>trapped at school alone for 6+ hours
>go to library to fuck around on computers while I wait for mom to get off work
>3 pm, mom gets off work at 9pm
>log into computer
>>username: lib password: password
>watching youtube, playing flash games and other stupid shit
>get bored and start looking through random folders on comp
>find random folder forget the name
>it contains every students personal cloud folder
>be edgelord atheist in kenfucky
>decide to flood everyone's folders with gore, gay/scat porn, and satanic images.
>spend roughly 5 hours filling every folder I can with 500+mb of the nastiest shit I can find.
>find folder of kid I hate
>mfw he's the IT lead's kid
>decide to leave that one alone
>hoping teachers would blame him, but realized it probably wouldn't happen
>8th grade ( I think)
>grandpa PC teacher tries to teach us BASIC (or shit like that)
>we instead sticked a lot of adhesive tapes on the back of his jacket
>also tried it to ignite it with lighter
>btw the jacket was actually still on him
I knew this kid in highschool who once got suspended because he took apart a couple computers and took the ram chips out and put them in another computer because the computers were shit.
he actually has aspergers
two years later ended up hacking my school's website and servers. never got caught, just got a bunch of information that I shouldn't have had. There's more stories I have but just gonna stick with these two.
My highschool actually had a robotics program, I was in it. Would build and program robots and partake in the VEX competition.
Would learn and code in like C++. I didn't like coding so instead I designed most of the robots.
I designed one that won a tournament and sent our team to worlds.
9/11 9/11 9/11 doesn't that bullshit propaganda sob story ever get old to you yanks? fuck me every chance you get you bring it up as if the rest of the world even cares... it's only you usatards that still believe that story...
how the fuck that topic even features on this thread is beyond me... as i said before fuck your self caused tragedy... bush did it
>15 years old at the time
>teacher gives no fucks about what we do to the computers in class
>no knowledge of computers at all
>me and my boys are chilling at the back of the room
>one of us thinks it'd be a good idea to squeeze a gogurt into the air intake
>he goes through with it, as the yogurt hits the fan it makes an awful noise
I hated days off from school, because it meant I'd be spending those days either cleaning around the house or doing yard work.
Janitor came in the classroom one time with like 1200 printed tests ( wireless printer on the other side of the school ) all tests had swastikas on them, no one in the classroom laughed except me and a friend, got in the sickest of problems
>School has network printing
>Personalized accounts for every student
>Had to use a special login code that wasn't personalized for a test for whatever safety reason
>Check if the test login code works
>Print pornstars in the library
haha, I did something like that before. We had to take this bullshit moral test in middle school and I put adolf hitler as the name and drew swasticas all over the paper. A week later the whole grade has to retake the test because of it and I was absent that day kek
>be me 8th grade
>me and friend are kind of knowledgeable with computers
>we wanted to do fuck with the IT guys, they were dumb shits, even compared to 8th graders
>after school about 4:00 no one in library
>me and friend go in and turn on all computers
>create a batch file on every single computer, including the admin computer
>fast forward, next day
>called down to office in 2nd period
>principal wants to talk to us
>"did you and anon do this"
>get 1 week of in school suspension for it
And the school computer were down for literally weeks while the the tard wrangler of an IT guy tried to fix it
I did the same thing, except I took screenshot after screenshot after screenshot, keeping the old icons and just moving the image slightly every time
at the end it would be some sort of glitchy icons-dragged-out kind of thing
I'd ask the IT guys to help me out a couple of times before they realized what I had done
they were bro tier guys tho
>9th grade, 2004
>each student has a personal unit
>when teacher logs in the lab, all units unlock with it
>teacher projects what happening on our computers on a white wall, one unit after the next
>person next to me was absent
>site filters anf blocks do not exist
>google blue waffle on seatmate's unit
>turn off monitor
>go back to doing own business
>projection of screens begin
>room has huge glass windows so people see
>computer lab is in a busy corridor
>finally blue waffle PC gets projected
>projection was at random
>only few classmates saw
>everyone passing by outside was disgusted
>teacher too busy on his unit to look behind him
>blue waffle was projected on white wall behind teacher for at least 15 minutes
>does this again in 10th grade but with deadporo that time
Some people might BE teachers. Another thing, a majority of these pranks can be done in public places like libraries, or in office jobs where there are hundreds of computers and subpar IT.
>Don´t have friends, spend all recess in library fucking around on the Internet
>One day some program gets installed to censor websites
>No games, no gore, no porn, no mature content
>Pretty pissed off
>Do a little research and find out that program doesn´t affect Tor
>Go back to lurking
>Can´t shitpost no more, I am labled as a pedohile if I try to send anything with Tor
>One day a guy sees me using a browser he doesn´t recognize
>Explain to him the idea behind the program
>He wants to download it
>Soon the entire classroom has a copy on their pendrive
>They ask me more about Tor
>Tell them it's used to access the Deep Web
>Explain what the Deep Web is
>Two days later I hear two dumb fags got expelled for checking on CP in school
>Teacher sends me and like 4 other people to computer lab to finish our project
>I was a boob kid so I google searched: "biggest boobs in the world"
>No nudes but I called my friends over to show them
>They didn't give a shit, they just wanted to play online games
>It was awkward since I was the only horny toad so I tried to resume the project research
>Type "b" in google
>Auto fill saved as "biggest boobs in the world"
>I furiously spammed random nonsense that started with "b" in hopes that it would clear up
>"babdkwdik," "bawoldad," "bwkpdmkw," etc
>Lived in fear that someone might find out
are a tiny set of islands of no consequence if you are implying i'm english fail... if you are suggesting that the english bring it up like usatards do 11/9 [11th of september get it right yanks] then fail again...
ooga booga is cool, i liked that bit...
actually am a militant canadian nationalist with fearsome wrists and middle eastern descent...
i'm a moose limbed terror wrist...
Tricking your teacher into thinking their computer is broken is very specific to one place. If you were going to do it to someone else you would specify. And I am not saying everyone is underage just a few people itt
heh, I had Metroid Prime at least...
forgot to mention I deleted everyone's work
all projects, all essays, even everyone's senior portfolio. I deleted everything
>9:30 rolls around and see my mom pull up
>log off and go home
>get to school next day hoping to see a shitstorm
>but it's quiet
>end of the day everyone mad their work is gone
>almost everyone had seen copious amounts of porn
>dumbass teachers have no clue what the fuck happened other than "we got hacked"
>next day they hold 2 hour assembly at beginning of the day
>they brought the sherrif's department to try to figure out who "hacked" them
>sherrif does typical "whoever you are, we'll find you and you will go to jail" shit
>I'm shitting bricks but keep quiet
>confident I was covert enough
>they couldn't possibly know it was me
>dumbasses thought because they couldn't find what account was used, it must have been an attack from outside the schools intranet.
>mfw 12tstone was called to the office for questioning
>mfw people still talk about when the satanist hacked the school
Be windows 95/NT (schools just started using networking)
Passwords are in plain text format
Change all passwords to Banana
Change maybe 40 people grades so they don't notice I changed my gym grades to passing.
Supposedly cost the school $4,700 to get the passwords fixed.
At work last summer
get on co workers computer
change all windows sounds to 'critical stop'
Change windows shutdown to rick roll
dude was screaming
>Been curious about my sexuality for a while
>Decided to look up "S ex lube" on computer sense the world sex was blocked(Serious couldn't type it)
>German teach walks by
>Reads the tab I have it under
>Loud as fuck voice
>"WHATS SEX LUBE"
>Close out of the tab quickly
>Everyone staring at me
>"BRING THAT BACK UP ANON, YOU KNOW THATS NOT ALLOWED"
>Ask her if she can be quieter or if we can talk outside
>Every girl in class laughing at me
>Kid from across the room who makes fun of me on a daily basis
>"I'll pull up the search history for you miss!"
>Literally opens up another tab on my computer
>Pull up the history
>"WOW ANON PFF, NICE ONE"
>Literally walk away into the vice p office
>Cry for an hour
>She's hiding her laughs as she reads the write up
>I'm now known as sex lube for the rest of the time I'm there
>Eventually transfer schools
I was so close to killing myself..
>be 7th grade
>messing around with windows batch files
>trying to unlock cmd
>cmd was unavailable normally
>make a simple batch code that executes cmd commands when you give it to them
>right click on the cmd.bat file
>run as administrator
>IT FUCKING WORKED
>can now shut down any computer in school
>be a couple of months after i did this
>sitting next to your typical white popular bitch
>still a learner at the time so just messing around with cmd commands
>i set the color on the prompt to color a (green)
>(my fucking screen looks like the matrix)
>i was not too scared about getting caught since this teacher walked passed me all the time with cmd opened and never cared
>white popula bitch siting next to me asks what im doing
>tell her to look at computer i was pointing at
>some normies computer
>shut it down
>she freaks out thinking im some lulsec hacker
>tells all the girls that i can hack
>unlock cmd on there accounts and basically teach them how do shit in command prompt
>still fap to there fb
>computer lab teacher is a gamer
>organizes lan parties in the school 2x a year
>also math teacher
>computer lab is overlooking common computer area, where students can do homework etc. through some windows
>one kid is in plain view, everyone in class can see his screen from outside
>some old women are in charge of making sure everyone uses the computers for homework, not for myspace/games
>they can see everyone's screens on their PC
>our teacher is basically the master overlord admin
>there's some time left after class
>teacher decides it's time to fuck with this kid
>we take a vote what website we should put on his computer
>our wish is his command
>this kids face when his browser suddenly goes to pornhub
>the old monitoring ladies see
>the rest of the people there see
>old ladies making a ruckus
>this kid doesnt know what the fuck happened, trying to talk his way out of this
it was beautiful
the teacher went and explained it to the monitoring ladies tho
I'm just pointing out that's how you sound. There are still loads of theories about 9/11, many of which will never be taken with any credence because the American left believes the government can do no wrong.
I for one believe 9/11 was a setup, but I don't think it was by anyone in the white house. I think it was setup by either a private group, or possibly even high ranking military leaders. The question of WHETHER it's a setup or not is a ridiculous one as the meme suggests, "jet fuel can't melt steel beams." It's completely fucking true, and anybody with any kind of engineering knowledge would know that you would need thermate (a more powerful form of thermite) to burn through the steel beams the way they were.
>Be in HS some year
>Have all student account data bc I was entrusted with access I shouldn't have had
>School sets up managed Google accounts for everyone
>Bunch of faggots use their Android phones to sign in to school accounts
>Specific faggot I didn't care for also did this
>Signing in with an Android phone links it to Android Device Manager
>Remote wipe faggot's phone
>be in 5th grade
>compy is still so rare and magical
>have mine from home for show-and-tell
>boot up from floppies
>run Microsoft Flight Sim (pic related)
>runs so slow but has too many controls
>like for individual wing elevators and shit
>crash very slowly over and over
>social status as nerdy boring shitbag is solidified until I become a matching band faggot in high school
>creating a batch file that writes a never ending txt file
>change icon and place it on other computers in class
>computers die while their ram is being filled with a txt file
>eventually they order new computers because they think the old ones are "too old"
>do it again
"Steel loses about 50 percent of its strength at 1100°F," notes senior engineer Farid Alfawak-hiri of the American Institute of Steel Construction. "And at 1800° it is probably at less than 10 percent." NIST also believes that a great deal of the spray-on fireproofing insulation was likely knocked off the steel beams that were in the path of the crashing jets, leaving the metal more vulnerable to the heat."
>Decide to logout early
>Use Alt + Left Arrow
> Turn screen upside down
>Drag login prompt off screen
>Next day principal says to me "Anon, you have in school suspension for 3 hours".
>Took them 3 hours to fix my "hack"
>be me, 9th grade
>computer class was the same as spanish class
>teacher was a bitch named Ms. Miley
>whenever we'd finish our lesson/study time, we'd play games
>coolmathandfunbrain,jpg for all the normiefags
>i wasn't very into pc gaming at the time, but learned a little at a time
>find a free browser version of counter strike called cs portable
>after a while people started watching me and playing with me
>had a full on LAN party of about 30 people on an empty server
>principal comes in red with anger
>"anon, come with me"
>mfw i get suspended for "terrorist propaganda in school"
>be in College
>got a work project
>the goal is to create a "mini facebook"
>creating account, adding post and pictures, commenting, friends list, list goes on
>my group decide to make a "confirmation link has been send to you e mail" feature
>We (well mostly my partner, since i'm shit in php) write the php script
>make a tiny error : instead of sending 1 mail, it will send a mail every 3 second
>don't notice atm
>told everyone in the class (about 40 students) to try this out
>everyone receive a shit load of confirmation mail
>in 2 days i received one a junk address like 20.000 mails
>after a week or so, eventually, the school's servers can't hold the load anymore
>after days of being insanly low, finally crash, incapacitating all the other student
>admin find out who did the srcipt
>friend got his work space deleted
it was a fun time
"It is known that structural steel begins to soften around 425°C and loses about half of its strength at 650°C.4 This is why steel is stress relieved in this temperature range. But even a 50% loss of strength is still insufficient, by itself, to explain the WTC collapse. It was noted above that the wind load controlled the design allowables. The WTC, on this low-wind day, was likely not stressed more than a third of the design allowable, which is roughly one-fifth of the yield strength of the steel. Even with its strength halved, the steel could still support two to three times the stresses imposed by a 650°C fire. "
>2 years ago senior year
>see greentext about dude that copied "moose" so damn much it fucked up a shit ton of computers
>decide to try it
>copy and paste "FUCK"
>send a file to all computers so when it opens everyone is fucked
>almost piss myself laughing
>teacher reports it
>get called to office
>"Do you know who did it anon?"
>fucking sophomore tells on me
>blame it on accidental virus
>steal his phone
>saw his password early that week
>creepshot girls around school
>"I found a phone with pictures of women"
>kid gets sent to iss
>gets his ass beat cause the girls boyfriends are protein junkies from weight training
I hacked my classes server once and downloaded a virus.
The computers were locked down pretty tightly, all the usb ports were disabled and couldn't write to the HDD unless you had an admin account, we used the server to save work.
My friend found out that his computer had a working usb port in the back. I found out you could give others read/write privileges for your drive on the server.
At first it was just emulators and such but I started to get curious on how much control I could get.
I used safemode with cmd prompt to make a new admin user for my computer, renabled the usb ports and found out that the admin account gave me full control over the server.
The server and all the computers were connected to the internet but they blocked the dns servers on the computers. I switched to googles DNS and poof got internet.
I was trying to download diablo 2 but was having trouble finding a good place to download it, this was before torrents got huge.
I ended up on some real shitty ad filled site.
I downloaded it and it was ISO files and the correct size for diablo 2.
I got an iso tool and started to install diablo 2, at first everything seemed legit till I noticed the images in the install looked off and there was no music. And the install bar seemed off too.
Then my screen turned off then back on. Then suddenly windows got a major error and was doing a force shut down. A few seconds before it turned it self off it bsod, twice in a row. Like the bsod crashed and had a bsod.
I started to panic as I restarted the computer. I booted it into safe mode hoping I could fix the damage. But that was when I noticed other computers crashing and restarting.
I was fucked and I knew it, my computer booted into safe mode fine and I did a system restore and hoped that would fix it.
The next day in class we were told the server was down and that it had blown up. I looked in the server room and it smelt like burnt electronics and there was obviously some kind of fire in the room.
>be 11th grade
>learn about a weird strange command prompt that allows remote shutdown across all computers in entire library ( biggest pc lab in school)
>realize i have gods powers and start shutting pcs down like crazy
>shortly after learn i can add msgs that show up before pc shuts down as if its an error code
>start writing fucked up msgs to people not long enough that they could get a teacher but short enough so they could read it
>eventually shut down entire pc lab at once including mine
>show some autist how to do it and he gets caught within a few days and school suspends him from pcs for rest of school year
>got away scott free
Look up porn
Image still burned into my mind
Also, many years later:
>make .bat file that opens cmd infinitely
>teacher opens it by accident
>it also says dead babies infinitely
>crash computer and takes tech support 3 days to fix, although I don't see how
>suspended for a day
>be back in high school
>lab teacher is a lazy idiot woman who has no clue about computers besides restarting them.
>they got monitoring programs on all of the computers so me and my friends always undo that shit and fuck about.
>open regedit get the tech accounts password because idiot lab woman.
>log in, have access to all of the teachers computers, electric overheads, printers, cameras.
>print 50 pages of dicks to the councillors office
>open up camera in cafeteria
>Text a friend who had lunch what they were doing and sent a selfie of our mutual friend and I in the lab.
>write a simple vbs to delete the Google Chrome icon and prompt a message saying the computer has a virus and has to delete Google chrome, and deletes itself without the whole trash bin shit.
>I know that didn't actually delete it but dear god my school's stupid
>teachers always tell you to use chrome, so glorious.
>school wipes all lab computer and uses a backup from an unused computer in the office
>open up the network slap the vbs into it so every computer in the lab has to deal with it every week.
>friends enjoying the shit. He asks for a script that 'breaks' the computer
>vbs that prompts you to click yes on loop. To end you just open big brother task manager.
>put that on the backup computer too.
Had a few other things we did but that's the big shit.
It's more likely that it was a private group, possibly even those who have US politics in their pocket. If Bush was involved, he was not the one who set it up.
One more thing; Don't you understand how ignorant and pretentious you sound when you say Ameritards. There are 330+ million people across an area of almost 4 million miles/sq. Obviously, there will be some stupid people there. There are stupid people everywhere, just like you representing your country.
>computer design teacher was the baseball coach and didnt know shit about computers
>we did whatever we wanted on the computers
>assigned computer was next to a dindu
>months pass by and dindu keeps to himself
>one day i glance at his screen and jamal is on google images searching gay black porn
>without thinking i blurt out "what the fuck?"
>jameraqui chimps the fuck out and starts trying to fight me
>hes really pissed
>didnt want to get my ass beat so i tell him to calm down but im sorta laughing at the same time
>by this time the teacher is already between us so nothing happens
>i dont say nothing about it
>weeks pass and im still assigned the computer next to latrell
>dude is still looking at gay shit and is printing out pictures
>he finally gets caught and had to have his mom talk to the principal
>jalil moved schools right after
90% sure 100% of you did this at some point
>some time in elementary school
>have to put in student name and password to get onto computer lab computers
>find out that if you put a single space in front of the username it won't sign you in
>start doing it on my computer
>gets around to the whole class
>class period after doesn't know about this
>70+ year old computer teacher decides the network must be down
>they get to watch brain pop the rest of the class
>tech department finds out that it's just spacebar skullfuckery
For the rest of the year you'd get an honor offense if you did the spacebar thing, but i was just pissed at the time that they got to watch brain pop for a whole class and we didn't
>be in 8th grade
>download a bunch of Beavis and Butthead .wav files
>set computer to play one of them for every action
>turn computer off
>turn speakers all the way up
2 weeks later
>"Anon! Why were you trying to keep this secret from us?!?!?!"
>"What are you talking about?"
>"We got the referral you got that says you're banned from the school library!"
>"I have no idea what you're talking about."
get smacked around a bit, grounded, etc
Turns out the school administrator dropped the ball and never called me into the office to talk to me about the whole thing.
>I start student teaching at that school in 2 days
>The same librarian is there
>we use shit laptops and we can't do anything because all fucking sites are blocked
>have sub one day
>mfw shes a muslim
>go onto bing where you can watch previews to videos
>start playing my favorite song
>the next day hear announcement
>"Anon please got the principal's office"
>muslim is there
>principal and muslim are pissed
>mfw I got a week of suspension for playing ISIS's anthem in school
>sat with friend
>type a bunch of shit in to google trying to bypass the filters
>get to pic of naked woman with huge tits
>entire class jumps and staring
>teacher calls me to the front
>standing with everyone staring at me
>what did you type in to get past the filter and find that
>well? tell me right now what words you typed in
>"big fat greasy knockers sir"
>he writes it down
>8th grade programming
>Mac computers cause school is rich and retarded
>plug the usb from one keyboard into the port on the other. Start trying to type separate things on the two linked keyboards
>eventually gets to the point where we've linked 28 keyboards to one computer
>opening and closing and printing and logging off about 150 windows at once
>leave without cleaning anything up
>be me 10th grade EU
>new teacher for informatics
>28y old blonde
>hot in shape etc.
>me and friends tell her she is hot
>talk about who fucked who on purpose near her so she can hear
>ask her if her husband is good in bed
>she always had this smile when we do shit like that but always listen
>she was always cool with me
>in the summer me and friends chill at arcade they have some tables out so people can sit for a drink she alone and some time with girlfiends went there
>some times we talk when she was alone
>mfw i was 2 young and stupid
>mfw when i roll back the tape i realise that i probably had a big chance in fucking her if i was more discrete and persistent
i started fucking 6-8 months later she got preggo and we had new teacher some guy who was probably a pedo because was trying to feel girls from the class
I was planning on my senior prank be that at the last real school day for seniors we have an assembly with an electric overhead. So my plan was TeamViewer a computer to my phone. Log onto it. Access the overhead and start like playing porn or put CP or stupid shit. They fucking used an old ass overhead instead. I was pissed.
But school has tradition where seniors pelt all the kids going home with water ballons. I slugged my friends brothers girlfriend right in the tit on accident.
> 1998 high school computer lab
> instructor was doing a quick into to Netscape
> told the class to go to whitehouse.gov
> class of about 50, half didn't hear the instruction so I said the instructor said: whitehouse.com
> i knew it was a porn site
> at least 20 computers had porn displayed on it
> an eccentric English teacher happened to be in the class and started cracking up but didn't say anything
> students start browsing porn for a about 10 minutes before lab instructor realizes the problem
> lab instructor thought he said "whitehouse.com" by accident
> I was off the hook
>be in high school
>be in Idaho, where we compete with Mississippi for being worst at schools
>computer lab machines are IBM PS1 all-in-one deals that boot up from floppies
>spend English classes in there filling up my own personal 3.5 inch disc with sophomoric essays
>because I'm so far ahead of the rest of English class
>whenever an assignment is due whip out either a fresh essay or just turn in something from my disc
>printed out on tractor-feed printer
>which sounds like a piece of fucking farm equipment
>attendant was a pretty cool lady named Bobbi
>a little too old to be wearing that style of makeup but she's alright
>never asks me if I'm ditching class to type out highschool-boy brain puke
>one day tells me to quit goddamn turning off computers when I'm done with them because she has to.take the time to boot them up again
>quit going to computer lab for a while, thinking the computers will keep getting turned off, proving it wasn't me.
>Come back after two weeks
>bring her a few of her face chocolate bars
>"It quit happening! Thanks, Anon."
>fuck my life, it wasn't me
>let back into computer lab anyway because I'm not retarded and never need help with computer and because chocolate
>about 12 years old
>learn how to make a .bat file that would just open as many cmd's as times you would write 'start' on the file
>Make one in one computer we had for the whole class
>teachers used It everyday
>put the file in the desktop
>change It so It would appear to be Internet Explorer (yeah those days)
>teacher comes in
>It opens thousands of cmd windows since i copied that start over and over in the file
>he starts askings what was going on and so
>he was the teacher who knew most about computers and he was completely lost
>Some people saw me do it buy no one is telling shit
>feel bad because he was kinda cool and propose from the back of the class to reboot It
>Computer starts again normaly like nothing happened
>people were thinking that It was a virus and it was gone
>It was a fucking bat file and obviously i knew how to shut It down
>friend teaches me how to send messages via command prompt
>net send <ip address> message here
>fatfinger message to friend
>send random teacher "sup faggot"
>banned from computers for entire year
>mom thinks im a hacker
>In IT class
>about 25 machines in room
>2x4gb 1333mhz ddr3 in all
>easy open machines
>every lunch break for 2 weeks steal a couple of sticks of ram from computers
>have 20 sticks of 4gb at home under bed
>one day get horny fapping to pokemon rule 34
>grab first thing i can that goes in my ass
>stick another 4gb in
>don't stop til i get 64gb in my ass
>feel guilty after church that sunday
>spend three lunchtimes quickly slotting dirty ram back in to machines
>a few of them go bsod in next class
>i think "moar like bsodomy" and giggle to myself
>in 7th grade
>Windows XP days
>get bright idea to send a message
>we're both in computer lab
>i send "i love you femanon <3- anon"
>i assume it sends to her
> it sends throughout the school
>looks directly at me
>i try to laugh it off whilst trying to collect the spaghetti off the floor
>in 7th grade
>Windows XP days
>get bright idea to send a message
>we're both in computer lab
>i send "i love you femanon <3- anon"
>i assume it sends to her
> it sends throughout the school
>looks directly at me
>i try to laugh it off whilst trying to keep the spaghetti in my pockets
>>in 7th grade
>>Windows XP days
>>get bright idea to send a message
>>we're both in computer lab
>>i send "i love you femanon <3- anon"
>>i assume it sends to her
>> it sends throughout the school
>>looks directly at me
>>i try to laugh it off whilst trying to keep the spaghetti in my pockets
>At shitty school with all of 2 tech people and a total K-12 size of like 700 at most.
>Unplug Ethernet cable from back of desktop
>Plug the loose end back into an open wall jack
>About 5 minutes pass
>Network crashes across the entire school (not even shitting)
>Get out of that class early, no teachers can log on or anything, essentially do nothing for the last 2.5 hours of day while teachers bitch about not being able to access their accounts.
>One of my friends was a lacky for the head tech person, later tells me that the head tech person thought the network was being hacked and shut the entire thing down for over 4 hours until they figured out that it was a cable sending data back to the network
>Small town public school tech staff at its finest
>Our crappy school network had some basic built-in message system that was locked to students (outgoing) but faculty and staff could use it to send messages to students and each other
>When you got a message it popped up on your screen, old school warning box style
>Friend and I put together the teacher's password by watching her type it in a few times
>Figure out how to send to specific students by testing it on ourselves
>From there figure out how to message multiple people (we were, are still are, tards so this took awhile)
>Send message to nearly the entire grade "STOP PLAYING GAMES YOU LITTLE SHIT"
>So much laughter you could hear it coming from other rooms down the hall
>Teacher was FURIOUS
>They never figured out who sent it
>be in adv comp sci IV (late 90s)
>being a roody-poo with smtp via telnet
>fatty miss miss teacher comes up
>she leans over and lifts her glasses up off her nose
>fucking chained glassed /b/ros.. shit that wraps around your neck
>smell the generic deodorant from her tit-pits
>with the smell of Big Red gum escaping her voice she mutters
>after class.. me and you on the floor
>i waited.. class ended.. made sure to shut the door
>strut towards her then hear.... everybody do the dinosaur
>1st class of the day
>we were told to do some math with computers
>i go to 4chan to ask help
>teacher looks and notices dick on the screen
>>crack neighbours wifi (wep)
>>use a keylogger at school to get the admin password
>>get all the emails of all the teachers and students
>> use a random website that allows you to send emails and write your custom sender email
>> send a pic of a girl having a cock on her head with a title 'i am an unicorn' to everyone. Use the headmaster's email adress.
>>everyone thinks its the headmaster
>>he calls the cops
>> cops investigate during several months
>>catch me finally
>>spend a night in jail
>> had to change school
>> had to pay a lots of money
>> mfw was un the newspaper
since when is this ameritardistan american image board? by what deffinition? you sir are the most ameritarded of all ameritards
this is in no way like your lame tree metaphor but just for the record i can go into a forest and find a tree can't you?
> in high school, I was a TA for a computer lab
> had access to what seemed to be unlimited supply of brand new 386 computers (yes, shows my age)
> setup two systems on the X.25 network, access given through a university next door to high school
> setup a modem so I could dial up and access X.25 from home, free
> setup file sharing
> an audit discovers my setup
> I'm almost put on probation
> juvenile court delays probation on condition I graduate high school and get accepted to a university
> school district was mad at delayed punishment
> went to university
> no record
>me and friends chilling in dt department as usual
>no one goes there so can mess around and Shit
>computers are Shit, one was so old Windows 7 expired on it.
>anyway my friend turns on pc and loads bios
>one with no password
didn't know anything about computers in high school
> am like what are you doing
>starts he messing with setting
>pc starts making weird growing sound
> mfw find out he turned off the cooling fans
>come back and find computer gone
>couple years ago
>transfer student from Korea
>get qt white/Korean gf who translated most of my work
>she says i should take html as my elective
>new so I get to use the "good" PC
>windows 7, 8 gigs of ram, gtx 750ti
>html easy as shit
>spend 5 hours a week playing starcraft 2
>make a website by copying the element from some other kid
am mighty white for a sand nigger... guess again
[clue the mooselimbed canadian terror wrist thing is a joke] there are no ultranationalist candians of middle eastern descent or otherwise... try again ameritard