Holy fuck, haven't laughed like this in a while. Thanks anon
Alright got my laughs, gonna bump it with some from the folder i guess
On a related note, anyone lurking that saved the "11 pump man" saga from /trv/?
Think the thread was like a month ago or so
Nobody saved the 11 pump man saga? It had a bunch of parts, but i only got a couple.
I'll post those i guess, but it got way funnier
Reread it, I frickin love this story. Any follow ups?
Have you taken the brown pill yet, mateys?
it's a tough pill to swallow! The brown pill was founded in 1999 by Sir Reginald Brownpill, who presents and narrates the attached video.
Forget red and blue pills, brown pills are the way of the future.
Video related. Please leave your questions, comments, and concerns below about this radical new paradigm of thinking!
Swallow the brown pill today! Red pills are for fedora fucking wearing faggots, blue pills are for the ignorant masses. Ignore the other le epin /pol/ maymays, this one is the real deal...
librechan dot net slash brownpill slash src/1472569404687 dot mp4
Hey /b/, here's a story.
>be on trip to tropical part of my country
>trip is like my first time interstate on my own even though I'm in university
>hanging out on the beach
>be there with friend who's a big fat guy, no experience with girls
>I've been laid a few times
>feeling a bit shit on this holiday because I haven't talked to any chicks and haven't jacked off in forever
>friend is also not that outgoing, doesn't like trying new things if nobody else is doing it
>we chill on the beach for a bit
>there's a long bit of mudflats and the tide is at low but nobody is walking around there
>hear that there's usually crocodiles in this part of the country
>friend doesn't want to go out to the mudflats
>decide after a lot of bickering to go on my own
>as I'm walking halfway out there, olive skinned girl quite curvy girl is walking out there as well, figure I'll go talk to her
>she has nice big boobs and a butt that kind of sticks out awkwardly, face is average but hey
>have a shitty stubble beard at this point, wearing shit clothes, literally beyond the point of giving fucks
>start a conversation with no expectations at all
>"hey, you wanna walk further out with me?"
>"haha okay! where are you from yada yada"
>turns out she is from Brazil, here while studying
>we walk out and chat and stuff until we get to a point where suddenly the sand gives way under our feet
>sinking down to past the knee, we're completely covered in mud, trying not to sink any further
>fuck we're sinking, only way to get out is to grab each other by the shoulders
>pull her out by her armpits, get a face full of boob at one point
>she's laughing and struggling herself
>eventually pulls me out as well
>both covered everywhere in mud
>go back to beach, chill at the washing station and wash ourselves off
>make a point of washing her legs for her while I'm bent over, look up at her briefly, she doesn't mind and is smiling
>friend is watching with disbelief
>oh shit it's on
>we chill and introduce ourselves for a bit, have some water
>decide to all go back to the car I'd hired and chill
>car is actually a van, big section out the back you can sleep in
>friend is the best bro in the world and gets a hint
>"hey, there's some stuff I wanted to do in the city for the afternoon, you guys want to take the car yourselves?"
>aw shit nigga you the real og
>get in the van, ask her if she feels like driving into the rainforest
>she agrees, we chuck on some indie music and she smokes a cigarette
>make it up to a giant waterfall
>we're chilling out and having a good time, taking some pictures
>asks me to send them to her at some point - I never did
>balls up because of spending two weeks without whacking it and just kiss her for no reason
>she smiles and says in her Brazilian accent "that was really nice, do you want to go somewhere else?"
>get back to the car and we make out much harder, now I'm feeling her tits and lower back
>holy fuck these are amazing, biggest tits I've ever felt
>decide to just drive up to some random mountain path
>she's smiling and playing with her hair the whole way
>finally make it up to a path with a few tourists
>walk up further and make it to a fence with a sign saying no entry
>nobody is around
>decide fuck it, ask her if she wants to jump it
>she says yes with a glint in her eye
>we walk down out of view and I start making out with her hard, feeling her all over
>rub her pussy over her sun dress and she starts moaning
>she takes charge and unzips my pants
>don't want to sit or lie down as it's dirty in the rainforest, bugs everywhere
>she starts going to town on my cock
>the heat and humidity are making it hard for me to cum
>she looks up at me determinedly
>switches to just jacking me off
>damn this girl knows what she's doing
>cum all over some rainforest plant
And that was how I got my dick sucked in a rainforest. I went back to the car later on and fucked her when it was night-time in a quiet street in the back of the van.
Well fuck you. I felt like telling it.
>Watching some porn
>Trying to find my fetish
>Don't find anything that brings out my raw lust
>End up ejaculating to some Mia Malkova
>Goes on youtube
>I start watching Gordon Ramsay screaming in his show kitchen nightmares
(My hobby is watching his shows)
>After a while i get harder than I have ever been
>I start looking for some similar shows
>Only find short videos
>get diamonds over watching crazy people screaming at other people
>After some weeks I can only masterbait to this kinds of videos
>I srls think i have issues
>Watching porn is not the same anymore
>Only pornstar that can satisfy my lust for screaming people is Gianna Micheal
>I fcking hate my life
Holy Fucking Shit, this is gold. If you take nothing from this threat but 1 image click this one mother fuckers, long as fuck SO FUCKING WORTH
TL:DR doesnt exist, story written too well, Anon should fucking publish this bitch. I haven't read a story that fucking good in a few years.
>storytelling level easily over 9000
>mfw feel sad cause I noticed it was about Spongebob before the punchline kicked in
>my guts are yelling in German
I'm laughing so hard I think I got abs
Requesting the OP image from this
There was a girl that collected used condoms from her and put them all in the wall. Like..the wall was full with colored condoms with sperm.
Does anybody have the pics/related content?
That's so great to know! Especially since this is a anyonymoose imageboard.
Wasn't going to read it because it was long as shit, but looked at the comments from other anons and bit the bullet
Story's god tier, definitely satisfying.
This might be my favorite of all of the greentext stories I´ve red over my time here. Extremly funny and VERY well written. Plus the ending is just the perfect combination of fuck yeah & I-hope-she-died.
This is why I love /b/