What's something almost no one knows about you?
Your biggest secret?
My family members and I control your family members who control western society who control "anonymous"
i shove sharpies in my ass when i beat off. one time i used twizzlers
>sudden urge to please myself analy
>use lube stick finger.
>shove finger deeper
>4 inches in
>hit a new shit brewing
>texture of a clay, really solid
>bust and never jerk off again
Why did you delete this
"When I was 9 my cousin (who was a year older) tried things out on me. But the thing was I enjoyed it. Then when I was 10 during a family event where we had to spend the night I ended up with my cousin and my 4 year old cousin who was a boy. My older cousin and I are girls. I refused to do anything with my 4 yr old cousin and tried to fall asleep. I laid there while my older cousin did who knows what with him. I regret it to this day. I've never told anyone and I never plan to."
IM BI AND IM LONEY AND I HATE MOS PEOPLE AND I NEVER LOVED AND I WANT TO CRY
I'm a virgin. I think my family actually thinks I'm not and that one day I'll be the normal kid they thought they had and I'll give them kids and shit.
Legit, I think I was close to losing my v card recently but I'm not sure. Last week, I asked a girl I really liked out and she said sure. So we eat and thats eat. I see her at work and we chat but I don't push anything. A few days later I have her my number and told her to shoot me a text. It's been a couple of days now so I don't think she's interested. Oh well. I tried
Here is a monkey raping a parrot
cool. i think im bi too, atleast i enjoy some trap shit but usually return to female stuff fairly quickly. nobody knows.
naturally i hate most other people because i have a higher intelligence and all the downsides with understanding how retarded people actually are, but thats not a secret.
When I was like 6 or 7 I went to summer camp with a buddy of mine.
We all had our own disposable cameras, and we thought it would be hilarious to take pictures of ourselves butt naked.
They used my camera and snapped some pictures of me spreading my legs, showing my pecker and asshole and shit while laughing my ass off. It was all in good fun and nothing really came of it, it wasn't a sexual thing, we were pretty dumb and didn't know much about sex in general.
Later that day we recalled the event out loud, still laughing "oh boy this is gonna be hilarious when we pick up the photos at the chemist"; unfortunately, a camp counselor heard us and asked me to give up my camera.
He opened it up, rolled out the film and looked at the latest pictures and went "listen anon, I can't let you take this home, you did a bad thing, I wouldn't tell your parents if I were you".
I went back home the week after and never, ever brought the subject up again.
The thing is, I can't remember if other counselors were aware of this at the time, if they were they probably took it up to the camp manager or something.
Or maybe he was a pedo, kept the photos and jacked off.
>He opened it up, rolled out the film and looked at the latest pictures
Um...Anon, you cant exactly do that. Exposing raw untreated film to light destroys it and you cant see whats on them. You have to process the film before you can see the images.
I'm in love with one of my friends. But don't know how to confess because before meeting him I considered my self straight. I don't know if he is gay. He doesn't ever talk about Hot Chick or anything sexual really.
We work together and chill on the weekends at a another friends/college house. We have a small group of friends that always chill together. We both always crash on a couch (one of those corner couch) after getting baked/drunk. And I feel like if I confess my love to him and he freaks out that work and chilling would become to awkward as a after math.
You only live once. And nothing you do in that life matters more than you care to think.
Tell him you are GOING to fuck his ass and he is GOING to like it.
He clearly understood there were some naked pictures of me on the film, I distinctly remember seeing him rolling it out of the camera and observing them.
If it fucking the pictures up then good, I don't want to know someone somewhere has picture of me as a kid.
Well i confessed to my friend, turns out he was bicurious, we had sex ~4times and ended up fighting because of something else but it worked for me, didnt change our relation much.
>be 5 years old
>obsessed with old piano given to our family (near autism levels)
>learn to play by ear, analyze oscillations of strings and wood
>generally regarded as bright kid
>parents mentally, verbally, physically abusive
>off the charts for mental math in grade school
>heading toward jr. high, stop giving fucks about academia
>learn shit on the computer, become consumed with recording hardware and software
>start composing my own stupid electronic music at 14
>dad kicks me out for slipping grades, forge their signature to work at mickey d's
>pay $150 a month for a spare bedroom in someone's house
>barely graduate high school, small army of crappy electronic metal tracks is only focus
>get noticed for music songwriting skill right after high school, asked to join band that just signed to major label deal
>spend ages 18 - 25 making records, touring, obsessively learning from record production masters
>leave band due to disputes, construct man-cave and use connections to build libraries of license music that gets used by major television networks
>semi-retired at 32, lawyer-level passive income from all licenses out
>mfw no friends left
>mfw no family left
>mfw can't really relate to anyone, even other musicians
I could always play it as a joke when we chilling alone. But I don't think I'm really sexually attracted to him. Weird huh? He is only friend I have that never talks deep meaningful conversations with. All My friends send me like paragraph of text over chats and shit. And he like hardly reply to my messages.
>work at AON in the South Tower
>get to work at 8am
>coworker in a meeting
>North tower hit at 8:46
>chill for a minute, speakers telling everyone to stay in their office
>coworker and I start taking elevator down
>tell him I forgot my briefcase in the office
>start going back up, take the express elevator
>get to the sky lobby - floor 78
>says he'll get it for me and meet me in the lobby
>take express elevator back down to lobby
>he went to get my briefcase on the 103rd floor
>plane took out 78-84th floor
>clearly my fault
I still feel bad about it to this day.
His name was Paul Beatini.
I'm so sorry.
I presume other people are better than me or have something that I don't. I imagine a scenario in my head where I'm at the grocery store and some guy is really aggressive. I haven't really been in such a situation before.
I over-analyze like a motherfucker. I feel like I can't think of something clever, insightful or funny to post on the internet. Then I read in the comment section where people posted something I missed in the video and I beat myself up over it. I analyze a lot but at the same time don't. It's annoying.
Sorry for ranting. Feels a bit good letting it all out. Ironically I wish anyone reading this can give me some answers. What is my problem? How can I fix it? Is there anyone else thinking like myself?
there is no life draining from the eyes you fucking retard
also you'll likely be the one dying if you attempt that shit.
>hurr durr i just gotta slash and then dey dieds, cuase im dat powurfull and indestruktable
How are you like drunk. I'm similar to you I over analyze everything. But when I'm drunk I'm a complete cunt to everyone putting everyone faults on the table. I piss people off so much to the point were people want to kill me.
i had the same problem as you. only solution i found was to build confidence through exercise and positive thinking. it is hard to do but once you have some self respect most of these brain issues go away
Haha yeah probs. but it never happened so who gives a shit? Been trying to figure out what my problem is for years but all i've found is that mild childhood trauma caused me to feel a sense of powerlessness hence me being aggressive. Lifes pretty good right now though so no need to be a hero
I still pretend in the same fantasy world from when I was 7 years old. I'm 21 almost 22 now.
Imagined huge space battles versus giant tree cities in elementary and middle school, imagined it after school when I turned thirteen, there is a huge plot that has spanned over fourteen years (over sixty in the story). It would take eight or nine posts just to greentext the BAREST outline of this plot. It's not particularly fascinating. But this story has given me incredible feels over the years. I deeply miss some of the characters who have died.
Pic related, I was driving along a highway in Florida and imagined the main character (grandson of the original main character) flying toward the enemy's massive city of billions, watching the orange haze of the city. In reality I was just watching the streetlights across the bay, but imagining it as so much larger and sinister felt amazing, especially with music. I am happy I can still get lost in this story after so long.
I took the last poptarts out of the box and put the empty box back in the pantry.
that's it. but believing that something is inherently wrong with you only contributes to it. workout and go accomplish something to build self esteem. also don't stress over things you don't have control over. believe me i wish someone would have told me this a year ago when i was suicidal
That I've kept a secret for over ten years
my friend is gay
you see, it started quite a bit ago, when I was still a kid
my friend would post has "OP" on a site called 4chan on their b board
and shortly thereafter he had a bunch of hairy men come over to get sucked off in the dozens daily
it's only gotten worse has time's gone on, and I'm afraid he's gotten and spread aids far and wide
I don't see any recovery for him
I go out to parties, pubs, strip clubs with my friends hoping to get into an altercation that results in me beating someone to death in "self defense". I act very protective of my friends when we are out, they think I'm a great friend, a stand up guy. But really I just want to beat the life out of someone and get away with it.
Nice quints. Say more about this? I think I will be in your shoes someday. I don't see this ever ending.
Thanks man. I've written about 300,000 words so far, but it's very fragmented and spread out over the timeline. I'm working on linking it up, but I get writer's block a lot.
What do you do?
I'm actually a wicked normalfag millennial who comes here to vent his deep inner disgust with humanity and general hatred for the people around him.
I am not mentally able to get attached to anyone.
I don't have feelings.
but I pretend like I do.
Well, it started as a dream i had when i was a kid, i was a knight who stumbled onto a big mystery which i wont elaborate on because i plan to try to market it as a story for a movie, but its become a big, BIG world, on the level of Game of Thrones big, since i was a teenager various adventures, thousands of characters, locations ect have become very flushed out, i have some of it written, others not yet.
you couldn't look at the raw pictures in a film camera before you got the film developed
which brings me to believe you weren't around when film cameras were still popular, which means you are too young to be here
Not diagnosed. I have taken some online autism tests and always got borderline but just below.
I have a tumblr full of my autism, mostly because it was the only blogging platform I found easy to use. I just post, though, I don't atke part in the site's culture.
Here's a character infographic I am working on. The races in the story have pretty autistic names (I called them "whos" and "lice" when I was 7, after headlice and Dr Seuss creatures, and never bothered to change the names) but other than that I am somewhat proud of it. It is pretty generic sci-fi fantasy though.
My biggest secret is that I want to be completely dominated and controlled by a female.
I want her to punch, kick, and knee my testicles.
I want her to piss all over my face and body.
I want her to spit in my face.
I want her to degrade me verbally.
I want her to fart in my face and force me to worship her ass.
I want her to force me to suck, lick, kiss and massage her feet.
I want her to lock me in chastity so I can watch her suck a fat, uncut black cock.
my biggest secret is that I am addicted to computer games, only my family knows that something's up but I still achieved somewhat better than them so they let me be. If only I weren't addicted, even sky wouldn't be the limit...
When i was 6 i had an old guy in a swimming pool pull my shorts down and make a comment with a smile on his face while his gf laughed. Didnt get shit. Just grabbed my ass, looked at my lil willy and smiled. Didnt realise what actually happened until i had a flashback when i was like 14
Just text her you faggot.
Get over your stupid bitchbutterflies. If that doesnt work go for self-conscious chicks or fat chicks. Its what you do to learn how to fuck and what girls like and how to manipulate them.
Trust me, your boner´s gonna work despite them being chubby ugly migets.
I've been imagining a fantasy world in my head as well over the years (from when I was in 8th grade), it was mostly just a habit of mine but I have been trying to flesh out lately.
But I think your premise has got a lot of promise, have you considered getting it to the publishing stage or naw?
it involves a lot of sorcery and violence, the main character is something of a chosen one, who began as purely a knight but over time learned elemental magic and resembles more of a battlemage, he joined a rebellion and eventually became a king, now his kingdom is at war with a long-latent evil
My dad tried that when I was 11. I stopped going when I was 12 and I've rejected Christianity after seeing the delusions firsthand. Seriously it's fucked. Might have just been that church but I don't see myself going back
I started to lucid dream when I was around 13 now 23. I created my own universes I had 2.
First One was me struck in a fantasy magic vs technology world. There were 2 side of the world technology and magic side. I would wake in the dream and had the ability to manipulate everything. The technology side of the world were killing culling mass amounts of magic users looking for people that had the ability to create Pure Power that was turned into fuel that powered there technology making them strong. And my whole role was to find why they were attacking and bring peace.
Same. Raised a Christian, i do still believe in an infinate being that is the Creator coz fuck why not? But religion is just a manipulative buisness that tries to make you feel guilty and pay a guy for telling you how shit you are. Then you sing praises. I don't see myself ever being a part of a religion
Not really, my plan is to finish it and leave it behind when I die, like Henry Darger. He was my inspiration to really do something with this story. I feel like publishing it would mean I'd have to end the story and it's such a habit, it's something I always went to when I was bored, just imagining generic space battles. My mom would drag me with her shopping at the mall and I'd wander around imagining fighters swarming through this massive fortress blowing things up.
i dont know i guess im pretty open about myself, but if i had to say something......
not everyone know i like bondage and hc stuff, only my exgfs know
i think just one person knows i am a little bit agoraphobic, thats why almost never go out to eat, i tell lies to most persons so i dont have to go
just one person knows how "depressive" i can get sometimes
I know that the poster below me has a very dark secret...
Except I'm not ashamed at all.
Simply because I feel I could get away with it.
Upbringing was fine, no abuse, not incredibly rich but we'll enough off. Made 105k last year (prob slightly less this year). Wife, 2 kids, friends... some depression that comes and goes.
Me too, anon. Me too. Think about it all the time, esp. if someone rear ends me after tailgating him. Want to bait him into attacking me then shoot him. WTF is wrong with me.....
I have no idea how to clean my asshole area. I use wet wipes and it helps I guess, but just shoving my hand between my cheeks grosses me out and keeping an ass rag in the shower is even grosser.
If I don't drink too much I'm fine but it's a fine line of being open and have self esteem and me being a cunt to everyone. I have found that if I drop mdma I'm open and have self esteem. But it's probably if I find a true girl friend with a serious relationship. I would be more open and shit
I wish I could lucid dream. Any tips? I've tried before but I feel like I keep ruining it. Is it like that hypnosis thing where you have to be willing to lose your balance and have someone catch you?
No problem. I hope you enjoy browsing it. The /intro page has the story written out in long summary. Resources tab has my google drive with a PDF of my manuscript.
So just for the challenge? Huh... I thought everyone who wants to kill like me had something wrong with them... Oh well guess not. You think you'd feel guilty or regret it? I just dont see how a 'normal' person could kill without emotion
i've been stalking this girl for almost a year. i know what times she gets which buses/trains at. which bars she frequents most regularly. where she lives. where several members of her family lives. and i sometimes go to bus stops where she'll be and just look at her. she doesn't know i exist.
I stop doing it I started to have problems like the wife in interception. I couldn't figure out what was real or not. Its amazing how much you keep locked up in you subconscious. For example I would lucid dream go to pplace I would go in the real would and could recollect tree lays and grass leaves. That I dreamt about in the real world and not just how it looked but the smell and fell of something I never felt or smelt before
Fuck man. Same here. Both of these things work terribly together. Wake up hung over after being a huge ass hole then spend the next weak freaking out about it. I hate myself
Had a drunken fight him the night before and i didnt live anywhere near the area and he seemed to just be a drug addict passing through. After the fight i stalked him back to where he slept. The next night a got rubber gloves and i knew where to get a sharp knife. So i just wanted to kill him to see what would happen...
I could go all night about my amazing parents or my perfect childhood but could be fucked telling a life story
I have learned that people in general are not really on my intelligence level. They are like sheep walking through a haze. I resent them for their folly and feel no empathy towards my fellow man. My I.Q is over 150 how could they deal with my intellect? I don't talk to farm animals either.
You see, I am a psychopath. I don't care about the conformities of the modern world or the people in it. I am dull to the pain of others and feel nothing for humankind.
My mother is worried about me sometimes, my parents tried to get me tested for autism due to my lack of responsiveness in social situations but they don't realise that they are just beneath me and that I have ascended to a higher plane of existence. My older brother just finished getting his medical degree and is getting married in the fall. My mother and father seem so happy to see him and i think they had hoped I would also enter higher education but there is no reason.
I am too smart for the system. I will make my own forge soon and become a blacksmith and make knives and swords to sell online whilst I watch this pathetic excuse of humanity from the shadows. I will laugh only at the chaos
> Its amazing how much you keep locked up in you subconscious.
I agree. Another of my writing projects is to try to get some of the stuff in my dreams (like extra rooms in my house and what not) into some "battling inner demons in your dreams" sort of thing.
It'd be like inception, but with some guy having to kill the subconscious representation of his abusive father / ex-girlfriend by fighting some demonic version of them.
The imagery in dreams is amazing. I've had very few dreams about my story, but usually when I do it sends the plot wildly off track and I wake up in a panic that I've "ruined" it.
That's because clearly I'm not "normal". I don't think I'd feel regret. And I don't even know if it'd be for the challenge. The only way I'd fear getting caught is because I'd probably save newspaper clips, so the families knew who, if I had eventually gotten caught. Somebody stumbling upon thathe would be no good.
One Time I got Black out drunk I was bening a complete cunt. I was letting people try and knock me out for shits and giggles. I was aggravating the people while I did it. I woke up the next day with 2 Black eyes and a fucking sore jaw and my best friend told me the next day that I took 20+ punches to the face and wouldn't go down or even flinched and would piss the person off for trying
Could be. But I see "Those with antisocial personality disorder are often impulsive and reckless, failing to consider or disregarding the consequences of their actions"
I would hardly say I'm impulsive and definitely not reckless. Calculating and cold, perhaps. And I hardly feel "anti-social"
Me and my sister used to make out a couple of times when we were younger. Stopped when she started to feel uncomfortable. I also got scared parents might find out. Obviously no one knows.
I'm asexual but I don't think it makes me better than anyone, in fact I think it makes me worse since I literally have no desire to do what humans are supposed to do (fuck and have kids)
I have the problem were I want to write down everything but end up getting embarrassed that people think I'm weird. The only time I have posted anything about it is here. I have much much more story and timelines and everything about the universe.
i have a youtube channel where i make daily vlogs wherein i talk about how i feel about things. the contents are too personal to ever share with anyone i know. if they find out about it it could ruin me
Yeah i get the same way. Everything i do is planned, plotted and for a reason. Like i almost failed school and after i smashed an aptitude test a teacher asked me how i could possibly fail her subject with the level of understanding that i had and i replied 'i dont work unless i get paid' but that's not resisting authority or being an anarchist, its just knowing whats best for me and doing what i have to do to get what i want and no more so i dunno
I don't have her number; I gave her mine (i know, mistake). Regardless, it wasn't about getting pussy. I am more interested in a relationship.
Call me a faggot but I want to try and not be alone at least once before I die.
Mine is pretty weird / autistic / childish, too. I took me a long time to get the courage to share it, and it was ignored the first couple times. Keep at it, anon. Create for yourself, and if people like it when you share it, good. If not, as long as you enjoy it, that is reason enough for it to exist.
Im 12 and a half and just hit puberty. My friend who just turned 12 was watching porn and he produced sperm, i watch porn sometimes. yet nothing. Do i have any sperm at all? Is they only way to get it out by sex? please help
I had a 3.48 overall GPA in high school, went Marines instead of college but not a big "ooh-rah" moto jarhead, just did my time and got out.
Hate the animal abuse threads on here. Just feel like I could get away with shit so easy. Although I must admit, it'd be much easier if it were 60's-80's.
Just don't taunt the police (Zodiac) don't have a "type" don't have any sort of calling, random victims. Profiling is what gets you caught.
Funny that , made my own evolving multiverse 27 years ago. It's starting to fade now as I'm getting older .
It used to be in vivid color but now it's fading. .
I think its , what I call ' dimensional bleeding' where I'm viewing another me's life in some sort of parrell multiverse.
Or hopefully a future me in another life
I've got one where the outcome is so bizarre (something that happened to an ex) that she could be fairly easily identified. I probably wouldn't have to worry too much about my PI though; she had a lot of boyfriends.
Regardless, she's fine last I heard, but there's not much chance I'll ever see or hear from her again.
That's sad, anon. I hope you can find a way to preserve it.
> I think its , what I call ' dimensional bleeding' where I'm viewing another me's life in some sort of parrell multiverse.
Might just be memories fading?
Picture? It doesn't bother me much. I like to imagine my grandpa posts on 4chan somewhere.
I've been doing the same ever since I was in first grade, and its been progressing and maturing with me as I've grown up. It used to be such an innocent fantasy world where people had dbz-esque powers, but over time it developed into so much more. I used to spend alot more time alone just using my imagination and creating this universe but since I've graduated highschool, its a rare occurence.
Do you have any material written out for it?
> since I've graduated highschool, its a rare occurence.
I know how you feel. Now that I have a job I have difficulty getting into it anymore, except when I go on a long walk. Though, maybe that's a good thing. I've taken breaks frmo it before and always got back into it. Gives me time to catch up with my writing.
I haven't really given it thought to be honest. I don't have a favorite. A scenario where somebody hands me a gun and says "you shoot one, or I'll shoot both" I can't even contemplate which. (Besides the obvious of trying to shoot him, this is theoretical)
I feel like writing it all done but then sit there at a blank screen with writers block or something it been so long since I began I can hardly remember the start.
My second dream is me effecting me in another life. Its in the future where i a future me is having problems and I help him by me effecting things like making him teleporting and time travel and shit.
I'd love to have a daughter, i think i could raise a daughter really well but i couldnt stand having a son. If he grew up to be anything like me i'd hate him. If he grew up to be not as strong or tough or successful as me i'd hate him. And if he grew up to think he was better than me i'd kill him. So yeah if ever have kids lets hope their girls.
I think we're the same level of bi. I probably won't ever do it but I think I'd probably fool around with the right person if the stars aligned.
Also, I have the higher intelligence problem too. I often feel like I'm the only sentient, non purely instinctual person within miles.
me and my next door neigbor who was a few years older than me sucked eachothers flacid dicks since we were both too young to get hard. he was older than me and talked me into doing it. I still remember the taste, then i did it with the other neighbor boy and his parents found out. social services investigated me and I lied like none other. they left, the neighbors moved, and i told myself Id take this to the grave
I am a productive member of a society, soon to get married, but secretly I hate my life, the choices I was forced to made because I am too weak to stand up for myself, and I would like to fuck it all and go live a hippie rastafari lifestyle like a complete savage, just travel around, do drugs and fuck random cuties on music festivals until I would die from a drug overdose or some STD, because thats the only time I feel really alive and good.
i fell in love with a girl and i got really jealous so i found out her snapchat password and screenshotted all of her chats and photos. never spoke to her again and i think she knows.
Depends what part your in. I got in the front line part of ours which would get similar jobs to US infantry. Not much of it gets deployed and i'm gonna be earning around $60,000 a year. The men in the army are son of the toughest men you'll find in any military but our politicians are fucking wimps that never deploy anyone but SF because their scared they'll get PTSD and a lot do but i say tose ones are weak and shouldnt have enlisted.
I've tried writing it down once, but at that point I was in 8th grade and so it was shit-quality and I stopped. I'm planning on actually writing it all down soon before I start to forget some of it. Its not something that will be easily forgotten though, they're practically memories at this point. I used to draw out alot of important moments in the universe but lost the drawings a while back
Do it. You have the power to change your life at any moment. There is no God, there is no Hell. The only time we have is now. Fuck conventional rules, do what makes you happy.
47 when i was 21 he had strong arms and handled me really well
Now i keep my bf's under 40 and i am 28 now
Never done roleplay like that not interested in it too.
Sometimes i wonder about ways to get in touch with my s.dad. You think i should do that? Ive never spoken about this before
If they seem like geniuses its probably a good sign their assburgers so probably gonna fine. Just dont do what my parents did and turn on them everytime a teacher or someone else says their not good enough. Cant wait for my mothers funeral, gonna have a ball on that podium