You've read my greentexts. Odds are, anyway. I'm a writer by trade, and every now and then when I get bored I'll write out a long elaborate greentext, some good story for one type of thread or the other, usually feels or erotic threads, and it's all lies, of course.
It's rare that I scroll through a "best of 4chan" or wincest or feels thread and don't see at least one of my greentexts posted.
I enjoy sex for the sole purpose of procreation after a good massage and a foreplay, but we do it under the bedsheets, clothed with the lights turned off, only the beautiful light of the blue moon lightens the room as we have passionate and happy sex and both of us climax at the same time, and after we're done we kiss each other and have pillow talk about the name of our son or daughter and then sleep hugging each other, face to face.
And this is done after we marry and our marriage has the aproval of both of our families, as both of us are known as being loyal and will never break our word, which means no cuckoldry! Oh and we will NEVER have unprotected sex or anal sex, oral sex is a maybe but only if we are both clean and shaved, groping might be allowed but not in front of the children though! Kisses on the cheeks and lips if we're on private. I as the groom will keep a good shape, work hard and be there for when my family needs me, and my wife will be kind and pretty with the children but she will also teach them to work hard and never play foul. BUT WAIT, we also practise self-defense, for there are people who sadly cannot understand our perspective of the world and would stain our clean relationship. We will never cause harm unless its by self-defense and absolutely necessary
I'll tell you why I don't eat taco's in public anymore.. >Get invited to a taco place by grill >Date asks me how I like the food >Take one bite of the taco and it falls apart all over my lap >She sighs and says "I'll go get some napkins" >See her walk right past the napkin counter >Out of the restaurant and into her car >Drives off
There is no such thing as fully automated customer service. What you think is the automated system is some poor fucker who failed at directly talking to the customer so he has to listen and silently push the buttons.
>>701321942 sometimes, when im in line for the grocery store i pretend that im looking at candybars to buy. but i'm actually squeezing the fuck out of them in hopes that someone will pick it up and take it home, and when they open it, it will be misshapen as hell
One time in college I got drunk in a friend's room. I went to the dorm bathroom because I felt sick. Went in stall and didn't feel sick anymore. Realizing how horny I was I jacked off onto the toilet seat. I did not clean up. Upon exiting I realized I was in the women's room.
>>701321942 >be me >23 >Decide to go out for a drive in my car, late night cruise. >friend texts me, "come out anon to said bar" kk >Get to bar, friends a plenty, drink just enough to feel it. >time to go home. >feelingoodman.png, cruisin minding own business >Lights appear behind me, comin quick >jerk overpasses me >cuts me off, clips front of my car, spin out. >fuck, fuck been drinking. >cops come, bust me. can't get out of this one, fail tests, judge throws book at me. 1 yr suspension, insurance skyrocket for min 5 years. Car is totaled, sell it for scrap. >own another vehicle. >gotta survive. Drive without license for 2 years, no insurance for 6 years, get off scott free. >daily drive throughout the whole thing. >MFW I beat the system.
I want to rape a girl that is a closet nymphomaniac, stuck with a vanilla beta boy person that pays bills. I want to aggressively take her as she slowly realizes this is the best dick she's ever had. She then gives in and becomes my little whore for 3hours. Would prefer either asian or dominican. A perverted man can dream, can't he?
>>701327995 Yeah, we were friends for some 6 months, ended up pretty close, I eventually told her, she didn't return.
Few years later and we're still kinda friends, but we're not close. Not really subjecting myself to bs, I don't have any romantic interest in who she's become. I'm glad it didn't get awkward in retrospect. It's the feelings that I miss, she used to drive me nuts, now she just doesnt.
>>701329036 Had a dashcam, cops watched it. Felt bad for me and only gave me a care and control charge. Plead no contest, and got a pardon 3 years after. Beat system then too. Point is, I beat the insurance companys. fucking blood suckers.
I like to poop just before taking a shower and instead of wiping, I spray the shower nozzle up my ass to clean it off, then spray the bits of crap that come out with the jet to break it up before pushing it down the drain. I wish I had a bidet.
>>701321942 My dog is the only reason I haven't killed myself yet. I honestly don't give a fuck how my family would feel about it. But the thought of leaving the dog is what's stopping me from doing it
My ex-girlfriend was really into dogs and talked about how when she was depressed as a teenager, she felt like they were the only ones who understood her. Sometimes I jack off to the idea that she also fucked her dogs.
I'm a habitual snoop. If you leave your computer unguarded around me, I will find your unsecured saved passwords in your browser, read your e-mail, etc. I even wrote a keylogging program that will e-mail me someone's key strokes, though I haven't gotten around to installing it on anyone's computer yet.
I almost became a high school teacher a few years ago. When I was student teaching, the only thing that made my day worthwhile was when I'd go home and stalk the Facebook pages of my cute female students and jack off to them.
My niece had her 11th bday recently so I took her and some friends to the mall and told her I'd buy her w/e she wanted for $300ish. I ended up buying her $250 of stuff from victoria's secret. Felt kinda creepy but w/e.
I'm still in love with a girl from high school. She knows this and uses it to get money out of me. Occasionally she'll send a tit pic or two. I'm currently trying to stop this so I don't talk to her, for now
>>701331024 You aren't alone, anon. I do the same shit. One of my friends accidently typed his password in his username box once while i was hanging out with him, i used it to get into his email account, gmail, everything. I know literally everything he looks up now.
>>701330490 You'd be surprised. My ex was way out of my league. The only reason we started dating was because we worked together. She probably wouldn't have even acknowledged me if I tried to approach her at a bar. We were together for 3 years
>>701331473 Whilst I havn't been overly damaged by it emotionally or anything it fucking hurt both times. I'm 18 now and am actually less sexually active then I have been in a long time but am totally okay with being fucked now. But getting a dick shoved into your ass for the first time is always gonna hurt, Especially when the only lube they used was spitting in my asshole.
>>701331452 i did this with an ex gf a while ago, jacked off to her sex tales and private pics for years! her best friend was studying abroad so they would exchange daily emails (this was before they had facebook) and they were VERY detailed. i know all about the "handjob summer", Laura
>>701332553 Same here. Unfortunately my ex wasn't nearly as interesting in private. The best I ever found were a couple of sex chats between two friends and their S.O.s.
Oh, I just remembered, before Facebook switched to using https by default, I used FireSheep (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Firesheep) a few times to hijack people's Facebook sessions at coffee shops and found a few good exchanges. I also used one girl's account to ask her friend if she wanted to have a threesome with a frat dude and the friend replied that she didn't want to because she had just lost her virginity but said that having asked wouldn't make things weird between them or anything.
>>701332660 Geeze, I thought I was the only one. "Oh, I can't go, I have to let me dog out." "I really want to stay, but I have to go let the dog out." "Yeah, I can't go out of town, I need to stay and watch the dog." "My 75lb dog is afraid of thunder. It's cool if he gets into bed and sleeps between us and makes the whole place smell like wet dog because he was just outside in the back yard walking around in his own shit while it started raining, right?"
Ugh. I guess they're okay if they belong to other people (not including people I'm dating) and I have no responsibility for them.
>>701333435 they are like retarded children that will need special help all of their lives. I grew up with dogs, lots of dogs and they were cool but too much fucking work. my mom and showed and bred them still does. I loved college, didnt have to worry about any animals, could do w/e i wanted when i wanted. past 5 years ive lived with my sister and her husband, is a good setup excpet they have 3 dogs and im always the one who has to take them to the groomer, vet, etc because they are always working. at least it made me realize how lazy i am and how i really dont want to be a father
>>701332553 >>701333050 You guys got any other methods for gaining access to accounts? I've gotten REALLY good art social engineering passwords because a lot of people are dumb and choose super easy security questions, but thats about all I know how to do.
I'm leaving my bf of 10months in a few weeks. Planning on going ghost entirely and living with my sister a few states away. My bf has fallen in love with me so quickly. His brother just an hero and he's going through so much. I'm a deserter tgough, I haven't kept anything good ever. He's my first real relationship. It's going to wreck him. He'll move on.
>>701335770 I doubt it, his bro had mental illness and made several serious attempts. My is in bereavement yeah but he's got a solid head on his shoulders, he'll manage coping. >>701335953 Self hatred, don't believe in love. He wants to marry me. Fear. I never had a real relationship before him, it's been weird so far. Now with all the grief and trauma, realize I can't do relationships. Idk though tbh I just feel panicked.
>>701336263 Nope. I only did that a few times though, so I didn't have much of a sample size. I did find one girl talking about how she fucked her boyfriend in her dorm room while her roommate was sleeping on the top bunk of their bed.
>>701336393 I don't know. She really wasn't very sexual when I dated her, so I feel like it could go either way: she's either just not into sex at all or, as I like to imagine, she's really into fucking dogs.
When I was like 12 or 13, I used to go to the waterpark and grope girls in the wavepool. I could put my fingers in a girl's crotch as the wave came by and she didn't know who did it. Dammit now I'm hard thinking about that.
>>701337977 I was a camp counselor in training when I was 15, working with kids about 7 or 8. When we'd go to the pool, some of the girls would want to roughhouse with me and when I'd pick them up, I'd position my finger other their pussies and rub them while tossing them about. Sometimes I'd get my foot between their legs and they'd rub themselves on me.
>>701338321 I have the same fetish. I told my ex about it and she thought it was really hot. We were really into dirty talk, so she would make up scenarios where I'd be fucking an older woman and calling her mom while she watched us and touched herself. I'm now with a new girl who is waaay better balanced, but I'm worried about telling her, since she doesn't seem like as much of a sexual freak as my ex.
I contributed to the murder of a man for a debt of money and ketamine. Don't feel remorse; however, I know I could have stopped it. People choose their paths and death is an inevitable part of all paths.
>>701321942 I become very jealous when my twin be-friends someone else, especially a male. Where meant to be together. This is they I reject anyone whoever come close to him. Hi my brother/lover/kisser.
>>701339805 It all started when I was telling her about when I had hooked up with this woman who was 15 years older than me. She really got off on hearing explicit details of when I fucked other women, so I told her about how when I was fucking her, I called her mom under my breath.
>>701336589 At the very least you should tell him why you're breaking up. Even if it's via voice mail or text and you never speak to him again after that. Anything is better than ghosting a serious relationship.
When I was 31, I had just made detective. We'd just gotten a call about a local crime scene, so me and my partner headed over to check it out. Some guy had gone crazy and killed his whole family, and I'm not talking a few family members, this guy killed his wife's parents, his parents, his kids, her kids, her, and all 3 of the family pets as well as everyone in the homes on both of the streets his house sat on the corner of. Turns out it was a drug cartel thing and these people decided to cut this one family member out, and he just went crazy. Anyways, the secret is I kept ten grand from one of the neighbor's houses.
>>701338735 >>701338321 I have a fetish for wedgies and give myself wedgies somewhat often. There's actually a community and decent content for it, but I'd be pretty ashamed if anyone who knew me actually knew. Aside from an SO who'd be into it. Mother son stuff is probably still more common
I don't like being in this relationship anymore. I'm mostly attached to her because I don't have any friends and I'm too afraid of being completely alone. When we have sex, I hardly orgasm. I still think she's pretty and she's a great person, but it's killing me to continue with her. I'm too afraid I won't find anyone who takes care of me as much as she does. But the problem is, she loves me way more than I love her. I just can't anymore.
I'm one the few guys who likes to wear tighty whities, makes me alittle insecure when I wear them at work even though they wouldent know anyway because it's underwear and they can't see it but I love briefs so much
>>701341458 Then break up with her you stupid pussy. If you're having that thought, chances are shit aint been going good for a while and dudes like you are the reason women like her take so fuckin long to get where they're going. If it's not for forever then all you're doing is wasting her time, be a man and go fuck your hand.
>>701341839 Then stop being in the same fucking halls you retard. Also, what kind of bitch shit is that? You do realize that men aren't supposed to be this emotional right? If you're not together anymore, either she fucked up or you did. Doesn't matter who, just matters that you understand it needed to end and move the fuck on.
>>701341921 Yeah, but if you live with other people maybe wipe first so you dont get shit on the floor of the shower you ignorant swine. Your whole body has pores, even your feet numb nuts, if you're shitting on the shower floor, then stepping in that spot once the shit has been (seemingly) washed away you could be stepping in traces of your own feces. That's not good. Prolly not horrible. But not good.
>>701340808 Look, you know the guy more than me. Maybe he can handle it, maybe he cant. But if his brother just offed himself, the least you could give him is a two sentence text. A minute or two of painful writing, and bam, you're done for good.
>>701342709 Soooo.....you're stupid....and you want other people to not mind that their little amount of trust in you.....is stupid.....because you should never trust someone who's stupid.... because they're stupid?
When they stay at my house I let my nephews shower with me and my gf. their parents are conservative jesusfags who shelter them from reality. Pretty sure she is only girl they've seen naked irl, possibly even at all
>>701321942 My parents are really liberal and when I reached puberty they encouraged me to explore my sexuality with them. They did this for my siblings as well and now our family have a strong sexual relationship with one another.
Been with my gf for about ten months now, she changed. Went from shy, melancholic cutie with long hair and kinda emo style to a pseudofeministic tumblr normie with short hair and mommy issues. I'm more disgusted by her every time we meet.
>>701321942 >I've scabies since 10 years and become pedophile since the last 5 years during the time unable to bond with people in a social live and beyond that would love to fuck my mother which is unfortunately dead since I'm 14. Today it wouldn't matter to me if I could fuck my step mother if I only could call her mother while I can fuck her ejaculate in her womb and keep eye contact. And dame I got a boner during the time I wrote this and imagined it. Wouldn't have a problem to abuse our future childs in order to mate with them and breed it even further. The circle of live you know.
>>701343956 Well I live in a pretty liberal household that emphasized heavily on the freedom to learn and explore. When I reached puberty my parents promptly gave me the birds and the bees talk and willingly showed me their own body parts to learn about anatomy and sex. At that time they even offered to help me with any needs or urges I couldn't take care off. They kept encouraging me to explore and learn so I took their offered and they taught me almost everything about sex. By the time I was 16 I had even lost my virginity to my own brother.
>>701321942 >be me beta white guy 21 >attend college >Get into cuck porn b4 i eventually got redpilled >while in cuck phase meet qt at university >she shows some interest in me too beta to respond >go occasionally out with her and friends to a bar >always awkward for me >eventually a random black guy asks if she is my gf >i say no..he proceeds to dance with her >i get diamonds as i am a cuck >realize he may bone her >i pay for their drinks like a cuck, and drive them to my place "closer than her apt" >basically sit back drunk in the other room as they fuck on my bed >next day she apologozes i say its ok, offer to let her do it again >literally let her sleep with 3 more random guys from the bar in my bed over the course of the next year.
I never told any1 that part of my life, i was doing drugs too, now im red pilled and regret every moment.
>>701323101 I have to admit, if what you are saying is true, you would be real amazing. Have to think it's a copypaste, so I'm going to copy it. If it's your desire, I'm glad, your work must be shown. If it's all just a theory, I'm aslo glad because of the same thing nigger
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