people stop all practices, this company is shut down for debt, i am an official debt collector, here is my license
TURN DOWN THE AIR CONDITION YOU SEXIST PIGS!
I am a strong and independent woman and I'm freezing in my shoulder free, paper-think blouse over here! This is what sexism look like, so problematic.
Suck my dick faggots! I got weekend early this week!
i heard i was being called, i have an enormous ear infection now, what's going on?
You cant be the collector... because i am the collector
get the fuck out you freak, now my ear infection is really kicking in!
what's the problem chef?
Hello Anon, whats happening? Ummm, I'm gonna need you to go ahead come in tomorrow. So if you could be here around 9 that would be great, mmmk... oh oh! and I almost forgot ahh, I'm also gonna need you to go ahead and come in on Sunday too, kay. We ahh lost some people this week and ah, we sorta need to play catch up.
I AM NOT A FUCKING SCAM THIS IS NOT A FUCKING SCAM STOP NOW YOU FUCKING NIGGER
fuck you carl you might be my boss but i fucking quit FUCK YOU BYE MOTHERFUCKERS!!!!!!!!
Dicks out for Harambe, homos.
I don't know who Semen is, but I'm eating your yogurt.
Hello, this is vault-tec calling! I have come here today to tell you that you all have been pre-selected into the local vault!
Alright everyone, I've brought the munchkins. Now, I only have two boxes, so only about three munchkins each. And please use the napkins, I can't stress that enough. If you drop one, I cannot allow you to get another.
Oh, Stevie. Good, I need you to fix my email. I mean, I can probably figure it out, but I want to go take another swing at getting Stacey in Accounting back to my place. You know what I mean, sport? 'Course you don't.
Goddammit, Helen. You always get what you want, don't you? Even quads.
Got dammit corey stop eating all the pork rolls
Go do it yourself Jim, THE LUNCH ROOM IS RIGHT NEXT DOOR GODAMMIT
I got it myself, thanks
You could have had 3, but Helen came and took 5.
>If Jack has 30 donut holes to distribute among 12 coworkers, but Helen comes and takes 5, how many does Jack have left?
>show your work
Next time a motherfucker asks me for a pay raise.
Pic fucking related.
I'm talking to you, Harold.
Alright which one of you bastards is stealing my milk from the fridge? This bottle was almost full yesterday.
Well, if you put it in the fridge, put your name on it! It's the lunch room, people make their coffee there and shit.
If you want people to not touch your stuff, label them as yours.
Fuck being HR is a pain in the ass.
For fuck's sake guys, these are NOT your home computers, stop bringing in your personal drives, stop abusing the internet, you signed an agreement saying you wouldn't in the computer usage policy when you signed your contract.
Please use your allocated network drives (H: X: and Z:) and remember that we can monitor your computers via the event viewer.
Also, you can't use Fruitloops or Deckadance, audio devices are off due to the group policy, so please stop trying to install it.
Jokes on her. I ate all of the blueberry munchkins
Hey guys? Can we get a janitor of something down here in the storage sector? I'm pretty sure there was a mo-
IT'S TIME FOR SOME OFFICE STUFF YEEEAH
DON'T WORRY MACHO MAN IS A PROFESSIONAL DOCTOR
OUTTA MY WAY PROFESSIONAL DOCTOR THINGS NEED TO BE DONE
Jerry turn the thermostat down. I know you like the breeze but my office accrues all the residual heat.
Also, please check your email I sent last quarter's projections now and I'm starting on the halfyear earnings.
CMON' LARRY YOU TALIBAN SCUM FIGHT ME
OOOOH YOU JUST MADE THE WORST MISTAKE OF YOUR LIFE YEAAH
Toner delivery, can someone sign for this shit? I can't leave here and one of you needs to sign for it.
Hey Stacy can you watch my coffee? There's report of some guy putting things in drinks.
OOOH YEAH, SNAP INTO A SLIM JIM
[knocks over the coffee] fuck your coffee
LOOKS LIKE YOU TIMES UP YEEAAH
>Prepares For Finishing Move
THE NAME'S NOT JIM IT'S THE MACHO MAN, RANDY SAVAGE, AND I'LL SNAP YOUR SPINE LIKE I SNAP SLIM JIMS
IT'S OVER, I SAW THAT HULKAMANIA CELL PHONE CASE
THEN I'M COMING FOR YOUR DAUGHTER
HEY STOP TALKING AND DROP THAT ELBOW I'LL HOLD HIM DOWN BROTHER
I KNEW YOU WERE SECRETLY THE HULKSTER, TERRY
Aw shit you got me randy
HELP ME IN THIS TAG TEAM MATCH FELLOW MACHOMANIAC
Randy mail guy savage
Terry janitor hogan
Fooled hr good
Here's her head after the leg drop sorry BROTHER
WHO THE FUCK STOLE MY FUCKING STAPLER?
I NEED THAT RIGHT FUCKING NOW!
IF I DON'T HAVE THAT STAPLER BACK ON MY DESK IN FIVE FUCKING MINUTES, I WILL FUCKING QUIT THIS FUCKING JOB!
NO FUCKING STAPLER ON MY DESK
IT'S IN THE FUCKING COPY MACHINE
I FUCKING QUIT
DUBS GET SHOT
>TRIPS STOPS THE SHOOTER.
THE MACHO MAN NEEDS NO DUBS TO BREAK YOUR NECK
>Macho Man Throws Shooter Out Of The Window
>get this new job at some office called "4chan"
>have to go into an ally that stinks of piss and shit because the office building is in a fucking ally
>get to the building, looks like no one has been here
>well, squaters and vandels sure
>anyway, walk up to the main desk, guy asks me why im here and screams "newfags gtfo"
>walk past him and head to the floor i work
>pure. fucking. chaos.
>thousands of things fucking everywhere
>fuck niggers and other things writen on the wall
>fucking hate it already
>not even getting paid for my janitor job
>try to start cleaning up this shit hole
>everyone runs up to me
>i've woken the hive
>they start shouting and singing
>after a while its lunch
>put some hotpockets in the microwave
>eat them boiling hot
>head to the roof
>i have to wait in a line to end my life
>get to the front
>throw myself off
>some guy sees me and calls me gay