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Waifu claiming thread
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
You are currently reading a thread in /b/ - Random

Thread replies: 266
Thread images: 151
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Waifu claiming thread

The rules are simple:
>Claim your 2D waifu
>Post pics of your waifu
>Insult other waifus
>Discuss stuff
>Keep RP and ERP to minimum
>It's late but that's okay
>Post fitting, nit over-sexualised content
>Most important: Have fun!

Claimed.
>>
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Claiming Felix
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Claiming
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Raven claimed
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Claimed.
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>>700631653
Unless they're an aggressive species they really don't do much.

>>700631521
>

I'm running out of smug

Hitagi claim
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Iowa claim

I'm out for now later all
>>
>>700631804
go to sleep
>>700632203
dafuq is this shit?

>jenny claimed
>>
Claimed
>>
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>>700631985
Im not familiar with behaviors but i believe you killed a pretty cool wolf spider

>>700631988
I only have rations on me. Sorry but no money

>>700632280
Git gud

>>700632283
Same

>>700632295
Okay

Round 2 lets go! Sleep time lol
>>
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>>700630951
Only thing I got going on in a time like this.

>>700631226
Kek, again another good point. I honestly think all of that was there, at some point but it was rushed. Kinda how like how Konmai rushed TPP. If that's not the case then wew, just shady dealings.
>Can't argue with that :^)

>>700631366
It's nothing special, 2 Phones is better.

Can't feel body, time to sleep. Have a nice night/morning/whatever people.
>>
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>>700632280
>>
>>700632383
Night maki. First time seeing this

>smug
>>
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Keelah selai
>>
>>700632280
Can't be too careful, as much as I find spiders cool, i hardly know anything so I wouldn't be able to identify a venomous spider

>>700632283
farewell friend

>>700632366
Well shit..
>>
>>700632447
Whenever I don't pass out I do it.
>>
>>700632366
goodnight.
>>
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>>700631226
Heh well let's hope both of those things get fixed for the better haha!

>>700632383
Hmmph.. goodnight love.. talk to me asap tomorrow.

Guess I should get food. Fun talking to yall!
>>
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Isabelle claimed
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>>700632490
If you live in the US you only really have 3 to worry about. MAYBE 4.

>>700632418
>

>>700632366
I'm not the queen of smug, thats your job.
>>
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>>700632655
>>
>>700632655
Brown recluse
Black widow
And?
>>
>>700632214
Wolfs are designed to hunt without webs, they generally are fast.
>>700632295
>wew
>>
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>>700632383
How could they possibly rush the game? They delayed it by 2 months, I believe

>>700632395
Boredom and boredom?

>>700632559
I know the first won't, almost all our coaches are gone and so are our best boxers
As for my laziness, I just have to kick myself into shape again
Cya
>>
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Some desktop OC if anyone's interested.
Second waifu
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>>700632655
This is how you smug
>>
Wolf spiders are bros
>>
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Thank you to all the lovelies for stopping by!
>>
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>>700632744
The hobo spider.

>>700632717
>

>>700632870
we don't need a smug war here rory.
>>
>>700632958
Ima put my penor in your ass hole
>>
Yayoi GET
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>>700632870
>>
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>>700632987
>>
Claiming Akeno Himejima after losing bet against doubles.
>>
>>700632987
I know. Just giving examples.
>>700633043
Oh you wanna go?
>>
>>700632762
i came
>>
>>700632987
Hobo spider only in the very north western corner of us and its toxicity is not yet determined
>>
>>700633043
I just wanna punch her in the face for not letting her brother get it in
>>
>>700633152
Meanwhile we have to dodge these bad boys.
>>
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>>700633126
I don't know
Do I?
>>
>>700633273
The fuck are those
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>>
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>>700633413
...your waifu is shit...
>>
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>>700633246
It's implied in the after story Chance Encounter, and in the Light Novel, but it wasn't confirmed.

More for me :^)
>>
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>>700633152
Still I wouldn't take my chances, Yellow sac spiders are also one of the ones to look out for.

The US really only has a few problematic spiders.

The bigger problem is rattlesnakes.

>and inner city monkeys

>>700633126
How are you today Rory?

>>700633053
I have no more smug to give you.
>>
>>700633331
Atrax Robustus. Sydney Funnelwebs. They can bite through leather and nails. Death in as quick as 15 minutes.
>>700633311
I dunno. You tell me.
>>
do lolicons count?
>>
>>700633523
as long as 2d
>>
>>700633476
>inner city monkeys
Top kek
And yeah fuck snakes man...
>>700633514
Why did you give your spiders Brawndo and steroids
>>
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>>700633514
But you need to tell me.
>>
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>>700633476
Im drinking again and about to have dinner.
>>700633523
Lolis are for hugg, not for fugg. But we dont really discriminate. Most of the loli claimers claim as daughterus without claiming waifus.
>>700633636
We didnt. Thats how they didn't evolve from their prehistoric ways.
>oldest known type of spiders
>ambush predators
>>
>>700633636
>>700633636
YOU SAY SOMETHIN M8!???
>>
>>700633779
>>
>>700633413
absolute shit
>>
>>700633779
>>700633801
Thats a snek i said snakes
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>>700633636
>Brawndo
Because it's what spiders crave.

>>700633753
What are you drinking?
I'm gonna have a glass of wine tomorrow with breakfast.
>>
>>700633850
oh... carryy on
>>
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>>700632655
Only 3? No way

>>700632762
Then it probably was one

>>700632958
Well hello there
>>
>>700633753
And yet still nothing in comparison to the grandaddy long leg
>>
>>700633581
2d is best, 3d is pure cancer
>>
>>700633975
there's a daddy long legs right next to me if that means anything.
>>
>>700634009
what about Dot from Reboot
>>
>>700634099
>>
>>700634050
You can pick him up/hold him if you want. They're really bros
>>
>>700634099
Nope
>>
>>700634050
Do
>>700634136
And take a time stamp pic
>>
>>700634136
Iz correct. Daddy long legs vemom is too weak to do shit.
>>
>>700633053
Your wiafu is worthy
>>
>>700633751
But I dont know your mind.
>>700633889
Jack and coke. Keeping it cheap this week. I did buy a bottle of Kavalan Taiwanese whiskey and it was damn good.
>>700633975
They arent really dangerous though.
>>
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>>700633476
>>700633043
>>700632870
>>
>>700634298
Actually their vemom is quite deadly. It's the fact that their teeth are to small to even peirce skin
>>
>>700634136
>>700634219
he's up fairly high though
>>700634404
my thoughts exactly.
>>
>>700634404
That is a myth. Their poison can barely kill flies.
>>
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>>700634339
She isn't my waifu, in fact I had a nightmare where she laughed after killing my dog.
>>
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>>700633940
Sorry for the slow response, I'm watching something right now. Hello there! I finally renamed all of my Mami Pic and organized them. So I'm happy about that! How are you?
>>
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>>700634388
More like this
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>>700634589
Like what?
>>
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>>700634404
Mythbusters debunked that one.
Due to the difference between the fang length and average human skin thickness, it is unlikely that a bite actually penetrated Savage's skin. If indeed Savage felt a bite, it would confirm that pholcids bites can penetrate human skin, but will deliver envenomation harmless to at least some humans. Additionally, recent research by Alan Van Dyke has shown that pholcid venom is relatively weak in its effects on insects.
>>700634388
>this is how Rory sees mine
>>
>>700634522
definitely a yandere
>>
Yus
>>
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>>700634375
ahh see I can't do mixed drinks.

>>700633940
Yeah man.
3-4 give or take.
>>
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>>700634931
that's a new image I haven't seen you use before, Shiro.
>>
>>700634779
Just looked that episode up. You are correct
>>
>>700634572
I'm alright
Trying to figure out if this is fake https://youtu.be/DACmFvPJ6WQ?t=7m16s

>>700635000
Well shit, trips confirm
>>
>>700635000
Cant or wont? Any reason why?
>>
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>the most dangerous spider of all
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Wow anon! your penis is so tiny, How do you expect to please your waifu with that thing?
>>
>>700635142
8/10
>>
>>700635307
surely 8 is enough
>>
>>700632559

Nico is a lying cunt.
Fuck off.
>>
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Smug edition
>>
>>700635248
i bet she gives great blow/footjobs
>>700635307
I'd program her to enjoy it
>>
>>700635307
I'm sorry, but who the fuck are you? Are you aware that literally whos don't have the right to open their fucking mouth? If you want any (You)s or attention, play a anime girl and shut the fuck up
>>
>>700635488
You know she does with all that bondage shit
>jenny has to have a vibrating vagoo
>>
>>700635430
I cant match that smug. Its perfect. Too perfect.
>>
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>>700635497
It doesn't matter who I am, what matters is my plan.
>>
>>700635497
you seem pretty butthurt
http://www.adameve.com/sex-lubes/anal-sex-lubes-c-1032.aspx?&sc=SEMGLUB&cm_mmc=GGL-_-Condoms_US_NB_Google_Low-_-Anal_Lubricants_Exact-_-anal%20lubricant+Exact&pnt1=sPBi6pTMq&pcrid=68783192685&pkw=anal%20lubricant&pmt=e&dvc=c&productid=&pnt3=&gclid=CKfohffU1M4CFUhufgod1AAP5A
>>
@700635497
>Claims he wont get any (you)s
>gives a you for free
>>
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Never see C2 in these threads. Gotta give her some love.
>>
>>700635683
>>700635688
>>700635715
That is a terrible exaggeration

I hosted on a computer at earliest 3-5 months ago.
Meaning most of the time I have been here I have hosted on a tablet.
Hell there was even a point when My games, despite being slow, despite being on a fucking tablet was liked as much as deans or mokous.

I dont give a fuck about the yous, each and every one of you could remove the reply when speaking to me it means nothing.
What DOES concern me is fucking thirty of you decided to lurk and not even bother rping at all because of drama or a slow/bad host.
What DOES concern me, is were too busy backstabbing each other over petty shit from 5+ FUCKING MONTHS AGO

Even the fucking erpfags and drawfags have more of a backbone.
ITS NO FUCKING SURPRISE WEVE BEEN BANNED FROM EVERY CIRCLE OF 4CHAN TO THE POINT WHEN EVEN 8 HATES US, with the games in this state.

You dont want me to host, fine
I flat out refuse to.
Because only YOU can make the community better and Im fed up of telling you this fact.

See you tomorrow.
>>
>>700635430
you forgot to remove the helmet
>>700635616
>bondage spider
do go on
> autolube vagina
>nothing can top that
>>
>>700635738
fair enough
>>
>>700635738
C2 takes just as much space as CC you nigger
>>
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>>700635180
more won't

I'm not really a mixed drink kinda guy.

>>700635173
I don't really like insects man.
They freak me out.

which is why I paint them because I see them in my nightmares
>>
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>>700635173
Honestly that looks fake. Reaction (very poor acting and who runs from a corpse? It's not a zombie, it's a corpse, it won't move), and the way the body is wrapped(in a typical way you see in movies.) I'd say fake.
>>
>>700635683
If i take the mask of will you die?
>>700635806
>Das de joke
>>
>>700635797
>TL;DR
>>
>>700635913
>If i take the mask of will you die?
i should ask the same thing
>>
>>700636017
M8, you high or something?
>>
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>>700635913
It would be extremely painful.
>>
>>700635738
Here at the wrong times. We have a regular claimer whos a tattoo artist.
>>700635855
Some whiskeys are designed for mixing. Most blendeds, anything under a certain cost, anything too harsh for sipping. Extends the life of it as you cant drink it so fast. Was popular due to prohibition. Take your pick, really. I mainly do it because my body runs more efficiently on sugars than carbs. Long story.
>>
>>700635797
you seem angery
>>
>>700636079
You're a big guy
>>
>>700635855
Only freaks like insects
I just kill them

>Had a dream of being chased by a giant spider in a fogged woods


>>700635889
Mmm I could agree but I wouldnt know how I react to dead bodies (outside of funerals)
>>
>>700636069
i've taken some aspirin. does that count?
>>
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>>700636138
For you.
>>
>>700635992
>>700636114
You know what? FUCK ALL OF YOU. I'm done with these shitty fucking threads. I just wanted to have fun with an event tonight and move past the ebin kicks leg meme but no, I make one goddamn post and I get shitposted to hell because of it and now everybody on the entire FUCKING planet is victim blaming me, saying "oh it's your fault people are taking advantage of you" or "haha umadbro?" Fuck this. I quit. Forever
>>
>>700636145
>i used to be a furfag
>outdone by loli
>loli is superior to all media
>>
>>700636166
Just seem a little slow on these ironies/jokes tonight

>>700636248
Big guy, for me ;)
>>
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>>700636145
My dreams are more like hell.
I actually enjoy them, they give me good fuel.

>>700636100
I don't drink anything under 150-200$
I've had mixed drinks at restaurants, I just wouldn't drink them in my own house haha.
>>
>>700636267
THERE
IS
NO
ESCAPE
once youre on the /b/ board, you never truly leave..
>>
>>700636466
I get the wierdest dreams man
>>
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>>700636402
>>
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>>700636267
Oh you're still here...
>>
>>700636402
Well i'm tired as shit and my hands hurt. i honestly can't think straight
>>700636608
>being trapped in a black and white cube for hours knowing you can't even die
you think your dreams are weird?
>>
>>700636692
lol poor guy
hes probably gonna be lurking the rest of the night
lmao some people
>>
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>>700636466
I tend to buy only what looks interesting while keeping within a budget.
That budget this week was $200 for 2 weeks, so a big bottle of Jack and the Kavalan was perfect.
>>
>>700636746
>dont fap so much
You wont feel as tired and your hands wont hurt
>>
>>700636828
I bet he still doesn't believe he brought it on himself
>>
>>700636883
wheres the fun in that?
>>
>>700636919
i bet you 100 that its keemstar
>>
>>700636945
True that is
>>
>>700636746
>Seeing and hearing your best friends ground up into a patty while you sit there, unable to do anything, just listening to the screams echo, before being served said patties after they've been cooked
You think your dreams are weird?
>>
>>700637035
Literally who?
>>
>>>/trash/4846196
>>
>>700636883
I only fap once a day. i don't think not fapping will make a difference.
>>700637054
>Seeing and hearing your best friends ground up into a patty
Too vanilla of a nightmare for me
>>
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>>700632098
>>>/pol/
>>>/pol/
ITS HAPPENING!!!!
>>
>>700637080
rock dweller detected
>>
>>700637035
This all righteous fucking nigger, Anon, is doing this shit!
Anon you fucking nigger!
>>
>>700637112
I swear she's schlicking under that hobbit
>>
>>700637103
confirmed copypasta, gotcha
>>
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>>700636608
Mine tend to follow a common theme.
I like dreaming.

>>700636865
Hm I don't really go through liquor that much.
I've had a bottle of Kavalan Solist Fino Sherry Cask for a little over a month.

It's a Taiwanese single malt.
>>
>>700636746
>>700636746
Oh? Try this on for size

>Floating severed madoka heads laughing
>Eyeless yunos screaming like a banshee
>Look down, no legs but still standing
>Legless sakura harunos crawling
>Suddenly falls and arm flesh and wot not rips away into skeletal arms
>wake up

>>700637299
My dreams make me think Im on crack or lsd or some shit
See above
>>
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>>700637203
"why am i still getting hate"
"ive literally debunked all this bullshit"
>>
>>700637213
And that's why it turns me on
>>700637227
every dream is hyper-realistic. just part of our brain's assaholic tendencies.
>>
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>>700636145
Well human instinct is to check if they're alive or merely to observe. In many ways since we're developed beyond that not seeing it in 1st world countries. So we just run from it, because we don't fully understand the situation.
In my case, I'll just look at it and call the police.
>>
>>700637451
same here
>>
I like my dreams because i get to fuck my waifu for realsies
>>
>>700637451
Realistically I think I would pull out my knife and cautiously look everywhere... if the body is fresh

Now if it was a long decayed body then yeah I'd cover my nose from the stench

Skeletal bodies I'd probably ignore and think no less than a skyrim thing
>>
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>>700632098
>>30876111
>>>/pol/
>>>/pol/
>>>/pol/
ITS HAPPENING!!!!
>>
>>700637408
Wanna 4way?
>>
>>700637542
it gets pretty spicy if youre into lolicons, trust me
>>
>>700637385
>Suddenly falls and arm flesh and wot not rips away into skeletal arms
well that really spooky really fast
>>700637515
complete bitchaholic.
>>
>>700637611
>>>/pol/30776111
>>
>>700637621
>depends who it's with
>jenny
>>
>>700637722
Me n tali
>>
>>700637767
but who are you?
>>
>>700637646
Na my personal spoopy dream is this future robot warfare shit
>Robot knocks weapon off hands
>Breaks me limb by limb
>Loud cracking noise
>Blood squirting out from broken bones stick out from flesh
>pummels face til "death" ie waking up
>>
>>700637919
Anon, anon
Technically i am you, you are me and we are they and they are us
>>
>>700637961
black ops 4 confirmed
>>
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Claiming Eucilwood.
>>
>>700637989
we are legion
>>
>>700638044
U wot
>>
>>700637961
>laying in a heap, you see one last robot walk toward you in the distance
>there is a plate on its chasis
>in bold letters you can clearly read
>"This Robot Is Programmed To Fuck Your Mouth"
>>
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>>700635843
Her name is read as 'C2' even though it writes 'CC', it personally confuses me a bit and I'd rather it was written 'C2'.
>>
>>700637961
Skynet?
>>700637989
and is the 4th guy another anon?
>>
>>700638057
good choice
>>
>>700638085
You called anon, commander
>>
>>700638165
Ofc
>>
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>>700637501
Good.
>>700637608
Seeing a dead body in a public are your sense would automatically peak your reaction time and awareness of the surrounding area.
As for a decomposing body I understand, than again still the same result as I mentioned.
>>
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>>700638170
here have blank template for editing.
>>
>>700638125
in the first mission of black ops 3 campaign, towards the end, you get your arms ripped off by a robotic solider, and it seems similar to the recent greentaxt
>>
>>700638125
*greentext
>>
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Sup super faggots?
>>
>>700638229
"are" between 'public' and 'your' wasn't meant to be there.....

>Mami
>>
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do you faggots even own a life?
>>
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>>700638158
Kek

>>700638165
Never heard of it

>>700638229
Yeah ture you just never know

>>700638294
Oh, I never played the campaign, I just jumped to multiplayer/zombies
Who even plays those?
>>
>>700638286
thank you, fellow anon-chan
>>
>>700638223
well then, come join me
>>700638330
sup faggot?
>>700638358
yes. and i spend it here
>>
>>700638383
black ops 3 campaign was shit
the zombies and multiplayer was amazing.
black ops 2 campaign was really good though, along with battlefield 3-4
>>
>>700638286
>>
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>>700638422
Not much, how is life?
>>
>>700638422
I may now draw an XJ9/talie sex scene.
Look for it in a future waifu thread
>>
>>700638358
real life is overrated
>>
>>700638544
It "sucks"
>>
this thread needs some desu....
>>
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>>700638476
I havent played shi no numa looking one and the russian dragon yet, too lazy to download dlc
Mostly play the der riese remake to farm for that red hex camo
>>
>>700638607
i basically run around trying to snipe and rage everytime some fag uses the gravity spikes
>>
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>>700638603
>>700638607
>>
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>>700638383
If they're there. Just, whatever happens, happens.
Still that video is fake.
>>
>>700638544
it's boring. yours?
>>700638566
i'm not here that often though :(
>>
>>700638699
Gravity spikes are in zombies?
>>
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>>700638491
>>
>>700638742
Yeah, wouldnt be on youtube if it was real dead bodies
>>
>>700638745
Kik or email m8 ill send it to you spam free
>>
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>>700638590
You could kill yourself?
>>
Christ, you lot have some shit taste in everything, not the least of which waifus.

Daily reminder to chug bleach because you're just going to die alone surrounded by cats anyway.
>>
>>700638890
Twas just a vampire pun. Life is actually ok-mediocre
>>
>>700638760
oh god no
>>
>>700638860
you have telegram?
>>
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>>700638849
Not necessarily true, documentaries(under the educational purposes license) and actually some gore videos slipped through YT's filters.
>>
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>>700638745
My life is good, I'm just trying to find my way.
>>
>>700639168
true
>>
>>700639201
>you knkw she gives great bjs
>>
>>700639105
Are you serious or is that a website i just dont know yet...
>>
>>700639201
just gonna.. umm.. save that pic.. for research purposes.. thank you
>>
>>700639311
>we all know you're fapping
>>
>>700639362
fair enough
>>
>>700639430
Lets all fap together
>>
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>>700639271
She's a vampire.

>so shes really good at sucking

>>700637385
Mine are hard to explain.
>>
>>700639492
That was the implication, yes
>>
>>700639201
same here
>>700639298
it's a messaging service.
>>700639492
>really good at sucking
I want mavis to to suck the blood out of my boner
>>
>>700639491
spicy
>>
>>700639550
Hm, i have it now anon
>>
>>700639072
Oh good, I already feel cheap as is running in a circle for the zombies to pile up
Even tho I do eventually get fucked up

>>700639492
No worries then, they cant be bad as mine
>>
:|
>>
>>700639550
Just slowly change her diet from blood to semen
>>
>>700637299
I just have the base single malt. Again, budget. The other option was the port cask.
>>
>>700639704
@shitpostingrobot.
I'm waiting for your masterpeice

>internet dropped to 100k again
>gonna go until this is fixed again
>god i love 'Straya

>jenny
>>
>>700639774
once accomplished, the possibilities are endless..
>>
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>>700639771
Thats subjective.

My dreams are like Beksinski paintings.
Just with movement and noise.

But I get a lot of my creativity from my dreams.

>>700639550
I don't think anyone could think differently jenny.
>>
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I keep forgetting i have 4chan open lmao

I bought SuperHot and it's fun as fuck tbh
>>
>>700639861
Agreed, imagine having a girl with a physical need to feed on your seed
>>
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>>700639271
>>700639311
>>700639492
>>700639550

I know I have sunken to a new level by posting lewds. God forgive me.
>>
>>700640023
SUPER
H
O
T
>>
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claimed
>>
>>700640000
>Checked
That sounds pretty madokaish
All you need is orchestra music
>>
>>700640061
>not posting lewds
I bet you kiss girls too you faggot
>>
>>700640061
its all good
your generousity and lewdedness is glorified here
>>
>>700640061
>All of that pubic hair
Hurl
>>
>>700640047
true
also thats probably the best joke ive heard all night
>>
>>700640233
Wasnt a joke so much as a rhyme/word play
>>
>>700640154
oh god i just saw it too..
>delete pic
>>
>>700640289
it was a quality post
>>
>>700640345
Thank you none the less for the compliment anon
>>
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>>700640154
>>700640299

What's wrong with a hairy vagina? I think it's neat.
>>
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>>700640096
>madoka
>beksinski

I dont think we're talking about the same thing here.

>>700640061
>public hair

Take it away.
>>
>>700640429
not my cup of tea
>>700640345 no problem fellow anon
>>
>>700640429
The problem is it's not "neat" its just a tangled mess of fur.
>>
>>700640389
np
>>
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>>700640071
SUPER

HOT
>>
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>>700639773
:I
>>
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>>700640520
I read paintings and shit so I imagine madoka and that trippy ass witch land
>>
>>700640646
gimme
>>
>>700640646
Not even the real Eu.
>>
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>>700640640
Keep it in your pants god damn.

-Mavis
>>
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>>700640717
>>
>>700640640
needs less clothes
more lewd
>>
>>700640095
>doll on head/10
>>
>>700640844
gg
>>
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>Tfw its 513 am and I've only been up for 18 hours.
I need to fix my sleep schedule
>>
>>700641063
its 3:16 where im at
i gotta be up at 6:00
sheeeit
>>
>>700641162
Let me guess, you dindu nuffin?
>>
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>>700640891


Only thing i have
>>
>>700640657
This is beksinski
>>
>>700641309
That's pretty brutal

>Yuno
>>
>>700641469
>>700641469
>>700641469
>>
>>700641300
with my love for catgirls and lolis, i shall do well with this pic
thank you fellow anon
>>
>>700641544
>girl
Boy you are so wrong
>>
>>700641634
shotacon? even better!
>>
i killed a thread
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