ITT: Badly described videogames.
I'll start with a real softball:
>Slav on Slav violence
>Look at all these niggers
>A gay European? Whaaat?
Rockets, planes, satellites, space stations, lunar bases, colonies in other planets, physics manipulators; but they're all really fucking hard to get done.
Bonus if you can explain the reference to it: Clay wrapped in duct taped on the side of fireworks.
One space ship. After dying ten times, two space ships. After dying like fifty more times you have four space ships to choose from, and you're feeling good about yourself.
>There is no winners, only those that don't lose.
>"Holy crap, a floating weapon in space!"
Nope, >>700631296 already got it right.
In HL2 you never leave the planet or see space or even see or hear a reference to space, mainly because the aliens are transdimensional and not extraterrestrial.
>Pick either a girl or guy from a few different factions
>Command an army and take over cities and shit
>Get new and better soldiers to fight for your army after taking over a city
Did you not even think about any of the clues? I specifically said IKEA, what does that mean to you? You see Ikea and instantly think FUCKING DOOM WITH FUCKING DEMONS AND SHIT. Seriously, you should be wearing a helmet right now.
> dad isn't black but decides to act like it
> "gf" kicks you out with him
> he's fucking sleeping in some crappy life thing because he doesn't have one
> wake him up and have to help him with dumb shit
> he fucking kills himself
> everyone says "he's good guy"
> finish his shit for him
>Ooh, a package
>ITS A FUCKING BOMB
>OH SHIT NOW ITS FUCKING NUCLEAR OR SOMETHING AND THE CITY IS LITERALLY IN RUINS
>You have superpowers now though
>Also, theres some faggot named zeke who lives on a roof, what the fuck zeke
Eh, the developer named it Kerbal Space Program, because as a kid him and his friends would make little green guys out of clay and duct tape and strap them to fireworks. Those very green clay and duct tape little fucks were named Kerbals. And thus the name was used.
So there's this guy who's into a chick who is like a solid three feet taller than him. She's really fucking rich and he's really fucking poor and yet he goes to the worlds edge just to fucking be with her.
I haven't beaten it yet either. Got it from a humble bundle semi recently and started playing it. Then I got Witcher 3 for free and now that's all im playing.
Oh and a game
>choices don't actually matter
I've been looking to get it for some time and this is the first time I've ever heard it called shit. I may back off and not waste my sixty bucks on it. What's wrong with it tho?
It took that long? for real?
Well, i'll try one hopefully people will get
>be a man in the profession of pipeworks
>get letter from hot gf
>"boy i'm comin to tha real hood come find me nigga"
>go to real hood
>literally everyone is a robber
>cute girl with no arms
>fatass pickin on no armed girl
>tard rage: engage
>sends his fatlings to get me
>walk out with armless girl unscathed
>meet up with armless girl dad
>no arms must run in the family
>he has no arms
>go in pipe he shows me
>end up going to the even realer hood
>there's a door in the underground hood that needs 7 shiny rock star things
here's a hint
>hot purple ghost that probably isn't a girl
Look up some reviews. It's shit. Not actually multiplayer even if you are on the second planet as someone. Not only that but it's the same damn thing just re colored on every planet.
Nice. Rebel Galaxy was what immediately came into mind, but I was all like, "No one plays that shit except for me and my brother." So I marked it off as an impossibility. Still kept it on the list though just because it fit the description absolutely perfectly, even more so than the other games. GG mate.
It has had many an issue actually running on most PCs.
ps4 version seem to be fine if you are into that sort of thing where you don't actually do anything and grind for no reward.
Planets are meaningless pit stops that serve to grind more fuel to go to the next planet, to get more fuel...........repeat infinitely. No MP, no real gameplay, not what was promised 100s of times and:
True. But it has been confirmed via outside of game lore that Xen is quite literally just a super alternate dimension version of Earth. An alternate dimension so fucking far jacked up that it doesn't even resemble our reality. Same applies with the Combine; they aren't actually that much of a space faring race (just nite not much, they do have dominance in space as well but space isn't their specialty) as much as they are a race that take diver alternate versions of Earth over and over. It's like some Rick and Morty council of Rick shit.
Extremely repetitive. It's fun for like the first 5 hours, then you get bored from finding the same planet with the same animals but with a slightly different color scheme. It's also terrible optimized for PC. If anything, just pirate it.
HOLY SHIT YOU FUCKER IM GOING TO DO THE SAME THING WHEN I WAKE UP IM GOING TO FUCKING DO A WHOLE PLAYTHROUGH AS FAST AS I CAN. But seriously dude, watch out for bugs. There is one serious bug that will actually cause spore to crash and you have to revert to the last save. So remember to save every 10 minutes.
This is mainly XBox 360 only from what i've noticed, but the game is on PC as well.
>sequel with lovable characters like:
>The Black Coach
>The Asshole Gambler
>The Filmmaker Girl
>The Dumbass Hick
>Game is nice
>maybe i'll play online
>every game I join I get kicked before I can even play
>are you fucking kidding me
>Keith plays a role, I guess
>Top down shooter
>Kinda like a MOBA
>3 teams; 2 human and one monster
>There are 2 monsters and they can turn humans into new monsters
>Game ends if one human base is destroyed or if monster base is destroyed
Yup, don't die when your mates are in combat and you aren't. It's such a fucking simple bug and yet it fucning destroys the whole game. I am absolutely amazed it never got fixed and no one ever noticed when the game was first released.
>If you didn't know what causes the crash, now you know. Yup, it's just a spawn bug.
XBone seriously has the best exclusives of either console. MS also has a deal with EA so XBone gets even more EA exclusive deals and more exclusive shit. On an XBone you can play sunset, titanfall, halo, and so many more. Also, XBone gets way better frames than the PS4. Lets say a PS4 runs a game at an average of 40 FPS, XBone would run it at 44 FPS with a hogher particle count.
I personally didn't find the OST of the base game particularly anything worth noting, but that expansion mate.
That expansion just... Aah. whenthesunhitstheridgejustright.jpg Another game on my list of games to play tomorrow.
>Story is about a famous 9 foot tall green war hero
>Story is really about some faggot and his faggot team of faggots
>A pretty big letdown in some aspects
>A pretty big improvement in some aspects
>Also had a huge Esports following that died over like 3 months.
Man, Another fuckin maxis game. I'm telling you, Maxis was my favourite studio until they got shut down. They made so many good games. EA just fucked with them a lot and literally crushed Spore. Still ended up a fun game though. I'm glad EA is learning how to be a good company though. Its like they are realizing people dont want to buy shitty rushed piles of bugs and dogshit.
I played the early access for it since I got a code. It's not really P2W, since 2 of the 3 starter characters are pretty fucking good and you can get everything from playing. It might take a while, but you'll get it.
I take it we're the two same anons basking in the glory of what Maxis once was in its prime?
>Basically the faggots who keep furiously agreeing with each other in the most autistic way possible about SimCity and Spore?
No it doesn't I happen to believe both console's exclusives are shit. And to defend against your implication that I play jrpgs on PS4, I haven't played one I liked since FFX/2
>Holy fuck that tutorial, why so hard?
>NEVER GET PAST LEVEL ONE
>It's totally fine that enemies can jump up 40 story buildings and kill you in two shots
>your guns mean nothing
>NEVER GET PAST LEVEL ONE
I hated using the Armchair against him for some reason. If you use the pistol (Pride I think), it fucking destroys him even when not fully auto. The rocket launcher wasn't terrible against him, but it's nothing compared to the pistol