Feels thread?
I think I need to cry /b/
bumping
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n_ajVJVLo7o
>>697546054
I need some sadness. Bump
Trips
post stories
Last night during a 'post a girl and anon say what they'd do to them thread', I posted a bunch of pictures of my ex who broke off all contact with me, and Anon's spent a lot of time saying how cute she was, calling her a goddess, and explaining in immense detail how they'd rape her.
I jerked off over the replies twice and spent today drinking and feeling depressed over the whole thing.
I'm a little miffed I missed the 2 for 1 sale on break at the market today. I could have used the bread to make sandwiches for the week this week. Instead I will just cook something huge and freeze it using them for lunches. A bit of a nuisance, but a minor one.
>Met this girl at work, amazing girl, not very good looking but sparked a fire with in me nonetheless
>change my whole lifestyle to appear to her
>get /fit/, start reading and becoming a better person in general
>talk for about a month off and on
>Our jokes connect, I felt happy every moment with her
>My mistake was believing the feeling was reciprocated
>Finally get some alone time with her, time to pop the question
>Ask her out to dinner and phone number
>Gives a suprised and worried look
>"Anon, I'm getting married soon."
>"o-oh haha"
>"I'll buy you lunch as friends though, haha!"
>"haha its okay"
>deadinside.png
It was my fault for not digging deep enough. But time to go back home to nothing. What good is all this money if I have nobody to spend it with.
>off my meds
>anxiety is melting my brain
>been drinking all day, but still not drunk
>no one to talk to
>alone in my room in the dark
a new low for me
>>697547800
So sad..
>>697547800
This kills me
Haven't really been okay myself. I'm not motivated to do anything and I've been waking up in a cold sweat every night at 2am unable to go back to sleep. I think I might have insomnia.
>>697547120
my heart, man
like this just makes me think about my dad in the war
jesus
im sure flying a plane is just as nerve-wracking as hiding behind a barrier hoping somebody doesnt see you
aggh i hate to love these threads goddammit
Got this text a couple of days ago. I'm not going to offer any context other than it was from a female I like a lot.
https://youtu.be/Zw6_ZJZmOGc
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0zgl1QSmwrY
These two links will cheer all of you faggots up
>>697548183
Been there many times. You kinda get used to it (and that's a fucking scary thought.) Ride it out, hoss.
bamp
>>697548183
That's me rn /b/ro, I'm with you.
>>697548183
I can relate. We're here for you, /b/ro.
>>697548604
Context is clear, my man. For what it's worth, I'm sorry.
>>697548183
it gets worse and worse and then you realise and it fades away
>>697548183
No you silly goose you cant pull that shit, take your fucking meds Every. Single. Day.
okay here I go...
>be me
>be in school
>there is this girl that i completly like
>she seems to like me too
>I always loved when I could kiss and hug her
>summer comes
>can't see her
>first day of classes
>I'm excited to see and talk to her again
>but now she looked changed, now she seems to try to avoid me
>am I now trying to get back to those days I felt that life was worth
>it's difficult, I feel she even tries to sit somewhere else that is not on my side
>I feel very sad
>I feel that my heart is broken
What can I do?
>>697548604
did you ask for a photo of her feet?
>>697548183
show me your bottle
>>697547800
Oh well, might as well post mine. It's not much, but it's something.
>about 4 years ago, best friend (Let's call him Dave for simplicity) & I changing schools
>we end up going to different schools, but whatever, we stay in touch
>in my new school, basically everyone is a dickhead, aside from four or five people
>I deal with this shit for four years, flash forward to about three months ago
>became friendly with Dave's friends, Dave seems to be doing increasingly fucked up shit at this point, heard he broke into a council estate once (I'm a britfag)
>one day, Dave gets incredibly drunk & openly calls his friend a slut directly to her
>Dave ducks out of the ensuing shitstorm, he don't want any of that shit, y'all.
>I face the girl & her friends, who at this point were in full on ragemode
>try and explain how he drinks a lot, how he doesn't realise what he's saying is bad
>fast forward a month, all of his friends hate me now, I haven't spoken a word to them since- rarely talk to Dave
Y'all want some more? I have nothing else to do, so I can spare the time.
>>697549103
>>697549084
>>697548604
>>697548183
>>697548157
>>697548091
>>697547889
>>697547800
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0zgl1QSmwrY
So many (you)s amiright
>>697549084
Move on
>>697548183
This reads like a terribly dark haiku
>>697549214
only one
>>697549036
Not that anon, but fuck meds. I've known too many people who wind up with side effects worse than the issues that were there in the first fucking place. I've seen it "level people out" by zombifing them. I won't fuck with them.
>>697549084
there are other girls at your school whom you would realistically drop this girl for once you've spent as much time with that new girl
It's not easy to move on, especially when you're not the one who ended it, but you really don't need that girl
>source: 20, fucked 32 girls and rarely speak to the girl who broke my heart (because she never really did..I was just a bigger fag back then)
>>697549225
what do you mean?
>>697549467
They are the only reason I havent killed myself yet
>>697549515
For fuck's sake. Just gotta ruin this thread for all of us. MMOOOOODDDDSSSSSSS
>>697549511
>when girls think "constantly bitching and whining to one guy about every other guy she's talked to" is considered friendship
>>697549155
Sure man. Can't stand British socializing seems like some paper thin shit where saying the wrong thing fucks you for life.
>>697549515
MODS MODS MODS
Just found out my best friend slept with my now ex gf but while we were still together.
Don't know how to feel. I've been over her for a while but now when I jerk off I always end up thinking about them fucking and it turns me on and infuriates me at the same time. The fuck is that about?
>>697548183
Sorry but.. could I get sauce please? Much love to you anon
>>697549616
Stop wallowing over her. Its done, it happened, its in the past. Look to the future and move on.
>>697547889
>>697548157
>>697549084
>be me
>starting to read a potentially fine greentext
>first three lines include word girl
>mfw
>>697549955
fucking this tbqh
>at folkehøgskole 2014/2015 (norwegian fag gap year thing)
>meet beautiful girl, instant love
>looking back at it obviously not reciprocated
>keep spending time with her hoping something will happen
>she gets piece of sit boyfriend who neglects her
>I start smoking weed because heartbroken neets gonna neet
>eventually get caught by cops and lose my chance at going to the military
>attempt an hero and fail because my rope tying skills are as good as my love moves
>now a year later don't talk to her and study abroad.
>cry almost every night because i want to hold her and talk to her
>>697546054
One of my favorites from a past Feels thread. Stay strong anons!
anyone here read a book by Søren Kierkegaard?
>>697550511
>>697549955
Feels threads are always full of "her." This is nothing new.
>>697550638
>norwegian fag gap year thing
What did he mean by this?
>>697550789
Thank you anon, even if its facebook status.. Thats something that a lot of people need to get.
>>697550789
Are you the same who reply something about his b-day some days ago?
>>697550957
It's something some norwegian neet fags do as a gap year
>>697549084
Walk up and ask her what her problem is.
Chances are you did something she didn't like. Or someone told her something about you. Or just moved on.
>also probably underage b&
>>697550809
and why the fuck shall i care? its not sad that some chick doesnt want someones sweet love...
>>697551323
Didn't say you had to care. Didn't say I had to care. Just said it's going to be there whether you like it or not.
>>697549800
But wait, there's more! (Unfortunately)
>about a couple of months ago, I text Dave to see how he's doing
>apparently he's friends with the girl he called a slut earlier again
>tfw they don't give a rats arse about me anymore
>hear Dave's doing even more fucked up shit, he's now a full-on alcoholic
>Dave starts to talk with me less & less, I haven't talked to him for basically a month and a half
>I now literally have seven fucking friends
>try get friendly with some of the dickheads & '$wagggggg lordzzz', finally get into one of their parties
>do nothing & stand in the corner like the autistic shit that I am
>steal a couple of bottles of vodka & leave, haven't spoken to them since
And here I am now, basically an autistic weeb with next to no friends, 0 social skills & depression, for which I have to wait a month to get a proper therapist. What a wonderful world.
>>697547800
Why not just try to make friends? It would hurt the guys dad if he found out his kid was just lying to him and wasting gas for nothing.
Sorry man, I can't feel sorry for someone who don't even try
>>697549103
Ask? no.
>>697551603
Wish I had 7 friends...
>>697551603
Just wait till therapy it might help ease the pain
>>697551622
u are to normal to understand good for you
>>697551603
>literally have seven friends
That's 6 more than I got man.
But that one is cool shit. Having one 1 real good friend is better than having 100 fake friends
>>697551926
I sure hope it does. At this point I'm a shell of a being, covering my emptiness with cynicism & sarcasm.
>>697552245
I wish you luck /b/rother. At least your friend won't back stab you at the first sight of hollow popularity.
>>697552138
>Too normal
What are you like retarded or something? Not trying to be a dick by saying that.
Unless you're like a massive drug addict, a huge flaming homo, or a child molester you should be fine. Just hang out with people, get some self confidence, find a hobby and don't shut yourself in feeling sorry for yourself
>>697546054
Today is my mom birthday, I usually call right at 12 pm on birthdays for "celebrate", i forgot her birthday
>>697551464
i was afraid it would sound too much of an accusation of you telling me that i shall care, the point is that it evokes more laughter than sadness
>>697551918
I only have 2
>>697552355
Hahaha same dude same this shit fucking sucks, its been years since I felt alive, yknow?
>>697552646
>>697552138
And even if you were a huge flaming homo or a drug addict or even pedo I'm sure they even have friends. Fucked up friends but friends none the less
>>697552798
More "pity" from me, these manlets who think losing a girl who probably wasn't into them in the first place is the end of their lives. I've survived much worse.
>>697552840
I know how you feel all to well, bro. We both hope it'll get better soon, but we both know it won't. Glad to see we're suffering together, though
>>697552355
'Scuse me while I check my own dubs.
>>697547800
>>697553296
Thats what these hreads are about, really. Suffering together. Goodnight anon
>>697553618
I.........probably would've shot everyone.
>>697553489
I can't imagine how this must feel.
>>697551603
therapist wont help you. having 6 friends who are not swaglords is more than enough. stop daydreaming about having lots of friends (excluding swagfaggots and people you dislike), its not common
>>697553266
im all ears, please
>>697554055
It's not terribly interesting; I'll warn you now. I also come across as an incompetent faggot the entire time and, while I may be one, it's hard to casually talk about how much of an idiot I have been and can be at times.
>>697553885
I'm not depressed because of lack of friends, I'm depressed because I feel empty and dead inside, and that none of my friends even care about me.
Besides, the friends are just memesters and edgelords. I don't think I've said anything actually unironic since I met them.
>>697554473
They're not friends, then.
This is mine, /b/.
>parents died when I was little
>around 12 yrs old, living with abusive uncle and aunt
>one day uncle goes to the market and comes back with a smelly, dirty old horse
>apparently, seller told him it was bred from some old prize winning stallion or something
>me and my aunt dont think much of it, but what ever
>they name it "Dirty", as its an old dirty horse
>having lived on my uncles farm almost all my life, I love horses, and have been riding them for as long as I can remember
>uncle turns to me
>"if we ever catch you riding our new stallion, we will beat the shit out of you"
>wouldntbethefirsttime.jpg
>lol what ever, its not like I wanted to ride it anyway
>few days later, I play in the field by myself
>messing around with some old tractor tire I found
>dirty is just eating grass, like a horse usually does
>my aunt and uncle keeps coming outdoor to check that Im not riding him
>get bored and climb inside the tractor tire
>it starts rolling (field wasnt flat)
>ohshitnigger.jpg
>i cant stop or get out
>uncle and aunt comes out to check up on me
>they see me rollin'
>they hatin'
>patrolling
>trying to catch me riding Dirty
>>697554316
please do im interested and now even curious
Life may be awful but take comfort in that you are not alone in your suffering. You are not the only guy in his mid twenties who wishes every night to wake up in a different world. You are not the only person who just wants some human contact so badly that it physically hurts. You are not alone. But you're pain is still there. It's okay to feel that pain.
>>697553489
Pow, right in the feels
>>697554473
if you simply feel despair as it is, please dont get rid of it, explore it and pay a close attention to it
Hey /b/, I can't really feel things correctly. It is weird. Ask me anything!
>>697554782
ah, sweet validation for my depression. How I have yearned for thee.
>>697554717
Your curiosity activates my paranoia...
>>697554586
Well, the closest thing I have to them really. I'll take what I can get.
bump because im sad all the time
>>697546054
This works every time: imagine 14-year-old you talking to modern day you.
>>697555255
Mhmm. Looks like my second set of dubs.
>>697549511
Thats the exact situation I'm in, except I've told her... feels bad man
Anyone else here numb the pain with drugs? Just bumped some k and i feel pretty good, i was pretty stressed out before.
>>697555361
Goddamn would I want to kill myself
>>697549525
>but you really don't need that girl
Thanks. You make me cry
When a good thing goes bad, it's not the end of the world. It's just the end of the world that you had with one girl.
>>697548183
Iktfw
>>697555555
>>697555201
im a randomfag whos building up his attitude of people in irregular situations, now lets hear it
Been going through some shit lately and feel like watching a movie that will hit me in the feels. Any suggestion is good :) thanks /b/ros.
>>697555361
more like cringe for me
>>697549849
I only jerks to my ex... ugh. It's shit but she's the only one
>>697555794
Hmm. I'm not so great with films. As for TV series, FRINGE really got me at one point, but that was more a personal thing as opposed to actual feels.
Feels good to be numb, i just wish i could fall asleep with her next to me.
here we go
>have amazing girlfriend
>madly in love with her since the first time i met her around 3 years ago
>weve been dating for about as long
>loved each other more than anything in the world
>made so many sacrifices for each other but neither of us really minded because we loved each other so much
>she is literally the only constant in my life
>i could have the worst day in the world and she would still be there for me
>lately we've been fighting a little bit
>nothing too out of the ordinary for a relationship, weve had fights in the past etc
>been trying to organise fun things to do together
>always an excuse, some completely fair and legitimate
>some not
>the other day we were talking
>ask her about why shes been so distant and busy lately
>she says that shes been feeling differently lately
>to cut a very long story short she said that she has started to fall out of love with me
>doesnt miss me when im gone like she used to
>doesnt have me on her mind
>isnt convinced that she will enjoy spending time with me
>she is "unsure" on if she wants to be in the relationship anymore
I'm so fucking destroyed /b/ I love her just as much now as i ever have, and just knowing that she doesnt feel the same way.. man it just hurts so much
Current feels.
>>697556159
Thanks will check out.
>>697555732
>building up his attitude of people in irregular situations
What the actual?
I really don't think even this is the proper forum to go into detail. Yes, that sounds dumb, but...damnit, I don't want to come back here at some point and find it posted in a cringe thread (because that's all it feels like to me.)
I think it's time for more weed...
>>697534591
... this thread /b/ros..
It got me right in the feels </3
>>697556431
Oh yeah, and watch Blade Runner. The end of that made me tear up properly. Fucking masterpiece.
>>697554610
>>697556799
Actually heard that movie is great so I plan on watching that tonight now.
>>697555361
>>697557006
Trust me, you reaaaaaalllllly should. It's probably my favourite movie.
6 years later and I found myself crying on a casual night's drive. Alone.
>>697556799
Hey, a third set of dubs. Isn't that wonderful?
>>697557123
Sometimes its just not meant to work out, it sucks man
>>697557222
What about trips sir?
>>697554610
>>697556868
....
Gimme some time to gather my thoughts. I don't have anything written. I don't want to do this but I'm going to roll the dice. Maybe this is some sort of lesson in being vulnerable.
>>697557320
Well, would you look at that. I got three dubs & a set of trips. It's the best day of my life, someone get confetti.
>>697556422
hang in there dude. This happened to me but i some how made it so sh came back. Just hang in there bro
>>697549686
>>697549467
everyone sees them differently /b/ros
i pop them for fun
>>697547120
Makes me hate women even more
>>697557864
It just seems so helpless, i asked her if there was any chance that she could fall in love with me again and she said she didnt think so, but we are both still trying
>>697557279
Only makes me wonder who it would work with. If the person I want so much that I feel like I'd do anything for her leaves, what else could possibly make me happy?
I saw some description from a heroin user on Reddit that explained it pretty much exactly how I felt about her. If you've felt the greatest possible pleasure from someone in such a beautiful way, all directions are down.
I can't even find value in hope anymore.
>>697546054
I've accepted that I'm the black sheep of my family, and the fringe of the circle of friends I have. I've accepted this, and have decided to focus instead on building myself through my hobbies and cultivating what I want to learn/study. I understand now why no one talks to me as much any more, and why my 'family' has pretty much stoppled altogether.
>>697558093
>even more
Care to tell us why you hate 'em in the first place?
>>697546054
waaaaaaa
>>697558272
I'm not him, but do you really have to ask? Women are fucking useless, and they only think about themselves.
>>697556422
We Here for you b/ro just hang in there, you need time for you and what you really want in life
>>697558133
well freaking out to her about it is not a good choice. try and get alone with her more. take it back to the good old days where you guys fell in love. Stare her right in the eyes at times and when maybe the moment feels right kiss her. if she denies it try again. Dont let the goal be sex, but to spark that flame again you know? it was tough for me, i had no one to talk to but she came back and everything is back to normal. is anything happening in her life? like someone passing or if she started talking to someone new more?
>>697558391
ooh, you sound quite salty my friend
>>697548157
You might not have gotten her but you definitely improved yourself. You'll probably get a girl in no time
>>697548157
hey man just build off of your mistakes. learn ya know. Hang in there
>>697558243
I relate with the greentxt all too well, but I faltered long ago.
>>697549084
You could ask her/Demand to know what her issue is as you were friends.
Or,
Just ignore the girl and find other holes to fill. Either she'll come back thinking you're some kind of confident guy who can and will do better or she'll forget and you'll be knee deep in your classmates.
>>697558514
I want her
>>697558706
No salt here, just tired of women and their bullshit. You should be too, unless you're a woman.
>>697557544
All right, an intro to gauge interest...
>Welcome to 2008
>23
>Mom's been dead two years now
>See dad as being at fault; fuck him (he wasn't, but I still don't see eye to eye with him)
>Living with grandmother (mother's mother)
>Finish a training program in residential maintenance
>Fucked up said training
>Went through the material in 8 months
>Employers want 2 years experience, minimum
>FuckThisRecession.png
>Took the option to continue with classes at local community college
>Thinking about going into Social Psycology
>Dumbass whiteknighting fuck
>Thought I could save the world
>Anyway...
>Still with my ex at this point
>Plan to transfer to a 4 year school where she lives
>Life's looking up
>Confidence at an all time high
>Then comes 2009...
>>697558947
>faltered
How so?
>>697558621
Thats the thing ive been trying to get alone time, but its gotten to the point where im annoying her by asking so much, but if i dont ask then she wont and it will just fade away and die.
i dont know if she is talking to anyone new, i dont think she is but you can never be sure i guess
i had a friend back in highschool who felt like a brother to me. we were very different in where we were in the social ladder; he was well-known and loved by every single person in the school, whereas i was a usual loner who hung out around the library. during school i never really spoke to him because i was afraid that it would deduct points off his social status... well at least metaphorically speaking.
anyway, after school we would always hang out at my house because his parents were usually never home and he just wanted to hang around with me. we would talk about comics, how ugly the substitute was that day, and sometimes: problems. well, usually only my problems. stereotypically, i expected him to never have any problems-- hell he was academically successful, good looking, and friends with everyone in school. he was personally a good guy, he never disrespected anyone nor purposefully insulted someone. he had those good vibes coming outta him.
... except he never had a family be there for him. every single awards ceremony no one would show up, his birthdays were spent at my house, when he was awarded for his 4.0 GPA no one was there to tell him "i love you and im proud of you my son." no one was ever there.
its been 8 years since he committed suicide.
im sorry i wasnt there when you were at your darkest hour
im sorry i selfishly loaded my luggage on your back
im sorry i assumed you were happy
im sorry im so so sorry
Eli i hope youre finally happy wherever you are.
>>697559083
I mean, I would call out generalisation, but whatever. We're on /b/. Anything goes, eh faggot?
Soo, this whole thread is based upon the urge to cry or wanting to?
Inb4youhavenolife
gets job, realizes life actually sucks.... cry for real reasons like the mother of you suddenly getting the news she has cancer and your father was a abusive piece of shit.
>>697559251
yea dude i felt the same way.... its ruff
>>697559430
Even the truth, yes.
>generalization
You'll see what I mean when you piss her off one good time.
>>697558167
What is Absurdism
>>697559246
Ya know, in the screencap'd greentext you had attached?
I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: "Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, a shattered visage lies, whose frown,
And wrinkled lip, and sneer of cold command,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed:
And on the pedestal these words appear:
'My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:
Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!'
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.
>>697546054
>move into apartment and start college and new job, so I am super busy all the time.
>make nice with neighbor guys, watch movies and drink with one of them in my apartment.
>just break up with boyfriend a week or so before
>neighbor says he likes me, I like him too.
>start a relationship without the title, but there's no one else I'd rather be with.
>school/work takes up a lot of my time
>he meets all of my friends/family, though I've only ever met his roommate
>roommate has a girl he sleeps with
>hear neighbor that I like say his roommates girl is the only one out of all of his fuck buddies that he actually likes
>I ask him if he wants to make it official, and he says yes and we are happy.
>one night, I tell neighbor that I'm falling in love with him
>he says nothing, breaks up with me two weeks later saying "I don't want a relationship based on convenience"
>Sleep together a month later, get into arguments all the time but he still hangs around as friends.
>haven't cried so much over anyone.
>I move out, brother takes over apartment. His bedroom is above neighbor guys.
>he tells me neighbor guy has been fucking his roommates girl for a few weeks after I left.
>message neighbor guy asking him about it (not my business, but I was livid he dumped me to fuck her)
>he denies it, of course, though my brother tells me the opposite, and little things that happened before I moved that made me suspicious.
>basically he has the attitude of "I didn't do anything wrong"
>Tell him sorry for burdening him, but I hope he has a good life, etc bullshit.
>ff to today, I find a guitar pick that was his in some of my things I'm going through.
>imagine him fucking that girl
>flick the guitar pick into the woods
I kind of get sad still, but remembering his nonchalant attitude the entire time just makes me repulsed. There were things I could have done differently, but I didn't. The idea of breaking up or cheating or anything like that had never crossed my mind.
>>697559830
oh
>>697551603
Haha you lonely faggot. I have 8. But still, I completely love and trust them. Quality over quantity.
>>697559593
Here's an example: Marie Curie. Was she a self serving arsehole? If so, why?
>>697559243
Go onnnnnnnnn
>>697559907
Shit. I'm real sorry. But at least your busyness keeps your mind occupied, right?
>>697560183
Different time period (literally 19th Century), different types of women available. Granted, you have a few who managed to be of some use in the past, but today, the average woman is about as useful as a pocket-pussy or a football bat.
>>697559083
as a femanon, I wholeheartedly agree
>>697560525
Even women can agree.
>>697559251
I am going through the same thing right now. Except i have a kid with her. Dont let those paranoia thoughts get to you, i know its hard but find stuff to keep you occupied. I ended up pouring my heart out the other night and may have now really messed up any chance but i chose to do it for my own mental state of mind. I was borderline suicidal. Shit is rough.
>>697559346
I'm sorry. I can't offer many words. But I'm sure you've heard it. Don't blame yourself. I don't know how I could handle that. I'm sorry dude.
>>697554610
>>697559243
>January sees my ex catch pneumonia and have both a grandfather and her favorite uncle die
>She lives 300+ miles away
>Beyond poorfag, no car
>I'm becoming less attentive to her problems
>Spirals out of control for 6 months, finally ends
>Fucks up all my plans
>No point in transferring now
>Can't stay at training program facility any longer
>Uncle virtually tosses me out of grandma's house (has power of attorney)
>Valid reasons; I'd been sponging off her since mom died
>Still a dick move
>Move in with a dude I knew
>Got a job under the books
>Fucked that job right up in less than two months
>lol, what's self-esteem?!
>Late July
>Roommate tells me eviction imminent
>Dafuq, he's not been mailing in the rent?!
>Panic!
>Money gone
>Soon, he's gone to North Carolina, too
>Started talking to a chick I knew from the program
>She and some other friends could possibly save my bacon
>They're upgrading to a bigger apartment first of August
>Can give me a place to crash
>ThankYouGod!
>Concoct plan to continue at community college and live off grant money and scholarships (loans=bad idea...and I was right)
>It can't get any worse than this!
>(Oh, you poor, ignorant Anon...)
i am free as long as i have the power to kill myself.
>>697560867
man i feel you anon, im really honestly the same, I poured my heart out and i reckon it made it worse because it forced her to say the things she was feeling which could make them a reality. I'm just such a ffuck up
>>697556422
Hold on my homie, you got dubs, also, find what you love and follow it to glory
>>697559251
Now I feel better, and feel like weight has been taken off my chest. I didnt seek empathy, more like answers to questions that my thoughts were crippling me into suicide. She got mad as fuck for it and i dont blame her, but i have no outlet i dont rink or smoke or go out, all i do is play destiny and go flawless. lol.
>>697546054
I'm bipolar. I feel immense sorrow and self hatred for no reason. I feel great peaks of joy that are without substance. I believe people are out to get me when there is no reason to believe I am worth the effort. I can't even trust my own feelings. Is it any wonder that half of us try to kill ourselves and one in five do so successfully?
>>697560380
Yeah, it was really hard at first because we were neighbors for about two months after we broke up. Just the insanity of where I was after and waiting to see a new car in the driveway when I came home from work or class just brought me to a place where I had to have a shit ton of self control. I tried so hard to be friends, but it wasn't fair that he'd come up and kiss me out of nowhere when we were hanging out, and things would sometimes escalade to other things...and the next day it was like I was nothing. I'd fallen so far from this because it just shocked me. This was someone that sparked my soul, and I was never nervous or self conscious around him at all. It was fucking perfect, all of that stupid shit girlfriends and boyfriends do and all the inside jokes and just all of it. But he wasn't over his ex. And he'd compare me to her a lot. Like say, if we were having sex, and I get off a lot (blessing and a curse) he'd always ask me if I really came, because his ex would lie to him about it all the time. Just stupid shit like that.
The reason I didn't want to get into a serious relationship or go that route (it took us a couple months to sleep together) was because I didn't want to punish him for not being my ex, you know? I wanted to prevent exactly what he was doing to me because that destroyed it.
>>697546054
Just got here,don't know if it's been posted already, but holy fuck does it hit hard.
>>697549467
still
>>697553618
>shove the cake onto floor
>call step dad a fucking prick, you'll never be real man like my real dad, etc.
>call mother a drunk fucking slut
>tell family they're a bunch of cunts
>walk off flipping them all off.
Hate to say it but I'd throw that fucking tantrum at that moment. Fucking purposefully setting up their kid to embarrass him publicly? I'd probably fucking stab my drunk cunt mother.
>Fuck this made me rage.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLSzk9z4RFs
>>697554473
>friends are memesters and edgelords.
I fucking hate your friends already anon.
>>697561240
Now for the majority of the relationship it was all my fault. I completely accept it and acknowledge it. Now the one thing that makes it worse is the internet itself. You have tumblr, reddit, 4chan. Pouring advice and input about relationships, people forget that everybody is different in their own right and that applies for relationships as well. She is probably reading this ready to piss fire on me and threaten with child support. Shes a great mom and a kind person in general, but that lets you know how bad i fucked myself.
>>697560126
Get on my level with two
>>697561589
I think that's one of the scariest things about a relationship: believing you can wholeheartedly trust someone. But then to be suddenly revealed to be a wolf in sheep's clothing.
I'm thankful I've never been cheated on. But the idea that someone feeling so close could do that haunts me.
( Sorry, this was a little unrelated, but I really do hope things get better for ya)
>>697562042
man thats rough but thats where we were different, i was never a shit boyfriend, im still no i dont think. I would do so many things for her and i would always make time for her, for instance i almost got fired from my job once because i left during my shift because she was sad because her dog died and i went to comfort her, she has always been my number 1 priority in everything and ive never mistreated her, yet she is still just falling out of love with me. I dont understand
>>697558133
Honestly /b/ro as much as it hurts I'd just tell her to go or go myself. If there's only one sided love then that's a terrible deal.
Leave now. You stay too long trying to make her love you again, she just might end getting a new man, then you'd have to watch that unfold.
>>697562247
>I think that's one of the scariest things about a relationship: believing you can wholeheartedly trust someone. But then to be suddenly revealed to be a wolf in sheep's clothing.
This shit right here. My ex still swears she's not seeing anyone else and that she's just in a period where she wants to be by herself, but I know it's a big fucking lie because I saw her texting some guy, calling him baby, saying she missed him, etc. and she lied to my face about who was blowing up her phone when I saw it.
It's not been that long since we broke up either, but fuck her cause I really don't care anymore. The lying was what killed off all of those feelings.
>>697562670
we are still together and we still love each other its just that she is starting to feel differently, she says she still wants to love me, but she doesnt know if she can. I just need to rekindle it somehow but its so hard because it doesnt feel like shes putting in effort even though she says she is
>>697562541
Look she literally told me she couldnt love me as a lover anymore, both physical and emotional. Now when somebody wants out, is mostly cause they want to be free and beeing free feels good. Half the time they come around, and sometimes they dont. Thats the nature of the beast. But if you truly love somebody then you will respect their space and do what makes them happy. Its called unconditional love. If she doesnt your unconditional love then mentally prepare yourself to do what makes you happy, cause shes happy already being out of the relationship. You'll be the one losing out on other possibilities at hapiness yourself.
My cousin's mom was addicted to meth, so he moved in with my family. then my dad a manic phase and was in the hospital for 3 months. DCF took away my cousin and put him in a family that only cares for him due to money. My dog died, I stopped talking to my best friend. Now my cousin is moving back in with his mom, even though she is still a druggie.
Now I just don't feel anything. Nobody talks to me, and all the things that made me want to keep going in life like concerts and camping are over.
>>697561602
Would the cops really say they couldn't investigate something like that? Especially if the child herself was saying something
>>697559083
This is the reason women are turning into bitches more and more.
>>697562247
Things are going great now, I just keep myself remembering that he didn't really care at all. It threw me into such a boutique of depression and I drank a shit ton after we broke up. Basically all of my college medical essays were written while I was hammered off my ass. Got all A's though. I've toned it down after finding that out from my brother a couple weeks ago, and I'm moving out of state because college is cheaper outside of Alaska. It'll just be hard to fully trust someone in a relationship again, but I'll have a new career with travel money. I come from a pretty abusive/welfare family so being something better than that makes everything worth it. Any feelings I had for him just kind of died when I heard about that shit.
>>697561059
>Spend the next 10 months in a new kind of hell
>Chick I know is a huge slut
>Came home drunk one night begging me to fuck her
>I wouldn't without protection
>MommaDidn'tRaiseNoFool.gif
>She wouldn't let me look for one
>Fingered her off, no relief for me
>Whatever
>Turns out she's ultra fertile
>Gets pregnant with a dude working security at the complex a month later
>Bullet dodged
>Remember my plan to live off just grant and scholarship?
>Yeah, turns out that's nowhere near enough money to live off...
>Barely paying my portion of rent/electric
>Wind going for 5 days at times with no food
>classes suffer
>Living much further away from college and don't always have bus fare
>Bought a bike
>Wind up riding 2 hours one way to get to class
>Bike winds up breaking down
>Walked 6 hours for a Saturday class a couple times when completely broke
>The class: historical WALKING tours...
>Yeah...
>Other couple I live with are cool people but don't put up with shit
>Didn't have much left in them to give
>Been burned by too many people before
>Didn't fully understand then
>Definately understand now
>Time passes
>Should be looking for work to suppliment my income
>Can't work up courage to ask for applications
>I keep berating myself for being a bitch
>Try to muddle through as best I can
>Never ask for help...until my mask cracks
>I'm walking around every single day scared shitless
>No one can help me
>I'm about to fuck everything up
>I AM fucking everything up
>>697556422
Love yourself first. Always.
Fuck it ill post.
>have gf, highschool sweetheart, 7/10, as the story goes
>lasts 3 years, then i dont fucking know.what happened, she started getting more and more intrest into others. Gets to the point where im the only one even trying.
>she crosses the line, fucks this spic that was always trying to seduce her.
>im a dumbass and dont drop it there, im madly in love with her still despite what happened.
>try for a year to fix it until a month ago when i finally accepted that its done with.
>feels like a huge weight off my chest, no longer depressed, off meds, stopped being an edgy cutfag, life is grand
>get a job in tourist town at a resturaunt, new me is determined to find someone new, mostly to rub it in the cheating bitch's face.
>first day
>working alone for two hours. Getting sick of it, its menial labor but it pays (albiet, it pays shit)
>in comes new girl, its her first day too.
>i swear it was like in the movies where the guy sees the girl and the slow music plays and the world fades out.
>Shes fucking gorgeous and im speechless.
>manager introduces us. Were both working the same job. Right next to each other. All day
>we hit it off, shes facinsted by american culture (shes chinese)
>fast forward a week. We pretty close, i give her rides home from work every night. She talks a lot but damn i could listen to her for the rest of my life.
>at work
>its slow, barely anything coming through so we just hang out in our little corner of the kitchen.
>were chatting sbout this and that, suddenly she starts to flirt with me
>"anon, do you work out? Youre really tall and handsome. Most americans are just tall but you..."
>im a faggot, i freeze up. No idea how to respond, i studder out a "thanks" and notice shes blushing a little bit.
>from that point forward im a bit more open and willing to talk, a feat few can accomplish.
1/2
>>697561059
Anymore my friend?
>>697564940
>jump forward to a couple nights ago.
>after work
>i notice shes wesring these skinny jeans and smaller t-shirt that i only seen her wear once but i brush it off.
>walking to my truck, its a clear night, the streets are empty except the occasional group of drunk kids stumbling out of the saloon.
>"anon, i have to tell you something"
>anxiety sets in
>"im going to be leaving soon."
>not what i was expecting
>shes says something about shes not going to get anywhere here and shes going to go somewhere else to find a job.
>she says shes really missed me since i started having to work mornings a week ago (not my choice)
>she tries to make small talk on the way to her hotel. Mostly just talking about my truck which she is starngly facinated with.
>we get to her hotel
>"goodbye anon, i was really nice meeting you."
>my heart refuses, this will not be the end
>work up the courgae to ask her out on a date right there. She just giggles and says goodbye, closes the door, and waves.
Maybe when i work im the morning ill stay late enough to catch her when she comes in.
Sorry about shitty spelling, on phone and i have large thumbs.
2/2
>>697564691
>Back to the pregnant slut...
>Turns out, the bitch is bipolar, too
>AND refuses medication so she can breast feed
>Remember, that's bipolar, pregnant, and off her meds
>The living avatar of Psycho Bitch
>Kicks me out of the room we'd been sharing (she worked 3rd shift so I'd split in the morning for privacy sake)
>Sets it up for the baby
>Not happy, but I get it (and the couch)
>She's had a hate on for me for some time now
>Not totally sure why
>Can't just be the mood swings
>Anyway...
>I come home one day and the other couple have to talk to me
>I gotta GTFO
>Not on the lease
>Someone snitched
>Doors have cameras
>Either I go or everyone gets evicted
>I've got nowhere to go
>Wind up having to leave most of my stuff behind
>Only have two suitcases full of clothes with me, a few books, and a pillow...
>When they drop me off at the homeless shelter...
>Only time in my life I've actually cried myself to sleep
There's a lot more. I can work on it if people are still following. I know it's taking me a while...
>>697561059
I would never get a loan unless I knew I could pay it off rather quickly.
my fucking dumb cunt of a sister had our dad cosign her college loans like 20 years ago or so
Still doesn't fucking pay her shit and it fucks up our old man's credit. She doesn't care, she buys shit she can't afford, goes out drinking with her friends, leeches off our great aunt, buys shit for her dumb fuck wannabe stoner son then breaks it when she gets mad at him, and even steals his money but somehow she "can't" afford her college loans. Then has audacity to ask my dad to build shit for her, he does and is excited to bring it out, asks when he can and she snaps being a bitch saying she's too busy.
I hate my fucking sister
I am such an unmitigated attention whore that I tried to slit my wrist with pringles just because someone rolled trips
Actually, I DO have a certain feel.
I feel like everyone's been lying to me for the past few years. My parents, my friends, some of my professors, people I worked with, etc. I feel like everyone's been giving me a shit-eating grin while lying straight through their teeth, knowing that they're just going to use me until my utility to them runs out so they can ignore/discard me as if I don't even fucking exist anymore. Why do I feel this? Because all of a sudden, this year, it seems everyone I trusted has turned their backs on me. Everyone, even the folks I thought would be able to help me in my time of needing it the most (which is right now).
I feel like I can't trust anyone. My so-called 'family' only talks to me when they want something, and my so-called 'friends' barely even talk to me at all now. Couple that with the fact that I'm seeing everyone I went to high and middle schools with getting married, having kids, starting careers, etc and I'm just 'stuck' for reasons beyond my control, and you can kind of get that I'm frustrated. But, like a Vulcan or a stoic, I can't express how I'm feeling to anyone, because I know they don't give a shit anyway. Can't even talk to my parents, because they don't understand where I'm coming from for the same reason the rest of my family can't: they all love, support, and care about each other, so if one has a problem, they actually work to solve it. If I'm in trouble? I'm on my fucking own.
We could do a feel stream?
>>697565544
Checked
>>697549084
I've been there. Now, four years later, I'm still trying to make it happen since my feelings have changed negligibly and she seems to have gone through lots of shit.
If I could give myself one piece of advice it'd be this: Be less passive. She's been on my mind for all this time and I can't help but think of all the better possible outcomes, including both success and rejection.
>>697563683
Not the original author, but yeah, it's entirely likely. My mom worked in child psychiatry, so growing up, I'd hear stories of the incompetence of the government on these issues. In effect, unless there is either readily visible bruising, or a criminal case against the parent already in process, child protective services do nothing to intervene. Example: Dad of a patient once threatened to kill his kids, kept firearms in house. Dad was well known to be violent, had assault charges in the past, as well as threatening with a gun, and had abused family frequently, regained partial custody after "changing". Child protective services refused to intervene, even when the threat was made, was verified as having been made by the kids, and was filed to them, since there was "no immediate proof that the kids were in danger." I shit you not, between state laws getting worse, and a loss in funding, they just get more and more useless.
>Kissless virgin
>No one loves me, no one cares about me
>Everyone keeps forgetting me, everyone keeps being like this no matter how hard I try
>Trying to get /fit/, I already lost some weight
>Trying to get more knowledge
>Trying to fight anxiety
>Tried to do everything alone
>Trying everything I can everyday
>Even trying doesn't let me beat this shit
>There's that little drop of hope that appears but always evaporates, can't get it stand on its own
>It doesn't matter how nice or efficient you are
>No one realizes that I was the one behind everything most of the time
>No one believes in me
>Depression is destroying all of my progress
>Birthday is getting closer, just 8 days before depressing-hyperbeam for obvious reasons
>Just wanting to disappear
>Thinking on doing some sick flips in the nearest building
I don't want to keep like this all of my life, I really feel like I'm getting weaker with time.
No matter how good I can be at everything, I feel like this is a curse that will never fade.
I'm still trying but I don't know how much I can stand like this.
If I just wasn't scared of dying...
>>697565107
keep going.
>>697565601
Know that feeling perfectly. There's one person I trust, but other than that, I close up a lot, since to me, it's not a certainty, but I can never shake the feeling that for my family I'm simply someone to blame, and for my friends, it's just me being there so they can get a cheap laugh whenever I fuck something up. And I feel you with your problems. man. But you know what? Do what I do. Keep fighting, working towards your dreams, and living on, if only as a fuck you to everyone else
>>697565601
I know that feel.
GF left me, all of my friends have long gone silent, and my only family is two worthless brothers, an 82 year old grandma who can barely take care of herself, and a mother who helps occasionally but lives 1000+ miles away.
One of my brothers is a NEET and the other is a fucking worthless junkie. The only thing that keeps us going whatsoever is me and whatever help I can get from my mom. I really wish I could just pack up all of my shit and move away but I'm in no position for that shit and it would just feel like giving up.
>>697554610
>>697554610
>>697554610
That's some stale pasta
>>697566787
Hey man, shits hard. I'm not going to tell you that its going to get better and all that shit because im sure youve heard that a hundred times. But just know that there are people who care about you, I care about you man, and i know there are others. It's okay.
>>697555361
14 year old me would ask if the pain ever went away. I'd say no.
>>697559083
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
girls live a lot harder of a social/mental life then boys do ages 7-20, if you want to treat them like the bitch everyone makes them out to be then they'll suck
dumbasses like you are the reason women suck
>>697560473
Nice salt
>>697567616
Thanks /b/ro, Sometimes to keep myself up temporary I just need something like that. They always tell me the "its going to get better" bullshit and then leave me there dying alone.
>>697567819
>girls live harder lives
BULL FUCKING SHIT. Women are conditioned from fucking BIRTH to believe they're delicate little flowers/princesses who need to be protected and served by men. Fuck that noise. They're being 'bitchy' or whatever because we allow that shit. We allow that shit because we put pussy on a pedestal.
>girl leaves me
>sleeps with my "best friend", the only friend I had
I'm alone now. So alone.
I honestly don't think I'll be able to trust someone ever again.
>>697568054
no problem my dude, you made me feel better by saying that, i dont know if thats any help to you, but it proves that people making other people happy is a good thing. I'll give you some advice, go out and make someones day not expecting anything in return. You'd be surprised
>>697565033
dude she wanted you to fuck her and you blew it
Fuck it, I'll post a summary of what I put up last night, since I'm not retyping the whole thing. When I was six, I moved to New Hampshire, started second grade, and became an unperson. The only times my existence mattered was a. when somebody wanted my shit, b. when they needed a target for shitting on, or c. when somebody needed to be blamed for something. This kept up for four years before I changed schools. I got about 3 good friends out of that change, two are still my only friends who I actually have faith and trust in, and the other lives in Germany. By the time I was done with high school, social awkwardness wasn't a term that could describe me. Not to sound edgy, but an underlying hatred for virtually everyone is what was there. I literally felt little more than contempt or loathing for most others, no matter their situations. I'm not proud of it, but, after 4 years of that shit, shaping them in their childhood, I think that that's a fairly understandable psychological reaction. I'm trying to make the changes in my life, and turn that shit around, but it's not easy to see people as little more than others waiting for their chance to fuck me over.
>>697568464
>>697565107
>First thing I have to do is get my ID back
>Can't stay at the shelter without photo ID
>Even though I had birth certificate, Social Security card, etc.
>Again, I get it
>But no money and no way to prove adress to DMV
>Told of an agency that could help but could only help people with a verified disability, mental or physical
>I'm skeptical but go through with it
>Takes some time, but get evaluated by a psychiatrist
>Guess what, Anon? You're not a complete fuckup!
>You're a complete fuckup with a medical condition!
>Begin to hate myself even more
>So, anxiety severe enough to qualify as a "disability" (there's a "severe impact on the quality of life" category I qualified for)
>Now I know why I've fucked up (and it still leads me to live a stagnant life)
>Agency is able to help me out
>This starts a trend of agencies sticking their neck out and keeping me from winding up dead in a gutter for the last six years
>Biggest proof ever there is a God in my life
>I'm slowly getting connected to various services
>Start seeing a therapist
>Get a case manager to help me piece my life back together in a material sense
>Get someone to help me find/retain work
>Move up from the shelter to a sort of halfway house
>Have met many people with addiction problems
>Heard so many stories
>Almost live vicariously though them
>Somewhat comforting to be around people just as broken as you
>Like a feels thread
>Often times, I'd listen to their stories as a fly on the wall
>Got lucky (or blessed) none of the pettiness from some people spilled over on me
>Seriously, homeless drama is worse than high school drama but has a hell of a lot more fights
>Back to my journey...
>Be me. like four months ago
>Have this girlfirend, real pain in the ass, but we fuck often so dont mind
>Started to talk to this qt from school
>she likes me and i like her
>started going out and kissing and stuff
>She dumps her boyfriend for me
>I can't leave shitty girlfriend, i dont know why.
>Tell this other girl i do leave my girlfriend
>Either way i tell her i´m going with some friends and "ex-girlfriend" to the beach, planed this ling time ago
>She's okay with that
>We go to the beach for a whole week, fuck like crazy
>Other girl texting fine, says she can't wait for me to get back
>Shitty girlfriend cheats on me, get mad, break up with her and yell at her like crazy.
>Come back home,qt seems distant
>Says she just wants to be friends because i went out with my ex.
>She comes back to her ex
Currently dealing with the fact that i fucked it all up real bad.
(Sorry for any misspeling, english is not my native lenguage)
>be me
>be fag
>like this qt3.14 guy for like 3 years now
>he is a straightfag
>>697568770
Welcome back. I remember you, good anon.
>>697559346
dont blame yourself <3
>>697569173
Thanks. It's nice to know some people out there still care.
>>697569371
They've got me basically tellin' my life story tonight. Hope I can finish most of it before this 404s.
>>697568957
youre a dirtbag, you deserve it
>>697568677
I know, im a fuck up. I fucked up every chance i had for redemption and happiness.
>>697569544
I hope so too, mate. If you listened to me, and cared, then it's the least I can do to take the time and reciprocate.
>>697568838
Keep going ;-;
>>697568217
>pic
only normies
>>697568838
>Got approved for a housing voucher program
>Like a set of training wheels to get people back on their feet for two years
>Still fighting the anxiety
>I cannot cold call people I don't know
>Like potential landlords
>I lock up under pressure
>Still do
>It fucking sucks
>My bacon is saved at the last fucking second
>It's a terrifying trend in my life
>Move into first apartment
>They say your first apartment is always shit
>Yep
>Had no furnature at all
>Just an old, beat up desktop computer and a couple Rubbermaid bins at first
>Thank you, kind sir, who gave me that computer...it helped to keep me going
>Still, it was fucking mine
>No roommates to bitch about what I'm doing
>It was glorious
>Also, finally get a job again
>Shitty fast food, but I was extatic at first
>I'm starting to handle my business like a man
>Shine wore off very quickly
>>697558391
feminist brain
listen to Bright Eyes, you baby faggot
>>697556422
I get the feeling she's Cheating on u or is thinking of it. Some other guy prob sparked her interest. Love your self before you love others and never be afraid to loose them and be alone. Embrace it for it is a real possible reality. Don't make a women you priority, you be the priority. You probably choking her with all the attention. Do your own shit if she don't dig dump and leave her.
>>697548221
gotta call you a new/summer fag, sorry anon.
>>697556422
i used to have a relationship like this that ended about a year ago.
except regardless of how i phrased it she could never bring herself to tell me the things yours told you. at least she can communicate herself to you regardless of how she thinks it might make you feel. there is communication. there might be help for you yet.
now she texts me every few months asking how i'm doing and i have to beat a sensible answer out of her as to how she's doing because she just won't talk to me (despite initiating the texts). it breaks my heart man. i'm sad /b/ro.
>>697570396
>Job becomes something I loathe
>They're overstressing my system
>Only one scheduled to work making hot food for the lunch rush
>Five days a week
>I can't keep up
>The managers can
>At first, they had experience on me...ok
>After a year, I hadn't gotten any better
>Feel incompetent
>Start trying to develop a social life
>Have great conversations with one of the closers
>Dude seems legit, if young
>Eventually invites me over for game night
>Wait, an actual game night...the whole cheezy DnD bit?
>AllOfMyYes!
>Aaaand it turned out to be a bunch of druggies who might play something if they weren't completely out of their skulls
>Tried to party with them a couple times when I could arrange a ride over
>Never quite fit in
>Probably too much of a spaz
>Moderate sized crowds make me very defensive
>Started smoking weed
>Only with them, for some reason
>Wouldn't sell me any
>They didn't want me smoking alone, they said
>Wut
>Fell out with that crowd (but not the dude at work) early 2012
>I got stressed and flipped out because I wanted game night to be Serious Business and not "Come over and watch us do DXM!"
>I never knew I could be this socially awkward before...
>Fuck
>>697568770
Same thing happened to me except from the elementary throughout middle school and none of my "friends" stuck. I luckily got to change schools in 7th grade but I already had crippling anxiety which nobody knew about because "mental illness isn't real" in my country.
They weren't such assholes to me at this school but I still got made fun of by some for things I could not help.
I made a few friends but then I moved countries and they all immediately forgot about me.
>anxiety worsens
>haven't made meaningful or even normie-shallow-friendship conversations for 4 years now in real life with anyone besides family
>gave up on social life, tried to get rid of feelings and emotions altogether
>became zombie, started to affect my grades
>parents threaten to kick me out, dad is even worse than ever before
>calls me all kinds of degrading names and constantly criticizes me
>"anon why are you not healthy happy A+ student suddenly from all my love and support??!"
I'm not as judgmental as I was before; moving countries really opened my mind, but I still have this fucking thing from years of emotional abuse and humiliation that I always think people will hate and despise me no matter what.
>>697551242
Fuck that!
>ask what her problem is
>did something she didn't like
you're beta as fuck, anon.
So you're a kissless virgin, or maybe you lost your girl and now you're on a dry spell.
90% of these threads seem to stem from sexual frustration, and I totally understand. Been there, done that. Had a seven year relationship with my high school sweetheart and lost it all in my 20's. Went on a 2 year dry spell because my ego and libido were obliterated. Suddenly I was garbage to the one I loved most, so my confidence took a nose dive.
Ultimately I took a step back after years of self doubt and realized that I shouldn't be looking for a relationship at all. Instead I had to fix myself. I started biking for 30 minutes every morning in my neighborhood and eating meat and bread in only one or two meals a day. I dropped 50 lbs in a few months and immediately got a confidence boost. Then I got a job to fix my issue of living with the 'rents for years. Bam, I saved over 4k and moved with some friends to another state.
Suddenly I was available. I started a friends with benefits relationship with a girl at work and now I'm in the zone. Making money. No relationship responsibilities, but still have a woman in my bed once a week. Confidence was back in full effect and I started reminding myself that it was all a mental hurdle.
The point of all this?
You're fat. You're jobless. You live with your parents. You have bad hygiene. Your room is a fucking pigsty. You haven't cleaned your bathroom in months. Your cat's litterbox is overflowing with shit. Your sink is full of dishes. You don't have a car. Your knowledge consists of video games and Japanese animation. You don't ever fucking read.
Everything I listed sounds pretty damning. Except all of that can be fixed if you accept responsibility for your own life.. Unless you look like the Elephant man, then you've got no excuse.
You're the pilot in this mortal form, so shape it with your willpower.
Hail Satan.
My whole life is a wreck.
>Be born in some town no one ever hears about.
>Move within months.
>Mom's husband (later found out he wasn't my biological father) was abusive.
>Beat her, threw me across the room as a toddler, supposedly did some other shit I can't really even remember but everyone says it was terrible child abuse. (not that they bothered to arrest him for it I guess...)
>Eventually leave after my mom pops out my brother and sister after 6 years of abuse.
>Go from shelter to shelter for about a year and a half.
>Mom blows money on everything to spoil me for the first part, SNES and all that shit.
>Eventually run out of money and now live in shitty homeless shelters with the bare minimum food we can get from food banks.
>Move to grandparent's house way up north.
>Then the crazy shit starts happening...
(cont?)
have a good sleep and restful dreams
>>697556422
>3 years
This is so sad, really. The relationship has ran it's course, I'm sorry.
>>697572345
I know how you feel, man. My shit lasted from second to fifth grade. Honestly, I can't tell how I feel about it anymore, since, as I posted last night, I don't even give a fuck about relationships anymore. I've got my couple of friends, and to be honest, that's all I really need. It still hurts a lot, it still affects me daily, and it still makes me pissed, thinking about what I might have done had that shit never happened. But, it's part of who I am, and I guess, no matter how shitty it is, I really wouldn't change it, since I don't know how shit will turn out, but it's my hope that this eventually makes me into a better person than I otherwise would've been.
>>697549732
What was it?
>You fat as fuck
>>697573293
continue
>>697557544
Those are lyrics from the smiths
https://youtu.be/c9VVVqN_PJ4
Great feel tunes
>>697572279
>I get called out at one point to meet the neighbors Summer 2012
>Turns out the whole complex is a fucking ghetto
>Fuckton of drug traffic moves through
>One dude keeps having plainclothes detectives knocking on his door
>Something about a pimping case
>Dude was trash, anyway
>Everything goes fine for a while
>I hate my job with the burning fire of a thousand suns
>My feet are killing me at the end of every day
>My knees are in constant pain
>No mats at work
>Every day is another drop of stress in the bucket
>Chillin' with the neighbors after work was good, though
>Everyone seemed to get along
>And then I lost my fucking mind again
>Ragequit my job right before lunch
>Boss wasn't really mad, though
>We both kinda knew it was time for me to move on
>Now out of income
>Had stopped seeing my therapist for a while (I was rather combative and didn't understand how the process worked)
>Still had the woman trying to help me with work
>Back to job search mode
>Panic time; there's not much available in October that isn't seasonal
>I need much more than seasonal
>Keep putting in as much effort as I could muster
>It was a lot more than I had been able to put into job searches previously, so...step in the right direction?
>Still not enough
>Get back to therapy, a new case manager (old one had moved on and never reassigned)
>But the ship is sinking fast
>>697555361
"Enjoy the next couple years kid because it all goes downhill from here for us"
>>697573203
Except I climb frequently at my local gym, am about 5 pounds underweight due to an eating disorder causing a lack of appetite, and virtually all of my issues come from a bunch of psychological scars in my childhood. I fail to see how your bragging makes any of this easier to deal with, so while I appreciate the modest encouragement, that appreciation was raped and killed by both your bragging, and your broad accusations of what our issues are without knowing any of them, or bothering to find out. As such I'll ask you to please fuck off. We're in this thread mostly to support each other, and you sure as shit aren't helping any.
>>697573449
Sleep tight kitter
>>697549955
I know this is 4chan and all… but wow… I don’t know how but I am surprised by this.
>>697573449
Sleep tight kitter
Drink every night to repress the feelings I can't bare to address.
>>697574533
Damn, dude, keep going.
>>697566787
I know how it feels man. Trying so hard every day, putting in your best with no results. It fucking sucks and I'm just so tired of it all. If you can find comfort in anything, find it in the people who feel the same as you.
>>697575498
This sounds like it could be a song lyric
>>697573890
Probably Child Porn
>>697574046
>Grandparents own a farm, 2 acres or so.
>Grandpa is an ex marine and has all sorts of drinking and anger issues.
>Grandma loves gardening, chickens, and typical "Grandma stuff"
>All living in a tiny trailer at this point.
>Start having some problem where I shit and piss the bed and even sometime while I'm out doing things on my own.
>I'm about 8 years old by now.
>psycological issues or something, no one knows why or does much about it... except grandpa.
>Gets crazy pissed about it.
>Starts punishing me in some fucked up ways.
>Ice water baths while he forces me to clean with a hard plastic scrub brush that you would use for cleaning pavement.
>Gets impatient and start scrubbing me hard himself
>Beats my ass with the wet metal wire handle of a fly swatter leaving welts
>Forces me to Write "I will not shit my pants ever again" about 250 times before I can get dinner (remember I'm 7, almost 8 at this point)
>Finally get good enough at hiding that I can escape his wrath
>This ended up continuing in secret for years afterwards until I guess I finally stopped being a nervous wreck or something?
>What's worse is what replaced it...
Sorry, slow typer
>>697573449
sleep tight kitter
>>697574533
Been reading this. Keep going!
>>697573449
Sleep tight kitter
>>697574533
>Shit really hits the fan in late October
>Remember Hurricane Sandy?
>Yeah, I didn't catch the actual storm
>But it combined with a normal cold front to drop five straight days of constant rain
>My apartment was set up like a basement apartment
>Complex built partially into a hill
>Guess who's apartment floods?
>This guy.
>But wait, there's more!
>Turns out, there's some sort of clog in the drainage pipes, too
>Every time my upstairs neighbor dumps water down their sink it ends up all over my kitchen
>And there's not a goddamned thing I can do about it
>It nearly broke me
>I was also out of food at this point (again)
>Had a small netbook
>Would go places with Wi-Fi and spend my days surfing /b/ and listening to YouTube videos
>Got worse when the power supply for the netbook crapped out on me
>Spazzed out and/or had complete breakdowns in front of all of them
>Now I am become cancer...
>Occasionally could get some food from a food bank
>Never lasted long
>Time passes
>I know what's coming
>I've not had money to eat, much less pay rent
>I'm living in a miserable shithole
>It's January
>I'm going to be evicted
>I'm going to wind up homeless again
>I'm freaking the fuck out every waking moment (and some of my sleeping)
>All I can hear in my own head...
>"You fucking deserve it, bitch."
>>697576643
>All of them=all of the neighbors
Can someone post the picture with the guy that had none show up to his party?
Hee
>>697547800
"Get the fuck out of my room im playing minecraft"
gg
>>697561602
Jesus that hit me like a train
>>697546054
>be me
>have anxiety when in car or enclosed place
>psychologist wants to put me on anxiety meds
should I take them? I'm sort of scared of medications
>>697546054
>be in school
>there's this girl i really like
>starting rowing training (sport rowing, not the kind with a big boat where you sit still)
>2 weeks in girl shows up at training
>she comes regularly
>start to get in touch with her cause i'm the only one she know at least a little bit
>become friends
>meet after school, after training, becoming friends
>fall in love with her
>don't have the courage to tell her thou
>ffw 3 months
>shy as i am i can't bond with the other at the rowing club
>she can
>afraid of losing her, mad in love
>we meet less and less
>she get's crazy about litte things and talk behind my back with the others
>feelsbadman.jpg
>we fight and i tell her i love her
>she doesn't speek to me for a while
>ffw another month
>we have a week off school to go to a training camp
>one night we go out for dinner with the whole team
>she sits in front of me
>i'm sad as fuck
>suddenly she smiles at me
>talks to me like how she didn't want to be mean and don't talk to me
>she's getting really flirty
>touches my leg with her feet
>grabbing my hand
>we talk for a while
>all of a sudden she asks me if i wanted to be her boyfriend
>beta as i am i don't know what to say
>"... i..i don't know ... let me think"
>she turns to her friends, talks as nothing has happened
>i hate myself
>after ~10 minutes i get the courage to say "yes"
>" 'yes' what, anon?"
>"i want to be your boyfriend"
>"ask me"
>"... k ... do you wanna be my girlfriend?"
>she starts laughing
>turns to her new friends and tells them loudly so anyone can hear her
>they stand up and go to the bathroom
>come back giggling
>"no anon, why would you ever think i want us to be a couple?"
>they laugh
>everyone
>at me
>i'm dead inside
>>697568217
this is more difficult compared to the agony of attempting to understand the underpinnings of morality and the inherent unfairness of reality coupled with the inability for any individual to make a noticeable change in the world since the age of 5 how? i feel like you just posted some low quality bait
She was my best friend for four years and I had strong feelings for her forever. I was too beta, she got a boyfriend, and I dunno we drifted apart. she was the only person I felt comfortable ranting and venting to.
>>697576643
>I've got another new case manager (people who work with me seem to go on to bigger and better things)
>I mean completely new
>Dude has never done this before in his life
>I get the eviction notice
>We're trying to form an exit strategy
>Thank God for the woman working with me on the job search
>She did so many things that weren't in her department to keep me from the gutter
>They can't do that anymore...
>I actually go to the court date on the eviction notice
>No animosity from the landlord
>I've been a model tenant...just ran out of money
>I got ten days to GTFO for good
>Valentine's Day
>Go fucking figure in my life
>Gather up what I can salvage
>Books, an antique clock, a couple misc. things I can't remember, and two suitcases
>Problem: the shelter's full
>Only shelter in the county
>Very difficult for a "resident" of a county to get into another county's shelter
>Hey, I don't make the rules
>Strings get pulled
>I actually get a bed outside the county in a (relatively) safe place
>Only over the weekend, though
>I'm quite happy to be out of that apartment
>Gas company raped me with some charges I never cleared up
>Hadn't had a hot shower in a year and a half
>Cannot take cold showers
>Only birdbaths in the tub with water heated on the stove or hijacked from the laundry room
>Took the longest shower that night and felt like a new man
>"We're going to get through this, Anon"
>By some miracle, a bed opens up at the other shelter
>The one I had just been at not three years ago
>Had a few advantages this time, though
>Tax return got direct deposited two weeks later
>Gives me a little cash to do some things
>Still job searching like a motherfucker
>Got a new deadline staring me in the face
>There had been cutbacks at the shelter
>One could only stay for 45 days, max
>Here we go again
>>697574811
Sounds like you need Satan in your life.
>>697552976
Damn that's either really sweet or really creepy. Can't decide which. Maybe if he sent $100 instead of $0.01 he would have a better chance
>>697578935
As opposed to men, where by that same age, we're taught that our problems mean shit, we can't open up without being discarded due to "weakness," and yet we're then expected to later shoulder the problems of women with no issue? Yeah, I'd say that is a hell of a lot harder, since we still are supposed to understand morality by that point, and still see actual injustice, rather than "it's injustice that by a faulty statistic women get paid 23% less then men."
>>697576434
>Start having psycotic breaks.
>Getting violent with my brother and sister, hitting them with sticks, running off in the woods for long periods of time (we lived up in the foot hills out in the middle of nowhere).
>At school I'm slowly becoming more anti-social.
>Not even the nerds accept me, get picked on by them but nothing ever comes of it.
>Bottleitupsomemore.stress
>Meet and then summarily get crushed by my first crush
>Little school dance they decided to do one year.
>Finally get up the nerve to break out of my (s)hell and be a little alpha for once.
>Ask her to dance.
>She flat out rejects me.
>Every once of confidence is unceremoniously pushed out of me and I wander off dumbstruck before crying in the corner.
>Some bro tries to come over and cheer me up, gets me to stop crying at least
>weird ass though goes through my head "I like you, I'll kill you last."
>He watches me stare at him sniffling for a few minutes before giving some more words of encouragement and heads off to enjoy the party while I contemplate why I'm even thinking about killing everyone.
>3edgy5me.avi
>Eventually we move out to live with some guy who runs a blanket/puppet store.
>He's a dick but he has vidya so it's ok right?
>Live at his store for a while before we move to a trailer sitting in the middle of his dad's lot full of broken cars.
>Get to travel a bit so it's fun but still being kind of a psychotic nuisance to my brother and sister when we aren't dealing with this ass.
>One day get chicken pox.
>He forces us all in the same room where he has a wood stove and says "this will make it worse but it will make sure you only have it once."
>so we all end up sitting in a hot room, getting our hands slapped when we itch, and feeling miserable for the day.
>Then one he makes dinner.
>Fucked up fried fish with a bunch of the insides still in them, think he only took the intestines out. made sure we ate all the weird parts, especially if we hated them.
>>697579558
I need Satan because I don't have a bunch of problems that you listed, and hate almost everyone due to a shitty hand dealt to six year old me? Seems pretty god-damned legit.
>>697573449
sleep tight kitter
>>697552838
Lucky
I have too many, as a depressed dude friendship is not all its cut out to be. Keep those 2 friends and really get to know them. They're all you need
>>697576874
there you go
>>697579329
Dude...you gotta be more assertive and forward with that kind of shit.
>>697581094
Too late now