Ummm okay, so what's next...?
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Ummm okay, so what's next...?
>>688584088
anon fucked up
Maybe I can salvage this...?
>>688584088
Kill self because autistic.
>>688584088
Okay faggot, what the fuck are you trying to do here?
Wtf dude
I think this one likes me!
>>688584088
please stop
This is bait, right?
RIGHT?
>>688584088
tell her pretty girls make you nervous, and ask for those digits
How do I tell her I'm unemployed at the moment? I got laid off like last month but that's too embarrassing
>>688584642
Dont tell her you're shy when you first talk
Bump!
Anyone???????
C'mon someone please help
>>688584642
>>688584400
>>688584088
>>688585018
I really hope this is some kind of sick fucking joke and I've fallen for this bait. If this isn't a troll, then I am so sorry. You're bound to live a harsh life, good luck.
Hahaha what the fuck.
>>688585018
it's not embarrassing, tell her you got laid off, looking for new job
Hopefully, she understands
>>688585662
I'm not saying that I am an 'expert' at this, but you need to seem more confident. Don't say that you are shy or any of that shit. Don't be, or at least don't act, embarresed if you can help it. Also cut the hehe shit out.
WHAT NOW!?!?!?!?!
4 matches yay!!!
>>688586768
Just ask if she wants to have some fun and add a winky face
>>688586953
BEAM ME UP SCOTTY GET ME THE FUCK OUTA HERE
Abandon thread
>>688586953
how old?
>>688587125
31
>>688586953
Ask to worship her feet.
>>688585662
'not much hehe :)'
>>688584088
You must be one handsome faggot also
>czech'd
Ask for bhole pix
>>688584088
>>688584400
fucking hell mate this fucking cringe....this is borderline *snickers nefariously*
this is actual autism.
Maybe she will take my virginity tonight!!!!!
Dudes say haha, bitches say hehe. Get it right faggot.
>>688587038
FUCK YOU IT DIDN'T WORK
>full battery and charging
my nigga
>>688587315
>waiting to be asked out on dates
>>688587840
Idiot should have just said no its not i just feel like blowing off some steam since ive been crazy stressed lately
This was the only thing I could think of...
>>688587840
>>688588246
dude trust me man ive gotten laid off tinder like 6 times in 3 months this year alone
Git gud fam
>>688588409
mah nigga
>>688585662
>hey how are you?
>not much hehe :)
Well done m8
>>688584400
fuck me i hope this is bait......
this has to be a joke I really hope its just one big prank
>>688588409
Thanks anon!
>>688588911
i'm fuckin dying right now
>Cringing internally
>>688588350
>>688588911
Maybe she's leading into it..?
>>688588350
You fucked up anon
Say goodbye
>>688588350
>>688588911
oh my fucking god is this real life what is happening
>>688584088
Is this a cringe thread?
How do you get laid on tinder? Every conversation I have goes nowhere. What should be in my bio? any tips on anything about tinder?
When did this turn into a cringe thread?
>>688589434
Wow some MILF anon
You can do it !
>>688589727
The moment it started.
>>688589434
Stop apologizing so often
>>688589687
How about actually helping me x(
>>688589434
what are you doing
>>688589434
I wish I was taller
I guess I wasn't breastfed enough
When faggots like this get matches and I don't get shit D:
>>688589434
Ok, I doubt you're actually this beta, but im going to take the bait and go along with it anyway.
These women are atleast physically attracted to you so stop saying sorry so much and stop typing so many messages before they even respond. Just type 1 message, then let them respond, however long it takes, then type another one (or two) depending on how many messages they sent. It's an A-B conversation, not an A-A-A-A-A-B-A-A-A-A conversation. And seriously stop fucking saying sorry, especially for being straightforward, which you really aren't, girls like men who are straightforward.
>>688589825
You're helpless m8
>>688589825
anon this is great. I really hope you arent this autistic though.
this is actually pretty funny op, good job
>>688589825
Being friends won't help, abandon her unless you actually want to be just friends with her
>>688589825
Ask for her hobbies, tell yours, i dunno you're not in a tv show
>>688589825
alright. copy and paste this and you'll get laid.
"look, I've been stressed out lately and I can't think straight. I'm on here for a good time with an experienced woman. Maybe you could help me out?"
bonus points if you add "I'd love to see the way you move :) "
>>688587707
Jesus Christ
OP here and the 31 year old unmatched me! Fuck me, why can't I ever have sex??
>>688589909
Oh look! There's the jealous bitch who will try to derail this thread
>>688588911
>>688589909
lmao ur probably just as beta
>>688589715
Just put random shit in, all I have on mine is;
Once described as remarkably average
I severely dislike anyone who owns a selfie stick
Why the fuck do people make duck faces
Sounds autistic as fuck the more I read it back but it never stops me from picking up an easy lay
>>688586953
>I've never hung out with any women
Surely you didn't actually say that? Jesus Christ anon!
>>688584444
Quads of truth. Do it op
>>688587315
Wow, this is cringe
>>688589874
This
>>688590317
i second this
>>688584088
so desperate....you goofed son
Alright, round 2
>>688590539
Lmfao
>>688590539
now add the bonus
>>688588409
O bet this one is a bot
>>688590539
Gold digger much?
>>688590539
You're good.
>>688590161
man look t this
WHAT THE FUCK THIS IS NOT FAIR
Brothers, this night a fellow autist is starting the journey to abandon Virgin-land. Good luck fellow anon
>>688590769
Gold nigger*
>>688590878
Tell her you can live together with love and fresh water, don't need money
>>688590960
Forget about it, you are just a faggot, an unlucky faggot ---->>>688590878
>>688590878
YES ANON USE THAT ANGER, CHANNEL IT!
Send her dick pics OP
>>688590878
What app are you using anon?
>>688590878
damn, I thought this was gonna be good. no wonder why I'm a virgin too :(
>>688590121
>>688590878
Got tired of all the dicks you took for free?
>>688589825
Please stop putting faces into your sentences :/
I'm so mad now...
How come every girl on tinder is so fucking obsessed with dogs and the same shit, why does almost every bio feel exactly the same, they all follow the same format and use the same phrases and they all want to go on an adventure
>>688590878
post a picture of yourself. we can help you look better if needed
>>688584088
Look who it is again, ID Heaven. I'm fed up with your shit faggot. The other day when you called me a newfag, yeah, haven't forgotten about that yet.
Fuck you I've been on here for months and probably get on here more than you anyways.
Don't you know that you make yourself look like a newfag when you call others newfag?
Just because you learned how to hack your name and change it to "Heaven" does not give you the right to disrespect anyone at any time.
>>688591223
looks like POF (plenty of fish)
>>688591296
Stop making friends anon
No way is OP 21, you type like a 12 year old.
>>688591296
say "friends with benefits, right? ;) "
>>688591346
Yeah, if ur profile picture is just a normie picture u need a change.
Put a shoe on your head or something to standout.
pic please!
>>688591458
this. tell them to fuck off
>>688591516
This
>>688591223
>>688591420
the fuck? this is clearly tinder and OP already mentioned "matches"
>>688591346
No. I posted them a year ago and one anon called me a literal piece of shit
>>688591516
>kek
>>688591321
>if you have a dog I swipe left
>drinks whiskey
>fluent in sarcasm
>>688591296
I hope you unmatched after that
This anon is pure gold
>>688591420
Oh, I've been using that app for 2 months with no luck
>>688591665
just send >>688591516
and you'll be fine
>>688591665
wait, is this chick engaged and on tinder?
>>688588911
OMG too funny
>>688591665
if you're getting matches girls don't think you're a piece of shit. show us a pic of you
>>688587890
Thanks for reminding me to charge my phone faggot
Maybe this one will let me do her...?
>>688591813
I know that feeling bro
>>688591953
The conversation is dying before it has even started
Flirt, keep it alive, do something god damm it
>>688591953
ugh what the fuck man
not only does she look like shrek you've got no fucking game whatsoever
I've never been drinking before, what do I say?!??!!
>>688591953
Dude...
>>688592174
When and where?
>>688592174
say that sounds fun, and ask for her number
>>688592174
wtf is wrong with you?
>>688591813
pof is filled with fatties and single moms, not worth it man
although i've had 7/10s message like crazy on that app
>>688592174
U back alive go all in now!!
>>688592174
>>688592174
She is gonna give ya the booty
>>688592269
this
>>688592174
say yes what the fuck
>>688592174
Be honest, say you don't really drink but still go anyway. She's asking you out, you'll probably get some fuck.
So I need some help, I want to hook up with girls on tinder but I don't know how to steer conversations that way, I can hold a good conversation I just don't know how to take it up a level ya know?
>>688592174
Congrats you are now friendzoned if you want to have a chance don't invite her to drinks unless it feels "right"
>>688592448
tell them you like anime like this guy
>>688592448
There's a reddit about that, also google
>>688585662
>>688584642
>>688584088
Jesus Christ. And I thought I was awkward around girls
>This thread.
Top notch trolleing, my man, keep going.
It's happening!!
>>688592724
Your name is Kevin or Brandon.
>>688592321
What an alternative then? Okcupid doesn't seem to give me much luck either. And I don't really know where to meet girls outside of college. Where I just graduate. Things like this were easier in highschool
>>688592724
No, it's definitely not happening anon your conversation will go no where unless you flirt with her
>>688592724
why would you lie about what video games you play
>>688584088
I want to believe I am getting trolled.....
>>688592904
Tinder
>>688592917
holy shit I was not expecting that
I hope it is so I can get some puss
>>688592724
What a shit taste...
>>688592724
Infinite Warfare? Are you from the future anon??
>>688593052
you ruined it
>>688588409
Das some good shit
>>688592724
Don't bring up anime again unless she asks about it specifically. Do not assume TV or movies equate to anime.
>>688593052
>>688592904
just use tinder. if OP can get matches i'm sure you can
>>688592724
>Infinite Warfare
>recently
>>688591953
>I play videogames, watch anime
Jesus OP how fucking retarded are you?
>>688592917
>>688592724
Nigga... why the fuck you lyin'
Infinite warfare isn't even out until November...
If you're going to tell her you play games and watch anime at least be honest.
>>688586953
Fucking hell, this is just embarrassing
>>688593207
I cannot :(
>>688593106
Shit, I just had IW on the brain for some reason. I sure am byped for it but I meant Advanced Warfare.
HOW TF DO YOU MANAGE TO BE SO CRINGY
>>688593028
>>688593207
But isn't Tinder just looks and nothing else? Like are there actual profiles there?
THIS THREAD
smfh everyone taking op seriously instead of enjoying funny thread
Mediocre bait... but apparently, /b/ is full of summerfags who don't know any better tonight.
>>688593371
Advanced Warfare? Why don't you just play BO3?
>>688593052
You have literally said the wrong thing in every response in this whole thread anon
>>688593348
what do you mean you can't? Are you ugly?
>>688593052
ANON WTF ARE YOU DOING?
Best thread ever
>>688589434
>I love amazons lol
That made my fucking day
>>688593348
>>688593446
tinder is solely a window shopping game. make sure you have good pictures showing your face, preferably smiling. no group pics required
and no there's no profiles in the traditional online sense, it's connected via facebook. only 6 pics allowed per account + link w/ instagram if you want to
Ookkkay, so now what? I don't have a job anymore to buy drinks...
i cant even
>>688593882
Dude, i few drinks and that boooty is yours
>>688593818
this won't work for me. i don't have a facebook or an instagram cuz i have no friends.
>>688593882
"Ok. Should i pay the motel too?"
>>688593882
You are going to get buttraped by her nigger pimp
>>688593882
tell her sounds like a date then, and ask for her number
>>688593052
STOOOP I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE
>>688594100
This will probably land me in puss
I've already tried POF and OkCupid, no messages. Match won't accept me because I'm not religious. I can't do Tinder because I'm not on Facebook. Any others out there?
>>688593882
Just don't fuck up
>>688584088
Oh god, I thought I was bad...
this thread has transcended far beyond imaginable levels
>>688594044
>>688594309
i don't have facebook either. make a fake account, and privatize everything. only upload pics to tinder, and you're good
instagram is optional most people don't link it
>>688594303
say "how about i'll go downtown and you'll hop on this dick?"
>>688594107
This!
>>688593882
>>688593052
>>688594303
Holy fuck kek
>>688584400
Please tell me this is fake
>>688594303
kek, you madman
This thread is great
Someone screen this thread plis hehe :)
>>688594303
If you buy drinks and don't get laid, you just got monetarily used, son. A lot of women use online dating for just that.
Good luck.
>>688594303
A good thread for once
It didn't work...? Anons, I'm horny, please give me some lines so I can do a girl tonight...
>>688594740
i already told you, say
"how about i'll go downtown on you and you'll hop on this dick?"
>>688594303
The absolute madman!
send a dick pic
>>688594740
Say "sorry I just get horny sometimes I'm not experienced with pretty women so I'm sorry if I say something awkward haha xD
>>688593882
Ask mom for money? The puss is right there for the taking
>>688594740
Offer money
>>688594740
tell her drinks sounds fun beautiful, text me (give her your number) and we'll hash it out
This thread
>>688594740
say: I'm sorry,but my dad said if don't get laid soon he will disown me and take away my yugioh cards!
>>688592640
Seeing this kind of shit honestly restores my faith in myself sometimes.
>>688594740
Offer her money for it
>>688594899
this
>>688595034
Start ur own thread nigger
>>688595093
Good idea!
>>688593052
>This is a date right??
I weep for you op
>>688595249
Also say that you're legally required to tell her that you're a registered sex offender
>>688595249
are you seriously trying to fuck that 60 year old hag?
>>688594740
Ask her if she'd like to grab some tendies at your place. You have enough good boy points for tendies and to have a friend over.
Op must be a master troll holy shit
>>688595218
What the fuck would it even be about then? How did that post deserve a fucking thread?
>>688595249
jesus jesus jesus, tell her "But i'd never do a piss poor job cleaning you ;)" girls like that kind of stuff
>>688595412
Lmao
>>688595464
this holy shit it cant be real
>>688595249
*slow clap*
Anon I have'nt laughed this hard in a long time, thanks /b/rah
and to all you faggots thinking this is real, YOU are whats wrong with /b/
Holy fuck it REAKS of summer in here from you faggots
>>688595507
what about "i'll definitely piss in your pores"
>>688595603
i repeat my statement>>688595600
>>688595603
Gtfo
>>688595249
Op is not a faggot, this is some god tier trolling
>>688595603
Who gives a fuck if it's real or not it's still hilarious
>>688595249
OP, no clue if you are just fucking around or actually autistic, but this shit is hilarious.
Keep up the good work.
IT's gonna happen!!!
>>688595710
that's a good one too, go for it OP
>>688595873
The absolute madman
>>688595249
When i first read this, I took it as failing a drug test
>>688595873
Wow!! Goldigger
>>688595873
>>688595873
Say if she does a good job she can have a tip ;)
>>688595873
You should've lied OP, at least claiming to have 10k+
>>688593882
so obvious gold digger
Its so cringey that it's working
OP has reached a new level of beta
This is history
>>688595873
fucking goldiggers man
>>688595873
That bitch is not worth 400 dollars anon.
Go fuck an actual whore instead.
>>688596232
This
I wish
>>688595873
bro imma be real with you, if you're too ugly to find a normal girl who you dont have to pay to have sex with you, you probly should just kill yourself
>>688595873
Nigga just buy a real whore, don't pay even 50$ for that hag.
>>688596341
Say no but that you appreciate Japanese culture and schoolgirls
>>688596413
He's attractive enough to get tinder matches
>>688596341
weeboo intensifies. try telling her something not beta you're interested in, and "lift occasionally" is the gayest thing ive heard all day, just say you like to excersise jezuz
>>688596341
Tell her you are a proper aryan and proud of your race.
>>688594740
Hey OP let me help you. Are you white? If so, stop talking to fucking mudgirls.
OP we need a photo plis make it real
I DONT KNOW WHICH CONVERSATION IS WHICH!!!!
>>688596531
could be using a fake profile with Chad's pics
>>688596341
I really wanna do other things but I am on the edge of my seat watching this shit
>>688592724
Infinite Warfare future trash topkek
>>688596605
same lol
>>688596341
I know this thread is bait, but every time u say something I die inside
Why can't I ever get laid... Literally douchebags have sex every day but a nice guy like me have to crawl. Life's a joke.
>>688595603
Faggot
>>688596598
there are pictures of the girls he's talking to in the screen shots
okay real talk you guys (since we're obviously smart here)
can i get a tinder profile without my gf knowing? in a long distance relationship and am considering finding some pussy in my city cause i'm getting blue balls
>>688596818
then start being a douchebag stupid
Can I get Tinder without a Facebook? I just moved to my college town and wanna smash
Jesus H Christ I love this thread so fucking much.
And hate it. Because OP is god tier trolling and still getting more responses than me!
I get laid often enough, but only 9 chicks outta 40+ matches feels pretty lousy to me!
>>688596886
Bad guy..... u monster
I cannot look away. It's like a fiery train wreck. Keep posting OP
>>688596818
OP you madman we're all trying to get you laid don't worry
>>688596818
You should have said you'll sell some things
>>688596886
nah she'll find out
>>688596886
Fucking manwhore.
>>688596818
it's not only cause you brought money into the equation (what sane woman wants to be offered money like a dirty prostitute) but every word is the most beta shit you can think of. you're just not confident enough, it's not about being a douchebag its about knowing you are a nice person and having faith the other person sees that
>>688597047
Betafag detected or bitch
>>688596818
stop being nice. be human. remember that. you arent being human. be human. honest advice that you can prob understand. youre trying to manipulate her into thinking youre nice when u want pussy. show her you'll fight for her pussy
>>688596818
Dude move on already fuck
Fuck my IQ dropped to 21...
>>688596886
yeah, just download it, and use it, if your girlfriend isn't looking at your phone, how's she gonna know?
>>688584400
>>688596886
Do it
If she ever finds out just say its old and you forgot to delete it
>>688597040
I hope someone shits in your living room you snurd nurgling jew
>>688596818
she's named her price, make a paypal and let's get anon to $1000 to get laid
Jesus H. Christ the austism is real.
>>688596413
Not op, but I think this about myself all day every day
>>688597375
Fuck that
That bitch isnt worth $5 let alone 1k
>>688597375
lmao
>>688597375
or he could just find a girl who doesnt want money and an actual date?
>>688597375
you could fuck 4 hookers with that money
>>688596886
Tinder does not post on facebook so it's k
You are a comic genius. This shit is gold. Keep it up.
>>688597549
and they'd all be more attractive then that cowwhale hyrbid
>>688597549
At the same time? Wow
>>688597549
Or 10 nasty ones
New match!
>>688597375
>102 posters
We could...
>>688597589
kay i'll consider it, i'm pretty faithful so it'd more just to test the waters and see if anyones into me (im bored as fuck all i do is hw and then lay around in bed all day)
>>688597666
Trips..... must follow trip
>>688597682
>pls respond
>>688597682
Tell her you want her civic address, mothers maiden name, credit card info and a blueprint of her house
>>688597682
kek'd at pls respond...
I'm going all in, fellas!
Infinite Warfare recentlt holy shit hahaa
>>688597885
Plz work
>>688597721
GET IN THE NEW THREAD
>>688597721
GET IN THE NEW THREAD
>>688597721
GET IN THE NEW THREAD
>>688597885
YOU MADMAN!
>>688597885
Holy shit op you absolute madman
>>688597885
LOL
on a side note, bitch looks 20 can we get another pic of her anon?
>>688597885
>not even pretending to try anymore
>>688597885
jk wanna hang out a few times on my fleeting dollar, and then have sex?
>>688597721 →
GET IN THE NEW THREAD
>>688597721 →
GET IN THE NEW THREAD
>>688597721 →
GET IN THE NEW THREAD
>>688597682
This bitch has no idea what she's getting into
> hehe sorry!!
> sorry too foward
> sorry
> SORRY
Kill me, if this shit ain't b8 than wew lad
GET IN THE NEW THREAD
>>688597721
GET IN THE NEW THREAD
>>688597721
We may be cringed but think what that girls are taking
>>688593882
>on't have a job anymore to buy drinks...
Then get one at home depot you degenerate
>>688597682
>>688597682
>Pls respond
Stop saying that, makes you sound desperate
GET IN THE NEW THREAD
>>688597721
GET IN THE NEW THREAD
>>688597721
GET IN THE NEW THREAD
>>688597721
GET IN THE NEW THREAD
>>688597721
GET IN THE NEW THREAD
>>688597721
>>688596853
WHAT IN GODS NAME IS THAT
