What's the last text message from a person of the opposite sex say?
"what the fuck"
>>687347505
I love you as a friend
Can't wait to see you tomorrow, goodnight! Xx
>Then I woke up.
Oh yeh right that's cool I haven't been there for ages xx
>>687347505
Baby? What happened? Where are you? :(
"Seen Monday 6:35"
>>687347505
Gulp
>>687347640
kek
>>687347505
Hey Brother, You're dinner is in the oven. I'm off to bed.
>Don't talk to me or my son ever again
srsly
>>687347505
"JA :D" from an ex
>>687347505
seriously why are you even with me you could do way better I'm a mess
>>687347505
"you autistic cock fucking nigger... rape a can"
>>687347505
Ok have a good day tomorrow sweet dreams kiss emoji kiss emoji
For so long I have jerked to your parents but now it's your turn for the ultimate fisting
Hi
"thanks babe"
>>687347505
"Dinner is ready, come downstairs"
call me when you can
>>687347505
"Call me at 7"
>mom
Got this text as I opened the thread kek
vga cable
"Are you passing the big sainsburys per chance? We need milk, and elderflower cyder, and maybe some veg ti have with the fish"
How did my life get to this?
>>687347505
"I'll give you some subs for some h. Pls"
Fuckin junkies.
1800 Ill b ready
>>687347505
U would loose ur virginity to me??
Not the last message but part of the last conversation
Ej sorisori, ni poslalo-.- prsla bom iz centra oz z avtom do faksa, tk da se vidimo tam:))
>Sorry just bad timing
>>687347505
Cooooooooooooome
>>687348699
i feel you
"Says you you're like a needy leech! Haha xx"
>>687347505
When we fucking?
>sent 2011
>no reply
Pic related
On my way home
>>687347505
"woah why did I just get your messages now"
>>687347505
> Metro, hot table
Was at the mall, couldn't find gf after leaving the bathroom
"goodnight xxx"
>>687347505
Nothin much! Finna go to pilates in a minute. Wbu
Said I was grabbin a coffee, I should text her more.
>>687347505
"Why, so she can give me even more dirty looks and give them more of a reason to. Just stop, bye I'll text you later.."
> Is any of your friends looking for a roommate?
"but okay" :/
From mom. She said "Bravo..." after she asked me if I have toilet paper, to witch I replied "Ja. I took one (a roll) when I entered"
Pic related, it's romanian, use google translate if you don't believe it.
>>687347505
Babe i dont mean to break ur heart but sometimes the truth hurts
>just come say hi then
"Please Greg I am scared. Let me go, I dont want to hate you. You made my life hell the last months, I'm scared that I'll go crazy, just stop, please. I didnt mean no harm to you ever, youre a good person and mean so much to me, pls stop"
She got me a pork bahn mi from lee's
"this made me pee a little"
>>687350062
context
>>687350062
Good job Greg you fucked it up
>>687349629
britfag
>>687347505
"I'm going to bed Luv. I left the door unlocked for you though ;-)"
>>687347505
It's Kate!! Are you still in town???
>>687349935
Nu mai chiuli de la engleza pustiule
"Well I didn't, so"
>No that's all on you (Devil emoji)
>>687350062
This was last week, i rly stopped
Don't worry, I already have that video saved
>>687350484
What happened?
>>687350311
Un roman. Primu pe care il gasesc. Ce am gresit? Poate "which"
>>687347505
Some shit about covering her shift, didn't reply because fuck doing favours for women
>>687348800
Subs from Subway?
If you can buy sandwich you can buy drugs.
>> wow how big is it
feels good man
>>687347505
I have been waiting 15 years for that. I will never tell your wife but I hope she finds out.
"Just finished, dropping kirsty off xxxxxxxxx"
Relatively sure kirsty wants to fuck my wife. Also pretty sure my wife would love it although she'd never initiate it. She's disgusted my the idea of have sex with a woman but she's really into rape fantasies and forced anal. So I'm pretty sure if kirsty tied her down and sat on her face it would get her off
It's AIDS?
>>687347740
Fucking hell that pic gave me bit of feels
>>687350827
Subs from YouTube
"Ya know. Open sores kinda a deal breaker for me when finding drugs. lol"
She said work had lots of tweakers and I said buy some meth.
We're fuckin' later.
"love you" from my gf right before she was on the Egypt Airways Crash
"good idea :)"
Beijinhos
"Open Skype and I'll call you" from boyfriend
>>687351009
I don't want this feel
"Ok. Please bring the bins in."
>>687347505
"hey you...we are on a bicylce tour right now and will return on sunday afternoon. hope we will see us next week and hang out at the park, best nadya"
>>687350827
Suboxone, lol. I haven't sold drugs in over a year, and have never sold or even done heroin to begin with. I got it for a few people a couple times at a large enough profit to make it worth it, and a year later they're still finding my number and calling me. No idea how they keep getting it, I even had a different phone just for selling drugs and they somehow found my personal number, I've changed it twice since then and the cunts still keep getting it.
I have this brown powder that looks a lot like good H, I should just tell them to suck my dick and give em a bag of that. The girl that just texted me is actually pretty hot despite being a straight junkie.
"Running late got pulled over"
"You are Crazy"
"Hey babes"
I don't like you
Can't seem to block you on my phone lol.
feelsbadman
>>687347505
"you called?"
"I'll find out baby. Check with Ben E. Keith on availability. Deliveries are off b/c holiday week. Love You"
>>687351561
right. pulled over by a black guy to cum in her white pussy
"that's even better"
“Do it you weenie”
Still haven't done it.
'shes 12'
>>687347505
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8iKuzz5It84
"Can we talk about this tomorrow? This is giving me a headache"
>>687352119
>doesn't matter, had sex
>>687349935
fucking gypsies
>>687350829
"not that big i'm just a tiny person"
"Who said you can talk to me?"
>girl from math class who hates me
Schlaf gut ;)
Trying to figure out my life again. Bout to throw the towel in.My roommate brought his ex girl back home last week.. she's lost her mind after being on a drug binge and has
basically chased me out if my home.
whats this supposed to even mean bros??
>>687347740
"Mainly just eating, weathers been awful :-("
<---What I suspect she's been doing
"Hey, how's car fixing?"
>>687347505
>At the light from hell! Lol!! Traffic bad
"I just want you to leave me alone."
"Ok then let me know immediately!!!!"
>I love you very much :*
feels good to be loved :)
Any day now
Save...Mike pays for them, just need the upcs
"I mean you kinda unfriended me"
Kein Problem. Schlaf gut ;)
My buddy saw me drive by with his sister the other night and tweaked out and this was part of the conversation between me and her after
>>687347505
Go away from my Window.
I'm still in the tree in Front of her Window
>>687347505
That's why I originally wanted to do biomedical engineering
>>687349935
What skin colour are you even? Brown?
I got pink eye
"Ya, I just really want your dick" not making this up /b/ros.
"I plan on ripping your shirt off of you later ;)"
"So, what's the deal?"
> "Okay whatever. Next time I will cancel immediately"
>>687347505
who is Thad castle and why is that ur name?
"I wish I was here with you."
"We're each other's energy drink
Hahahahaha"
gf :3
>>687347505
My grandma wants to read your book lol
"okay"
>>687356621
Long distance relationshit detected.
Protip: someone else is with her now.
"HAHAHA"
>>687356834
well.
that's depressing.
"cause my cousin is at uni"
>>687357180
LDR are pointless, you will always need a lot of physical contact.
Cool
>>687347505
"good night"
it makes me happy
>>687347505
>Can't make it this weekend I work
Basically she isn't interested in fucking me anymore, unless it's her that proposes seeing each other. We're only friends after all
>>687357479
true.
still depressing as fuck though.
>>687348553
fucking marry her
>>687357656
Find yourself a local, nice and kind girl to cheer you up when you miss your LDR gf ;)
>>687357823
Marry the 'shit' out of her.
>get it? You get it.
>goodbye ;_;
>>687347505
no problem babycakes
"Stop posting my fucking pictures on 4chan you stupid asshole"
>>687358230
I got it, you want a beer?
From my girl
"My bewbs are soft"
Anytime after 7 is good with me
"I don't fuck obey clowns"
Please stop, you're worrying me, also stop texting me.
I told her I'm breaking three laws at once, intoxicated while speeding while texting.
Women don't give a flying Fuck about anyone but themselves.
Yes but not today
>>687347505
no tang
>>687347505
the gorillas ded
>>687358600
Hurrdurr
My little sister is hotter than I am so stop trying to get me wet
Thumbnail looks like Spider-Man's ass is above them
"im busy"
" Merci!! :* "
Haha, oh noo
"Okay sweetie, I'll get dressed then."
>>687347505
Hi how are you doing
message sent 1 30 pm
Fine and you
message received 8:00 pm
>>687358532
I could go for that .
>bear me victor
>>687359649
RIP
>>687359451
A cocktease huh? Am I guessing right? She won't fuck with you, is just a friend, but is this kind of lovey-dovey overly familiar friend, yes?
>>687359649
>"happy new year 2007"
nah its "we're already at the theatre you need to wake up bitch",
absolutly 0 interest
Bye
>>687359801
here ya go buddy
Too bad Anon. Your loss
>men, we don't know what we did
>>687360129
No, she's my girlfriend you miserable person
I miss you, daddy. why won’t you talk to me?
chupa meu pau seu bando de filho da puta
Not a text but close enough. Did I do good /b/ros?
"Can you pass by the pharmacy on the way home? My nose is blocked :-( I need nose thing, thx babe don't drink too much :-p"
>>687360396
Thanks Victor
>>687347505
I don't love you, I never loved you, and no one will ever love you. Who you are as a person is just too weird.
Welterusten Casper
>after 5 missed calls
>omg you ARE dead
>>687360559
Merde!
>>687358600
such a badass please fuck my girlfriend
Haha wow, you are up early! Luckily for me dogs usually need to go out mid day.
I'm trying to see a bunch of cities - Dublin, London, Paris, Berlin, Stockholm. Have you been to Europe?
Sounds good, when are you free?
>I havent responded yet. Its a girl I met on Tinder
Got any cp you wanna trade?
Shes a slut
>>687360694
damn
Gn, homie
Oh, I won’t be back home tonight. Sorry, I don’t mean to blow you off, I know you made a nice dinner and everything for our anniversary but I’ve just been catching up with my old friend tyrone and I’m going to spend the night at his place. We can celebrate together another time and I can’t wait for that present you got me, thank you so much! You’re the best! <3
Dinners ready
...
...
...
It was my mom.
>#trump 2k16
i am okay with this
"So you're still working?"
No, Im actually not. Lied about working late. This was 3 hours ago. I just don't want to talk
>>687361165
Nice B8 M8
://
>>687360680
You're delving into friend territory. Stiffen up and act a little bit more asshollish and that bitch'll be riding you day and night.
Im a robot. I dont receive messages from people of the opposite sex.
>>687360680
Try not to use to much smileys, i mean if its a nerdy grill go ahead but if it is a normie grill try to not use ":3"
>>687347505
I love you (heart emoji)
I wanna cuddle with her so bad
n o
>>687347505
Sweet dreams little prince
>>687360680
>smiley faces
>that weird :3 shit
>shall
>her use of 'aw'
Unless she's as autistic as you, then sorry, no. You did not do good.
On the off chance she entertains your offer to go to the bar, she's either going home alone, or leaving with some other dude. Likely after you bought her a bunch of drinks.
Last test message from the opposite sex was this:
30 minutes
>>687347505
>sorry I went to bed early last night but yeah I had fun too and thank you for a great time (:
inb4 went on a walk date with this cute mixed girl.
4'11 skinny body cute face amazing tits gainfully employed
wifing material
"<3 <3 <3"
>>687347505
"alright"
This chick is into some weird stuff.
Kik- sexykateyh
"I know, I'm just joking 'Laughing emote' "
Skype in five?
>>687361611
I am not sure what is wrong with using "Shall" but thanks for the advice.
>>687360680
You shouldnt have said you would BUY her a drink
you could just say that you should get a drink together to celebrate or something like that without sounding like a beta who spends money on women
yeah, buying one single drink isn’t bad but dont let any women consume any more alcohol out of your wallet unless she is back at your place getting totally hammered
my personal rule is that i never spend more than like 3 dollars on the first date, and if she doesn’t put out i dont spend anything more until she does. for each time she puts out she earns another three dollars
>>687361760
How do we know this isnt an attempt to raid?
>>687361457
How do I go about acting more asehollish?
"she posted one at like 5am of her leg all cut up and bloody and i was like omg what happened"
>>687362451
using shall is fine with a lot of girls. a lot of girls talk like that as well, so it doesn’t come across as weird
it really depends on the kind of girl
>>687362472
kek
>>687347505
You're not very sympathetic to me being sick, considering you're the one who got me sick hahaha
>>687361502
She is a nerdy grill, but I can totally lessen the usage of faces. Thanks bro.
Nationalsocialism is dead
>>687362692
It is just the way type and talk in real life. Thanks for clearing that up though.
I've never had one, I only get spam texts.
>>687347505
Sweet, I've got a good text for this I met this girl in a club last weekend.
I would be open to something like that. What about Sunday afternoon at like 3? I'm pretty busy this weekend. I already have something that evening. If that doesn't work there's always next weekend too.
>>687347505
>schlaf gut :)
this it says sleep well
Ummm You’re like average... I guess?
>>687347505
"Son, you forgot your watch"
Pic related
>>687347505
"X"
>>687347505
>no
literally that's it
Crazy ex
>>687362472
Pretty solid advice man, I really should of said it that way, will say it that way in the future. Thanks.
>>687363265
Bro, you got shot down.
It was nice seeing you today hope next timr with [another girl I'm friends with] can come to [my city] to see you ;)
>>687363320
Story?
>>687363437
I know
>I'm sorry you ended up doing all the graphs.
>>687363265
Speaking for myself here, everytime I can remember using sickness as an excuse to get out of something I have been faking
Maybe that’s because I dont get sick very often but take from that what you will
>>687363320
Story?
We never got drinks together :(
>>687363493
Crazy ex texted me, pretending to be another ex, so I would flurt with her, so she could show my wife and I would be forced to love her.
>>687363534
Yeah I know. I think more than the sickness it's that she made it sound like she was cancelling a dentist appointment rather than a date.
I'll never hear from her again. Oh well I'll try another girl. Maybe one day find a gf....
>>687363520
Keep your chin up my friend. Ask out as many as you can and you'll eventually get one. Being shot down is just part of the game.
"Daniel i know it's not your responsibility but i could really appreciate a friend right now. I am alone on the street. St. John's and 35"
I'm not Daniel, nor do I know Daniel.
i think it was like "LOL OMG I WAS HAVING SUCH A BAD DAY THIS MADE IT 10/10 BETTER"
it was in response to a link to a video
that's the second time in row she said something like that
i'd really prefer if she just ignored me instead of a shitty response like that
>>687348699
Elderflower cider?
Nigger you live in middle earth?
>>687363801
Thanks m8
"You keep playing with people's emotions and then act like you don't know what you're doing and lie about it"
This is still fucked up.
>>687363874
Not the guy who posted it, but I presume he is a Britbong like me.
I don't want to see your dick smh
>>687347505
How big?
>>687350829
How big is it in inches anon?
"on my wayyyyy"
>>687363589
See
>>687363730
>>687363874
Fuckin lol, I didn't say anything but thought the same thing when I saw that
>>687347505
how r u? :)
>>687347505
"Nah just a casual slap of the penial region"
>>687352935
Looks like the cunt could crash at your place. Shave your balls.
You didn't answer my question! What time do you want me over? I can help you set up if you want
HAHA that’s even smaller than my boyfriends! Ugh... thanks for waisting my time you lying asshole
come over!
>>687364648
>being this much of a typical women
>>687350829
That cock is disgusting
"You're the one who was driving drunk in the accident that killed your sister and father, I should have aborted you"
-my mom
godnatt och sov gott
>>687358986
"But i don't have your little sister's number"
No cause I only slept for 3 hours but I am tomorrow
>>687361000
A slut and creepy pasta lover?
Keeper!
>>687356649
She's hot, any more?
>>687361457
A chick who's already friendzoned you is trying to help you not have it again?
What a cunt/bro
>>687347505
For a second there I thought spiderman was crouched on the bedside table.
Nothing, just a pic
>realised last sms from a female is from december
>>687361518
>I wanna cuddle with her so bad
Stop being beta
My opinion is "fuck his gay shit"
But I truly hope you realize the consequences of your actions, and learn for the future so you can avoid hurting others the way you hurt us
>want to help me study for my cumulative? i'll buy coffee :D
tfw actually am a tutor and can tutor her course but a charge money
women think being hot means they can get things from me
i'd rather masturbate than work and not get paid
>>687363747
She might be down to fuck another time, so keep trying with her, you have nothing to lose.
But also move on and find other girls
>>687366286
everyone has those days where they blow off even the people they like so they can relax or whatever
even though things aren’t looking great with her, there is still a chance
>>687347505
i love you
It was amazing talking with you, but I am tired and very excited to dream. Good night
>>687347505
AND you're playing but not against me!
no I'm busy sorry
>>687366809
Dat relationship life!
My man.
"What a dweeb"
We were making fun of someone
"So have sweet dreams *blush smiley face*"
"im so excited" - anons gf
Nah fam u good my nigga
"That's my favorite Capaldi interview!"
(Referring to this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XM2bXjs0n2g )
"Yay!"
'Slap my Harriet Tubman"
>>687367360
Dat married life. It's pretty good.
"Haha"
April 19th
"Train tomorrow or Friday?"
Unfortunately I won't be train on either of those days
>>687365431
Kek ya thats it alright
>>687366809
Pics of wife? Or is she a landwhale?
>>687362491
Dont have to do anything with that information. Just lurk
"They didn't have titos so I got Malibu and absolute. Eh it will do lol And if both don't fit an extra one for me! Muhaha!"
>Talking about getting booze for get together this weekend
>>687368141
Landwhale
>>687347505
And you?
>>687368526
Titos is a fraud
'when is the warcraft movie'
"I'm v lucky you're mine, goodnight cutie bum"
>>687367902
christ that's depressing
"I don't know how I will manage xD"
female friend telling me she has to get up early tomorrow, sent 2:30am.
>>687348043
Jonas?
>>687368809
Why?
why did you text me at 4 am?
>>687347505
bacons ready xxxxxxxxxxxxx
>>687368984
forgot to mention, attached with picture of her close to being naked
>>687347505
Don't do drugs anon's nose
>>687368632
Pussy is pussy i guess.
>>687349935
holy fuck what a cool language, never actually seen that. i know almost all of those words from other languages.
I'm back c:
it says "muh dick"
>>687355033
fuck, tell her it's "me neither"
>>687350062
>tfw name is Greg
>inb4 geg
