ITT: we all live in an apartment together.
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
ITT: we all live in an apartment together.
>Keeps to myself while working and enjoying my various hobbies because I'm not a faggot memeing redditor.
I'm hungry
>throws the chairs out the window
Someone take out the trash
>>686811954
Dibs on the bathroom. You all need to get through me if you want to use it.
Do you all agree with the roommate agreement?
>>686812846
>shits on the carpet
is that a piss jug?
Shitters clogged
>>686812717
one two three not it
>>686811954
i call the master bedroom. if any of you faggots comes in ill break your toes.
Jim can come in though. I like jim.
>>686813127
NOT IT
>>686812717
>Burns trash can
>>686813127
Not it
Someone get the door, some newfags decided to crash this bitch.
GET DOWN THERE IS A SNIP-
ffs i hate you guys, and btw my parents are coming over tonight so please clean the shit from carpet
guys lets throw a party
OH SHIT
>>686813503
your parents can't come tonight i'm having a party
>>686813064
>Sets shit on fire
>>686813503
Buy some fucking toilet paper then, and I wouldn't have to use the carpet. Cheap ass.
>>686813503
your hot mom is coming over? CLEAN UP MY FELLOW MOTHERFUCKERS
>>686813712
no
>>686813601
CAAARL
>>686813885
if you want to be apart of the gang-bang then you clean
WHO THREW OUT MY CUMBASKET?
Hey Jim, remember that one time you asked me to fuck your gf and i was like,,,FUCK NO.
The answer is still, FUCK NO,
>>686812490
Kek'ed hard.
>>686813601
hey guys im back from wor-
>walks out slowly
>>686813628
if you invited you gay friends again i'm gonna burn your room
Who left their porn on the couch?
>THAT guy locked in his room doing speed for days only leaving for work
>always courteous enough to flush the stash if party van shows up
>actually have a job so im not a junky fuck hiding it in the drawer n getting everyone busted
phew
>>686813601
>>686813885
HOLY FUK
COME OUT OF YOUR VIRGIN CASTLE AND HELP WITH THE FOKING FIRE
who the fuck ordered 200 empty boxes?
Who wants some coke?
>pulls brick out of backpack
For the last time, I am not showing you my tits!
>>686814381
we were missing a room, so i'm gonna build my own
>>686814244
the strippers are already here m8
ALLAHU ACKBAR
>>686814350
How long did you leave your ramen cooking you idiot?
>>686814496
like 20 mins on the frying pan
>>686814488
>>686814326
GIVE ME BACK MY CP
>>686814417
just pretend you didnt notice me seeing them while you change your top right there infront of me,
>>686814481
JA
>>686814407
My man try some this instead >>686814330
>>686814669
>>686814481
you know OP is a jew right....not cool guys,,not cool
>>686814463
Can I get some of those boxes? I need to ship my parents some coke.
guys i'm leaving to do some shopping, do someone want something?
>>686814835
a jew with no taste apparently
>>686814925
depends, what are you willing to do to my penis and anus?
shit im so nervous for this dinner tonight that i spilled the spehgetti
>>686814947
a fleshlight will do me good
>>686814947
cheek spreaders, the dentist probably sells it
>>686815073
damn Adam, just get some coke to chill out
>>686815073
Dominos never fails
>>686814947
New chairs because of >>686812490
Also paper towels because of >>686815073
>>686815124
you can take mine, used it only once
>>686815208
on it m8
Why is there a little girl tied up in the closet?
>>686815396
which one?
>>686815396
you ruined your xmas present..fuck
>>686815380
thanks m8
>>686815350
i bought towels yesterday but you had to fap to something
>>686815019
I'll suck ur dick for a box, but I won't touch ur ass, that's just gay!
>>686815396
first of all thats a boy
hey guys, who wants to see my manga collection?
OK! WHO STUFFED THEIR MEDICAL WASTE IN MY PILLOW?
>>686815472
don't bother with left one, it's rebecca she works here
>>686815073
Fuck man, we had no spaghetti... which one of the hairy femanon things just menstruated on our clean floor? Lick that shit up!
>>686813086
Stay away from MY jug
All right who left their jizzrag in the bathroom?
>>686815553
Sorry, i bought some new hentai DVDs from the thrift shop
>>686815617
got any elfin leid?
Ok who ate all the milanesas? You fuckers
>>686815617
you can show it to us when you lose your virginity
FOR THE LAST FUCKING TIME MARK, I WILL NOT AND SHALL NOT SPANK YOU AND CALL YOU HONEYBUNS.
>>686815745
so THATS where i left it, thanks man!
>>686814947
Bring me a coffee please
>>686815867
MARK IS THIS THE TRUTH?
I THOUGHT WE HAD SOMETHING GOING BETWEEN US SINCE WE MOVED TO THE SAME ROOM
who wants to have a gay orgy in the living-room?
>mfw living in said apartment
>>686814350
its not that bad. Just put a poster on the wall and we'll still get the deposit back
Allahu Akbar
>>686814947
Lube.
20ft rope
2 puppies
and pillow.
>>686815501
thanks anon, it's just what I wanted
>>686815605
That's not a problem, I'll just leave it in that dress n fuck her ass.
>>686816030
Marks a whore, don't believe anything he tells you
>>686815807
do body pillows count
WHO PISSED ON THE TOILET ROLL FOR FUCKS SAKE
>>686816265
not me i shat on the carpet
>>686816220
I'll make bodypillow from your ass if you don't throw this shit out, you know you are not the only one living in this room?
Guys... why is the FBI here?
>>686816265
i will buy a new one chill bro
>>686816063
I'm in, but my boytoy has to watch. He's young and doesn't know how to take a good dicking yet.
>>686816574
they said they will just check if we don't hide any coke and to ask some questions about...
MARK?
>>686816461
dont test me
Okay, who keeps leaving their snacks in the PC room?
who wanked in my coffee
>>686816726
we can teach him
>>686816726
i swear if you do this in the living room i will throw you both to one room with him
>>686816826
>>686816265
I only piss in the sink, unless I'm shitting.
Im horny, whos up for fucks
>>686816981
fine by me he's hot
Dear 4chan,
It's me, Bobby Harwood, once again. Except this time it's the Bobby Harwood speaking.
We are finished with your child pornography, gore, and cruel jokes that spread like a snakes bite and ruin the internet. Where have all of the internet's problems come from? Reddit? 9gag? No, no.
Here.
Tonight at 12:10pm Pacific Time 4chan will officially come to an end.
"kek u cant do sh*t"
Not only do I have my hacking skills and team aside me, but I also have 9gag, the founding website of Anonymous, aside us.
You're probably all thinking
"DARNIT GUYS WHAT DO WE DO"
There is one thing you CAN do. Surrender. I want Moot, Heaven and Hiroyuki here, with the ID and everything, saying sorry, and banning all of things disgusting things from your website.
As of now, you have 3 and a half hours.
The clock is ticking, gentlemen.
I am legion.
I do not forgive.
I do not forget.
- Bobby Harwood
Who ate all the doritos?
>>686817148
fuck off or ill slice your dick off
>>686817148
wrong thread nigger
>>686811954
WHO FUCK THAT
>>686817148
Kek you can't do shit
>>686816981
Well, it isn't an orgy w/o atleast one bear, tho he is a, little, young for my taists for a top.
>>686816826
i got your back nigga
>>686817148
get this shitter outta house or get him to your gay orgy guys
Holy shit guys, who's cum bottles are these?
>>686817287
>ate
>>686817524
>>686817455
>>686817435
>>686817385
>>686817324
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TLe_aAh-cFg
He is for real DARNIT GUYS WHAT DO WE DO?
can my wiffu stay the night?
>>686817689
Oh fuck.
>>686817689
MEMES IN REAL LIFE
>>686817689
oh no's im so scared!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>686817656
New years cum guy? He's pretty cool, he cums in bottles and doesn't afraid of anything.
A year or two ago he made some jewelry that was filled with his cum, was pretty funny.
>>686817148
Dude, I set up the security, if u hack in, ill let u rape me n my family, its in the contract. That being said, I have a lot at risk here, so I made sure to do it right, good luck.
>>686817689
FUCKING SHIT
>>686817993
Watch out, he is serious
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TLe_aAh-cFg
What a sick fuck.. We better hide
>>686817768
only if she sucks my dick
>>686817148
>>686817689
Bobby stop! This is madness!
>>686817689
FAMILY MEETING
GATHER AROUND
We have to come up with an idea how to hide a body
>>686817148
I'll take that little angels ass! Come here sweetie, daddy will take care of you. And remember to call me daddy, or ill get the electrodes out.
can't pay the rent this month - so glad you're cool about it
who put the baby in the dish washer
>>686813639
>>Sets fire on fire
Are there any traps in this apartment?
>>686817689
OH NO WHAT DO WE DO
>>686818276
let's put him in weaboos room with therest of the bodies
>>686818521
FUCK OFF WITH YOUR TRAPS
>>686817689
>>686817148
THIS IS WHAT TO WORRY ABOUT
can all the fucking 12 year olds get out MY apartment already? i dont want to get the pink snake out again
>>686818404
Well where else am I gonna put Archibald?
>>686818702
i bet these 12 year olds are the "memes in real life" kid's agents in disguise
>>686818315
BITCH WHAT
>>686818404
shhhh
>>686817689
>>686817899
>>686817966
>>686817968
>>686817993
>>686818005
>>686818140
>>686818244
>>686818276
>>686818287
Lets comment his videos so he stops hacking us
>>686818847
Its bobby harwood
>>686818855
whoa man nice dubs
where did you get them?
>>686818658
my body pillows will surely cover them, if anyone finds the body i can slice them with my katana
>>686818880
on it m8
>>686818937
BOBBY HARWOOD IS A MEME
>>686817689
MEMES IN REALLIFE
lets raid this kids youtube channel
>>686819118
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TLe_aAh-cFg
Ok
>>686818463
>pisses on fire so the fire stops burning the fire
>>686815694
Found the newfag
I took some paper towels anon thx
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TLe_aAh-cFg
MEMES IN REAL LIFE
21
>>686811954
Could someojne take care of my 12 year old sister, aperently someone bunred the kitchen, need to clean that up. Also who let the chad in ?
>>686818855
sorry hun, had to spend my money with Tyrone, but at least your double dubs cover it <3
Just a heads up guys, in about 5 minutes I'm going to go ahead and unleash about seven million demons upon the planet through the basement, so try not to do anything to attract their attention, STEVE.
>>686818702
Hey, my boytoy is 8, so he's staying with me. When does the orgy start? If not for awhile, I'm going to get a rimjob
>>686811954
schwarzen = black
neger = black
Arnold Doublenigger
Hey guys could you keep an eye on my chocolate milk for a few minutes? I'll be right back. Thanks.
>>686819565
>falcon punch
>>686818975
i let donald trump fuck me in the ass for them
>>686819565
i took my eye out and kept it afloat on the chocolate milk
>>686819453
How well does she take dick?
>>686819488
these dubs wern't cheap bitch, you best take off those pants and bend over
>>686819565
I took a shit in your milk... Sorry, man. Somebody burned down the kitchen, and I normally only shit on linoleum.
>>686819565
>>686819635
>>686819823
Hello anons how..
WHAT THE FUCK DID HAPPEN TO THE KITCHEN!
>>686819967
all i know is it started with fire and got worse from there
>>686819967
Robert was making cum-soaled-eggs, he didn't know the lube was flammable... He's in the ER.
>>686819565
HOW THE FUCK???!!!???
>>686819898
well i didn't have a shower since i left Tyrone's place. You're such a good friend that you will do sloppy seconds ;-)
I'm cooking dinner... Who's hungry?
>>686817148
BOBBY, YOU GET BACK IN THE GARAGE!!!!!!
>>686811954
Can you faggots plz wash your dishes? who put a dildo in the freezer?
>>686820514
shut up and take it bitch
>>686812846
Dibs on this guys ass... you have to come though me if u wanna rape him.
Hey, hey anon look i stole femanons panties
WHO THE FUCK BUYS UNFROSTED POP-TARTS?!
>>686820778
Cant we just share?
I don't think we're getting our deposit back.
>>686820616
That's mine, I like cadaver dick and finding a stiff one is really hard.
>>686812717
>pulls you to the curb
>>686820725
i love the attention but i wish you were as big and wide as him. Its ok to read my book while you do your thing, right?
>>686820809
Dude, that is mine, I crossdress 4 work
>>686811954
THATS IT FUCKERS I NOT PAYING FOR THE WIFI, IF YOU WANT WIFI GET YOUR ASSES TO THE MC D'S (the one with the swastika in the bathroom and several child abductions) AND USE THERE SHITTY BLOCKED WIFI
>>686811954
look guys I have paid my rent up until the end of the month but I am leaving tonight , sorry , I can't take it anymore, oh and I have been masturbating in all the food containers left in the fridge which have no labels on them.
so yeah , bye and thanks guys
*leaves*
>>686820459
We should cum on Robert's bed
Sup guys. I'm your new roomate. I brought a present. Who's gonna hit this with me?
>>686820307
Dammmmmanon who would pay this bullshit and
WHAT IS THIS? SHIT ON MY CARPET? WHYYYYYY WHYYY ALSO PISS? WHAT THE FUCK
I LEAVE I LEAVE THIS APPARTMENT.
>>686821427
>not mustard gas
Not strong enough for me anon, sorry
>>686821231
its fine i already finished
>>686821311
Shit my bad
>>686821427
ayyyyy
Who borrowed my dragon dildo and returned it covered in shit?
Seriously, Anon, clean up a little in here.
[Oooo, can I borrow your bunny slippers?]
CAN EVERYONE SHUT THE FUCK UP I'M TRYING TO MASTERBATE HERE!
>>686821386
you're paying for the wifi or your taking it up the ass
>>686821793
Let me suck that for you anon, I'm hungery and the fridge is full of shit, not even cum-soaked shit.
Guys Chris Hansen is at the door what the fuck should I do???
>conjure satan
>>686821520
just another day in paradise then, be round at Ty's place, also your mom called needs the number for Ty's dad because he forgot to give it to her. Love you xx
>>686822185
let him in and we will all bombard him
>>686822185
Yell him he's got the wrong house
>>686822249
You fag that obviously cupcakes.
>>686822185
I've trained my whole life for this moment...
>>686822185
let chris handsom in
SHITTER'S FULL
>>686822185
murder him
Lets establish a occult cult
I vacuumed the fucking floor yesterday! There is shit FUCKING EVERYWHERE.
And throw out your condoms for Christ's sake.
>>686822185
offer him some cake
Anon, why the fuck would you buy 562 Coldplay albums?!?!?
guys i threw carl out the window.
>>686822722
WE DON'T EVEN OWN A FUCKING RECORD PLAYER!
>>686822722
>>686822840
im going to throw them all out the window. I wonder if i can hit 500 people
I'm bringing over some guests. We'll stay in my room and we won't be very loud, just don't bother us
>>686822185
Chris Hansen: Hello sir, may I speak to the trap of the house?
>>686821944
dude, the neighbors don't password protect their wifi, I use that instead for most things.
>>686821386
you better contribute something, how else am I suppose to run my ecommerse business at a profit?
>>686822727
CAAAARL NOOOO!
>>686822727
Finally, somebody's starting to clean up this pig sty
>>686822920
i shat all over your room along with my 24 dogs
>>686822920
Can i watch?
yo anons, mind staying away from the bathroom for about 1 hour? im constipated as fuck and sticking things up my ass doesnt help. Don't worry, after this im buying laxatives so ill always be the quick one
>>686823001
>>686823005
dont worry youll be next
>>686823066
i bolted he bathroom door shut
>>686822379
>>686822577
>>686822642
We have spoken.
>>686822185
Let him in so he can die.
Has anyone seen my dog?
>>686823037
Sure, you can join Carl on the bed
>>686822500
Oh S H I T THE BARRIER BETWEEN 2D AND 3D IS BREAKING
THE BLESSED TIME HAS COME FOR US TO LOVE OUR WAIFUS
Oh hey, look! Beer and classic rock?
>>686823279
DOGGY MADE GOOD CHOP-CHOP
>>686823287
GOD DAMNIT WHY IS HE BACK I JUST THREW HIM OUT THE WINDOW
>>686823268
Only if we rape him first tho
>>686823279
I ate him suri
Why is Chris Hanson tied down naked on our shit covered carpet with a dildo up his ass!?
Put a pet door over that glory hole! I know we need to make rent but it's cold outside.
>>686823470
ok. ill get he baseball bat, knife, duct tape and rope
>>686823449
Next time throw him out of a window above the first floor, dumbass.
>>686823224
oh shit oh shit! i can feel my intestines getting expanded. AUHUAUHUA IT FUCKING KILLS, thats it, im doing a shit over the bannister, and its going to be rock hard constipation shit that'll kill someone and it'll all be your fault!
>>686822500
What was the training like? Can I offer any help?
>>686823529
Who cares? Imma yank that place holder and drive him to Pound Town.
Guys why the is Aids Skrillex at our door now?!? I'm more scared of him than Chris Hansen.
Le me screaming aloha snackbar
>>686823529
He was going to take my boytoy away, I just got him and haven't broken him in yet, tho he isn't taking off his wig or dress anymore.
>>686823668
I have a Mr. Potatohead kit. Save that turd and I'll make a cop.
>>686823825
hey scum
>>686823602
too late anon, we already got him. BigNig got him with his 4' dildo
>>686823439
>>686823479
God damnit. Quit eating my dog!!
My 15 year old sister and her friends are coming over. Friends dad is a cop so don't fuck around
>>686823935
Hey faggot
>>686823799
Just wait for the money and work the glory hole. All dicks are Anonymous when you don't look at customers. And FFS wear a diaper! You've been drooling on the furniture since Jamal tore your piles.
ate chan
>masturbates furiously in a corner
Oh god Aids Skrillex busted down our door with a chainsaw, fucking run!
>>686823924
fuck you! im already in the shit launching position ready to launch 'the brown meteor' and now you decide to give me an offer?! kill yourself!
>>686824140
>Friends dad is a cop so don't fuck around
We'll pay him as usual. Nothing wrong with Officer Friendly pimpin' on the side.
>>686816063
Count me in, but first i have to get my latex suit on, be out in a few hours
>>686824140
By "don't fuck around" you meant fuck all of them relentlessly, right?
>>686824140
Ok, so we give them bars before we rape them, this time.
>>686824275
At least let me get my catchers mitt!
There's a Jew zombie at the door now!
>>686824106
LEE NO EAT DOGGY. JUST COOK DOGGY.
What'd you fuckers do to my bed?! WHAT'S IN THE BAGS
>>686824140
we'll do to him what we did to chris handson
>>686824443
He's no zombie. I'm dealing meth on the side to pay my share of the rent. He's just one of my customers.
>>686824412
>Ok, so we give them bars before we rape them, this time.
Da fuck? Didn't you read Iceberg Slim? Work the ho's, then reward them. Fuckin' dumbass whitebois I swear....mumble...nig....grumble.... shit...
>>686824441
Hes backed up, you have time.
Why is there some random black kid in my room?!
>>686824561
>>686824601
My inventory. Don't fucking touch it.
NIGGA HOW THE FUCK IM SUPPOSE TO SHIT!
WHO THE FUCK DID THIS!?
>>686824601
Good lad! Throw him an incentive freebie while you are at the hole. He seems a personable chap.
>>686824706
Shit how did he escape my closet....
hey guys, movie tonight is tommorow, you get a choice of Daisy's Destruction or The Grifter. Vote in the strawpoll ill put up later.
>>686824695
Ready and waiting! I hope it's a solid snake.
Hey boys, So I here Jesus likes to party
>>686824712
Is I okay if I borrow two linen cloth?
>>686824958
MOM!
Come meat my roomies.
>>686824958
Hear* you autistic trap
>>686824638
dude, i spend all my money on lube and peanut-butter. I don't have money to pay off the cops till next week, and rapin a cops daughter is going to cost if she isn't dtf.
guys Jesus is at the door
>>686824903
Either is fine. I LOVE romance.
>>686824958
come near me and ill cut your fuckin dick off
WHO THE FUCK ATE THE FROZEN SHIT IN THE FREEZER
>>686825166
Well, tell him to mow the lawn.
Anyone need an extra as a fucktoy?
>>686814648
I noticed.
>>686825099
That's OK, he'll settle for a turn at the glory hole. You won't spend a dime and you'll get a hot meal.
Easy one too. He's from West Virginia and has a penis like a cocktail frank.
>>686825372
I think it was my tweeker customer.
>>686825372
I was hungry as fuck. Don't judge.
>>686824958
join the orgy in the living room, i see several anons fluffing already.
>>686813130
Thanks fam.
>>686825455
Shit, I'd wife her in a heartbeat. adopt babbybois and raise a happy trappy family.
We have that spare bedroom now that I got the blood stains out of the carpet.
Who stole my panties this time?
Not cool.
>>686825535
No judging here. Should I eat peanuts for the next one?
>>686824706
oh thats my slave jamal... no idea how he got out of his shackles I'll be taking him now sorry for intrusion
>>686825489
well, i'm not sucking his dick. you think we can get his daughter to suck him @ the glory hole?
>>686825824
Tee hee! That was me, sugar. I'll return them after I wash them.
What takes out shit, blood and semen?
>>686825824
Sorry I need them more I can't go to work with out undies
>>686825912
Cut his other foot off.
>>686826040
Try leaches.
I also need that dildo.
>>686824958
Only boys?
>>686825455
>>686824958
>>686826132
I'll buy you some. Mine are special.
>>686811954
>Idea for an MTV series, "big /b/rother."
>>686826197
>I also need that dildo.
Shall I install it for you? Regular or habanero lubricant?
Thanx fellow anon!
>>686826366
I got it. My pussy needs to be treated with care.
>>686826260
Your Gramps is pretty hot in that photo. Why did he quit showing up for our Crisco parties?
Can you guys help me pack? Got myself a new apartment.
>>686826510
I love the way you write on money after I hand it to you. So romantic.
>>686826643
Take me with you.
I know one of you faggots took one
Hey guys I'm your new roommate i justt transferred
>>686826734
Sure if you help pay rent.
>>686826792
I'll return it after I cum. Promise.
>>686826792
Sorry, i was curious
>>686826643
HE'S RICH!
Tape him to the chair and we'll find out his stash.
Hey 686826643, have you ever had your shit pushed in?
>>686826792
Fuck off I had every right to steal one since you stole my black thunder dildo
>>686826643
I got some gas, where's your stuff?
>>686826853
I'm poor. So, how about I give you boobs and butt whenever you want?
>>686826853
Take me with you too?
>>686826734
ANOTHER holdout! More tape and another chair. We're going to Disneyland!
Well, after a side trip to the hog farm.
>>686826792
Well I had to find out if they were big enough, you REALLY need bigger dildos.
>>686826953
Good idea. Pour it on his bitch ass and maybe he'll fess up his stash without a bonfire.
