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I feel like shit Feels thread

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 292
Thread images: 93
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I feel like shit
Feels thread
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same.

How you holding up, /b/?
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>tfw 30 y/o virgin
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omg thank my penis i actually did all that, dont worry op every teenage first love is porn :D
>>686200502
>>
My brother committed suicide a few months back
>be me
>play video games with my bro all the time.
>fast forward to 3 months back
>weve gone our desperate ways for a while now
>at work
>get call from mom
>reject call, im at work
>shift ends
>call her back
>my brother took his own life
>goto funeral
>his gf is there
>with a new guy
>she looks like she doesn't care, even flirting with the new guy
>end of service, I gotta go home
>before I left I donkey punched her
I'm drowning my pain with vodka and pain meds
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>>686200502
Than go here and slap some Asian titties
http://www.streamboobs.com/asian523/
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>>686200502
there is a board.
The board is called /r9k/.
you should go there right now bcuz people like us DON'T GIVE A GOOD FUCK.
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>>686202357
Yeah sleeping is my favorite part of the day. I struggle to fall asleep a lot though, and then the next day is even worse tired.
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Thread theme:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K41kIS_Wl94
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>>686200502
I had teenage love, I had the most beautiful girl ever, she was perfect. I don't have anymore

I'm not sure which fate is worse
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>>686202009
holy shit anon, I feel for you
how are you doing now?
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>>686202930
sad but beautiful
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>>686202812
>This song
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Trying to make this thread alive, at least for now
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>>686202930
But why did he die? From shock?
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>>686203600
This picture gets me every fucking time. Fuck I hate everything
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>>686203898
don't know mate, perhaps it was a greater purpose, like Giving /b/ some feelings, for a moment
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>>686200502
I recently drank a milkshake
1 minute later, I barfed it out.
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>>686202812
>becomes a normie at 20
far from a good theme song for a feels thread
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What are you drinking /b/?
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>>686202009
Don't worry they will both go to hell
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>>686203028
Underrated food for thought.

Had all I wanted/needed and more, but broke up with her to man whore through highschool and what little college. In 20's now..she won't ever want to be with me again...anytime I imagine going out or wanting to meet new women or think I deserve a good relationship my subconscious always shoots me reminders I had it all and wasted my shot.
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>>686200502
I had a really intense teenage love. Started at 13, that's 16 years ago now. I was a super jealous and insanely horny kid. Kind of a monster really, just selfish really. I wasn't as good to her as I should've been, always worried she's get with someone else. I also was getting really fat because my family's dietary habits were finally catching up with me. It made me feel really insecure, particularly since she was probably out of my league (blond hair, blue eyes, super fit, gorgeous big eyes..). I cheated on her twice with an uglier chick, mostly because I was a selfish asshole and always horny.

Anyway, eventually I started hearing rumors that she was hanging with this other kid. This skinny wormy shit-kid who worked at the grocery store. We were 16 by this point. She denied it, promised me she'd be with me forever, but I kept hearing stories. He started eying me in school in his wormy little way, like he was fucking my girl and he was proud of it.

I tried to fight him in school. I tried to fight him in the grocery store parking lot before someone called the cops. Eventually my girlfriend stopped talking to me. Stopped denying anything anymore and just wanted me to leave her alone. We never broke up, she just stopped wanting to be around me. Eventually it was clear she was with Justin now. I went into a tailspin of depression. I tried killing myself because I didn't know what else to doe. Twice, once with pills once with a knife (wrong way down the wrist, woops!).

I dropped out of high school and got way into doing cough medicine (DXM). Literally every day. As well as playing video games.

I was almost 18 before I got normal again. Joined the army, got a new girlfriend who later would cheat on me when I got deployed. Thankfully it only hurts that much the first time, after that you almost expect it.

I'm married now. I believe my wife is loyal but there's an itch that I'll never know for sure. TL/DR? You didn't miss much.
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Hold the Door
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>>686204448
Svedka vodka and OJ, what about you?
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>>686205159
Exactly same story here. Every girl I've dated since hasn't measured up to her.

I still keep in touch with her, so I hope I'll someday get another shot...
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>>686205593
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>>686205798
way too true
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>>686205374
Grant's whiskey. Tastes pretty weak but its the only alcohol I have right now.
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>>686205593
Sounds like we are in the same boat. At least finding and accepting the solace of loneliness has its perks. I know what and how emotions are, but I've become in control of when and which ones are used and in my case none and never cause what is the point of dreading over the past when I can stare at nature all day and pretend there's so much more out there, but thanks to this idea engraved in our brains that we need to find another half of our soul that may or may not be real will always leave uou wanting more/better, feeling unfulfilled like you're failing... I don't feel comfortably numb, but more in between not knowing what the true meaning of comfort is and just acceptance of it all.
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>coming down from my 5th cup of coffee today
>my body feels weak from only having one early meal and so much caffeine/sugar
>begin to feel the pressure of bills being due at the end of the month and fullfilling other responsibilities
>I just want to go home and get drunk but I don't want to be alone
>too introverted tonight to go to the bar and socialize

Let the existential crisis begin
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>>686205218
im going the same path as you, but got thrown into jail at 18
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>>686200646
not good
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>>686200850
I stopped caring a few months ago
I'm 26
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>>686207428
what's on your mind anon?
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>>686200502
this one time i had feels so hard....it hurt
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can someone rub my vagina? i need to feew bettew
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>>686207217
what for?
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the worst of all is to still been in a relantionship with that person that means all to you, and everything change life smack you back...nothing is the same not even love
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>>686208360
my gf broke up with me, i found her on the street took her at gun point she was 17, her dad sue me
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>>686203600
This is exactly the reason why I'd kill my dog before I kill myself. I don't trust anyone to take care of her anyways.
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i shit like feel.
Sleef thread
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>>686202009
Shit anon, I'm sorry man. She deserved that punch. Take all the time you need, but eventually, get up for him.
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>>686202812
fuck
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>>686208974
Jesus. Don't do that.
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>>686200502
My face when OP's a little bitch
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You know /b/ is the mirror that I hate looking into but can't resist, because it's the only one that shows me what I really am.
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>>686210239
WAKE ME UP
WAKE ME UP INSIDE!
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>>686210293
I CAN'T WAKE UP!
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>>686210377
>>686210523
>>686210563
stop samefagging
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>>686210377
Forgot to add : "who would win" threads
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>>686200502
>Dated a bunch of females in my time (late 30s). Not a whole lot but enough.
>Was married and divorced.
>longest relationship lasted 8 years
>Never felt much for these women and relationships felt like a hassle.
>meet a girl who has same interests as me.
>Unfortunately its long distance.
>Visit each other a few times.
>Old enough to know this is something different and I actually love this girl.
>Our personalities just fit, we are both calm, introverts, who enjoy quality time inside.
>We had talked about moving close to each other but not in together.
>Save up the money for the move and apartment.
>Today she tells me she is scared (it's her first relationship) She was fat as hell until about 5 years ago she changed her life, lost the weight, and got healthy).
>Isn't sure I'm "the one" but loves me and still wants me to move close to her but she is just terrified of losing her independence.
>All of this I understand, accepted, reassured her that she would still be able to do what she wants, and so fourth
It just hurt like fucking hell for some reason.
Why did it hurt so fucking much? Shit like this never bothered me in past relationships but today I was totally crushed and heartbroken and it wasn't even that bad of news. I feel like a fucking pissy little shit of a panzy for this but it's my first ever real feels.
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>>686210972
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>>686200502
hes ugly as shit and smelll like shit and he dont know one to know hes ugly so hes ugly as shit and smell like shit and he bothers the popular people and hes ugly as shit with that stupid ugly face of his and bother people cause hes spoiled by his parents that also think hes ugly as shit and people think hes ugly as shit and try to bother people cause he is lame and think he deserve to be the leader but ugly as shit and serve us our cheese burgers n has to be nice to get things
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Right now I feel like shit. I'm considerging killing myself, but Im not 100% sure. My mother doesnt loves me in any way. She wont stop insulting me, and it makes me feel like I am not worth living anymore. She even told me she wont let my brother make the same mistakes I did.

She have prohibited me from hanging out with my friends. They were the only ones who could make me change my mind. Now I am here, planning my suicide and let you fucking fags know about it. You might even be laughing or just thinking this is fake, that Im a new fag seeking some attention, but no...Im not. I really want to find an exit out of this shit hole, and the only bright light out of this tunnel is a shotgun to the head.
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Girl tells me she loves me, however wants to stop talking to me because she still feels for her ex, I don't know what to do, I love her too...
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>>686211613
and hes ugly as shit and has no friends and want to be the leader but ugly as shit with his stupid ugly face and has no friends and try to hurt and kill popular people the ugly way with stupid ugly freak magic
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This one won't take much. I fell in love at 13, circa 2002. She was Korean-Portugese, and her parents were uber Christians. About halfway through the summer, she suddenly stops responding to all of my chat requests (texting of the early 2000's, for you young lurkerfags, we know you're there), phonecalls, etc. Turns out her parents found out I was Jewish (yes I'm a kike you degenerate faggots gimme all your shekels) removed her access to electronics, and moved to fucking south Korea. I eventually get over it. About a year ago, I saw her again. We met again in a cafe, just for coffee break. She was going to the local kommunity kollege, and I was going to the not kommunity kollege. We get to talking, and I eventually fall for her again. Well, about two weeks ago she went to a party. At this party there was heroin. There was also whiskey in mugs. She downed a whole mug and got so shitfaced that she overdosed on the heroin, or just the alcohol. She died, although I think the people at the party thought that she was just unconscious.

Help me /b/, I've reached the point where I cannot physically bring myself to cry anymore.
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>>686200502
@OP, I'm so glad I didn't miss out on that now, lol. I didn't even think about that being a problem for some people. Feel bad your yall tho
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>>686200502
and hes ugly as shit and cant get girls and smell like dog poop and is ugly and deny all the ugly people losers dont smell like shit and they like shit and is ugly and cant get a women and smell like shit and is ugly like the ugly guys losers
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Well, I feel better and worse continually everyday, anon. Life is scary, I fear that if there is some divine power watching over me, I've already fucked my chances at something great. I've never hurt anyone, I went full /b/ a couple of years ago and basically fapped to everything, it changed my perspective on life, I isolated myself, had next to no sex life. I really let go of myself, and I hate the person I once was, holding on and regretting shit that never once impacted me. I've thought about suicide, and I won't go through with it. My life is pretty much perfect now, I have a good job, friends, few girls I could establish something with, but all I go back to is how disgusting and broken minded I was a couple of years back. I've always had my family, but it doesn't save me from the anxiousness, paranoia and depression. My brain chemistry is truly fucked. I've had one event in my childhood that still gets on my nerves, and I was bullied during secondary (high)school. It's all over now though, I'm an adult. I tell myself I should stop being a pussy, but hell, it's so much easier said than done.

I kind of regret coming to /b/, but I keep coming back because of you all, you guys in this thread. We're all here for a reason, all have skeletons in our closet. I just want you all to know that even people who have things right can be suffering, no one is normal, just smile /b/, you're bound to change someone's life, but until then? We'll just keep making feels threads.
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>>686211303
Trying to find that Girl Bro.
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>>686211906
As fucked as that whole experience is if you were with her it could have pulled you into heroin and other crazy shit. Grieve for her death but there's a good chance you could have died with her if you were closer
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>>686212471
You're saying you still hate your life even now that things are going well for you and your life is pretty much perfect. Sounds like you're dealing with some kind of depression. People always hate to hear this but try to get help man or there's a good chance that nothing in your life will make you happy.
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This cant be a feels thread without the black birthday guy, where is he?
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>>686211613
Screw your mother. Don't let others bring you down anon, as hard as that is. Maybe get a job if you don't already have one, save up some money and move out. You will change your life for the better.
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>>686202930
What was the song?
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>>686213146
Don't do this to me
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You know that feel when you're just sitting at work and everything is pretty OK, but thinking about it, you have nothing to look forward to at all.
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>>686212904
Ah, anon. It's funny, in a way. Self-conflict is what's plaguing me. Once it's all perfect there's time to reflect on what was. I couldn't imagine what my family would think if they found out about the stuff I used to view and shitty fetishes I developed when I didn't give a fuck about the world, and how those things change me. I'll seek professional help if I have to /b/ro, not working right now, waiting to start my new job in June. When I'm not working it's so much harder to cope, because there's not much to apply myself to. I'm completely different to what I was, but some stupid part of me is locked on what was and what is now. I've never hurt anyone though, my head is just completely fucked up. What do you think? And what's plaguing you?
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>>686211613
Im joining the navy here soon, you should also look into it. prove you mother wrong and show her you can do better things with your life then she could do with hers. Go to college afterwards and live a long happy life you cant let others bring you down even if its your mom.
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>>686200646
Fucking horrible. I've been super drained of any sort of mental energy the last few days, and my depression has been fucking me up the ass without lube. My current gf is "asexual", and that's been really wanting me to just break it off. But at the same time, she's one of the few people who've ever shown any type of interest in me, the ultimate betafag. There is this one chick, but she has mental issues, I.e. depression, and is my best friend's ex, and bros before hoes applies, and I just wanna die, /b/. I'm sick of being alone, sick of feeling this sorrow and loneliness. I haven't killed myself because I can't find a foolproof and painless method of doing so. That and I don't want to die a virgin.
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How do i stop from feeling so numb all the time, im only 18 and nothing excites me, im a social outcast and have no clue what im doing with my life at this point, any advice would help.
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>>686213574
This is me, BTW.
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>>686213850

That's life pretty much until you die

If would say that there's hope but let's face it, we're all on 4chan all day, there is nothing else for us
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I feel nothing anymore. I think I'm a facade of what I once was. I've accepted it though. My girlfriend, my roommates, my job. I really don't care about those things, and even though I love my girlfriend (been with her for 7 years now) I don't think I actually love her on an emotional level. I think my love for her is simply on a "humans are social creatures" level, and in order to not go completely insane, I need somebody to talk to. She fits the bill.

I don't know how I feel about anything anymore, either. My mind feels broken, but it feels more clear than ever before.

Anybody else feel this way? I'm curious to see if there's anybody else.
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>>686213484
At least you were never a bad person. You might have been into some weird sexual shit but if you haven't hurt anyone then you can't criticize yourself too bad. Besides like you said you're not into that shit anymore. Fuck the past, I've hated who I was at times but I'm more proud of who I am now, so fuck how it used to be.
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>>686213850
Ah, anon. At this point in time you should realise the world is your oyster, seek opportunity in things. Don't end up like me, falling down the rabbit hole, resurfacing and feeling completely broken when things are right. Where are you from? If US or UK, grab a college loan and pursue a career, or hit up community college. Do whatever is available to you, seek a job, a career, start lifting, you'll find that people can be met anywhere, and that everywhere provides an opportunity to do shit. Don't tell me you're a NEET or any of that shit, you've got nothing to lose. When you're around people "fake" confidence, big yourself up in your head, because fake confidence is still confidence, and you'll grow to realise that. Life is seriously something you can shape to your standards. Stop telling yourself no and start telling yourself yes, get yourself out of the fucking gutter and stop being a faggot, and do anything to reach that point. Guides are lying around, find the solutions. Take it easy /b/ro, I hope this helps. If all goes to plan, you'll meet a qtp2t in due time, and will think about nothing but the future. God speed, and remember, we've got your back /b/ro, you'll always have us.
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>>686213574
If she is the one bringing you down then you should honestly leave her if you don't think that she can change in the near future. And if you really want to lose your virginity you should look into one night stands with random girls that you might find at clubs even if its not your kind of thing, its the only thing that comes to mind right now.
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>>686207016
Im sorry
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>>686200646
I put my pupper down today. Second time I've had to do this and it doesn't hurt any less. A piece of me died with her today. Trying to stay distracted but I feel pretty empty.
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>>686213850
I can't tell you how many people I know who are 18-19, aren't excited by things, and have no direction. It usually turns out that after they hit an almost rock bottom they suddenly realize what it is there suppose to do in life. I feel empty as fuck and don't know if I ever will feel any different, but I almost have to believe that I have some kind of purpose that will bring me out of this and I think you will too.
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>>686214804
Yeah, I know I probably should, but at the same time, I just can't meet any new people. I try to talk to new people, and I just freeze up. My spaghetti falls out everywhere. No one really hangs out with me outside of my small group of friends. And I'll probably never find someone willing to fuck me. Not unless they're a hooker. And I honestly want my first time to mean something. I don't want to just meet, fuck, leave. Although I'm so desperate for affection that I might just give in to that temptation, find out if sex helps the pain go away.
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Im dropping some deep quotes to help everyone out of this deep depression.
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>>686215148
rip in pepper pupper
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I am so terrified of living and I dont know why. My therapist says that ive gotten comfortable in my depression and shes right I have. I dont want to do anything but I want to want to, yknow? My new meds make me feel so numb but they help me focus with school so I dont know. I dont want to die /b/ros but I see no other way out.
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>>686200502

>Join dating site
>Browse members all across the country to find the right girl
>Start talking to girl in Texas
>Beautiful
>Meet her for the first time, had a great time
>We start a long-distance relationship, with her flying to my part of the country, and me flying down to Texas several times a year
>Help her with PTSD from being raped in college
>Everything about her is great, except her personality; she's very abrasive
>I make an effort to try to work with her personality and pray endlessly so her heart changes
>Doesn't happen, but we stay together for 2 and a half years
>We mutually break-up
>Months later, she finds another guy and gets engaged to him
>I hear nothing from her except taunting texts about how wonderful he is
>>
>universe
>late
>early
>world

etc.
>>
/b/ros listen here, your severe longing for female companionship is due to societal pressures, and not at all what you "have" to do to live a fulfilling life. in fact, being this sad over women only gives them so much power over you. If you become a "wizard," become the best goddamn wizard you can be. the only one who matters most in determining worth is yourself
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>>686213315
Yeeeep
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>>686213315
Replace work with school, and you got me.
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this video helps me not feel like shit.
https://youtu.be/Fu7O1UZwkSk
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>>686200811
Well yeah at this point this. Most of it is money problems, but my older brother left me broken. The mental is physical torture was too much. I have absolutely 0 motivation to make something of my life
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>>686201038
I never understood if this guy wanted actual friends or not, or if he's just doing it for his dad's peace of mind.
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does it count if its not your own experience? Anyway here's this
>used to work at an outdoor grill style restaurant
>we get a lot of parties, birthdays, reunions, that type of deal
>one group in particular was this bunch of old guys in the 60s or 70s
>not sure what their deal was, old college buddies or soldiers or whatever but they were just a bunch of old bros
>complete gentlemen too. tipped well, never complained or made any moves on the waitresses so everyone loved them
>theyd hang out on the patio on the same table for hours laughing and drinking and telling old stories to anyone who would listen
>made me happy to see them all happy and hopeful my friends and I would still be that close one day
>one spring day one of them shows on right on their usual reunion time
>he sits happily waiting for the others
>two hours go by and hes still by himself, looking worried
>go over and ask him if he needs anything
>"no no, Im all set thank you...I have some friends coming soon.....they should be coming"
>they never fucking show up
>watch him stare silently at the sunset until it gets to closing time
>without being told he quietly gets up, gets into his car and drives away

God speed you poor old bastard
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>>686215379
Tinder my man. Nasty pussy is better than no pussy.
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>>686202009
Good on you. She's an asshole
>>686204449
Whoa, she's only an asshole. I don't think people should burn for being bitches. And I didn't read shit about the guy leading her on more than what she was doing.
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>>686219152
Yeah, but I've posted my picture already, who do you think would fuck me? Especially once they realize I'm a weeb furfag.
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>>686204448
Rye and Coke
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>>686202633
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>>686204448
Nothing, although I wish I was drinking vodka mixed with a bottle of meds.
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>>686204320
How about
https://youtu.be/hUE-ic_Q0g4
>>
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>>686215148
Sorry buddy, I can't even think of a proper way to try and cheer you up. I miss my dog so fucking much.
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>>686207016
If I was in the continental US and in your area, I'd drink with you. But since I can't, here anon:
>Pic

I hope you feel better.
>>
>>686221663
Me
>>686207016
Also, I'm right there with ya buddy.
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pgNf8ZKEXFE
>>
>>686210377
I mean that's basically all of /b/ so
I mean there's a reason its here and not on the other boards. The question is anon, if you think its cancer, why are you here?
>>
I'm still in highschool ( mods mods mods blah blah blah) but I really have no plans for colleges or anything I know my parents want me to go but there's nothing that interests me really and if it does the outlook or usefulness for it is super fucking low. Like everyday it feels like I'm good today but then other days it feels like just end me please. Like starting a few months ago I can't like shake death from my mind. Like I know everything is going to end and I can't control it. My mind feels like a freshly polished broken mirror I guess for lack of better words. I feel like there's this hole constantly in my chest . Like trivial things I used to rub off get to me now. Thoughts on what's up with me?
>>
>>686200502
>be socially awkward all my life, never held down a job longer than six months

>treatment resistant depression and GID which doesn't respond to CBT

>dont plan on doing anything about the GID but living with it and ive been on atleast thirty different medicines and none work

>use kratom and stims to suppress feelings and give me an OK feeling

>family on verge of kicking me out for the kratom use and would rather have me on suboxone.... which took me a year to get off of the first time around.

>have to constantly hide shit from everyone even my therapist and doctor and friends

>seriously cant handle anymore
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>>686200502
FUCK YOU
>>
>>686202633
Same here. At this point, I pretty much just sleep all day now, which is perhaps where the difficulty in getting back to sleep comes from.
>>
>>686222049
Hiding shit from your therapist and doctor may fuck you over a wee bit.
Niggas can't help you if they don't know what the fuck is wrong with you.
>>
>>686213552
Don't. Just don't. He will definitely kill himself because I can tell you with XP that when 1 fag gets a little power, he makes your life hell. Like what Anon's mom does, but he'll be bound by a contractual agreement for years.
>>686211613
Also, link could be related
https://youtu.be/eDVkkwl6aJo
Don't worry anon, just do what you have to do. To survive. I don't know you, but I want you to live. If there is a chance you can be the change you want to see, you should try.
>>
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>>686222931
i have told them in the past and their advice is bad. at this point its just going through the motions.

the therapist and doc are best ive found but regardless.

the psychiatrist/psychologist cant do anything else now that ive been on every possible combo of medicines....

therapist wants me to just come out to everyone and transition but fuck that lmao id rather die slowly with drugs
>>
im 18 and im trying to make music, i have confidence that i can make it and know what i wanna do but i lack incentive to delve deep into learning how to organize eveyrthing, i have everything i need but i just procrastiante and im afraid il run out of time before i get anything done.

any tips?
>>
So I'm drunk right now waiting for this girl to come and play black ops zombies with me(idk what we are) she's fucking amazing but idk I'm worried she won't show up. She doesn't text me after I invite her but she always has showed up. I'm just worried she won't show up this time. She's a child genius who is 20 but acts 30 and I'm just a 19 year old fuck up that used tinder way to much. She is actually the only girl I've gone with not off tinder in a year and a half. Idk there is so much to talk about and I don't know why I'm posting.
>>
>>686222931
To be honest, I've never found therapy to be overly useful, much in the same way that I don't find talking to friends or family useful. At the end of the day, it is in your hands. Happiness takes work - I've realised that now - and I would be remiss to rely on others for my own happiness.
>>
>>686224324
I met my girlfriend of two years on tinder believe it or not

Best GF ever had
my last one I met IRL was a slut
>>
>>686211758
https://youtu.be/mWn0EMBvTsI
>>686211758
Did you say it back?
>>
literally been stood up or ditched every single time I've made plans with my friends in the past month, with half-assed excuses as to why they ditched. Feeling like shit, not sure who really is my friend anymore.
>>
>>686224120
Dude, I understand what you mean. I think I've gotten to a crossroads, myself, whereby I either choose to give it a real go at fighting my depression or really succumb to hiding it under drinks and drugs like I have been for the past 10+ years. I know if I give up now, I probably won't have the strength to try again...
>>
>>686224739
Ha idk. I had a chance with a great girl off tinder. All I had to do was tell her to stay with me and not fly away with the guy who bought her tickets to newyork. But I had low self esteem and couldn't imagine a girl like her could love me. She got all fucked up and I'm doing much better. Ended up dating my drinking buddy, who cut off all connections with me. Instead of crying I relied on self improvement. I look better, feel better, and This woman that I'm waiting on is teaching me how to have a relationship with a woman, not just a girl.
>>
>>686224476
True, once I realized that happiness depends on self I've lived a better life
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>>686211906
There is not one event in this continually expanding universe that is singular. If you fell for this girl, it'd be plausible to say that her personality may be alive in someone else in the world. If I were you I would grieve her loss, as it seems that you genuinely cared for her, and find the girl that reminds you of something beautiful you had at one point and try making something to hold on too once more.
>>
>>686225561
On an unrelated note, I hate the way that a feels thread on /b/ is almost always bombarded with posters complaining about their love lives. I'm a 24 y o virgin here and have had depression now for more than a decade on/off (mostly on) but that was never one of the sources of my depression. Being unlucky in love is probably more of a rite of passage than anything else and should not be treated as a source of depression. Otherwise, we would all have been depressed in our adolescence.
>>
>>686225961
Yeah, it kinda sucks, though, because you also realise that it's time to put in some work..
>>
>>686225561
Im done fighting

ive tried CBT & copious therapy & three rehabs & every psych med known to man

its just futile
i really believe some people are lost causes and too fucked in the head. whether its genetic or how they/i was raised
>>
>>686226856
I was young when I realized it, I'm the poster that is drunk waiting on the girl. I still have a lot of work to do. But God I'm doing gooooddd
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>>686200502
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0YRICEt7XiY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V9Xu6mkacg8
>>
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Are you guys ready for some OC feels?
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>>686227744
Triple dubs

nice
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>>686227808
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>>686227856
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>>686227904
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>>686227945
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>>686212471
You know, I always see shit all over this site. But you have already seen it and after awhile, turned your life away from it. I'm envious of you anon, I'm still wallowing in the dirt like a fucking animal; you have the self control to be very conscious of your actions. If I were you, I would be very proud to know my mind is now oriented toward things that are nice, instead of things that are HOT. You're like that Bible story about the farmer's son who wasted his inheritance on hookers and shit, but ultimately decided his actions were not kosher and asked his dad for forgiveness and nothing else extra.
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>>686228029
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>>686228116
>>
Posted in another thread.
>Meet M. at end of January
>She sits infront in Pub Speaking
>She's cute enough,
>Start to like her
>Ask her out in Early April
>Say's yes, Friend R seems to force his way to tag along
>I ask her out to get coffee a week later
>"I'm Busy" with now counter offer.
>I stop for a month, other than occasionally speaking in class, and an odd text here or there.
>Most day's we don't acknowledge each other, sometimes talking around each other
>Mid-May rolls around. Invite her to hang out with friends in the City
>Busy (Her Bro's Graduation from College)
>We agree to hang out soon. No dates set, as we both have finals
>Text her randomly a week later asking about the graduation. We end up talking for 5 hours, with another short thing the following morning
>Invite her to a thing in the City that Saturday.
>This time she's doing stuff with friends. No date offered again.


Honestly I'm leaning toward not interested, though things slip through that are semi common when a girl is interested in a guy. (More letters added to words, increased Emoji use and stuff in person)


I suspect her friend R may have influenced her to a degree. Maybe he sees me a competition for her? She does speak differently to me when he's not near, seems more natuaral.

I suspect that R tried to get with her, but she friendzoned him.

I noticed that she speaks differently to me when he's not around as well.

On the last day I saw both of them, he randomly says bye to me, and only me. Only spoke to him 2-3 times prior.

Did not say bye to M, as I assumed she would be in our other class Friday, but had family stuff.


And now here I am, figuring out my next moves, as I along with others see this as being salvageable.
>>
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>>686228155
From last night.
I hope you anons enjoy the story.
It sure was a ride for me.
>>
>>686227035
Yeah, I feel you, bro. I never really found that CBT helped, either. Felt it was all just a bunch of psychological mumble-jumble and given that I was being treated for OCD - more Pure O - at the time as well as depression, it just gave me another thing to obsess over.

I am not having a go at your decision. I'm thinking about the same thing, myself. I wouldn't say it's anyone else's fault, though. If there does come a point where I just completely give up on life in the future, I will accept that it was just down to me, that the circumstances were too difficult and at the end of the day, I was a pussy.
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>>686208974
please put them down if you do that
don't be brutal to pupper
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>>686200502
Check this song and snort amphetamine
>>
sometimes me girlfriend tries to touch my butthole :'(
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>>686227485
Sorry, bro. Haven't had the time to trawl through every single post on this thread. Incidentally, I'm also the dude who just made that post complaining about girl problems on feels threads! Glad things are going well for you, though. Just wish I had the motivation to put some work in too.
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>>686202009
>vodka and pain meds
good job retard. Say hi to him for me.
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>>686213315
Why not save your money to see the beauty of the world? Have you ever seen the shifting greens of the northern lights floating through the sky like the ghost of the sky itself? Have you seen a sky filled with an ocean of stars from a camp you made on a mountain summit? Like, so many that it seems your floating over them instead of them floating over you? Have you watched gentle snow, falling so slow, like little dreams falling onto the world, into your mind? I think if there is nothing you want to achieve professionally, then you should experience the beauty of the world.
But, then again, I don't really know you that well anon.
>>
omfg this thread is still going?
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>>686215148
How about you remember how your pup made you feel warm inside when he came up to you so happy. I would remember how I reciprocated the affection and really loved pupper. I would be happy I got to be with and know pupper from the beautiful soul he was. And though pupper is gone with a piece of your soul, I would remember that he left a piece of his soul to live with you forever..in your precious memories..
>>
>>686228272
TL;DR?
>>
>be yesterday
>Playing with bfs iPad and watching Netflix
>Shift slightly in bed and thetouch screen reacts
>Netflix minimizes and his gallery shows up
>Browse cause I see our old photos and it makes me smile
>Find underwear pics his first gf sent him two months ago
>Confront him
>Admits and doesn't seem to care, says I wasn't doing it for him
>She's absolutely drop dead gorgeous and I can't compete
>Feels absolutely terrible
>Today I am lost.
>>
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>>686200502
I like this one
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>>686200767
dammm.....
something like this happened to me ...but with my grandpa , i was so depresed for a girl and i dont even have time to see my grandpa in the last week then he died , today...3 year ago
i still feel like shit
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>>686228946
ots hard to find that motivation tbh idk what's keeping me going. She is still not here, and now my mind is thinking about an ex from awhile ago. I know it sounds pretty egotistical and superficial, but really one of the largest things about comfort I get is seeing myself in the mirror. See how I change everyday. What problems are you going through with women?
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>>686232391
*internet hugs* Hey, here's what I would do: Try to get revenge. Cause a rift between those 2, something insidious, but not obvious and not something you seem capable of, you know? But that's just me. TBH I could never cheat on anyone I was in a relationship in. I'd regret it immediately. I guess I'm just so used to not being in a relationship that I'll do anything to keep one, even if I know I'm better off not in the relationship.
>>
>>686232391
Don't listen to the guys who's talking about revenge. Honestly just move on, there is a lot of Guys that would probably be happy to have you. If I had concentrated on revenge for every woman who fucked me over I would never have gotten better in life. Instead I just concentrated on improvement and found a new woman to be with me.
>>
>>686202812
Post more feels music
>song related
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cinJDxLUsNY
>>
>>686232955
You should feel like shit.

What a fucking piece of shit
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>>686233138
Damn, you're pathetic
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>>686233594
>new woman

FAT
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>>686232391
Yeah... You're not good enough
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>>686213574
I think you should break it off. She's not right for you if you're only with her to keep from being alone. I think you should look into that mental issues chick. If you both have similar interests and you could see yourself holding her close and vice versa. If she has problems like you, maybe you guys can lean on each other like two sides of an arch. She can be your coast and you could be her sea.
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>>686228485
Cock ball torture does help
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>>686234236
Yeah.. You can both an hero
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>>686233213
It's not worth it. I wasn't good enough for him and there's no sense in fucking them over or trying to. I just have to accept it butnits hard

>>686233594
This. And thank you. I feel the same

>>686234031
I know....
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>>686233904
I'm 6"3 165 pounds. I'm not that fat, and if your talking about the women I'm with Ibe never gone for a fat girl. Except that time I got cat fished
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>>686233138
I don't really have any problems with women. Like I said, given the underage demographic of /b/, I can't really see how girls can cause you guys so many problems. I'm in a long-distance relationship right now but it's more my depression causing problems in our relationship. Unless you were really set on a girl and she left you, I can't see how she can cause you depression. In any case, I try to live my life with as few emotional connections as possible. It is my belief that if you try to derive emotional fulfillment from others, you will ultimately be left disappointed. The only problem is that I am rather emotionally unstable.
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>>686200502

Most of us never had that. Who wants some chick who is still figuring out her period and too worried about jockeying for favors with the Mean Girls at school to pay real attention to you?
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>>686233806
Haha ya I probably am. But I'm lucky enough that life always seems to keep me on the up and up.
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>>686234815
Good luck with everything. Just remember there is someone that you can make happy
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>>686210377
>>686210523
>>686210563
dude, almost every thing on 4chan is cancer.
im okay with this.
>>
>>686214178
You look pretty attractive anon
Youll find someone right for you
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>>686235085
Love your attitude, bro. Don't get hung up on a couple of girls.
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>>686234980
Oh women don't leave me depressed. The ex I'm thinking about we lived together and I let her bail on the lease and it drained my college fund. Anyway my phone is going to die and I need the alarm
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>>686211906
>for you young lurkerfags, we know you're there
Oh shit you just called me out
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>>686235245
Thank you. And I'm trying to move on or whatever. I'm just really at a loss and upset.... he preached about never cheating and being a responsible adult and he couldn't practice what he preached.... that's the hardest part.
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>>686200502
I feel like a fucking shithead. I love this girl so much, but she doesn't love me. I try to be there for her, support her, I've been with her before but every time she gets cold feet about a month or two in and dumps me. I'm sick of it but I love her so goddamn much, and I hate myself for looking at other girls and thinking about being with them but I know I need to move on. I love her a lot, but right now I'm so pisses off about this whole damn thing.
>>
>>686215881
what a cunt
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>>686235436
Dude, why?
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>>686232391
What a douche. I hope he's an ex now
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>>686222009
im right there with ya man, im in my third year of high school and I have no fucking clue what to do.
>>
>>686232391
tits or gtfo
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>>686222009

Been exactly where you are. The fear and pain dulls with the years.
>>
>>686236195
As far as I'm concerned he is now.... he says we both have a lot of problems and sorung suicidal thoughts on me.... saying until he fixes that he can't be with anyone.... I'm not sure I believe him but I am genuinely heartbroken that I just wasn't enough. I tried so hard and it wasn't enough
>>
>>686236613
Fuck off
>>
>>686201014
this is why you don't use ketchup wile you wright
>>
>>686201014
fake and gay
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>>686234236
While that sounds rather romantic, and honestly I think we'd have a shot together, bros before hoes has to apply here. It's a long story, but I'll tell it here. Greentext because why not. Timeframe might be way off, but whatever.
>be me
>be a TA for Japanese class 2nd semester junior year (inb4 mods)
>current gf sits in back of room, hang out with her when I have no work to do
>starts talking with one of her friends, mental issues chick, let's call her A.
>A and I hit it off pretty well, become fast friends.
>after about 2 months, I invite her to hang out with my group of friends at lunch.
>almost immediately, my best bro, let's call him M, starts to talk with her
>a few days later, they start going out
>okwhatever.JPEG
>ff 2-3 weeks later
>we're talking over Google Hangouts because school
>she says she has feelings for me, has had them for a while.
>I'm one of her vent buddies, so we have a nondisclosure agreement in place
>wellfuck.exe
>talk about it, say that while I like her, I like her as a really close friend, that were both in relationships, etc.
>we pretty much agree not to talk about it.
>a few days later, the drama kicks in.
>A has a breakdown, tells M about everything
>M is cool bro, doesn't hate my guts
>tries to keep the relationship going, shit seems to be fine
>ff 2-3 days later
>A has yet another breakdown, says she's realizing she never had feelings for M, was trying to keep him happy, and is unhappy with the relationship.
>I say to do what you have to do, say what you have to say, I have no clue what to do.
>They break up that day
>M is still cool bro about it
>A few days later, asks why she broke up with him
>she tells him that she never had feelings for him
>M is no longer cool bro, but is still cool with me
>M is friends with most of my friends, now hates A's guts
>tells me if I even think of going out with A, we're not friends anymore

And now we're here. That's why I'm not just going for it. What do, guys?
>>
>>686214364
You are me. And I am you. Do you feel like your just trying to win a game of connect four thousand and everything you do revolves around getting a row of dots to align in your favor. No apparent reason, just to see if you could? Like you just tell people what will bring about the desired response?
>>
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>>686200811
Damn, the truth
>>
Teenage love is overrated...
18 y/o right now, 19 soon and fuck relationships man I'm worried about doing my thing not some girl to slow down how much time I have it takes me to reach my goals. Focus on you and NEVER chase someone EVER, that's what I learned anyway. Be the best you can be and be shameless, positive, and never knock down a good opportunity. (I'm just rambling on now)
-BD
>>
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My girlfriend just broke up with me. I actually got on /b/ for the first time in awhile looking for a feels thread. It wasn't a long relationship at all, little over a month, but I never cared about someone the way I cared about her. Everything I felt for her she said she felt for me. But she just fucking dropped me man, like I never meant anything. Two days ago we were cuddling on my couch laughing and having fun. I just wish I knew what happened yesterday that led to her leaving me. She accepted every fucking side of me and I did everything I could for her. I don't know how I'll find someone that will look at me, knowing everything she knows about me and still want to hold my hand and be with me. I don't know how she could say she cares about me then just fucking leave. I don't think I want to find someone else. I don't want someone to have that much power over me again.
>>
>>686208513
>pic related

IUH LUVVE UUUUU! IUHVE LUVVED UUUU AWL AWLONG!
>>
>>686222009
dude, i was you about 6 years ago. nothing in life interests you? find something. there is such a wide variety of activities life has to offer you that there has to be something that you might enjoy. there's a hole in your chest? fill it with (hopefully) these interests. otherwise, things are going to get a lot worse. i'm 6 years down the line from you and that hole is now filled with drink and drugs (filled, i know) and my life is a vacuous mess.

i realised something quite a while ago: short of killing myself, i might as well enjoy life, not knowing how much longer it had to offer if anything at all. unfortunately, i have lost sight of that recently but my philosophy is this: if you're gonna do something, you might as well enjoy yourself. if you're gonna go to school anyway, you might as well find something you enjoy. if you're gonna get a job, you might as well find a profession you like. if you're gonna stay at home all day and become a shut-in NEET, you might as well find something enjoyable on which to spend your free time. this philosophy has always served me well (at least, when i have relied on it) and i hope it serves you well as well whatever you choose to do. hopefully, i won't see you back here with the same old problems another 6 years down the line.
>>
>>686236952
don't pull that fake sjw bullshit. i ain't believin you. you know the rules.
>>
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Find passion /b/ros
We only have one life, don't waste it whining about things and wishing it was better. You're the only one in your life that can make a change. Don't be a lazy dickhead DAMN IT!
>>
>>686238860
Doesn't apply to a feels thread, dumbass. You want tits go to /gif/, pornhub or elsewhere. That simple.
>>
>>686238319
>that hole is now filled with drink and drugs (filled, i know) and my life is a vacuous mess.
Oh hey me
>>
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>>686207625
>a few months ago

It'll come back. You stop caring after a few years at month long intervals until it hits you again.

It always comes back, anon. Keep holding your breath, because you'll die before you stop feeling lonely.
>>
>>686237501
I don't know what to tell you bro. If you liked her, you should have told her that instead of staying close friends. M's not happy, A's not happy, but most of all you're not happy. I would wait for M to get another girl/set him up with another girl, then tell M out of respect as a friend, that you really like this girl and if he would still stop being your friend if you and A git together, even though he has a new girl. It seems that if M chooses to stop being a friend, I'd say you lost a bad friend because he would want her to be unhappy more than he wants you to be happy. Then again, maybe M won't care either way.
>>
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>>686239324
where does it say that?
>>
>>686240270
Where does it say to provide tits or gtfo?
>>
>>686239458
i hate you...
>>
>>686216015
Keklle
>>
>>686240380
it's well-established 4chan etiquette, much like opening the door for a lady
>>
>>686240044
Well, another problem is my current gf, although honestly the whole "asexual" thing is slowly but surely making things worse in the relationship. Not to mention more complications involving a long distance relationship gone horribly wrong I still can't get over. I don't fucking know, I feel like I'm so close to an answer, but I just can't quite catch it.
>>
>>686240679
...after having confirmed her sex with tits
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>>686202009
You have to be fucking a girl to do a donkeypunch
>>
This guy deserves to be here...
>>
When I joined 4chan 6 months ago, I expected to see horrible people. After seeing everything that 4chan was notorious for, I had second thought's coming to this site. But after being here for a long time, I realize the truth. Everyone on this site has a life, and everyone on here was innocent at one point in their life. People stayed here, because it helped them deal with their problems and everyone here supported each other.

Have you ever noticed when someone wants to commit suicide on 4chan, everyone tells them not to? That's because we have all been their and we have all had that feeling. We know how they feel, and we know that they have more to life than they think.

God bless 4chan.
>>
>>686240679
This is probably one of the dumbest things I've read tonight.
>>
>>686218813
>tfw you died a little inside
>>
>>686240909
I feel that most fags on here just out on a front but ate actually decent human beings. That's my experience from browsing /b/ for about 9 years
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>>686241228
*are, damnit lol
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>>686202930

This just shows that there is a beautiful side to /b
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>>686210239
Deep
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Just about out of reasons to be alive. C'mon Albert Camus, give me something that provides a satifactory answer to the questions I have about meaninglessness and suffering.
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>>686240937
bit rich coming from a (supposed) woman
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>>686222049
Is there anything you like? Raindrops? Waning moons? Trees?
>>
Feels bad because this girl I'm absolutely in love with, doesn't give a shit about me. It's fucking awful, I thought she liked me, she lied to me, she told me she cared but she only kept me around because everybody else left and I was the best result of a shitty situation. She's so needy but at the same time she'll ignore me for days on end and when I finally stop giving a shit, she drags me back and I'm fucking sick of it.
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>>686200502

Well, that's a way for me to contemplate my existence.
>>
I'm so tired of so many things.

I'm tired of growing distant from my friends when I begin to get close to them and have to find new ones.

I'm tired of getting new people to like me by faking the way I am when I'm happy until I believe it myself.

I'm just so tired. I don't want to die and I don't want to do anything. I just want someone to help me but I push people away. I feel like a living oxymoron, a human conundrum.
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>>686241477
>>686241538
Goddammit anon ; (
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>>686242252
Cut the chain, man. You may feel strongly for this chuck but she's the using type. She uses you to make her feel better but will not return anything. It's a one sided relationship. She needs you more than you need her.
>>
>>686242252
Whelp you can either let yourself be infatuated and eventually get let down or you can find joy in it what you obsess over. Your call.
>>
>>686242058
Never claimed a gender to begin with but that besides the point. I owe you nothing. I am here to confess my feels like many other anons. Again you wants tits, etc.find another thread and quit being autistic.
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>>686210037
Gtfo
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>>686242765
Tragic
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>>686242945
>>
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>>686203686

Does /b/ look like a fucking animal clinic?

No. Hit yourself in the head.
>>
>>686216042
But we know the feeling of having a companion, and it's fucking amazing. We dont want to be lonely
>>
>>686242669
dude, chill. just trying to rustle your jimmies. glad you didn't (overly) react, though. anyway, it's 6am now over here and i've just partly spent the past 8 hours arguing with you. hope you have a good one. we all go through tough times but then we die - it's not all bad. let's do this again, sometime.
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>>686242058
c'mon man quit being autistic
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>>686242639
Yeah. I just need to end it. She's abusive and manipulative, my friend who use to hang around her use to get verbally abused by her and then she'd make up some goddamn sob story and he'd fall back in the trap, it went on with him for three months and I'm a dipshit going on a year and a half, but she didn't use to be like this. I think its finally gotta be fucking over.
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>>686205218

Thanks for serving, man. I just enlisted in the Army. This is my shot to really turn my life around and "be all I can be," for lack of a better phrase.
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>>686243892
I wish you luck, /b/rother. I hope you're able to do the thing I'll never be able to do.
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>>686203686
Probably something internal
Crushed bones poking in to vital organs
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>>686205798

this got me so hard, and i have no one to blame but myself

i dont blame her anymore, i wouldnt want to watch me drink myself to death either
>>
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>cousin moves in with us
>over hear my parents gossiping about her and how she was being molested by my uncle and her aunt was a druggie hoe
>you'd never guess it since she's so adorable
>my mom's a nurse, pretty much supports us but is gone all the time
>my dad does renovation so he's gone for the better part of the day
>pretty much took the brunt of watching and spending time with her since my constantly pitied and Coddled her, while my dad tried to completely avoid her
>over the next few weeks I treated her like my own little brother I never had
>playing pranks, teasing her, making her the Luigi to my Mario in any CO op games I had
>I honestly had a Blast
>but then shit got real and one night after I was playing around with her she tried to fucking kiss me
>not a little kid kiss she went straight for my lips a tried to embrace me
>good thing she was clumsy and ended up headbutting me instead
>I reprimanded her and explained the love she felt was only the love you feel for relative not a man
>she immediately asked me if it was because she wasnt as pretty as other girls
>I explained calmly that she was very adorable I'm just not into girls under 18
>mfw she did an entire personality change and called me a liar as crocidile tears rolled down her face she shouted saying I'm just like her uncle
>mfw she told me she felt every boner I got when she sat on my lap
>mfw she said she found my loli folder I had labeled under games
>mfw my own cousin thought I was a pedo and wanted her
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>>686244168
Sometimes you just gotta draw the fucking line in the sand dude. You gotta look deep inside yourself and say "What am I willing to put up with today?" NOT FUCKING THIS. [Lol aside from the quote, I hope you find your way out too.]
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Dumping feels pics here
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>>686244742
So do I, man. At this moment in time, though, the darkness is pretty deep. I legitimately want to hurt myself. Cut, stab, bruise, I don't care, I just want pain. Something physical to match my emotional and mental suffering. And I honestly am horrible at breakups. Too much pain that could be avoided.
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More?
>>686245664
>>
>>686245664
reminds me of my time in france (lang student). i was all alone working in a high school, drowning my sorrows almost every night because of this feeling of stasis that i had found myself in. pretty sure i got alcohol poisoning at some point - woke up one morning to a face slightly less recognisable to the night before: slightly rounder, slightly more puffed up. i got to school worrying that somebody would notice. noone did. i wish someone had.
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>>686245903
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Let me know if anyone relates /b/ros
):
>>
>>686245903
i like ones like this: short and sweet. thread caps and the like often require too much effort for too little reward.
>>
>>686242452

youre not alone man, wish i could give advice, but i dont have any
>>
>>686247072
Got many on my pinterest
>inb4 omg get out of here fag using pinterest
>>
I rolled around in bed.
Slept pretty well that night.
I open my eyes and the first thing I see are these green eyes that are happy to see me.
I focus in and see her face.
She smiles at me and says, "Good morning, sleepy head."
She laughs at me and I break out in smile.
Haven't felt a smile that real in my whole life and I felt a warm feeling in my chest.
I am truly happy for the first time in my life.
She quickly rolls over and I see her back.
Her hair was a nice blonde colour and very straight.
I quickly grabbed her by the waist and held her close to me.
She continued laughing and asked me, "Why are you doing that?"
And....I didn't say anything.
I was really lost in the moment seeing her squirm around, hearing her laugh, and seeing her face again.
Finally, I was able to say something, "I don't know".
She stared back at me, still smiling.
She got up on the bed and started running around it.
Didn't know we had such a large bed, but found out then and there.
I asked her what she is doing and she said, "Come on!"
I got up and started playing with her on the bed.
We started jumping on the bed and me grabbing her while she's laughing away.
I can still see her face, her dancing green eyes, her beautiful blonde hair, her laugh, and her smile.
Next thing I know, I'm looking at the ceiling in my studio.
I can hear my fan just moving along.
I spiked in sadness realizing it was all a dream.
That girl's face burnt into my memory.
I have never seen her before in my life. I didn't know any blonde with green eyes.
I have never felt so alone in my life.
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>>686246634
You do get to decide that they're a whiny little faggot who should get the fuck over it though.

Just because someone says you hurt them, it doesn't mean you should care.
>>
>>686246858
This is shit. Like really shit. It's the whinging of a friendzoned faggot. You didn't have her because you're a little pussy dick sucker and that other guy is a real man.
>>
>>686247340
>>686247394
>>686247479
Holy duck, dude. I'm legit crying now
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>>686248252
faggot
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>>686247320
Recently, I realized that there is a girl I saw that looks like that girl from my dream from 4 years ago. I was so blinded for the past year with school work that I didn't realize that girl physically existed and was right in front of me.

Yet, I can't really talk to her. She's 17 soon to be 18 and still in HS. I'm a recent college graduate and unemployed. I think I've already freaked her out last week when the realization hit me since I was staring at her a lot.

Bad timing.
>>
>>686247233
never really got pinterest. girl i dug used to use it. would be the ideal woman for 4channers as well: slightly androgynous redhead but with an ample bust (which she used to like to hide under baggy clothing); tall; undercut; short hair; piercings; big, oval, emerald eyes - sorry, i got sidetracked there (it's always the ones that got away that stick on your mind) but yeah, she's the only reason i know about pinterest.
>>
>>686236613
>this
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>>686249624
lol a bit too late, bro
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