Three items that will freak-out your cashier.
>peanut butter
>doggy treats
>carpet cleaner
>>685869004
Lighter fluid, methanol, morning glory seeds.
>>685869004
teddy bear
duct tape
axe
Bleach
Razors
Rope
>shrek dvd
>grease
>condoms
flowers, lube, machete
>elmer's glue
>jar of olives
>scissors
...and you have to act like you're in a rush and ask her to hurry it up.
>>685869004
condoms duct tape bleach
toothpaste
oreos
halloween gift bags
>yogurt with active cultures
>2L coke
>dog collar
Laxatives coffee and a cucumber
>>685869004
Shrek VHS
Candles
Bright green robe
>>685869004
Bread
Butter
Cheese
>>685869004
my little pony doll
fedora
2 liter mtn dew
>>685869651
i don't get it anon
One single shucked piece of corn a can of lard and a live lobster ruber bands off of course
Wifebeater
Black paint
A watermelon
Jar of Vaseline and Monster High doll and Sleepytime tea
>>685869004
Kitchen knife
Towels
Lawn chair (foldable)
>>685869004
Rat poison, cake mix, birthday card
>Toilet paper
>Bleach
>Diarrhoea relief medicine
Act like you are in distress and discomfort to get to the front of the queue by kind shoppers.
When they let you in, call your friend/partner over with the overflowing trolley (cart) of items.
Box cutter, gauze, bleach
Can we do a round where the condoms are off?
You can list anything and add condoms to make it weird
>>685869004
one disposable nappy
large vasoline
one lolipop
Candy
Kids baithing suit
duck tape
rope
knife
shovel
>Teddy bear, String, and knife
>>685869004
Donuts
Donut holes
glue
bleach
rope
meat cleaver
Box of Tissues
lotion
insert any item here
>bedbug foggers
>chicken livers
>88-cent pregnancy test
PROTIP: I'm a cashier.
3 boxes of condoms of varying sizes
>>685869004
>three grape
>three banana
>giggle
>"what?"
>black man pick watermelon
>>685871204
you monster
>>685869004
Bleach
Ammonia
rope
>>685869004
Pregnancy Test
NyQuil
Wire Coat Hangers
>>685869750
Yogurt for decaying the body
Coke for destroying the teeth
Dog Collar to make it look like a pet burial
Rape whistle.
Edible underwear
Enema kit
(Wink on the way out)
Cashiers don't pay attention to items
A whole box of slim jims
Sour salt
Drano
>>685871204
kekekek
>>685869004
rubbers
cucumber
Frozen movie
>>685869004
>qur'an
>beard
>9 year old
>>685870789
Your mom
Condoms
Pretty regular for me man
Magnum Condoms Lube Tampons
>>685869891
The only thing freaky about that is they still sell VHS
>>685869004
>doughnuts
>doughnut holes
>glue
oldbutgold
>>685870139
Olive brine has a chemical reaction that is explosive when combined with Elmer glue (actually with the polymer used in Elmer) thus shove the scissors in the can, combine glue seal and boom instant metal bomb with glass.
>>685869896
absolutely fucking wild
Cable ties
Plastic sheeting
Saw
>>685869004
Nothing will freak out your cashier, not even blatantly shoving things in your pockets/purse to steal them in front of us. We have seen it all in every combination. And could care less if you set the place on fire.
a lime a coke and a bag of nuts.
while singing 'put the lime in the coke and nuts and mix it all together"
>>685869004
Milk
Eggs
Bread
>laxatives
>funnel
>gasmask
>bleach
>trash bags
>shovel
>>685869004
I was a Walmart cashier for a while. and trust me no one buys three things from there. if they are the rest of the shit they want is stuffed in a baby stoller or backpack that they have
>>685872071
thats it, thread over, everyone go home, thanks for ruining our fun ex-walmart bro
>>685869004
candy
rope
lube
>>685871995
The fuck is wrong with you!?
>>685871918
COULDN'T care less.
If you could care less, that means you care at least some.
This is why you're still a cashier.
>>685871204
i like that idea.
Pumpkin
Vaseline
Adult diapers
>Sprite
>cough syrup
>jolly ranchers
>>685869004
>laxatives
>bucket
>pack of straws
Cucumber lube and tylenol
Ketchup
Liquor
Buns
Catch up lick her buns
>>685872610
nigger
>>685872651
>>685869561
Top kek
>>685872396
We do care at least some, we still need to get paid. COULD care less.
This is why you keep trying to buy diapers with food stamps.
>Painkillers
>Coathangers
>Pregnancy test
>>685869004
>large quantities of lubricant
>cucumber
>womans heels
>>685872651
Saw this once. It was a cokey girl getting ready to step on an 8-ball.
>>685869004
>largest jug of bleach they sell
>largest jug of bleach they sell
>largest jug of bleach they sell
>>685869004
>minced meat
>pasta
>pasta sauce
>>685872338
just being honest. worked seven months was they wanted me to run the front end before I left but decided that shit was god awful. I remember distinctly the thing that made me quit was when two welfare princess came through my line with a bunch of shit and I was just being polite and asked how there day was going and she gave me lip saying she would be better if I just rang up her shit and she could get the fuck out of here I looked at her and said now you wait logged off my register and walked away. she screamed at me you just gonna leave me here with a child I said im not that babies father
Lube
Cucumber
Lazy town box set
>>685873101
look over pamphlet about abortions while wating in the checkout line.
>>685873101
>while wearing a Planned Parenthood uniform.
>>685869004
>one Large Kitchen Knife
>Saran Wrap
>Garbage Bags
>>685869004
Duct tape
Hacksaw
Rubber duckie
>Black bed sheet
>White paint
>Video camera
>>685869004
faggot get on my level
>barney dvd
>plunger
>lube
>>685871204
This guy's ready to make America great again
>>685871204
Sorry to break this news to you... But as someone who has worked as a cashier for the last 6 years for a large retail chain, none of these combinations of items would freak me out. Ive seen it all already. Its just part of the job.
>>685869004
anthrax and dynamite
>One half watermelon
>One half watermelon
>Super glue
Toothpaste
My own wallet
A soap dispenser from one of their bathrooms
>>685871370
Literally reported everytime this thread is made
>>685873613
dat
pic
yo
>>685873766
>>685873658
not even that ^
>>685869004
did they look at those and realize you were retarded?
>a plant I take into the store form the parking lot
>one of the ladders employees use to get stuff from the high shelves
>one of the flippy double doors that lead to the back room
>>685869004
>condoms
>lube
>dog treats
tub of chicken fat
blindfold
syringe
>>685873869
I like you
>Working at Kmart
>guy comes in almost closing
>real creepy looking old dude
>get told he comes to Kmart because he got caught masterbating at our Walmart
>yea right.jpeg
>guy buys rope, duct tape, and little girls panties.
>two niggers and a nun
>>685873766
>Fertiliser
>Kerosene
>Nails
Are you even looking?
>rat poison
>can of soup
>pepto bismol
>>685874060
Not even that. All of these combinations can easily be coincidental.
>>685871459
Consent " "
mayo mayo mayo
>>685874541
You're doing yard work, repairing something, and you have a lamp you need to refill. Are you using any coupons or do you have any bottle slips to redeem today, sir?
>>685873766
Wich combination is the freakiest that you remember?
>>685871441
who buys a collar for a dead animal you fucking retard
and who is autistic enough to come back and try to explain their stupid idea
Box of 9mm rounds
Video camera
Björk's greatest hits.
ftfy
>condoms
>rotisserie chicken
>diapers
>>685873766
>none
agree. thread is full of retards that have mythologized what it is to be someone else.
I'm a cashier. I tell people that my day is going badly because the snakes I'm trying to train to chew bubble gum keep popping the bubbles with their fangs. And when I help little old ladies out of the store, I ask which motorcycle their 10+ bags of groceries are going on.
I make 13 dollars an hour to do something you are too damn lazy or feeble or fat to do yourself at the row of self-checkouts you just complained for 10 minutes about and I scan over $1000 of merchandise an hour.
Do I think you are dumb enough to use any of these things with the I obvious intent? Sure. Do I think you will succeed in doing so? Doubtful. Do I care? Hell 2 da naw naw.
>>685875054
kek
>white bed sheet
>crucifix
>lighter
>>685875314
kek
>>685871294
why?i dont get it
>>685873198
PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
Lemons
Limes
A bottle of Slice.
>>685875109
oh no
>>685870489
Top kek
>>685871065
>String
What, you gonna roleplay with your dolls?
>>685871204
>>685874991
2 weeks after i started my job i had a girl come through my lane 5 minutes after midnight because she just turned 21. She bought 3 very large plastic bottles (like 1.5 liter size) of tequila, a rubbet mallet, a box of Magnum condoms, and some rope. Was very polite. I wished her a happy birthday.
Condoms Disney movie and little girl clothes
>>685875208
You must be so special.
A cucumber half
A cucumber half
Stapler
>>685875438
Because bedbugs are gross and will make you check every itch for hours. And chicken livers are only for bait or niggers and you aren't buying any other fishing equipment. And if you are buying a pregnancy test that comes up to 96 cents with tax, you're pregnant.
>>685875109
Condoms are because your girlfriend has issues with birth control and you dont want another kid. Chicken js for dinner. Diapers are for your baby.
Next.
>>685875018
Lurk more
Eggplant
KY jelly
Ibuprofin
Ammonia
Bleach
rope
>>685873054
sounds hot anon
Lube
Doll
Kids tylenol
>cucumber
>lube
>razor blades
>>685869004
condoms
stuffed animal
candy
Magnum Condoms
Cucumbers
Baby carrots
>>685875208
nigga you work at publix?
A book on serial killers
rope
duct tape
>>685871204
How can you buy a hole? Isn't it just air?
Dorito's
Mtn Dew
Call of Duty infinite
>>685869004
Fruit loops
More fruits loops
A vulue sized box of fruit loops
A state map with all the schools highlighted
Glock
Abba's greatest hits album
>biggest plastic doll they had
>drill
>flavored lube
>cucumber
>vaseline
>binoculars
>bag of goldfish
>wd40
>waffle maker
Lube
Rubber bands
Watermelons
>Lube
>Tissues
>Tickle Me Elmo
>>685876529
I probably couldn't stop myself from smacking the pleb buying all those at once and only those things
Toothbrush
Toothpaste
Orange Juice
>funnel
>balloon
>laxatives
>>685876611
Handguns are b& from Walmart
>>685876945
The poor bastard.
>>685876027
Lurking won't fix retardation, it might make it worse.
6 pack of cups
6 pack of hot dog buns
4 pack of hot dog weiners
>>685876574
A gay republicans autobiography
lube
cucumbers
>>685875208
1000? That's pretty high. I don't think I ever got over 780. I think 550 is the average at my store. But it's full of Felicias.
>>685875849
If you knew the first thing about our profession, you would know he is a fucking rockstar that has been working a grind for 5 years, at least. This nigger truly loves groceries.
>>685875993
Man and and I never even thought of eating the chicken
Airsoft gun, condoms, black spray paint
>>685877106
Deer god... Is there no cure?
Wait!
>NyQuil
>Campbell's soup
>Sprite
>>685875892
Matzo
Bratwurst
chocolate coins
Pencil, rope, paper
Predator DVD, work boots, Vaseline
>>685877124
How come you get 6 weiners??
>>685877562
That's deer Jesus not deer god.
... Asshole...
bleach
water pistol
Source magazine
>>685869004
>clear plastic raincoat
>clear plastic boot covers
>Lumber Axe with 1.8m handle
>>685877573
Nope. Though if it wasn't beef bratwurst, I would politely point that out by saying what the items were while scanning them, just in case.
>egg and onion matzo
>PORK bratwurst
>jew gold
>>685869004
bag of candy bars
sewing needles
blank video tape
Toilet paper
Ski mask
Sticker that says "If you're gunna ride my ass at least pull my hair"
Chicken
hot sauce
broken clock
>>685876267
>>685876298
>>685876045
>>685875892
>>685875823
>>685875740
>>685875109
>>685874136
>>685873658
>>685873256
>>685873054
>>685872661
>>685872552
>>685872372
>>685871755
>>685871670
>>685871602
>>685871325
>>685870893
>>685870371
>>685869859
>685869647
CONDOMS/LUBE/CUCUMBERS LOLOLOLOLOL1!!!ONE1!
>Adult diapers
>Bulk qty of applesauce
>Turkey Baster
>>685871204
fucking kek
>>685877573
One ply toilet
One ply toilet
Glue
>>685869004
>water
>ramen
>dozen of eggs
DUN DUN DUUUUUUN!!!!
clear raincoat
copy of "fore!" by huey lewis & the news
axe
>>685877958
>>685878174
Everything in the Kosher isle
Barbecue lighter fluid
Matches
>>685877719
have you not heard of that holy trinity anon? deer god, raptor Jesus, and the holy Jew, didn't they teach you this in catholic school?
Sprite
generic cough medicine
White cups
Already did my best on accident.
>>685869182
Ayeee
Pregnancy test
Wires coat hanger
Garbage bags
Candy
Santa clause mask
Rope
Raw fish
Raw chicken
Pack of cigarettes
>>685877573
>m'shikse
Benadryl
Condoms
Lube
Rope
Chair
Painkillers
Shit just got real eh ?
>>685878471
I'm a tatted skinhead, and even I eat fucking jewish food. Grow up.
Wood
Rope
Afropicks
>pepsi bottle
>coca cola glass
>coca cola bottle
>>685878925
Sounds like it's fit something really kinky of pretty sad.
>>685878925
oh fuck yeah big man. really real
Shrimp
White wine
Papers
Panty hose
Blonde wig
Duck tape
>>685869004
>mlp dvd's
>self help book
>robitussin
>>685877106
Luke more
>>685869004
condoms
wisk
chunky beef soup
>>685869961
>Fedora for decaying the body
>Mountain Dew for destroying the teeth
>My Little Pony Doll to make it look like a pet burial
>>685879379
The more you spend on 4chan the more fucked up you get. Thats a known fact.
>>685878471
Ever notice how hebrew national only comes with 7 hot dogs instead of 8? They really are made by jews.
>>685875927
i respect this
Cooking oil
chicken
Fried chicken
>>685871370
>>685871599
>>685872541
>>685873691
>>685875686
newfags thinking this isn't in everyone of these threads.
>>685879038
>>685869004
>Butter
>Butter
>Butter
>Butter
>I Can't Believe it's not Butter
>Butter
>Butter
>Butter
>>685871403
Pregnancy Test for decaying the body
Wire Coat Hangers for destroying the teeth
Nyquil to make it look like a pet burial
>>685869004
>Cucumber
>Lotion
>Bullets
>Baking Soda
>Cigarette lighter
>Spoons
Red beans
bake beans
beano
>>685871840
Bullshit
Dog whistle
pack of hot dogs
shotgun
>cough syrup
>Syringes
>Candy
Clothes pins
nair
preparation H
>be a man
>women's heels
>bright red lipstick
>large grapefruit
assuming this is a wal mart
funnel
DIY enima
a cute new male beta fish
>>685869004
lube, rope, bleach
Pregnancy test
boxing clothes
garbage bags
>>685879332
Dvds are for your 5 year old daughter. Robitussin is for your sick wife. Self help book is because you cant handle your marraige and child.
Next.
Child's bicycle helmet
Stunt ramp
Bottle of Whiskey
>>685871840
i also calll bullshit you're an asshole
sanitary wipes
toilet paper
cheap package of underwear
>>685869004
Hot dogs
Big ass fish hooks
Axle grease
Oil
Bananas
Tampons
>>685879564
fuck off please just stop posting
>>685869004
Bananas
Condoms
Bug spray
scissors
glue
a PC
a copy of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, some lube, and a cucumber
machete
halloween mask
instructional guide to spooky murdering
Milk
Eggs
Bread
>>685880953
The average large chain store (kmart, walmart, meijer, target) doesnt sell "stunt ramps"
Next.
>>685869004
>straws
>drain cleaner
>shrek DVD
>>685869004
>fresh eels
>lube
>Disney paper party hats
>>685881475
>instructional guide to spooky murdering
found in most grocery stores, walmart supercenters, and shell gas stations
sewing kit
instructional guide to mending a prolapsed anus
small cucumber
>newspaper
>lighter
>rope
Condoms, invisible tacks, super glue
>>685869004
Fried chicken, watermelon, and grape drink. Just kidding, I stole them.
>>685869004
This might be kind of cheating.
>Grab two kinds of paper towel
>Grab a wire hanger
>Ask cashier, "Which one of these brands do you think will absorb blood better?"
>Before they answer interrupt them
>"Ya know, it doesn't matter, I'll just take both of them."
>Do it for teh lulz
>>685881721
made me kek
wp
>>685869004
Ben Gay
Preparation H
Finger Cots (look like rubbers for your fingers)
>Spongebob costume
>Running shoes
>Machete
>>685881578
not true. they sell small plastic ramps. at least they did when I was younger
>A catcher in the rye
>Beatles white album
>kneepads
>>685869004
I can't believe it's not butter
I can't believe it's not butter
Butter.
>>685881332
Your child likes Disney cartoons. You decided to get it when your wife sent you to the store for the cucumber that she wants in her salad for dinner. You're hoping to get laid tonight after you put your child to bed so you pick up lube.
Next.
>>685869004
>butter
>peanut butter
>i can't believe it's not butter
>>685881024
Youre a woman on her period. Its a very heavy flow.
Next.
>>685881899
>>685881997
The magical dubs beckon for you
>>685871536
iv had some before recite and comment on the shit i bought, almost lost my shit.
>>685882030
kek'd
Ropes
Bleach
Chewing gum
Chopsticks
A wok
Bag of catfood
>>685878197
This was quite chuckle worthy actually.
>>685872838
Another casher here can confirm people try to buy diaps with stamps. And fucking cigarettes for some reason. NO JAMAL FOR THE LAST TIME NEWPORTS ARE NOT A FOOD
>>685869004
>saw
>duct tape
>this book
>camera
>selfie stick
>women's shoes
>>685879545
Fucking underrated
>>685882209
this is cutest pepe. i feel like it's pepe's young son who was neglected as a baby and now that he's a toddler he has a short temper and emotional issues. he just wants his dad to be around more, instead of being alone all the time while all the other kids make fun of him. as a kid it he just ends-up being angry all the time because he doesn't understand more complex emotions and he has lacks a strong role model.
>>685882645
>bonus: ask them to gift wrap the book
>bucket
>rope
>lotion
>>685882645
Noice
>>685882775
>>685869004
Baseball bat
Barbwire
Leather jacket
>>685882275
You like asian food and you have a pet. I too like asian food and have pet cats that also need to be fed.
Next.
>>685869004
>rope
>lemons
>hand lotion
>>685882775
sorry son, i just have so many dank memes to post.
>>685882148
goat harness
lubricate
condom
(sorry for my English)
Beer
Non-alcohol beer
kids book
>>685870139
H'es gonna sniff elmers glue whilst sissoring his sister, who's name is olive
Obvious as fuck you pleb.
>>685883279
>goat harness
nigga what country you from they sell that in big stores
>milk
>leash
>dildo
show up in cat furry suit
Diapers
Laxative
Lube
>>685871840
This makes mustard gas
>>685883279
>>685883447
Burka
Korean
Knife
>>>685883477
Lazy nigger you can't find dildos in big box stores, it is illegal
>rope
>condoms
>horsemask
>>685883447
Caspiar
is small island in the Caspian Sea
>>685883708
in every country in the world?
>>685883708
Fuck me of course
