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ITT we all live in a underground bunker.
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
You are currently reading a thread in /b/ - Random

Thread replies: 224
Thread images: 60
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ITT we all live in a underground bunker.
>>
Kinda musty ain't it.
>>
More musty than the inside of a locker room.
>>
>>684068146
>/b/
>underground bunker
>basement
>>
>>684068342
yeah but it's, like, a basement with a lot of levels. and you have a good excuse not to go outside.
>>
>>684068146

WHO IS THAT FAPPING?????

FAPPING ON MY CHAMBER DOOR????
>>
Alright, this is the last fucking time I'm going to ask.
WHO ATE MY FUCKING GINGERNUT COOKIES?
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>>684068480
There are finger prints.
Rally up. We will find this nigger
>>
I am the overseer! And i clam this land as vault 420
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>>684068463
It me. Welcome to Pripyat.
>>
>>684068146
Too much rape for me, I think I'll pass.
>>
>be me
>work in solid waste recycling
>new guy arrives, asks how it is down here
It's a shit job
>over 9000 kek
>employee of the month until my untimely death at the hands of cloned super Teddy Roosevelt
>>
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>>684068463
IT WAS ME, YOU FAGGOT

WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO ABOUT IT

NEVERMORE
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>>684068590
>Not Deus Vult
Shame on you.
>>
>>684068578
I-IT'S JUST... LIKE THEY DIDN'T EVEN CARE.
I WILL FIND THAT FUCKING RANGA IF THAT'S THE LAST THING I'LL DO!
>>
Alright. Head count. How many bastards? Say aye, women don't count.
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>>684068146

I would like this. knowing that everyone around me was a 4chan user.
>>
>>684068861
AYE.
I'M WITH MY FRIEND, DETECTIVE PHELPS.
>>
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>>684068861
Aye lmao
>>
>>684068692

thank you for the kek.
>>
SO, ANYONE WANNA HEAR A JOKE WHILE WE SEARCH FOR THE CRIMINAL?
>>
>>684068861
Ayeooy vey goyim
>>
guise im going outside. we need more shroomz.
>>
Is polishing my shoes bad to do in such a small enviroment? All these fumes are really getting to me...
>>
>>684070511
NO, IT'S FINE.
JUST DON'T STEAL MY COOKIES.
>>
Sorry guys, shitter's full.
>>
So we gonna get this orgy started or what?
>>
>>684070668
2 l8 4 th@
>>
>>684070914
AH.
SO YOU WERE THE ONE THAT ATE MY COOKIES.
...
BEND OVER. I'M GOING IN DRY.
>>
>>684068146
we all get cancer from radon exposure.
>>
>>684068146
[farts directly in front of air inlet at surface]
>>
I'm fag
I need release!
>>
>>684071453
OH COME THE FUCK ON! IT'S HARD ENOUGH DEALING WITH THE FACT THAT A SHOE POLISHER ATE MY COOKIES, AND NOW YOU WANT TO DO THIS BULLSHIT?
>>
>>684068146
If dubs, the bomb goes off.
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>>684068146
Vault-Tec Rep 1: Whoa, what in the holy hell happened here, What experiment was being run in this vault again?

Vault-Tec Rep 2: There was no experiment, and this isn't one of our bunkers...

Vault-Tec Rep 1: Mother Of God.
>>
inb4shittersclogged
>>
How long til we lose internet and we actually have to come out and talk to each other personally?
>>
>>684071688
HO. LY. SHIT.
>>
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>>684071878
person ally?

you commie cuntlicker!
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>>684071928
holicker!
>>
>>684071920
>>684072073
Ho cuntlicker.

Perfect.
>>
>>684072073
Person anally
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>>684068146
ghosts walk these halls, faggot
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>>684068146
Hey, I just made the first successful human clone! I shall name him Gary.
>>
>>684068146
It is kinda warm on level 5 again, please check the airconditioning!
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>>684072427
TELL GARY TO CHANGE HIS SHIRT. HOLY SHIT, DOES IT LOOK TACKY.
>>
>>684068146
I give it a week before the water filter system blows out from getting clogged with baby batter.
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>>684068146
I think we shouldn't have vote for trumps
>>
Just so you know I'm going to fuck all your children one by one then skin them alive and ware thier soft tender skin while I fuck each one of you.
>>
>>684068146
Gee sure is boring around here, what's for dinner?
>>
>>684068342
/thread
>>
>>684072734
JOKES ON YOU, I WON'T HAVE ANY CHILDREN!
H-HEHHEH...
>>
>>684072826
>>684071688
Did you not see the bomb go off in the bunker? And you're calling it boring. The bunker is filling with dirt right now, thanks to the massive hole in the hull.
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>>684072734
Jokes on you, I already ate my children.
>>
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Don't mind me, just having some here
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>>684068146

lets open the door. ya know. some fresh air and stuff
>>
Ok, which one of you fucks stole my rarest and dankest Pepe?!?!
>>
>>684073075

lemme out. seriously.
>>
>>684072991
maybe in some magical faggot universe where the arbitrary faggot decides that "dubs" do things in a hypothetical situation. Learn how to play in the sandbox...
>>
>>684073170
THE SAME ASSHOLE WHO STOLE MY GINGERNUT COOKIES. I ALREADY DISPOSED HIM, YOUR PEPE IS IN THE BACK.
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>>684073170
I did. And I made a cool 100 internets off of it to that nigger over there.
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>>684073272

this isn't funny. i really really want to get out. MEOW.
>>
Shitter is clogged
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I nominate Ho Cuntlicker as Supreme Over'tard!
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>>684073272
You want fresh air, go sit near the air filter.
Me, I am huffing all the medical oxygen. Get your own air.
>>
>>684073350
SURE, THE DOOR IS OPENED. DON'T MIND THE BLOOD, JOHN WILL CLEAN IT UP LATER.
>>
So, when do we start to cannibalize the tards that we have locked away?
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>>684068146
When does the rape start?
>>
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>kills doge, his wife and himself
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>>684073170
>>
>>684073500

john? but. but. john died whien the strapped up fat girl landed on his neck while he was trying to clean her smegma.
>>
>>684073564
PROBABLY... NEXT WEEK.
WE NEED TO EXPLOIT THEM. FOR SCIENCE, OF COURSE.
>>
>>684073350
There is only one way out. That way is death.
What makes you want to leave friend? we want you to stay with us... down here.. forever.
>>
>>684073706

NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>
>>684071453
Why not take a shit in it?
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>>684073679
THEN I'LL FUCKING MAKE HIM CLEAN IT UP. JUST BECAUSE HE'S DEAD.
BACK IN MY DAY, WE WERE GRATEFUL TO GET JOBS! ALL WE DID WAS STARVE AND OCCASIONALLY BEAT UP THE NERD DOWN THE STREET.
GOOD TIMES.
>>
Shit. Guys, you remember that human clone I made and named Gary? Seems he learned the process and has started cloning himself.
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>>684073579
Just for you, right now bby
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>>684073350
>>
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>>684073583
Hey anon mind helping me with somethi-
>>
>>684073889
I FUCKING TOLD YOU TO MAKE HIM CHANGE HIS SHIRT.
BLOODY IDIOT.
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>>684073889
Your first mistake was not cloning a loli.
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>>684073845

are you going to shove sticks in his appendages and make him a mannequin? john was always such a good jokester.
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>>684074120
EXACTLY. I REMEMBER WHEN WE MADE HIM EAT THE WEEK OLD MEDICINE. I STILL REMEMBER THE STENCH.
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>>684073889
Gary? Gary!

Gaaaaaaaaary!
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can we grow weed?
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>>684074228

i dont think that was medicine...
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>>684074037
I didn't realize the shirt would make him so smart. What fucking shirt does this? This isn't Kill La Kill.

>>684074070
And you, sir. No, I got nothing. Carry on.
>>
>>684074291
SEE? NOW LOOK AT HIM.
NOW HE LOOKS LIKE A PAKEHA. WHAT THE FUCK, MAN.
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>>684074291
Oh fuck! Get me my gun! Either they go or I'm Kurt Cobaining it
>>
>>684074343
IT WASN'T? THAT EXPLAINS THE 'CUMMING OUT' JOKE WE PULLED...
>>
>>684074291
Don't worry, I broke the cloning machine. There won't be anymore Garys popping up.
>>
>>684074291
Well as long as they don't militarize-
oh
>>
>>684074505

i dont think john needed to cum out..
>>
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Rents due friday anons, pay up or fuck off
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>>684074669
Wait, when the fuck did we get outside?
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>>684074799
The walls are painted sky color
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>>684068146
hay my fellow /b/ros hows your friday afternoon bit hot in darwin hay
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Armor bro here........anyone seen paul blart?
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>>684068146
>>
>>684074832
Oh man, isolation and confinement is gonna do us all in.
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>>684074773
WELL, IT WOULDN'T MATTER IN THE SLIGHTEST. THE EXIT'S OPEN. BLOOD IS EVERYWHERE. JOHN'S CLEANING IT, WHETHER HE LIKES IT OR NOT.
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>>684074988
Naw, sorry, think you got the wrong bunker. Try the other one down that way. Careful, though, they have lots of cats.
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>>684073051
seen this one b4 but god damn
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>>684075134
And that's where the term "trouser snake" comes from.
>>
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I propose we use our new >>684074291 >>684074669 Grand Army of The /b/unker to attack the villainous Mole People.
We will catch them off guard
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>>684074797

i gots you some white wimmin to pay for my first month....?
>>
>>684075315
Too bad Pizza Hut was so shit-tier. That's one thing I won't miss outside this bunker.
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>>684075118
Oh. Well if your interested i have a robco pipboy 3000 with 13 gigs of gay furry porn on it. Its a relic from vault 666. Only 200 caps. 100 if you van delete the gayfur porn. Let me warn you. Many have tried.
>>
>>684075315
Good work anon, I like you I'm gonna call you gary
>>
>>
>>684075530
Nooo! There are too many Garys already!
>>
Hey guys I think I just contaminated our water supply with ricin.
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>>684075606
I like them too!
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>>684075642
THE RICIN!
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>>684075732
WHY DON'T YOU MARRY THEM THEN, YOU HAND-HOLDER?
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>>684075452

is this more to your liking?
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>>684075642
Fuck that's all we need, now we're gonna get Asians
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>>684075818
Fuck you gary
>>
>>684075888
>>684076000
Two trips in a row. I think this is a sign of the end times for the bunker.
>>
>>684076000
DON'T CALL ME GARY, YOU FUCKING RANGA.
I'LL BEAT YOU SO FUCKING HARD, THEY'LL CALL ME MICHAEL JACKSON. WHAT DO YOU EVEN HAVE? I HAVE JANDALS. I'LL WRECK YOU ANYDAY.
>>
Op here. I left this unattended and it went out of control real fucking fast. I thought this thread died when it hit pg 4
>>
Armor bro again. Just a word of warning. Vaults have a bad habit of destabilised inhabitants. See in the vault im from we had a social stigma where people were forced into becoming sex slaves. We had quite alot of them. It all started when someone opened the door to the zoo level and all the niggers got lose. I see you have a clone problem......i would GTFO fast if i were you. Its already starting to degrade here. Vault 420 is doomed.
>>
>>684076199
it only improved with your absence.
>>
>>684076199
You're supposed to be the overseer, OP. It's your fault all these Garys exist.
>>
First action to be taken as overseer. Kill all Gary's. Yolocaust
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>>684076193
I have gary... check mate anon
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>>684076445
I'LL BE RIGHT BEHIND YOU, MY FRIEND!
>>
>>684076445
>Yolocaust.
Nope, mutiny time.
>>
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>>684075277
Since there is no opposition, the motion carries.
The remaining Gary Clones will be sent through the Mole Tunnels where they will invade Castle Mole. There they will catch the Mole People by surprise, and bring an end to this destructive conflict.
Once more The /b/unker still rule the underworld, and we shall have peace
>>
But first, shitters clogged.
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>>684076482
EXCEPT GARY DOESN'T EXIST! IF HE IS A CLONE, THEN WHO IS THE ORIGINAL? WHAT IS A FAKE USEFUL FOR? NOTHING, THAT'S WHAT.
>>
It begins....your all going to die. Its vault 666 all over again!!!
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Making this thread was a mistake.
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>>684076762
Making (you) was a mistake
>>
>>684076651
Well one of them is currently unclogging the shitter so the jokes on you
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>>684076651
If the clones aren't real, >>684076622
Then what the hell are we sending to the Mole People?!
>>
>>684076622
Sabotages the Gary's weapons.
>>
>>684076762
Letting this many people into the vault was a mistake. And there's only 42 people here. Not including all the Garys.
>>
>>684076919
AH, WE'RE JUST SENDING ALL OF THE TARDS OVER THERE. IT'LL BE FINE.
>>684076832
I THINK THE REAL JOKE HERE IS YOUR FAITH IN YOUR 'LORD AND SAVIOUR', GARY.
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>>684077116
His name is gary glitter king of unclogging the shitter!
>>
Armorbro: Im licking myself in the reactor room ive seen this shit before in vault 666. Btw YOUR ALL GARYS. Overseer is the orginal! *Seals maglock door*
>>
Garys all around, our overseer is a yolofag. Armorbro now sealed in the reactor room, having all control over the fate of this place. Fuck it. Fuck all y'all and this bunker. I'm going over to the cat bunker.
>>
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>>684076919
>>684076921
>we sent the Mole People sabatoged weapons
Excellent plan anon. The fiendish Mole People will try to retaliate, mistakingly with the sabatoged weapons. They will attempt to storm the /b/unker, but we shall be prepared.
ARM YOURSELVES MEN
>>684077363
In reality, we were the Garys
>>
>>684077363
YOUR MUM IS A GARY!
>>684077265
OH. HOW GREAT. HE CAN UNCLOG THE SHITTER. THAT'S SO AMAZING, THAT I MIGHT HAVE A HEART ATTACK AND DIE.
>>
>>684077651
No time for shitter!
The moles are breaking in!
>>
>>684077880
PUNT THE BASTARDS!
>>
>>684077651
I find your lack of faith in gary disturbing
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>>684077509
.......wait theres really a cat vault? I thought you were trolling!
>>
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>>684078041
They're sending us reinforcements nao, to help fight the devilish Mole People
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>>684068146
All non-whites are being kicked out.

This is a white man's bunker.
>>
>>684077953
WELL, I FIND YOUR LACK IN TASTE DISTURBING.
NO WONDER GARY HATED YOU.
>>
The arrival of the Mole Army
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>>684078407
ALRIGHT, HERE'S WHAT WE DO:
WE SHIT ON THEM. WE CUT THEM WITH THE EDGE OF OUR POSTS. THEN WE WIN.
>>
>>684078166
W-would YOU be interested in a pipboy full of gay fur porn? Its a collectible from the famous vault 666.
>>
>>684078571
Don't worry we have Shiggy on our side
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>>684068455
and at the deepest point lives the Lord of the Weaboos, a 40 year old man-child of legend
his fedora-tipping is said to m'lady the shit out of you
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>>684078762
I'm from Vault 666... Hey, that's my pipboy!
>>
Hello, Artyom.
>>
And thus, the Battle of The /b/unker comes to an end.
Not a single Mole survived.
The tyranny of King Moleman has come to an end; as peace, justice, and /b/ live on, for centuries to come.
>>
Judging by the sudden silence, I suspect the mole men won.
>>
>>684078252
That hurts anon! Even if it's true you didn't have to say it
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>>684079501
SOOOO... WHAT NOW?
DO WE... YOU KNOW... KILL GARY?
>>
>>684078959
Na dude i told dave to fix it and instead he put the fur porn on it. Then dave got killed by one of the sexslaves in the ballpit which was really a drug pit filled with shit and syringes. I then traded the pipboy for hunnit caps. All the while niggers and sex slaves abound. Some mutant irradiated mexican shit in our ventilation shaft. While me sex slave number 7 and paul blart used segways to stop a reactor meltdown. I know nigga i was in that thread. Shit got real. Hence why im in the reactor room. But yes its a fine pipboy and it has the unique ability of opening the surface door. All yours for 200 hunnit caps.
>>
>>684079630
That's the thing anon.
There never really was a Gary.
In reality we were Gary.
Gary is inside of us all.
In our hearts, dreams, and souls.
And as long as we remember this day, Gary will forever live on
>>
>>684079947
I think I found the original Gary.
>>
>>684079947
WHO'S GARY AGAIN? I FORGOT.
>>
>>684079947
Praise our lord and savior Gary
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>>684079511
Thats right! Now give me access to your computers and retube!! Also checked.
>>
Hi. I just moved in next door. Any chance you have a cup of sugar?
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>>684080257
Great now we got niggers
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>>684080257
SURE. RIGHT HERE.
>>
What the fuck?? Your guys reactor is twelve car batteries plugged into a banana. Cut into the banana is the word GARY.
>>
>>684080336
Hey, maybe they'll be Jemima Witnesses and we can get free pancakes and waffles.
>>
>>684080436
THAT WAS LARRY'S IDEA.
HE'S DEAD NOW.
>>
>>684080512
Or maybe there steal your bike
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>>684080597
It's got no chain or tires anyway, so they can have at it.
>>
>>684080527
Well i dont see how this kindof power setup would even work to supply your vault with electricity. Also maybe someone should calm moleman down hes gonna start a fire.
>>
>>684080649
I said bike but meant you mom
>>
>>684080083
>>684080086
>>684080139
Now that we have come to truly understand the meaning of Gary, we must finish our conquest.
We march to Moletown, where we shall sack the village.
Loot to your heart's content.
Wipe out any remaining Mole People, whether it be man, woman, or child.
We take no prisoners.
>>
>>684080763
One of the Garys must've let you out of the tard floor down in the lower levels.
>>
>>684080731
YOU SEE, IT WORKS BECAUSE WE ASK IT NICELY. MERCY IS ALWAYS THE BEST OPTION.
>>
>>684080763
Pwnd
>>
>>684080845
CAN I TAKE THE GINGERNUT COOKIES?
>>
>>684080845
I find your lack of raping disturbing anon
>>
>>684080937
Take all of them
>>684080940
You may rape while there, must I remind you this is Mole pussy you will be dealing with.
>>
>>684081065
Still better then nigger pussy
>>
>>684080881
Im just gonna replace it with an actual fusion cell.........
>>
>>684081180
FINE. DON'T SAY WE DIDN'T WARN YOU.
>>
>>684081292
The doors mag locked feggit what na?!!
>>
>>684081373
SPEAK CLEARLY. THIS IS A FAMILY FRIENDLY BOARD, YOU FUCKING FAGGOT.
>>
Alright, this thread was fun, but now it's time to let it die, niggers.
>>
The Sacking of Moletown
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>>684081503
Fuck you gary!
>>
>>684081503
NO. WE WILL KEEP THIS THREAD ALIVE. WE'RE LIKE NICKELODEON, WE'LL KEEP THIS SHIT GOING UNTIL IT GETS OLD.
>>
>>684081557
That's jewtown
>>
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>>684081645
>We sacked the wrong town
The Jews will strike back, I fear another war on the horizon.
>>
>>684081745
It's ok sandnigger town next door is already on it
>>
>>684081832
>More vaults getting involved
War of The Underground will break out as nearby by towns unite to fight
>>
>>684081465
Ima gigglesnip ya m8!
>>
>>684081939
Fuck were is gary when you need him?
>>
What the hell is going on down there.
>>
>>684081984
gg no re
>>
>>684082065
Fritz the master builder!! were saved everyone
>>
>>684082065
Nuthins goin on down here go about your business.
>>
>>684082112
Pic related. Its you.
>>
>>684082367
SAUCE?
>>
>>684082526
I see what you did there
>>
>>684082008
Our only allies are Cat Corner, Sandnigger Town, and The Worm Republic.
We're pitted against Jewtown, The Tunnelsnakes, The Confederacy of Nig Nogs, and any remaining forces of The Mole Empire.
Looks like we're fucked boys.
EVACUATE THE VAULT
>>
>>684068146
I wish there was underground apartments with like 4 feet of dirt between each apartment so you couldn't here your neighbors jacking off.

Also I could practice singing
>>
>>684082713
WE DON'T HAVE TO! Y-YOU CAN STAY, RIGHT?
>>
>>684082870
It's too late the collapse of the vault has begun.
I'll stay back to fight Emperor Jew.
That's right I was wymin the whole time
>>
>>684082729
I too want to practice singing anon... if you build it I will come
>>
>>684068146
Literally Shakespeare the thread
>>
>>684083444
AND IT ALL STARTED WITH COOKIES.
>>
>>684083554
GReen wookies
cookie monsters
>>
>>684083554
There's just too much to screencap.
The story concludes with the evacuation of The /b/unker while Femanon and Emperor Jew battle it out amidst the destruction of the vault.
>>
>>684073051
O_O What!? Is this for real
>>
>>684084572
no just unsee it, it isn't real. it was shopped
>>
>>684080436
I really really really like this reactor.
>>
>>684084811
yeah you better believe that
>>
Oh shit PURGE the bunker version.
Thread replies: 224
Thread images: 60
Thread DB ID: 37962



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