My bosses are capitalist fuckheads, so for the past month I've been sabotaging shit in the office.
I've run out of things to do.
Does anyone have any good ideas to cause chaos but not get caught?
Mixup the cafeinated and decafeinated coffee jars.
>>683628599
Poop your pants at a meeting and watch as everyone tries to figure out what smells like shit.
flush the toilet paper. All of it. Block the shitter.
>>683628599
think about it okay ?
if he was not you would be jobless
useless retard kill yourself
Hide shrimp everywhere.
When they go off, they are nasty smelling shit.
>>683628599
you could organize a union at your workplace
Dial international on meeting room phone and leave it going
>>683628599
kek you should rape their daughters
that'll show them
>>683628599
Take a shit and throw it at the windows.
steal stationary and just dump it.
Turn off the office fridge on Friday and let it warm up the milk over the weekend.
Hide a cellphone in the ceiling LOL
Put plastic in the toaster.
>>683629088
That's straight devilish well done anon
Leave a leaking ink pen on the fancy meeting room chair fabric
manup and tell 'em it's you f'ing s$#@ up.
Puss
Fire alarm test.
>>683628599
How dare you bosses be interested in corporate responsible policies. I mean, what kind of asshole wants to maximize profits and run an efficient company? I'm pretty sure by the sound of it, you are punishing them enough my your sheer existence...
Liberals everyone
>>683629545
No way mate. I like my income. I just hate my cunt of a boss.
Oh and swear like a man you Catholic.
Leave a skylight open over the weekend so the rain wrecks the computers.
Constantly through out paper.
Constantly print out all the paper.
Constantly shred paper.
Superglue in the keyholes.
Never flush
Just leave rubbish everywhere.
Graffitti shit.
>>683628818
>Poop your pants at a meeting
scat humor..............le merchant detected
>>683628599
give us some examples of what you did
Pin things on other employees. Leave food in their desk. when it starts to smell mention that "blank" hoards food in his desk. Put food in the fridge with your boss's name on it.
>>683628599
>>Capitalist fuckheads
...still profiting from their business....
Go kill yourself you self-entitled parasite.
Say "so and so told me the boss likes scat porn." The idea is to spread rumors started by other people.
>>683630474
Well cleaners refused to pick up our empty coffee mugs now as the boss doesn't pay them enough. So when I'm finished with my empty mug I just wander to a common area of the office and leave it there.
I organise meetings and schedule it in my diary and go bowling for a couple of hours.
I eat other peoples food from the fridge.
I jam the photcopiers and just leave them all fucked up and shit.
I print porn and leave it on high shelves where it can blow off onto the floor.
I throw rubbish on the floor.
I eat skanky smelly food like curries and shit and stink the office out.
Plant a computer virus.
>>683631272
nah too traceable
Sometimes I spoon the sugar into the coffee jar and slightly rip tea bags.
Print out a small middle finger in the corner of every page of paper in the printer. put it back in upside down and shuffled in other paper. It might take a week to find.
>>683631159
well any more?
that porn one does have potential though
what kind of porn?
>>683631503
fuck thats a good one.
>>683629738
Watch your fucking mouth, cussing is not acceptable goddamnit!
>>683629545
whats the matter, mommy doesnt let you use naughty words?
>>683631272
I second that
>>683631159
You're likely to get fired if they find out its you for a few of those.
>>683631548
Yeah.
I spill milk everywhere. When that shit dries it stinks like hell.
I've removed the wheel from three office chairs. That pisses off people no end.
I removed three strips from the vertical blinds in the sunny window and now direct sunlight pastes its way across the office all summer morning.
20 bucks says OP is just a lazy nigger and is mad at his bosses bc they won't let him sleep on the job
>>683631977
Nah. Pissed offf whitebohfag. Who's laboured for years and not got enywhere.
What do you do for a living?
The best thing to do would be to hurt the business.
>>683632086
he's probably gotten nowhere bc instead of filing papers or wtv tf op's supposed to do, he's too busy fucking shit up in the company instead of trying to make it better. OP is a perfect example of what is wrong with America: People expect to not do shit and then get rewarded for it. Fucking hell.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vc6PK7aqTO0
>>683631159
>>683631898
Knot the cord on the blinds so they are stuck open. Leave the porn in the paper tray of copier. Find naked pics that look like coworkers and leave them about.
>>683632086
ohh okay, so thats not your fault?
of course not!
it's those greedy capitalist swine!
>>683632522
Oh come off it with the "WATS WRONG WITH AMERICA IS THAT PEOPLE DON'T WANT TO ACCEPT SHIT WAGES FOR SHIT TIER WORK"
OP probably has a college education and can do all sorts of shit but is stuck doing nonsense for rich corporate assholes who pay him next to nothing.
>>683629000
Trips has spoken
>>683628599
keylogger
backdoor the server
slacken the pipework under all sinks
put open cans of tuna in the heating/cooling ducts
tip off the law about possible cheese pizza on someones computer
walk dog shit into the building everyday "by mistake"
invest in live mousetraps catch a fuckload of mice and let them go in the building .
buy cream cakes and leave them in the office fridge everyday, but jizz in one of them each day.
>>683632667
Thank you. I thought people on the internet would have better fucking sense than this. Goddammit.
>>683632667
Well it is actually. They charge me minimum wages for years until I advanced my skills inhouse and now for years they've paid me fuck all and refuse to give me pay increases but insist I work huge amounts of overtime.
How about you just quit your fucking job, go work for someone that you'd like working for and stop being such a whiny little cunt.
Put salt in the sugar box
Make a screenshot of desktops, use this as wallpaper, hide the taskbar and delete all the shit on the desktop
Put post-its under the mouses
Buy an annoy-a-tron (google and DON'T PAY WITH CC) and hide it in the boss office
>>683632774
that pretty much says it
>>683632781
Self witness
>>683632774
I see where you're coming from, but fucking w execs isn't going to solve diddly fucking squat. If anything, it's just going to worsen his situation.
>>683632787
BRILLIANT!
ITT: butthurt berniecucks
>>683632950
fucking w execs isn't going to solve anything though
>>683632787
The cheese pizza might be good.
Clog the toilet, then poop in it.
Bowl of candy, all sugar free.
>>683633129
pretty much.
>>683633063
Yes but it does make me feel much better.
It gives me hidden power!
>>683633063
I don't think it'll make it worse or solve it.
I think the goal is to piss off the rich people who make these decisions and believe in some system that marginalizes people for dumb reasons.
>>683632893
That's still your fault nigger. Jesus you libs are pathetic
>>683633290
How mature. I'm sure you'll get far in life with that attitude.
I do this but it will cost money.
Buy a phone signal jammer and turn it on everytime you hear bosses on the phone. theyre illegal in some countries but awesomely work
>>683633378
Its not always libs. Know a guy who blames obama for losing his job and losing all his toys he had financed. Idiots are idiots.
>>683633369
Ever heard of Russia?
>>683633470
it makes me feel better though ant thats the whole point numbat
>>683633716
u do u, but i'm just saying that this is not the way to go about it.
>>683633627
this do this and post a video of your boss when you do it
>>683633685
I'm a libertarian, I just hate liberals far more than conservatives. As far as I'm concerned, learn a useful skill and fight for a good wage or earn slave pennies with the rest of the unskilled cucks. Not my problem if people starve
>>683633807
If you can come up with a better working solution then Im all for it. But frankly nothing makes me feel happier than tormenting my boss with these childish fucking pranks. I dont give a fuck man.
>>683633891
true
>>683633627
That is hyper illegal. Interfering with telecom is a felony
>>683628599
start up your own competing business
>>683634008
That's fine, eventually you'll get caught and fired, the execs will still have just as much cash and you'll be fighting for another shitty job with the rest of the unskilled cucks. You sure showed them!
>>683634008
kek. respect the honesty.
>>683634049
I know I know but the peace it brings. You buy one of these from China man. You charge it up Turn it on and all day long you get peace man. No ringtoines, no messgaes no facebook notificatons. Its so brilliant. I use it on the bus now on my way to and from work. Its amazing how quiet people are.
>>683634257
kek
>>683634178
He's too much of a cuck to man up. He'd rather just crybaby on /b/ about muh income inequality
Send glitter via company mail to your company's head/CEO and sign it from a different member of middle management each time.
If you can find anthrax then even better.
>>683634257
I dont do all these things all the time, I spread them out over months and months. They havent got a fucking clue.
>>683634291
Look I'm all for peace and quiet, but telecom jamming falls under anti terrorism laws. They can lock your ass up for a very fucking long time and then you'll never have peace again.
Break a stink bomb in the staff fridge.
>>683634432
It only takes once
>>683628599
Quit the job, I'm sure them losing such a valuable and intelligent employee will throw them into complete disarray.
>>683634432
starting a competing business isn't a bad idea actually. i used to work for some other company as an office manager at the age of 25. I looked at what they did wrong and what the clients were missing from the company. I took that information, built my own company satisfying those other needs and started slowly taking away the companies' clients.
>>683634859
/thread
Create fake facebook profiles for all your bosses, have them post 'minion quotes' endlessly to any potential clients.
>>683634932
top fucking kek
Drop a mattress in the swimming pool. It will take a crane to get out.
Twist up some ketchup packets and leave them under the toilet seats at work
>2016
>tfw unions have been successfully crushed by the capitalist elite and the very people who need them most have been conditioned to hate them
>>683628773
Kek
>>683634008
maybe thats your problem OP
start giving a fuck about your own life and maybe you could work your way outta there.
Or just keep pooping without wiping. Im sure these tricks will help better yourself.
>>683628599
>gets mad saying bosses are capitalist fuckheads
probably works at subway and is mad that they worked hard earned their money and are using it to make more money and he isnt getting anything.
>>683628964
If we didn't have capitalist fuckheads ruling over us, the work we carry out would actually mean something - we'd be hunting, fishing, cooking, building, farming, mining, etc. It would be healthy and meaningful and not to let some asshole in a fucking penthouse be able to afford his 5th sports car
>>683634586
oh he will have piece alright... but not the piece he wants.
>>683628773
Stab all the tea bags to make a hole that you wouldn't notice and they will get tea leaves in their mouths which is a bit annoying
>>683631159
>I eat other peoples food from the fridge.
i hope somebody prepares you a tasty chicken salad with inconspicuous broken glass sandwich soon, that's what i'd do if my food went missing
>>683629545
You have no idea where you are anon, do you?
>>683631159
print porn and put it back in the paper tray, not on top either, so at random points, someone's gonna print out a page with porn on the back, or even better someone's going to outright print porn mixed with work.
>>683633378
How is it his fault that his nosses refuse to give him a promotion when he's clearly capable? This is the flawed right wing logic that lets the shit continue. You bitch about inefficiency, how is that not inefficient?
>>683633891
Did you not read the part where OP has a college degree?
>>683629545
Summer is close
>>683628599
Shoot the place up and wear your pro letist shit on the day you do it.
>>683635833
You do know you still have the ability to do all these things right? People live in the woods all the time, fuck off there.
You could fuck a pig while fucking your own ass in the conference room, that will show them. Then maybe jump off the roof head first.
>>683635535
Kek
>>683628599
Top-Tank.
if you haven't Top-Tanked 'em,
you haven't done shit
>>683636488
but i do, only i expected better from u
I hate my boss, oh wait im my own boss. Im not the type of person that needs a leader. Im typically a leader. I decided id be the leader and shit im leading.
If you dont like your boss, Go become a boss.
Youll have your boss at work or youll have a dictator that forces you to give to the state. One of the two options you have your own power and choice. The other youll be subject to force if you disobey.
bro tip its the pro government anti capitalist state.
>>683631159
>food
The same part of me that would offer advice for your 'plots' would also have poisoned 'my' food for you to consume.
OP sounds like you're the fuck head. Where do you work?
>>683637393
Because that's the only job... Jesus Christ I have to give an economics lesson to libtards AGAIN. Well listen up dipshits, you might learn something.
In an open and free market, those that have developed marketable skills can find jobs doing what they're skilled at. If they are treated poorly, they can do the smart thing and work elsewhere where their skills are appreciated. Management that constantly drives away their employees to more tolerable businesses will eventually put their own company out of business.
Capitalism really isn't rocket science
>>683628599
Hey bros,
my bosses, who pay my salary and keep me employed, are capitalists. So for the past month, I've been working hard and earning my pay, because I appreciate having gainful employment.
One of my asshole coworkers keeps sabotaging shit in the office - what do?
>>683628599
move to china or quit ur job
it is your own fault you don't have a good job, if you don't want responsibility GET THE FUCK OUT
>>683637695
Oh boy, another butthurt libtard who's buttmad about his worthless piece of paper
>>683628599
>>683628599
Quit. Pussy.
>>683639234
There are plenty of jobs here. I love you left wing nuts that think we have no options. Also, without the governments regulations we would be allowed to start our own business a hell of a lot easier. Starting business is tough and the government makes it damn near impossible.
Keep putting a child porn poster up in the cubicles
>>683639214
Rat on him and get him canned like he deserves, or take him in the alley and give him a good asskicking
>>683639214
noice
>>683639607
This
>>683632086
You should have gotten a job in government, you'd be the head of some alphabet soup agency by now.
Greentext the stuff you've done
>>683631159
Are you a shit skin?
You sound Indian.
>>683639607
I think you mentioned the wrong person
>>683636239
Oh boo hoo. I work security and always treat the staff fridge like a buffet, get over it you packed lunch wanker.
>>683639202
This is probably somebody that doesn't understand bills and living expenses. Or he may have a family anf other responsibilities. Not everyone can just drop what little they have on a gamble for something better that may or may not work.
Also, if the job he wants is there and he's continually cucked over it why should he leave? It also depends on what OPs degree is in.
If it was as simple as you make it sound then people wouldn't avoid doing it.
>>683639694
But my college professors taught me that everybody deserves everything they want with no effort in return.
Wouldn't I be depriving him of his essential human right to be an asshole if I got him fired? After all, he doesn't LIKE working hard, and who am I to judge?
We have to respect and embrace a diversity of thought and opinion, I don't wanna be intolerant of his right to be a shithead!
"I keep fucking shit up at work. Why am I not getting paid more?"
>>683639838
I already did fucktard
>>683628599
Capitalism isn't a bad thing, you fucking retard.
It's because of capitalism that you can go out there and do whatever the fuck you want to do for a job (as long as it's legal).
You fucking half retarded millennials are such a joke.
Take a shit right next to the toilet.
>>683637695
In Media Studies probably.
>>683639370
I could care less. Unskilled =/= college degree. It's more about reading the fucking thread
>>683639918
>works security
kek
>>683631159
>diary
what the fuck?
>>683629545
I love that you censured shut. Fucking fag
>>683628599
throw a mattress in the swimming pool.
>>683638134
Better yet, yell a hebrew chant as you're doing it just to really put the journalists in an awkward spot.
Make it physiological.
whisper people names then when they say did you say something say no .
make people.
have dejavu drop the same book a couple of times a day in front of the same person making sure to say the same words after. A couple of months this they will think they are crazy
>>683640256
Kek
>>683640172
Clearly you don't know what greentexting is. Fucktard
>>683640067
I haven't been caught yet. I don't tell anyone at work I do it and I have to be honest I'm of the generation that doesn;t give a fuck about the corporation. Im not of the generation that gives a fuck about the career. Im of the generation that is thinking about me. And am having a ball totallly fucking with the office atmosphere.
Half empty bottle of apple juice + little bit of yeast will explode nasty yellow rancid cancer slime everywhere after about four days.
>>683639214
Shit in your lunchbox so he finds it.
>>683639971
> may have a family
Boo fucking hoo, I didn't force anybody to fuck without birth control
> doesn't understand bills
Kek I do, that's why I don't create unnecessary ones for myself. I live modestly and save my cash for investment
> if it was as simple...
It is. People are fucking lazy and lack initiative, that's why execs give them shit wages
>>683640244
I did that but I forgot to mention. They sent an email around asking if anyone knew. It was fucking hilarious. And cos our office is all liberal n shit the toilets are unisex and the boss's wife found it. I almost died laughing.
Shit in a small container every day and put that in the company freezer. Pile that shit up lmao. Eventually someone will open it and see a can of frozen shit. Ha ha bitch! Yeah! You now have a can of FROZEN SHIT in your hands. Maybe that person will get a new nickname - Sub Shit or Shit Zero
>>683628599
You could roll trips
>>683640371
Never said I was proud of it. ;)
>>683639607
>Starting a business is tough
>In America
>>683632522
something tells me OP is a britfag anyway
>>683640304
>could care less
2/10 made me reply
>>683640304
> could care less
You mean COULDN'T, fucking dipshit
I did read the thread, the fact that he has a degree means next to nothing to me and to a lot of employers. Only libtards think degrees are the absolute indicator of employability.
>>683640402
Yeah I diarise it so noone can invite me to any of their stupid meetings where I sit around with nothing to say playing on my phone. I was asked about one of my meetings once I said I arrived at the office for the meeting but it was cancelled. I went for brews at the bowls with a mate.
>>683640609
Okay then
"I have a childish attitude and waste valuable work hours that I can spend trying to better myself in the workplace, but instead face my problems by fucking shit up. I have no clue why I'm not getting paid more."
>btw, if you know you're acting like a shithead, don't whine about the outcomes from doing so on the internet
>>683635833
yeah man with an expected lifespan of 30, and 6 of your 10 children dead before the age of 3.
Bad teeth, smell like shit, knowing nothing about the world. Enjoy your time.
>>683640427
Throw 3 mattresses into the swimming pool and number them 1, 2 and 4. The cranes will spend all day looking for number 3.
>>683632774
Fuck you and your weak kneed faggotry.
Act like a man
work like a man
grow as a man.
NAH, WHY DO THAT WHEN YOU CAN BE AN ENTITLED SHIT YOU THINKS HE DESERVES SHIT.
Pro tip: His bosses know he isn't worth a fuck. It's called age and experience.
Swap the sugar and the salt in the canteen.
>>683640582
Its not a greentext continuing story you abortion bucket. Its a series of tasks. Learn what Greentexting is all about you soggy fagcum stained biscuit eating pirate.
>>683640689
nice ! I read that ylyl story I might try that
>>683628599
Sleep with your bosses son or brother
>>683628599
Stop being a passive aggresive cunt.
Awww, mommy, they don't love me as much as you doooooo.
I'm gonna leave dirty dishes in the sink, that'll show 'em.
Reality check: You are a loser, and blaming others for your shortcomings will keep you living at home.
>>683640751
Are you really this retarded? If he has a family it's because he had a good entry level job and was expecting advancement which he clearly hasn't gotten. Just keep telling yourself everyone else is lazy, though. And enjoy living in niggerville.
>>683629088
Nothing says sabotage like potentially putting a company out of business
>>683641880
Your argument assumes facts not yet in evidence. I know plenty of people who manage to have families without first having a good entry level job.
Knocking a girl up is easy. Being prepared for it is hard.
Try harder, tryhard.
>>683629738
>Would rather enact childish revenge than just finding a better fucking job.
>>683641078
They're not, retard. It's pretty difficult to be unskilled and have a degree, though. Which is exactly what you said.
>>683642042
And these are irresponsible niggers. OP has a job so he clearly doesn't fit under this category.
>>683628599
cryptolocker the network/filesystems
>>683641854
Well Im not gunna go and do anything big like arson or terrorism or shit. Its all just tiny little annoyances that slowly grate away at the boss until he goes berko
Have sex with a load of kids while wearing a mask of your boss's face and leaving one of business cards at every scene.
>>683641880
He doesn't "deserve" anything. Just because he got a piece of toilet paper with his name scribbled on it doesn't automatically mean that he can just expect to become a millionaire whilst sitting on his ass. He has to man the fuck up and show initiative. Pranking HR is not going to get him anywhere in life.
>>683632911
>implying it's easy to get a job
>>683635833
We can have the benefits of capitalism without the associated greed from ultra capitalism. We just need to develop a type of tax structure that encourages growth of small businesses whilst discouraging foreign business and massive corps from establishing monopolies. Aka gov owned big business.
>>683637695
Holy fuck, a GENUINE COLLEGE DEGREE!!?!?!?!
SO RARE
WHAT AN ACCOMPLISHMENT
1 IN A MILLION
He should get a special prize, and be issued a company car and a secretary who gives blowjobs.
No one gives a shit you mook.
>>683642204
Actually, it's quite easy to have no useful skills. If your degree is in medieval french literature, what the fuck useful skills do you have in the labor market, other than "boat anchor"?
>>683632893
It's awful that they're forcing you to work there under those horrible conditions! Oh wait, you can leave any time...
>>683641880
No, if he has family it's because he decided to fuck without protection. Period.
> niggerville
> live in upper middle class college town
> 60k a year
> no kids
> own high end gaming rig, all new gen consoles, three vehicles
> bought overwatch and battleborn just because I can
> fuck my gf bareback on the daily because I bought her a copper iud
Stay jelly kiddo
>>683642347
>people with jobs can't be losers
Damn your standards are insanely low.
>>683642402
Top fucking kek
>>683642347
Again, assuming facts not in evidence.
I know plenty of irresponsible niggers with jobs - they serve me burgers and make monkey faces at me all the time.
>>683628964
Wage slave detected.
>>683642395
Get dog shit and smear it on his office door
>>683642540
Yeah but why would I when I can do all this shit.
>>683642469
kek
>>683637393
>How is it his fault that his bosses refuse to give him a promotion when he's clearly capable?
>Vandalizing office like a spoiled white trash cunt
Bosses know he's a shitheel. No one is quite as smart as they think...unless you're another standard issue twat millennial.
>>683642204
Absolutely false. I've met dozens of college grads that are absolutely fucking retarded and have no skills. I know technicians that have 10x the knowledge of the engineers they work for. College means literally nothing unless you're going into medical
>>683642422
I don't care what OP does and doesn't deserve. My whole point was you're projecting the whole wahh muh entitlement argument where it doesn't even apply. You can't be unskilled and have a college degree. Which you haven't even tried to counter. You just keep going off on other unrelated tangents.
>>683642693
I've bought this before and got revenge on my boss by spraying this on his doorknob and chair
http://www.liquidass.com/
>>683641919
Unions don't put companies out of business. Unions have a vested interest in the company's continued existence.
>>683637393
Idk. Maybe bc he's putting the blame on someone else instead of sucking it the fuck up and showing some goddamn initiative, you gook.
>>683639214
Ignore him, focus on you.
Enjoy the promotion, and make him clean the cigarette butts out of the parking lot, if you think he can manage it.
>>683642456
>Implying it's the market's fault that there aren't more jobs available.
>Not understanding that government created barriers to entry are the reason there's less competition meaning it's harder to get a job.
>>683628599
frame him for rape
I purposely spill coffee on the reception carpet. Its so fucking stained now it will never come out.
>>683643164
Right, because that's exactly how parasitic relationships works - the parasite NEVER kills its host!
>>683629644
>sucker of Ayn Rand's dick detected.
>>683643333
/thread
>>683628599
>>683628865
Pour cement down the toilet.
Wait around til the place closes so you're all alone, hang yourself in your office leaving behind a note saying you could no longer handle keeping your bosses secret that he killed a child and that he regularly touched your kids at 'bring your child to work' days but threatened to sack you if you told, that the resulting deep depression became too much to handle.
>>683632950
>but is stuck
Have they chained him to his desk? Put bars over his office door? Fuck off with this ignorance
>>683642857
You're special, aren't you? If you have a degree in African Drumming, you think you're going to be a skilled individual in the field of physics?
>>683643333
B-b-b-b-b-ut b-b-b-b-b-ro!
If I don't get paid 15 dollars an hour to microwave shitty pasta as a restaurant worker, how can I afford muh human dig-ma-tees?!!? I need an iPhone, and I need a widescreen flat panel tv. And I cannot LIVE without my Macbook Pro!
Fuck, you're a fascist!
>>683643464
>>683643528
Do both of these
>>683643464
lol hahaha
I reckon you should leave pubic hair all over the board room table.
Buy a load of child porn and put it in his desk drawer.
Leave used condoms with white substitute in toilets.
![rabidshave[1] - Copy.jpg](https://i.imgur.com/CdZm1U8.jpg "rabidshave[1] - Copy.jpg")
drag your bare ass across the boss's desk
>>683637695
Considering he's bitching he probably didn't pursue a STEM field which means that piece of paper is probably worthless.
Release three pigs in the office numbered 1, 2 and 4, it'll take a crane to get them out.
>>683644146
OP majors in African Drums
Buy a bag of sugarless gummy bears and put them out. Watch them all run to the bathroom with explosive diarrhea
>>683635938
a piece of dick xD am i right guys
>>683643372
It's not a parasitic relationship though. Everyone involved in a business is dependent on each other.
>>683640609
You sound like an entitled nigger who doesn't appreciate actually having a job with stable income. You're mad about something you don't understand so you resort to destruction.
The definition of a nigger.
hide raw eggs.. they will start to rot abd smell like a corpse
Butyric acid that makes your office smell like the last shithole dude fill it in a rubberglove etc. close it and open it in the ventilation
I do the same man. Here's my subtle list:
> Loosen the automatic door closers bit by bit so they constantly slam.
> Turn off the taps that supply water to the toilet cistern or basin.
> Steal tap handles from the kitchen sink.
> Rip the upholstery of your seat and then swap it with a matching chair. Do the whole floor.
> Order pizza but dont own up to it.
>>683644323
>siding with workers
COMMIE SCUM!!!
>>683644323
Not when low skilled laborers are easily replaceable.
>>683644386
not until their shells are cracked fucktard
>>683635833
You really think Capitalism is the problem?
Were you upset when Bernie "Don't be too successful now kids" Sanders got his ass kicked by a Hillary?
>>683644386
Better still, just hide some corpses and frame your boss when the auditors find them.
>>683642460
The way to encourage growth of small businesses is to get government the hell away from all of it.
throw him out the motherfucking window
Pour Visine in the milk.
Everyone will get instant diarrhea
Hack into his facebook and sign him up to a load of neo nazi pages, then invite all his contacts.
Swap all his black pens for blue pens.
Complain to complete strangers on a Japanese childrens cartoon forum, that'll show him!
I purposely spill oil from my lunch food onto the slippery kitchen tiles.
>>683642568
oh my god man you can afford to play video games and buy cars and fuck your girlfriend without condoms??? holy shit man what am i even doing trying to start a family when i could be doing this
i have two bachelors (cs+ai, business) and one MBA, 30 yo. I cant get get a job in my country for more than 700 euro pcm. I still dont fuck around with my office, caouse i dont hate the people there. Should i come to the states? how is the job market there.
Spread a rumour that he has HIV but doesn't want anyone to know about it.
>>683644603
How replaceable a person in a position is has nothing to do with how dependent everyone else is in the business on that position being done by someone. The fact that they're replaceable is the reason why they are so often left powerless to negotiate. That doesn't change the fact that they're doing a job which others, including the CEOs, depend on being done.
>>683645341
>700 euros
Where are you, Lithuania??
I'm unqualified, unskilled and paid minimum wage and take home on average €1800pm after tax, sounds like you could move ANYWHERE and earn more m8.
>>683641078
>implying
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B9_nsXgtD6k
>>683642460
There's nowhere in the world with a truly capitalist system. It's all crony capitalism at best.
>>683633593
> being in /b/
> "how mature"
how mature
>>683629088
This is how you really fuck a business.
>>683631159
Sounds like you are racial profiling an Indian.
>piss on the toilet paper.
>>683645629
It has a huge bearing on the nature of the relationship between the employer and employee.
The company is dependent on the position, not the person. How replaceable a person is denotes how much negotiating power they have.
>>683631159
Most of that shit only makes your coworkers lives horrible, and does NOTHING to your bosses.
So basically you want advice on how to be more of an asshole to the other poor slobs toiling alongside you.
>>683635815
Sauce please?
>>683644828
Except no government would allow unhindered operations of big business. That will in turn destroy all small business. And before you know it, Earth turns into WallE
>>683645682
lol no
i am in greece. So even worse at the moment.
I speak English and French. I am very depressed which doest look good on interviews though.
>>683645775
The black market. It's the only true capitalist market. And there is no problem with that at all, right?
>>683645294
Living a shitty life, that's what.
>>683646611
>Except no government would allow unhindered operations of big business.
It's cute that you think that.
>>683629088
chequed
>>683645750
> implying in going to watch your shitty YouTube link
>>683628599
you are the reason companies outsource. now go shoot yourself in the head.
>>683646611
Big businesses use government to destroy small businesses. It's not a matter of government allowing anything, the big businesses are calling the shots to keep potential competitors out.
>>683642816
And baby boomers are overrated. Welcome to the club.
>>683647263
this is also true.
>>683646534
No mate. Its affecting him the most. Because he has figured out that someone is doing it and his threatening emails are getting more and more angry. I hear him come in every monring and I always here the first thing he says to the front reception secretary and it is. So whats happended now. We've had two meetings already trying to "discuss" the things that have been happening. I'm just laughing inside. I think though he might be taking actions. He's agreed to give us fresh fruit.
>>683646401
>How replaceable a person is denotes how much negotiating power they have.
I agree to some extent, but often times they aren't even allowed to negotiate. Why prevent them from forcing negotiation by forming unions? If you grant that they have some, however little, negotiating power, why not let them negotiate?
>>683646981
You clearly missed something
>>683628599
Don't be a spiteful little bitch and confront them openly.
Then you can live like a true pinko, out in the freezing cold.
>>683647197
Why I am having a fucking ball ! I've got at least 20 more great ideas from this thread and I'm gunna use them all!
>>683628599
hide peanuts behind plants in corners, any little spot on the ground hidden from the eye and wait for the ant/mouseocapalypse
>>683647263
Which is why society is degrading. We need leaders that care more about improving the country than stuffing their pockets.
"Society only advances when men care more about progress than profit" - Tesla
>>683647426
When unions become involved you see people giving less of a shit because they're rewarded based on seniority, not value to the company. Several of my friends are now searching for jobs because their plant was destroyed by a union.
Quality diminished, contracts were lost, plant was shut down.
>>683648054
>once they show up call health department about unsanitary working conditions - place gets shut down
>>683647426
If anybody could walk in and learn how to do the job in a day why should they be able to negotiate? They need the company way more than the company needs them.
>>683648178
Not to mention government contributions from union leaders...
Put transparent tape on random printers electrical plugs so it isolates contact but isnt visible
Shuffle all markings on ethernet plugs on walls
Mix up different toners/inks in printers
Put batch scripts in random PCs which delete files from USB drives. Use task scheduler and VBS.
Replace fuses with lower-rated ones (8A instead 12 or 16 - power outages when too many PCs are on)
Replace empty CDs/DVDs with ones filled with porn/gore.
Unplug front panel USBs
Rotate all screens (if intel onboard gpus - google it)
Remove all batteries from mainboards
Leave tuna cans everywhere
Chop up block of styrofoam and put that mess in AC units - confetti from hell
Leave opened bottle of milk near heat source
>>683648149
You're never going to get those leaders. Positions of power will always draw corrupt people. What we need is to drastically limit the power of the system which those businesses take advantage of.
>>683648374
They need each other. No company no job. No employee no profit no company.
>>683648573
We need to elect altruists who care about their country more than money.
>>683631275
I have seen this pic in original thread,it was related to pyramids and editing
>>683648178
>they're rewarded based on seniority, not value to the company
That might be true sometimes but, if it is, that's a reason to change what unions are doing (rewarding seniority), not a reason not to have unions.
>>683648374
Relatively few jobs are such that literally anyone could walk in and learn to do it in a day. Regardless, the jobs that are like that are still necessary to the success of the business (supposing the owners/managers are smart and don't hire people for useless work). So, again, the particular individual isn't necessary but the position is. They are responsible for the overall success of the business in a way that the management isn't That's not to say management doesn't contribute to success. It just does so in a different way.
>>683648535
Fuck me.
Another quality bunch of mayhem!
Thanks man!
>>683628599
Quit your job and be the nigger that you so long to be
>>683649060
Berniecuck detected
>>683628599
ITT: Faggot complains about his job and acts like a child.
If you don't like the job, leave.
>>683628599
Fuck Trump.
Fuck the Man.
I'm with you OP. I've had enough of being my bosses bitch. I'm gunna start some espionage as well.
I've had a gutfull.
Its not much but its something.
>>683648583
Again, they need SOMEONE to fill the position, not any specific person. If there are plenty of someones able and willing to step in the second a position is empty, then the company does not need any one person, therefore that person has no negotiating power.
Companies should have to compete with each other for employees, that's how employees get better working conditions. Problem is there are so many barriers to entry that established companies can sit in relative comfort while underpaying employees who desperately need the job.
>>683635833
Yeah, it's obviously capitalism's fault you're such a failure. It certainly can't have anything to do with your shitty attitude.
fill pot of boiling water with dy ice in the office, lock windows and close doors. Fucker will die if enough of the gas is made, also his body wont detect it's not getting oxygen so he'll just pass out and die. or you can just put an egg underneath the cushion of his desk and put a note that says from (insert other co-worker you hate)
>>683649339
But I'm kicking it doing all this crazy shit man and what I'm doing is working mayhem on my bosses head.||Fuck him man fuck the system.
