feels thread
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
feels thread
bumping with some background music i found on /mu/
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Sgq8l1m9W0
>>681552237
Reporting in
>Currently sitting alone in a bar on my birthday because my dad didn't have time to join me and all my friends are off celebrateing with the girl who broke my heart (she happens to have the same birthday as me)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YTDG3Pa8Egw
all i ever wanted was 1 girl that loves me. ALL
>>681553273
You need better "friends," mate.
>>681553273
That's rough man
I'm back at a place where I was happy many years ago and it hurts to be here today and to see what has happened to me.
>>681553273
at least you know you felt love once
>I always hear about how great it is to love
>see everyone around me blossoming into relationships and breaking up, and loving again
>I haven't even had a crush since i was in elementary school
>I want to know what it's like
>Even if it just ends in a painful breakup I want to feel it once, to know what everyone is on about
>I feel hollow /b/
>>681553746
>>681553273
not trying to belittle your situation just realized i worded that a bit meanly
>>681553746
>I feel hollow /b/
You then already know how it feels.
At first you will be really fucking happy but as time goes on and you two drift apart you will feel less and less happy until there will be nothing else besides hollow emptiness. Welcome to love /b/ro
>>681552237
>I hate when none of my friends are online
>around others i'm the hilarious dark humor loving meme dealer
>but when I'm alone it all just drains away
Every friend and every girl tells me that i have a good sense of humor, that im funny, and im cool. But i never felt true love and im dying alone.
>>681554663
in the end we all die alone
>be me
>10
> playing wow
>grind till level ten with friend
>friend goes to sleep
>I run around by myself
>meet girl character
>we talk for a bit and decide to role play
>we role play as a couple
>horny as fuck and already seen porn I decide to have "her" blow me
>go below felendrens castle to get mah dick sucked
>"she" takes off her armour and kneels
>I take off my armour and get ready to enter commands
>out of nowhere some random nigga runs up
>girl stands up and they seem to be talking
>they jet outta there
>I spend the next hour following them
>the depression that followed after I lost them
>was as bad as when I grandfather died
> I considered fucking suicide
>MFW
>>681553456
Nah there good guy/gals, I can't expect them to break up there friendship with her because of our history, they just want a good time none of this relationship bullcrap
>>681554270
in a way that's a little comforting, at this point I've kind of accepted that love isn't going to be a part of my life
I've tried to counter this with my close circle of friends but I'm >>681554523
Am I just a failed organism? Was I born broken?
I have no friends. I'm 24 and I have the independence of a nine year old and get the respect of one. My only human contact 90% of the time is my father, and he's rude and kind of controlling about half the time. We had a fight a couple days ago after he said something pretty rude and I snapped because I'm so sick of it; we made up, but I'm still angry with him, because he seems to have this attitude that he can talk to me like I'm a nine year old bitch. He was "embarrassed" that I fucking stood up to him. I want to punch him in the face.
>>681555274
We're not born broken, we get broken by our experiences. I know how you feel though. As soon as I have no friends around me I have nothing to keep me from falling back into crippling selfhate and depression. As soon as I am alone everything feels so heavy. And I have no idea if we are failed organisms. I just want something totally unrealistic, called love.
>>681555512
once your father will be gone what you'r going to do ?
>>681555806
Anon, I also have been suffering awfully lately. It seemingly came out of nowhere, but I resent myself for everything I've done. I hate myself, I hate the expectations I feel, the pressure. I'm part of a loving family, but I can't get over my mistakes. I wouldn't ever want them finding out, I am sickened by myself.
>>681555940
>>681556432
I know how you feel. I have a loving, caring family but I can't get over the past and how I fucked up and got fucked up.
>>681556728
What burden do you carry anon?
My burden is all on myself, I've never hurt anybody though.
>>681554966
Wut
>>681556643
>>681555103
He didn't say they were assholes, he just said you need new ones. It's your birfday. I Love You.
>>681552237
Damn...
>>681556957
I got fucked up by school. Sounds really dumb but I have been "diagnosed" with a very high IQ and people always told me and still tell me how smart I am bla bla bla and so literally everyone had very high expectations that I just couldn't meet at the time. Then teachers started to literally fuck with my grades and just give me shit grades because they don't like me. Also I've been bullied for a few years and if that wasn't enough my doctors found some form of cancer near my spine that had to be removed but it didn't work out as it should have. It's all a really long story. The end of it is that I am left with crippling low self esteem mixed with perfectionism and horrible depression. All I have left right now are my friends and as soon as they are not around, either online or physical I have nothing to keep my mind occupied and then I fall back to this whole depression circlejerk..
And what's bringing you down right now?
Just remember nothing matters and have fun with your meaningless existence
>>681556795
Don't think it's real but if it is damn, that shit fucking scares me.
The only persons that I truly love are my parents and all my childhood, when they were late and I didn't have any news, I would imagine that they died in a car accident and I would become petrified with fear, not able to do anything until they came back home.
>>681557734
I have reached a point in my life where I can safely say I'm happy, and I've got a great job on the go, and I'm socialising, I have kickass friends, meet tons of girls and stuff, and I used to browse /b/ tons. I was pretty fucked up back then, depression and questioning life etc, a shut in. I used to fap to the wrong stuff, and I feel like a fucking idiot. However, my anxiety comes and goes, and I'm suffering now, no-one is responding to my messages, and all I dwell on is how much I'm hiding, my family would hate me if they knew what I used to do, and they are everything to me. The worst is that I used to be into the weirdest faps, and I can't justify it, all I can do is accept it's wrong, and that it isn't me now, but still, I find it hard. How can I justify such things, anon?
>>681558552
By weirdest faps, are u talking about CP ?
>>681558865
Nnnnooooooooo
no
no
no
no
>>681558893
No, not at all. I have never seen anything like that, thankfully. Pretty much everything in anime, except any scat or vore or anything of the type.
>>681558552
We all have our moments. And chances are most of us here have fapped to really fucked up shit. But as long as no one ever finds out everything will be fine. And how should they find out anyways? The only person that knows is you. I fapped to some really fucked shit and I have no clue why I did. We sometimes just start to think with our dicks instead of our brain.
>>681559258
Then I don't really see what you blame yourself for. CP is wrong because children are hurt in the process but any other fap material (except real rape/torture) is okay even if frowned upon by society.
We all have our fetiches man, no need to feel bad about it.
>>681560389
Thank you anons, I never hurt anyone by doing so but I have a niece now and I suppose the fact, even if shit like that is anime, just pisses me off.
>be me
>4 years ago, beginning of my freshman year of highschool
>go to a really stuck up town's school in Ohio
>everyone gossips and pass around rumors and all that jazz but no one actually goes out and says or does anything to anyone
>have had low self-esteem since elementary since not many friends
>people that were/are my friends constantly pick others over me when it really comes down to it
>have only had 2 serious relationships and even then they were desperate BVB whores with no standards and lived out of state
>have been rejected more times than I can count on my fingers
>hear every now and then from one of my close-ish friends that someone thinks I'm a fag or I'm a loser or I'm never gonna amount to anything
>low self-esteem and observation of popular kids in elementary school and onwards had caused me to become extremely autistic
>started to become less autistic at this point but the damage has been done
>my actions to try and become popular made me the biggest loser in the school, I think anyway
>convince myself that I'm not so bad looking with my unibrow, neckbeard, long hair, and pizza face
>work up the nerve to ask out this girl I know in my band class
>she says yes
>on the day of the set date she messages me
>she says she's sorry but she doesn't really wanna date anyone, and that she doesn't really find me to be the datable type
>my parents think I'm an absolute loser as well
>give up on everything after this, she was the only person left I would've wanted to try to get to know
I know that highschoolers only date because they wanna fuck eachother, but I've never experienced anything close to having someone to relate to and love other than my mother. The scary thing is that I think I know what people think, but I can never know. What if all this time I was just being paranoid and have been a depressed little shit for nothing? That's why I just stopped trying altogether.
>>681552237
>24 years old
>no friends
>drinking problem
>drug problem(mostly weed,speed & x)
>awake for over 2 days
>social anxiety
>nothing is fun anymore
I don't know what to feel.
T
>>681560883
I believe in you
Personal favorite feelspasta, for full feels play "No Surprises" by Radiohead
>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u5CVsCnxyXg
>>681560749
Continuing off of this.
The big factor to my never socializing is that, ever since I started acting like a complete retard, people quickly started thinking I was overreacting to everything. I noticed and EXTREMELY socially awkward guy do the same thing, begging for attention. Because of that, I don't talk or express things to anyone except my close friends anymore, because I feel like none of my emotions are real anymore, just fabricated in my sub-conscious to grab people's attention. I don't even think I feel any real emotions anymore.
What am I supposed to do?
>>681552237
http://youtu.be/ErmZRsCIUsE
This
>>681561804
https://soundcloud.com/axelthesleff/theres-a-night-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel
>>681560855
36, 3, 4.2, 5 yesterday, 6 7!
At least you got dubs!
You aren't broken.
You just lost the light.
You are now in a place where you think all there is left is a dark abyss, waiting to suck you in.
You are so wrong.
You are a strong person.
You can get out.
You made it this far.
You have to push further.
You have to draw strength from the pain.
You will want to collapse most days.
You must power through.
You can't let the doubt in, not even once.
You can do it.
You.
Will.
Make it.
>>681563458
I needed that anon, thank you seriously.
>>681561872
FUCK OTHERS
Seriously, fuck them. If they make you suffer and feel bad about yourself, just stop giving a shit about what they think and do. If no girl wants to date you, then fine, don't date girls. If you can't be the perfect popular guy that you parents wanted you to be, that's okay, fuck them too for pressuring you.
You need to start focussing on you and only you, do something of your time that doesn't involve others and fucking enjoy it. If you have real friends that make you feel good (I'm not talking about those fake friends that you frequent to seem like you fit in but you actually don't like and they don't like you either), try to be a good friend to them. If your parents love you and you love them back, tr to be a good son to them. Show kindness and compassion the ones that love you and fuck every other person in the universe.
I've been following those few rules since I'm a teenager and I always managed to get by quite happily despite the fact I'm a fucking weirdo and that most people would hate me if they really knew me.
>tfw 80k student loans at 11%
Strizz-essful
>>681563458
Thank you, /b/ro. And the rest of you guys. If I didn't have someone to talk to, i wouldn't be here. You guys are my family.
Thank you for giving me purpose, if only for a while.
I hope you're alright.
>>681563823
Who is the real you, anon?
>>681563967
USA fucking suck man, I feel for u.
Here in in France I'm getting one of the best enginnering degrees of the country and I'm getting paid for it.
To any broken heart or lonely /b/ro who needs to get something out of their chest, or even just talk a while, add me on kik.
Thatanoncalled.j
>>681563823
That's the thing. I know my parents love me, my mother probably more than my father, but they love me nonetheless. I know they think I'm a total failure regardless. That's what I'm so scared of. The fact that, considering how things are going, I'm never going to make anyone proud, not even my own flesh and blood. Not even myself. I've never been able to motivate myself to do well because of the though that it won't matter in the end. It's a self fulfilling prophecy that I can't help myself out of. I just want to be like everyone else and fit in and be happy like everyone else. I don't want to sit here every day on a site where everyone has seen child porn at least once. I want to be who I am without being who I was, but now I'm afraid it's too late.
>>681564337
I'm a lazy/ambitious/arrogant/introverted prick that jerk off to incest porn and is filled with anger towards others because they get to enjoy things that I can't no matter how hard I try.
>>681564925
If you aren't happy, you're gonna have to go and seize whatever makes you happy.
Stop acting, accept that you aren't happy, figure out why, and fix it.
This world isn't going to be handed to you on a silver platter.
>>681565332
Me too, anon, me too.
>>681564343
It's not that bad, but looking at those numbers is just scary. At least the job market is good.
>>681565451
>>681560749
>>681561872
>>681565174
add this onto the list
>>681565499
This site is great because there is a lot of us.
>got a job
>met the girl of my dreams
>like, seriously
>she thinks i have no interest in her
>we're both now quitting and im about to lose contact forever
>the only other people im vaguely this close to live on the other side of the globe
>its going to take me fucking forever to find a new job, and in that time im going to turnn into even more of a recluse than i already am
Waiting to lose my virginity for forever, last weekend, I had the easiest chance possible.
It's probably the most beta thing I've done, I had to lie and tell my mom I fucked this girl.
It's long, although it is goddamn beautiful.
>>681558064
This is more absurdism than nihilism IMO.
>>681565451
As someone who's almost out of his teenage years, this fucks me up. I've always been that one guy, you know who. The one who just sat in the back in the classroom, who no one ever talked to. Even in high school, my circle of friends was pretty small. I never really got the chance to find a girl who was really into me...
Fucking hell, /b/. I'm starting to realise that it only gets worse from here... I need a hug.
>>681565451
Holy fuck that describes exactly my life.
Each one of my teenage years I said to myself: "this year, I'm going to get a girlfriend and have the greatest times of my life" but it never came.
I'm 20 now and I know that I have failed, and that there is no turning back.
>>681566431
You didn't miss much. Teenage love is fucking retarded. Look forward to the good stuff. :)
>>681566534
Thank you, fellow anon
>>>/r9k/28173196
>>681565174
I feel for you anon, and hope it will get better. It was nice talking to you, even about subjects so depressing.
>>681566983
NP anon
>>681565174
I feel you anon. I just admitted to my own mother today that I've been having thoughts of suicide and need serious help.
I'm in the worst place I've been in a long time and have been completely delusionally procrastinating, thinking that the next day will be different and that I'll somehow be motivated.
I admitted everything I've been lying about for months to keep them from not being disappointed. It's almost like I try to put off my anxiety and depression and convince myself that I'll get everything figured out and not to think about that stuff. But all that has done is lead to my worst breakdown ever, and now i'm in a position that I never want to be in ever again. I just feel like a burden that doesn't deserve the love and understanding that I get from my family.
I'm leaving 4chan. I'm leaving and cutting myself off forever. I can't keep doing shit like this. I need to take initiative for once in my worthless life so I don't make even more mistakes than I already have. I'm gonna make a thread soon as a namefag. Keep me out of this place, /b/ros. I'm counting on you.
Thanks for all the laughs and the feels and the porn. It's been a wild ride.
I'm getting off Mr. /B/ones' Wild Ride.
Broke up with my ex about a month ago, worst decision I have ever made. She's with someone else now who I thought was my friend and seems happy. All I think about is how terrible I am and how I won't have anyone again
>>681567469
Good luck anon.
I wish you the best.
>>681567305
see
>>681567469
Join me man. It'll help.
TFW when you do bad in college, get stressed over it and do even worse, mother calls once a week to see if my GPA is getting better, then hungs up after a sigh.
so lonely /b/ros.. at least i have you guys
>>681567483
If you managed to get a good girl, you are more than likely to find others anon, feel for the ones who never got to experience what you had with her in their life.
>>681553273
I don't care if it's not true.
Enjoying this drink with you.
can I have a hug please?
>>681567184
Yeah, I needed that too. I had a fucking nuke dropped on me yesterday. Long story short, my best friend's gf, one of my emotional supports and vents, is really into me and it's apparently tearing apart their relationship and i feel like shit because of it.
>B me
>B in love
>B in a relationship for a year and a half
>go to a funeral out of state for a week
>get a message 2 days before I end up going home
>"anon... I fucked up, I got really high and took a couple pills... Your friend and I... We had sex anon... I'm sorry"
>start to slide into even more of a depression than I was when I found out my uncle died
Here I am 2 weeks later... I've been drinking since I got home 2 weeks ago, I know it's just pushing my sadness till I'm sober but I just can't cope with being sober yet.
I know a year and a half doesn't seem long to a lot of you, but it doesn't change the fact that I am tore up over this. I was just about to get an apartment for us... I had saved up over 3,000$ just for her, I got over my pill addiction by going to rehab for her, and a lot of other shit... I'm drunk as hell right now but I decided to share what little I had with you guys.
>inb4 get over it faggot
>inb4 a year isn't shit
>>681567915
I'm going to attempt to ask a girl out who I've talked to a bit and seems pretty cool so hopefully that will be the start of shit getting better. Thanks anon
>>681553746
The hollow feeling sucks, but it's only there because your comparing yourself to people around you. That hollow feeling is a result of you placing to much emphasis in being a relationship but what you haven't realized is that it doesn't matter. Society likes to make us think that everyone needs to have a partner but that's simply just not true. You are perfect just the way you are anon and don't let anyone make you think that you need someone else to love you to validate your existence. All you need is to love and accept yourself and that's all you'll ever need.
>>681568047
Wish I could share a drink with you, dude. I could use quite a few right now.
>>681567827
Damn man that's brutal. I know the unending cycle of worse and worse grades and motivation towards them, it's tough. Do you have any other family you can reach out to that might just be willing to listen? What country are you from? Hows your healthcare system?
>>681560639
I will be alright, and will move forward, a real man learns from his mistakes, and I won't fall back.
>>681568047
I can't imagine what you a going through because I never had a girlfriend but I feel for you anon and hope you get better.
>>681561872
I just think you need to get the fuck out of high school.
That place was cancer.
>>681568156
Good luck anon
not really sad. like at all,
>be me
>enjoy drugs. they're delicious
>join the army for some reason
>want to do drugs
>can't
wat do
>>681568218
Amen
I got one
> placed on tard bus
> Smart aspie
> I'm the only non idiot
I don't have a story but guys feel good and hug your pet, today i had to literally asphyxiate my own dog because i can't even afford more humane methods
>>681568344
I'm from Argentina man. My family is pretty much torn apart, we literally don't speak to each other. My mom just sends me money once amonth and pays my rent. I haven't been in her house for 2 years (i'm 20 now). I've got top-notch private healthcare, why?
>>681552237
>I don't have a story but guys feel good and hug your pet, today i had to literally asphyxiate my own dog because i can't even afford more humane methods
Studies show dog hugging is bad
>>681561872
Your feeling are totally real and there is nothing wrong with seeking attention.
>>681568222
Nice trips bro, I would buy you one to share with me if you were here.. The saddest part is that I realized my friends chose her over me after we broke up. I've been alone since I got back home.. >>681568413
Thank you m8, girls will be the life and death of you. They can build you up just to push you down and break you like you were made out of the shittiest Lego's you could find.
yus
>>681568047
A year and a half is plenty long.
I take it you did not try to save the relationship...
I know that feel, bro. But I continued my relationship when this almost identical situation happened in my life, and it bit me in the ass later. Hardcore.
>>681555512
By stood up to him you mean still sucking on his financial tit like a manbaby, right?
>>681553273
im raising a drink for you /b/rother
>>681568912
I'm sorry to here that anon.
Does your health care cover mental health? Have you tried seeing someone to talk to about this? I'm in the process of doing that right now and I seriously recommend it, as cliche as it sounds.
>>681568643
This is beautiful and really sums up my 4chan experience, thanks anon !
>>681554966
that's legit pathetic. More like this
>>681568778
I'm sorry to hear, Anon. Was your dog sick?
>>681558865
Fuck off
>>681554966
kek'd lost
>>681569188
>>681567996 this anon here
God damn it, anon, I just stopped crying. God damn it, I'm so sick of this fucking hellhole known as life, and I just want out. I'm done, and the only reason I haven't just killed myself is because I don't have a gun.
>>681568643
Thanks for this anon. It's great to cry and feel good at the same time, I needed that.
>>681569474
this isn't a ylyl thread you heartless monster
>>681569242
unfortunately no medical procedure can make me smarter, i'm just a good for nothing cunt trying to chew my way through engineering
>>681569028
She tried to get me to "work things out" but I told her no... I said "there is no excuse for what you did, no matter how fucked up you got you could have still said no" I am glad I did that because she got together with my ex friend that she slept with the day after I told her that... It saved me from waiting my time prolonging the inevitable.
>25 and right on track /bros/
>>681565451
Homeschooled. Tried to go to prostitute... dick couldn't even get hard. I am 18 and I can't do shit all. I'm on the spectrum and don't get out much. Talk to a few people I go to the gym with. Everything I say to them feels forced and unnatural, everything confuses me... I get the cues right so nobody notices... but I notice and It affects me. I'm so lonely. I have been robbed of the skills normal people have. I may be autistic but I still want to connect with people. The only friends I have are in fiction. My exams are next week and I haven't done much work and I know that if I don't pull my weight I will fall deeper into the abyss that I call my life. It's like that quote Nitsche said:
"And if thou gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will also gaze into thee".
>>681568643
It always gets me at, "close minded niggers."
>>681570072
I was looking for this the other day
>23 and on track
>>681561130
fag
>>681553655
fuck dude.
i did the same about a year ago. Went to a special place i was the happiest in my entire life. My old neighborhood where we had about 20 amazing friends gather for manhunt & fireworks all evening and night.
When i got there i literally burst into tears in the middle of the road.
Amazing time. about 8 years ago.
>>681569337
Yeah he was really sick, tried to keep him alive feeding him with a syringe, he got worse today and started to bleed from his anus and mouth, the pet organizations suck at my city so i couldn't do more.
Rest in peace dog i love you and i'm just so sorry, i can't forgive myself for being a fucking NEET, i should have done more, if i had money he would be alive
>>681570043
Good job. Seriously.
I know its a shitty, horrible feeling, but it would've done no good to stay with a person capable of doing something like that.
Once a cheater, always a god damned cheater.
>>681553273
Maybe you shouldn't have fallen in love with your twin sister, dude.
>>681570557
Thank you bro, now I have to try my hardest to try to move on. I have made plans to move in with some family on the other side of the country (I'm in Alabama, they are in Minnesota) maybe my life will start looking up when I get up there.
I was one year away from graduating college when I attempted suicide.
>If I go back it'll be hell + student loans (had FAFSA and lost it because I'm a dumb fucking twat)
>if I don't I'll always see myself as a failure
hold me, anon
A lot of you guys will talk about how you've fallen in love and lost said love, either by ruining the relationship, death, or some other circumstance.
You know that phrase, "it's better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all"?
I'm that phrase.
I have lusted, trust me. I've been reluctant to go up in front of the class because sally-mick-jiggle-tits decided to where short-shorts that day. I've felt my heart pound out of my chest whenever a girl gets too close to me, I've even had some girls admit they liked me and heard that others never told me how they felt.
However, love, honest love, is something that I have never felt. Not romance, not lust, but love. To be willing, with every fiber of your being, to sacrifice the rest of your life just for one other person. One person out the several billion on the planet that you decide is worth every second of your short life.
I have never felt that. It is an emotion so foreign to me I feel that I lack some humanity. I feel that I am less of a person. I feel that I will never know that emotion, even when others might feel it for me.
So, what are you supposed to take away from this? At least you know it. At least you've had it. I never will.
>remember to call me a faggot
>>681571796
try dating sites.
srsly tho try it out
>>681561804
Radiohead is god tier feels music. currently listening to Exit Music. > http://youtu.be/RByvzmmEFiQ
>>681572059
different anon
but those don't work
>tfw you messaged over 200 girls and got one reply
>>681571694
Yeah I just need a hug. Not from a relationship standpoint though, I just need someone to hold and cry with.
>>681571036
Good, definitely surround yourself with positives. You'll seriously feel better before you even know it.
There are plenty more wimmenz out there, bro. Enjoy your newfound freedom before you get into another relationship haha
>>681566701
Inbf4 neckbeard
Post picks annon
>>681568047
Stay clean my man
Don't let getting over this loss affect your next love
>>681552237
I have no penis. It was mauled in a car accident. I'm attached to a catheter constantly now.
>>681572286
that's mostly true... especially if you have high as fuck standards. kind of sucks, because the main thing you're selling about yourself on a dating website is your physical appearance.
i know a few people who have had success through dating sites. it takes a ton of patience
>>681572267
Just a tip that you've probably already heard before so fuck me, but listening to more cheerful music and taking some sad songs out of your playlist has been known to make a difference. Disregard me if you already know that and aren't devastatingly depressed like I am.
>>681572586
Anon.
Pretend I'm holding you.
>>681572723
Ok now what
>>681572586
There's like crazy surgery stories where they like use arm tissue to graft a dick, not saying you haven't looked into it but I'm sure there's hope for you bro
>>681572433
I'm never going back to pills, since I have been clean my conversational reasoning has been shit. I have a slight speech impediment (I studder sometimes) and I've had 2 seizures. I will smoke bud at times but for the moment I am sticking to drinking.
I want to just sink into bed and never move again
I came to my room after class
Sunk into bed. Woke up at 9:30 after going to sleep at 5:30.
I'm still tired
I'm always tired
I'm just floating through life now
I'm not sure if I want to live
>>681568762
Are you me?
>>681563918
It's a feels thread, not an edge thread
>>681572635
my standards aren't exactly high and I've been told I'm cute
>be me
>middle school years go bad, bullied and depression gets me
>sophomore year of high school
>finally find friends who like me for who i am and make me happy
>mfw theyre seniors
>last couple weeks of school left
>band concert is tomorrow
>not prepared for the sadness that will come
>realize theyre leaving
>might not see some of them again
>painful
theres not enough time
>>681555103
They're just after the sloppy seconds. If they weren't all horny/thirsty, they would be celebrating with YOU and not her.
but in all seriousness... I know where you're coming from
>>681573422
also I've been on there for over a year
>>681573067
Yea it's rough man
I've looked into it. It's out of my price range but I'm saving up.
>>681552237
Me and my friend keep bullshitting each other to stop each other from commiting suicide because both of our lives are clusterfucks
>>681572371
Thank you m80 I most definitely will enjoy my freedom before I move on, but I can't where I'm at because I came to the realization that for as big as a city I'm in alot of people are somehow or another associated with everyone. So Ive been in the shadows pretty much since I came back home from the funeral.
Alright you fucks listen up cause I'm gonna put this shit into perspective for you.
You guys have a sense of the world. You are grounded in it. You live in it. You can live in it.
Try this on for size: You've been thinking about life and the world, the universe for your whole life. You've been doing mental connections to see how deep the rabbit hole goes.
Then you do.
And when you do, suddenly everything, no matter if there's a god or not, a reason for being, it doesn't matter. Because you know what is fundamental now. You know what the world is. You kept digging and digging and digging, and you found the chest of gold. Congrat-fuck you-lations.
Now you're a god damn fucking robot, going through the motions. You do only what you feel others expect of you, you copy a routine day in and day out.
You're trying to forget the awful "wisdom" you've achieved about existence, and now you wish that you'd just been as simplistic and easy-minded as everyone else. You wish you could go back and tell yourself to just stop fucking thinking about it and live your god damn life.
Now you know that if there is a god, you know him. You understand him. You pity him.
The worst part? You can't tell anyone this, because it will rip apart their very soul like it did you.
>but that's just the opinion of a fucking loser, right?
>>681573313
I didn't take it like that. I think it just means that you have the ability to get yourself out of this if you push.
I'm not sad about this right now or anything, but it was the most traumatic thing in my life so far that happened fairly recently. Around 6 months ago.
backstory:
>dating high school sweet heart for a year, maybe two
>super awesome friends, connect really well
>going through a huge phase of trying ALL of the drugs with my best friend, a male
>blah blah blah, high school sweetheart fucks best friend in drunken/drugged stupor
>much bawwwing was had
>end up forgiving her and continuing the relatiomship
fast forward to 4+ years being together:
>tired of being broke as fuck all the time and living with friends/family
>decide to get married and join the military
>few months after our 1 year marriage anniversary, she wakes me up at 4 in the morning
>anon im having a panic attack
>confused as fuck because its 4 in the morning
>turns out she's been sleeping around and wants to leave
>ends up leaving the apartment without giving me any explanation whatsoever
>over the course of the next several weeks, she appears randomly to get her things... still not really providing any closure whatsoever
>mfw i joined the army to give her a better life
>mfw the army makes me give her $718 a month because the army is fucking retarded and oh god why did i do this
>>681572650
Listening to happy music just feels forced and disgusting, and silence is worse. Thank you, though. I do appreciate you caring enough to tell me.
>>681556728
Me too
>>681573596
Where you at? Long shot asking but if you an Ausfag in Newcastle/Hunter would be rad to meet up cause you seem like a bro
>>681573782
Dude.
Please just be lying.
>>681573973
Sorry, mate. Not even close. Freedomland is what I call home.
>>681571694
Maybe when i was 14.
>>681574266
Hahaha well you have my love and you can have my dick when I die if you want
>>681554523
Iktf my mans
>>681573492
lol ok then
try MORE dating sites?
meetup.com
the key is to get involved in events where people of similar interests will come together. makes it easier to have something to talk about.
>>681553273
I'm sorry /b/ro get a hooker for yourself and post it for all of us.
>>681558552
>How can I justify such things, anon?
Why is justification needed as opposed to acceptance? The past is just a story. It has no power over you. That which is past, has passed. Dwelling on what cannot be changed, and is mostly trifling, is silly.
>>681574266
>>681574486
>>681565907
GET HER NUMBER!
>>681574572
I used to be on multiple, I didn't get anywhere
I've been told I'm cute but they're probably lying
>>681574038
Not lying.
It hurt so badly when it happened. I couldn't understand it...
Giving her money doesn't hurt. Ending the relationship didn't even necessarily hurt.
What hurt was how cold it all was. The way one day everything felt completely normal and routine, and the next day she disappears and refused to really speak to me about anything. On the few occasions we would meet up to talk about reality, like starting divorce process, she had this look in her eye... one that I did not recognize. I literally did not know who she was anymore all of a sudden.
Its nuts.
>>681574486
Haha thanks mate. I'm signing off for tonight. Good luck with life.
we're all fucked
>>681574748
Kek
/thread
>>681567469
The traps will call you back, and you will return, because everyone loves traps.
Just one....more...trapfap...
>>681575032
Farewell and good luck to you ,your future, your family and your cow
I'm about to fail out of college while all my friends go to live together in student apartments. My parents refuse to house me over the summer, "You're an adult now anon"
so I don't know where I'm going to live once I'm kicked out of this damn dorm. I can't find a job either - all the summer jobs were taken already by other students. The semester ends in a few weeks. I don't even have a car to live out of if I can't find a place. I'm worried I'm about to be homeless and in debt. In addition to all that I've been depressed because I'm a fucking pedofag and I'm just getting over my first crush - my younger sister. I'm all kinds of fucked up /b/
>>681575013
To be quite honest I'm just a college sophomore (or junior, I'm 19 I don't fuckin' know), so I can't really think of anything to say.
With giving her money, the thing that sucks about that isn't the money but the fact that you're being forced to still be connected to her after she totally abandoned you.
And honestly I can't help but think that it's her fault for getting in a relationship she didn't want, but that's just me.
I know I might be a dick for saying this, but I hope you can get those papers figured out so you can just get her out of your life.
>>681575583
join the military.
>raised in abusive household
>dad jailed for domestic violence
>mother dies when im 9
>become child of the state
>in and out of foster care til 16
>most families abusive
>run away to try and better myself
>spend the next 6 years homeless/traveling
>meet other travelers with their issues, ride trains and play music together
>meet dream girl traveler
>feel happy for once
>travel around together for two of those years, its bliss
>in baltimore for a weekend
>get drunk with other travelers
>pass out
>wake up, girl is half naked, isnt waking up
>turns out she got really drunk, passed out, and another dude shot her up with heroin, raped her
>od
>other travelers kick his ass to a bloody pulp
>left him to rot
>be on my own now
>cant handle the depression
>decide to get shit together
>fly a sign for work
>lady picks me up, houses me and gets me on track to get my ged
>fucking do it for her
>pass, get shitty job
>save up, get shitty apartment
>still unhappy
thats my life so far. How do you give yourself purpose?
>>681575583
That sucks man. Do your parents know about you failing college yet? Have you looked into welfare?
>>681575583
How old are you? I'm almost 20 and my parents are still housing me because they know that I can't afford shit while doing college full time.
>>681569188
> you'll never be able to speak without feeling like you're bothering someone
Too fucking real
>>681575849
Exactly. Once a month its just a reminder of all that bullshit when I have to send her that money.
I don't totally blame her for being in this relationship, though. Its the whole high school sweetheart thing. We didn't know any better.
Would just be nice if she'd stop taking my money is all. I'm kind of broke as fuck here lmao
>>681575912
Nigga you fucking did all of that and you're depressed?
I have trouble getting out of bed in the morning.
You haven't got shit to worry about, you a good man.
>>681565451
fuck
>>681575583
Just remember anon, that basic income should be coming in (hopefully) a few years. So worst comes to worst you have that to fall back on.
>>681569188
I know this feel
>>681565451
fuck
>tfw 23 and no hope
>>681576058
20 year old shit here
>>681575921
Yeah they know - they don't care though. They're northern US attitude is that after I turned 18 in not their responsibility any more. I haven't looked into welfare, I don't even know where to start with that. I might just join the military like another anon said.
>>681569151
>>681567921
thanks /b/ros love you guys
>>681570600
same day but different year my friend, she was truly something special though
I have a girlfriend but I kissed my childhood best friend last night. My girlfriend is so vanilla, she won't even wear a thong. She's boring, clingy, and average.
But then this girl.
Beautiful from hesd to toe, perfect proportions working on a PHD.
I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I'm numb. In love. Bored. Fuck.
>>681575912
constant goals.
at least now you have reliable shelter. whats next? finding someone to share it with?
>>681572586
how to you cum? does anal still work? I never tried but if I had lost my dick i certainly would
What songs help you guys stay alive?
Here's mine
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ytxAoXpo42Y
>>681576331
its just I feel like I have no options ya know? My few friends are all traveling, I know nobody, I love nobody, my job is draining, and I just dont know what to do about it. Im not readt for romance, I never built the social skills to make friends, I have no common interests with people, and I dont know what to live my life for. Its just a rut I cant get out of.
>>681576569
Did they at least teach you shit?
Or did they expect you to some-fucking-how do that shit on your own?
You don't seem to be in the wrong here, just ultimately screwed.
I would look into city work, part time. They're always hiring.
>>681576569
give the military serious thought. its such a massive pain in the ass, but you get a stable life from it.
and unless you're some macho guy with something to prove... just join the air force and make life easy for yourself.
>>681576648
Im not sure. I dont think im ready for another relationship, and My last one made sense since we were in a similar situation. We were fucking ride or die man. Its not the same anymore
>>681576922
It's simple. You need to change tour life up. Move to a place where a lot of people share your interests. Meditate. Try going new places, even by yourself.
Think different
>>681577145
I appreciate the advice, anon
feels good to let this shit out, even on a shitpost forum
>>681576922
This was me: >>681573698
(sorry for rage post)
But part of that realization I had was to look at everything from a perspective of what is really there. No social obligations, no systems, no emotional attachments to anything. Just what the world physically is by itself.
I understood what was really going on in our world, but I've become so disillusioned from the human condition that it's torture to act on it.
You still have that. You're still human. Think about how much freedom you really have, and go.
