ITT: we pretend we are all surviving WW3 in the same bunker.
>>679892961
I clogged the toilet.
>>679893099
Fuck! the shitters clogged!
>>679893099
fuck you dad
>>679892961
Ok, who farted cause it fucking stinks.
Shit! The water's overflowing!
>>679892961
Let me prime this grenade
>>679893336
SWEET BUTTERY JESUS THERE'S A TURD BEHIND THE RADIATOR
>>679892961
Why is the freezer full of jizz-cicles?
Anyome still have Hillary's nudes before her election?
>>679894127
All protein must be recycled.
>>679894354
I didn't need to know those existed.
Hey guys, I brought a lot of condoms and a couple of firecrackers. What should we do?
>>679894492
What do you think cause WWIII, scrot?
i'm farting huehuehue
You guys I'm the 3rd gender what happens to me?
>>679894708
The Jews
>>679894527
Fill the condom with water, light firecracker, insert firecracker into condom, tie condom, and run. We can blame Sam.
there are probably more male than female in the bunker...
so..
let's rape all females?
>>679892961
lol... i've actually been in there when i was at dachau... its actually not a bunker, its a prison. its where the guy that tried to assassinate hitler in 1939 had to sit as prisoner for the entire war, only to be killed by SS guards 2 days before the camp was liberated.
Ok, who the fuck raped my parrot?
>>679894922
>jacking off in corner
>when everyones asleep i eat all the food
>just on you while youre sleeping
>see what else i can do to make you kill me because i dont want to live through this
>>679895076
>>679895164
>the fact you thin im asleep when you do that
>>679894922
hey look guy we keep telling you, sure we could but we will be stuck here for awhile... like we all eat breakfast together. how awkward would that be dipshit.
lets just all continue playing this fucking board game and try not to rape these ladies
I just pissed the bed.
>>679894784
We are going to push you out of the bunker for the greater good. The only way you can stay is if you agree to being the sex slave.
>>679894821
Good idea. Throw one of them in Mike's sleeping bag. I hate that fucking faggot.
Does anyone remember where my shaver is?
>>679895619
Sorry anon it's in my room. I had to shave my taint
>>679895509
Fuck sake. Not again you dirty bastard.
Hey guys, I managed to salvage one file from the internet before it went down. Sure gave me a chuckle!
>>679894922
Stay away from the women mother fucker, you touch a woman I'll make sure its the last day you spend in this bunker.
>>679895751
I THOUGHT IT HAD DIED
>>679895726
Dude really! We only get 2 blades for the whole year!
Guys, I forgot which barrel was the shit barrel and which was the ground beef barrel.
I guess I should've told you before dinner.
Does anybody know where my penis extender is?
>>679896061
i thought the the ground beef was in boxes, not barrels?
Who all volunteered for the supply run tomorrow? Craziest supply run stories? It's my first go, a bit nervous.
>>679896061
ground beef is the only thing I had left to live for...
>>679896197
ask that dumbass that shaved his taint with my last razor blade/
GUYS! I FOUND THE COCAINE I HID BEFORE THE BOMBS HIT!
>>679896229
I lost my left testicle last time I went on a supply run. Some psycho with a weed-eater jumped us. I don't wanna talk about it...
Hello? Anybody in there? You can come on out now, it's perfectly safe.
>>679896222
Isn't a barrel just a round box?
>>679896229
I guess I'm going now too. Why am I the only person who thinks to grab the razor blades?
Who stole all the memes?
Why is their a shit in my shoe!
>>679896514
guys, the skin walkers are back!
dubs and i blew up the bunker on accident
>>679893757
kek
someone come find me. I've got lost in the dark
Nobody better have ate the last three musketeers bar! I swear to God I'll feed you to the rad roaches if I find out you did!
>>679896935
Sorry, you're a lost cause at this point.
>>679896974
I ate one, the other 2 were shoved up your ass while you were asleep
guys, anyone remembered how long we've been here?
>>679896974
Someone ate the last three musketeers?!?!
DAVE, IT WAS YOU WASN'T IT?!?!?
>>679897267
about 10 minutes
Hey y'all, I'm goin' on a supply run to git more food!
>>679897489
i guess im going to miss the new tosh.0 special tonight since we dont have a tv?
>>679897489
grab a tv while youre out?
>>679897489
Nah, you've got enough blubber on you to last us through the winter. Don't worry about it.
>>679894821
Absolutely fucking not. I aint taking the blame for this shit, you fuck nut.
>>679896458
Hero
>>679892961
Man, the muslims finally went and did it
>>679892961
can i bring my girlfriend in the bunker?
she'd push my load out her axe-wound and make music with the queefs
u ever heard cum queefs make sick beats bruh?
this was her favorite song to queef to me:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EVI4Knz24CQ
So me and anon just learned we're gay, you won't treat us differently will you? Also, boipucci conference in half hour.
STOP CUMMING IN THE WATER SUPPLY YOU FAGS
w-wait, how are we going to repopulate earth if there are no girls here?
fuck this shit im going in a blaze of glory!
GOD BLESS EMPEROR TRU-
>>679897962
I'll cum wherever I wanna cum!
>>679895751
aw fuck you, my sides
>>679897931
Anybody else thinking what I'm thinking?
Do any of you remember how was the sunlight ? I remember playing with my son, hehe, we used to run arround the park in circles and i screamed to him "i'm going to catch you!".
But he got shot in the leg and got an infection, do to the lack of medical supplies in the bunker, we lost him, there was no medic arround, we couldn't even cut off his fucking leg, he died....he died..........He died............i...........feel.............like..............i...................can't.................continue, i just want this to end
>>679898171
MP...
I'm the asshole who finished your sentence after you died and discarded the fact that you are now dead.
PARROT POSTER
>>679898324
Let's eat this guy
guys i'm locked outside. please let me in. promise i won't give everyone radiation poisoning!
There is no fucking food left and bombs still dropping.... this is survival man!!!
>>679898455
DO IT, I GIVE A FUCK, ALL THAT I HAD IS NOW GONE, DO IT, JUST FUCKING DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>679898354
i would reply to your comment
but i am dead
>>679898324
Here, I made you breakfast to ease your pain.
I'm not even mad about all of these beautiful birds showing up in the bunker.
>>679898874
Me neither. They'll probably taste great with some chili.
>>679898990
>>679898842
>>679898790
>>679898709
>>679898618
>>679898545
>>679898467
at least it's not a teeth dump
>>679898874
we really shouldn't eat that beef, we're hallucinating
Parrot poster away!
>>679899168
finally, some pussy
>>679899281
is this the way out?
>>679899281
GUYS RUN FOR IT BEFORE IT CLOSES!
>>679899281
>And like the majestic parrot, the parrot poster left...
>>679899384
if it's the way for us to get out, it's also the way for radiation to get in! SEAL THE DOORS!!! BREACH
I only had a little weed left so I lit it and stashed it in the vents. Sharing is caring, right?
>>679899384
>>679899500
>>679899555
>>679899580
oh, hello again, guys
Okay which one of you bitches are gonna 1v1 me in Super Smash Bros?
Anybody wanna play this with me?
>>679899707
thanks bruh... i forgot what were doing
Guys, I'm making dinner!
WHO THE FUCK TOOK MY GODAMN DAFT PUNK ALBUM IF IM GONNA DIE IN THIS BUNKER IM GONNA DO IT LISTENING TO ROBOT ROCK
>>679900688
ffs cant you see that you are burning the food??
>>679900817
Ask Sam, he's always taking my stuff.
I shit my pants and we're all locked in a tighly packed room.
>>679900926
Anon, I think it's time that I told you...
I'm blind...when the bomb dropped, I passed out with my eyes open. The heat from the bomb scorched them out of their sockets.
Also you're adopted. Your biological mother was a waffle.
Sorry guys I accidentally destroyed the ventilation system.
No problem right?
Who the fuck brought their waifu body pillow?
Sam dont be a dirty jew aND GIVE ME MY FUCKING SHIT
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RN0ixdOsrY0
Guys, why is there a hole leading into darkness behind the toilet?I think something is in there.
Back from supply run, I grabbed some snacks.
>>679901798
Nope, nothing there. You can trust me, I'm from the CIA.
>>679901568
No, it's mine now.
I'm going up to get some snacks. Do you guys want anything?
>>679902094
Already got them.
>>679901939
>>679901939
let the blind guy at the stove cook them up for us
Guys? can I come in?
do you have some space left? Guys?
Guys it's cold outside?
Guys?
>>679892961
Hey guis open the door. It's me, Goku
>>679902094
I will go with you, can I wear my mask?
Hey guys, I've been thinking about writing my own guitar songs, but I think I just want to play Wonderwall for the thousandth time. What do you guys think?
>>679892961
hey guys i got some good kush find me in the kitchen if ya want anny
>>679902434
I can cook that for you. I might be blind, but I'm not retarded.
>>679902390
>Stuck in bunker
>Have to listen to oasis
Guys, we now know what hell is!
>>679902277
that depends, which on are you
>>679894354
i do but if you look at them you go blind
TL: DR. I have the shits from eating bad chocolate pudding squares. Where's the shitter?
>>679902277
guys I got dubs! can i get in now?
Guys?
>>679900817 I found my album cooked in a pancake....somebody ate half of the pancake.....fookin why?!?! The food situtation isnt that bad....is it?
>>679902277
Keep out
Also checked
>>679902598
Pavillion
Let's just get one thing straight, right from the beginning.
NONE of you had better lay a finger on my 14 year old daughter. If I find out that any of you have stolen her virginity, I'll fucking kill you.
This is you only warning.
All girls pair up with one guy for reproductive purposes... Oh wait.
>>679895751
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE IT WAS SUPPOSED TO DIE FOR A REASON
>>679902700
No
Also checked
Life on the surface isn't all bad, disregarding the homocidal Raiders, the homocidal soldiers, and the homocidal mutated bugs it's a pretty nice place up here. You should all open your door and come out here to this completely safe meeting that is definitely not a trap.
We have women here too.
>>679902838
that's good enough for me
>>679896514
OH GOD ITS A JEW
>>679902944
DIBS
>>679902992
Guys, the have grils! I'm gonna go take a look...
War never changes
why didn't anyone bring women?
i'm gonna need the shortest and skinniest guy here
>>679895448
so we chain 'em up, feed 'em outta bowls. it's not rocket science.
>>679902944
So, are you going to cut my throat now?
She was great.
>>679895847
>whiteknight detected.
Fine. More rapery for me.
>>679895847
im kicking you out for being such a faggot
now get >>>/out/
>>679895751
THATS WHAT CAUSED THE WAR
Hey everyone!
Guys i just found a paper on the ground listing the ways on how to make some meth. Anybody have ingredients?
>>679902277
>>679902700
c'mon, he got dubdubs AND dubs. seems legit.
>>679903883
always
let's cook
I'm horny
>>679903966
>he
>magically knows that those two posts were made by the same person without IDs.
>>679903883
>Checks over list
In the back.
>>679904007
Yo, man.
We need to set up an operation to supply everyone with meth.
>>679898211
no fuck off
Hey everyone I'm your Nigerian prince cousin give me 1k and ill give u one mil
>>679904119
nah that's actually me I can screenshot but it's too much work, plus he also got dubs! believe him
>>679903966
also check'd
>>679904007 >>679904126
Im thinking blue biker meth what about you?
>>679904126
no police to stop us, he will just take the boiler room for our operations and sell it from there
>>679903966
dude, just open the back door when noones looking, promise i wont tell
>>679904340
Five off nigger were full
>>679903966
DUBS HAVE SPOKEN! LOWER THE GATE!
>>679904445
that's what people have come to expect from meth, so ofcourse
>>679892961
you guys mind if I head out for a smoke?
>>679904459
Boiler room is to damp.
How about the infirmary?
>>679904556
Dammit !
If I had trips you'd have had to let me in!
>>679904740
let me grab my coat, i'll join ya
>>679903210
How long has it been since the day Jim went to surface?
>>679904695
>>679904126
>>679904007
LETS START COOKING MOTHERFUCKERS
>>679904119
>implying trolls are that thorough
what do you think this is, 2006?
>>679904740
Just smoke your weed in here
>>679904772
can't, the gasses are hazardous, how about the generator room?
>>679902992
>>679903210
This guy must be swimming in pussy by now, I'm gonna go up and see if I can get some
>>679892961
this is a nice bunker
>>679905022
Electricity might create a spark, we don't want to go up.
what about the spare kitchen?
>>679894791
He's right you know
>>679892961
Hey, you guys wanna do some anime?
Hope no one minds but I replaced the bunkers soundtrack with nickelback set to a permanent loop.
You're welcome
Guys, Karen got weed, come join
>>679897397
best response after reading this far
>>679905251
sounds good
just turn on the range hoods to remove the fumes
it's the perfect spot really
>>679905526
Lets do this then
>>679905390
Sure but just so you know...... she's a trap.
Just a warning for when she tries to seduce you.
Dig in
>>679902661
it's blocked dude
randy's dead guys
And people say /b is dead
>>679905526
Okay, we have psuedoephedrin, Hcl, and ether.
But someone stole the fucking lye.
>>679905808
...Fuck
any sissy ass lookin for a good thrashin?
>>679904902
about 15 minutes
>>679905930
Dinner is served.
I got some pizza guys
>>679906037
maybe check the utility room
>>679906037
Probably fucking sam, well if he doesnt give in lets eat him
Doesn't look too good above ground...
>>679898146
There is but very few, unless there traps haven't checked yet
>>679895751
HOLY FUCK YOU ACTUALLY MADE THE BANANA FUNNY
+1 INTERNET FOR YOU ANON, WELL DONE
>>679895751
MY FUCKING SIDES
>>679906040
I know, Stacy's not. But if you dittle her she'll never stop bothering you.
>>679906269
We have some.
Also salt peter, and sugar.... smoke bomb the bathroom?
>>679906327
well this is detroit, looks pretty normal, just less niggers now
>>679892961
Hey guys, finally dug my way in. You wouldn't believe the amount of sunshine there is now that the pollution isn't clogging the air.
>>679895751
Is this when we decide that this anon gets to be eaten first when all the food runs out?
>>679906037
You mean the soap Edward's using right now?
>>679906643
WOW
>>679906693
Great, now our meth is going to be full of crustaceans.
>>679895076
I haven't had sex in years. I couldn't help myself
>>679906729
Have you not seen cloverfield lane?
The sun is a lie and the aliens are coming
>>679906454
smoke bomb?
might as well
>>679895751
i love you anon
>>679906664
Yes
>>679906779
well it just adds protein right? surely you guys can still enjoy it?
>>679906643
R..robbie....he's dead man.....he was running around naked...clawing his eyes socket....with with his fingers.....
>>679906907 >>679907125
Well we could use cocaine as a replacement.
>>679906779
That guy screaming about his melting dick isn't Edward is it?
Guys. I brought rabbits. We can farm these fuckers and eat like kings if we can get them to eat jizzsicles.
>>679907125
the product needs to be pure!
>>679896701
Sorry the shit barrel was full
>>679907125
But I don't want crabs. What if some survive and I get them? I've only fucked the trap, Karen, because I know she doesn't have any stds.
>>679907296
It is.
>>679907201
dafuq. that was actually kinda unsettling.
>>679895448
tips fedora*
MY SISTER PASSED OUT! Keep her safe while I get her medicine ok anon?
>>679903880
>killed and eaten immediately
>>679894821
Lets do it. Fuck sam.
>>679907424
There goes our meth...
>>679907831
>Brother
yo guys i found this outside
is it edible???
>>679907939
DUDE WE HAVE RYE.... WE CAN GIVE OURSELVES ERGOT POISONING!
You Up?
guys where the fuck am i, i just woke up? Where the fuck is my foot
>>679907967
(SHIT!) Y..yea brother hahaha...who's on the right mind bringer a sister here lol lol lol, a sissy brother. Keep my sissy brother safe ok?
>>679908155
no, but it is drinkable
>>679907668
tips head back to insert my penis deeper down your throat*
see guys we dont have to resort to rape when there is a perfectly good mouthhole on this guy. im done by the way if someone needs the mouth
>>679907831
she definitely WON'T be covered in semen when you get back.
>>679908155
Try it
>>679907831
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.
>>679908408
Great! Keep he.....him! Him safe bro!
>>679907831
sure, ill just offer her some eggs
>>679906729
I know right? It's great up here!
think I'm gonna settle down here
>>679908537
steve.....he just lost his mind and run outside.....
How many of us left?
>>679907146
that's cause he touched my hershey bar.
Look at this cool clock I found in the reactor room
>>679908860
Ahmed stop fucking around with your clocks and help fix the meth you fuck.
>>679908516
your life is less valuable than mine mate
>>679907345
Who raped the rabbits????
>>679908217
oh welcome drifter! glad you came to, sam got a bit restless and munched on your foot.
we found you top side screaming obscenities at a ronald mcdonald mannequin. after you scraped your dick all up from trying to fuck him in the ass.... we all knew youd fit right in here with us :)
If i get dubs i cause the apocalpse again
>>679896573
In a way, we're all round boxes.
>>679896514
oh fuck
>>679908860
>>679909033
They'd just run if they didn't get addicted to jizz man.
>>679908835
T...this bar?
HEY FAGGOTS BOB AND JEREMY ARE FIGHTING AGAIN COME WATCH!
>>679901566
Half of the faggots here man
>>679909265
If..IF they get addicted, and run out of jizz....what do you think will happen?????
I found a foot in my toilet anyone wanna eat it with me?
>>679909501
im betting 20% on Bob
>>679909655
i think i know who left it there
>>679909501
oooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH
OP HERE. On the radio I heard the gooks were dropping more bombs! It's a free for all now!
>>679909617
That's what the frozen jizz is for. Keep up man
>>679909966
DUBS GET YOU CAN EAT 75% OF FOOT
Woah hey guys, didn't see you there. Welcome to the /b/ bunker.
>>679907831
>>679908408
>>679908701
Back guys! Thx for keeping her safe.....whaaaaaat?????
Hey guys, I found a folding chair! Wonder what would happen if I threw it across the main hall?
>>679910436
Aw shit...
>>679910126
They were gnawing steve's cock!
>>679910436
awww shiiiieeeet!
>>679910436
nigga
>>679892961
wheres johnny have you seen him??
>>679910436
Damn it Jim we have been over this !
>>679892961
I AM A FUCK MACHINE! WHO WANTS TO HELP PRESERVE THE HUMAN RACE!
>>679910436
>>679910760
i offer my boipussy for the sake of humanity
>>679910760
Go fuck yourself
>>679910712
I'm sorry Sam Johnny got caught in the blast when the first few bombs fell
>>679910712
What johny? There's never been any Johny here
>>679902605
p o s t
Remember when we were making meth? So like where are we on that?
Guys...How long have we been here? And how many girl left?
>>679911020
Wait that was meth? I baked a cake with it.
HEY GINO! WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU YA FUCKING WOP!
>>679911065
6 tied up in steves room
>>679910712
jonny is kill
>>679911020
Edward got crabs on the lye.
So right now we are preparing Rye invested with Ergot, so we can give ourselves ergot poisoning.
>>679892961
any femanons want to fuck?
>>679896514
DON'T LISTEN TO IT! IT'S A GODDAMN SYNTH THAT'S COME HERE TO TAKE OUR PRECIOUS METALS!
>>679911020
Edward melted his dick on one of the ingredient and Walter don't want to make non-pure meth so....
>>679911065
2 and a half. 2 and 1/4 after stew tonight
Who farted? GOd dammmit are the air scrubbers even on ?!?
and put your fucking shoes on! I don't want to smell your dirty foot.
Fuck I hope we take a direct hit and put me out of my misery.
>>679911301
I'll make the meth. But Ergot poisoning is better.
Plus we may have some other ingredients for LSD, so tripping on Ergot might not happen. Tripping on LSD may happen.
So Dick Melt Meth or LSD/Ergot
So boys, considering we're in a bunker with nothing else to do... wanna create some sort of exoskeleton armor so we can wreak havoc on the plebs left on the surface?
>>679911065
i claimed the 4 youngest girls, but i forgot to feed them and now they are dead
new threat???
>>679911543
Better yet, want to create some sort of super gun?
>>679911543
let's do it, but with a Warhammer 40K twist where we use the machine spirit of Trump to make a mech.
>>679911638
That'd be good idea. We need to keep a log of our exploits till the inevitable ergot poisoning and starvation.
>>679911638
Synths. Obviously. Didn't you hear a word of what I said? Also, skinwalkers. Watch out for those motherfuckers. They wanna kill us because they associate us with those assholes on /k/ that killed a bunch of them before all hell broke loose topside.
>>679910838
NO BOITPUSSY! ONLY GURLPUSSY!
WHY WON'T ANY FEMANONS HAVE SEX WITH ME???
>>679910842
I'LL FUCK YOU! THAT'LL SHOW YOU WHAT'S WHAT!
>>679911899
>Implying skinwalkers deserve anything other than bullets and butt-plugs
/k/ was right all along.
>>679911812
Good. Not only will we be able to build an impenetrable wall, we'll also be a weapon to surpass metal gear.
Someone orders a pizza?
>>679912133
No. They are merely protecting their lands from those fucktards. Its the only thing they know how to do.
wait. who are we fighting again?
>>679911899
o-oh yeah skinwalkers are terrible hahahahaaa.....
excuse me i have to go take someones sk- i mean virginity you know how it is with humans ahha
>>679910873
>>679911175
yessss he told me to take care of his wife if he was kill
>>679912310
/k/ didn't do shit besides hike and blow up rocks and cans, Skinwalkers always try and start shit.
