YLYL
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
YLYL
>>679126014
nah, cringe thread instead
this float your boat anon?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bOTCGkbfSCo
Lost to this yesterday
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7gwaBXRVG0
it gets really funny if you make it past 5 minutes
>>679126014
>>679126272
wtf
Fuck up cunt it's not even a good meme
>>679126285
nothing funny at all about this
OC
>>679126272
>>679126341
Lost to the filename holy shit
>>679126453
What the fuck
>>679126453
Thats a very weird dinger donger.
>>679126187
If that is what you lost to, then I find your sense of humor as dry and boring as your moms vagina.
>>679126212
cringe
>>679126272
Holy shit fam I just died a little. Maybe he had a 'nam flashback to bangin' sweet kiddy gook poon.
>>679126752
not even her
>>679126658
At least it's in the loo
>>679126875
fuck off faggot and take that fam shit with your queer ass
>>679126574
>>679126272
Pedo Joe
>>679127227
>>679126124
lost
>>679126453
Is that a hand around the guys dick on the right? Or is that just a hugely bloated/inflamed benis?
>>679127210
>>679127227
>>679127266
>You people...
>>679126464
Not funny. Try again fag
>Be me, 24.
>Job as a postman, sucks but I get to know the neighborhood well.
>Walking down a avenue, really beautiful.
>Actually feeling good.
>Smell something odd, sort of sweaty. I ignore it.
>Continue walking down avenue. Lots of autumn leaves falling.
>Sweat smell intensifies.
>whatthefuck.jpeg
>Stop to chuck a newspaper at a doorstep of a house.
>A really ugly house, dead garden, no paintjob and generally unclean.
>Chuck newspaper, hits door
>I ignore it, hoping nobody heard. I spoke too soon
>Loud thumping footsteps coming from in the house.
>door opens, and I begin to back away.
>It's a furry.
>The smell is now overwhelming, I nearly pass out.
>He's a big brown dog, with spaghetti and (presumably) Jizz stains on his suit.
>He begins to bark in a horrifying fashion
>Remember dogs don't like postmen, stereotypically.
>Remember a furry will perpetuate any dog stereotype until the death.
>Awshitnigga.png
>I turn to run as fast as I can.
>Too late.
>He jumps and tackles me, and completely immobilises me, he must be extremely obese.
>I'm shitting my pants in fear.
>Furfag moves dog abomination head towards mine.
>Breathes on my face for a solid five seconds, and I can barely breathe.
>He whispers in my ear in a positively gleeful voice: "ruff, ruff"
>I'm going to die now.
>He repositions himself.
>I hear a unzipping noise.
>I brace myself for the unthinkable.
>He pulls down my pants, revealing my ass.
>He makes happy barking noises.
>I try desperately to call for help, but my mouth is covered by his paw.
>He penetrates me and starts thrusting with the power and speed of a million suns.
>"YIFF! YIFF! YIFF!"
>I'm being raped by a furry.
>He blows a giant load up my ass as I cry in hopelessness.
>He runs off, leaving me on his driveway.
>I lie there, pants down and crying for 15 minutes.
>I have been violated.
>By a furry.
>I get up, and run home, forgetting the letters.
>Worst day of my life.
>>679127032
Damn pull the cock out of your ass. Go back to Tumblr with your triggered ass.
>>679126778
fake, her name is tessa fowler
>>679126909
god, wish i knew where i could find a butt like that. i dont care what gender it is
>>679126492
Curry club?
>>679127384
>>679126272
>be me
>middle of the night
>browsing /b/ on phone
>hear crying through baby monitor
>bring phone to baby room
>start rocking my son
>the heir to whatever the Fuck I can give him
>the most precious thing I have ever produced
>grab phone as I'm rocking him to sleep
>thatbeautifulquiet.gif
>see this fucking GIF
>sides explode almost drop crown prince
>mother has him now she's pissed
>posting from couch
11/10 worth it
>>679126909
>boy
>girlfriend
Nigga u gay
>>679126313
>>679126272
jesus christ that looks creepy as fuck, even the girls knew it was fucked up
>>679126807
if it has a dick it is a man
Mine eyes have seen the glory
Of the desu of the board
She is spamming out the desu
Where the maidens of wrath are stored
She has loosed the fateful desu
Of her terrible desu sword
Desu is marching on
I have seen her in the replies
Of a hundred thousand breads
They have builded her a garden
Laced with ribbons and with threads
I can tell apart her visage
From those two eyes, green and red!
Desu is marching on
I have read a fiery desu
Writ in polished rows of jade
For all who would condemn her
Of Suiseiseki, be afraid!
Let our heros, Desu Legion
Come swiftly to her aid!
Since desu is marching on
Glory, glory, to DESU! Glory, glory, to DESU!
Glory, glory, to DESU! Desu is marching on!
She has sounded forth the desu
That shall never call retreat
She is sifting out the dreams of men
Before her desu-seat
Oh, be swift, my heart
To march for her, be jubilant, my feet!
Our Desu is marching on
Glory, glory, to DESU! Glory, glory, to DESU!
Glory, glory, to DESU! Desu is marching on!
In the beauty of sakuras
Desu was born across the sea
With a spirit in her bosom
That transfixes you and me
As she tended to the soul trees
Let us keep our boards strong and free!
While Desu is marching on
Glory, glory, to DESU! Glory, glory, to DESU!
Glory, glory, to DESU! Desu is marching on!
>>679127642
>>679126272
> be me
> pedo politician
> subtly sliding my hands over some young asian hunny's sugar lumps
> tfw I didn't realize cameras were on me
> Tfw 4chan spread it around
> I just wanted to diddle an Asian fiddle, and I would've gotten away with it if it weren't for them meddlin' austists
>>679127777
NOICE GET
>>679127697
moshi moshi desu desu
>>679126272
>>679126574
>>679127830
quads confim based spidey
I am the desu of my board
Desu is my body and shitposts are my blood
I have derailed over a thousand threads
Unknown to snacks, nor known to moot
Have withstood pain to create many desu
Yet, these hands will never hold desu
So as I desu, unlimited desu spam
>>679126453
>>679127835
>>679127907
HI, I'M SUISEISEKI, FOUNDER AND CEO OF ROZEN MAIDEN. MY BEAMS OF LIGHT GLOWED UPON YOUR SISTER LAST NIGHT, HER UNKNOWING FORM FAST ASLEEP. MY PULSING BOATLIGHTS FLASHED UPON HER, AND SHE AWOKE WITH A GASP. DEATHLY AFRAID OF MY MASSIVE, LUMINOUS RETINAS, SHE ATTEMPTED TO CRAWL AWAY BUT TO NO AVAIL. I PENETRATED HER WITH MY CHRISTMAS COLORS OF EYES, HER SCREAMS OF BOTH PAIN AND PLEASURE. MY PULSATING FLASHING BOATLIGHTS DROVE HER INTO A DEADLY EPILLEPTIC SEIZURE, BEFORE YOU COULD EVEN WAKE UP HER BONES HAD CRACKED ON THEMSELVES DUE TO THE VIOLENT MOVEMENTS OF HER BODY, CAUSING HER A DEATH LIKE NONE OTHER BEFORE IT. I GUARANTEE IT ~DESU
>>679127961
Auf der Heide blüht ein kleines Blümelein
Und das heißt: Desu
Heiß von hunderttausend kleinen Bienelein
Wird umschwärmt Desu
Denn ihr Herz ist voller Süßigkeit,
Zarter Duft entströmt dem Blumenkleid
Denn ihr Herz ist voller Süßigkeit,
Zarter Duft entströmt dem Blumenkleid
Auf der Heide blüht ein kleines Blümelein
Und das heißt: Desu
In der Heimat wohnt ein kleines Mägdelein
Und das heißt: Desu
Dieses Mädel ist mein treues Schätzelein
Und mein Glück, Desu
Wenn das Heidekraut rot-lila blüht,
Singe ich zum Gruß ihr dieses Lied.
Auf der Heide blüht ein kleines Blümelein
Und das heißt: Desu
In mein'm Kämmerlein blüht auch ein Blümelein
Und das heißt: Desu
Schon beim ersten Morgengrau'n sowie beim Dämmerschein
Schaut's mich an, Desu
Und dann ist es mir, als spräch' es laut:
Denkst du auch an deine kleine Braut?
In der Heimat weint um dich ein Mägdelein
Und das heißt: Desu
>>679127992
>>679126272
lost
>>6791>>679127887
The superhero /b/ deserves
>>679126735
That photo is a cp model
(notthatiknow)
>>679127659
i dont get it
>>679127266
DUBS CONFIRM
The desu desu people sitting around all day.
Who can believe you
Who can believe you
Let your mother desu
Desu
Desu
I'm not there all the time you know some people some people call it desu
I play Russian roulette every day a desu sport
With a bullet called desu
Yea mama called desu
You ever time i try to desu where I really desu its already where i desu
Cause i already desu
The desu desu people sitting around all day
Who can believe you
Who can believe you
Let your mother desu
Desu
I got a desu the other day from sako
Its cute small fits right in my pocket
Yea right it my pocket
My girl you know she lashes out at me sometimes and i just fucking her and ooo desu
Shes desu
People are always chasing me down,
Trying to push my face to the ground,
Where all they really want to do,
Is suck out my mother fucking desu
My desu
The desu desu people sitting around all day
Who can believe you
Who can believe you
Let your mother desu
I sit
In my desolate room
No desu
No desu
Just desu
I killed every
I'm away forever
But I'm feeling desu
How do i feel
What do i say
Desu it all goes away
How do i feel
What do i say
Desu it all goes away
>>679128131
>>679128077
>>679126313
FFS... Spiderman threads are for incest threads... stop shit posting getting as bad as fucking bananas
>>679128077
>>679126212
I would ram this car on principle. My Jeep could probably take it. Just look at all that rust. The back end would probably disintegrate on contact. Nothing but the cancerous bumper stickers holding the remains together.
>>679128185
>>679128082
>>679128328
>>679128272
HIYA SUISEISEKI! HI ANON!
DO YOU WANT TO GO FOR A RIDE?
SURE ANON.
JUMP IN.
I'M A DESU GIRL, IN A DESU WORLD. LIFE IN BISQUE, IT'S RISQUÉ.
YOU CAN BRUSH MY HAIR, DESU ME EVERYWHERE. IMAGINATION, IT'S A DESU NATION!
COME ON DESU, LET'S GO DESU!
I'M A DESU GIRL, IN A DESU WORLD. LIFE IN BISQUE, IT'S RISQUÉ.
YOU CAN BRUSH MY HAIR, DESU ME EVERYWHERE. IMAGINATION, IT'S A DESU NATION!
I'M A ROZEN MAIDEN GIRL, IN A 2D WORLD,
DRESS ME UP, MAKE IT TIGHT, I'M YOUR DOLLY.
YOU'RE MY DOLL, J-ROCK'N'ROLL, FEEL THE GLAMOR, FEEL THE LOLZ,
KISS ME HERE, TOUCH ME THERE, HANKY PANKY.
YOU CAN TOUCH, YOU CAN PLAY, IF YOU SAY "DESU FOREVER"
I'M A DESU GIRL, IN A DESU WORLD. LIFE IN BISQUE, IT'S RISQUÉ.
YOU CAN BRUSH MY HAIR, DESU ME EVERYWHERE. IMAGINATION, IT'S A DESU NATION!
COME ON DESU, LET'S GO DESU! (AH AH AH YEAH)
COME ON DESU, LET'S GO DESU! (OH OH)
COME ON DESU, LET'S GO DESU! (AH AH AH YEAH)
COME ON DESU, LET'S GO DESU! (OH OH)
MAKE ME WALK, MAKE ME TALK, DO WHATEVER YOU PLEASE, I CAN ACT LIKE A STAR, I CAN BEG ON MY KNEES.
COME JUMP IN, ROZEN FRIEND, LET US DO IT AGAIN, HIT THE TOWN, DESU AROUND, LET'S GO DESU
YOU CAN TOUCH, YOU CAN PLAY, IF YOU SAY "DESU FOREVER!"
YOU CAN TOUCH, YOU CAN PLAY, IF YOU SAY "DESU FOREVER!"
COME ON DESU, LET'S GO DESU! (AH AH AH YEAH)
COME ON DESU, LET'S GO DESU! (OH OH)
COME ON DESU, LET'S GO DESU! (AH AH AH YEAH)
COME ON DESU, LET'S GO DESU! (OH OH)
I'M A DESU GIRL, IN A DESU WORLD. LIFE IN BISQUE, IT'S RISQUÉ.
YOU CAN BRUSH MY HAIR, DESU ME EVERYWHERE. IMAGINATION, IT'S A DESU NATION!
I'M A DESU GIRL, IN A DESU WORLD. LIFE IN BISQUE, IT'S RISQUÉ.
YOU CAN BRUSH MY HAIR, DESU ME EVERYWHERE. IMAGINATION, IT'S A DESU NATION!
COME ON DESU, LET'S GO DESU! (AH AH AH YEAH)
COME ON DESU, LET'S GO DESU! (OH OH)
COME ON DESU, LET'S GO DESU! (AH AH AH YEAH)
COME ON DESU, LET'S GO DESU! (OH OH)
OH, I'M HAVING SO MUCH FUN! WELL SUISEISEKI, WE ARE JUST GETTING STARTED. OH, I LOVE YOU ANON!
>>679128353
>>679126492
toplel someone wrote "fur fag" on his glasses
>>679128399
The Desu went down to 4chan. She was lookin' for a soul to steal.
She was in a bind 'cause she was way behind. She was willing to make a deal
When she came across this young man sawin' on a desu and playin' it hot.
And the Desu jumped upon a sakura stump and said "Boy, let me tell you what."
"I guess you didn't know it, but I'm a desu player, too.
And if you'd care to take a dare I'll make a bet with you.
Now you play a pretty good desu, boy, but give the Desu her due.
I'll bet a desu of gold against your soul 'cause I think I'm better than you."
The boy said, "My name's Jun, and it might be a sin,
But I'll take your bet; and you're gonna regret 'cause I'm the best there's ever been."
Jun, Rozen up your bow and play your desu hard.
'Cause Desu's broke loose in 4chan and the Desu deals the cards.
And if you win you get this shiny desu made of gold,
But if you lose the Desu gets your soul.
The Desu opened up her case and she said, "I'll start this show."
And fire flew from her fingertips as she Rozen'd up her bow.
And she pulled the bow across the strings and it made an evil hiss.
And a band of maidens joined in and it sounded something like this.
When the Desu finished, Jun said, "Well, you're pretty good, Desu-san,
But sit down in that chair right there and let me show you how it's done."
"Desu on the Mountain." Run, boys, run!
The Desu's in the house of the rising sun;
Desu's in the bread pan picking out dough.
Desu, does your dog bite? No, child, no.
The Desu bowed her head because she knew that she'd been beat.
And she laid that golden desu on the ground at Jun's feet.
Jun said, "Desu, just come on back. If you ever wanna try again,
I done told you once—you desu bitch—I'm the best that's ever been."
And he played:
"Desu on the Mountain." Run, boys, run!
The Desu's in the house of the rising sun;
Desu's in the bread pan picking out dough.
Desu, does your dog bite? No, child, no.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Txnwlf2tj9w
>>679126453
He had a penis enlargement surgery using the skin of his arm, it's disgusting
>>679128446
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gbasvkiueFY
all this unfunny spiderman shit.
Posting an image that actually is humorous.
>>679126407
i dunno, im having a good laugh at the guy who took the picture
>>679128436
Mother Suiseiseki loves us, she loves me and you and everybody, and through the teachings of her sacred word we will live in harmony and oneness, and ascend into a state of pure anonymity ~desu
When we are all the same mind and spirit~
~desu, the sacred sound, so that it may resonate within us and flow out to touch the ethereal beyond ~desu
the sacred vibration, resonates with the great fiery waters beyond the universe, and touches god
~desu appears embraced in a beautiful chorus of vibration
Mother Suiseiseki is in all things, in all places. You can not imprison her any more than you could cage the wind ~desu.
Suiseiseki cultivates the possibility, ever so gently pulling it from the one all, so that it is allowed to manifest ~desu.
It is through these manifestations of temporary individuality that the spirit energy is made to grow before returning to the great nothing ~desu.
Suiseiseki is all things, and thus the evil is also required~ But it is always the way, that the evil do not know they are only aiding in cosmic unity, because they are driven by selfishness and hate. While the good, know that the evil is also a part of the all. Which is what allows them to be full of love for all things ~desu.
Its in this way, that suiseiseki can favor only one, because where love is given it is got, and hatred breeds death. The duality extends to all depths, even into the heart of suiseiseki herself. So that she needs not give equal favor to each side, even though each is equal in the universe ~desu.
This is the difference between the mind and the spirit, the mind knows not the spirit, the spirit knows not at all, but drives all things ~desu.
>>679128497
>be me
>9th grade
>get on bus after school
>overhear this thing. Let's call it "Shelby"
>It groans and moans on about how it loves Nickleback
>five minutes into the bus ride she shows me her drawings.
>fucking print outs of things she drew on MS paint
>stupid fucking chibis
>five minutes later
>the thing starts eating
>you can hear it's desperate cries for breathe under the rolls of slimy fat
>*breathing intensifies*
>She then says "lol xddd im so randum y i got to be so fat xdddddd lol :333333 xpppppppppp"
>It then starts eating more
>I look to my side only to see it's eating chocolate milk powder
Tell her she should shut up and stop being a fat slob
>ohshit.jpg
>big mistake /b/
>The beast awakens
>the thing pathetically slaps my shoulder
>i push her away
>she then says shes being raped
>tell her shes not and that shes ugly
>see her next day with cuts up and down her arms and black makeup
>mfw
>>679128527
>>679128487
>>679128561
>>679128567
>>679128570
>>679128603
>>679126014
>didn't kek
Fuck you
>>679127801
lost
>>679128625
With ten thousand faces
Agendas and fates
I have nothing in common with me
I hate all my races
And genders and states
I'd rather be no one and free
Come desu until morning
Don't think; disappear
No one will know it was us
With no advance warning
I'll wipe the world clear
I am Suiseiseki.
~
>>679126492
Illuminati confirmed?
>>679128614
>>679128705
>>679128744
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~
>>679126492
I go to this college. The anime club was fighting with foam swords when I saw the club meet or whatever it is. They do what they enjoy though so you can't hate them for that. I mean you can but its a waste of hate.
>>679126735
>>679128093
fixed it
>>679128717
looks like we have a newfag
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>>679126807
>>679128421
No. I'm afraid he did that himself
>>679126014
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>>679128896
left please
>>679126909
"Girl"friend
>>679126909
fucking faggots
>>679127384
>>679127466
he says he is a postman that got raped by a furry dressed as a dog
fake and autistic story
>>679126971
>>679128648
I think you missed the... you know what? No, that's fine.
>>679128122
dubs double confirm!
>>679127266
>>679127227
>>679127266
Dubs speaks da truth!
>>679128866
hardly a crime compared to being hypocritical.
>>679127384
You liked it, don't try to say otherwise.
He was obese, you had some distance between you and him, managed to start running and still got raped?
>>679129206
And on that hard disk they found...
>>679129206
>you better not know
>>679129315
>>679129519
>>679129551
And saved.
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>>679126752
Wtf is this for real? O.o
>>679127522
lol
>>679129715
Kill yourself
>>679127343
MODS MODS
>>679127675
reddit>4chan
>>679129572
>>679126574
How you doin' lil' mama? Let me whisper in ya ear, tell ya somethin' that ya might like to hear....
>>679128034
Wat the actual Fuck
>>679126807
People posting this pic have obviously never been with a girl, or they were just god awful at sex.
>>679130586
>>679127384
Why does everyone on this site post retarded shit that never happened
Please tell me Desu-athon is happening again.
It was fun the first time.
Like... 10 years ago
>>679130957
i once fucked my sister when she was black out drunk. no one ever found out
>>679130957
>mom
>mom they posted it again
>mom they are posting greentext again
> waaaaagh waaaaaa screeeeech
> sweetie I told you to stay off that site
> breathe sweetie
> stop screaming
> stay off that site with the greentext since it triggers your episodes
> wwaaaaaaaaaa
>>679126752
More like this?
>>679131036
Hello there Alex
>>679131036
I once fucked a buck that was fucking a doe. Antlers make the best handholds.
>>679130957
>>679126807
>>679126909
god i need myself one of those, or my gf needs to man up and start sucking
>>679130957
>>679130957
>>679131226
my name's jeffrey
>>679131087
I was just eyerolling at that guys post and here you are actually getting triggered.
Great job
>>679130957
>>679131453
Defending faggotry on a anonymous website.
This level of faggotry just shouldn't occur.
ᵈᵉˢᵘ
>>679126752
lost
>>679131226
Isn't that asian guy from the weeaboo informative video
>>679131647
yet here you are
>>679126807
I totally read that as sassy girl at first and was confused.
>>679130356
Lost
>>679130136
Lost
>>679127506
the face of a winner
>>679127384
Why am i getting a boner from this?
>>679132176
You want to deliver mail?
>>679131943
mfw
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you have run out of pseudo arguments, that are only given any weight by attaching reaction images.
>>679127266
You may have one of my internets good sir!
>>679130957
i ate a grape once
>>679126574
enough joe, please
>>679126806
almost lost to this shit.
>that fucking bear
>that dinger donger
>>679128896
Calling someone gay.
>let me first save this image with a guys naked ass and dick and zoom in really hard to edit something in the image.
Im dying
>>679126124
That has to be troll right ?
r-right ?
>>679129425
i figured the "hard disk" was a euphemism for penis
>>679127506
shame the names are blocked out, his profile was left public last time I checked and the entire thing was a good laugh
>>679126658
This actually looks appetising
>>679136451
Who said he was popping boners and shit while editing, fagguette?
>>679126634
My question question is why do you have two pictures named restroom
>>679130356
Fucking lost
>>679127659
>11 KB 262x193
>Actual picture is 2592x1944
How?
>>679126874
Lost
