Worst jokes you know /b/.
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
Worst jokes you know /b/.
How do you get a nigger pregnant? You cum on her feet and let the flies do the rest.
How do you make an egg roll?
You push it.
Personal fav: What's the difference between Christ, and a picture of Christ?
[spoiler]The picture only needed 1 nail[/spoiler]
life
>>676861333
trips speaks the truth
what do you call a gay artist?
pick asshole
What the difference between a dirty bus stop and a crab with breast implants?
One is a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean.
what's the difference between a jew and a pizza
even after they get put in the oven jews aren't worth anything
>>676861545
Actually this is a great one!
a naked white woman on a magazine is called a playboy. What do you call a topless black woman on a magazine?
national geographic
What do you call a flying skunk??? Smellicopter
>>676862245
that aint even a joke, thats true
What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? Cancer
Why was the strawberry sad?
Because he heard his mother was in a jam!
Why don't lobsters and crabs share food with each other?
>>Because they're shellfish.
What does the cop say to his shirt? You're under a vest
>>676863390
haha that was a funny
If you throw a nigger and a wetback from a tree. Which one hits the ground first? The nigger dosent hit the ground
What do you say to someone who is afraid of pedophiles?
-- Grow-up
>>676860848 (You)
That was horrible, you're horrible.
What was Hitler's fave beverage?
Jews
what does an all you can eat seafood buffet have in common with a hookers pussy?
both have crabs
how do you make a hormone?
dont pay her
What's the hardest part about being a Pedophile? Fitting in
me: knock knock
person: who there
>the funny part is it was a ding dong ditch, fucking rused
>>676860518
niggers
Women's Rights
You know what's the good part of dating 28 year olds, wait for it... They're 20 of them
So, this Catholic priest and this Jewish Rabi walk past this little boy and the priest says. "Let's screw that little boy". And the Rabi says "Out of how much"?
What breaks when you give it to a toddler?
Their Hips
These two terrorists jump from a building. Which hits the ground first?.... Who cares
>>676865063
kek
>>676860518
pic related
Hey /b/ are you guys alright?
No you're all left.
yo mama so fat she masturbates to a cook book
What kind of file can make a 5mm hole into a 15mm hole?... Pedophile
What's red and climbs tree's. Paul walkers Porsche
Why do you put a baby in a blender feet first? So you can look in its eyes when you come.
>>676865597
>>676864252
kenton
whats the opposite of Christopher Walking
Christopher Reeves (hes cripple)
>>676865817
lost
Just chilling with my new Lambrogini here
Guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender if he has any helicopter flavored potato chips.
Bartender says nope, only plane.
how many babies does it take to paint a barn?
>depends how hard you throw them
What's the only hard part about walking through a field of dead babies? My cock
How did they know Paul walker had dandruff? they found his head and shoulders in the glove box
knock knock
who's there?
ella
ella who?
ELLAHU AKBAR
What you call the number after C? D you faggot
Why do jews wear those funny little hats?
So you don't see the wick.
How do you save a nigger/jew/mexican from drowning?
You remove your foot from the back of his head
>>676866599
>number after C
what...
Op walks into a gaybar. That's it. He is gay.
>>676860518
you're dick
what's the difference between a bitch and the mafia?
A slip of the tongue and you're in deep shit
Added Paul walker on Xbox live ashame he's always on his dash board
What's the best way to trick a nigger?
Tell him his dad returned.
A nigger a faggot and a muslim jump off a building to see who hits the ground first. Who wins?
Society
an alcohol
>>676866599
>number
>>676866812
no, sorry that's the best one, the worst is... idk, the jokes you usually tell or something
>>676866817
wait I fucked this up
how is are the mafia and a bitch alike?
A slip of the tongue and you're in deep shit
there we go
How do you kill a swarm of flies? Slap an African
>>676866691
i dont get it. are jews candles or bombs or ???
>>676866109
/thread
>>676866954
>>676861521
Kek
>>676867040
autism levels is are rising
More of a situational joke, but still funny
>le me talking to younger friend
>she tells me she may be sick with something
>dick me says "If it's cancer I'll be the Jesse Pinkmann to your Walter White"
>lookskillmethenandthere.jpg
>all they say is "why you gotta guess right"
Now I'm Jesse, BITCH
A nigger goes to jail......
My life
>>676867341
Are you having a stroke m8?
An old man gets put into a nursing home by his son, after his son leaves a busty nurse comes into the room and gives the old man a blowjob which makes the old man very happy, later on when he is going to the dining hall he falls on the ground, not soon after an big male orderly comes and fucks him in the ass.
the next day his son comes to visit, he asks the old man how his first day was and the old man says it was terrible, the young man says why and the old man says "I got a blowjob from a nurse" and the son says "That is a good thing, old man"
The old man then says "I also got fucked in the ass by a big male orderly after falling down in the hall" after a silence the old man states "I only got a boner once a month, i fall down numerous times a day"
>>676867143
the nazis made candles and soap out of the corpses
>>676867464
Oh you poor little anon.
>>676867341
>>676860518
>So I'm eating my grandma's pussy
>and I think to myself "Goddamn, this tastes JUST like horse cum..."
>then I think "...omg..."
>"Is that how she died?"
>>676867599
oh...... hah!
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they'll just beat it for being black
>>676865063 Remembering that one
What's blue and black and doesn't fuck?
The bitch in the trunk of my car.
Me
Did you know princess Diana had dandruff?
They found her Head and Shoulders in the dash.
Why don't black people take cruises?
They ain't falling for that shit again.
>>676865759
Kek
How do you fit three gay men on one stool?
You flip it over!
The holocaust
Why do women get their periods every month?
Because they deserve it.
>>676860518
What do you call a gay dinosaur?
>megasaurarse
What do call lesbian dinosaur?
>Lickalotopus
>>676863936
Took a second
>>676867652
jesus
What's the difference between a woman and nigger?
A nigger is smarter.
So, this guy fucks his bosse's wife. And asks him why he looks so tired. "Oh I was just up all night" says the man. "Doing what"? "Your wife"
How do you give a woman an orgasm?
Who cares.
Why is Jeb Bush so bad at pokemon?
His attacks are low energy
>>676860518
The Welsh.
Feminists
>>676868574
sauce?
>>676865063
I thought it was "outta what?"
>>676869156
The interweb?
>>676865759
Why do you put a baby in a blender head first? So you can see its feet curl
>>676869200
it is
>>676865972
Brilliant
>>676864725
Anyone else call this "nigger knocking" when you were a kid?
>>676869156
5 sec films man
Some of them are bretty good
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YjJTrlabbTM
>>676869412
Yea.
What's harder to pick up? A 20 bowling balls or 20 dead babies?
>>ever tried picking up a bowling ball with a pitchfork
>>676868245
Still waiting to get it
your life
>>676870094
Noose
In a tree
>>676870210
Your life
What's the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean?
I've never had a garbanzo bean on my face.
Roman came home from school one day all happy and his mom asked him "Why are you so happy, Roman? Did something good happen today" Roman responded "Yes i finally answered a question in school today!" His mom responded with "Your father will be so proud, Tell us all about it at dinnertime" Later on his father gets home and they sit down to eat, Roman's father says "Your mother says you answered a question today in school, Roman! I'm so proud of you" Roman responds "Yes i did dad!" Roman's dad asks him "Son, what was the question you answered" Roman responds with " Who farted?".
what do an alcoholic and necrophiliac have in common?
They both like to crack open a cold one
>>676870414
jimmy carr
What has four feet and is able to fly?
Two birds.
What's pink, 6 inches long, and it makes my wife cry when make her suck it?
Her miscarriage.
A news reporter asks a man who survived his smart car getting hit by a semi-truck, how he survived.
The man responds "I was ejected"
>>676860518
whats the difference between a nigger and a swing set?
swing set can support kids
whats the different between a nigger and a pizza?
pizza can feed a family
What do you call 5 Biggers hanging from a tree?
Mississippi wind chimes
If the camera adds ten pounds, do African kids really exist?
>>676860518
I went to a Donald Trump rally and all I got was this Goddamn Communist Nigger Lover t-shirt!
http://i.4cdn.org/gif/1459342003002.webm
>>676872552
>5 Biggers hanging from a tree
>5 Biggers
>Biggers
Sorry old chap I meant niggers to the wind chime joke
>>676872757
this video. I love it.
What do you call a black man in a red car?
Tyrone
why did the tap dancer quit??
Kept falling in the sink
went to an asian internet cafe and after they gave me a fourchan cookie
How many babies does it take to paint a house?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
How are women and computers alike?
You never know how important either one is to you, until they go down on you.
Kid come home from grade school, calls out for his mom. No response. He go upstairs, calls for mom again, no response. He hears something from her room, goes to check it out.
He opens the door and sees his mom getting fucked by his father, balls deep. He says "Mom?" and the two of them panic to cover themselves. The boy runs out of the house in tears, and the father shrugs before getting back to business.
The boy runs to his grandmother's house, and tells her about what he saw. She laughs and takes him inside, promising to explain all about "The birds and the bees."
The dad comes to grandma's house, looking for the son. He calls out to him, no response. Then he hears something from the bedroom. When he opens the door, he sees his son balls deep in his grandmother. The son looks over at his father and yells, "How do you like it when someone fucks your mom?!"
The Aristocrats.
Women's rights.
Old couple married for over 65 years finally has to sell their house and move into a nursing home
They've been there a few months and gotten to know the other people there really well
One day though the old lady came back to the room from bingo early and her husband was there getting a hand job from another elderly woman
He runs out after her and she immediately confronts him, "How could you! After all these years, what does she have that I don't!??"
The old man looked at her for a moment and said, "Parkinson's"
>>676872018
Explain
What did the leper say to the whore?
Keep the tip.
What do you call a sleep walking nun?
A Roman Catholic!
How do you fit 30 Jews in a car?
Two in the front, two in the back, and the rest in the ash tray.
What happened to the peanut when it went into the alleyway?
It got assaulted!
>>676864992
>You know what's the good part of dating 28 year olds, wait for it... They're 20 of them
Protip:
Works better if you type out "Twenty eight".
>>676867341
>le
Oh you fagot.
What's the last thing to go through the mind of a guy working on the World Trade Center?
Economy class
