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What's the weirdest thing you've stuck your dick into?

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Thread replies: 30
Thread images: 9
File: Kim Jong Bong.gif (3 MB, 720x405) Image search: [Google]
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What's the weirdest thing you've stuck your dick into?

P.S. Fuck
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>>674333409
A vagina. My hand isn't as weird as a vagina.
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My mouth and my mouth
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>>674333758
The fuck you talkin bout?
Vag is the shit
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tursiops truncatus
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>>674333409
my mouth.
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>>674334496
It's the shit, but have you ever considered exactly how weird the vagina is?
It's got all these flaps, it's dynamic in microfauna, the peehole is right fucking there, you could the outside on accident and give it a UTI, it bleeds monthly, which also upsets normal day-to-day fucking sessions along with UTI's. I mean, life could have designed the vagina to be just a little better.
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A dog
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>>674333912
>>674335134
prove it faggots
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>>674333409
>have diaper fetish
>have slight messy fetish
>experiment with shoving various foods/substances into diapers
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>>674333409
A fat chick. I'm never doing that again.
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Two of the same numbers
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one of these
only used water as lube
thousands of microscopic rugburns on the head of my penis after completion
never again
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Skin on my dick and balls dried up like plastic and peeled off for a couple weeks
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A public pay phone phone book.
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I literally went down to a local grocery store near my house, bought a cantaloupe and took it back home where I proceeded to make a hole in it and fuck it.

It was messy but felt good, I came inside it then threw it away. It was kind of a waste of a cantaloupe but I was so horny that day plus I saw a porn video of a man fucking a cantaloupe and really wanted to try it. I'm sure Watermelon feels god-like.
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>>674333409
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>>674338757
pls no
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This was 20 years ago in college. Weekend alone and bored. Felt good for a while. Then I noticed some pain, looked at my dick. I had rubbed it raw.

The moral of this story:
>If you're gonna fuck a cantaloupe, wear a fucking condom.
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No regrets
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>>674335177
>life could have designed the vagina to be just a little better.
It did. That's why there's a pee hose up front and a boy vagina in the rear. Vaginas are an evolutionary dead end.
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>>674337395
>A fat chick. I'm never doing that again.

Are you still lost in the folds?
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>>674338287
Did that when I was 12. Scared the fuck out of me, too embarrassed to tell anyone.
All these years......now I know I'm not alone.
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>>674333409
Pic related (after grinding the tip down and polishing)... Oh, you mean stuck my dick into, not the other way around... hm, that'd be a ziplock bag half full of liquid soap (what? I was in my early 20's and after hours/desperate at the office I was working at).
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>>674341107
Holy fuck dude. What was the temp? You can't just go around leaving details out.
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An orange

not worth, too much mess
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A large can of mashed pumpkin.

It was around the thanksgiving time and I was around 17, my mother had a few of these in the kitchen so I figured, "It's only one, why the hell not?". Shit was not so cash, smelled like shit though it did make my dick kinda soft after.
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>>674341485
95ºF or somewhere thereabout, I was not particularly concerned with it at the time...
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>>674333409
A shemales mouth while on vacation in London.
It was hot as fuck until she farted and it hit me right in the nose. Worst fart I've ever smelt, like rotting fucking cabbage.
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an asshole
Thread replies: 30
Thread images: 9


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