I am a Mormon. Legitimately. Ask me any question, dubs gets my retarded ass answer. Also, fuck this website and the endless list of twelve year old faggots on it.
i live in provo and im not lds. your beliefs are a cult
sage goes in al lfields
>>674321680
No questions here. Just wanted to say you guys look like a bunch of faggots riding bikes with dress clothes on.
>>674321680
How much time are you required to spend proselytizing with your "partner"? Has it ever worked?
Why do you follow a false prophet? Every one of his "disciples" renounced him on their death bed.
Be a Catholic or a Protestant. Stop wasting your time.
>>674322228
you were so close to getting dubs that I'll tell you m8. However long it takes, by wife or the other missionary you have it just depends. It's harder to convince atheists (especially highly cynical ones) to convert. Whereas people of other religions are easier in the sense that they already accept christ or a god, so simply adding that there are living prophets and other prophets than those of traditional religious texts is not too far a stretch of the mind. Thank you for asking.
>>674322822
Lel faggot OP got dubs.
WHY ARE U RACIST AND WHY ARE U VITING FO TRUMP BITCH CRACKER FUCK U WHITEY
you arent allowed internet i thought, so why 4chan of all places?
OP here. I'm going to just answer all questions from now on. Fuck dubs.
>>674322952
Not OP but there are plenty of heathens here that need some Jesus.
>>674322952
We are allowed internet. Porn is highly against the church (admittedly I have a problem, no one is perfect.) and to finish it's mostly cause I love greentext posts. Absolutely hilarious.
>>674321680
Why does your cult leader look so much like nicolas cage?
>>674323229
Deus Vult! luckily Mormon are protestants, we do believe in Christ.
>>674323229
>Needs Jesus in a Mormon thread
>>674322822
Legit question from a Presbyterian: Why Mormonism? Were you born into it or were you converted?
Also, have you heard of the band Nico Vega? Great stuff, and their lead singer is Mormon I believe.
>>674321680
Have you ever watched "The Book of Mormons"? Also Hasa Diga Eebowai
>>674323349
Why does the old pope look like a pedophile? No but in all seriousness both will live on forever (just one in heaven.)
>>674321680
Singles for your thoughts?
>>674323303
interesting, have you seen the south park on your religious belief?
>>674323590
OP again. Admittedly ironic huh?
>>674323770
Are you admitting that your "religion" is, in fact, a cult?
Does the oddities of Smith's prophecy and interpretation kinda give you pause at all? I mean you really don't think native Americans were a lost tribe of Israel that canoed to the Americaa?
I am a Christian and I have trouble swallowing plenty of the stuff in the bible, Old Testament mainly. Tend to believe that a lot of it was parables or made up whole cloth to fill people's curiosity by holy men millenia ago.
Why?
>>674322768
This is a legit question. Why do you follow a false prophet? Jesus was the last one and there are no native Israelis in North America.
>Explain.
>>674321680
When Joseph Smith found the golden tablets, did he then suck a cock?
>>674321680
Among other things, /b is home to many faggots, faggot.
Why are Mormon girls so fucking uptight and all about waiting until marriage to let a guy fuck their cunts but when they're married, their husbands can fuck 7 different women?
>>674323650
I was born into it (sorta). My father served a shit mission in Recife Brazil and I served mine in Paris. I left the church at 13 and then rejoined at 16. So I've been on both sides of the spectrum. Also during that time I did research and surprisingly of all the religions that I looked at Mormonism just made the most sense. (my dad is still a "heathen", but I love him.)
>>674321680
Do you actually believe what they tell you or do you fake it?
>>674323722
No I am afraid. And no idea what the fuck you just said. Thanks though m9.
>>674323870
Yes I have. I admittedly laughed at the time. Although I haven't watched it in a long time, I do remember laughing my ass off, even funnier when you're a part of the joke I guess.
>>674323986
Nope
>>674321680
Do you or will you follow "The Principle" now that the SCOTUS has redefined the definition of marriage?
>>674324058
I would have to agree. I think that it is the same with the Book of Mormon because it is recollections of previous events. So whereas later parts of the books make more sense while older ones don't as much.
>>674324087
Because.
>>674321680
Answer these questions. >>674324132
>>674322768
>or gtfo
What did you think of the South Park episode on Mormonism?
>>674324162
OP here. Actually, once Joseph finished reading the tablets, the Angel Maroni sucked Joseph's fat nigger cock, not the other way around.
>>674324906
You alright anon. Stay based m8.
>>674321680
You're about as LDS as the muslim nigger in the shithouse is American. I'm around real LDS constantly and their is never behavior like yours. Furthermore, you got magic underwear with temple rights to earn. There is no time for faggotchan with all the work you have to put in.
Sage this faggot and fuckoff retard millennials that are dumb enough to fall for this.
>>674321680
What's it like to follow a religion that batshit retarded?
>>674324977
Checked.
I was going to ask the same question.
Dumb, Dumb, dumb dumb dumb.
>>674324132
We believe that Joseph Smith received the priesthood and restored the true gospel that had been lost and corrupted by multiple churches for 1800 years. As for the Israelis it's more so that they were killed off out of america. One faction was cursed by God to have a certain skin color (Indians) for killing all of the Israelis in America. (very similar to what happened to Cain I guess)
>>674321680
Is there no help for the widow's son?
>>674321680
I've noticed that there are no midget Mormons. Is this because you execute them at birth?
>>674324972
already done.
>>674324301
I am a true believer. Thanks for asking.
>>674325369
Ok move long, there is no intelligent life forms here.
>>674324229
Because virgin pussy is the best pussy. Help a man out amiright.
>>674324162
Actual OP here. No.
>>674325369
Is this why Mormons don't, to this day, allow niggers to be Bishops?
OP here. BRB. The wife is bugging me.
>>674325951
Which one? (kek)
>>674325951
tell them we say hello
>>674324686
I will follow the principle. Mormons can be gay but the gay sex part is considered against God. Thanks for asking.
>>674325369
So you're entire church is going against Jesus who said there will be no prophets after me and if they claim to be true, they are false. How can you reconcile that?
Explain the genetic research done on the "Native American Israelis" they literally have no common genetics other than the fact they are both human. How can you reconcile that?
>>674324977
I mentioned my response in an earlier reply. (I laughed)
>>674325056
Thanks m8
>>674325128
Haha. You see I learned one thing on my mission. Being pushy isn't very "Christ-like". It makes you look like a complete dick. But thank you for alerting me of my annoying counterparts.
>>674325156
Well I would disagree with you, but to put it shortly. Great.
>>674325423
Depends.
>>674325429
No. Very funny though. I chuckled.
can I fuck a mormon blonde blue eyed girl?
>>674325895
OP here. Correct, there is no place for the mongrel races in our world view.
>>674325895
No. It was in the past but... then the church said that we should not discriminate due to somebodies transgression. 1978 we allowed the "niggers" the priesthood.
Pulp or no pulp?
>>674326079
OP here. Good joke good joke. Sadly the past and present FLDS church hurt our normal regular church.
>>674327359
Mighty white of you, Mr. Deseret
>>674327304
If you rape her then technically. If you marry her then definitely.
>>674327436
Only fiction in the eyes of the heathens. Pulp Fiction per say.
>>674326413
Stop dodging me OP
>>674326413
A: I don't remember that verse I am sorry to say, but if that is the case than I have no idea.
B: God made them Indians. Essentially fucked their genetics beyond resemblance.
>>674328035
Sorry m8 I was just getting to your reply.
>>674328035
Anyways I'm abandoning thread and starting a new one. Thanks.
